Pocket Full Of Dreams...

Sunday, January 26, 2003

Ok, so I didn't realize that nose piercings could close up so fast!!! When I got home from work I must have pulled out my nose stud while I was washing my face and didn't even realize it. So, I wake up later today and realize, um, hello! Where is my nose ring??? So, after searching this whole house (not really...just the bathroom and my bedroom then the bathroom again!) I found it. I cleaned it off with a little betadine and try to put it back through and...OUCH!!! The hole shrunk so much that I had to shove it back through (no blood though!). Who thought that my body hated that little hole so much that it could almost close it up in 8 hours??? Crazy!

Why is it that every year about this time I start craving a new piercing ('99 - tongue, which I no longer have, '00 - belly button, '01 - cartilage and 3 more ear piercings, '02 - nose)??? I really want my bottom lip pierced a'la Christina Aguilera, but I think my mom would kill me (and Brett has also threatened to rip it out if I got this done...) and sometimes, even though I am 21, I really need to consider her feelings because she has learned to accept the belly button and the nose, but I don't think she could handle 2 piercings in my face...So I wanna get a tattoo (for real this time 'cause otherwise I will end up with a lip piercing) on my birthday which is in less than a month...I just gotta pick out what I want ('cause it's for sure going on my lower back). I really am thinking a fairy (yeah, I know...) or a butterfly...I guess I still have time to decide!

Well, I'm gonna go do a little FIRMing, so everyone take care!

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Saturday, January 25, 2003

I hope you were one of the lucky ones who got to see the picture of Brett because it is now gone...He didn't want it up there until I started posting pics of myself...which will hopefully be soon!

So, guess who I ran into last night at work? (Aimee and Brett don't even know this yet!)...Well, someone who I was majorly in love with about two years ago, who was never very good for me. I was so head over heels for this guy that I never really realized how bad he was for me...he had a girlfriend but that didn't stop him in pursuing me (that's kinda my bad too because I knew of her) but it was OK that he liked me because I was "way hotter" than her (um, so what? she's your GIRLFRIEND). He did a lot of, um, illegal things (this boy was arrested for possession 8 times!!! You would really think that he would have learned, after, I don't know, 1 time!). I should have known better than to like him because when I met him he was on house arrest (Duh Tiff, quite a red flag, don't you think?). I also think that I wasn't really myself around him...I mean, I was just trying to be someone I thought he would like.

After realizing all this you would think that I would be smarter than to fall right back where I was before with him, right? Wrong! I swear, as soon as I see that boy I am right back into the whole "I love him" mode! Ok, so it's really not as bad as it used to be, but hello! He just speaks to me and I melt (and he looks JUST like Justin Timberlake!). We talked last night for about an hour...he told me he was gonna call me sometime (and mentioned that I look even better than I used to, but whatever!), but I really don't wanna walk back down that road again...I know he's not good for me so I have to be strong this time...I hope.

Seriously though, I know that I am not gonna let myself fall for him all over again, he isn't worth it and besides, I know now that I can do way better than him (he has even told me this many times!) I just wish that I had listened two years ago to everyone who told me not to get involved with him...but at least I am listening now, right?

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Thursday, January 23, 2003

I love this picture soooooooo much!!! No matter how many times I see it, it always manages to put a smile on my face...I mean, is he dancing or stripping? That's Natalie, Taylor's wife, in the black shirt on the far right, dancing with Taylor's little brother. Just thought I would share because I hadn't seen that pic in a long time until today, so I thought everyone would wanna see.

Moving on...I am really contemplating on whether or not I should have agreed to go back to work full time. Yes, I really do need the money because I desperately need a new car (hopefully a Focus) and a car payment and insurance each month is expensive. On the other hand, I just really don't like my job anymore...I really like the people (well, most of them anyways) that I work with and I love the residents, but I don't know, I'm just not too happy there anymore. I think I would like to try retail out for awhile, maybe some place like PacSun or Wet Seal. I don't know, just an idea...I'm sure I'll be fine once I start full time again and those big checks start coming my way! I guess we'll see, right?

Ok, so the Atkin's diet sucks, I stuck to it for all of about one day (how many times has that happend before? Any guesses Brett or Aimee?)...I guess I just love carbs too much. I am just gonna start tommorrow with what has worked best for me in the past: counting calories! Yay. But seriously, I was at my skinniest when I counted calories (no more than 1500 a day and really healthy foods).

I know that I am not by any means fat (I wear a size 7), just not where I would like to be (a size 3). I would say that my body most resembles Kelly Clarkson's right now, where I would really like to be more like Ryan Starr (Brett even says I look like Ryan, but whatever, I think it's the hair and maybe the eyes and the weird nose, but thats about it!). But anyways, cross your fingers for me that I am successful this time!

I hope everyone has a good weekend (Me? I have to work!)!!!

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Wednesday, January 22, 2003

I got Avril tickets, just in case anyone was wondering...and my little sister finally decided that she wanted to go with me (Sorry Brett...but maybe you can buy one and end up getting lucky like at the AI concert!!!). Our seats are pretty good for first level. I didn't want to be on the floor (general admission is yucky!) so we got first level really close to the stage. Check out this map, we are in section 26...not too bad, right?

Ok, so the new American Idol is, well, not really stand outish (is that a word???). I mean, the first season was so new and fresh, something I had never seen before and this year it's just sorta...boring. Maybe this is because I have watched that stupid AI DVD one too many times (but come on, the head tilt and the smile, *winks* at Aimee, I can't help but to watch it over and over again!). But anyways, I have hopes that it will get better after tonight. It will, right guys?

Lastly, I hope you noticed that this place is once again Pocket Full Of Dreams...I had sorta divided TiffanyMarie.tk and Pocket Full of Dreams, but that was too hectic, trying to run two places at once (not to mention that they were basically the same thing and neither ever got updated). So, in the end, here we are again at Pocket Full of Dreams, because that is what I started with and well, I just like it best. The whole way it got started is kinda special...something I don't think anyone involved here will forget...(Come on dad, don't bring me down because I've got a pocket full of dreams...)!!!

Also be sure to check out the pic of Brett that is up on his journal (which he has not updated since forever ago, but anyways...), it's really a cute pic of him taken at my house before we left for the American Idol concert! See everyone later!!!

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Sunday, January 19, 2003

I worked graveyard on Friday night, so when 6:00 am Saturday morning rolled around I was a little ticked off that a day shift med aide wasn't there to do the narcotic count with me so I could go home. So, 6:45 rolls around, still no med aide. I was about to get on the phone and call my boss and tell her I have had enough of this, I'm leaving, fire me if you want, when a day shift med aide walked in, her face red and eyes swollen, she had obviously been crying. I now felt a little bad for being so angry that no one was there to relieve me.

She told me that her 17 year old little sister (who is the mother to an 18 month old daughter) had been hit by a truck the night before, that she was rushed to the hospital and was now having emergency surgery to relieve the pressure on her brain...she didn't know if her sister would live. She said that she had a feeling that it was her sister's boyfriend who hit her because they had had a fight the night before and now no one could find the boyfriend. She told me she was going to have to leave soon, to go to Seattle to the hospital where her sister is. I didn't know exactly what to say.

I offered to stay and do what I could (I have never done meds on day shift so I would be a little lost, but I would stay so she could go...), she told me no, to go home, everything would be taken care of. I felt awful...I didn't even know why she even came in, why she hadn't called in. I think that she must have been in shock, just going through the motions as though it was a normal day, you know?

I came back to work at 10:00 last night. I immediately asked the girls on swing shift how the day shift med aide was doing, how her sister was. They told me that her little sister is in a coma, they don't know what is going to happen. I didn't know what to say to anyone.

I think that I take so much for granted, that my life isn't going to change much until a lot later in life. Seeing someone who is my age going through something so incredibly awful with a sister who is the same age as mine really woke me up...you can never take anyone or anything in your life for granted. You really need to appreciate everyone special to you everyday and let them know this as often as possible...I know I will from now on.

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Thursday, January 16, 2003

Sad!!! Going over my past journal entries, I realize that almost every single entry has to do with Taylor...I don't know why that is!!! My whole life really isn't revolved around him (although you couldn't tell be this site!!!), so I have come to the conclusion that the reason I probably write about him on here is because my life really has nothing to do with him until I come online (which is a rare thing...too busy!) and start looking at things that have to do with him and his life and they are what I am thinking about when I update (rarely) this place...But anyways, I have decided that I am going to start writing about more relevant things here, things that have more to do with reality...

BRETT!!!! Where are you??? Call me if you are reading this because I wanna see if you wanna go to the Avril concert with me??? I don't have tickets yet, but I am gonna get some (hopefully!!!) and Amy doesn't wanna go (weird, huh?). But anyways, I hope you wanna go cause I don't wanna be the only nerd who wants to go...

And with that personal business taken care of...Guess who lost 6.6 pounds on their first week back at Weight Watchers??? ME!!!! I know it's a lot to lose in a week, especially when I don't have that much to lose, but hey, it's good motivation to keep me going!!! I just wanna get down to about 125 (about 15 pounds...damn holidays!) so I can reapproach the whole acting thing feeling confident about my looks...A guy at my work that I am majorly crushing on (damn age difference) told me I should go into modeling, but whatever!!!. Well, I'm gonna go do a little FIRMing right now, so talk to you later!!!

Love,
Tiffany Marie

Tuesday, January 14, 2003

Wow, so this picture really put things into perspective today...I have been totally drifting back into oblivion, my whole "Tay and Nat are unhappy, blah blah blah" world, and this picture could not have come at a better time...Look at how completely happy and in love with eachother they look, it's just absolutely beautiful. Taylor is happy with Natalie and they're life together as a family with Ezra. Read this article from In Style magazine that sure kicked me back into reality today:

"Taylor-Made For Her"
"Mmm...marry me," said Taylor Hanson to his bride, NATALIE ANNE BRYANT. And the singer's brothers added thir chorus of approval.

For Taylor Hanson, middle brother of the pop group Hanson ("Mmmbop"), cupid came in the form of a roadie named Romeo. Two years ago, following an Atlanta concert and teen fashion show,he introduced Hanson, now 19, to a model, Natalie Anne Bryant, 18. "I never thought my wedding story would begin, 'I met my wife at a Hanson concert,'" says the singer. Of course, dating a touring pop star isn't easy. "Natalie would fly out to see me for a day, then I'd visit her for a day," says Hanson. The couple clicked and Hanson was asking himself: Are you ready to propose? The answer came on a hill near his L.A. home. "There was a gust of wind, as if God was giving me a push," he says. Hanson presented Bryannt with a 2-carat Tiffany diamond. They got a more priceless gift in October: son Jordan Ezra.

The Ceremony: The two wed in a chapel at Callaway Gardens in Pine Mountain, GA., on June 8, amid candelabras and red roses. James Mitcham, owner of Details of the Gardens, also in Pine Mountain, provided flowers. "When we dated, I'd send Natalie roses," Taylor says. On hand for support: four groomsmen and three bridesmaids.

The Reception: Dinner for 60 overlooked a 22-foot waterfall at Callaway Gardens. Despite requests, Hanson refrained from singing. Says Taylor, "I was off duty for the night."

Ok, so the whole wind/god pushing him to propose thing is just to perfect (and the fact that the boy gave her a 2 carat Tiffany ring!)...better than any fantasy I ever had of Taylor proposing to me (Did I just admit that?)...So, I guess thats it, I am finally happy for Taylor and Natalie and I hope that they are happy together for the rest of their lives...

A couple more pics from the article:
Taylor and his groomsmen

Inside the chapel...Ok, I love this one too!!

Love,
Tiffany Marie