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Giant Squid Sex Scandal Rocks Hogwarts
Former students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry may recall the school's giant squid as an object of curiosity and school pride. At the school's insistence, the Wizarding World has always believed this exotic beast to be harmless.
BUT IS IT?
Sources inside the Hogwarts have recently raised allegations against the giant squid, claiming that the creature is at the center of a bizarre sexual fetish ring.
"It's awful," one brave student, who wishes to remain anonymous, told the Quibbler, "tentacles everywhere--doing things you wouldn't believe!"
The Quibbler expects that a full investigation of these allegations by the Ministry of Magic will be forthcoming.