"Hello?"

"Hey, pet."

"Hey, Spike!"

"So did you enjoy the movie last night?"

"It was ok."

"Just ok, pet? The action was bloody marvelous! I loved all the violence."

"I just don't care for violent movies, Spike. I have enough violence in my life."

"Red, you can never have enough violence."

"I do. I have plenty. Like there was one time when there was this crazy blond vampire who was completely drunk. He threatened me with a broken bottle."

"Luv, I'm sure he wouldn't have marred your beautiful face with that bottle."

"I don't know, Spike...he was pretty drunk and upset."

"..."

"But he didn't hurt me."

"He never could."

"Even if he were back to being the Big Bad?"

"Naw, he'd just sire you, that's all."

"..."

"Why are you giggling, pet?"

"I'd have to call Angel grandpa to annoy him."

"You definitely would."

"I might try to take him as Puppy though, like my vampire self did."

"I dunno, Red. I'd love to torment Puppy, but..."

"But?"

"I'm just not thrilled with the idea of Peaches being broken, I guess."

"Really? I would have thought it would thrill you to no end."

"Naw, Red. That's part of Peaches' magnificence. His...presence. I've never seen anyone dominate Angelus. Not even Darla."

"Hmm....well."

"What's wrong, Red? All this talk about vampires and dominance making you uncomfortable?"

"Stop laughing, Spike. It's not funny. I'm just..."

"Squirming?"

"I am *not* squirming, Spike!"

"I can see you, Red, sitting there on your bed with your blue and green plaid boxers and your long sleeve green flannel shirt, and you are squirming."

"..."

"Pet?"

"How do you know what I wear to bed?"

"..."

"Spike..."

"Slayer told me."

"I'm sure, Spike. Have you been watching me?"

"No."

"Spike, how do you know what I wear to bed?"

"You are beautiful when you sleep."

"Spike!"

"I can hear you blushing over the phone, pet."

"Why do you watch me?"

"You are the only normal thing in Sunnyhell."

"Spike, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing, Red, just talking."

"..."

"Red?"

"Yea, Spike?"

"I did enjoy the movie last night."

"I'm glad."

"I wanted to kiss you."

"You...did?"

"Yea."

"Why didn't you?"

"The Slayer and her Toy were standing right there. I didn't fancy our first kiss ending with a stake in my back."

"Yea, that would not have been of the good."

"You are yawning, luv."

"Been a long day."

"Get some sleep. I'll call you tomorrow."

"K, Spike. Sleep good."

"Mmm-hmm, you too, Red. Tuck yourself in for me."

"Night, Spike."

"Night, Red."

END

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