Title: A Trip in Leggie's Shoes
Chapter 6: A Death Threat and a Shield
Author: Audrey Ramirez
Contact: audreyramirez@aol.com
Rated: PG-13
Summary: What would happen if you got transported into the Lord of the Rings movie, it was real, and you were in Legolas's body....did I mention that you were utterly crazy too? Probably ruin his life...


*

-Piff-

"What the-"

-Piff-

"Hey!"

-Piff-

"Stop that!"

-Piff-

"LEGOL-"

-Boof!-

"Sorry there, mon cap-i-tan, I didn't think you'd turn around," I said, standing over Aragorn.

Aragorn lay on the ground, spitting snow, which had just been thrown at him, out of his mouth. The impact of it had thrown him onto the ground.

Before he got a chance to yell at me, I said in the lowest voice I could manage, "Get up, lesser mortal!" I was flaunting the fact that, while his feet were sunken far into the snow, I could traverse about on it, prancing along without even breaking the surface. Oh yes, prancing was a big thing with me. Elf magic.

He coughed and rose in the most dignified way he could manage, throwing me a death glare, and stomped off.

I was like a puppy following its master. There was no point here in following the fellowship up the mountain, knowing that we would soon have to go back again, yet I continued to prance along with them. It was no fun to be left alone. However, for Aragorn, perhaps that was not the case.

"So, Ari, how's life in the powder?" I taunted as I pranced around him.

"Leave me alone, Elf!" he growled.

Suddenly, Frodo tripped and rolled down to Aragorn's feet. "Frodo!" Aragorn shouted. He picked him up and set him right, and then Frodo felt around for his ring. It was not around his neck. "Boromir," Aragorn said sternly.

Boromir had picked up the fallen ring and was examining it, under a trance. "It is a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt over so small a thing. Such a little thing," he remarked.

"Boromir! Give the ring to Frodo!" Aragorn barked, bringing Boromir into reality.

Ok, sure I didn't have any lines at this part, but why the hell couldn't I have any?

Boromir held out the ring for Frodo.

"Yoink!" I cried, grabbing the ring and running around Boromir in circles. I tossed the ring up and Frodo caught it in his little hands, but when I came back around to Frodo and Aragorn, I found myself at sword point.

Aragorn had his sword drawn and was pointing it steadily at me. "I'm sick of you, Elf, and if you give me a reason to, I will dispose of you. Take the ring again and."

"You think I care about the ring?" I sniffed, looking Aragorn up and down as if he was an inferior.

Aragorn lunged forward and I found my back slamming into the snow. My feet might have not sunken when I walked, yet when I was pinned down with his weight on top of me, the snow was compacted against our combined mass. My head was thrown back, exposing my throat column to his silver blade. It barely kissed my flesh.

I was shaking. Was he going to kill me? I gulped nervously, barely daring to breath for fear the blade would penetrate my beautiful neck.

"It is not yours to handle. Touch the ring again and you will be dead," he said, drawing his blade away.

"I understand," I said seriously. I was seeing what happened when Aragorn's last string of nerves had been broken. "Now, can you get off me?" I said as politely as I could. I waited until the blade was sheathed. He gave me a warning look, as if show me he meant business.

Well guess what, so did I. When he did not immediately get off me, I kneed him hard in the crotch, causing him to roll aside and pain and lift his mass off me. Finally free, I sprung out of the snow and made a beeline for Gandalf. I had not noticed that the entire Fellowship had stopped and watched our display. Embarrassment was not something to worry about now, however.

Standing next to Gandalf, I would be safe. Aragorn stayed where he was, giving me a look that longed for revenge. "Let us move on!" cried Gandalf sternly, and with that we surged up the mountain.

******

Soon, the blizzard on Caradhras was at full force, making it hard for even my Elven eyes to see. The company was knee deep in powder, having trouble making their way through, while I walked nimbly on top of the snow, listening.

Aragorn had Frodo and Sam on each shoulder; all three eyed me angrily once in awhile. Oh great, I thought. Now only Merry and Pippin like me. I was enough of a troublemaker for them to admire my spirit. Gandalf tolerated me, but that was his job.

I peered around, having reached the front of the group and the corner of the cliff. Listening hard, I heard Saruman's incantations traveling on the wind. "There is a fell voice on the air!" I cried.

"It's Saruman!" announced Gandalf.

I flipped my head up as I heard a deep rumble. Large chunks of snow began to fall towards us. I dodged one that nearly hit me, yet most went over the side.

Aragorn hoarsely yelled through the snow, "He's trying to bring down the mountain! Gandalf, we must turn back!"

"No!!" yelled Gandalf. He stood up and tried his best to yell out an Elvish counter spell to the one I heard Saruman's voice saying.

But I knew it was no use. I slowly turned my head up as I heard the barrage of snow above me obey the whims of Saruman. "Aw shit.." I said pathetically, as I ran forward and pulled Gandalf away from the cliff's edge.

Suddenly, the hard chunks of ice rained down upon me. I cried out in pain as they forced themselves onto me. The pressure I felt was unbearable. I was soon buried underneath the snow. I squirmed against the packed snow and fought my way out, gasping for the breath that had just been knocked out of me.

Everyone surfaced out of the snow, and Boromir spoke up. "We must get off the mountain! Make for the Gap of Rohan! Or take the west road to my city!"

"The Gap of Rohan takes us to close to Isengard!" Aragorn jumped in.

"We must go through the Mines of Moria!" I interrupted. Who gave a crap if it was Gimli's time for a line. "It's the only way! Please, listen to me! I have forseen it! Did I not say that we could not go through the pass of Caradhras!? That we would have to go back down!? Am I not right? We need to go through the Mines if we want to make it alive!"

"I am afraid that the elf is right!" shouted Gimli. "The Mines of Moria would be best, and Balin would.."

"Enough about Balin, he will not be there! This I have also forseen. I may not be the best Fellowship member but I respect the intentions of the group. I would not lead you astray, as I would not try to take the ring for my own purposes. I mean to help!"

Gandalf thoughtfully sighed. "Let the ring bearer decide." He did not want to go into the mines. "Frodo?"

Frodo looked around nervously. Then his eyes fell upon me. I did my best to express a pleading look through my own eyes. He must have seen my desperation. "We shall go through the mines," he announced decidedly.

"So be it," Gandalf said acceptingly.

******

"Please?"

"Legolas, for the last time, you can not use one of the hobbits as a sled," Gandalf sighed.

We were on our way down the mountain, and I was sick of walking around. Nothing interesting was happening and we hadn't had any real fun in a long time.

"So, Aragorn, who was right, huh? Who knew? C'mon, tell me, who knew? Who knew we were going to have to go back down?" I said, elbowing Aragorn. He darted to the side and refused to look at me. "Uh huh, that's right! Who's yo daddy, Aragorn? Leggie's yo daddy!"

Aragorn whipped his face around, his hair softly falling to the side. "Hold your tongue, elf, before you find your life in grave danger."

I smirked. Suddenly, something caught my eye. Right in front of me, Boromir was walking, with his shield attached to his back. The shield. It was perfect.

I lunged forward and grabbed the shield. I threw it onto the snow, with the concave side facing up, and before anybody else could do anything, I jumped onto it and rode it down the mountain like a sled. My legs were folded up underneath me and I held onto the shield, whizzing through the snow. My hair whipped out behind me as the cold wind pressed against me and slightly stung my cheeks. I looked up to the Fellowship; they were looking at me in awe. I let out a laugh as I saw Merry and Pippin cheering me on.

It was not long before the shield skidded to a stop in the snow at the base of the mountain, the Fellowship was not that far from the bottom. I sprung off of the shield and whisked it up, then ran as hard as I could back to the rest of them.

I grabbed Pippin and threw down the shield again, jumping on and placing Pippin on the tops of my thighs. Once again I was off, the hobbit on my lap, as we zipped down the slope. Pippin laughed merrily, excited that finally we were doing something for leisure for a change.

Soon I went back up and did the same with Merry, leaving Pippin at the bottom. Merry was having the time of his life; the snow that sprayed up under the shield was all in his unruly hair. I left Merry at the bottom, then ran back up to the slope to my...less than friends.

Proudly lifting my head, I handed over the shield to Boromir, who had one eyebrow raised as he snatched it away. "I thank you, Boromir, for generously allowing me to use this," I said seriously, then turning and avoiding further conversation, I ran down the hill. Going downhill, I picked up so much speed that I felt the need to suddenly tumble down. I allowed myself to fall, though being an elf I wouldn't have done it if I had not deemed it so, and happily rolled the rest of the way down.

I collapsed on my back at the foot of the slope, laughing up at the sapphire sky above. I had so much snow in my hair and stuck to my clothes that I was near soaking wet. My bow was underneath me, yet I did not feel pain from it since the snow was cushioning me. I sighed and curled my fingers against my fists. My two hobbit friends lay down in the snow next to me as we awaited the arrival of the other six members and the pony.

TBC