Copyrat

by: Mainecoon
[Author's Note: This story teeters on the very thin line between a G and a PG rating. I'm tempted to give it a PG rating for weirdness, but I'm not really a terribly good judge of what deserves a rating like that. So I'll just warn all readers here and now. This story gets weird. Very weird. I mean weird like the climax is staged inside a giraffe enclosure at the St. Canard Zoo. Also, I do kill one character, but he's technically my character. Don't worry about that. Otherwise, I worked pretty hard on this story and I'd appreciate it if you could overlook my weirdness and read it!! Thanks! ~M]

This story starts, as most stories do,
With a hero and villain and complex decision.
But who is the hero, and who is the villain?
The final decision is left up to you.


CHAPTER 1: The Die is Cast


The end of yet another exciting adventure was marked by the rising of the sun over St. Canard. Darkwing Duck, the gallant protector of the city, trudged home through the chilled Autumn wind. He dragged his tired feet to the front door of his suburban home. He paused a moment before entering.

As soon as the door clicked shut, two shadowy figures leaped from the bushes and scurried to a window. They peeked over the edge, their eyes narrow and sparkling in the dusky dawn.

Inside, Darkwing looked wearily upon the figure of a red-haired girl who slept curled on the floor with her face buried in her arms. He sighed and scooped her gently into his arms. The child's eyes, shadowy from trying to hide tears shed earlier in the night, fluttered open. A smile touched her mouth as she drifted back into sleep. Her face was less troubled than it had been but a moment before. Darkwing carried the girl up the stairs.

The two dark figured turned from the window. As a misty dew fell, blue sparks flew from the helmet of one of the pair.

"Drat," he muttered. "Rain. Perfect."

The second shadow jingled the bells on his jester cap, giggling softly. "Serves you right for insisting we follow him, Sparky."

"Why do you call me that??" the rodent demanded.

The jester shrugged. "I love to irritate you, Megs. It's so rewarding."

Megavolt growled under his breath. "You won't find it so rewarding when I fry that big beak of yours into a pile of ashes! My goggles are fogging up!"

"Oh lighten up," Quackerjack smirked. "It's just a little dewfall. Why did we follow that stupid duck, anyway? We escaped. He didn't catch us. We could be in Rio right now."

Megavolt chuckled sourly. "And the boss would come right after us with a chainsaw."

"Yeah… well… um… Yeah, I guess he would but…"

"But nothing!"

They walked on in silence. Megavolt had had the last word. But that wouldn't last long.

Soon they were back at the hideout. The “little dewfall” turned into a heavy downpour. True to his predictions, Megavolt completely shorted out. Quackerjack, however, pranced about in the rain as if the entire concept of pneumonia was a blessing.
"Nyeah nyeah," he teased at the raindrops. "Can't hurt me! Hey Megs! I know! You're a water rat, right?" Quackerjack laughed as they entered the hideout: an old abandoned factory. Megavolt slammed the door behind himself, muttering about duck flambé.

As shaky as their friendship seemed, Megavolt and Quackerjack were not easily made into enemies. They teased each other to no end. Their private wars escalated at times to the point of death threats and physical violence, though neither actually intended to harm the other. It was touch-and-go. The two were as different as cheese and broccoli, but they were friends.

The would-be spies found Bushroot and the Liquidator playing Gin Rummy in the furnace room. When they entered, there was a moment of tense surprise among the group. But the moment passed as quickly as it had come once all four realized to their relief that their boss, Negaduck, was not present.

"Hey guys!" Quackerjack chirped cheerily. "Wanna come out in the rain with me?"

Bushroot looked up from his cards. "I don't think so," he said. "I… uh… already watered myself this morning."

Quackerjack looked hopefully at the Liquidator. "Come on, ol' buddy! Don't you like getting wet? It's not like you can be anything else."

"Survey says… a warm Liquidator is a happy Liquidator! Warning! Do not expose to sub-zero temperatures!" He hadn't even bothered to remove his careful gaze from the pile of cards in the middle of the table. Bushroot was far too good at cheating by growing vines out of the table long enough to peek at the next card while his opponent's attention was distracted.

Quackerjack pouted. "Fine then! You're no fun! Sub-zero temperatures… bah! Wimps." He marched out onto the balcony and proceeded to hang upside-down from the railing, letting the rain fall on the underside of his beak. The feeling made him laugh, then sing. "Drip, drop, pitter, patter! It's so silly, it doesn't matter!" he sang merrily.

Megavolt yanked the shades closed and went back to his spot beside the furnace, where a bright fire was crackling. He took off every article of soaked clothing except his yellow jumper and waterproof boots and set them on the rug to dry in the fire's heat. He let the jumper dry without removing it.

"How was the heist?" Bushroot asked more out of politeness than curiosity. Megavolt's gloomy air told him all he needed to know about the success of the night's quest.

"Not bad, actually," Megavolt answered. "Er… it would have been not bad if that idiot toy maker hadn't screwed things up by insisting that we should stop at the toy store on the way. He never lets me stop at the electric store!" Megavolt crossed his arms sulkily. "If we hadn't been so late, we'd have gotten away from Darkwing Dork with more than just our lives and a pocket watch." He pulled said watch from his pocket, dangling it in the light of the fire. "It's not even real gold! Negaduck's gonna be so mad."

"Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the electric socket," the Liquidator bubbled.

Bushroot shrugged. "He's always like this when he gets shorted out. Gin."

He spread his cards over the table. The Liquidator gaped.

"You cheated! That's the twelfth game you've won so far!"

Bushroot tossed back his purple hair proudly. "You know what they say, Licky. Lady Luck is a fickle woman. Besides, you beat me fifteen times yesterday. Where's our score card? Mark up 25 points plus…" He glanced at the Liquidator's cards. "Ooh, twenty-three! That makes… 48 points total!"

"Hmph!" The Liquidator gathered the cards. "That's all very well and good, but I'm shuffling this time!"

Meanwhile, Megavolt slowly blocked his colleagues' voices from his mind.

As the fire lent its warmth to his shivering, wet body, he let his memory wander back to the girl with red hair. Who was she? Obviously a relative of Darkwing's. A niece, perhaps. Or maybe a daughter. But where was her mother?

Such questions! But wouldn't it be nice to have someone waiting when work was over? Not just anybody. Certainly not the likes of Bushroot and the Liquidator. Someone who cared… someone who wanted to be just like you…

To these thoughts, Megavolt's eyes grew dimmer and dimmer until finally they closed. With the rain pitter-pattering and the fire crackling, he slept.

It had been a long night, but there were longer nights to come.



CHAPTER 2: Coulomb


"All right you knobs!" Negaduck's harsh voice woke Megavolt from his dreams.

The tempest still raged outside the factory. Megavolt glanced at the clock on the wall. The hands proclaimed the time to be 8:45, which meant it was a quarter after noon. Still blinking the sleep from his eyes, he dragged himself to his feet and joined the motley group gathered around the card table.

"What's up, boss?" Megavolt yawned. Negaduck flashed his flunkies his patented evil Grimace. The other four watched expectantly, while inside all four trembled with apprehension. The Grimace meant bad things were coming.

"It's high time we got a really big scheme moving, boys. We've been hiding out too long now. We don't want our city's do-gooders to loose their touch, do we?"

The Fearsome Four collectively shook their heads.

"Good. Here's what I've got planned…" He explained to them a complex trade ring that was to be established with a group of seafaring rats from London. The St. Canardians ("that's you knobs," he clarified) would provide gold, silver, and copper trinkets in exchange for foreign merchandise that could be sold on the black market for ten times it's original price.

Negaduck's eyes gleamed with anticipation as he described the vast sums of money that would soon be at their finger tips. His excitement was contagious.

"When do we start, boss?" Quackerjack asked. Negaduck's Grimace was instantly replaced by an aggravated scowl.

"The storm is keeping them out of port. As soon as it moves on, I'll arrange a rendezvous and give you knobs more information. Until then, just… do something constructive."

"So we've got time off?" Bushroot could hardly believe it.

"Yeah sure." Negaduck waved his hand, dismissing the question. "Just stay local. I might decide to make you all useful before long." With that, he strode from the room with his cape billowing behind him.

"Time off!" Quackerjack breathed, his voice barely over a whisper from the shock. "He never gives us time off!!"

The Liquidator frowned. "Survey says… something fishy is up!"

Bushroot nodded but said optimistically, "Well we've got time off! Let's make good use of it!"

The Liquidator and Quackerjack exchanged glances, then looked at Bushroot. "The Old Haunt!" the three said in unison. They bustled towards the door.

"Hey Megs! You comin'?" Quackerjack called back to his companion, who was leaning against the card table wearing a thoughtful expression.

"Nah, you guys go ahead. I've got some… work to do in the lab."

"Suit yourself."

As soon as the crowd dispersed, Megavolt pulled on his gloves and battery. Blue crackles of static electricity danced up and down the prongs of his helmet as he rushed down to his basement lab. Once the door was closed, it did not open again for several days.

During those several days, the moods of the supervillains worsened with the weather. Negaduck stopped in only once to vent his anger concerning a message he had received explaining why his London contacts were sailing on and would return in a month. Without Megavolt to be the object of amusement, Bushroot, Quackerjack, and the Liquidator were reduced to bickering among themselves and skulking around their lair wearing narrowed eyes and dejected frowns.

Finally, a decision was reached. It was the kind of decision that people reach after being stuck indoors together for three days with nothing better to do than argue and skulk. The decision was made without any of them speaking a word. They didn't need to speak. The solution to their problems was frightfully obvious!

Megavolt had to come out.

Together the terrible threesome trooped down to Megavolt's basement lab.

For the last several days, the sound of clanking metal, flashing lights, and a strange smell of burning rubber had poured without stop from beneath the door. But now an eerie quiet invaded the hallway around the room. A sudden nervousness overtook the group. No one was willing to be the first to knock until, with some amount of cajoling, Bushroot stepped forward. He raised his hand, paused, then knocked determinedly. There was no answer. Encouraged by the fact that nothing had jumped out at him unexpectedly, Bushroot tried again.

"Megavolt! We know you're in there!" he called in the bravest-sounding voice he could muster. "Come out now or… or…"

"…Or face the consequences!" Quackerjack finished.

A muffled reply slithered from behind the thick metal door. "Coming!"

So they waited. Bushroot was getting ready to deliver a good, sound kick to the door when, without warning, it swung open. Megavolt stood there, looking worn out but grinning. He tilted his head slightly, giving his already lopsided smile an almost sinister look.

"We're ready now," he said, doing his best to make himself sound mysterious. "One moment."

The frazzled electro-rodent disappeared again into the messy lab. The Liquidator stick his head far enough inside to get a look at a few bizarre objects lying just inside the door.

"Tired of those useless old metal things cluttering up your basement or attic? Donate them to Sparky's home for the mechanically insane!" He backed away just as Megavolt reappeared. He looked excitedly over his shoulder and turned to them. Every part of his body was aglow with blue sparks.

"And now, gentlemen… may I present… COULOMB!!" Megavolt swept himself dramatically out of the doorway to reveal a young boy, about 12 years old. He was Megavolt in every aspect. His face, his eyes, his peculiar way of standing with his knees bent and spread apart. He had long, scruffy brown hair that reached almost down to his shoulders and fell over his red goggles.

The rest of his costume was modeled off of Megavolt's, with blue where the yellow should have been and green where the blue was. He wore neither a helmet nor a battery. Not even a utility belt was strapped around his narrow waist. And yet… he simply was Megavolt.

The other three stared in amazement. Words flew from their minds, leaving them as blank as a sheet of new paper. They all stood in the hallway studying each other until the boy spoke.

"What're you all staring at? Haven't you ever seen a kid before??" His voice, too, was unmistakably that of the supervillain.

Quackerjack was the first to regain control of his senses. "Megavolt," he stammered, "Who… what… how…"

Megavolt put his arm around the boy's shoulders. "Scientifically speaking, Coulomb is me," he explained.

"But… but… **how**????"

Coulomb answered. "An electronic cloning device. It analyzes the specific energy patterns of certain genes then duplicates those patterns to create a twin of a prespecified age. The machine also duplicates intelligence, skill, and wisdom while leaving the duplicate able to absorb more information." After repeating the information, he looked up to Megavolt. "Right?" he asked apprehensively.

"Perfect!" Megavolt laughed.

"Oh, that it is!" a deep voice echoed through the hall. All eyes turned in horror to see Negaduck sauntering towards them. He looked down at Coulomb, an amused half-smirk over his beak. "Well, well, Sparky. So you have done something constructive with your time. You've gone and discovered immortality!"

Megavolt and Coulomb watched the mad duck with the same terror-filled eyes. "What… what do you mean?" Megavolt asked.

Negaduck laughed mockingly. "Don't you see, you imbecile? It's a perfect cure for death! Simply clone yourself back to normal again… it's marvelous! Why, I could dominate the world with an army made entirely of me! What could be better than that? Where's the machine?"

Megavolt blinked, confused by the bombardment of information. "It's… uh… over… in there…" he said, hurriedly responding to the last thing said to him. Negaduck shoved Megavolt and Coulomb to the side and entered the lab.

"Where?" he demanded. Megavolt obediently pointed to a large machine that looked like a re-designed refrigerator.

"All right," Negaduck said. "Clone me."

"What? Now?"

"Of course now, you knob! Go on! Clone me!"

"I… I… that is… I mean I…"

"You what, spark breath?"

"I can't!" Megavolt blurted out.

Negaduck's expression went from evil-incarnate-bent-on-taking-over-the-world to really-mad-evil-incarnate-bent-on-taking-over-the-world. "Why not?" he snarled.

Megavolt held Coulomb behind him and was slowly inching towards the door. "Because… um… it's… the machine that is… it's… um… resting."

Negaduck grabbed Megavolt by the collar of his shirt. Coulomb scampered quickly to the other three villains, who were still hovering in the doorway, ready to run if anything should happen. "It's… resting." Every syllable, every letter of his words dripped with contempt. Megavolt nodded meekly.

"It's a big operation," he explained. "The machine might… uh… explode or something if it doesn't have a chance to cool off."

Negaduck shoved Megavolt backwards, sending him sprawling at the feet of his comrades. "Get out of my sight," Negaduck hissed.

They were only too happy to oblige.



CHAPTER 3: The Plot Thickens


Megavolt and Coulomb sat in a dreary vacant room somewhere in the labyrinth of unused space in the factory/hideout. While Megavolt pondered their situation, Coulomb played a game of zapping intricate patterns on the wood floor.

"These powers are so great!" he said. "What are we doing in here, anyway?"

Megavolt sighed. "Running away from Negaduck."

"Why?"

"Because he's powerful and mean and in a really bad mood. You don't mess with people like that."

"Why not?"

"Because they're very likely to decide to hurt you. And I can't fight him back."

"Why?"

"Because he's the boss! Stop asking so many questions! We have to figure out what to do!" Megavolt buried his face in his hands, trying to block out the rest of the world.

"I thought we were doing something."

"We are."

"Oh…"

"But we need to do something else. About the cloning machine. If Negaduck figures out how it works, we're all doomed!!"

"That's pretty bad, huh?"

Megavolt nodded as well as he could with his face hidden in his hands.

The conversation ceased as the two supercharged rodents wracked their frazzled brains for a solution.

"We could destroy the machine," Coulomb offered at last. Megavolt looked up.

"Destroy it? How can we destroy it? He's probably guarding it!"

Coulomb frowned. "Guarding… guarding… guardian… the guardian… Darkwing Duck!"

"WHERE?!" Megavolt jumped to his feet. His eyes darted quickly around the room and his hands began to glow with zapping power.

"We could get him to help us! He wants to destroy Negaduck, right?"

Megavolt flopped back down onto the wooden crate he had been sitting on.

"Was I really that dumb when I was twelve or are you just saying that 'cause you don't know either one of them?"

"Uh…. The second one… I think… But what's wrong with getting Darkwing's help?"

"Dorkwing wants to destroy me as much as he wants to destroy the boss! And you know what that means?"

"What?"

"He wants to get you too!"

"But that's not fair! I won't technically be you for at least six years! Then at least I'll be old enough to be you."

Megavolt shrugged. "Them's the kicks, kid. From now on, I gotta find some way to get you out of here before Dorkwing and the boss find you. If I don't, we're both toast."

"And if you do?"

Megavolt shrugged. "You go on living your life and be whatever I would have been. The powers you got from the machine will wear off."

"Aw, but I like zapping things!"

"Trust me, kid, it's not all it's cracked up to be. What's out there…"

Megavolt pointed to the window, "…That's what you're meant for."

Coulomb went to the window and pressed his nose against it. The streets below and the sky above and everything in between was stained velvet gray by the rain. Only the autumn trees shot forth in flames of red, orange, and fading yellow. Megavolt joined his duplicate at the window. They stood there side-by-side, remembering how fate had brought them to these places.

The spell was broken when Coulomb suddenly let out an angry yell and kicked the window as hard as he could. Megavolt didn't even bat an eye. He had tried the same thing on the same window with no more results than Coulomb got. There followed a string of highly uncalled for adjectives, most of which any normal twelve-year-old who heard them would not know the meaning of.

Megavolt just leaned against the window, waiting for Coulomb to calm down.

"Feeling better now?" he asked when the child had stopped leaping around the room.

"Actually, yes," Coulomb said. "You should try that some time."

"I have."

"Oh. Right."

"So…"

"So what?"

"Sew buttons on your pants."

Coulomb groaned. "Must you stoop to repeating such horrible puns?"

"Yes."

The two stared defiantly into each other's eyes until Coulomb decided to end the contest by getting up and marching towards the door.

"Hey, where are you going?" Megavolt called after him.

"Elsewhere," Coulomb answered. And before Megavolt could leap up to give chase, the child had disappeared.

In a rare flash of brilliance, Megavolt realized something vital. Coulomb was going to do exactly what he would do in these circumstances.

Specifically, if Megavolt knew a thing about himself, he knew that Coulomb was going to go out and destroy something. Probably something fairly large and expensive. So in order to relocate himself, all Megavolt had to do was wait and watch the local news for stories about large explosions.

That is exactly what he did. And, of course, several hours later the reporters took to following the hot trail of destruction which, according to the Expert Darkwing Duck himself, could only be that nefarious villain Megavolt.

The nefarious villain, for once the innocent party, turned the television volume up and sat back to watch the fun for a while. Coulomb, he knew, would be all right. Just as long as he didn't try to liberate the giraffes at the zoo, he would be all right.

Even as he thought those thoughts, a feeling of impending doom settled over Megavolt. He began to wonder if it might not be a good idea to go find his rebellious duplicate before the giraffes were forced to suffer a second liberation attempt by the same child…

* * * * *

Darkwing Duck, the best crime fighter in St. Canard, was puzzled, baffled, and otherwise totally confused by that night's bizarre turn of events. He had been trailing somebody he assumed to be Megavolt for three hours… and yet by the brief glimpses he caught of his prey, Darkwing could hardly call the villain anything more than a child.

Something very very fishy was going on. And he meant to find out what.

The Ratcatcher zoomed along the dim, wet streets. Darkwing was soaked thoroughly. His helmet visor was so fogged up he could hardly see where he was going. He managed, however, to finally discover that the mysterious Megavolt impersonator was heading straight for the Zoo.

The Zoo?

Nothing good can come of this.

* * * * *

While Darkwing and Megavolt were devising their own ways of chasing and capturing the overcharged Coulomb, Negaduck was trying to figure out how to work the cloning machine. He pushed buttons, flicked switches, even tried using his own common sense! But there was very little sense in the makings of the machine.

Hour after hour he tinkered and toyed with it. He managed to do every possible thing imaginable with it except clone himself. He blew several things to smithereens, he shrunk an old television controller down to the size of a lima bean. He even miraculously managed to change the color scheme of his costume to what can only be described as "luau."

Then, finally, at long last, it occurred to him that perhaps you had to turn the machine on from the inside. After all, if the machine couldn't be operated from the inside, how did that maniacal moron manage to duplicate himself?

Negaduck stepped into the machine and closed the door. When the door clicked shut, a little light turned on. The light shone directly onto a small switchboard that had only two buttons: "Open" and "Duplicate." Without a single moment of hesitation, Negaduck pushed the button labeled "Duplicate."



CHAPTER 4: The Madness Continues


A quiet buzzing sound surrounded Negaduck, penetrating him to the very core of his being. He knew there was light, but he could not see it. He knew there was pain, but he could not feel it. He knew he was afraid, but he felt only courage. That was the most terrifying thing of all.

He could not tell how much time passed. Everything was all swirled together in a sensation unlike anything he had ever felt before. It was the greatest thing he had ever felt, but at the same time it was far worse than a thousand lifetimes of torture. He could not understand it, he could not stop it. He could only wait.

Then it was over. The light above his head clicked on, illuminating the two buttons. Negaduck clumsily reached for the button to open the door. He stumbled out of the machine, dazed. He wanted to run a thousand miles, but he was afraid that if he moved he would fall unconscious.

A quiet, peculiarly feminine voice brought him back to the world of the living. "Are you all right?"

Negaduck tried to answer, but he found that his mouth would not move the way he ordered it too. He slurred something that was meant to be words, but sounded like helpless groaning. His helplessness frustrated and infuriated him. He couldn't stand being powerless, especially in the company of a female. His anger worked to his advantage, lending him strength.

"Wwwhhaaatt… hhh… aaaappennnd?" he managed after a few tries. His eyes were still too blurred for him to see clearly. The soft, sweet voice returned, this time accompanied by a second high-pitched giggling sound.

"You were in that cloning machine. You tried to clone yourself."

Negaduck felt something marvelously cool and wet poured down his throat.

Water. And over his head. More. Yes, things were coming clearer now. Clearer…

There was not one, but two products of the machine. Both were female.

They were ducks, sure enough, but they were unlike any ducks Negaduck had known to walk the streets of St. Canard. Their feathers were of the softest blue. The one who had made him drink water had a head of bushy feathers not entirely unlike Bushroot's hair, only pulled back. From the middle of her forehead, five white lightning bolt stripes branched out and grew to make five white streaks, plus one straight line of white leading from her silver beak to her forehead. She wore a long white lab coat and a tight suit of black with a light bulb pictured clearly on the chest.

The second duck was smaller. Her feathers grew as bushy as her sister clone's, but they stuck out over her face. She had three lightning bolt stripes. One in the center that began at her beak and ended at the base of the back of her head, and two others that began there and curled around her head like a Grecian half-crown made of olive leaves. She wore a long black skirt that flowed like a waterfall, and what amounted to a black bikini top.

She batted her eyes and grinned at Negaduck.

"So, sweets, it looks like we're one and the same," she murmured. "How about we… test that theory?" She put her arms around Negaduck's neck. He pulled away, utterly confused.

"What in the name of Pete happened?? How did I become… you? Who ARE you????"

The lightbulb-toting duck hopped onto a table and sat there. "Well, when you were messing about with all those switches, a couple things happened. First, you set the thing to make two clones. Second, you told the program to mix the last clone's traits with yours. Third, you also disconnected some of the gene magnets, leaving room for the computer to improvise."

"So what you're saying," Negaduck growled, "Is that you two are the children of me and… Megavolt?!"

"That's right, daddykins," said the smaller sister. "We're all yours!"

Still trying to absorb the fact that he had just apparently become the father of Megavolt's children, Negaduck asked the only question that seemed logical at the time. "So… uh… do you two have names or what?"

"Yes and no," the lightbulb girl answered. "We know our names, but you can change them. We know names that would be given to us by one of the parents."

"Okay… So… what are they?"

The lightbulb girl pointed to her sister. "That's Quanta, and I'm Ampera. We know these names because we have inherited part of the minds of both you and our other father."

"Great. One big happy family, eh?"

Quanta twirled around and rested her chin on Negaduck's shoulder. "That's right! Time for us to settle down and have some quality family time," she giggled. "Isn't that right, Ampera?"

Ampera crossed her arms. "It's lovely for you to talk that way, but what about Megavolt? And where is the other clone?"

Quanta smiled coyly. "You can go find Megavolt, dear sister, but I doubt there will be enough room for his darling little clone too. Besides, isn't he a bit young for you?"

Ampera took the time to stare daggers at her sister before returning her attention to Negaduck. "What happened to the clone?"
"You mean Coulomb? He's off in a rage running amuck somewhere."

"Then we have to find him."

"Why? I think I might just rather stick around here for a while…"

Negaduck threw Quanta a little half-smile.

"Because we'll all be up to our shoulders in bad broccoli if we don't."

Negaduck shrugged. "Have it your way. I personally couldn't care one way or another. As far as I'm concerned, Sparky and Sparky Jr. can go on a liberate-the-giraffes campaign until Kingdom Come."

"A what?"

"If I remember correctly, Megavolt has a peculiar fondness for liberating the Zoo's critters. He usually picks giraffes. I guess it's because their horns look like lightbulbs or something." Negaduck was only paying half of his attention to the conversation with Ampera. The rest of his mind, and everything else, was in the process of becoming the sole property of Quanta.

Ampera sighed. Obviously these two were going to be no help whatsoever.

And so, without the slightest idea where she was going, what she was looking for, or even exactly why she was bothering, she set off in the direction of the Zoo. Or she thought it was the direction of the Zoo. With her muddled memories, it could be the way to Zanzibar for all she knew.



CHAPTER 5: Here a Clone, There a Clone


"I hate rain, I hate rain, I hate rain, I hate rain…" That is exactly what Megavolt was repeating to himself over and over and over as he made his way through the storm to the Zoo. The fact that his mode of transportation was a skateboard didn't make matters much better. However, the rain had been falling with less abundance than it had earlier in the day.

Despite the fact that he was wearing a plastic parka Megavolt gave up all hope of staying dry as soon as he left the Fearsome Five's hideout. He resigned himself to being wet and practically powerless for the time being.

It was more important to find Coulomb and destroy the cloning machine before Negaduck figured out how to use it.

These and similar thoughts enveloped the inventor as he skateboarded clumsily towards the Zoo. Or rather, in the direction he thought the Zoo should be. Because his mind was so busy, he failed to notice the young woman directly in front of him. In a very short time, they were both sitting on the ground in a puddle staring at each other with a strikingly similar dazed expression.
"Hey, look where you're going!" they both said simultaneously. "No you look… no… stoppit!" They both stopped talking. They sat there in the rain looking at each other for a minute before they both said, at the exact same moment, "Who are you?" The same annoyed frown and furrowed brows showed themselves on each face, but instead of trying to speak alone again, the woman grabbed Megavolt and held his mouth shut.

"All right, enough of that game," she said coolly. "My name is Ampera. I'm trying to find two people named Megavolt and Coulomb. I've heard they're at the Zoo. Do you know where that is?" She loosened her grasp to allow Megavolt to speak. He straightened up, rubbing his nose.

"That hurt," he said. "I'm Megavolt. Coulomb's still at the Zoo. That's where I'm going. Who's asking anyway?"

Ampera sighed with relief. "Oh thank goodness I've found you! Negaduck's learned how to operate the cloning machine…"

"WHAT?!" Megavolt's eyes nearly popped out of his goggles.

"But he muddled things a bit by playing with the buttons. The machine used your genes as well as his."

"So… I've got a kid whose father is also Negaduck??"

"Two, actually. Me and my sister. My sister takes after his side of the family."

Megavolt promptly fainted.

* * * * *

Darkwing was absolutely correct in thinking that something fishy was developing in the Zoo. Specifically, just outside the giraffes' enclosure. By the time he got there, it was a regular convention. The attendees were as follows: a young boy dressed in a costume very much like Megavolt's who was trying to rile up the giraffes, two young women with the most unique feathers Darkwing had ever seen, the entire Fearsome Five minus Megavolt, and a hobo in a huge parka with a skateboard. From the looks of things, the majority of the group didn't seem to have any idea what they were doing there.

This was definitely going to be a weird night. Darkwing inched the Ratcatcher along slowly, watching the bizarre goings-on. When it became apparent that either nobody noticed or nobody cared about his presence, he got off the motorcycle and strolled over to the taller of the blue-feathered ducks. She was hovering over the hobo looking concerned. Darkwing tapped her shoulder.

"Excuse me, miss… Would you mind telling me exactly what is going on here?"

The woman turned. Darkwing was momentarily taken aback by the lightening bolt design on her forehead. The woman took a deep breath and began to talk.

"Well when Quanta and I appeared out of nowhere, but actually not nowhere, Coulomb was already on his way here to liberate the giraffes. Quanta and my father said they were going to stay behind, but they're here now. I came and ran into my father Megavolt on the way here to find Coulomb, but my dad kinda went unconscious and now those three weirdoes showed up. I think they're here because my father told them to be here, but I don't…"

"Wait a minute, slow down!" Darkwing shook his head. "Let me get this straight… Who are you?"

"I've been asked that a lot today. I think I should wear a nametag. I'm Ampera."

"Okay… and your father is Negaduck?"

Ampera nodded.

"And Megavolt?"

Ampera nodded again.

"HOW?!"

"It's a long story. I was just trying to shorten it because I kinda need to go get Coulomb away from the giraffes."

"Who's Coulomb?"

Ampera pointed to the boy in the giraffes' enclosure. "He's Megavolt's clone."

"Uh-huh… and you know this how?"

"I inherited some of my father's knowledge. I've never actually met either of them… Well I did meet my father Megavolt, but only briefly."

Darkwing raised his eyebrows. "Tell me something… is this whole group on some kind of drugs or something?"

Ampera gave Darkwing a Look. "Say, who are you anyway?"

"Oh, I am the terror that flaps in the night, the horror blah blah blah… I'm Darkwing Duck."

"Ah… I see… impressive… right… well…" Ampera turned back to the still unconscious Megavolt. Since nobody was actually doing anything illegal yet (stupid, yes. Bizarre, yes. Completely illogical, yes. But illegal, no), he decided to meander over to the guardrail and watch the show.

Coulomb, or rather, Megavolt at the age of 12, had perched himself in a tree overlooking the giraffes. He was shouting what sounded like rally slogans from right out of the '60s. The whole spectacle was greatly amusing.

Meanwhile, Ampera was trying to get her father to wake up.

"Megavolt! Wake up! You exasperating rodent, wake UP!!" He yelling had little to no effect. Time for Plan B: the bucket of cold water.

That did the job. Megavolt sat up with a start, sputtering and coughing from having a bucket of water dumped on his head. "What the…?!" He looked around. It didn't take him long to figure out what was going on. "Oh criminy."

Ampera grabbed her father by his collar. She had definitely inherited certain traits from both ends of the family. "Megavolt!"

"I'm listening!" he coughed.

"Go get your butt outta that tree!"

"Huh?"

Ampera rather forcibly turned Megavolt's face in the general direction of Coulomb.

"Oh," he said.

"Dad, did you remember to check the energy leak potential in your clones?"

"Uh… no, I.. GAH!! You don't mean…?!" Megavolt leaped to his feet and grabbed Ampera by her collar.

"I certainly do mean. I mean very much. Now you'd better go get your butt outta that tree before one of you goes completely berzonkers."

Megavolt was off and running. It was not long before he had joined Coulomb in the tree. Darkwing edged his way over to Ampera.

"What exactly do you… er… mean?" he asked.

Ampera sighed. "Megavolt transferred his powers into that clone, but his 12-year-old body wasn't made to withstand them. So all that power is trying to store itself in places that don't exist, which means that if that tree gets struck by lightening, which according to my calculations is extremely likely right now, all that power will suddenly release itself."

"And I take it that's a bad thing?"

"Kaboom," Ampera said.

"I see…. Kaboom, eh… oh dear." Darkwing decided to leave the problem of the kaboom alone for a moment and go investigate the rest of the Fearsome Five.

Negaduck and Quanta were sitting quite peacefully on a bench nearby. They were all but oblivious to their surroundings. Bushroot was playing with some bushes, Quackerjack was playing with Bushroot's hair, and the Liquidator was splitting himself into various puddles and sneaking up on unsuspecting victims (Quacky and Bushy) who would then step into him, fall, and become even wetter than they already were (if such a thing is possible).

Darkwing decided to see just how bizarre this scene could get. "'Scuse me, fellows," he said, "what are you doing here?"

All three looked at Darkwing. "Nothing," they said.

"Negaduck told us to come here and watch the giraffes," Quakerjack said.

"But so far Megavolt gets to have all the fun."

"I see…" If the three supervillains recognized him, they obviously didn't care that he was hanging around. "Man, this is a weird day," Darkwing said to himself. He left the squabbling supervillains to take his old place at the guardrail.

As he watched the giraffes, Negaduck and Quanta casually stood up and went to the three supervillains. Negaduck had to kick Quackerjack to get their attention.

"Did you take care of the walls?" he whispered.

"Sure, boss. All taken care of. Kerosene all over the place." Quackerjack assured him. The others nodded.

"Good. Now let's just sit back, relax, and hope the metal plates in that tree do their job."

Bushroot, Quackerjack, and the Liquidator obediently took their seats on the guardrail. High above, a distant roll of thunder sounded its deep beat over the city.



CHAPTER 6: Kaboom


At the sound of the thunder, for a brief moment everything stopped. Even the rain stopped. Light drifted into the places where the raindrops had been.

Though the sun had nearly set, there was a strange brightness in the air. Tension hummed in the air, vibrating on the ends of feathers and whiskers. Time itself stood still. Far above the tree, a flash of silver lit the sky. It trickled from one loud to the next, leaped into the sky, and came crashing down directly onto the tree supporting Megavolt and Coulomb.

"Direct hit!!" Negaduck cheered. Darkwing, Ampera, and the rest of the group could only watch, wide-eyed, as a cloud of smoke rose around the tree.

Sparks flew, but they were not from either of the sparky inventors. They were from Negaduck's carefully planned kerosene fire.

The fire spread quickly all around the giraffes' enclosure, then engulfed the main building. The spell was broken at last when a young giraffe foal cried out in terror.

Then all Hell broke loose.

In the heat and light of the flames, everyone sprang to action. It was a mad, confused race to simply strike out and hit something. Panic. Rage. Terror. All pulsed through the veins of the nightly wanderers.

The night wore on and the battle was a fierce one. It was joined soon by the city fire department and police force, but they could get nowhere near the battlegrounds. It was impossible to see. Smoke and heat blinded the warriors until they no longer fought anybody but themselves.

Who knows how long it lasted? Time stopped when the lightening struck and sealed the fate of the two who perched there… whatever that fate might be.

But eventually the fight slowed. The original warriors were huddled in a close group at the far end of the giraffe enclosure. They said nothing. It was all they could do to breathe. Flashing lights and shouting voices surrounded them on all sides. But their minds rested on only one thing: What happened?

It was like a spell-an evil spell that took them over. Time was still frozen, so it was not over yet. The police and fire fighters began to gather behind the bloody, exhausted fighters. Together, all watched, expectant.

A shadow was there. It moved forward with the wind, and back with the flames, and forward again until it stepped out onto the scorched grass. Megavolt, alive but weak, staggered forward. In his arms he held Coulomb, himself, a child. Dead. Dead, or dying. The villain's eyes were on the boy's face always. The fire had not touched them, but it had come close. Both wore suits now burned and blackened.

Megavolt walked slowly. It was painful, certainly. All eyes were upon them. Nobody dared to move and make time move as well. Megavolt stopped a few yards from the group. Ampera drew in a shaking breath as her father sank to his knees with the child-himself-in his arms. He raised his eyes only to meet Darkwing's gaze. For an instant, there was an understanding between them.

Then, Megavolt looked back down at the boy's burned face. So young, so pained. He brushed a strand of soft brown hair from the blood red goggles. He stared at that face. All the longing and the loss in the world was that little boy's death. He bowed his head and began to weep bitterly.

And time began to touch them once more. Darkwing felt tears come to his eyes. Somehow, for a single instant, he had seen Gosalyn lying there in the villain's arms. She was so much more asleep than dead. So was this child.

Some higher power guided his feet. He rose and went to Megavolt and sat beside him. He let his tears fall freely. He was suddenly compelled to take the hand of the child and hold it.

Ampera joined them. Slowly, each member of the fateful fight joined in the circle around Megavolt and his slain duplicate. Last of all, Negaduck came and sat among them.

All around the guardrails of the giraffes' enclosure, suited officials watched in amazement. They witnessed an unexplainable thing. Not a miracle, not a tragedy. A ghostly remembrance brought forth in the flesh as the heroes, villains, and clones wept for the death of the child who was at the same time Coulomb and Megavolt and neither one.

When Time began again, they were carried away in a blissful state of shock. Their eyes did not record the strange sight of them all huddled together, but their hearts dutifully remembered the feeling of having no walls.

Coulomb's body was carried away. Nobody knew by who or when. Negaduck and the Fearsome Four drifted off into the night to awake later, alone but complete within themselves. Ampera and Quanta simply faded into shadows and disappeared back into the bodies that gave them life. Those outside the circle who witnessed the extraordinary occurrence closest would forever swear that the two blue-feathered young women faded before their eyes as they sat in the group of mourning.

So strange and mysterious were the events of that night that those who took part can never tell you with full confidence whether or not it was only a dream. Yet if it was a dream, it was a supernatural vision. And if it truly happened…

…then it could happen again.

…end…



"Copyrat" is © Mainecoon, 2000



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