A man with long black hair and a "dot" on his forehead stepped out of the helicopter and opened the door for its passengers.  Out stepped a beautiful young blond lady, who wore a white cape and was dressed in yellow.  She was escorted out by a teenager with silver hair and a trench coat.

Blonde Lady:  Tseng, turn off that loud thing.

Cool guy in tux with dot on forehead, Tseng:  Of course, Kesley.

(Tseng steps back inside the helicopter and turns off the motor, then steps out again)

    Kesley studied the man and his wife.  They wore standard Wutai garb.  The man wore a large black kimono and had a small pony tail, like all male Wutaians.  He was well built.  His wife also wore a long kimono, this one was pink, and she had her hair tied up in a bun.

Long blond haired beautiful yet not Tifaish lady, Kesley:  Sigh.  Why do Wutaians all look alike?

Man in Kimono:  You have a lot of nerve.

Kesley:  Ha!  You think you're so powerful, Godo, don't you?  You and you're stupid gods!  They
won't save you now!

(A fat man comes running up)

Fat man:  Lord Godo!  Lady Marai!

Large husky type person, Godo:  What is it, Gorky?

VERY large husky type person, Gorky:  I told you not to go!  Why didn't you listen to me?

Older Chekhov lookalike, Marai:  What?  And look like cowards in the face of our enemy?

Kesley:  He's right.  You probably shouldn't have come.

Godo:  Oh please.  We can take you on, and anything else you throw at us!

Kesley:  Really?  That's precisely the reason why I asked you to come here.

(Kesley draws her sword)

Godo:  I can easily defeat you!

Kesley:  But wait!  It's not just me!  I couldn't leave dear Marai out of the action without someone for her to take on, now could I?

(The teenager in the trench coat walks up and smiles)

Kesley:  Sephiroth, say hello.

Young teen in trench coat with big ass sword, Sephiroth:  Hi.

Kesley:  Sephiroth is one of our most gifted out of our new elite force, Soldier!

Marai:  Him?  But... he's only a boy!  He can't be more than... sixteen years old!

Kesley:  I'm extremely proud of him.

Kesley:  (whispers to Tseng)  And I'm especially glad that he didn't end up looking like his
hideous father.

Tseng:  Yeah.

Hojo:  HEY!

Marai:  I could easily destroy both of you.  I'm tired of this.  Prepare to die!

(Marai closes her eyes and starts concentrating power)

Marai:  Magic Change, Ultima!!!

(Tseng and Sephiroth brace themselves as they and Kesley are engulfed in a huge green explosion.
When it's over, none of them have been scratched and Kesley is holding up her sword and laughing)

Kesley:  Oh please.  Magic can do nothing to me.  Nothing you use could ever get past my runic blade.  It contains your stupid "god" abilities, too.

Marai:  How did...?

Godo:  So you called me aaaallll the way over here just to view your stupid soldier?

Kesley:  Oh, you'll pay for that remark.

Sephiroth:  Perhaps I should show them who the stupid one really is.

Kesley:  Sephiroth, Tseng, let's demonstrate to these losers the power of the Shinra!
 

    Sephiroth and Tseng sprang into action almost faster than Godo could react.  Almost. Godo quickly sprang out of the way as Sephiroth charged and Tseng's pistol shot flew by.  Gorky quickly came to Godo's aid by putting up a power barrier and reflect shield.  Kesley joined in and slashed at Godo, who parried with his sword.  The battle raged on through the rain, until
Marai finally decided to start cutting loose with the magic again.  Kesley quickly put up her runic blade to absorb the Ultima's blast, and Godo, seeing his chance, charged at her and would have ran her through had she not noticed him and quickly parried with her sword.  With her runic blade disrupted, Kesley took a hit as a huge blinding green light blasted her, Sephiroth, and Tseng to the edge of the cliff.  Kesley stood up, and had a really pissed off look on her face.

Kesley:  No more playing around.  Sephiroth! Finish off that damn magic pest!

(Sephiroth starts chanting)

Godo:  What?

Sephiroth:  Quake3!

(Godo, Gorky, and Marai are blasted by a huge earthquake)

Sephiroth:  Fire3!

(And they end up getting torched, too)

Sephiroth:  Ice3!

(And frozen)

Sephiroth:  Bolt3!

(Nothing.)

Sephiroth:  Eh?

Kesley:  Sigh.  Here.

(Kesley gives Sephiroth an ether potion)

Sephiroth:  Thanks!  Bolt3!

(Lightning blasts Godo, Gorky, and Marai to the ground)

Gorky:  YEOUCH!

Marai:  Magic?  But...

Kesley:  Told you he was gifted.  Kill them all.
 

Voice:  YUFFIE, WAKE UP!

(Big stick slams down hard on Yuffie's desk)

Short haired materia hunter, Yuffie:   YEEEEP!

(Yuffie quickly sits up and starts looking awake)

Yuffie:  Um, I was just.... reading my text book, Miss Kafan.

Lil' midget kid, Shake:  Sh'yeah, right!

Yuffie:  Shake, shaddup!

Shake:  Why should I?  At least I'm not the one falling asleep in class!

Yuffie:  Man, school sucks.  Why did summer have to end so quickly?

Long pony tail Mulan wannabe, Judith:  You should have done something useful with your summer.  You know, like finish your community service hours.

Yuffie:  Community service?!  I SAVED THE PLANET, DAMMIT!  If that's not community service, what is?

Judith:  So?  You didn't get anyone to sign off any community service hours for you.

Stereotypical teacher with glasses, Professor Kafan:  Stop talking in class!

Yuffie and Judith:  Sorry, Miss Kafan.

Yuffie:  (whispering)  No one ever appreciates me.

Shake:  (whispering)  That's because you're an idiot!

Kafan:  Okay, let's have a little review of last year, shall we?  Who can tell me the name of the commander and great hero at the battle of the Ruby Dessert?

Judith:  I CAN!  I CAN!

Kafan:  Miss Yuffie?

Yuffie:  HUH?  Um.... Staniv Whachisnam?

Kafan:  ........

Judith:  Uncle Staniv?  WTF?  Oh well.  I know!  Call on me!

Kafan:  Fine.  Judith?

Judith:  It was Garrant Kaishack, of course!

Yuffie:  Show off.

(Gorky walks in)

Gorky:  Ah ha!  How is everything going?

Kafan:  Godo's daughter seems to have forgotten her history lessons.

Yuffie:  History sux...

Gorky:  Don't worry about it!  Right after summer, no one remembers anything they learned in school anyway!

(Yuffie glares at Judith)

Gorky:  So, what did each of you do each summer?

Blond ponytail mix of multiple races Midgar interim, Lenore:  Well, I visited the Gold Saucer and met this stranger and after a whole bunch of trials and defeating a vile villain, I found out some really interesting stuff about my ancestors and heritage!

Judith:  I got the the First Annual Wutai award for Outstanding Academic Achievement in the Field of Excellence!

Shake:  I grew an inch!

Yuffie:  I embarked on a journey to get materia to make Wutai glorious again and ended up getting caught up with a bunch of other guys known as Avalanche where we fought an evil dictatorial corporation only to find out that some psycho they produced was going to summon a huge meteor to crush the planet and I went on a date with the leader but the one of the Avalanche's leader's girlfriends got killed by the psycho but managed to say a prayer that summoned the life stream and we found a whole neato bunch of stuff about how Cloud our leader was actually a clone of the psycho who by the way was Sephiroth the dastardly villain of the war and Cloud went psycho and huge weapons came up from the ocean to destroy the planet but we stopped them and Cloud came back but fell in love with Tifa for some stupid reason and the evil corporation Shinra got blown up by one of the weapons which was actually very wimpy compared to the other weapons like Ruby and Emerald and we all went to the northern crater and we stopped Sephiroth and killed him but the meteor crushed most of Midgar before the lifestream stopped it even though the stupid holy that Aeris prayed for didn't work and the planet was saved!

Dorky looking guy with glasses, Nathan:  Um....  I stayed at home?

Short red head with baseball cap over eyes, Marel:  Sigh... I watched my old school get crushed by that meteor Yuffie was talking about.

Gorky:  ............... Well, it seems like you all had a very.... er.... interesting summer.

Kafan:  Oh well.  Here are your project assignments that I told you about.

Lenore, Yuffie, Nathan, Marel, Judith, and Shake:  Groan....

Kafan:  Yuffie, Judith, and Shake will cover the war with Wutai, something which Miss Yuffie here seems to need to touch up on.

Yuffie:  (mumbling) Shaddup, b***h!

Kafan:  Lenore, Marel, and Nathan will cover that meteor incident we had over the summer.

Nathan:  No problem!  I'll just copy off of that big description Yuffie gave a short time back about her summer!

Yuffie:  Um, hello?!  WE ALMOST ALL DIED THEN!  Can't you people take that more seriously?  I should be praised as a hero for putting my a** on line for the planet!

Shake:  Why?  You never really did anything!

Yuffie:  Yes I did!

Shake:  No you didn't.  In fact, I bet Cloud could have saved the world without ever meeting you and nothing would have changed!

Yuffie:  What?

(The bell rings)

Kafan:  Well, that's the end of class.  You are all dismissed.

(Everyone starts packing up to leave)

Lenore:  Hey, Marel, I'm going to Yuffie's house to get some info for our project.  Wanna come?

Marel:  No thanks.  Um, Lenore?  Where are all the sailor suits?

Lenore:  Eh?

Marel:  I thought that the standard Wutai school uniform was a cute white blouse and blue skirt... you know, a sailor suit.

Lenore:  ....... You watch too much anime.
 
 

(Outside the school)

Happy go lucky skinny guy with hat, Staniv:  Hey!  Judith!  Yuffie!  So, how were your first classes of the school year?

Yuffie:  Nothing much.

Shake:  Yeah, Judith only made Yuffie look like an idiot in front of the whole class.

Yuffie:  (fuming)

Staniv:  Hey, don't make fun of her.  Yuffie's 17th birthday is coming up in November.  She has to pass the trial of Omni in a couple of days.

Shake:  She'll probably fail.

Yuffie:  (about to smack Shake)

Staniv:  Ah, Yuffie, maybe Judith could give you some pointers.  She passed the trial of Weapon over the summer.  And Shake passed the trial of speed like.... two years ago!

Shake:  :)

Yuffie:  Yeah, well, no stinky cave full of monsters is going to stop me.  That trial will be easy.

Staniv:  Whatever.  Good luck.

Judith:  Bye, Uncle Staniv.

(Staniv leaves)

Judith:  Well, Yuffie, should we go over to your house to work on the project?

Yuffie:  Why bother?  All we have to do is say, "Shinra started the war with Wutai.  Wutai embarked on a noble quest to expand its culture and help its people.  Wutai was kicking lots of Shinra ass.  Sephiroth mercilessly slaughtered Wutaian women and children, including the wife of the leader.  Garrant Kaishack saved Wutai by destroying the city where Sephiroth was trained, thus preventing more Sephiroths from being produced and destroying Wutai alltogether.  Wutai finally saw that the war was stupid, and asked for a peace treaty.  END!"

Judith:  That's it?

Yuffie:  Yep.

Judith:  That.... that sucks!  Surely we can think of something else to add to the presentation.

Yuffie:  Well, that's everything that we were taught.  I guess we could rummage through all those books at my house that I never bothered to read.

Judith:  Yeah, let's do that.
 

(Yuffie's house)

(A young girl about the same age as Yuffie is rummaging through Yuffie's stuff)

Yuffie:  Hey, I've discovered a Wutai savage that rummages through people's stuff for a living!

Black haired girl with red ribbon and white battle kimono, Nari:  Oh, hello!

Yuffie:  Who the $#*@ are you?!  And how the hell did you get into my house?

Nari:  Oh, I'm sorry.  My name is Nari Cheraye.  Is this your house now?  It's been such a long time...

Yuffie:  GET OUT!!!!!

Nari:  Sheesh.  Touchy.  Hey, this is a nice materia collection here.

Yuffie:  Don't touch that!

(Shake is laughing)

Nari:  Hey, maybe you could help me out.  You wouldn't happen to know anything about a ressurection materia, would you?

Yuffie:  Huh?  Ressurect?  As far as I know, there's no such thing.  Cloud spent a loooooooong time looking for one (He even petitioned a company called SquareSoft demanding to "complete FFVII" by putting back in "The ressurection process") and it was proven that it doesn't exist.

(Lenore walks in)

Lenore:  Hey, guys, what's up?  Um...

(Lenore glares at Nari)

Lenore:  Am I like disturbing something?

Nari:  What's this?

(Nari takes out a picture of Cloud from Yuffie's drawer)

Yuffie:  HEY!

Shake:  Oh, that's Yuffie's boyfriend.

(Shake snickers)

Yuffie:  This is sooooo stupid.  Could you get out of my house now?

Nari:  K.  Well, bye bye!

(Nari leaves)

Lenore:  What was that about?

Judith:  Beats me.
 

(Later....)



Shake:  Ok, this book tells us nothing...

Judith:  Hmm... What is this?  The Little Engine that Could?

Yuffie:  Gawd,

(Yuffie looks at all of the books on the floor)

Yuffie:  Well, this one is called, "Ode to the great god, Da-Chao.  May his omnipotent blubber encompass us all."

Judith:  It's getting dark.  I have to get home.

Shake:  Yeah.

(Shake and Judith leave)

Lenore:  Um, if you're wondering, I don't think ANYONE ever did make a book about the War.

Yuffie:  Well you could have told us sooner!

Lenore:  Sorry.  I was wondering about that boyfriend.

Yuffie:  Huh?

Lenore:  Ahem.  Nevermind.  Could you help me out with my project?  After all, you were there.

Yuffie:  But I thought we weren't supposed to get involved in each other's business, remember?

Lenore:  Yeah, but it'll only take a second.  Just tell me everything you know about the meteor incident, k?

Yuffie:  It's a long story.  And I wasn't there for the first quarter of it.

Lenore:  Hahaha.  You wouldn't have been there at all if I told your father where you went.

Yuffie:  Yeah?  Well, you wouldn't have been on your little adventure either if I ratted to your parents!

Lenore:  Hmm... well, anyway, what was that about the boyfriend that Shake mentioned?

Yuffie:  Shake is a lying idiot!

(Lenore is looking at the picture of Cloud)

Lenore:  Ah ha.  Yeah, whatever.  This is Cloud, isn't it?  The hero who saved the planet.  So, did you like him?

Yuffie:  What?!  Like HIM?  No way!  He's a jerk!

Lenore:  Ah.

(more serious now) Yuffie:  Besides... I can't.  He got married last month.

Lenore:  Oh?

Yuffie:  Yeah, he married his childhood girlfriend, Tifa.

Lenore:  How sweet!  Cloud, the knight in shining armour, finally returning to help the one he loves, and then they get married, happily ever after!  That's so romantic!

Yuffie:  Yeah...... happily ever after.... I guess some girl who always grated on his nerves and just came out of nowhere really didn't stand a chance against someone who he knew and loved since childhood...

Lenore:  Aeris?  Does it matter?  She died.

Yuffie:  No, not Aeris....... Someone much more important......... Dear Gawd...... Why didn't I do something?  I tried, I showed him how I felt!  But I guess I gave up when I saw that Cloud would never love me....

Lenore:  Umm..... Yuffie?

Yuffie:  And now, he's gone forever....

Lenore:  Hello?  I'm still here.

Yuffie:  And I couldn't do anything...

Lenore:  ........

(Lenore leaves)
 

    Yuffie picked up the picture, and stared at it, her eyes filled with tears.....
 

(Godo continues to stare at the picture)

Godo:  Gone forever....

Gorky:  Lord Godo!!!  Get to bed!  Sheesh!  Our leader shouldn't go to bed so late!  You have a busy day tommorow!

Godo:  Yeah, yeah.

(Godo sighs)

Godo:  Oh Marai, how I miss you.  It's been almost 16 years since that fateful moment.  Why couldn't I stop it?  Why couldn't I do anything?  Why did you have to do it?

Tiamat:  I hate to see a grown man cry    :_(

Godo:  But it's over.  You're gone now.  And I will always have to live with that.
 

(Yuffie puts the picture down)

Yuffie:  Always.

Chocobo Clock:  WARK!  Bedtime!  Wark!

Yuffie:  Well, good night then.  Sigh.  I'm talking to myself.

(Yuffie hops in bed)
 
 
 

Spooky phantom forest like music........
 

    The fire raged.  Everything was blurry.  Visions were scarred.  Screams of pain and war cries occurred in the distant background, as machine guns rattled and a slashing noise was made as swords cut through the air.  The fire continued to burn.

Yuffie:  HOLY SHIT!!!!!

(Yuffie quickly wakes up, glares at the fact that her house is on fire, and jumps out the glass window)

CRASH!!!!

Yuffie:  GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD!!!!!!!

(Yuffie glares at the broken glass on the floor)

Yuffie:  Oh man, I'm probably cut all over... gawd, what the hell.... stupid house burst into flames on me....

Wutai man:  Hey, you!  What are you doing standing out in the open like this?  GET DOWN!

Yuffie:  Huh?

(Yuffie and the man duck.  Machine gun bullets fly over their heads)

Yuffie:  Whoa!

Man:  The Shinra are invading!  Take shelter in the main pagoda!

(Man runs away)

Yuffie:  Shinra are invading?!  DAMMIT!  I thought the new head of Shinra, Reeve, was my friend!

(Two shinra soldiers run up to Yuffie)

Soldiers:  A Wutai type person!  Kill her!

(Yuffie easily beats the two soldiers because all Shinra soldiers are incompetant weaklings)

Yuffie:  Great.... wait a minute...

(Yuffie notices that her vision is blurred and that everything is fuzzy)

Yuffie:  War with Shinra?  This is a dream, isn't it?  Why am I dreaming about the war with Shinra?

(Yuffie glares at the broken window)

Yuffie:  Gawd, I hope I REALLY didn't do that in my sleep, or I'm going to really be hurting when I wake up in the morning.  Oh well.  Might as well go to the pagoda.

(Yuffie fights through several shinra soldiers as well as several insignificant monsters who have no place in the storyline but are just there.  She finally arrives at the pagoda)

Yuffie:  Woohoo!

(Yuffie enters)

(All is silent)

Yuffie:  Huh?

(A man's tears are heard.  The people of Wutai are surrounding a coffin, their heads low in mourning)

Godo (crying):  WHY!??

Gorky:  Lord Godo, I....

Godo:  THEY KILLED HER!!!  Sephiroth and Kesley viciously ruthlessly slaughtered her!

    Godo howled in anger.

Yuffie:  Sheesh.  Dad already told me that my mom was brutally slaughtered by the Shinra.  Who the hell is Kesley?

Tiamat:  I hate to see a grown man cry      :_(

Gorky:  Be glad that Yuffie is too young to realize what is going on.  It's a good thing she didn't get too attached to her mother, or she'd be crushed.

Yuffie:  Psh.  I was only one year old at the time.  This dream is gay.  When will I wake up?  I hope I don't have to fix that broken window.

(Everyone dissapears.  Yuffie is outside again)

Yuffie:  Hmm?

    A huge flash blinded Yuffie for a second.  When it was over, a figure slowly materialized.  It finally formed into a young man, a teenager, also roughly the same age as Yuffie (give or take a month).

Rough pompous semi spiky haird teenager, Brand:  Ah haha haha haa!  I've made it!  I finally got here!

Yuffie:  Huh?

Brand:  Yes, the great Brand!  Nothing can get in his way!  I AM INVINCIBLE!  Now that Sephy no longer crams up my space, I finally could get here!  Too bad he had to die like that, though.

Yuffie:  What the hell are you?

Brand:  Yes, I finally got into the dreams of the leader's daughter!  Our revenge starts here when I destroy you forever!

Yuffie:  The fuck?
 

    Sharp blades immediately protruded from Brand's sleeves and leggings.  With a laugh, he madly dashed towards Yuffie, cutting everything in the near vicinity with his frantic kicking and chopping.  Yuffie reacted quickly, jumping out of the way, and retaliated by filling the air with metal as her big ass shurikans flew towards Brand.  Brand, still laughing like that idiot Kefka, raised his hand and made a whole bunch of spiky sharp edged meteors slam into Yuffie.  Yuffie charged towards Brand like Greased Lightning, slashed him up close, jumped back, and chucked a shurikan into him before he could recover.
 

Brand:  Owy owy owy!  Dammit.  You're just as tough as you should be, I guess.  But I, yes, I, Brand, AM INVINCIBLE!  I can never die!  Ah haha haha haa!

(Brand dissappears)

Yuffie:  Ooooooooooook.  What a wierdo.  Will this stupid dream never end?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

    Lenore peeped around the room.  All was quiet.  She quickly glimpsed over and with a relief saw that Yuffie was still asleep.

Yuffie:  Gay.....

    Lenore ignored Yuffie's ramblings, and walked up to one of the cabinets.  She opened it up, took out the picture, and stared at it.  The picture of Cloud did nothing, as Lenore took it and tip toed out of the room.

Lenore:  Evil.... Maybe I'll just give Yuffie a hand here.  I'm not going to let a romance end in tragedy.  I shall help Yuffie out and save Cloud from the evil Tifa beast.

    Lenore left the room, as the chocobo clock tick-tocked on and on...