THE WYRM . No 1. Todays Epidsode: Oh..... Weak. After strapping on my bullet proof vest and making sure my thighs were well greased with vasleine i Left the wyrm hole and made my way to my home for the next fuck nows how many years. Bound by my cuiosity to experiance the Festival of Idocy known as Oh weak. I loaded a few slugs into my gat just incase some punk-arse-bitch tried to jack my ride. Sadly the gun remianed on saftey all week, although i did almost succombe to the temptation of blasting a few caps in the chirstians who assualted me at least ten times a day with their urban gurleia tactics . I have no problems with Religon its not for me but the wyrm never chalanges an individuals right to worship. The problem i have is with the aggresive recuritment tactics . These religo-vultures use to try and convert people to their way of thinking. Activily seeking out people who look weak, and lost and trying to badger them into joing a religion is in this wrigglers opinion very shady, Love your god, but dont try to suck up to your god, if there is a god hes a smart fellow and your pathetic attempts to kiss his arse will just make you look like a syconpohantic lump of turd or worse yet an austalian. Music is a big part of the oh weak festivities and during the week we were subjected to all kinds of sonic vibrations in the form of various local and national dj's and bands. Some was good. most resemabled a small shriveld lump of dookie. Whatever you music tastes The darling rock bitch Julia deans and fur patrol (Shes one fur id like to patrol!) were a higlight and the hard rock stylings of the D4 and Various hip hop, regaae stuff that i also enjoyed. It was not as good a previous years but all things considered it was better than the homestyle vasectomy i had over the summer with a rutsy coathanger and the used band aid i found in the gutter outside my flat , more about that later. Books, Manuals, books about manuals and manuals about books. One thing about uni is the cost of books is enormus. The powers that be will be quick to talk about discounts and subsidys but really - a hundred bucks for a book?.. Where were these trees grown?..... on the moon?!, Anyhow the lines were as usual ridiulouss and i spent a good hour at campus copy and half an hour at bennets... but hey guess it could have been worse. My usual Tactic of cutting into line by taking off my clothes and jumping up and down freneitcaly didint work to well.. Apaprantly no one wants to see the wyrms worm. Hence the wyrm is a soliatry invertabrate. Sob. :( Gripe: Celebrity cricket match i was told, i made my way eagarly to the field hoping for some entertainment. There certainly werenbt any celebraities playing (the third cousing of a guy who once shock hands with an all black does not count) and it looked more like golf with about as much excitment and a lot less skill. Also we had the pleasure of market days and of course the club day whitch I found enormus fun.The previous statment is a complete pile of bollocks. Still if your into sipping your Caffe latte with the future residients of ponsoby road in the 29 degree heat or tons of sparkly shit dangeling preciously from other sparkly shit then this was defiantly for you. I was imensely amused by stilt walkers in shiny costumes, nice girls but surley they have no shame, students of the performing arts - need I say more. Lets not forget the funky dancing ladies who girated for our viewing pleasure and that crew of refugees from woodstock who spent all week promotoing peace and brotherhood. Sorry my hippies friends, Saddam is not afraid of you. All in all it wasent worth getting outta bed for, but it was better than paul holmes covering bizkit. So oh weak is done. Yay. Time to get down to the studying.. (The thing you payed thousands upon thousands of dollars for remember?). Finnaly I'd like to leave you with one of my many brilliant thaughts. A guy playing a record is not a DJ, he is simply a guy playing a record. -Wyrm