Engaging the Reader: How to Make Your Writing Come Alive

Show, don't tell

Your words are tools that help your readers create mental pictures in their minds. For example, it's one thing to say that "working out will make you feel more energetic." But if you say that "working out will enable you to walk up a flight of stairs without losing your breath," the reader can better visualize what you're saying. The first sentence is eight words. The second sentence is 16 words. But the first one is more abstract and harder to visualize.

Although being descriptive usually takes more words, a few extra words are worth achieving clarity. Never tell readers what they should think, say, see, or do. Show them by using specific language and concrete details. Involve their senses. Don't tell the reader that something will benefit them, show them how it will benefit them. Then you'll allow them to decide what to see, do, say, or feel.

But use this technique for special emphasis only. Remember HelpGrams must be concise. So avoid these types of sentence constructions sentence after sentence. Sprinkle your expert statement and your data points with descriptive sentences to strengthen your writing and the power of your message.

Avoid abstract language

Identify adjectives in your sentences, and replace them with specific nouns. Specific language holds and keeps the reader's attention, but abstract language sedates. Also, use examples. They strengthen your writing by illustrating the points you make. Remember, HelpGrams should arouse the reader's attention and should motivate them to take action. So give your readers the specific information they need to do so.

Use the active voice

Use the active voice unless there's no way to get around the passive voice. And use the passive voice only when you want to emphasize the object of the action, instead of the subject or the action itself. The active voice is more concise, energetic, and descriptive.

Put people in your verbs

William Zinsser refers to sentences without people as "concept sentences." In these sentences, an idea or concept performs the action instead of an actual person.

Revising Concept Sentences
Concept Sentence	Revision
Massage therapy is used to loosen tight muscles.	Doctors prescribe massage therapy to loosen the tight muscles of their arthritis patients.
Over-the-counter drugs are used to relieve pain.	Patients use over-the-counter drugs to relieve their pain.

Here are some additional examples of concept sentences from Zinsser's On Writing Well:

• The common reaction is incredulous laughter.
  
  
• Bemused cynicism isn't the only response to the old system.
  
  
• The current campus hostility is a symptom of change

Since a person doesn't perform the action in concept sentences, it's harder for the reader to visualize the activity. So put people in your verbs as much as possible. Although it may add more words to your sentences, it will make your writing more specific and engaging to the reader.

The content of this page is based on principles found in the following books:

100 Ways to Improve Your Writing
On Writing Well