For personal use and select distribution only © March 1998 by S.L. Snyder

THE SPIRITS APPROVE
by S. L. Snyder

Timeline: February 1873


Sully and Cloud Dancing were on Daniel's land (the old Palmer Creek Reservation Land) hunting. It seemed like old times and they could almost forget the deaths of the Cheyenne at Washita and their recent problems with the Army. They were finally both free to come and go.

"Things are well with you and Dr. Mike?" asked Cloud Dancing.

"Yeh....the hurt over losing the baby and me being in hidin' for so long is finally healing. She is an amazing woman," Sully replied. "And how are things between you and Dorothy?"

"Good. It is nice that she uses her paper to help the white man understand about the People. When we were heading for the Powder River, she burned her book so the soldiers would not see what she wrote about the northern Indian lands. I would like her to write the book again. It was a good legend of the People."

"Have ya talked to her about it?"

"Not yet. I will." Cloud Dancing paused, then, "I have prayed to the spirits about my feelings for Dorothy. I did not want Snow Bird's spirit to be unhappy."

"And what have the spirits said?"

"That it is okay to find happiness with Dorothy. Working together to help our peoples to understand each other will be a good thing. It is good to be with Dorothy. She fills a part of my heart where Snow Bird is not. When we were having the troubles, Dorothy was ready to give up her life here and live with me in the northern lands. It was how I knew her spirit and mine could be together."

"Michaela says Dorothy is happy in her decision to allow her feelings for you to show. She had been afraid of what the town would think, but she no longer cares because she decided her happiness was important. It was good that Loren seems to have accepted your relationship....it has helped with the people in town. She smiles a lot these days."

"As do I."


The whole family was together for dinner. Colleen and Andrew had come out from town.

"When Cloud Dancing and I were huntin' today, he said he was going to ask Dorothy to write her book again...you know, the one she burned because of the soldiers." said Sully.

"That's wonderful," Michaela said. "She had told me about it and I believe it was a very good story about the Cheyenne and Cloud Dancing. I hope she does it."

"Do you think Miss Dorothy and Cloud Dancing will get married?" Brian asked.

"It's hard to say, Brian," answered Michaela. "While the town seems to have accepted their feelings for each other, I'm not sure they'll accept a marriage. But at this point in their lives and with all that has happened, the most important thing is that they are happy and enjoy being with each other."


"How is Cloud Dancing?" Michaela asked Sully as they cuddled in their bed.

"He's good. He said he prayed to the spirits about Dorothy and the spirits said it is okay," Sully answered.

"When I see him these days, he looks more at peace than he has anytime since Washita. I have been afraid that his heart wouldn't heal. And he has been good for Dorothy. She, too, is very happy." Michaela looked into Sully's eyes, "And she's not the only one that's happy. To have you home with me and to have all the children near, it's the best it's ever been."

Sully kissed Michaela, "Yes, my heartsong, it is the best so far."


Dorothy left town early in the morning. She had gotten a picnic lunch from Grace and was heading up to spend the day with Cloud Dancing. She hadn't seen him for almost a week and missed him very much. She couldn't wait to arrive at their meeting place and urged her horse forward to a trot. As she was coming down the path, she saw him waiting for her. She felt her heart jump at the sight of him.

Cloud Dancing smiled as Dorothy drew near. As she stopped her horse, he reached up to help her down. They stood for a moment, looking into each other's eyes. They drew close and kissed.

"I have missed you," Cloud Dancing said.

"And I've missed you. I couldn't wait to get here today. Although it's only been a week, it seems likes a month since I last saw you."

"Let us go to the meadow," Cloud Dancing said. They mounted their horses and headed up the trail. They reached the small meadow on Daniel's land where Cloud Dancing had set up his teepee. They dismounted and settled down on the skins he had spread in front of the teepee.

"You have been well?" he asked Dorothy.

"Yes....and you?"

"Yes. I am at peace with the things that have happened. I am glad I can be here near the ones I love. Sully, Michaela, the children and most of all, you. I see your smile in the sun and your eyes in the blue sky."

Dorothy smiled, "I love you too. I thank you for making me this happy."

They sat there, holding hands, content to be with each other. No words were needed.


The morning past quickly as Dorothy and Cloud Dancing engaged in small talk about their friends, the town, the Indians in the north. When lunchtime came, Dorothy got the picnic lunch and they enjoyed Grace's preparations.

After lunch, they took a walk.

"Dorothy, I have a favor to ask of you," said Cloud Dancing.

"Yes?" Dorothy replied.

"I would like you to write the book again. It was a good story about the People and I would like to see it published."

"Oh, Cloud Dancing, are you serious?" she asked, thrilled that he wanted this of her.

"Yes. I was sad that you had to burn it and if you can write it again, it would be very good."

Dorothy turned into his arms with tears in her eyes.

"Why do you cry?" he asked.

"Because you believe in me. Because you trust me to again write the truth about the Indians. I will try again, but you will have to help me. My notes were part of what I burned. I may remember a lot, but I'm sure I won't remember everything."

"Then we will do it together."


As the late afternoon came, they returned to the teepee and the horses.

"I should go now so that I can get back to town before dark," Dorothy said.

"Yes. I will ride with you for a ways."

They headed back toward town and rode in silence. They reached their meeting place, where they would part.

"Dorothy, the next time you come, I would like you to stay a few days. You can stay in the teepee and I will guard it from the outside. The time together is never long enough and it would be good to be together for awhile. We can talk about the book."

Dorothy smiled, "Yes, I will. I will try to come back in a few days. I will come up to the meadow."

"I will meet you. I will know when you are coming."

They kissed goodbye and parted.


Michaela was giving Dorothy a physical, as she had monthly since the operation.

"Michaela?"

"Yes?"

"I saw Cloud Dancing yesterday. He asked me to stay up there a few days the next time I come up. He said I would sleep inside his teepee and he would sleep outside."

"And how do you feel about that?"

"I said I would."

"But...?"

"I think I want him to sleep inside the teepee. But I don't know how to tell him that. I don't mean I necessarily want to be intimate, but I would like to be close to him. And Michaela, if something were to happen......well......I don't know if he knows about my operation. He may not think me desirable if he sees what's left."

"Dorothy, I don't think Cloud Dancing cares about that. He's like Sully. It wouldn't make a difference to Sully, and I don't believe it will to Cloud Dancing. But you might be more comfortable if you tell him about it if you think anything is going to happen."

"You're right, Michaela. Thank you."


Dorothy put out the paper and closed up the office. She put a sign on the door saying she would be gone for a few days, and after telling Michaela she was leaving, Dorothy rode out of town and headed up to the meadow. When she reached their meeting place, Cloud Dancing was waiting there.

"How did you know I was coming?" she asked.

He smiled, "The spirits told me."

They turned and headed for the meadow.

"Are you staying awhile?" Cloud Dancing asked.

"Yes." Dorothy replied.

Cloud Dancing smiled, "I am glad."

They reached the meadow and put Dorothy's things in the teepee. Then Cloud Dancing handed Dorothy something wrapped in a blanket.

"What's this?" she asked.

"It is a gift I made for you. It is for the being in you that is writing the book about the People."

Dorothy opened it and found a beautiful, soft buckskin Indian dress and knee high moccasins. She ran her hands over the softness, "Oh, Cloud Dancing, it's beautiful. May I put them on?"

"Yes, please." He held up the flap of the teepee so she could go in to change. He put the flap down and went to off-saddle her horse.

Dorothy changed into the buckskins. She was amazed at how comfortable they were.

As she came out of the teepee, Cloud Dancing was standing there watching her. "You are beautiful. I am proud to love you," he said.

Dorothy walked up to Cloud Dancing and kissed him. "It is a beautiful dress. I thank you very much and I too am proud to love you."

Dorothy and Cloud Dancing sat down and started discussing the book. Dorothy told Cloud Dancing the things she remembered and he told her the things she forgot. Dorothy knew then that she could and would re-write the book.

They walked up to a bluff as evening drew near to watch the sun set. They sat with their arms around each other, happy in their togetherness. In the dusk, they walked back down to the meadow. Cloud Dancing made Dorothy an Indian style dinner, which she enjoyed very much.

After dinner, sitting around the fire, they heard thunder and saw lightening in the distance.

"Is it going to rain tonight?" Dorothy asked Cloud Dancing.

"It may," he replied.

"You can't sleep outside if it rains. I don't mind sharing the teepee with you. Is that okay?'

"Yes. I thank you."


Later that night the rains came. Dorothy loved the sounds the rain made on the teepee. She could hear the soft breathing of Cloud Dancing on the other side of the teepee. She felt more at peace than she had felt in a long time. She was thankful for meeting and getting to know such a remarkable man.

It rained most of the next day. Dorothy and Cloud Dancing sat together in the teepee, discussing their thoughts and feelings. Dorothy knew she wanted Cloud Dancing to know about her operation.

"Cloud Dancing?"

"Yes?"

"There's something I need to tell you."

"Yes?"

"A few years ago, Michaela found a lump here," she said, pointing to the approximate area the lump had been. "She determined it might be a cancer....do you know about cancer?"

"Yes."

"She felt that the safest way to treat it, to save my life, was to remove the lump. To do that, a part of me had to be removed also." Dorothy looked down at her folded hands in her lap. "She had to remove.....my right breast."

Dorothy saw Cloud Dancing's hand move over to cover hers.

"I do not love you for parts of your body. It is the spirit that makes you, you that I love. I am sorry for your pain and I wish I had been there to hold your hand and care for you."

With tears streaming down her face, Dorothy looked up at Cloud Dancing with gratitude and love for the caring. He reached over and wiped the tears away, then kissed her.

"I would like to share myself with you, Dorothy. Will you allow that?"

"What do you mean by sharing?" Dorothy asked in a whisper.

"It is what the white man calls making love."

Dorothy looked in Cloud Dancing's face and saw all the love he had for her. She nodded her head yes. Cloud Dancing reached up and took the hair pins out of her hair and helped her red hair cascade over her shoulders. He removed his clothing, then gently removed hers. He guided her down to the blankets. He moved his hand to cover the right side of her chest, the scar, with a tender caress. "You are a very beautiful woman, Dorothy, and I love you," he said as he kissed her.

That night was a glorious one for both of them. Dorothy had never known the tenderness that Cloud Dancing exhibited. Her husband had taken what he wanted and walked away from her bed and any pleasure she felt was accidental. Cloud Dancing truly shared himself with her and she experienced new and exciting things happening to her body. He was a very considerate lover, taking pains to give her pleasure, the same as she gave him.

Dorothy woke up in Cloud Dancing's arms. She could see the sun streaming in the teepee. She realized she still had no clothes on and that it did not bother her. Her white hand lay on his bronze chest and she marveled at the contrast. Then she noticed the tiny scars in a circle on each side of his chest and she wondered about them.

She stirred a little and felt his arms tighten.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked.

"Yes. Better than I have in a long time. Did you?"

"Yes."

"Cloud Dancing, what are these scars on your chest? she asked as she touched the scars.

"They are from the sundance ceremony, which I told you about for the book. It is a test of manhood," he replied.

"Was it painful?"

"Part of the ceremony is willing yourself to go beyond the pain, I don't remember feeling the hurt."

Dorothy rubbed her hand on his scars and then she kissed them. Cloud Dancing smiled, "If there was pain, your kiss would heal it." Dorothy laughed.

Cloud Dancing moved over Dorothy and kissed her. He moved his hands down her body, caressing her left breast and her right chest. He moved to kiss the scar on her chest. Dorothy thrilled at his tenderness. She moved her kisses all over his face and down to his chest. As he entered her, she knew she had never felt this way before and she knew she never wanted to give Cloud Dancing up.


"Dorothy?" Cloud Dancing said.

"Yes?"

"In my tribe, when a man and woman share themselves, they promise themselves to each other. I know we can never marry in the white man's world, but I am asking you if you want to have a sharing ceremony with me. It is done with just the man and woman."

"Oh, yes, Cloud Dancing, yes. I would be honored!"


When they rose and dressed, they had their sharing ceremony. Promising themselves to each other for always. Cloud Dancing taught Dorothy the Indian words to say to become his wife in an Indian wedding ceremony. Dorothy felt truly married, although she could never tell anyone except Michaela and Sully about it. But she also knew that was enough. To know this man loved her and wanted her and promised himself to her was enough.

As evening fell, they again walked up to the bluff to watch the sunset. Their silhouettes showed against the sun, the Medicine Man and his bride.


The End

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