Title: Characterization
Author: sibling
Contact: sibling@fanfiction.net
Rated: G
Disclaimer: I have no claim on any of the characters mentioned, whether Joss Whedon’s or Marvel’s or DC Comics’. They belong to their creators, who have however denied them their inalienable rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness much too often.
Summary: Xander and Willow challenge each other to a strange little game. Silly and a little fluffy.
Spoilers: Nothing specific, but I’m assuming it’s mid-fifth season, so consider anything in that time frame fair game.
Author's Note: Just a goofy little idea I had.

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Willow grinned, and wiggled in her seat. "Okay, me first. And on that note . . . me!"

Xander smirked at his old friend. "Too easy. Pretty redheaded Jewish girl who does magic? The Scarlet Witch."He smiled in triumph, then countered, "Okay . . . since you started with yourself, how ‘bout me?"

The witch cocked her head to one side. "Ummmm. No superpowers . . . and you’re not quite detective enough to be Batman. And you’re not a kid anymore, and you can handle yourself pretty well, so you’re not Robin, or Rick from "The Incredible Hulk". . . I know, the grown-up Robin, whatshisname . . . Nightwing!"

He pursed his lips and considered it. "I guess the judges will accept that answer. I was kinda hoping for something edgier, like the Punisher."

That earned him a shake of the head. "You know how to use a gun, but you almost never use one. And you’re not all revenge-y like he is. Okay, here’s a tougher one: Angel!"

Xander looked up at the ceiling to consider it. "Hmmm. Leaving out the obvious comparisons to other vampires like Morbius or Baron Blood . . . onetime bad guy turned good . . . afraid to let himself get close to people, or bad stuff happens . . . " He snapped his fingers. "The sex is wrong, but I’d say Rogue. She does the whole power-draining thing with a touch, but when she was bad she usually did it with a kiss, you know. And her hair’s just as weird as Angel’s, but in a different way."

Willow giggled a little. "Hmmmm, interesting. I guess I can let that one slide."

He grinned back at her. "Okay, smartypants. How ‘bout this one: Spike!"

She groaned. "Oooo, that one’s gonna be tough. Ummm . . . bad guy who’s semi-reformed, but not completely trustworthy . . . thick British accent . . . associates with demons but they can’t stand him . . . ummm, John Constantine?"

Xander cocked his head to one side, then the other as he considered it. "Hmmm. Maybe. I didn’t think you’d pull that one off at all . . . "

Willow grimaced. "Well, if you’re so smart, I’ll challenge you to go for the gusto: Buffy!"

He smiled. "Actually, thinking about her is how I got the idea for this game in the first place. Dual identity, strong and fast but all too human . . . has a witty remark for every bad guy she takes down . . . lost some loved ones along the way . . . always got blamed for stuff that wasn’t her fault . . . blames herself for stuff that isn’t her fault . . . No contest. Lose the webslinging and the funny costume, and she’s Spider-Man."

Willow raised her eyebrows. "You think about this stuff entirely too much."

Xander grinned. "What can I say? You gotta think about something when you spend the whole day carrying, hammering, and riveting. Haven’t figured out Tara, Anya, or Giles yet, but I’m working on it."

With a laugh, Willow got to her feet. "You do that. I’m gonna go ask Buffy if she’s ever been bitten by a spider."

FIN

A/N: Like I said, silly and fluffy. Please don’t be cruel.