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Uh Oh, she's in trouble
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Suicide
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(The lights in the arena go out as the cameras show a packed house for yet another TWW house show. All of a sudden, Some Girls Do by Saywer Brown plays over the PA sysyem, as Stephanie emerges from the back, almost in tears, with a microphone in hand. As she walks to the ring, she steps up onto the ring apron and then under the bottom rope. As she looks around at the thousands of fans packed into the Staples Center for the second house show this day, she begins to talk, wiping a tear from her cheek.)
Stephanie:Im out here now to apologise for my actions at the last show. What happened shouldnt have happened, and I should have been at Shockwave on Monday. What happened at the last house show only a few hours ago was an accident. I was almost knocked out, and David took advantage of me. I aplogise for that, but Shawn, youve got to understand, I didnt mean for it to happen. I was as shocked as you were. Ive made sure that David has left the building, and he wont be coming back. Suicide, please just come out here now, ebcause I need to speak to you.
(All of a sudden Some Girls Do by Saywer Brown begins to play over the PA system as Suicide makes his way out onto the ramp, with a microphone in hand, wearing the same things he was at the last house show. With rage in his eyes he lifts the microphone to his mouth, and begins to talk.)
Suicide:Steph, its damn lucky that b****rd left, because if hed stayed around another minute Id have sent him packing myself. I know he forced himself on you, I saw the footage. But what I also saw was that you seemed to enjoy it. But now, Ill settle that with you afterwards, backstage, in private. For now I need to talk about my match with the Analcist tommorow. I realise that this Analcist is actually quite good, cos lets face it-he managed to beat Chris Matthews to a bloody pulp, so he must be good. But thats just it. You dont f**k with my friends, and Chris is one of my friends. Hes the Real FN Deal, and what are you? The Real FN Tomato Peel compared to him. You see, I dont have respect for assholes that decide to go around mucking with my business, and, to tell you the truth-thats exactly what youre doing. Youre mucking with Mr Matthews, and that aint a smart move. You see, Im absolutely pissed about that freakin David b****rd, but I just watched footage again of Shockwave. I speciafically rewound it back again for your match with my buddy, and Im now Im real mad. But youre not the only guy Im mad at.
EOE, you useless asshole, Im gonna get you, and Im gonna get you damn soon. So you better wtahc your back on Lightning, cos those damn Three Drills of Heaven wont be able to stop your opponent. You see, your opponent is somebody I respct-not like-respect. And Corx, on Thursday, I got your back, but only cos of that jerk Jack Vendetta. Oh, and Vendetta, you dont know Jack S**t about being in the big leagues. I was an EWA legend, a Cruiserweight and Tag Team champion, and what were you? A champ in a few nothing leagues. Punk, Ill admit, you beat me, and I can admit that.
It aint nothing to be ashamed of, because I also have to add Snake Eyes in, and Snack Eyes, you got my respect, but nothing else, but rubber johnny boy, Im really gonna kick your ass someday. You see, I lost to you because of some guy Ive never even heard of. Some guy who thinks hes big. Thinks hes tough. Well, E O FN E, you aint big, you aint tough, but what you are is a freakin asshole. You sa youre the Epitome of Evil? You probably dont even know what that means. But now, I really havent got the time to waste on you, so remember this quick, short message-youre mine punk. And when you make me mad, you dont like me. And I dont like you.
So, I must quickly mention Chris. Man, you and me, were friends, and we made a great team, and if any of these jerks like the Analcist try layin you out again, which they will, cos lets face it-youre a legend, and everybody knows that to take out a legend will propel you to greater things-wel, I just want you to know that I got your back. Oh, and if David comes to ya, asking if youve seen Steph, please, Im beggin ya-give him the Sideliner. And dont take any of his steroids either. Theyre bulls**t. Dont work. Just ask Vendetta.Oh, and Ive gotta give to Snack Pies for our match on Monday. Youre great. I mean, Ive neevr been in there before with an animal, and that was what you are. Oh yeah I have, Scorpio was a hoar. Oh well, I gotta go now. See ya all. Wait a minute. I havent smashed this damn guitar yet.
(With that Suicide walks up to front row where special guest Michael Jackson is sitting. As Suicide notices him he smashes the guitar over his head. Hard. Then he quickly cuts in with a little finishing line.)
Suicide:Man, Ive always wanted to do that to a damn Barbie Doll. |
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