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| Scene 12 Int. Spookyville Mansion. 21.19 Narrator (v/o): - "Last time we saw Carlos De Angelo and The Graduate Jay Gavin they were heading to the hallway of Spookyville Mansion to investigate a strange knocking sound. We now join them just seconds later, please ignore the fact that between the last time we saw them in the mansion and the present day the have both been present on live TWW programming. I mean, it’s only comedy…" We fade up. We are looking at the huge old hallway of the huge old spooky mansion where we last saw Jay and Carlos. The two men are now stood in the center of the hall, staring around. Their clothes have mysteriously changed since last time we saw them; Jay wears a dark blue hooded Adidas sweater and red Adidas pants. Carlos wears similar pants, and an official black TWW T-shirt. All around them the hall is shaking, the furniture rattles, paintings on the wall violently swing, the knocking contines. The Graduate: - "Dude, this is some crazy (bleep)" Carlos: - "Is true, is true." The Graduate: - "I think it’s coming from over there…" He starts edging towards one end of the hall. Carlos: - "Ah, be being very careful mi amigo…" The Graduate is edging slowly towards the apparent source of the shaking. The camera turns to show his destination. We see for the first time that it is emanating from the ornate main doors into the mansion. They are rattling viciously. Jay moves towards them very slowly, cautiously. He looks back over his shoulders at Carlos, a look of mild fear on his face. With a gulp and a raise of his eyebrows he places his hand on the large, gothic door handle. From off-camera, Carlos lets out a little yelp of fear. The Graduate: - "You ready?" There is no response. The camera turns around to focus on the spot where Carlos was standing just seconds earlier; he is no longer there. We scan the room, quickly spotting the Spaniard. He is cowering, shivering, curled up in a ball on the floor behind a grand piano in one corner of the room. The Graduate: - (Wistfully) "How did they ever manage to get you in a wrestling ring? (He turns back to the door) Well, here we go." There is another yelp from Carlos as The Graduate swings open the doors with a loud clunk then somewhat disturbing creaking sound. As they open the camera simultaneously pulls backwards to show what’s there…there is nothing, at least at first glance. After a few seconds we notice, framed and diminutive in the enormous doorway, a solitary figure. The Graduate: - "Miguel???" The camera zooms in again, indeed the figure is none other than Miguel the (former) butler. The Graduate: - "How did you find us here?" Miguel: - "I’m afraid I have a small confession, sir, I’ve spent the last fortnight sleeping in the trunk of your car...it's hardly spacious but at least it’s warm…except at night…and since my wife took the children back to London I’ve had nowhere else to pass the time of day…I miss…I miss…" He stops suddenly as he is hit in the head by a large flying object, which turns out to be a piano stool. Miguel is knocked out cold. The camera turns around, Carlos is standing up next to the piano, he shrugs. Carlos: - "Come on, is you really believing his silly leeetle, how you say, sob story? He is just being a leeetle bit crazy-mad, we cannot be having him here with us, there is being too much money at the stake." The Graduate: - "Well then professor, what exactly do you propose we do to him?" We fade out. We fade up again on a shot of the grand piano. The lid has been pulled down and Carlos and Jay are in the process of nailing it shut. Carlos: - "There, I is thinking that will be doing the trick." The Graduate: - "Yeah, but man that was harder work than it looked. We could have done with an extra pair of hands really." Carlos: - "Ah si, it is being a shame that we were having to be drowning Miguel in the lake really, or he could have been helping." Stretching, the two men begin to walk back towards the archway into the living area. We change cameras to see them arrive back at the chairs they were sitting in earlier. They sit down. The Graduate: - "Well, it’s been a hard day dude, I think I might just try to get a little sleep down here before I cut a promo about Syth." Carlos: - "OK, I is thinking that I will just be reading the newspaper, I will be seeing you later." The Graduate closes his eyes, the camera zooms in on his face. After a few seconds strange music begins to play… "I don’t want to see God mommy, am I going to die? It really hurts mommy, am I going to die?" Jay’s eyes open suddenly. He blinks furiously for a few seconds as if trying to decide whether or not he imagined the music, but as it continues he sits up straight in his chair, looking reasonably scared. The Graduate: - "What the (bleep) is that…where’s it coming from?" Carlos: - "Oh, my apologies mi amigo, I was not meaning to be waking you…" The camera pans around to show that Carlos is playing the aforementioned music from a small portable radio (handler’s note: the music quoted from is "Spinal Meningitis (Got Me Down)" by Ween, I advise you all to go download it from Napster soon). The Graduate breathes a sigh of relief, but still looks somewhat agitated. The Graduate: - "Is it me, Carlo, or is there something odd about this house. I feel it, I feel it deep inside, in my bones, like I’m being watched, by someone, or something, is it just me? Can I just be imagining it, can I be imagining these thousand sets of eyes in the darkness, peering out, watching me, warning me, is it really just me? Can I just be imagining the chill that went down my spine the second I stepped through the door? Tell me Carlo, do you feel evil manifested in every room, in every shadowy corner…do you feel the spirits here Carlo, or is it just me?" Carlos: - (Long pause) "It is just being you." The Graduate: - (Long pause) "Eh, OK." Carlos: - "Seeing as you is being wide-awakey now, mi amigo, I is thinking maybe this is being a good time to be addressing your match tomorrow night, against the one that is being known as Skip." The Graduate: - "Syth? Yeah, what’s up with that dude? Guess I got lucky in the lottery, huh?" Carlos: - "Ah, no, mi amigo. Before we is coming out to this big scary mansion, just a few hours ago, I was watching the one that is being known as Skip cutting a promo in your direction, is true, is true. Now, if he is, how you say, walking the walk like he is, how you say, talking the talk, then I is thinking that you could be having some trouble in the brick-on-a-pole match on Tuesday, is true, is true." The Graduate: - "That’s all well and good dude, but seriously, I’m a top class wrestler, I’m on the hottest streak in the history of TWW, I hardly think some newcomer can stand toe to toe with me…" Carlos: - "Ah, do not be getting me in the wrong Senor Super-Clever, I is knowing that you is being able to be beating him, I is knowing that if you is getting the chance to be locking the most devastating submission hold in the history of wrestling onto him then he is tapping out…" The Graduate: - (Interrupting) "That’s a fact, it can be scientifically proven…" Carlos: - (Interrupting) "Si, IF you is locking on Examination Day…but he is being a good wrestle-man, he is cutting the good promo…now all we is having to do is be cutting a better promo back at him." The Graduate: - "What’s that got to do with anything? I’m a better wrestler than he is, I hardly think my promo matters, I mean it’s not like the match is going to be decided by who does a better interview now, is it?" Carlos: - (Gravely) "You would be surprised. Anyway…" The Graduate: - "I’m sorry, I digress…tell me Carlo, as my coach, what do I have to do?" Carlos: - "OK, I is having a few ideas. First off, we is having to talk about Skip and be saying that he is a good wrestle-man, but that he is not being able to survive the most deva…" The Graduate: - (Interrupting) "I think we did that…" Carlos: - "OK, well we could be mentioning your hot streak, the hottest streak in the his…" The Graduate: - (Interrupting) "Done." Carlos: - "Well, then I is exhausting all of my ideas…unless…Skip was quoting the, how you say, poetry to be ending his promo, we could be borrowing his format?" The Graduate: - "No way dude, I don’t do poetry…" Carlos: - "Is you wanting to be winning?" The Graduate: - (Pause) "OK, what type of poetry do you have in mind?" Carlos: - (Producing a book, labeled "Poetry" in thick black lettering) "Ah, luckily I was coming prepared!" We fade out. We fade up again. The Graduate is now standing in the middle of the living room, looking focussed. He clears his throat several times. The Graduate: - (He speaks dramatically, with passion and intensity) "Flintstones…meet the Flintstones, They’re a modern Stone Age family, From the…town of Bedrock, They’re a page right out of history, Let’s ride…with that family down the street, Through the…courtesy of Fred’s two feet, When you’re with the Flintstones, You’ll have a yabba-dabba-doo time, A dabba-doo time, You’ll have a gay old time." Roses land at Jay’s feet as he finishes his recital, we turn to see Carlos flinging roses from a vase near his right hand in between clapping, wiping away tears of emotion and scratching his genitals. The Graduate just looks vaguely embarrassed. The Graduate: - "Y’know, I’m sure I remember being a credible wrestler once, as opposed to some comedian. What the hell happened?" Carlos: - (Matter-of-fact) "You were running out of inspiration and sending for me to be livening up your interviews." The Graduate: - (Sighs) "Oh yeah." We fade out. We fade up again. We are now looking at a bedroom; it is, like the rest of the house, gothic and ornate. Sleeping in a four poster bed is The Graduate, he is having a fitful sleep, tossing and turning and wiping his brow. All is silence apart from his movement. Suddenly the silence is broken by a voice speaking in chilling monotone. Disembodied Voice: - "The darkness is coming, the darkness is strong, the darkness is all around me, suffocating me, strangling me, the darkness is dangerous, it creates fear, it is fear, the darkness will always beat you. No, no, noooooooooooooooooooooo." Looking puzzled, Grad sits up in bed. Something dawns on him and he throws his bedclothes to the floor. There, curled up at one end of the bed is Carlos, still muttering about darkness. Jay prods him with his foot. The Graduate: - "Hey, out of my bed, you’re disturbing my sleep, all this talk of darkness…" Carlos: - (Waking) "Talking of darkness? I’m sorry mi amigo, I must have been having the, how you say, nightmares about being forced to spend fifteen of your solid American hours listening to Skip…" The Graduate: - "Syth?" Carlos: - "Si, Skip. Is horrible, all the silly leeetle man is doing is talking about the darkness, trying to be mysterious, is so, so horrible, is true, is true." The Graduate: - "OK, but can you go have nightmares somewhere else, some of us have to wrestle tomorrow, and it’s hard enough to sleep in this creepy house anyway." Carlos: - (Quietly) "Please let me be sleeping with you tonight…" The Graduate: - "Oh, OK. Just be quiet and don’t…put your hands anywhere. Now turn out the light and let’s at least try to sleep. Just think of the million dollars we get in the morning!" The light is turned out and all is darkness. The Graduate: - (In the darkness) "Y’know Carlo, I don’t like this house at all, it gives me the creeps. And I got a funny feeling we’re not going to be able to sleep the whole night without some weird (bleep) going down." Carlos: - (In the darkness) "I is knowing exactly what you is meaning, mi amigo." Fade out. Fade up. The light in the room lets us know it is now morning. The two men are lying on opposite sides of the large bed. They simultaneously wake up, stretch and climb out, both fully dressed. The Graduate: - "Wow! Guess we did get a good night’s sleep after all." Fade out. Fade up. Carlos and Jay are now standing at the gates where we first saw them arrive at the mansion. They are joined by a third man, dressed in a suit and carrying a briefcase. Man: - "Well congratulations men, as the official representative of this estate I can confirm that you will now inherit one million dollars, I hope it makes you very happy. Now which one of you men is Mr. De Pedro?" Carlos: - "Ah, is me, the Angel, the Icon, El Extremist de Espana…Carlos De Angelo!" Man: - "I’m sorry, you mean Carlos De Pedro?" The Graduate: - "I don’t believe…I mean…tell me that you didn’t…but the letter was addressed…" Carlos: - "I is being sorry, I is thinking that there is being a terrible, but hilariously funny, mix-up here. I is being Carlos De Angelo not De Pedro…" Man: - "Oh well, terribly sorry, but still you are of course entitled to the million dollars anyway!" The Graduate: - (His face lights up) "Really?" Man: - (He starts to laugh hysterically) "No, of course not really, that’d just be silly! Now excuse me, I have real claimants to deal with…" He climbs into a nearby car and speeds off, sending dust flying across the driveway. The Graduate: - "Carlo…wasn’t that your car?" Carlos: - (Slowly) "Yes…yes it was…" The two of them look at one another. We fade out. To Be Continued… Scene 13 after Shockwave |
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