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| **The scene opens outside a building, as the camera zooms in on the building the sign above the door can be read, "Hammerlock Wrestling", the scene then cuts inside the building where old and young wrestling prospects are trying to learn their trade, throughout the gym students are learning different holds and skills. The camera then focuses in on the back corner of the gym where one man is practicing different kicks on a heavy bag, while another man tries to hold the bag steady. The camera zooms in closer, so their faces can be seen and the man kicking the heavy bag is revealed to be The Real F’N Deal Chris Matthews. Chris takes a few more kicks at the bag, each kick almost knocks the man holding the bag down, then stops to take a break, as Chris sits down the TWW camera crew approaches him. Chris catches a glimpse of the crew heading his way and stands up with a towel in his hand and wipes the sweat form his chest, then wipes his face. ** Chris: TWW fans, welcome to where the career of "The Real F’N Deal" began, Hammerlock Wrestling school. I like many others came to this gym day in and day out hoping to make it big, not everyone makes it but some, like myself, do. **Chris pauses to take a drink of water. ** Chris: Now I'm sure that most of you, along with E.O.E, are wondering why I'm here in Maidstone, England instead of being in the crap hole known as the United States Of America. The answer to that question is simple… I'm honing my in-ring skills for my match with E.O.E. The reason, with the booking team constantly booking me into skill-less extreme rules matches my technical skills need some fine tuning, so I'm here with my good friend, and the owner of Hammerlock Wrestling, Andre Baker to do just that. Follow me guys. **Chris leaves the area where he is training and enters another room, a weight room. Chris walks over and sits down on a bench to do bench presses; two other men start stacking weights on the bar. Chris lies down on the bench and slides under the bar and lifts the weights into the air, after about seven reps a young kid about sixteen enters the room. ** Kid: Hey Chris, there some guy here wanting to wrestle the best guy in the gym. ** Chris sets the weight bar on the rack and sits up. ** Chris: What does this dude look like? Kid: Gee that’s a toughie. Well, he's about six foot and maybe one hundred and ninety pounds. **Chris stands up and exits the weight room, as he exits a guy approaches him** Guy: How ya doing, I Johnny Knoxville from MTV's Jackass and I want to see if I have real wrestling match and not get hurt. Chris: Well Johnny, you came to the right place, cause your just in time for my to do some ring work. Let me go change out of these sweaty clothes and I'll give you a real wrestling match. Unlike that fat idiot E.O.E **Chris walks away to go get changes as the cameras stay with Johnny Knoxville. ** Johnny: So who is this guy I'm gonna be "wrasslin" against? Kid: His name is Chris Matthews, TWW superstar. Johnny: So he's a professional? Kid: Let's see, he's on TV every week and he also gets paid big bucks. Oh yeah he’s held over 10 titles including three world titles. Johnny: So this Chris-guy could hurt me if he wanted to? Kid: Whadda you mean could? He will hurt you. **The scene then cuts to Chris and Johnny both standing in the together. Johnny starts jumping/dancing around the ring occasionally acting like he's gonna kick or hit Chris. Chris looks at the camera with an annoyed look on his face, about that time Johnny reaches over and slaps Chris across the face. ** Chris: HAHAHA, so you wanna get serious? **Johnny then fakes a kick, but Chris catches his leg. Chris holds on to his leg for a couple of seconds, then smiles at Johnny then executes a dragon leg screw whip. Johnny hits the mat and instantly grabs his knee in pain. Chris picks Johnny up by the hair and levels him with a big right hand, send Johnny back down to the mat. ** Chris: You wanted a real wrestling match? You've got one. **Chris lifts Johnny back up, then put him in a double under hook position, then throws him across the ring with a release double under hook suplex. Johnny lays there holding his back and knee. Chris looks around at the ring, then takes a few steps backwards which puts him in one of the corners. Chris slaps his right leg a couple of time, then positions himself do deliver a wall flip kick. Chris shakes his head "no" then picks Johnny pick and slams him into the nearest corner, then lifts him up and sets him on the top turnbuckle. ** Chris: E.O.E watch close, cause you'll get this first hand at Lightning on Friday. **Chris nails Johnny in the gut with a stiff right hand then grabs him and hit a top rope suplex** Chris: One thing that these Jackasses should learn, is they don't need to go looking for something they don't really want to find. **Chris looks back as Johnny is trying to get to his feet. ** Chris: Watch this. ** Chris kicks Johnny back down onto the floor** Chris: here comes Chris Jericho’s favourite…the armbar! ** Chris locks in an armbar to which Johnny submits as soon as Chris wrenches it in. The two guys that came in with Johnny rush over to check and see if he's alright. They try picking him up but he's just dead weight and falls back to the floor; his head bounces off the floor. One of the guys climb into the ring and jump Chris from behind, taking him to the ground. Chris and the man struggle for a few moments, till Chris pulls the guy off his back, both men quickly get to their feet. They stand in the middle of the ring sizing each other up; Chris confidently stands up straight with his trademark cocky smirk on his face. ** Chris: Listen good and hard to what I'm gonna tell you, cause I'm only saying it once. I'm gonna turn around and count to five to give you a chance to leave the ring with your ass intact, but if you're still here when I turn around I'm gonna take this right foot and put it upside the left side of your head. By the way don't try jumping me from behind, that will just get your ass kicked worse. **Chris turns around with his back to the man** Chris: 1,...2,...3,...4,...5. **Chris turns around and sees that the man is still there. With lightning quick movements Chris takes a step back then nails the man in the left side of his head, sending him to the mat. The man hits the mat and doesn't make a move, he's out cold. ** Chris: Didn’t momma tell you not to mess with a man with worms! Oh s—t I said that out loud. Joe, get these bums outta here. **Two young wrestlers climb into the ring and drag the guy out of the ring and outside along with the other two men. Chris exits the ring and sits down on a nearby bench, he grabs a towel and wipes his face.** Chris: Hey yo kid have you seen my special medicated cream for…ummm mmmm a rash I have. Kid: No Chris Chris: It’s Mr. Matthews to you junior. In a few hours I'll be jumping a plane to the USA for this weeks edition of Lightning, where I'll be facing Epitome Of Evil or Mr. I’m bigger than Satan. E.O.E, these two "jackasses" that came in here looking for a wrestler were chumps, nothing close to a real wrestler, but you're not that close either. So at Lightning this Friday I'm gonna put you in your place, just like I did these two idiots here today. **Chris throws the towel at the camera covering the lens, the screen goes black then cut to a commercial** |
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