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| {*Reader Disclaimer* The promo you're about to read contains dialogue of graphic nature. If you are insulted by old women, have a vivid imagination, or have a history of excessive diarhea or vomit, please turn away now*} *END DISCLAIMER* :::Grand Theft Auto. Mustang. Bandit. Two guys that have exploded on the tag team scene in Tidal Wave Wrestling. They set their goals HIGH, and standing in their way- HIGH CLASS. The TWW features many talented superstars, and to reach that next level, wrestlers must go that extra mile. Unfortuanelty, innocent bystanders are in the way::: :::Martha. It seems like everyone has an opinion on her. The energetic quadrapalegic has captured the hearts of teenage boys across the world...She has also taunted the nausiating feeling in one's stomach. Eugene doesn't mind however. They're in love, "Eugie" and Martha, peas and carrots, Pamela and Tommy Lee...Martha cooks dinner for the two, Eugene handles her social security checks. The kiss, they hug, they cuddle by a cozy fire reading "The Khama Sutra," and acting out each chapter. For the first time in High Class' adult life, they are genuninely happy. Last week, however, Grand Theft Auto TRIED to change all that. After knocking out the tag champs, they set their sights on Martha. They tortured the defenseless woman, who was later rushed to the hospital. On Tuesday, Eugene promised revenge. But when all was said and done, Grand Theft Auto was still on top. High Class has dominated the tag team competition, but does Grand Theft Auto have their number?::: :::The scene opens up inside the hotel room of Martha and Eugene. Eugene is sitting on Martha's wheelchair with the vivacious 75 years old on her, uh, nubs. A secretly located camera zooms in on her wrinkly, sagging backside...The camera quickly shifts to the other side of the room, where clothes are seen in a pile on the floor. On the nightstand, is a pair of false teeth, which appear to be Martha's. Martha looks up at Eugene with a sneaky grin, as the scene begins::: "Eugie, would you like a gumball?" *Wink,wink* "For some reason sweetie, I don't think you're talking about bubble gum!!!" *Giggle, giggle* "Oooh, you know me well, Eugie..." :::Martha proceeds to slip back down, as the camera fades to black::: "Hi, I'm Johnathon McNeil for a Fox Sports television news brief. We appear to be having, uh, some, uh technical difficulties...Please standby, as this disgust-," :::Johnathon breaks out in a cold sweat::: "Ok, to everyone watching, here's the skinny. What you were ABOUT to see is disgusting, revolting, and very disturbing, Fox Television just saved your years of therapy...Thanks for your time, as we take you back to TWW." :::The scene opens back up inside the hotel room, as Martha is seen on top of the sink, wiping her face with a towel::: "Hey Eugie, do we have any champagne, there's something stuck in my throat-" "Hi, I'm Johnathon McNeil of Fox Sports Television. We are experiencing some technical difficulties with our Tidal Wave Wrestling program. We will, uhh, try, and..." :::Johnathon's face is pale, as he clutches his stomach and begins vomiting on the set::: "It, uhh, appears we're ready again, so without, uhh, further a do, Tidal Wave Wrestling." :::The scene opens up outside the hotel room, in the narrow hallway of the 3rd floor. Nothing can be seen except for the door, but voices can be heard...::: "Eugie, stop that! Don't clench that fist! You won't be ramming anything tonight! Wait until tomorrow!" "But sweetie, I need to! I have the urge!" "Can't you wait one more day? Sheesh!? You young, strong men, only one thing on your mind..." "But, sweetie, Grand Theft Auto hurt you! I want revenge!" {What did you think they were talking about? Dirty minds...} "One more day, Eugie, one more day..." |
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