AINT NO I IN TEAM Greetings Skylarkers and Scallywags. In my first year of university, one things has had its finger up my bum longer than any other, i call this wretched beast THE GROUP PROJECT. Here are some random and messy thaughts about group work and why it sucks a huge lemon. Group projects are designed to cause trouble, after all there is a certain point ,where achieving good grades, stops being thought of as the result of good teaching and large amounts of study and starts to look like the paper is a 'joke' paper (a time filling, space clogging piece of academic Styrofoam.) And nobody wants that, especially in fields of study that already have a reputation for being 'popcorn' (tastes good, No substance)subjects and especially if some poor sod has worked very hard on the content. So what better way to slip up the top students (Often weak and Socially inept) by dragging them into the slop with the mouth breathing masses. And better yet, no one will realize the true reason why you have worked a group project(s) into the schedule. On the flip-side for the grunters out there, at university due to what I can only assume was an accident in the admissions department involving a bottle of scotch and several explosions, a group project allows an opportunity to pounce upon the nearest nerd and use either your sexuality, brawn or social status to milk them for all their worth. But hark, as I am momentarily distracted by a pair of silky blondes with considerable assets, I hear plaintive cries in the air. "Nay Sir Wyrm, thou hast gotten thyself entangled in a hideous web of lies"... oh really? Ideally a group situation provides an opportunity for individuals to share their knowledge and skills their individual efforts combining to form a mass of collective intellect capable of taking on any task and solving any problem. Meanwhile in the real world, this ideal concept of groupwork crumbles under the inept and lazy efforts of the majority of the group and some sad soul, usually me, will end up doing all the work. Again the whining of the enlightened liberal banshees pounds upon my ears. "Well Wyrm, you obviously don’t have the leadership and interpersonal skills needed to work effectively within a group. You could always complain, do something about it, don’t shoulder more than your share." I shun such comments, for in recognizing them I make these words even more redundant than they already are. Within the group dynamic you will usually get someone who is doing more than there share of the workload, this person is known as the 'packhorse' they will usually harbor dastardly thoughts of torturing and violently murdering the other members of the group. Another common component of groups is the 'dreamer' , this person spends most of their time talking about frivolous things (who spewed last night, when the game is on, what other people are wearing)and generally trying to distract the group members from the task at hand. Other common components of a group situation are the middle aged nazi and the almighty introvert. The middle aged nazi believes, because he/she is older than the other members of the group, that their opinion is worth more. They will bludgeon you with their argument , no matter how flawed. Great rifts are created when a young 'upstart' stands their ground against these frumpy fascists. Older folk need to realize that having lived longer than someone does not automatically make you wiser it simply means you were provided with more opportunities to gather wisdom, Unfortunately the gaps in this wisdom are all to often apparent to the younger generation. The introverts are possibly the worst because even if they have wonderful skills/ideas/opinions they don’t tend to communicate them. Staying silent will not keep you from looking the fool, your silence makes you look the fool (even if you are not). It's one thing to be shy, to be silent is another altogether and If you fit this bill please make efforts to change. Your life will suck if you stay too intorverted for too long. Final comments, Working with friends can be good or bad. On one hand communication tends to be free and easy, relationships are already strong and there is potential for high quality teamwork. Unfortunately working with your mates may well turn into an impromptu social event and cause a lot of off task behavior.. Be wary the double edged sword my son. Till next time. Wisdom: This took 7 minutes to write (can u tell?) Web: www.geocities.com/thewyrmhole