Prologue

December 21st, Winter Solstice, my birthday:

Sixteen. I can still remember when my brother turned sixteen. None of us dared to hope that he would live to see the day, but he did, surprising us all. It was such a big deal for him and we all tried to make it as special as possible. Though he had stopped being able to go to school long before that and there was no way he could get his license like many of his friends, he still looked at his sixteenth birthday as a sort of coming of age. And I guess through the influence of my brother I began to see it as that as well.

But now I am sixteen and I don’t feel a bit different than I did yesterday. Logically I knew I wouldn’t, but in a way I sort of hoped that I would. Last night I was thinking how simply marvelous it would be if I could just wake up and suddenly know all the answers to my problems, and that I would always know. If only…

I would never again have to deal with the fearful panicky feeling I felt yesterday while standing on the sea cliff with Ebony, watching the people I loved as my own family be captured by The Chosen. The worry that ate me from the inside out as I waited well hidden in the bushes for Ebony to check and see if there were in survivors would never have to consume my life again. I would always know how it would turn out. I wouldn’t have to be afraid ever again.

But then, if I always knew I could never grow, right? Tribulations only make you stronger, right? I really hope so, because I need all the strength I can get right now. The time that I have been dreading for months has come. I can’t hide myself from him any longer. He’s right here in the village. There’s no running this time.

And yet I wish I could. I wish I could just take Pride and Ebony and we would run away from this whole mess. The name Zoot would never have to ring in my ears again, nor the cries of his followers as they chant his name. I would never have to gaze upon a blue robbed figure again, nor would I have to see the piercing stare of Bray’s crystal clear blue eyes boring into my soul.

There is no escape for me this time. I must face my past, whether I’m ready or not. Bray will be waking up soon, Caribou assures me, and knowing Bray he will demand to see the tribe leader first thing. And that would be me. Eagle. The leader of the Gaians. There is no escape. None at all.