Hello People,

I’m in my prison cell in High Desert State Penitentiary, I’m in what you call the ice box (Cell 250).  I bow my head and pray to our Lord, as tears stain my cheeks as the holidays pass, and I’m rotting because of my ignorance and immaturity with emotions, and bad choices in the “Belly of the Beast.”  A lonely soldier searching for a meaning in this life I live.  I’m 30 years old, and a father to a beautiful boy by the name of Royal, who changed my life, and soon my old ways of life born April 7th, 2007.  I haven’t seen him since he was three weeks old.  He’s in Foster care, I love you son.  His Mother a good woman just young and made some real bad choices (Love you Royale).  Please just listen to me vent, I’m reaching out to all that know me and have tried to know me, this is where I’m at in life.

I have been in the system since I was eleven.  Family gave me up, I was beat, molested and robbed, not only to live a young life, but of love, and robbed of getting to learn what it was like to have someone you love and cherish, that bond you share with that person you love.  Anyway, my pont is no matter what, just remember God loves us, we have to strive forward and better ourselves.  You know when sometimes the old you comes out, and you feel bad or guilty—its because we have grown up and bettered our ways of thinking, and the way we choose to live around or with.  We have free will.  Yes!  We are weak to the influences of society at times, better out there than in here, around lies and hatred, and Fake Love AND Respect.  Every kind of monster in society including myself (now a Monster of Love).  We have to love ourselves and push to better our hearts, minds, bodies, and soul.  To shine wherever we go.  To be real with ourselves, and to love thy neighbor and the enemy, treat others how you want to be treated...period.

I’m no Guru, I just want to be heard, because I’m no Monster.  I’m a young man changing, looking for success for myself.  So my son Royal can have what I didn’t.  Love and good family morals and upbringing.

Thank you God Bless.

Ronald David Cook
a.k.a. Joker