7/1/2008 8:09 AM-

Had gotten myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed a few minutes ago. Before I got myself dressed, I then spent time in my bedroom, wearing nothing but my diaper to be “comfortable”, & I mutely played with some of my baby toys. I also read a couple of my picture storybooks, & I did atypical autistic “self-rocking”, sitting there mutely on my bed.

This morning, I am experiencing a lot of physical “aching all over”.

7/1/2008 8:22 AM-

Today is a “self-imposed” “No Television Watching Day”, with the exception of what I have to do for Derry Community Television this afternoon.

7/1/2008 1:26 PM-

This morning, Nate had me running around in my Ute, grocery shopping & to purchase Sub Sandwiches for Lunch. I then took a nap, because I was physically not feeling well. After waking Up, I had my 3^rd “poop” of the day today. I am not sure why, but I make huge amounts of pee-pee while “laying down”.

Anyway, I have to stop @ the Kelley Library, & then drive up to Derry to the Derry Community Television CATV Studio where I volunteer.

7/2/2008 7:56 AM-

Washing my bed sheets, because they are filled with my own pee-pee. Yesterday evening, I “hardly ate anything”, because I was “feeling sick”, & still “aching” all over my body”.

@ night, & during naps, I experience a huge amount of uncontrollable pee-pee wetting & “Disuria” pain. Disuria is “difficulty & pain” while making pee-pee. I suspect this is due to the effect of Lexapro on my body. Maybe there is “too much of this drug in my body”.

Anyway, I think I need to “eat”.

7/2/2008 8:24 AM-

Had 2 slices of Instant French Toast. Still “aching all over my body”. I did take some Acetaminophen pain reliever.

This afternoon, I do have an “appointment” to see my Social Worker/Counselor, Ms. Fisher up in Derry @ 1:00 PM.

7/2/2008 9:41 AM-

I have been spending my morning, mutely hugging my Sesame Street “Elmo” cuddle friend. Feeling less achy over my entire body.

7/2/2008 5:43 PM-

Have been watching the evening news on WHDH-TV, Channel 7 (NBC Network). I guess that yesterday, over in Jerusalem, a Palestinian Muslim Terrorist used a “Front-End Loader” Machine to “kill” Jews. L

Supper earlier, was “Pancakes” again.

7/2/2008 5:51 PM-

Just washing more dirty laundry for my Dad.

7/2/2008 6:04 PM-

Today in the mail, I received my R.S.V.P. from www.aane.org, to this year’s Asperger’s Adults “conference”, which is held @ Bentley College in Waltham, MA.

7/2/2008 6:23 PM-

Diarrhea! L

Either I am “plugged up”, or I am “making a mess”…

7/2/2008 6:31 PM-

More rain & another Thunderstorm.

Still watching the evening news, & the “forest fires” in California are getting worse.

7/2/2008 6:52 PM-

There was a news report, that by this time next year, “General Motors”, one of America’s 3 major automobile/vehicle manufacturers could go 100% “Bankrupt”.

7/2/2008 7:29 PM-

Had just videotaped bird behavior in the backyard, after watching an episode of the old “Speed Racer” cartoon from the 1960’s. Not sure why, but I have been feeling a bit sad this afternoon & evening.

7/2/2008 7:51 PM-

Just took my daily Lexapro & Lipitor medications.

I was of course just thinking about this upcoming Independence Day Holiday Weekend & I “have no plans of my own” as to activities for this weekend. Being autistic, I can not “plan ahead”, & “others” have to do that mental task for me. Next week, I do have an www.aane.org “social event” in Danvers, MA on the 8^th, & I have to videotape the “Children’s Bedtime Story hour” @ the Taylor Library in East Derry for Derry Community Television.

With Petrol prices so high, I may just only take (1) trip to Hampton Beach, Hampton, NH & Odiorne Point in Rye, NH, “after” Labor Day in September, to videotape Seagull & Comerant behavior. This year, the only Agricultural Fairs I may go to, are simply in Deerfield, NH & Sandwich, NH.

www.deerfieldfair.org

Anyway, all over America, the Summer Tourist Season is “disappearing”, because we can no longer afford to drive “long distances”.

7/3/2008 8:49 AM-

I think around 3:30 AM this morning, the electrical power “failed”. Unfortunately “in the dark”, Dad “fell” in his bedroom & bumped his head, getting up & going potty. I finally woke back up again @ 8:00 AM, & I got cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day.

7/3/2008 9:24 AM-

Just being mute & quiet, & waiting for Nate to return home from going out grocery shopping for Dad.

7/3/2008 9:51 AM-

Started washing more dirty laundry for Dad. Also, I have the 60-LED rechargeable work light “recharged”, in case we lose the electrical power @ night again.

This morning, I have watched an episode of the old “Supermarionation” Kid-Vid TV Show from the 1960’s, “Captain Scarlet”, which was about the Mysterons duplicating a Biological Weapons Researcher, & using her to “dump” a test tube full of “lethal” bacteria into Lake Mead in Arizona @ Hoover Dam, to “exterminate” the population of Los Angeles, California.

Unfortunately, some of the “Terrorism Act Scenarios” in this 40+ year old Kid-Vid TV Show, do seem “plausible”, in “real life”.

Of course, I am not “amused”.

7/3/2008 10:48 AM-

Had a “Deviled” Ham Sandwich for Lunch.

Interesting trivia fact: “Marcus Antonius” had Roman Senator “Cicero” assassinated.

7/3/2008 6:00 PM-

Another thunderstorm is ready to start.

7/4/2008 9:11 AM-

Independence Day Holiday

Had gotten myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day an hour ago. Outside, it is raining.

7/4/2008 9:20 AM-

Earlier, I did watch the Weather Report, & I guess in the “scrolling” news headlines, the “Neo-Conservatives” & their “Christian Religious Right” allies, are “beating their drums”, to “start” another war against another Muslim Nation, “Iran”. Both the “Neo-Conservatives”, & the “Christian Religious Right” have a “Xenophobic Hatred” of Muslims, as “fanatical”, as the “Islamic Fundamentalists”.

Yesterday evening, there was a “new” documentary “Miniseries” on WGBH-TV, Channel 2 (PBS) out of Boston, Massachusetts, called “The War of the World”, hosted by a Harvard University Professor, who puts forth the premise, that “Xenophobic Ethnic, Racial, & Religious Hatred”, has been the “root cause” of warfare across this planet for the past 100 years.

Petty hatreds & rivalries between Ethnic, Racial, & Religious Groups has “always been prevalent” through human history, but I myself think, that “Modernization, Industrialization, & Mass Media” have turned “small-scale” conflicts, into “Mass Ethnic Cleansing (Genocide) Bloodbaths” across this planet for the past Century. Strangely, it seems like I remember my old Wentworth Institute History Professor, “George Freimarck” putting out a “wild idea” like this, when I had him for the Course, “The Authoritarian/Totalitarian State”, back in 1983.

Lately, since “King Bush” sent our military into Iraq, “for his own ‘personal’ military glory”, the “Yizidi’s & Christians”, who have lived in Iraq for 2,000 years, are being “Ethnically Cleansed” via “Genocide”, by both “Sunni & Shia” Muslims, whipped up into “Xenophobic Hatred” by their own “Religious Leaders”, for “Political Reasons”.

7/5/2008 8:57 AM-

Had gotten cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. Earlier, I videotaped more bird behavior in our garden.

Yesterday, my Asperger’s Syndrome contact, “Jim”, out in Ohio called to say “hello” & relay a bit of information for me. I guess it was the first time I heard his “live” voice.

7/5/2008 9:02 AM-

I do find myself thinking about Mom not being around. When Nate & I were children, she packed the Ice Chest with stuff, & Dad drove all of us up to Wellington State Park on Newfound Lake in Bristol here in New Hampshire on Summer Saturdays, to have a picnic, & go swimming. That was decades ago, & after Mom’s “mind” started deteriorating from Hyperthyroidism Psychosis, we never went back there as a family. Plus there were Saturday trips over to Hampton Beach on the Atlantic Ocean., ect.

7/5/2008 4:06 PM-

I guess that I have been mute & quiet all day long. Nate had me go out grocery shopping for Dad this morning, & Lunch was a home-made Egg Salad Sandwich. Afterwards, I took a nap. When I woke up, I watched an episode of the old “Space Ghost” superhero cartoon on my portable DVD player/viewer, & an episode of “XENA: Warrior Princess”.

All afternoon, it has been cloudy, & perhaps it may rain.

Earlier today, just before my nap, I “diapered” my huggable cuddle friend, “Grr-Grr” Bear, & while hugging him, & asked God to please protect little children from bad people. While napping, & hugging “Grr-Grr” Bear, I dreamed about being locked-away in an “Institution”.

7/5/2008 5:33 PM-

Needed to “withdraw” into my bedroom, & hug one of my plush cuddle friends for a while. I also read some more of the physics book, “The Elegant Universe”, by Physicist, Brian Greene. I guess that Nate is upstairs, using the Internet on “his” computer. I will simply wait until Monday, to access the Internet, over @ the Kelley Library.

7/5/2008 6:43 PM-

No rain this afternoon, & the Sun is out again.

7/6/2008 2:51 PM-

Had woken up from my naptime, asking God to protect little children. This morning, I allowed Reverend Ferguson @ my church, to borrow my DVD copy of the PBS television program, “Kingdom of David: The Saga of the Israelites”, to see if he can use it for the 7^th grade Sunday School Class, & the “Confirmation” Class in the upcoming Sunday School Year.

Anyway, this afternoon, I am feeling sad. Perhaps it is because @ my age of 50, for the past 42 years, I have never had any of what one would “describe” as “friends” come over to visit me. My own childhood memories from decades ago, are of no other children coming over to play with me & my toys. Either I was “alone”, as an autistic developmentally disabled child, or only I played with my younger brother & his toys, so long ago.

7/6/2008 4:44 PM-

Nate sent me out to purchase Cheeseburgers for Supper. Earlier, Sunday Dinner was “Frozen” Chicken Pie.

7/6/2008 4:56 PM-

Only watching Part IV of the documentary, “Rome: Power & Glory” on my computer. Anyway, @ this time of day on a Sunday, there is only “garbage” on broadcast television.

7/6/2008 5:14 PM-

Well, this is another holiday ending, & it has just been Dad, Nate, & I “alone by ourselves”, like it always has been, for the past 42 years. My “late” Mom’s side of the family, are “not welcome here”, since, they “never wanted us around anyway”. Even as a child, I felt that my Mom’s relatives never wanted anything to do with me, because I “physically existed”. Also, I guess that Dad’s side of the family have really hardly ever have visited these past 42 years since moving to Salem, New Hampshire, since Mom, with her “problems”, just “drove them all away for good”.

Even an autistic developmentally disabled person like myself is supposed to have some exposure to having an “Extended Family”, but I do not. My “nearest” relatives, Forrest Wood & his wife, & his younger brothers, Lorne & John Wood are hundreds of miles away and live in poverty, & I who also am living in poverty, can not drive there to visit them, because I could never pay the huge cost of Petrol to even get there, since I was last up there 7 years ago.

7/6/2008 6:19 PM-

Had decided to play a bit with my “Wooden Railroad” toy for the evening on the floor here in the Den. & that “Uncle” of mine down in Tewksbury, Massachusetts told me a month ago, that my nearly 4 year-old Cousin “Ryan” could not put something like this together to “play with?

7/6/2008 7:12 PM-

Had just mowed the area of the lawn around the patio & under the wheelchair ramp under the porch for Dad.

Anyway, there has not been a backyard picnic here @ our house in decades, since before we “moved here” to Salem, NH 42 years ago. The only picnic/barbecue I have been to this year, was only the one for Asperger’s Syndrome adults last month.

7/7/2008 8:17 PM-

After getting myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day, I started the automatic swimming pool bottom vacuum. Anyway, just after 10:00 AM, I have to go out to an appointment to my own Psychiatrist, Dr. D. up in Derry.

7/7/2008 8:29 PM-

I guess that it is time for the “Mental Retard”, “Me”, to mutely play with my “Wooden Railroad” toy here in the downstairs Den room for a while, until I have to “go out “ in my Ute up to Derry.

7/7/2008 8:44 PM-

I am going to need to “clear more space” here in the Den, which is still a “junk storage area”.

Being “alone by myself”, I feel happier, especially when mutely playing with my own children’s toys, which I do not want to “share with others”.J

7/7/2008 9:42 PM-

Had left a message on Nate’s “Voice Mail”, telling him, that in a short time, I have to go out to an appointment, & have to leave Dad “by himself” for a while, until he returns home.

Not sure what “else” I will do today, but maybe I will drop a couple of my resumes off @ a couple of “local” high tech employers, “as a joke”, since for the past (7) years, I have been “blacklisted” out of any kind of “gainful employment”, since the Terrorist Attacks of September 11, 2001. J

7/7/2008 4:19 PM-

Supper was Macaroni & Cheese.

Earlier this afternoon, I did spend time & the Kelley Library, reading my e-mail.

7/7/2008 7:21 PM-

I did go swimming in our backyard swimming pool to “cool off”. I simply “swam alone”.

I am still feeling sad, & I still need to “withdraw inward into myself” more. Playing with my children’s toys, alone in my bedroom, seems preferable, to being around other people.

7/7/2008 7:49 PM-

My bowels uncontrollably suddenly “let go”, & I had a massive poopy “mess” to clean up, & I re-diapered myself. Anyway, how about a “big laugh” @ the “50 year-old baby”?

7/8/2008 8:38 AM-

Yesterday evening before I went to sleep with my soft plush cuddle friend, “Woggy” Froggy, I mutely played with a bunch of my baby toys, while watching the documentary, “Chased By Dinosaurs”, with Zoologist Nigel Marvin. It did help alleviate some of my “normal autistic “depression” I experience @ times.

Anyway, I am cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day.

7/8/2008 9:19 AM-

I guess that one of my fingers got in front of the lens. I have been mutely playing with my “Wooden Railway” toy again, alone by myself as an autistic adult.

7/8/2008 9:41 AM-

I only play “concretely” with my toys. Being autistic, I am unable to “imagine” any scenario stories with them. The “Diesel Locomotive” only pulls its (2) “Passenger Coaches”, & the “Diesel Switching Engine” pulls “Freight Cars”, and a “Caboose” in the rear around the wooden trackway.

7/8/2008 10:14 AM-

Although a “Wooden Railroad” Toy is not as “realistic” as say, an “HO-Scale” electric-powered toy train, @ least, it does not need “electricity” to be able to play with. Suprisingly, “Wooden Railroad” Toys are “popular among some “adult” Model Railroaders, who themselves create “huge” train layouts in their Dens or Cellars with them. Besides “track”, I also have quite a few wooden train engines & different types of cars.

7/8/2008 12:08 PM-

Not sure why, but I “withdrew into my bedroom, & I mutely played for a long time with a spinning baby toy I have. I also hugged “Grr-Grr” Bear plush cuddle friend for a while.

Today, I am not sure if the Asperger’s Adults social group will meet this evening in Danvers. It might get cancelled.

Anyway, I am just feeling sad, & I mostly need to “withdraw” into myself, just to “keep my sanity”, as an autistic adult.

7/9/2008 7:52 AM-

Some of my earlier journal/blog entries are “screwed up”, as to the AM/PM suffix on the date & time.

Anyway, I am cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. Earlier this morning before getting out of bed, I mutely played with my 2 infant’s “Rattle Balls”, & my “Bear-Bear/Doggy Sliding Beads” toys. I also mutely played with my “Busy Box”, attached to the head board of my bed. I only prefer to “play mutely by myself” all alone as an autistic adult.

7/9/2008 7:59 AM-

I need to mutely hug & cuddle my small “Muumi” the “Moomin Troll” huggable “friend” for a while.

7/9/2008 10:29 AM-

Had started washing more dirty laundry this morning for Dad, & I had gone out in my Ute, grocery shopping for Dad. I did experience a bit of “rage”, while I had to clear out the kitchen sink after I returned home a few minutes ago. Well, if I do not do it, it will never get done.L

7/9/2008 11:16 AM-

Have been “pooping a lot” this morning, & “barely” making it to the Potty Chair. No Diarrhea, but just uncontrollable “urge” fecal incontinence, along with my normal “urge” urinary incontinence.

7/9/2008 11:54 AM-

Have been mutely playing with my “Wooden Railroad” toy again.

7/9/2008 1:41 PM-

Had returned from going to the Bank. While out, I “blew” $60.00¢ on a pair of shoes for myself, that are “needed” @ the J.C. Penney Department Store @ the Mall @ Rockingham Park. I only purchase “new” shoes, when the ones I have been wearing, are ready to “rot off my feet”. J I also stopped @ the Walgreen’s Pharmacy in the shopping plaza on the corner of the Veteran’s Memorial Parkway & NH Route 28 here in town to purchase adult diapers & bedwetter pads for myself.

7/9/2008 2:05 PM-

Have gone back to mutely playing alone by myself, with my “Wooden Railway” toy. @ least, mutely playing with a toy, is better than plopping myself in front of the television, for an autistic adult like myself with Asperger’s Syndrome.

7/9/2008 2:50 PM-

Feeling a bit happier, being alone by myself & mutely playing with my “Wooden Railroad” toy. For a supposedly “unsophisticated” toy railroad, that does not need electrical power of any kind to “play with”, I was able to use my autistic visual processing to use, to create a relatively complex “compact” railroad “layout” here on the floor of the downstairs Den room.

& here is (5) of the (7) wooden trains I hitched together & placed on the railroad “layout” I created today.

In an era of “fancy” video games & electronic toys, for children & adults with Autism Spectrum developmental disabilities, “old-fashioned” toys such as a “Wooden Railroad”, & “LEGO Blocks”, “big” Metal Tonka & Buddy-L Construction Trucks, & ERTL Diecast Tractors & Matchbox & Hot Wheels Cars/Trucks, are “better choices” for “playthings” for “male” children & adults with Autism (@ all cognitive levels), than “fancy electronic toys & games”.

Why?

Because they can be “physically manipulated” in an autistic child’s hands, for tactile sensations/feedback. Plus they are “open-ended”, as far as “what to do with them”. With electronic toys & games, the “outcome” of the play session with them, is “steered”, by whoever created the electronic toy or game, to a “set fixed outcome”. But, with “old-fashioned” toys, the “agenda”, & design, & scenario outcome of playing with them, is “totally up to whatever is inside the Autistic child’s or adult’s mind”, & there is “less “frustration”, upon the part of the autistic child or adult, when “things do not go according to plan”, while playing with the toy(s).

7/9/2008 4:01 PM-

Supper was Shepard’s Pie again.

7/9/2008 6:15 PM-

Swimming in the backyard swimming pool got “torpedoed” this evening, due to a Thunderstorm.

Here I am a “medically” incontinent 50 year-old autistic adult, & I think, that damn “Diaper Fetish” clothes “suck”. @ that “United Kingdom Supplier”, www.cosyndry.com, one can purchase this “Blue Romper/Matching Toddler-Style Shirt” in “adult sizes”. L

Being a “grey-haired” “geezer”, I would look “ridiculous” wearing a darn “infant style” shoulder strap adult-sized “Romper” around the house.

Plus these damn “infant style” t-shirts would “suck”.L

But, the darn “Plastic PVC Incontinence Pants”, may be “useful”.

7/9/2008 6:42 PM-

There is still an “uproar” over the “temporary” house trailers they supplied to “displaced” families from Hurricane Katrina, which occurred 3 years ago, over them being “contaminated”, as “new” from the factory, in a news report, a few minutes ago on television.

7/9/2008 7:15 PM-

Started washing the “final” dirty laundry load of the day in the washing machine for Dad.

7/10/2008 8:28 AM-

This morning, after taking my daily bathtub shower, I “made a pee-pee” onto the bathroom floor. Of course, I “cleaned it up. Earlier this morning, I woke up crying a little bit, from a “frightening bad dream”, all about “evil bad ladies”, showing where their pee-pee comes from. Spent time lying in my pee-pee soaked diaper & bedpad, hugging “Goo-Gee” Bear, , & in an infantile, & soft “child-like” voice, I told “Goo-Gee” Bear that I was “very frightened”, & over & over again, I told “Goo-Gee” Bear friend, that “Me a Baby…Me just widdle baby…Me only good widdle boy…Please God, protect all the widdle children everywhere…Me hate bad growed-ups! No touch! No Touch! Naah! Naah!…”

“Goo-Gee” Bears face became “very wet” from my copius infantile childlike tears.

Me just widdle baby!

7/10/2008 11:18 AM-

Was just out in my Ute to take our household trash/recyclables away to the Refuse Collection Center on Shannon Road for my Dad. I also stopped @ my church, to talk to the church secretary to see what is going on, as far as plans for the 103^rd “Old Home Day” Community Celebration coming up the Saturday after Labor Day there in Pelham.

Earlier, I need to hug “Mummi Troll” plush friend for a while, before I went out in my Ute.

Anyway, I made myself a Tuna Sandwich for Lunch & had “Corn Chips” with it.

7/10/2008 11:32 AM-

Experiencing thoughts & feelings, about not being allowed to do nothing but “play “ mutely with my toys, “alone by myself” in my bedroom. Long ago, Mom “trained me” to “mostly stay in my room” as “ongoing punishment”, to “control me” & “keep me safe” (except from her). Even today, as a 50 year old autistic adult, I “rigidly” confine myself in my bedroom for hours @ a time, to “never be a bad little boy”, & “hide myself away” from the “rest of the world”.

7/10/2008 2:07 PM-

Had just “packed” my “Diaper Bag”, for going out in a short time, 1^st to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail, & then to go up to the Taylor Library to videotape a “Children’s Story Time” this evening @ the Taylor Library in East Derry for Derry Community Television, where I volunteer.

7/11/2008 8:45 AM-

Well, I guess that the Taylor Library “cancelled” yesterday evenings “Children’s Story time, & did not notify Mrs. Ellingwood @ Derry CTV, to contact me to “not waste Petrol”, getting there & finding out what was going on.

Darn!!!!!

This morning, I had to tinker with the automatic swimming pool bottom vacuuming device to get it working. I did have a small “temper tantrum” though.

I should start washing more dirty laundry for Dad this morning.

7/11/2008 9:06 AM-

Was left with “no information”, as to whether the dishes, ect. in the dishwashing machine are clean or not. Will have to wait until Nate returns home.

7/11/2008 9:30 AM-

Nate did leave me information, to purchase Fish Sandwiches for Dad, & I, & Him.

7/11/2008 3:01 PM-

Dad did tell me this morning, that the dishes in the dishwasher machine were “clean”, & I put them all away for him. I then went out in my Ute to purchase Lunch. After Lunch, I mowed the Lawn for Dad, & I was just in the swimming pool, “cooling off”, after working in the yard for him. Next, I will be going to the Ritz Camera Photography Shop, to develop 4 rolls of 35mm film, one of them, mine. Then I will be going to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail, & then Nate needs me to purchase a few more grocery items @ the Shaw’s Supermarket across town.

Later on, I will spend more time playing mutely with my “Wooden Railroad” toy train set.

7/11/2008 7:27 PM-

Supper was “Pancakes” again. I did go to the library to read & answer e-mail messages from my contacts in the Asperger’s/Autism Disability Community. I also got Nate’s “latest” 35mm photographs “developed” & placed on a CD-ROM disk for him. I also stopped @ the FYE CD/DVD Store in the Mall @ Rockingham Park, which was 2 stores down from where Ritz Camera & Photography is located. Interesting, that I was able to find the “STARGATE: INFINITY” Animated Cartoon Series that was not on very long on TV a few years ago in 2003.

7/14/2008 7:23 AM-

Almost time for me to go out in my Ute up to Londonderry to my appointment to see Dr. Egenolf. Anyway, in the last couple of days, I have not had much time to write here in my journal.

7/14/2008 6:56 PM-

Just spending time watching the evening National/International News, & I guess in the last couple days or so, (9) more of our combat soldiers are coming home from Afghanistan in “Glad Bags”. Of course, those “damn” “GOD HATES FAGS!!!!!” people from Topeka, Kansas are going to “desecrate” some of their Military Funerals.

Anyway, Dr. Egenolf this morning put me on “Ciprofloxicin” 250 mg, because my bladder is infected again. After seeing her, I stopped @ ford of Londonderry’s Repair Shop, because my Ute’s right-front tire is “losing air”, & I have had to stuff quarters into the tire inflation machines @ a couple local Petrol Stations several times in the last couple weeks. There was a small “carpenter’s screw” stuck through the treads of that tire, which got “patched up” for $14.95¢. I of course, then stopped @ my Bank, to transfer funds into my chequing account to pay my Blue Cross/Blue Shield “managed” PFFS Medicare Plan Insurance.

Of course, Nate wants me to “pay my share” of the cost of the “new” wireless Internet connected laptop computer to the tune of $350.00¢. I will have to “transfer” more funds from my Savings Account into my Chequing account to “cover that bill”, which Nate “racked-up” on his Sears-Roebuck Inc. Store Credit Card. L

Well, he “owes me” Internet time on it, to download NASA Space Probe Images.

7/14/2008 7:38 PM-

Just remembered I took this photograph, with the $9.00¢ fixed-focus digital camera I have. “Cook’s” is one of the “last” “House Trailer Developments” here in Salem, New Hampshire. It is just “south” of the old “vacated” “local” Coca-Cola Bottling Company, that “went out of business” years ago.

& here is the “derelict” Coca-Cola Bottling Company on NH Route 28 here in Salem, New Hampshire.

This is the Walmart Supercenter Department Store here in Salem, New Hampshire, about a mile or so “north” of the “derelict” Coca-Cola Bottling Company.

7/14/2008 7:47 PM-

I should make a note of that yesterday evening, Nate invited his friends over for a backyard picnic here @ our house. This is the 1^st backyard picnic in decades, since my deceased Mom became mentally-ill after we moved here to Salem, New Hampshire 42 years ago. I did find it enjoyable, & Dad was happy, which was good, despite the constant neuropathy pain in his legs.

While Mom was “alive”, we could not even have “friends over”, & now that is changing. J

7/14/2008 7:55 PM-

Not sure, but I think, that today’s “Editorial Cartoon” in the Boston Globe Newspaper, is all about the “issue” of school children “taking powerful prescription drugs”, for various “ailments”.

7/14/2008 9:13 PM-

Have been mutely playing with my wooden railroad toy for a while.

7/15/2008 8:30 AM-

Nate is out @ a doctor’s appointment, & I am cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. Dad is “sleeping in” as usual. Right now, I am washing more dirty laundry for Dad, since he really can hardly walk any more to get downstairs to use the washing machine/clothes dryer.

7/15/2008 9:28 AM-

Have been mutely playing with my wooden model railroad again.

7/15/2008 10:02 AM-

Had just brought downstairs more dirty laundry to wash for Dad, after I changed my “poopy” diaper.

7/15/2008 10:34 AM-

Mutely playing with my wooden railroad has made me happy this morning.

7/15/2008 12:07 PM-

Had just arrived back home from doing a bit of grocery shopping for Dad & Nate.

Later on today, I have to be @ the Derry Community Television CATV Studio, where I volunteer.

7/16/2008 8:19 AM-

As usual, my own “motor clumsiness” got me a little injury. I put a 1” “scratch into my bald head”, via one of the corners of the carpentry workbench in the cellar, “reaching” for a couple items of dirty laundry to put into the washing machine, while on my knees. L

Now it is time for me to “cough up” $350.00¢, to “pay my share” of that darn Wireless Internet connected laptop computer Nate purchased for the both of us to use.

7/16/2008 8:48 AM-

Well, @ least that “bill” is now “paid”. I “keep my word”, when it comes to assisting my own brother. He also “keeps his word” with me, when I need assistance, with “organizational” issues, my autistic mind can not do very well, & other things too.

Right now, with nothing but trashy talk shows on the telly, I have decided to watch one of my “Care Bears” DVD’s on my computer, while I wait for more laundry to dry, so I can have a pair of socks to wear.

7/16/2008 5:48 PM-

Supper was just home-made Potato Salad with eggs. While out, I of course mailed that “bill” off @ the Post Office, & I went to the Kelley Library, but the computers were all “booked” for a while. I then drove over to the “Toys R’ Us” Store in Nashua, to look for “more wooden track”, ect. for my wooden railroad toy, to “expand” what I can build for a “layout” on the Den floor. Anyway, what I have on the floor now, is just one of a possible # of track layout configurations I can build & play with for a while.

Earlier today, I felt happy, mutely sitting here @ my computer, watching the “Care Bears”.

7/16/2008 6:29 PM-

Time to watch the evening National/International News on WHDH-TV, Channel 7 (NBC).

7/16/2008 6:31 PM-

Prices on everything are skyrocketing, especially food, due to energy costs.

7/16/2008 6:41 PM-

More “negations” with the country of Iran, regarding their getting ready to build nuclear weapons (to use on Israel).

7/16/2008 7:42 PM-

Time for another 250 mg Ciprofloxacin tablet. My Bladder Infection is clearing up ok, but, still I have a slight amount of “straining” & uncontrollable “urgency” during Micturation.

7/17/2008 9:31 AM-

Had just taken the household trash/recyclables to the Refuse Collection Center on Shannon Road for Dad, after I got myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day.

7/17/2008 11:39 AM-

Nate had sent me out in my Ute, to purchase Cheeseburgers for Lunch. Supper tonight will be “Pancakes” again.

With food costs soaring out of control, Pancakes are “still cheap” to make & eat.

7/17/2008 2:23 PM-

Had gone out to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail. I also stopped @ the Walgreen’s Pharmacy here in town to purchase another package of “Super Large” disposable bed pads. After arriving back home, I have been playing mutely with my wooden railroad toy again.

7/17/2008 3:10 PM-

This is one wooden train “overpass” I came up with, visually, out of my mind yesterday evening.

& “another” “loop of wooden track”, I created visually out of my mind, using parts out of “another” $49.99¢ “set” from the Toys R’ Us “Imaginarium” wooden railway series.

Pardon the “picture quality” from my $9.00¢ fixed-focus digital camera. This is one of the wooden railway engines positioned, like it is traveling across the Suspension Bridge/Viaduct section of this particular “layout” configuration I have been creating here in the Den @ home.

7/17/2008 4:26 PM-

I myself think we are eating “Pancakes” too often.

Here are (3) more photographs of my wooden railroad toy from different angles.

7/17/2008 4:53 PM-

I feel happy, mutely playing with my wooden railroad. I guess, as an autistic adult, I can “get into such a hobby as this, quite obsessively”.

Being autistic, I play with my wooden railroad, “concretely”, & try to use the trains for their “exact” purpose, as seen by myself of what “real” railroad trains do.

7/17/2008 5:16 PM-

The news is on. I will watch it upstairs in the Parlour on Dad’s HDTV.

7/17/2008 7:50 PM-

Ended up watching “Episode #1” of the old Sci-Fi TV Show, “Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea” here on my computer. I am thinking, that I have a lot of old TV shows on DVD. I do think that they were better-made than the “garbage” on the television networks now.

7/18/2008 9:22 AM-

Nate’s 2004 Crysler PT Cruiser’s left front tire was “flat”, & I had to install the “temporary” Doughnut Spare Tire on for him, while he is “out” for the morning, driving Dad’s 2008 Dodge Caliber Sport Sedan. It is “very hot” outside, but it did not take me very long to “change his tire”, so that later on, he can go get his flat tire “fixed”.

Nate did ask me to drive over to “Mike’s Red Barn Deli”, for Sub Sandwiches for Lunch for the (3) of us.

7/18/2008 4:51 PM-

Just found out via the telephone from Dr. Egenolf’s office, that the Ciprofloxacin was ineffective against the strain of bacteria in my bladder. Have to go out to the Rite Aid Pharmacy for “something else”.

“Charles Darwin Strikes Again”…L

Just an example of “Micro-Evolution, in a “single” Hominid Primate, “Me”…

7/19/2008 8:38 PM-

Just got cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day, & had breakfast, & taken my next dosage of Nitrofuran Monohyd Macro Antibiotic, that Dr. Egenolf prescribed for me yesterday.

I have of course decided to “rebuild” my wooden railroad toy into a “new” configuration, which will allow the door to the garage room from the den room to be used.

7/19/2008 9:24 PM-

Yesterday evening, I went up to the Cinema Megaplex on NH Route 28 in Derry. The movie I went to watch, was “Batman: The Dark Knight”. Inthis latest Batman film, Batman’s “nemesis”, “The Joker”, is a psychotic “Urban Terrorist”, who guns down his own henchmen, assassinates political figures, & “blows up stuff”, just for the “thrill of it”. Also, after robbing banks (& the Mafia), he does not spend all the “loot” he stole, “he just burns it”, via dousing it with Petrol & enjoys “watching money burn”. Just like Usama Bin Laden, “The Joker”, “does not give a shit”, about how many “innocent people” “get slaughtered” during his (& his henchmen’s) “terror” rampages.

7/20/2008 2:21 AM-

Lunch was Seafood Salad Nate purchased @ the Shaw’s Supermarket this morning. Afterwards, I took a nap. Experienced “nightmare images” of my Mom & Grandmother Edith (Mom’s Mom), “locked in combat” with each other. Also experienced “nightmare images” of Mom “tying my wrists & ankles to my crib” decades ago, as a preschooler, while forcing me to wear & use cloth diapers to go pee & poop. Also had a nightmare about Mom tying my wrists & ankles, & waist to my potty chair, & her forcing me to endure enema & suppository punishments to “make me “go poop”, “when she wanted me to go poop”.

Anyway, I have woken up “frightened”, that “bad things will happen” again.

7/19/2008 7:29 PM-

Earlier, after my naptime, I went out in my Ute over to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail. I guess my Asperger’s/Autism contact, “Keven” out in Sacramento, CA is having problems with his computer. Sounds like he is having *.dll “Device Driver” problems on the laptop computer he uses to access his e-mail & the Internet.

Anyway, here is my “new” track layout configuration (still in process) here in the Den. I did watch the news on WHDH-TV, Channel 7 (NBC Network) a short time ago. The Iraqis “want America out of their country”, preferably “now”. Of course I “agree” with them. Our military is “not a Police Force”. We should have “handed” Iraq back to the Iraqi People, back in the Autumn of 2003. The War should just have been, “get rid of Dictator, Saddam Hussein”, & then “immediately” hand that country “back to the Iraqi People”, not play the “Colonialist/Imperialist Expansionism/Adventurism Game”.

Of course, our “political bungling” over there, has “made more Islamic Terrorists”, who “Hate America’s Living Guts”. Usama Bin Laden, that “Terrorist Warlord”, has “won” the latest “Iraq War”. We sure as Hell have not, despite “claims” to the contrary.

7/20/2008 4:34 PM-

Just arrived home from being up @2 the Robert Frost Farm National Historic Site, videotaping Derry, NH Town historian, “Richard Holmes”, telling stories about the Town of Derry, for Derry community Television where I volunteer.

Earlier, I had a nap, before doing that, & having Sunday Dinner of Chicken Pie with Vegetables, after arriving home from church before 11:00 AM this morning. Here @ my computer desk in the Den, I have the “backup” “Master DVD Disk” of today’s 9:30 AM Summer Sunday Worship Service. I am thinking about making a couple of copies, & sending them to my Asperger’s contacts, Jim, Keven, & Stefan.

7/20/2008 4:47 PM-

Decided to watch the old Kid-Vid Sci-Fi TV show, “Stingray”, that was done using marionette puppets. In the episode, “The Golden Sea”, the “evil” “Titan”, of course hatches another “plot” to get rid of the submarine, “Stingray” & its crew.

But, we know, that the “evil” “Titan”, & his plot to destroy the submarine, “Stingray”, “fails”.

7/20/2008 5:46 PM-

I need to mutely play with my wooden railroad toy again, while I wait for the evening news to come on.

7/21/2008 8:43 AM-

Had added needed sanitary chemicals to the swimming pool in the backyard, after getting myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. This morning, Nate is driving Dad up to Derry for another doctor’s appointment. Since my bed sheets are soaked in pee-pee, I have to wash them.

July 21, 2008

2:56 PM-

Checked my own “mail”, & my American Express Charge Card “bill” arrived. All I “owe them” is $130.00¢. One thing I think is “looney”, is that people rack up thousands or tens of thousands of dollars in “Credit Card Debt”, that they can not possibly “pay off”.

Earlier, I was out to withdraw a bit of cash, for tomorrow, when I go down to Malden, MA, to another Asperger’s Syndrome “social event” for adults, via the www.aane.org organization. Of course on Saturday coming up, is the “main” www.aane.org “conference” for adults with Asperger’s Syndrome that I will be attending.

3:10 PM-

Had to close the windows on Dad’s 2008 Dodge Caliber Sedan, because it has started to rain. The sky is dark, & I can hear “thunder”, which I really do not like @ all.

3:24 PM-

The sky has just “opened up”, with a torrential “downpour”. I am of course here in the Den, & I am about ready to mutely play more with my wooden railroad toy.

July 23, 2008

8:36 AM-

Just got myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. Only had 2 slices of Toast for Breakfast, & took my daily multivitamin tablet, & the antibiotic Dr. Egenolf prescribed for the bladder infection in my body.

All last night, it rained.

Anyway, I should say, that the video shoot over @ the Taylor Library yesterday afternoon went well. The children gathered, got to see an Australian “Goanna”, a “Sugar Glider”, a “White Tree Frog”, a “Macaw”, a small non-poisionous “Python”, & a “Wallaby” Kangaroo. I then on my way down to Malden, MA, to attend the www.aane.org North Shore Asperger’s Adult Social Group, dropped the video equipment back home, & then drove down there. It met @ a small Italian Eatery, not far from the Malden Center MBTA “Orange” Line Station. This was so that Those Asperger’s adults attending, who could not “drive”, could get to the gathering. Anyway, plenty of food & conversation for 20 of us adults with Asperger’s Syndrome for the evening. I did not arrive back home, until around 9:30 PM.

8:55 AM-

I just need “Muumi Troll” to hug & cuddle, while “self-rocking” here in my chair @ my computer desk here in the Den room.

9:02 AM-

Why are there “bad places” all over, which sell “very bad” & “evil” television DVD’s, about where pee-pee & poo-poo “come from” on growed-ups on their bodies? Why are there other growed-ups who “hide themselves away – just like me” & “try to be little babies again”, just like me? Did their mommies “Diaper Discipline” & “Bad Touch” where the pee-pee & poo-poo come from, the way my Mommie did to me, & also “did not love them”, & “care for them correctly”, when they were babies & toddlers too?

9:17 AM-

I wish, that I were a “baby” again, 24/7. I with, that I could just be kept “locked away”, & confined to an “adult-sized” hospital-type “Steel” High-Railed “Crib” 24 hours a day for the rest of my adult life, with nothing but baby toys & plush huggables, & only have “other growed-ups” only come around to “bottle feed me”, & “change me”, whenever my diapers are soiled with pee-pee & poo-poo. I would “accept” being “locked away” for the rest of my adult life, in a room, “locked” from the outside, & just “lay there in a crib”, & just suckle from formula bottles, & wet, & poop, & sleep, & play with my baby toys & huggable plush animals as my only “cognitive” activities. I would readily “permanently” give up all capacity for speech & language, & just simply be “mute & silent”, or only “make unintelligible noises” to express “wants”, or whether I am sick & do not “feel good”.

4:31 PM-

Well, it looks like “Asperger’s/Autism” person, Me, has gotten into “today’s” edition of the Manchester Union Leader Newspaper. As you can see, I am in the backround, “hyperfocusing” on the movements of “Presenter”, “Derek Small”, following him with the video camera on a “tripod mount”. After the Presentation, “Derek Small” asked me, if the Wildlife Encounters Zoo can have a copy of the “final” finished TV show, after I get back to the Derry CTV Studio, next Tuesday, the 29^th, & edit the footage, & add all the needed titles/graphics, & burn a “Master” broadcast DVD disk.

4:37 PM-

Well, I should “shut-down” my computer, & take it “off the AC Power Grid”, because there is another “Thunderstorm” outside, with a torrential “downpour”. L

5:56 PM-

Had made sure a short time ago, to “make out” a cheque to pay my American Express Charge Card “bill”. I carry “very little” credit card “debt”. Being on a very low SSDI yearly income, I can not just “rack up” much of any debt on my American Express Charge Card.

6:49 PM-

Had to change my diaper for the 4^th time today a few minutes ago. There was news report on the NBC Network, stating, that with the economy the way it is now, the “Middle Class” is “starting to “collapse” economically. The result could end-up being the “Wealthy Elite”, & “Everybody Else”, a 2-tiered social class “structure”. After all, I “fell” out of the Middle Class”, “permanently”, the day Brooks Automation, Inc. “blew me out the door” back in October of 2001, after the 9/11 Terrorist Attacks, for “Being Gay”, & my “then undiagnosed” Asperger’s Syndrome Developmental Disability.

July 24, 2008

9:10 AM-

Had gotten myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day, & had breakfast. I also put my previous day’s “dirty/wet” disposable dydees in the trash. Last night was not a good night for sleeping. Lots of Thunder & Lightning. L I ended-up having a “very bad dream” about the Iranian Ayatollah “blessing” “Nuclear Hate Bombs” before launch, & one “going off” here over the High School here in Salem, & “vaporizing” most of my town. In my dream, I was “instantly flash-fried into ashes”. L

July 25, 2008

8:38 AM-

The Sun is finally out, after a few days of rain. Right now, I am mutely playing with one of my baby toys.

The movements & sounds of the little beads inside & the internal “spinning” parts are very calming & comforting to look @ & listen to. Especially, for long periods of time.

Earlier, I had to pump water out of the swimming pool to lower the water level, & I haqd to start the automatic pool bottom vacuuming device.

8:54 AM-

I again find myself wishing, that I could be physically crippled & “locked away” & confined for the rest of my adult life in an “adult-sized” hospital sized “steel” crib & cognitively treated, as if I only had a cognitive mental age of 13 months old. I would be happy, just having nurse/caregivers, simply bottle-feeding me, changing my diapers, whenever they are wet & poopy, & only having nothing but my blankies, some plush stuffed animals, & a bunch of baby toys there in my crib, as my only cognitive “stimulation”.

In “real life”, that is what my Mom did to me, during her “Diaper Discipline Sessions” on my, that she did almost on a “daily basis” for almost 3 years, from when I was 2 to 5 years old. I really did have nothing but a couple of plush stuffed animals, & some baby toys there in the crib & the playpen she “physically tied me down into”, while wearing nothing but my cloth diapers & plastic panties, & Mom “securely pinned” my diaper to my t-shirt, & All I could do, while I was “Diaper Disciplined” (& sexually fondled/molested by my Mom), was simply pee & poop in my diaper like a baby. Mom also made me “bottle feed”, to insure, that while “diaper disciplined”, I had “runny diarrhea poop” in my diaper, which “crept up my back”, while laying on my back, tied into the crib, & “made a mess”. I was made to lay in my mess, or sit in it, all “wet & smelly”, & when asked by my Mom, I had to say that I was “Widdle Baby”, because I had a lot of “potty accidents”, & “making a mess” all over myself, my wooden potty chair, & the “floor” around my potty chair, “during” my “very long” toileting/cleanliness “learning process”, lasting until I was about to start Kindergarten.

Another aspect of Mom’s “Diaper Discipline” used on me, was that she “treated me”, as if I were a “little girl’s” Baby Dolly Friend.

I “suspect”, that @ times, my Mom was experiencing DID (Disassociative Identity Disorder) cognitive personality “shifts”, & what Psychiatrists call “Child Alters/Littles” were in “control” of my Mom, & she “did not know how to care for me” (& my deceased infant brother, David), when one or more of her “Child Alters/Littles” were in control of her “physical” body.

Anyway, I have come to realize, & accept, that I am an autistic developmentally disabled Asperger’s Syndrome adult, who is both “Gay”, & an “Adult Baby”.

10:40 AM-

Had to go out in my Ute a short time ago, & purchase Cheeseburgers for Lunch for Dad, Nate, & I.

July 25, 2008 (Continued)

3:31 PM-

Nate had to be out this afternoon to a doctors appointment. The swimming pool had to be “filled” with more water, due to a malfunction in the water circulation system. Nate fixed the “master” valve assembly (hopefully).

6:31 PM-

Time to watch the evening news. Home “foreclosures” are @ “record levels”, & families are getting “tossed out onto the street”.

6:37 PM-

The Presidential candidates, “McCain & Obama” are hauling each other “over the carpet”, over the Iraq War.

Also in the news, a “Quantas Airlines” Boeing Model 747 passenger jet, had a part of the fuselage “rip open”, & it had to make an “emergency landing” in Manila, Philippines. Just another “very old airplane”, suffering a “catastrophic failure”, due to age.

6:54 PM-

Interesting! Rock Music Star, “Mick Jaeger” turns 65 years old “tomorrow”. “Hey guy, welcome to the Depend Diaper Generation!!!!!” J

July 27, 2008

2:58 PM-

I just woke up from my usual Sunday afternoon nap time, & Nate wants me to go out to purchase Sub Sandwiches for Supper. Sunday Dinner Earlier was “frozen” Turkey Pie, Boiled Potatoes, & “Summer” Squash.

This naptime, I had no “bad dream”. I had gentle, loving “happy thoughts”, napping in my bed, hugging “Woggy” Froggie plush friend, & clutching one of my baby rattles.

4:51 PM-

After Supper, I have been watching “Episode #1” of the “Doctor Who” Sci-Fi adventure, “Genesis of the Daleks”. It is all about “Fascism”, “Eugenics”, & “Genocide/Ethnic Cleansing”. It is one of my “favorite” “Doctor Who” adventures.

July 28, 2008

8:48 AM-

Like it or not, I have to “cash” the darn “Tax Rebate” cheque I received from “Uncle Sam”, to use on stuff like “adult disposable diapers”, ect.

10:37 AM-

Had gone to the Bank, & the Shaw’s Supermarket for Nate & Dad, & then the Walgreen’s Pharmacy, to purchase “adult disposable diapers”. I then mowed the lawn in the areas that Dad’s riding lawnmower can not reach. J

Nate is out this morning, for medical tests, & I have to make sure Dad is ok, & had Lunch.

11:22 AM-

(1)   Corned Beef & Swiss Cheese Sandwich for Lunch. Dad is ok.

2:15 PM-

Got myself cleaned up & re-diapered & dressed to go out in my Ute to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail. I finished mowing the lawn for Dad, which is good.

July 28, 2008 (Continued)

7:20 PM-

I was just thinking about how yesterday, a 58 year-old “unemployed” man in Knoxville, Tennessee, up & “shot up” a Unitarian-Universalist Church. That “Lone Wolf Terrorist”, deliberately went “out of his way” to “try & slaughter as many LGBT people as he could”. 2 dead, 5 wounded, & a whole bunch of children, trying to perform a church pageant play got “terrorized”.

The “message” that hate-filled person got out, was “DIE!!!!! YOU GODLESS SODOMITE SUBHUMAN FILTH!!!!!”

Here of course is a picture of the “Hate-Filled Kook” who “murdered” 2 parishoners in that Unitarian Church.

Anyway, I “wonder” when somebody like that will storm into the church I belong to, & go “gunning for LGBT people – to slaughter them…in the name of God”. God does not hate anybody. It is just “Us Hominid Primates”, who are “doing the hating”, and ascribing hate, as being “a part of God”.

This was me Saturday evening here @ my computer in the downstairs Den room after I returned home from the www.aane.org Asperger’s Syndrome Adult’s Conference @ Bentley College in Waltham, Massachusetts. I spent most of my time with “Randall Currie”, whom I had not seen in quite a long time. The 2 of us talked a lot together, about issues related to Asperger’s Syndrome/HFA & Employment. I did tell him, that “State” Vocational Rehabilitation Agencies, have a “piss-poor” track record, of serving us autistic adults with Asperger’s Syndrome/HFA, because we can “almost pass” for being “normal”.

Yesterday morning, it was just 12 year-old Joshua Clark & I, doing the “live” video broadcast “feed” to the main Pelham CTV Studio, from the Rear Choir Loft of my church. Of course, this is a “still” capture of the “Opening Credits”, broadcast “live” over Pelham Community Television @ the beginning of every Sunday’s worship Service “broadcast”.

Pardon the poor screen capture with the $9.00¢digital fixed-focus camera I have connected to my computer. This is of course, Reverend William Ferguson @ my church.

Earlier today, after Nate had the CT Scan of his Kidneys & Bladder, I guess he purchased this small pillow for my lower back to rest on. I guess it sums up feelings I have towards my “only living brother”. As time goes on, we seem to be “getting emotionally closer”. As a “Gay” developmentally-disabled autistic adult, in the future, when our Dad finally passes away, all I will have is Nate, to be my “immediate family”.

7:53 PM-

Just have to “remind myself”, that it is almost time to take my “daily” Lexapro & Lipitor medications.

July 29, 2008

9:41 AM-

After getting myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day, I hauled the household trash/recyclables away to the Refuse Collection Center on Shannon Road for Dad. I then drove across town on “back roads”, to the Hess Petrol Station @ the intersection of NH Route 28 & Lake Street.& purchased $20.00¢ worth of petrol. I then drove over to the Walmart Supercenter Department Store, & I went into the “Infants” Department, & @ the “front checkout counter”, purchased a Playtex “Diaper Genie Diaper Pail”, which will work for “disposing” of my wet (& sometimes poopy) adult disposable diapers.

11:14 AM-

Nate had me go out in my Ute for Milk & cheese, to make Spaghetti & Cheese for Supper tonight. Plus he had me purchase Cheeseburgers from the “Cholesterol King” Burger Joint on Route 28 here in town.

11:23 AM-

My schedule this afternoon & into the evening, is to 1^st stop @ the Kelley Library to read my e-mail. Then drive to Hudson, NH, 3 towns west of Salem where I live to www.costumesofnashua.com to “order” my 2^nd “Fursuit Costume” to debut @ Pelham, NH’s “103^rd Old Home Day” Community Celebration. Then spend time @ Derry CTV, editing the footage of the 2 events I recently videotaped the previous week. Lastly, I have to videotape @ MacGregor Park in downtown Derry, NH, a performance by the “New England Shakespere Festival Players”, of another one of Shakespere’s “Comedies”.

July 30, 2008

8:17 AM-

The “Diaper Genie” style “Diaper Pail” does work with “Adult-Sized Disposable Diapers”. After getting myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day, I “disposed” of my yesterday’s “dirty diapers”.

Yesterday afternoon, @ www.costumesofmashua.com in Hudson here in New Hampshire, I managed to obtain my “2^nd Fursuit Mascot Costume” for a “discount”, due to it being “used” & in “very good condition” for only $350.00¢. It is a “White Bunny Rabbit”, with a “Pink Tummy”. The “List Price” now on their website, is $499.99¢.

I guess that “Ate Up” the darn “Tax Rebate Cheque”. After all, “King George W. Bush” wants us to “blow the money” anyway.

Well, my other Fursuit Character, “Sheriff George Wolf” now has a “Deputy”, and I guess he will be called “Deputy Sniffer Bunny”.

8:49 AM-

Had to “re-glue” a part back onto the wooden viaduct part of my wooden model railroad, because it accidentally “broke off”.

I find myself thinking again about that “Church Worship Service Shooting” this past Sunday morning. I guess that “Operation Rescue’s” founder, “Randall Terry” is calling the “Gunman”, a “Christian Hero”, Reverend Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas is also calling the “Gunman” a “Christian Hero” too. L

7:30 PM-

Ended up having an autistic temper-tantrum, regarding Nate “suddenly” going out somewhere around Supper Time. I do not like “unpredictability” in people, even my own brother.L

Anyway, I did go out in my Ute over to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail. While over there, I read on the www.abcnews.com website, a news article, regarding the handing “lifetime” “Immigration Court Judgeships”, to “Personal King Bush Loyalists”, in “violation” of the US Constitution. This in itself is an “Impeachment Offense”.

King Bush has been doing “exactly” a lot of the stuff, that Britain’s “King George III” was doing, prior to this country “declaring its independence”, back in 1776. “King George W. Bush”, is about as “corrupt”, as Dictator “Baby Doc Duvalier” of Haiti.

For the past 7 years, all “King George W. Bush” has done, day after day, is nothing but scheme about “who the Hell can I ‘Fuck-Over Today’…”. Disabled people like me & all the other Asperger’s/HFA adults I know? He surely does not “give a shit”, that 90% of us with Asperger’s Syndrome are either unemployed or underemployed, ect.

The only reason why “King Bush” wanted to be “Supreme ruler of America”, was to “ruthlessly destroy” everyone who “ever pissed him off”, or “got in his way”.

He also only wanted to “Rule America”, to “loot the American People” & “pocket the money”, & to “Start world War III”, to make all his “buddies” in the Right-Wing Fascist Televangelist Ministries “Kiss His Arse”, to “fulfill their prophecies” of a “Rapture” of “Christian Fundamentalists Only”, & “Damn all other Christians to Everlasting Hellfire” in “Armageddon”.

July 31, 2008

8:32 AM-

Just got myself cleaned up, diapered & dressed for the day. I emptied out my “diaper pail”, & I disposed of my yesterday’s dirty diapers in the trash.

Being autistic, I have no “plans” for the day. IN the morning, I just “sit here @ my computer”, waiting for Nate to “order me to do something for Him & Dad.

8:39 AM-

Oh! By the way, there is no “Rapture” expoused “anywhere” in the Holy Bible. It is an “old” “Millerite” “false belief”, that got “incorporated” into the Pentecostal & Christian Fundamentalist “Religious Revival Movement” of the latter part of the 19^th Century. It is also a part of the “Dispensationalist Interpretation” of reading & understanding Scripture.

Of course, “Dispensationalism” is part of the “Gospel According to Me” of all of the Televangelists spewing “Heresy” all the time to tens of millions of Christians over the “Mass Media” all over this planet, along with their own Xenophobic “predjudices”.

Another interesting piece of history, was that the “Millerite Movements” theology, ended up in Nanjing, China, & through a “Christian Missionary Convert”, & “failed” Confucian Scholar, ignited the “Taiping Rebellion”, that lasted over a decade, & “fatally politically/militarily weakened” the Chinese Imperial Government, in the aftermath of the Western Powers “forcing” the Opium/Illegal Drug Trade” onto the Chinese Imperial Government. The result, was that the Western Powers (including the United States), carved up China into “Spheres of Influence” – “Occupation Colonies”, that finally got “overthrown”, by “Mao Tze Dong’s Communist Movement” in 1949, which “reunified” China.

9:52 AM-

Nate’s “Tomatoes”, growing out of a flowerpot on the Porch are doing well. I also noticed that the Summer Squash plant in a flowerpot on the Porch, has “re-flowered”.

A couple of Nate’s “Herbal Plants” on the landing there on the wheelchair ramp, where it turns 90° to go up to the Porch.

3:57 PM-

Supper was Baked Bay Scallops & Boiled Potatoes that Nate cooked. I myself went swimming earlier for the 1^st time in 3 weeks, since I was being treated for a bladder infection. I have also watched DVD’s on my portable DVD player. I watched episodes of

“Neon Genesis Evangelion”, “Technoman”, “Samurai 7”, “Hawaii Five-O”, & “Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea”. Tonight before bedtime, I will watch “Care Bears”, & “Teddy Ruxpin”.

Well, I guess that it is time to go to the Kelley Library to read my e-mail again…

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