The Man and His Plan

John just happens to be strolling down the corridor for the tenth time when he sees Rodney emerge from the transporter, yawning fiercely. His eyes are squeezed shut as he staggers into the hallway, and Rodney looks so exhausted and spent, John feels a touch of guilt.

But only a touch. Because John has a plan, a plan he's been planning all day, ever since that brief moment in the laundry room. Moving swiftly, he walks up behind Rodney and sings out, "Hello, Rodney. Long day?"

Rodney spins around, eyes wild. "Jesus, Colonel--"

"Power situation all taken care of?" John asks, even though he knows it is.

"Yes, yes it is. Now if you don't mind--" Rodney looks desperate as he points to his door. "I was about to--"

"You look exhausted," John agrees. "I mean, seriously exhausted. Time for you to be in bed."

"That was my intention, yes." Rodney's expression turns suspicious.

John places a hand onto the small of Rodney's back and guides him to his door. "Well, come on, let's get you into bed," he says, striving for his most innocent, "of course you can trust me" tone of voice.

"I assure you, Colonel, I am most capable of getting there on my own," Rodney says, but he lets John hustle him into his room.

The door slides shut behind them, and Stage One of John's plan is complete.

"I'm sure you are." John pats his shoulder happily. Rodney's shoulders are big and broad, and his unwavering solidness feels good under his palm. John moves his hand to the center of Rodney's back and pushes him toward the unmade bed. "I'm just helping."

"How very extraordinarily generous of you. Hey--" One more shove and Rodney trips over the basket of laundry, falling flat onto the mattress. He immediately rolls over and glares up at John. "That was completely uncalled for."

John ignores the angry look and joins him on the bed, neatly sidestepping the basket. He crawls between Rodney's legs as Rodney scoots back, regarding him with wide-eyed suspicion. John grabs Rodney's foot, preventing his escape. "Now, there's no need for you to sleep with your boots on, Rodney." He grips the ankle firmly and unlaces Rodney's shoe, slides it off and tosses it behind him. Then he peels off Rodney's sock and discards it, too.

"What are you *doing*?" Rodney sounds utterly perplexed, and John has to bite back a grin of delight in being able to stymie Rodney's great big genius brain.

"Taking your boots off for you," John explains. Lifting Rodney's other foot, John removes the second boot. It lands with a thump somewhere behind him.

"Thank you?" Rodney tries to pull his foot away but John holds tight. "Uh, hold it, hold it, you might not want to get too close--"

"Hmmm?" John peels off Rodney's sock and raises the foot higher, examining it. It's kind of cute, in a robust, Rodney-like way. Then he sniffs. "Nope, not particularly stinky." He strokes a finger over the callused sole.

Rodney jerks his foot out of John's hand. "Thank you, this is very weird, and it's not that I don't appreciate the assistance, but now, if you don't mind?"

"I don't mind at all." John tilts his head to one side, staring at Rodney, who is propped up on his elbows, confused and flushed. No way is John stopping now. He's so close to completing Stage Two of his plan.

"You're being deliberately obtuse," Rodney says. "That is not what I meant, and now will you please just let me get some sleep?"

John wags a finger at Rodney's chest. "You can't sleep in that shirt, it won't be comfortable. With that zipper and all." He reaches for the shirt, holding the collar steady with one hand as he unzips it, revealing pale skin and a sprinkling of light brown chest hair. "And look, you spilled coffee on it." John points to a dark splotch at the center of Rodney's shirt. "I think it works better if you drink the coffee, instead of wearing it."

Rodney is staring down at John's hands. "Why are you doing this? My shirt?" his voice rises in disbelief. "Radek bumped into me, it wasn't my fault that he wasn't looking--" He stops speaking when John grips the hem and pulls it up over his head.

"Come on, off with it," John encourages, and Rodney lifts his arms and works his way out of the shirt. "There, isn't that better?"

Rodney lies back, regarding John with narrowed eyes as he nods. He looks good shirtless, with a wide hairy chest, strong shoulders, neat little nipples. John, encouraged by the speechlessness, goes for the waistband of his pants. "In order to be really comfortable you have to get rid of these pants," he says as his fingers unfasten the buttons. "Sleeping in your underwear is much more comfortable, although--hey, that's right, you aren't *wearing* any underwear," John exclaims in mock surprise as he finishes unbuttoning.

Rodney's expression grows dazed as he lifts his hips, allowing John to pull his pants down. His silence is becoming unnerving, but John doggedly tugs Rodney's pants completely off, first one leg, then the other. He tosses the pants aside.

Stage Three of the Plan has been successfully completed.

John sits back on his heels taking a good look at Rodney's naked body--pale skin, strong thighs, his full cock thick and sturdy like the rest of him, and oh yes, Rodney is definitely interested. He can smell Rodney's sweat, it has been a long time since he showered, but it's a good smell, one that gets him right in the balls.

Rodney's chest is full of little curly hairs, and more hair leads down over his stomach, right to his pubic hair, which is full of wild little curls, too. His thighs are muscular and strong-looking. John is full of pride at getting this far in his plan. He has Rodney naked, and in bed, in bed and naked and hard. Rodney is damn hot, and all his--so naked--

Rodney sits up and grabs John by the collar, startling him. John only gets a glimpse of Rodney's determined face before Rodney kisses him.

It's a focused kiss, unwavering and single-minded just like Rodney himself. It's enough to make John forget his own name, to make John forget to breathe, and christ, he had no idea Rodney could kiss this good. It's almost a full minute of mouth-licking wonder before John realizes he can put his arms around Rodney, before he actually remembers he *has* arms to put around Rodney's hot, naked body. His hands fumble across Rodney's back and then things get even more mind-blowing when Rodney's mouth moves to bite and suck on his neck.

John whimpers, his mind in a crazy whirl of yes, yes, yes, more. Rodney's hand sneaks under his shirt and pinches his nipples and fuck, John needs to come, right now, he needs and wants to be naked and have that mouth to go everywhere and that's not how the plan is supposed to go.

Somehow John manages to gather his willpower and push Rodney back flat on the bed. "Wait a minute," he gasps. "Who's seducing who here?"

"That was your idea of a seduction?" Rodney asks, dumbfounded.

"You're naked, aren't you?"

Rodney rolls his eyes. "Okay, fine. Consider me seduced. Now will you get naked, too, please?"

"Oh. Okay." John springs up from the bed, happy to put Stage Four of the plan in motion. Things are back on track, and actually, it's going so much better than he expected. John pulls his shirt off, kicks off his shoes and socks, and drops his pants. Hands on his hips, he stands proudly as Rodney stares.

"You've got to be kidding me."

"What?" John looks down at his gaily-colored boxers, tented by his bulging erection. "Come you, you have to admit, they look damn good." He grins proudly.

Rodney's mouth goes crooked, one corner dipping down while the other side curves up. "Oh, right," he finally says. "Just--just come here."

John's pretty certain there's an unspoken 'you big dope' at the end of that sentence, but he doesn't care, because Rodney is pulling him down into the bed and kissing him again, sweetly this time. John lies over Rodney's warm, naked body, a hard cock poking insistently into his thigh. John wants to rub his entire body against Rodney, feel the crush of skin and muscle and bone. He groans into Rodney's mouth, fingers digging into Rodney's shoulders. Rodney's hands soothe him, sweeping through his hair, gliding down over his neck, caressing his shoulders, before working their way slowly down John's back, until, until--

"Hey," John says as Rodney takes hold of his boxers. He grabs Rodney's hands, brings them up alongside Rodney's head, and pins them down on the mattress. "No pulling them off until you admit they're really cool."

"They're ridiculous."

"They're cool," John counters, nipping at Rodney's chest. "They brought us together." He finds a nipple and sucks on it. Rodney makes noise and arches his back. Gratified, John sucks harder, and he has to hold Rodney's wrists down but with all the moaning it's entirely possible that Rodney likes it. A lot.

John certainly likes it. He likes the feel of Rodney's nipple in his mouth, the gasped exaltations, the way Rodney's body moves beneath his. The tip of Rodney's cock is wet against his leg. John wants to taste it, and his own cock is stiff and hard and needy.

But there's a plan. Of some sort. He had a plan, didn't he?

"Wait," John raises his head, panting. "The boxers."

Rodney's eyebrows rise. "Huh?"

"They're really cool," John insists. Because they are, and they aren't going to have sex until Rodney stops being so stubborn and admits that he is right.

"Maybe." Rodney gets a sly look. "Maybe I need to see them up close, just to be sure. Could you maybe move the hips up this way?"

"Oh," John says. "That's a really, really good idea. I think you're absolutely right." John brings his knees to either side of Rodney's waist, then carefully crawls forward. Rodney's hands are on his ass, urging him along, holding him steady.

"Maybe," Rodney says, eyeing John's cotton-clad dick, hovering just above his mouth. "Maybe not so ridiculous." He puts his mouth on it, breathing warm air over John's sensitive cock.

John shudders, hands pressed flat against the wall for balance as he straddles Rodney's head. "They're cool," he insists, struggling to keep his tone even.

"I said maybe." Rodney's hands slide up his thighs, under the legs of his boxers, pulling the material up tight over John's cock. John moans, because even just that feels good. Rodney responds by sliding the material back and forth over his cock.

"Rodney, please, oh god that's--that's--"

Rodney cups John's ass, hiking the underwear up even further. "So, is that a DC-3 right there on your dick?" he asks, conversationally.

"Rodney." John can hear the whine in his own voice, but he can't help himself. Rodney is pulling the fabric over his balls now and it's unbearably good.

"I'm just taking a good look at your non-sordid underwear." Rodney squeezes his ass. "Although, they're actually looking fairly sordid at the moment."

John rests his forehead against the cool wall. This isn't going at all to plan, but who needs a plan, when you've got a naked, smug Rodney between your legs? "I can be more sordid without them."

"Oh, no, no, I'm enjoying them now." Rodney licks and sucks on the head, wetting the thin fabric. He makes a twisting movement with his hands and the wet cotton rubs deliciously against the shaft.

"Damn it, Rodney." John reaches down, trying to shove the boxers away and free his cock. Rodney fights him, holding the boxers up, wedging them into the cleft of John's ass. Distracted, John rocks his hips, making the fabric slide against his opening. The dry cotton is rough on the delicate area in just the right way, enough to make John whimper with desire.

"You like that?" Rodney asks, pulling and twisting.

"Oh god yes, " John whispers. He moves his hips again, then slides his legs further apart, lowering himself so he can rub his still-covered cock against Rodney's face. "Please."

Rodney mouths John's cock, holding his hips steady, the fabric bunched up in his hands. It's sheer torture, just enough pressure and friction to make John crazy with need, not enough to come.

Soon John's legs begin to shake and finally Rodney pauses, urging him to one side. "Okay, okay, come on, lift and move over," he says. "I've got you."

John clutches the wall and lifts one leg, pivoting around and swinging it over Rodney's head. He's afraid he's going to whack Rodney in the nose with his knee, but Rodney holds him steady and oh god, the fabric slides and twists as he lands on his ass, back against the wall. He spreads his legs wide and Rodney rolls over at once, settling between John's legs to pull down the front of his boxers and free his cock.

Cool air then wet, wild mouth engulfing John, sucking and sliding over his cock. It's just what he needs, he can't hold back anything, not the noises and the begging, he can't stop saying Rodney's name and he can't stop his hips from moving, writhing against the bed. The cotton is still crammed up against his ass and that *mouth*, that rude, smirky mouth is going to make him lose what little mind he has left.

Rodney gives a little 'hmmm', and his mouth goes all the way down, tongue swirling and licking, and in one blinding rush John comes, grabbing at Rodney's shoulders and back as his body strains. When he finally slumps back down he's sure he really has lost a few brain cells but he's also absolutely certain that Rodney is the most wonderful person ever in the whole entire universe.

"Whoa," is all John can say. His hips jerk when Rodney releases his cock. "S'good," he manages to add. John's entire body is over-sensitized and twitchy, the wall is cold on his back and he shivers when Rodney licks his way up his chest, leaving a wet trail on his skin.

"Mmm. Sweaty," Rodney murmurs appreciatively, nuzzling at the base of John's throat. "And yes, I am good, thank you very much."

John strokes his hair, chuckling weakly. Rodney grabs his hand and kisses it, then raises his head and kisses John's lips. John can taste salt in Rodney's mouth, he doesn't know whether it's from his come or his sweat but it's wonderfully erotic. "Really, really good, " John agrees.

Rodney nudges John's hip with his cock. "Feel free to demonstrate your appreciation," he says, running a hand down John's chest. "Or is this your own special brand of torture, to look outrageously post-coital and hot--and, and--mmmph."

John has placed his hand over Rodney's mouth. "Lick," he says.

Rodney licks his palm, wetting it thoroughly. He watches as John moves the hand down to his cock. "Oh god," he says, all exasperation gone from his voice.

John gives it a firm stroke. "You're so impatient, Rodney."

"I've been hard since--since," Rodney gasps as John strokes again, "Since you made me grope you in the laundry room." He presses in, pushing his cock through John's fist, elbow banging on the wall as he slides closer. "You have an amazing ass."

"The groping--that was really sweet of you," John says, grinning at the memory.

Rodney gives him the 'are you insane' look, the one John likes to think is especially for him, and him only. He strokes Rodney's cock steadily, intent on making him come and he loves the way Rodney's face changes, becoming blissful and needy, loves the feel of Rodney's cock in his hand.

Rodney closes his eyes, rubbing his hand over John's chest distractedly. He mumbles "oh god", over and over, his voice rising in pitch, and when his eyes fly open again, they're impossibly blue and bright. John sees everything reflected in them, all the pleasure and wonder, and he can't stop staring, even after Rodney groans sharply and closes them again, cock jerking in his hand, coming hard, all over John's stomach.

"Oh, John," Rodney moans, crawling onto John. "Come here, I need--oh god." Rodney leans into him, panting, his hands moving restlessly over John's body.

"Wait, Rodney, kind of smooshed right now." John manages to slide down on the bed, smearing come all over Rodney but Rodney merely snuggles in closer, tucking his face into John's chest.

"A little overwhelmed here, can you please stop moving?"

"No," John says, with a laugh. The damn boxers have ridden all the way up and now are really uncomfortable. After a brief struggle he gets the them off, and despite Rodney's protests to just hold still, damn it, he wipes his stomach, and then Rodney's, before tossing them aside. "So, sex with me is overwhelming?" John asks, pleased beyond measure.

"Did I say that? I didn't say that." Rodney throws a leg over John's hips.

"Yes you did."

Rodney is kissing his shoulder and his hand moves from John's stomach up to his neck, then back down again. "Temporary insanity."

John kisses the top of this head. He likes the way Rodney can't seem to stop touching him. "You make me crazy, too." And he means every word of it, from the bottom of his heart.

"At least I don't wear ridiculous underwear." Rodney rubs his cheek against John's collarbone, then sighs, his body growing heavy. "And?" he taps John's chest. "They *are* ridiculous."

"Says you," John grumbles. He gets no response, and moment later Rodney is making small snoring noises. "We'll save the rest of this discussion for later," John whispers to him, and smiles.

He just knows Rodney is going to look great in those boxers.

Stargate Atlantis (including all characters and images) is the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No copyright infringement is intended or should be inferred. This is a nonprofit fan site.

The Grrrl's site is maintained by The Grrrl