Title: Over Dinner
Author: Sheli
Rating: PG
Summary: Maria and Tess get the brilliant idea of taking the boys out to dinner…
_________________________________________________
"Wait, so you're suggesting the four of us go out to dinner?"
"Yeah."
"Just the four of us?"
"That's what I said."
"Me, you, Tess, and Kyle?"
"Uh-huh."
"Why?"
"Because, Michael, they need to feel like part of the group."
"They are part of the group."
"They don't feel that way!"
"And that's our problem?"
"Michael!"
"What?"
"Izzy and Max go out on double dates all the time."
"They're brother and sister."
"Exactly!"
"I hate to break this to you, Maria, but we're both only children."
"Hello? Do the words upcoming nuptials mean anything to you?"
"The sheriff and Amy?"
"Duh! Kyle and I will be brother and sister. And as much as that idea used to sicken me, now I'm kind of thinking it might be cool. And I'd like to get to know him *and* Tess better."
"So I have to suffer because your mom is getting married?"
"It's not suffering, Michael! We might even have fun."
"With Valenti? I doubt it."
"Come on. You can talk about guy-type things… you know, all the stuff Max and Alex are too wimpy to know about."
"Guy-type things? Exactly what is a guy-type thing?"
"I don't know… cars. And uh, wrestling. Guy things."
"Are you saying girls can't be interested in cars or wrestling? That's awfully sexist of you, Maria, what would your mother say?"
"Come on, Michael, please just do this for me?"
"You're paying."
"Actually, Jim's paying."
"Jim? You're on a first name basis now?"
"He is going to be my step-father soon, you know."
"So are you going to start calling Kyle 'bro'?"
"I just might."
"God, please don't."
"So we're going?"
"No. Why waste a perfectly good evening that could be spent right here on the couch…?"
"Because I want to go out with Kyle and Tess!"
"But…"
"No buts! Come on, don't you want me to get to know Tess better?"
"Why should I care?"
"Because she's practically family!"
"Are you and Pam Troy family?"
"No…"
"Then Tess and I aren't family. We happen to be from the same planet, that's all."
"You're hopeless! Come on, just get dressed!"
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"I'll come over tomorrow night and tell Mom I'm at Liz's…"
"What time?"
"Well, I don't know, whenever I can get out of the house – "
"No, what time is dinner?"
"Oh! Fifteen minutes. You better get changed!"
"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"
"You're kidding, right?"
"No."
"Michael, Michael, Michael. Will you ever learn?"
"I'm beginning to doubt it."
---- ---- ---- ----
"Dinner?"
"Yeah."
"Tonight?"
"Yeah."
"With Maria and Guerin?"
"Yes, that's what I said."
"Why can't we just have dinner alone?"
"Because they invited us!"
"And we didn't decline, why?"
"Because I want to go!"
"And my feelings don't matter at all?"
"No. I want to go."
"Not to sound repetitive, but… why?"
"I've lived here for months and I have one friend, not including you."
"I don't count?"
"No."
"That hurts."
"Maria actually wants to spend time with me, instead of wanting me to disappear, and I'm not going to pass that up."
"She wanted you to disappear?"
"When I first got here, yeah."
"Why must I be included?"
"Don't you want to get to know Michael better?"
"Not really…"
"You could be related one day, you know."
"Ugh, don't say things like that."
"It's true."
"How exactly would that come about?" "If Maria and Michael get married, then you and Michael will be brothers-in-law."
"Step brothers-in-law."
"Same thing…"
"Are they planning to get married anytime soon?"
"Kyle!"
"What?"
"Besides, I want to get to know Michael better, too."
"Once again… why?"
"I just want to be included, Kyle. Is that too much to ask for?"
"No. Go, be included. But why must you drag me into it?"
"Do you really want me and Maria to spend the evening with Michael?"
"What exactly are you implying?"
"Oh, come on… you can imagine it… Michael sauntering around town, a girl on each arm…"
"That image just doesn’t compute, sorry."
"Well, it's going to be reality if you don't get off your ass and get dressed soon!"
"I'm not paying."
"No, your dad is. He wants you and Maria to grow closer."
"I'm still not going."
"Yes, you are."
"No, I'm not."
"You can sleep on the bed tonight…"
"Where will you sleep?"
"On the bed…"
"What time do we leave?"
"I knew you'd come around. Now change."
"Why?"
"You look like a slob, that's why!"
"And are we trying to impress someone?"
"You're hopeless!"
"Evidently."
---- ---- ---- ----
"Let me tell you, I thought this night was gonna suck."
"Michael!"
"No, it's okay. I thought the same thing."
"Maria had to bribe me."
"Are all girls the same, or what?"
"You, too?"
"Yeah. Manipulative, aren't they?"
"Have fun living with them."
"Oh, god, you're right."
"I almost feel bad for you."
"Don't you love how they talk about us like we're not even here?"
"Oh, yeah, it's just great."
"I'm glad you invited us, Maria. It means a lot."
"No problem, Tess. I'm having a blast."
"And it looks like they are, too."
"I swear, if you walk in on her in the shower once, I'll rip you apart with my bare hands."
"Not if Tess doesn't get to me first, man."
"Yeah, now that you put it that way, I guess I don't really have to worry."
"Hey, Tess… do you think the guys know about the whole naked slumber party thing?"
"Oh, you mean the one where we – "
"You're kidding, right?"
"Sure we are."
"They're kidding, right?"
"Hey, my guess is as good as yours."
"Valenti, if you even think they –"
"You'll be the first one I call."
---- ---- ---- ----
"See, that wasn't so bad, was it?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah it was?"
"Yeah."
"But you had fun!"
"Where'd you get that idea?"
"The whole 'I'm having fun' thing may have helped."
"What was I supposed to do, tell the guy how much he was boring me?"
"Well, I had fun."
"I'm glad for you."
"We're doing it again next week."
"No."
"Naked slumber party…"
"What time?"
---- ---- ---- ----
"See, aren't you glad we did that?"
"No."
"What?"
"I said, no."
"But I thought you enjoyed it?"
"I was just being polite."
"You didn't have fun?"
"Not at all."
"Well, I did."
"That's nice."
"We decided we're doing it again next Thursday."
"No way."
"Naked sleepover…"
"When should I be ready?"


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