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| ** The scene opens at a special leisure centre for TWW in downtown Phoenix, Arizona. The camera moves through the staff, past guys like Kris Cole playing tennis with the Masked Jobber, Sharc playing cards with copy room gossiper Just Moe, eventually the cameraman reaches the sports bar. Sitting watching Lightning by himself is The Real F’N Deal Chris Matthews. The camera closes in on Chris who’s wearing his "I’m The Greatest" T-shirt and black umbro sports trousers. The camera looks to see what part of the show he’s watching, and it’s the main event. Chris stands up and punches the wall, as the show gets to the bit where E.O.E screws him over, Chris angrily turns the television off and gets ready talk to the camera** Chris: HOW MANY FREAKIN’ TIMES AM I GONNA GET SCREWED? That bastard is dead! D-E-A-D, dead!! He’s is gonna pay dearly for what he's done to me...at last, I can have my revenge!! This Shockwave, his ass belongs to me, and I'll make sure he will NEVER screw around with America’s Most Wanted again! I've waited too goddamn long for this...ha, ha, ha, ha, and now finally...its time! Its time to show him who’s the main man in the TWW! It's time to pay that cheating bastard back... **No he isn't crazy, but Chris is obviously very excited over something** Cameraman: [off-screen]: Umm…who is dead? What are you babbling about, Mr. Matthews? Chris: Babbling? Go to hell! That rotten son of a bitch, our beloved dead man, Mr. Prince Of Evil, Epitome Of Evil is has given me the chance for me to kick his pathetic psychically challenged @ss all around the arena on Shockwave. Believe me as much as I’m a good guy, after all I am Humanitarian Of The Year but it’s time to show my ruthless evil side, the one that destroyed three supposedly Extreme men at our first show, that’s right Hardcore Matthews is back, to beat the bejesus out of the gun toting bitch E.O.E. You see your Prince of Evil gimmick is pretty piss poor, actually as poor as your women in bed, and trust me she’s like a door knob…everyone’s had a ride! Come on E.O.E you have to admit she’s an ugly s—t. Hell she’s so ugly when she stuck her head outta the window she was arrested for mooning. See I can insult you all day E.O.E because your brain isn’t smart enough to pick them up, and for proof that you’re an idiot take a long look at Shockwave. You decided to play the little warrior of justice attacking Louis, Suicide, and I just to prove your mummy that you’re a big boy, and what a man you are. Jumping people from behind is sooooooooooo jobber like considering you want to be considered a main eventer…HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Don’t make me laugh. You couldn’t main event a cattle market show let alone the TWW. This cameraman could kick your @ss. E.O.E for your sake retire, move into a cave in the Rocky Mountains never to show your face again because spanky **Chris brushes back his blonde hair with his hand, smirking as he always does. Chris pauses for a second to build up tension, then goes back on his rant. ** Chris: Okay now I’m gonna say my piece about the lucky bastard also Nations "belt warming" Champion Shaggy from Scooby Doo! or as some know him The Graduate. Yet again I look like a pussy as I lose because I was jumped by E.O.E and forced to lose again to The Graduate. Look at first I chuckled at Carlos and The Graduate, now I find them annoying and boring like Scooby Doo. The guys are not funny. Martin Swift in a thong is funny, Andy Extreme dressed as a clown is funny, seeing Shawn Chase in a shower is funny, watching E.O.E wrestle is funny. Watching those idiots and their cheeky little schemes is boring. Let me say that again BORING . I would rather watch Cathy Lee and Regis 24hour non stop special instead of nearly killing myself with boredom at those two talking. Well Graduate I can wait until Mind Games to get a piece of you because it gives me more time to fill myself with hatred for you. I will beat you Graduate like I’ll beat E.O.E because I’M THE GREATEST! **The cameraman turns the camera off as the scene fades to total blackness** |
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