Out Of Control

TITLE: Out Of Control
AUTHOR: Tienco (tienco@msn.com)
COUPLE: W/S, A/C
RATING: R, hopefully to be NC-17 soon. :)
BIG FAT WARNING: There is um. . .use of illegal narcotics in this story, guys. If that offends you, don't read it. HOWEVER, this story is meant to be hilarious, so just work past the pot part. I am by NO means telling anyone they should use it. It's a decision you have to make on your own. (Don't do drugs, they are bad, wrong, yadda, yadda. ;))
DISTRIBUTION: My site!! www.oocities.org/tienco_21 and various lists. Ask if you want it, I'll let you have it. Oh, Kylia, and Jai can always have it. . .if I've given you permission for something else, you are welcome to this.
DISCLAIMER: All belongs to Joss Whedon. Gosh, I wish I were Joss. I'd have such a good time with Spike. . .and Angel. . .and Xander. . .and Graham. . . and Lindsey. . .throw Willow and Faith in there and it's a party!!
FEEDBACK: Of *course*. Makes me write more.
SPOILERS: None, really.
SUMMARY: Willow, Spike, Angel, and Cordelia have a little party. :)
NOTES: Heard a song yesterday, made me think of my party days, had to writethis. Enjoy. :)
NOTES 2: Not beta'd. Mistakes are mine. *whine* I miss MP!
DEDICATION: To Jazz, Jennifer, and Kylia for reading this and letting meknow it was good enough to post. Special thank you to Jazz for the title.You rock, girl. :)

*~*~*~*

Angel walked in his new apartment, dropping his duffle bag and axe on theground next to the door. He shrugged his leather jacket off and looked down at it, groaning in dismay as he saw all the green demon goo all over it. "Damn it," he growled.

"Peaches, don't make so much noise when you come in," Spike's voice drifted in from the living room.

Angel rolled his eyes, hanging the jacket up. "I'll worry about goo later," he muttered, stepping into his apartment. He started to unbutton his silk shirt, knowing that the goo that had gotten on the front of it ruined it. "Spike," he called out tiredly, "I thought you'd be with Willow, or annoying LA's demon population right now."

Spike's chuckle drifted in the hallway from the living room. "Just got homemyself."

"This isn't your home, Spike. You are just staying here until you and Willow go back to Sunnydale. Cordelia didn't want you in her apartment."

"Right," Spike said knowingly, poking his head into the hallway. "You didn't want to spend time with your favorite childe."

"Most annoying childe," Angel corrected him, pulling his shirt off. "I'm getting cleaned up."

"Fine, Peaches, I'll be down here waiting. I have something for you," he grinned.

Angel rolled his eyes and went to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

*~*~*~*

Twenty minutes later, Angel stepped into the living room. Spike was kneeling at his coffee table, hunched over something. Angel's eyes narrowed, seeing a wooden box and an empty plastic baggy. His hunched over body hid everything else his childe had.

"Spike," Angel grumbled, not in the mood for anything stupid his childe hadhidden.

Spike turned with a slight grin. He was licking the edge of a rolling paper. He pulled the homemade cigarette from his mouth and tightened the edge. He held it up, surveying his work. "Perfect," he chuckled.

"Spike, you roll your own now?" Angel asked, sitting down on the couch. Heglanced at the table, frowning. There was tobacco in a neat pile on the table. Upon further examination, the *tobacco* was green, like little buds of a plant. "Spike? What the hell is this?"

Spike scooped the buds into the baggy and wrapped it up, licking the edge and closing it tightly. He shoved it into the box and closed the lid on it. "Come on, Poof." He sat up on the couch next to Angel. "You've been around for hundreds and hundreds of years -"

"Two hundred and forty seven, thank you," Angel corrected him.

"Whatever," Spike said, waving his hand. "You've been around for over twocenturies. You can't tell me you've never seen bud before."

"Bud?"

"Weed? Pot? Mary Jane? The all great and knowing green stuff that makes you high?"

Angel stared at his childe in shock. "You smoke marijuana?"

"Not exclusively, no. Just occasionally. Calms the demon. I've needed that, since the chip, you know," he said, tapping his temple.

"It calms your demon? Really?" Angel asked, sitting forward.

"Yea," Spike said softly. "I thought I'd get some, cause I've noticed you've needed your demon to calm down some. I know it's got to be hard, with your demon and your soul bloody fighting all the time." He held the joint to his lips and lit it, smiling in satisfaction as it took hold. He inhaled, coughing slightly. "Been a while," he strained, handing it to Angel.

Angel stared at the burning joint, wondering if he should do this. "Spike, I don't know. . ."

"Come on, Peaches! You know Red made the soul permanent, so you don't have to worry about your fake happiness. Just indulge. Once. For me?" He stuck out his lip and pouted.

Angel narrowed his eyes. "You've been spending too much time with Willow. You have her pout down perfect."

"Just toke and pass, you bloke." He laughed. "Toke and bloke. They rhyme!"

"You aren't high yet, stop acting like it," Angel rolled his eyes. "Besides, I heard you don't get stoned the first time. I doubt this will do anything for me."

Spike's eyes twinkled. "They said this was good stuff. It should."

"Whatever," Angel said, closing his eyes and inhaling pot for the firsttime.

*~*~*~*

"Am I stoned? I'm not stoned. I can't be stoned. We didn't even finish the first joint yet!"

Spike laughed at Angel, who was lying in the floor by now. "I think you arestoned, pet," he giggled. "Are you having a good time?"

Angel started moving his legs side to side and his arms up and down. "Great, wonderful time. My demon is *so* content right now. He's not fighting or nothing. I can just sit back and relax and enjoy."

"Angelus, what are you doing?"

"Snow angels! I thought since I was an angel myself, I could do snowangels."

Spike stood up, wobbling a bit. He went to Angel and stood above him, feet on either side of his chest. "There's no snow, Sire. You can't do that if there's no snow."

Angel turned his head and glanced at the floor. He looked up at Spike, athoughtful look in his eyes. "Um. . .hardwood floor angels?"

Spike laughed, dropping to his knees so he was straddling Angel's chest. "Ithink you are stoned, pet."

Angel brought his hands up, resting them on Spike's thighs. "You know you are my favorite childe, don't you?"

Spike grinned a cocky grin. "Of course I am. You always told me that."

"No, not Angelus. Angel. You are the only one of all of them that I think I could be around without causing torment to the soul." Angel smiled, cocking his head. "Damn. Your eyes are as blue as they were when I changed you."

Spike looked away. "Yea, whatever." He stood up, suddenly uncomfortable with his Sire's attention. He knew that Angel spoke the truth, but he didn't want to act on it, because he knew that the soul would regret it later. "We should call the girls."

Angel sat up quickly. "Yea! They could bring food! I have no food here."

Spike frowned. "You have blood in the fridge, luv. I didn't drink it all."

"No, not blood, Spike. *Food*!"

Spike grinned knowingly. "Someone has the munchies!" he sang. "Ok, I'll call them." He reached over and picked up the phone. He stared at it, blinking. "What's Cordelia's number?"

Angel snatched the phone away from him. "Let me, oh childe of mine." Hepunched in the numbers and waited for someone to pick up the phone.

"Hello?" Cordelia answered after three rings.

"Cordy! I thought you and Wills were going out tonight!" Angel exclaimed, having remembered that they were hitting all the fancy LA clubs they could.

"We decided to stay in," Cordelia answered. "What's up? I haven't had anyvisions, if that's why you are calling."

"I did," Angel said with the most serious voice he could.

"What?" Cordelia asked, standing up in shock. "No! That's me! I have the visions! What. . .what did it say?" She tried to control her emotions, scared Angel wouldn't need her anymore, since she didn't have the visions.

"Twinkies," Angel replied gravely.

Cordelia blinked, then glanced at Willow with wide eyes. "Xander? Xander's in trouble?"

Willow jumped up, instantly worried about her best friend. "Xander? Goddess, we've got to get to Sunnydale!"

"No, no, not Xander! Twinkies! I saw Twinkies and Ho-Ho's. . .pizza. . ."

"Whipped cream and strawberries!" Spike cried out from his kneeling positionon the couch. "Make them bring whipped cream and strawberries!"

"What the hell is Blondie talking about?" Cordelia asked cautiously. Shemotioned to Willow, trying to tell the frantic redhead that Xander was fine.Willow sat down, watching Cordelia with wide tear filled eyes.

"Cordelia, do you have money?" Angel asked, trying not to giggle.

"Um. . .why?"

"I need you and Willow to go to the store and bring us some stuff. Food stuff." Angel started giggling uncontrollably.

Spike snatched the phone away from his stoned Sire in time to hear Cordeliaask, "WHAT? WHY?"

"Ducks, listen. It's Blondie here." Spike struggled with the phone and thejoint, finally opting to hand it to Angel. "Pet," he said to Angel, "be careful. You'll burn your. . ."

"Fuck!" Angel cried, as the roach burned his fingers. "It's burning me!"

"So put it down, idiot," Spike growled.

Angel stared at Spike for a moment, then the light bulb went off in his head. "I'll put it down!" He set it gingerly in the ashtray. "Now don't burn up, little one," Angel cooed.

Spike rolled his eyes and pulled the phone back up to his mouth. It had been resting at his neck. "Anyway. . ."

"What the hell are you two doing?" Cordelia asked, bewildered.

"Don't worry, we are fine. Just go to the store, and. . .pretend you arebuying food for the moron. Get lots of it. Angel and I are hungry."

"But you don't eat!" Cordelia cried.

"Don't matter. Get some Wheat-A-Bix for me, too, k, luv? Thanks! Angel'll pay you back. See you in a few." He pulled the phone away and hit the disconnect button. "Come on, Peaches. I'm gonna teach you how to roll a bloody joint."

Angel looked at Spike with wide eyes. "There's blood in it?"

Spike shook his head, dropping to the floor. "Come here, Nancy-Boy. Shut up, and watch the Master."

*~*~*~*

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