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| [A large crowd has gathered outside a Barnes & Noble's Bookstore, complete with police cars and media vans. The local cops are fighting a losing battle against the mob, which push forward in an effort to see what all the commotion is about. The inside of the bookstore seems to be alive with activity. The TWW camera crew push and shove their way to the front of the crowd, only to be turned away by a rather cranky policeman. Never one's to give up easily, the TWW crew sidles around the side of the building and into the shadows. Turning one more corner, the crew finds the store's rear exit open and surrounded by a circle of wild-eyed Barnes & Noble's employees. A few questions to the frantic workers get little response: something about a guy going crazy and throwing books everywhere. The camera crew takes a deep breath and head inside.] [Just barely through the back door, and a large tome comes flying at them at an alarming rate of speed. Only the quick reflexes of the cameraman keeps his equipment from getting damaged. The crew sneaks in to the store proper, and catches the source of all this excitement on film.] [If not for the huge smile upon his face, it would seem as if Loki The Trickster were throwing a temper tantrum. Hurling books left and right at seemingly random targets, the TWW Cruiserweight has nearly emptied all of the shelves of their possessions. Grabbing a paperback from the Reference section, Loki is about to throw it when he notices the title, pauses, and shoves the book into his back pocket. Suddenly, The Trickster rushes at a sparsely stocked shelf and hits it with a missile drop kick! The wooden structure leans precariously for a second just before it finally topples, causing a huge crash and an explosion of paper, wood, and metal. Loki smiles triumphantly, but his grin grows even bigger when he spots the TWW crew barricaded in the corner. The small man looks around quickly - not panicky but in complete control - until he finds what he's looking for: a hard-bound copy of Roget's Thesaurus. Clutching the book in one hand, Loki leaps onto the wooden checkout desk, turns to face the camera, and smiles winningly.] "Greetings and salutations! It is I, Loki The Trickster, and I welcome you to my training grounds! I have issued a challenge to the overeducated plebeian who refers to himself as The Graduate, but have not heard a decisive reply as of yet. Should that stop me from my training? NO, I say! Also, this is quite a bit of fun. If you have never had the opportunity to destroy a store from the inside, I highly suggest you do so..." [The front door of the store begins to open, but Loki spins towards it, pulls the paperback from his back pocket, and hurls it toward the door like a frisbee. The door slams shut abruptly.] "By Odin's one good eye, I truly WANTED to read that one... I stand before you to dispel the notion that I am one of Tidal Wave Wrestling's 'quieter' members. I do tend to speak at length when I have good cause, and so far I have had none. But after last night's atrocious display of vulgarity, I feel I have no choice but to verbalize my extreme distaste and repulsion by the act of The Graduate. It is one thing to attack fellow members of the roster - indeed, I believe that in this profession one comes to expect that sort of unwarranted behavior. But you, sir, crossed the invisible line when you laid your foul hands upon that maiden fair last night. I shall be MORE than happy to accommodate your request for a match on Friday night, and I am delighted that the gentlemen upstairs have deemed this a tournament match. Actually, Graduate, just between you and I, I can not what the stipulations are, as long as I have the chance to make you pay for your heinous actions." [The front door begins to open again, and Loki is quick to see it. Running to the end of the checkout counter, The Trickster doesn't miss a step and still manages to kick a small display of bookmarkers directly toward the door. The door closes quickly.] "I fear that my tirade has garnished unwanted attention and that my training period is drawing to a close. And so, I would like to take this time to stoop to a toddler's mentality and call The Graduate a few choice names, thanks to my handy reference book." [Striking a noble pose, Loki opens the thesaurus and holds it aloft with one hand.] "Graduate, you are a fool, a simpleton, and a ninny. You also posses qualities of a milksop, a dullard, and a nincompoop. You are a dimwit, a halfwit, and a lackwit, as well as a dunderhead and a mooncalf..." [From outside, an amplified voice, as if through a bullhorn, shouts "To the person inside: stop what you're doing and come out with your hands above your head." Loki stops his recitation and frowns.] "Well, my friends, it appears as though I need to cut short our name-calling session. I would like to continue at your earliest convenience, but I believe that it is time for my retreat. Until next time, farewell!" [And with that, Loki The Trickster hurls the heavy thesaurus at the door, takes three long strides and launches himself off of the counter and into the air. The small wrestler catches the top of a bookshelf and pulls himself up, glancing quickly at the front door. He straightens, smiles directly at the camera, and leaps upward, grasping an air duct and pulling himself up and into the metal shaft. Loki's black boots disappear into the ceiling just as the front door of the bookstore bursts inward and a horde of police enter the scene of destruction.] |
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