Your Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it.
When in the midst of all your fears and insanity
you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice
inside your head cries out ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin
to look at the world through new eyes.
This is your awakening!

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for happiness, safety and security
to come galloping over the next horizon.
You come to terms with the fact that he is not
Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings
(or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you and in the process a sense of serenity
is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve
of who or what you are...and that's OKAY.
(They are entitled to their own views and opinions.)
And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense of newfound confidence
is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you.
So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety and security
is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a sense of peace and contentment
is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself,
and the world around you, is a result of all the messages
and opinions that have been ingratiated into your psyche.
And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed
about how you should behave, how you should look
and how much you should weigh, what you should wear
and where you should shop and what you should drive,
how and where you should live and what you should do for a living,
and who you should sleep with, who you should marry
and what you should expect of a marriage,
the importance of having and raising children
or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are
and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing
and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything; it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing.
You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility
and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.
You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love..romantic love
and familial love. How to love, how much to give in love,
when to stop giving and when to walk away.
You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of
the man on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are
and not as you would have them to be.
You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.
You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love...you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms...
just to make you happy.
And, you learn that alone doesn't mean lonely.
And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact
that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.
You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly okay...and that it is your right to want things
and to ask for the things you want.
You learn that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.
You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with
love, kindness, sensitivity and respect
and you won't settle for less.

And, you only allow the one who cherishes you to glorify you with his touch...and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.
And you learn that your body really is your temple.
And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect.
You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water
and taking more time to exercise.
You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit
and can create doubt and fear.
So you take more time to rest.

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul.
So you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for
and that wishing for something to happen is different from
working toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success
you need direction, discipline and perseverance.

You also learn that no one can do it all alone
and it's okay to ask for help.
You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time...FEAR itself.
You learn to step right into and through your fears
because you know that whatever happens you can handle it,
and to give into fear is to give away the right to live on your terms.
And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it
living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get
what you think you deserve and that sometimes
bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people.
On these occasions you learn not to personalize things.
You learn that God isn't punishing you
or failing to answer your prayers.

And you learn to deal with evil
in its most primal stage - the ego.
You learn that negative feelings such as anger,
envy and resentment must be understood and redirected
or they will suffocate the life out of you
and poison the universe that surrounds you.
You learn to admit when you are wrong
and to build bridges instead of walls.
You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted,
things that millions of people upon earth can only dream about:
a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed...
a long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself,
by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never
betray yourself and to never ever settle
for less than your heart's desire.
And you hang a wind chime outside your window
so you can listen to the wind.
And you make it a point to keep smiling,
to keep trusting and to stay open to
every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath
and you begin to design the life you want to live
as best you can.
This is where the peace you have been looking for suddenly begins to appear and your life DOES change!