(THIS BROADCAST IS RATED TV-MA. IT FEATURES GRAPHIC VIOLENCE AND FOUL LANGUAGE. PARENTAL
DISCRETION IS ADVISED...)
(The scene opens with the original SWF logo on screen, as part of the opening for the first
SWF broadcast.)
Voice of Robert Jones: The SWF. The first of many firework filled nights.
(The old SWF logo explodes into thousands of pieces, which fly across the screen. We see
the new SWF logo, as "Wax Ecstatic" by Sponge plays.)
Chip: One year ago this week, the Supreme Wrestling Federation had its first on-air telecast,
as Triumphant Tuesday was broadcast live from Buffalo, New York here on NASN.
(Jagged Edge and Mr. America are battling in a cage match, as we see grainy footage of this
historic match.)
Chip: The SWF was formed out of the ashes of the old UEA, but it has taken on an exciting
life of its own, as veterans and top young talent have combined to make it one of the elite
wrestling leagues on the planet.
(Mr. Shhh is holding his World Title, flanked by Mr. Smith and Mr. Jones.)
Chip: Tomorrow night, the SWF will start its second year with its Birthday Blast spectacular,
featuring an unprecented six title matches, including the crowning of our first ever Television
champion.
(Footage of Sean McKenzie, standing face-to-face with Equalizer.)
Chip: But tonight, we celebrate, we honor, the first year of the Supreme Wrestling Federation,
as we bring you the matches chosen by the front office, the wrestlers and the fans as the very,
very best of Year One!
(Footage of Pagan brawling with Bones Douglas, Damien Grundy hitting Moon Dog Gator with a
sledgehammer, Zahadum accidentally hitting Lethal, God's Tears in the face of Johnny Ventures.)
Chip: All tonight on:
BEST OF THE SWF: ONE YEAR IN THE MAKING!
---------------------------------------
(Cut from the prerecorded opening to the interior of the SWF studios in Frenck Tower. We see
Chip Collins, dressed in a black tuxedo and tie, next to "The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen, who
has on a blue suit with a purple Polo tie.)
Chip: Welcome everyone, to this "Best of the SWF" special. I'm Chip Collins, along with the
man wrestling fans love to love...
Fool: "The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen.
Chip: Fans, you will want to set your VCR's, as we are about to bring you three hours of some
of the greatest action in SWF history. Some of the footage has only previously been seen on
Pay-per-view. Be advised that the action is often graphic and bloody, and the language
occasionally profane.
Fool: That's how we got the NEA to give us a grant to make this special.
Chip: We did no such thing.
(Chip moves over to stand in front of a giant picture of Camden Yards, site of the first SWF
pay per view.)
Chip: When the SWF first started, a stable known as the Underground moved in. This group of
men, led by "Beer Drinking" Doug Bacon, had dominated the old UEA, and expected to have the same
impact here.
Fool: The SWF needed a World Champion. To accomplish this, they set up a giant double
elimination tournament to crown their first ever champion. Doug Bacon dominated this event,
until he ran into a rising star by the name of Jagged Edge.
Chip: This match took place at our first ever pay per view, SWF World Title Mania, and you are
seeing it for the first time ever on TV. Here is the final match of our first World Title
tournament.
----------------------------------------------------
Doug Bacon vs. Jagged Edge (World Title Tournament Finals)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF World Title Mania Pay-per-view.
Oriole Park, Baltimore, Maryland
May 10, 1997
Announcers: Robert Jones, Tom Rogers and Captain Canuck)
-----------------------------------
JEJ: All right, lets get down to business. In this match the B-Side finalist must pin his
opponent, the A-Side finalist, twice in order to win. While the A-Side finalist needs
only pin his opponent once. This match is scheduled for No Disqualifications, No Count
Outs and On the line... The SWF World Championship!
[another loud pop]
RJ: Can you feel the excitement? It's electric folks! Electric!
JEJ: Introducing first. Currently in his corner with his manager Kim Kelly since he
was just here for his last match...
[some whistles]
JEJ: Hailing from Denver, Colorado and weighing in at 289lbs. Here is the
B-Side finalist and the master of the Shattered Dreams... Jagged Edge!!
["Me Killa" by Bones Thugs-N-Harmony plays as Jagged Edge walks into the
middle of the ring and raises his arms. Kim Kelly points at him as he flexes
for the crowd. He is booed pretty heavily.]
RJ: There is Jagged Edge. Most men would have just given up after losing the first
match, but Jagged Edge kept fighting and made it all the way to the finals. He's not
my favourite person, but you have to admire what he's done already tonight.
TR: Certainly. Edge is a hell of a wrestler, I like the guy, he's tough as nails and he
knows how to bend the rules in his favour. Here's the problem, he's facing the
Underground and frankly.. no one in the SWF is going to beat the Underground.
Period.
CC: Well if Edge expects to beat Doug he's got to pull out all the stops and I mean the
stuff I hate. He's got to hit him with chairs and throw him into posts, stuff like that.
Doug is fresher than Edge and only has to pin him once, the Jagged one needs any
advantage he can get.
RJ: What about Doug?
CC: He has to make sure he doesn't take Jagged Edge lightly and just do what he's been
doing already tonight. Stick to the gameplan and he'll be fine. After all, Jagged Edge
has yet to beat a member of the Underground in the SWF, and that's what Doug is and
that's the style Doug wrestles.
RJ: Boy it's nice to have you back with us Captain.
TR: Speak for yourself.
RJ: That's what I'm doing motormouth.
JEJ: and his opponent.
[Doug Bacon's heavy metal version of "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" starts playing]
JEJ: from Sudbury, Ontario. Weighing in at 340lbs. Being led to the ring by Paul
VonBraun, here is the A-Side finalist, a member of the Underground alliance and the
master of the Fried Bacon... Doug "Beer Drinking" Bacon!
[Paul VonBruan leads Doug Bacon through the Oriole's mouth and up the aisle. Beer
starts spraying out of the Oriole's eyes once Doug Bacon is halfway up the aisle and it
lands only in the aisle and not in the audience. Doug Bacon is met with loud boos as
well. The audience doesn't know who to cheer for. Paul VonBraun is carrying a six
pack of beer and he leaves it in Doug's corner. Doug still has some dry blood on his
face and wrestling gear]
TR: Look at that warrior Jones! Still covered in blood and he's out here fighting!
RJ: This match is set to... here comes Jagged Edge!
[Jagged Edge attacks Doug Bacon before the bell.
Jagged Edge executes a belly-to-back suplex.]
RJ: Right off the bat Jagged Edge goes after Doug Bacon and he nailed him with that
belly-to-back suplex! Now he's picking him up and here comes a DDT!
[Jagged Edge executes a DDT.
The Bell Rings]
RJ: Perfectly executed! He drove Bacon's head into the canvas as the bell rings and this
match is now official.
CC: Good strategy by Jagged Edge, he jumped on Bacon right away. That's what he has to
do, maybe get a quick pin and even up the odds a bit.
[Jagged Edge nails him with a tilt-a-whirl piledriver.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Did you see that move!
CC: Tile-a-whirl piledriver, that's one thing Doug didn't want to run into in the first seconds
of the match up.
RJ: Now a cover... Bacon kicks out.
[Jagged Edge nails him with a punch.
Jagged Edge attemps to place Doug Bacon on the turnbuckle, but Doug Bacon
blocks it.]
RJ: Edge gives him a shot and he's trying to lift Bacon up to the top... he can't do it.
CC: Doug's girth becomes an advantage early on. Remember though, it doesn't seem to
have stopped Jagged Edge from performing high impact moves. Now Edge has got him
in the DDT position again!
[Jagged Edge takes him down with a DDT.]
RJ: He nailed it! Doug Bacon's skull hits the mat again and the man from Denver is
all over the Canadian!
TR: That damn early attack has hurt Doug big time! He wasn't ready for him and Edge
hasn't stopped taking it to him yet so he hasn't been able to turn things around. It'll
happen though. Just wait. Paul will come up with soemthing.
CC: Yes, I saw that match, very disappointing finish because of the despicable VonBraun.
RJ: Jagge Edge picks Doug Bacon up and he's setting him up for either a power bomb or a
pildriver. Either way Bacon's in trouble!
[Jagged Edge catches him in a power bomb.]
RJ: What impact! He drove Bacon's 340lbs down onto the mat at an amazing speed!
The whole stadium heard that one. Edge is looking for the first fall...
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: No! He can't hold Bacon down, but he's not going to give up. Edge pops right back up
and he's heading off the ropes!
[Jagged Edge runs into the ropes.
Jagged Edge misses with a shoulderblock.]
RJ: Bacon moves out of the way there!
TR: and look what he found, Edge has missed himself right into trouble!
[Doug Bacon nails him with a spinning power bomb.]
RJ: Wow! What a move. Doug Bacon crushes Jagged Edge and goes for the pin.
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Now it's Jagged Edge's turn to kickout and frustrate his opponent. Huge
power bombs aren't going to stop these inhuman monsters, so what is?
CC: That's what we're here to find out. I'd love to see how one of these men is
going to be able to hold the other down. I don't see either of them quitting, not
now, not after all this.
[Doug Bacon nails him with a backdrop driver.]
RJ: Another nice move by Bacon. Now where's he going? Doug Bacon is heading
up to the third turnbuckle! Doug Bacon is on the top rope.
TR: This is trouble for Jagged Edge!
[Flashes go off all over the building
Doug Bacon executes a flying bodypress.]
CC: No way!
RJ: He nailed it! Flying bodypress by the 340lbs Bacon!
TR: New champion!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.
Doug Bacon complains about a slow count.]
RJ: No! Jagged Edge dug deep down and kicked out! How did he kick out after
340lbs flying off the top rope and hitting him? I just don't know.
TR: Doug isn't happy with Joe Camel's crap, I'm sick of this guy and his slow
counts! We need a real referee damn it!
CC: Don't start blaming Joe, he has done a great job tonight and is still going
strong.
RJ: Bacon back to action, he runs the ropes.
[Doug Bacon runs into the ropes.
Doug Bacon gives him a short lariat, but Jagged Edge doesn't budge.]
RJ: Uh Oh! Uh Oh! Look at the look in the eyes of the monster Jagged Edge.
That didn't even budge him! Now he's going to try his luck off the ropes.
[Jagged Edge runs into the ropes.
Jagged Edge hits Doug Bacon with an elbow.]
RJ: Ouch!
TR: He had better pay Doug's dentist bill!
RJ: Now Bacon's set up again for the DDT...
CC: He's waiting too long Robert.
[Jagged Edge goes for a DDT, but Doug Bacon counters it with a backdrop.]
RJ: He did wait too long and he pays the price!
TR: but Doug's tired. They both stumble back to their feet.
[Jagged Edge whips Doug Bacon into the ropes, but Doug Bacon reverses it.
Doug Bacon goes for the Running Forearm Smash, but Jagged Edge counters it with
a duck-down move.]
RJ: Reversal and here comes Bacon!... Edge ducked out of the way and Oh no! Look
where Doug Bacon has found himself
TR: AH! He's set up!
[Jagged Edge takes him down with a spinning power bomb.]
RJ: Did you see that?! Jagged Edge just connected big time on Doug Bacon. Now
can he get the first fall.
CC: Bacon looks down and out!
TR: GET UP!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, Paul VonBraun distracts Joe Camel.
Loud boos]
CC: That low down dirty rat! Ban him from ringside Joe!
TR: Quit your crying Canuck, it's all legal!
RJ: Now Edge is trying to hoist Bacon up again!
[Jagged Edge attempts to place Doug Bacon on the turnbuckle, but Doug Bacon
blocks it.]
RJ: He can't do it!
[Jagged Edge goes for a belly-to-back suplex, but Doug Bacon counters it with
an elbowsmash.]
RJ: Right to the jaw!
TR: That hurts.
[Doug Bacon takes him down with a Russian legsweep.
Joe Camel is back on the job.]
RJ: Russian legsweep takes Jagged Edge down, now Doug Bacon is hoisting him up.
This can only mean one thing! They're both heading to the top rope!
[Doug Bacon places Jagged Edge on the turnbuckle.]
TR: You tried your best...
[Doug Bacon executes the Fried Bacon and goes for the pin.
The crowd gasps]
TR: and you failed!
RJ: FRIED BACON! Doug Bacon nailed the Fried Bacon!
CC: I can tell you from experience that move is hell! There's not way Jagged Edge is
getting up.
TR: The moral of the story is... never tr..
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, KICKOUT.]
RJ: NO!
TR: WHAT!?
RJ: Jagged Edge blasted out of that cover! The Fried Bacon didn't keep him down and
he bursts up. Doug Bacon is in a state of shock.
CC: That's amazing! How did he kick out of the Fried Bacon after all he's gone through?
It's hard enough normally.
[Jagged Edge executes a spinning power bomb.]
RJ: Out of no where!
TR: Oh gawd!
RJ: and the cover.
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, three.]
RJ: He got him! He got him! Jagged Edge has pinned Bacon!
TR: What? No!! How did he? I mean... what the!
CC: That came from deep inside Jagged Edge, he mustered up everything he had to
kick out of the Fried Bacon and now that awesome move.. that's a 340lbs man he
picked up and slammed like it was nothing! This man is hungry for gold, there doesn't
seem to be anything that will stop him!
TR: Doug was caught off guard, no one ever kicks out of the Fried Bacon and he got hit
with that move right after. That was just a freak fluke. Look what Doug has done tonight,
he took every once of vicious punishment Phoenix and 2 other men had for him and he just
kept fighting and fighting, he's not about to let this ruin his shot at the gold! You just
watch!
RJ: I guarantee you this, as Bacon and Edge both take a bit of a breather in their corner and
talk things over with their managers, both these men are gonna go until they just can't go
any more. They are going to give it their all and this is going to be a hell of a match the
rest of the way.
JEJ: Jagged Edge has won the first fall, therefor, this match has now become... SUDDEN
DEATH!
[The Bell rings]
RJ: We're into sudden death now, all you'll need is the edge of your seat folks!
[They lock up.
Doug Bacon runs into the ropes.
Doug Bacon goes for a flying forearm, but Jagged Edge counters it with
a duck-down move.]
RJ: Jagged Edge gets himself out of the way and Doug Bacon flies over him and hits
the mat. Now Edge is walking over to Bacon, what's he going to try?
CC: It looks like a Gorilla press coming up Robert.
[Jagged Edge goes for a Gorilla Press, but Doug Bacon blocks it.]
RJ: Bacon blocks it, he's too fresh to let that happen... oh wait! Doug Bacon just
tossed Jagged Edge to the top rope like a rag doll!
TR: and he's following him up Jones, the "I don't get hurt by a kick in the nads" man
is about to go for a little ride!
[Doug Bacon nails him with a front-layout superplex.
The crowd gasps]
RJ: Whoa! Did you see that! They both flew off that top rope and Jagged Edge hit
the canvas hard!
TR: No getting up from tha..
[Jagged Edge sits up.]
TR: What?!
RJ: Jagged Edge just pops right back up. That's the adrenaline, it's flowing through
the veins of both these men and helping them accomplish amazing feats. What action
folks! Doug Bacon doesn't look happy.
[Doug Bacon whips Jagged Edge into the turnbuckle.
Doug Bacon charges into the corner.]
RJ: Oh!
CC: Did Doug Bacon ever slam into Jagged Edge! Wow!
TR: Did you see how fast that 340lbs was moving? This guy is championship materiel Canuck!
CC: Don't I know that, I've seen what Bacon can do, but never count Edge out either. They're now
on an even playing field.
RJ: Jagged Edge stumbles out of the corner... and he's not going far! Doug Bacon caught him...
TR: Now Edge is going for a ride again!
[Doug Bacon executes a jack-knife power bomb.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Jack-knife!... only two! These men are running on instinct now Captain.
CC: They've already wrestled 3 matches each, plus the first fall of this match, and they've
taken vicious move after vicious move. There is no more thinking and plotting, just
action.
TR: Don't forget about the managers on the outside though, they can still think and plot.
[Doug Bacon goes over to his corner and chugs down a beer.]
CC: Warning: Beer can cause people to ruin their lives.
TR: Oh shut up you walking public service add. This damn thing is uncensored baby!
[Jagged Edge sits up]
TR: Ah!
RJ: Jagged Edge pops up again! Now he's stalking Doug Bacon, Bacon hasn't noticed him!
Now he does!
[Jagged Edge executes a choke slam.]
RJ: But it's too late!
[Jagged Edge takes him down with a belly-to-back suplex.
Jagged Edge flexes to the crowd.]
RJ: Now would you look at that, even in a championship match that means so much
Edge still takes time to show off! That's despicable! Hey! Bacon is up! Now it's
Edge who's being stalked!
[Doug Bacon places Jagged Edge on the turnbuckle.
Doug Bacon nails him with a belly-to-back superplex.]
TR: Oh yeah!
RJ: Jagged Edge got tossed off the top rope and than all of Bacon's weight followed
him and crushed him! Man! Now Bacon picks Jagged Edge up by the hair.
CC: Dirty tactics.
TR: You're damn right, when there are no disqualifications you take advantage!
[Doug Bacon whips Jagged Edge into the turnbuckle, but Jagged Edge reverses it.
Jagged Edge charges in with a jumping side kick.]
RJ: The whip is reversed and whoa! It looks like Doug Bacon's head snapped back!
CC: gorgeous jumping side kick by Jagged Edge!
[Jagged Edge takes him down with a series of punches.]
RJ: Now he's pounding away at Doug Bacon who slumps to the ground. Jagged
Edge is a mad man in there! He's lifting Bacon up over his head!
TR: No way! Not gonna happen!
[Jagged Edge nails him with a Gorilla Press.
Jagged Edge throws Doug Bacon out of the ring.
the crowd gasps]
RJ: He did it! Jagged Edge lifted Doug Bacon over his head and threw him over the
top rope! That was absolutely astounding!
CC: What power! He may have a 51 pound weight disadvantage, but Jagged Edge
looks like he can match power with Doug Bacon!
TR: I'm not worried, we're headed to the outside where Doug loves to play, just
ask Phoenix baby!
RJ: Jagged Edge follows him out and we're going to see this falls count anywhere
match start to live up to it's name!
[Jagged Edge goes through the ropes.
Kim Kelly hands Jagged Edge a chair.]
CC: Oh no, not this stuff again!
TR: Damn right!
[Jagged Edge hits him with the chair.
There is a loud thud as the crowd gasps
Doug Bacon is busted wide open.]
RJ: Did you hear that!? Did you see that?!
TR: violence personified! I love it, now kick out Doug or I won't be having as
much fun!
RJ: The cover as Joe Camel has hustled to the outside.
[Jagged Edge is going for the pin.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Only two, and these two are duking it out on the outside! Remember the last
Falls Count Anywhere match we announced?
CC: Oh, don't remind me!
RJ: Jagged Edge is the master of this match!
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Jagged Edge throws Doug Bacon over the guardrail.]
RJ: The match has spilled into the fans! This is going to get ugly!
TR: It's already gotten ugly Jones! This is great! The winner, Doug, will deserve it!
CC: I've got to do something so no one is hurt!
[Captain Canuck leaves his announcing position and runs into the crowd pushing
everyone back out of the way wherever the action goes.]
TR: That idiot! They were gonna get involved, that would have been more fun!
[Jagged Edge whips Doug Bacon into the guardrail.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.]
RJ: and into the guardrail from the other side goes Doug Bacon! He's in a world
of hurt motormouth!
TR: He sure is, but Phoenix did the same thing and who won that match?
RJ: Bacon is up and he continues to throw punches, these two are brawling like mad
men!
TR: With the gold on the line!
[Doug Bacon goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but Jagged Edge blocks it.
Jagged Edge flings Doug Bacon over a row of chairs.]
RJ: Blocked and Doug Bacon goes flying! I can't believe what we're seeing, thank
goodness the Captain got those fans out of there, they could have been hurt. This is
crazy! This is crazy! Now VonBraun is going to get involved again!
[Paul VonBraun comes from behind, but Jagged Edge nails Paul VonBraun.
Loud pop]
RJ: Paul VonBraun gets a shot to the had and he flies back over the guardrail. Jagged
Edge tosses Doug Bacon with him and they're brawling in the aisle!
[They're brawling up the aisle.
Doug Bacon sets up a table.]
RJ: Bacon has a table set up! What's he going to do with that?!
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Doug Bacon throws Jagged Edge over the guardrail.]
RJ: Oh no! Back over the guardrail again! No rest for the Captain, or these two warriors.
[Paul VonBraun hands Doug Bacon a fire extinguisher.]
RJ: What did VonBraun just hand to Bacon? That can't be...
TR: It is! A fire extinguisher Jones! Jagged Edge is about to be put out of commission!
[he laughs] This is great!
[Doug Bacon hits him with the fire extinguisher.]
RJ: Wow! The hit with the fire extinguisher knocks Jagged Edge back over the
guardrail again and now they're brawling up the aisle, I can't believe Jagged Edge
got back to his feet!
[They're brawling down the aisle.
Doug Bacon executes a Russian legsweep.]
RJ: Legsweep takes a tired Jagged Edge down and Doug Bacon is heading back to the
ring for something...
TR: A beer!
[Doug Bacon goes over to his corner and chugs down a beer
Paul VonBruan hands Doug Bacon an umbrella]
TR: Worth while trip, he gets a beer and an umbrella.
RJ: Doug Bacon heads back down the aisle again as Jagged Edge is just getting to his feet.
TR: Not for long!
[Doug Bacon hits him with the umbrella.
The crowd gaps, and the hardcore marks continue to go nuts as they have all match]
RJ: Jagged Edge drops to the floor and Doug Bacon jumps on top of him.. hey.. where are
they headed!?
TR: It looks like.. no way!
RJ: Jagged Edge and Doug Bacon have just brawled their way back through the Oriole's mouth, or
beak if you will, and are inside the Bullpen! We can't see a thing! Get a camera in there! Captain...
Captain can you hear me.
CC: Yes I can Robert.
RJ: Can you follow the action out there for us while we get a camera.
CC: Sure thing. Ok, I'm just making my way to the bullpen now... Whoa! I didn't
want to see this, they're just tearing each other apart! Now one of them just got
slammed into the benches, they just keep brawling! OK, Doug's in control.. he's trying
for a Norther Lights Suplex it looks like.. but he can't do it. Jagged Edge blocked it and
they've started throwing punches again! Now they're coming your way again guys! This is
sick!
[They're brawling up the aisle.]
RJ: Back in the aisle come these two men who are killing each other for the gold! Now
Kim Kelly is making her way down the aisle!
TR: Get her out of there, she'll distract Doug Bacon with her.. um.. assets!
RJ: Damn it motormouth, quit being so superficial!
TR: But I'm a man, I have to be.
RJ: #1, that's debatable, #2, that's despicable!
[Kim Kelly comes from behind and distracts Doug Bacon.]
RJ: Kelly has Bacon's attention.
TR: and mine.
RJ: Jagged Edge is pulling something out of his tights!
[Jagged Edge pulls brass knuckles out of his tights.]
RJ: He's got brass knuckles!
TR: Oh crap! I know what Jagged Edge can do with his damn brass knuckles!
[Jagged Edge hits him with the brass knuckles.]
RJ: Bacon flies over the guardrail and it's taken into the fans again! Here comes
Captain Canuck again!
CC: This is hard work guys!
TR: Sissy!
[They're brawling behind the guardrail.
Jagged Edge catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.]
RJ: Belly-to-Belly into the seats! I don't believe what I'm seeing!
TR: This rules! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Oh crap, he's gonna try to pin Bacon!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
TR: Yes!
RJ: Bacon kicks out! This is unbelievable! How are these men kicking out after
being brutalised like this! Is there anything that will hold them down in this sudden
death battle?!
TR: I don't know Jones, I don't know what they can do to win. Here come Paul!
[Paul VonBraun comes from behind and distracts Jagged Edge.]
TR: Great job by Paul to take the momentum away from Jagged Edge by distracting him.
RJ: Now Bacon lunges at Jagged Egde and they both fall over the guardrail and back in
the aisle we go!
[They're brawling up the aisle.
Jagged Edge is busted wide open.]
RJ: A shot to the head got Jagged Edge.. and now he's bleeding too! Both men have open cuts
on their faces, both men are ignoring the pain, both men are battling until the death for
the Supreme Wrestling Federation Championship!
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Doug Bacon throws Jagged Edge over the guardrail.]
RJ: Back into the fans we go, and Joe Camel is having a difficult time keeping up, but he's doing his best.
[Doug Bacon takes him down with a Russian legsweep.
Doug Bacon takes him down with a short lariat.]
RJ: Doug Bacon really connected with that lariat, now the cover!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, shoulder up.]
RJ: He can't keep Edge down.
[Doug Bacon takes him down with a Russian legsweep.
Doug Bacon whips Jagged Edge into the guardrail.]
RJ: Another legsweep and Edge tastes steel again! They both go over the guardrail
and the action has spilled to the aisle. It's been forever since these men were
actually in the ring! How can they stand this?
TR: I don't know.
[They're brawling down the aisle.
They're brawling up the aisle.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.]
RJ: Look at this, they just keep pounding on each other and pounding on each other!
Brutality, pure brutality!
TR: That's what the hunger for gold does to people Jones. Oh no!
RJ: Jagged Edge is sneaking up behind Bacon, could Bacon's title dreams be
shattered?
TR: Nice pun.
RJ: Thanks, I kinda liked it myself.
[Jagged Edge goes for the Shattered Dreams, but Doug Bacon blocks it.
Jagged Edge hits him with the brass knuckles.
Jagged Edge hits him with the brass knuckles.]
RJ: It's blocked, but the brass knuckles aren't! Doug Bacon drops to the cement floor.
TR: Damn those infernal knuckles! Take them away you stupid camel!
[They're brawling behind the guardrail.
Jagged Edge throws Doug Bacon over the guardrail.]
RJ: Back over the guardrail goes Doug Bacon, and with authority!
TR: Edge is following quickly, and he's picking up Douggie.
[Jagged Edge whips Doug Bacon into the guardrail.]
TR: Who tastes steel again! Damn it! This just isn't right!
RJ: Now Bacon is picked up again and...
[Jagged Edge takes him down with a spinning power bomb.]
RJ: he's dropped down viciously by that power bomb! This could do it!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, thr...]
RJ: New champio..
[kickout.]
TR: No, no, no! Not so fast Jones! Bacon is still alive and back on his feet!
RJ: How are they doing this?
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Paul VonBraun hands Doug Bacon a road sign.]
RJ: A road sign! Where is VonBraun finding this stuff!
TR: Batter up!
[Doug Bacon takes a swing at Jagged Edge with the road sign, but
he gets out of the way.
Jagged Edge snatches the road sign from him.]
RJ: He missed! Now Jagged Edge grabs the roadsign!
TR: Uh Oh!
[Jagged Edge hits him with the road sign.]
RJ: Home run! Doug Bacon drops to the floor after being clobbered with that road
sign! VonBraun's plan backfired!
TR: That's a first!
[Jagged Edge goes for a punch, but Doug Bacon reverses it.]
RJ: Edge's punch blocked and Doug Bacon comes back with one of his own. Now he's
back to his feet again! Bacon can take more punishment than a sony sportsman!
[Doug Bacon goes for a short lariat, but Jagged Edge counters it with
a duck-down move.]
RJ: Edge ducks and Doug Bacon goes flying. Now the Jagged one is moving over
to the tables. I guess we can all see what's coming up.
TR: Table action!
[Jagged Edge sets up a table.
They're brawling inside the ring area.]
RJ: Doug Bacon lunged at Jagged Edge and they both fly away from the table.
TR: Edge doesn't look pleased.
[Jagged Edge throws Doug Bacon over the guardrail.]
RJ: and back into the fans!
[Jagged Edge executes a spinning power bomb.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
RJ: He hit that power bomb again! What a move... but he can't keep Doug Bacon down!
TR: I don't think it's possible to pin Doug Bacon Jones, he got lucky once and Doug will]
not let it happen again! It's that Sudbury blood!
[Jagged Edge goes for a piledriver, but Doug Bacon counters it with a backdrop.
In turn, Jagged Edge counters it with a sunset flip.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Backdrop, but no, now a sunset flip, and Bacon kicks out! All this is going on
in the fans folks! In the fans! The Captain continues to clear the fans out of harms way.
[Kim Kelly tosses Jagged Edge a fire extinguisher.]
TR: She's got brains too! This is trouble for Doug!
RJ: Not the fire extinguisher again!
[Jagged Edge takes a swing at Doug Bacon with the fire extinguisher, but
he gets out of the way.
Doug Bacon snatches the fire extinguisher from him.]
TR: Strike!
RJ: Edge missed! Now Bacon grabs the extinguisher!
TR: Put him out for good Bacon!
[Doug Bacon hits him with the fire extinguisher.
Doug Bacon is going for the pin.]
RJ: Oh no! Jagged Edge falls and rams his back into the seats. Now Bacon is looking
for the cover.. Joe Camel runs over.
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: Jagged Edge kicked out! Neither of these men will die, neither of these men will let
themselves be put away!
TR: What have we seen already in this match Jones? Fire extinguisher, Chair, Road Sign,
Brass Knuckles, Fighting in the Bullpen, Powerbombs onto chairs! As a famous
man would say.. "Good Gawd!"
RJ: Now Bacon brings Jagged Edge back up, and he's got him in position!
[Doug Bacon catches him in a power bomb.]
RJ: Power bomb onto the concrete floor! This is too much!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two, shoulder up.]
RJ: Jagged Edge gets his shoudler up just in time! So close!
TR: Not close enough!
[Doug Bacon flings Jagged Edge over a row of chairs.]
RJ: Over the chairs and they are once again heading back over the guardrail.
It's gotten to the point where getting flung over a row of chairs means nothing!
These athletes are superhuman, I just can't say that enough!
[They're brawling up the aisle.
Doug Bacon knocks Jagged Edge into the ringsteps.]
TR: Step all over him Bacon!
RJ: Right into the steps! That made some sound!
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Jagged Edge knocks Doug Bacon into the ringsteps.]
RJ: Now Bacon hits the steps!
TR: Hey, what's this!
[Kim Kelly hands Jagged Edge a road sign.]
TR: That bitch!
RJ: Tom! Control yourself!
TR: Bite me!
RJ: Bite me.. how lame. Jagged Edge has a road sign folks!
[Jagged Edge hits him with the road sign.]
RJ: Oh no! But Doug Bacon is still stumbling around....
[Jagged Edge catches him in a reverse DDT.]
RJ: Not for long! What a move! Can he hold Bacon down now!?
[Joe Camel counts: One, two]
TR: KICKOUT!
[thr... kickout.]
RJ: He did! Oh was that close! Bacon did kickout at the last second!
TR: Man o Man! I'm gonna have a heart attack out here!
RJ: Edge is still coming at him!
[Jagged Edge catches him in a Northern Lights suplex.
Joe Camel counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
RJ: So close! So close!
[Jagged Edge reenters the ring.]
TR: WHAT!?
RJ: Jagged Edge has walked back up the steps into the ring! After ages on the outside
these two want to end in right in the middle of this ring, if this match will ever end!
TR: Doug is on his way back too!
[Doug Bacon follows him back in.
Jagged Edge is bleeding profusely.]
RJ: Look at the blood pouring down the face of Jagged Edge! Now they're staring
each other down.
TR: Does it get any better than this Jones?
RJ: No, plain and slimple, no!
[Jagged Edge gives the sign for the Shattered Dreams.]
TR: That cocky bastard!
RJ: Jagged Edge has just told the world he intends on putting Doug Bacon to sleep!
TR: Doug Bacon is going to fry this pukes brains!
RJ: We're long into this marathon match of brutal violence and still no one has an
edge! No pun intended. Here comes the Jagged one!
[Jagged Edge goes for a tilt-a-whirl piledriver, but Doug Bacon blocks it.
Doug Bacon catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.]
RJ: Blocked and he caught him! Big time belly-to-belly!
TR: Pin him! Pin him!
[Joe Camel counts: One, two]
RJ: Doug Bacon has wo...
[KICKOUT.]
RJ: No! I don't belive it! and Neither does Bacon!
TR: What?
RJ: Jagged Edge powered out of that pin and he's going right after Bacon....
[Jagged Edge executes the Shattered Dreams.]
TR: NO!!! NO!!!
RJ: SHATTERED DREAMS! He locked it on!!
TR: OK Doug, fight it, fight like you've never fought before!
RJ: So much has been taken out of these men in this match and they are both slumping
down to the ground. The Shattered Dreams is locked on right in the middle of the ring!
TR: Paul... do something!
RJ: Now Joe Camel is going to test the arm!
TR: Come on Doug! Come on!
RJ: He lifts it up once... it dropped!
TR: Doug, you're the only hope, do it yourself man! Come on!
RJ: He lifts it up a second time.. it dropped! Doug Bacon looks like he's out!
TR: Come on Doug!!! Please!!
RJ: Look at the blood and sweat all over both men! These men are warriors! Now
Joe Camle goes to check for the third time...
TR: Do it for the Baconheads!
RJ: IT DROPPED! IT DROPPED!
TR: Nooooo!!!!
RJ: Jagged Edge has overcome the odds! He is the first SWF WORLD CHAMPION!!!
TR: Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! There shouldn't have even been this match! Damn
that Yvette and his stupid ideas!
RJ: All night the Underground and been a thorn in Jagged Edge's side, the attack by
Mr. America to start the night off, than Dr. Hate using that to his advantage to get the win,
now Doug Bacon. These two warriors wrestled the greatest match I have ever seen in
my wrestling career. They put absolutely everything on the line for the gold and they
are both champions in my book. I may not like either of them, but you have to respect them.
JEJ: The winner of the match... AND NEW SWF WORLD CHAMPION! Jagged Edge!!
["Me Killa" by Bone Thugs-N-Harmony resumes playing. The crowd stays silent for a
period... than they all stand and start to clap and cheer]
RJ: The crowd doesn't like them either, but they put on one hell of a show and this
fantastic crowd appreciates it. Jagged Edge looks like the happiest man alive!
[Doug Bacon rolls out of the ring and smashes a table. He grabs his beer and chugs one
down. He and Paul return to the dressing room.]
--------------------------
(Return to Chip and The Fool in the studio.)
Chip: An incredible evening as the legendary Jagged Edge beat the equally legendary Doug Bacon
to become the first SWF World Champion.
Fool: And exactly how long did Mr. Legend hold that belt?
Chip: Well, he did...
Fool: ...I'll tell you how long! Ten days! What a title reign!
Chip: Well, Jagged Edge did go on to become the only Triple Crown champion in SWF history. As
for Doug Bacon, he became the longest reigning SWF World Champion ever. We look forward to
seeing him tomorrow night at Birthday Blast.
Fool: I know Equalizer does.
Chip: When we continue with Best of the SWF, we'll see the infamous Mall Brawl.
----------------
("Wax Ecstatic" by Sponge plays as we see footage of Equalizer Face Planting Vigilante.)
Voice: One was the longest reigning International Champion of all time.
Equal: Born from fire, raised to suffer, and destined to rule the ring!
(Footage of McKenzie pinning HardRock.)
Voice: The other is the two-time International Champ.
Sean: Equalizer's Kingdom... the Wonderful World of Disney... where if you wish real
hard ye dreams will come true.
Voice: When they get together to fight for the International Title, it's going to be...a blast.
(The image bursts into a cloud of confetti, then the Birthday Blast logo.)
Voice: SWF Birthday Blast. Tomorrow night on pay-per-view.
----------------
(We return to the studio, where Chip Collins and Tim Thorsne are standing in front of a giant
picture of Desperado and Jesse Aires, fighting inside an elevator in the Mall of America.)
Chip: We're back with more of the Best of the SWF.
Fool: The easiest night of work I've had so far in this place.
Chip: As the Fool alluded to earlier, Doug Bacon defeated Jagged Edge for the World Title, with
assistance from the Underground. Meanwhile, then Vice-President Brian Frenck was placed in
charge of the tournament to crown a Toughman Champion.
Fool: This tournament took place over the course of two weeks at the Mall of America in
Minnesota. As fate would have it, the two most bitter rivals in the SWF at that point were
Amarillo's own Desperado, and the man from the Badlands, Jesse Aires.
Chip: These two would face each other in the semifinals of the Tough Man Title tournament. It's
a match the SWF is still paying for. Literally.
----------------------------------------------
Desperado vs. Jesse Aires (Mall Brawl match)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Slaughterhouse.
Mall of America, Bloomington, MN
May 31, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
BF: Rod, I see that you have a list in front of you. What is on that
list?
RR: Well, Brian, on this list, I have 2 wrestlers. The first wrestler,
is from the Southwestern part of the United States and weighs 237
pounds. Jesse Aires, Come on Down!!
["Wherever I May Roam" by Metallica blares as Jesse walks to the
platform. The crowd cheers him on.]
RR: And his opponent is here with his manager Sean O'Brien. He is from
Amarillo, Texas, weighing in at 270 pounds, please welcome Desperado!!
["American Pie" by Don McLean plays as Desperado and Sean O'Brien make
their way to the platform. The crowd boos heavily.]
VM: This is the rematch that many people have been waiting to see.
However Desperado and Aires are not playing this up to be a big rivalry.
As far as they're concerned, this is just another match.
BF: All right guys, 2 weeks ago, you had the most brutal match in all of
SWF history. I'm sure I speak for the fans when I say, Let's see if we
can top that! Now let's spin the wheel!
[Booker Frenck spins the wheel. A giant scoreboard above the wheel
displays the types of matches as they go by. Scaffold match, Hot coal
match, Ladder match and then finally stops on Mall Brawl Death match.]
BF: It's a falls count anywhere in the Mall Death Match! If you guys
would head...
[Jesse Aires attacks Desperado before the bell.
Booker Brian Frenck dives out of the way.
Jesse Aires nails him with a side suplex.
Desperado takes him down with a powerslam.
The bell rings.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, kickout.]
VM: For two men who have been saying there isn't rivalry going on, they
sure don't seem to be wasting any time.
JV: They didn't even make it to the ring for the match to start.
[Jesse Aires rolls off the platform.
Desperado jumps off the platform.
Jesse Aires misses with a kick.
Jesse Aires nails him with a bodyslam.
Jesse Aires executes a camel clutch.
Desperado manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.]
VM: The two men are brawling in the aisleway right now.
JV: You get the feeling this is going to be a good match?
[Jesse Aires nails him with a hiptoss.
Jesse Aires executes a fistdrop.
Jesse Aires nails him with an elbowsmash.
Jesse Aires flips his hair back and stares at his opponent.]
JV: He should really get a haircut.
[Jesse Aires executes a hiptoss.
Jesse Aires executes a fistdrop.
Jesse Aires executes a piledriver.]
VM: Aires is all over Desperado and the two men have made their way to
the main concourse.
[Jesse Aires throws Desperado into the mall fountain.
Jesse Aires enters the mall fountain.
Jesse Aires misses with a clothesline.
Jesse Aires hits Desperado with an elbow.]
VM: Both men in the 2 foot deep mall fountain.
[Jesse Aires executes a thrust kick to the head.
Jesse Aires goes for the Badlands, but Desperado counters it with
an armdrag takedown.
Desperado holds Jesse Aires underwater.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, three, four.]
VM: And Desperado is trying to drown Aires!
JV: No he's not. He was just showing Jesse all the change at the bottom
of the fountain.
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires out of the mall fountain.
Desperado follows him out.
Jesse Aires executes a forearm smash.
Jesse Aires catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Matt Compton counts: One, kickout.]
VM: Nice suplex but it only gets a one count.
[Jesse Aires nails him with a kick to the midsection.
Jesse Aires whips Desperado into an ATM, but Desperado reverses it.
Desperado charges into the ATM, but Jesse Aires lifts his leg.]
VM: And both men fighting at the ATM.
JV: Well they want to get some money so they can purchase SWF
Merchandise. Like the Johnny "The Muscle" Ventures shirt, available for
only $19.95.
VM: You have your own SWF T-shirt?
JV: Yup.
VM: I'm hurt, I don't have my own T-shirt.
JV: That's because no one likes you.
[Jesse Aires takes him down with a gutwrench suplex.
Jesse Aires takes him down with a snap mare.
Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, kickout.]
VM: And Jesse's onslaught continues.
[Jesse Aires nails him with an elbowdrop.
Jesse Aires whips Desperado into the ATM.
The ATM starts spitting out money.]
JV: Excuse me.... I'll be right back.
VM: Sit down! You're not going to steal that money from the ATM.
JV: It's not stealing. It's giving away the money.
[Sean O'Brien starts putting the money in his pockets.
Jesse Aires hits Desperado with a backdrop.
Jesse Aires flips his hair back and stares at his opponent.
Jesse Aires whips Desperado into a Dairy Queen.]
VM: And into the Dairy Queen they go.
[Desperado goes for a short lariat, but Jesse Aires counters it with
a duck-down move.
Jesse Aires executes a back suplex.
Jesse Aires orders a soft serve cone.
Jesse Aires shoves the soft serve cone down Desperado's throat.]
JV: Isn't that nice. Apparently there aren't any hard feelings after
all. Jesse just bought Desperado an ice cream cone.
[Jesse Aires throws Desperado back out onto the main concourse.
Jesse Aires takes him down with a bodyslam.
Desperado is busted wide open.]
VM: And that bodyslam onto the linoleum floor cuts Desperado open.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado into Champs Sports
Jesse Aires takes him down with a bodyslam.
Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, kickout.]
VM: And Aires tried to get the pin in Champs Sports, but was
unsuccessful.
JV: Hey McMihn, did you see that football jersey in the background.
VM: No, why?
JV: It was a Raiders Jersey. #88 and the name said Johanson.
VM: Ah, that would be the jersey of former HOWF star Raider.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado into the ski equipment.
Desperado takes him down with a DDT.
Jesse Aires is busted wide open.]
VM: And despite the fact that there is carpeting in this store, that DDT
still busted open Aires.
[Desperado grabs a ski pole.
Desperado hits him the ski pole.]
JV: All right! Now it's really getting hardcore!
[Desperado takes him down with a chop.
Desperado hits him with the ski pole.
Desperado is going for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, kickout.]
VM: Despite a couple hits with the ski pole, Desperado only got a two
count.
[Desperado whips Jesse Aires onto the main concourse
Desperado throws Jesse Aires over a bench.
Desperado goes for a power bomb, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind and distracts Jesse Aires.]
VM: And the two men are back on the main concourse, much to the relief
of the Champs Sports employees.
JV: Yeah but now all the other stores are in danger.
[Desperado whips Jesse Aires into a B. Dalton Books.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires onto a pile of books.]
VM: Right you were Johnny. Now the two men are tearing apart this
bookstore.
[Desperado executes a Vader attack.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado whips Jesse Aires into the Cliff Notes Rack.]
VM: Desperado taking advantage of his managers distraction and throws
Aires right into that rack filled with the blinding yellow and black
Cliff Notes.
JV: Good ol' Cliff Notes. Couldn't have passed any of my english
classes if it wasn't for those things.
[Desperado takes him down with a vertical suplex.
Desperado grabs an unabridged dictionary.
Desperado hits him with the unabridged dictionary.]
VM: And Desperado just whacked Aires up side the head with that huge
dictionary.
JV: That's gotta be a 35 pounds dictionary or so. That thing is bigger
than most telephone books. And it's got a hard cover.
[Desperado takes a swing at Jesse Aires with the unabridged dictionary, but
he gets out of the way.
Jesse Aires snatches the unabridged dictionary from him.
Jesse Aires hits him with the unabridged dictionary.
Jesse Aires flips his hair back and stares at his opponent.
Jesse Aires hits him with the unabridged dictionary.]
JV: So I guess words really can hurt someone.
VM: You're jokes are really bad Johnny.
[Jesse Aires throws Desperado out onto the main concourse.
Jesse Aires throws Desperado through the doors of Planet Hollywood.
Jesse Aires takes him down with a gutwrench suplex.]
VM: And into the wonderful establishment brought to us by Bruce Willis
and Demi Moore.
JV: You know, that gives me an idea. How about Square Circle Cafe?
We'll decorate all the walls with wrestling paraphernalia, serve
outrageously priced food and $30.00 t-shirts with the name of the city
on them!
VM: Please, aren't there enough of those stupid theme cafes?
[Jesse Aires grabs an overpriced cheeseburger from a guy wearing a UTenn
sweatshirt and Slugs hat.
Jesse Aires shoves the cheeseburger down Desperado's throat.
The guy in the UTenn sweatshirt and Slugs hat starts complaining to
management.]
JV: That poor college student will never know what that $12 cheeseburger
tasted like.
[Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Jesse Aires goes for a fistdrop, but Desperado counters it with a roll
away.]
VM: Aires took too much time with that fistdrop and Desperado was able
to get out of the way.
JV: Hey who's that coming towards them?
[Desperado nails him with a spinebuster slam.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, Bruce Willis pulls Desperado up.]
VM: The former star of Moonlighting is interfering in the match!
[Bruce Willis yells "Get out of my restaurant!!!"
Desperado and Jesse aires look at each other.
Desperado hits Bruce Willis with a fist to the midsection.
Desperado yells "That's for Die Hard 3!"
Jesse Aires hits Bruce Willis with a roundhouse right.
Jesse Aires yells "And that's for Hudson Hawk!"]
VM: And the two wrestlers don't seem to be very fond of Bruce Willis's
work.
JV: I guess they haven't seen 5th Element yet, otherwise they'd still be
beating on him.
[Desperado flings Jesse Aires over a row of tables.
They're brawling out the doors and onto the main concourse.
Desperado takes him down with a clothesline.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires into Record Town.
Desperado grabs a Right Said Fred CD.]
VM: And now the two men have made their way into Record Town!
JV: Desperado has some rather questionable music preferences.
[Desperado hits him with the Right Said Fred CD.
The Right Said Fred CD breaks in half.]
JV: I take that back. Desperado was doing all of us a favor. I hope
Desperado makes his way down to the New Kids On The Block section.
[Desperado executes a faceslam.
Desperado knocks Jesse Aires into the wall of cassette tapes.
A store clerk comes running over.]
Store Clerk: Can I help you guys?
Desperado: I'm looking for Mojo Nixon.
Store Clerk: He don't work here.
Desperado: If you don't got Mojo Nixon then your store could use some
fixin'."
(ooc: bonus points to all of you who understand that reference)
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires into a listening station.
Desperado flings Jesse Aires over a couple of CD racks.
Desperado grabs a Kiss CD.]
JV: He better not destroy that Kiss CD!!
VM: It's only a CD.
JV: But Kiss is my favorite group. Hell, I even used one of their songs
as my intro music.
[Desperado hands the CD to the store clerk and says "Hold on to this.
I'll be back later to pick it up."
Desperado whips Jesse Aires into the Country music section.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires out onto the main concourse.]
VM: And back out to the concourse they go.
JV: And it looks like they're headed to one of my favorite restaurants.
[Desperado nails him with a vertical suplex.
Desperado enters Hooters.
Jesse Aires follows him in.]
VM: That would be your favorite restaurant.
[Desperado takes him down with a slap.
Desperado grabs some Buffalo Wings.
Desperado throws the Buffalo Wings at him.]
JV: These guys really seem to like using food as a weapon.
[Desperado executes the Desperate Measures and goes for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And that choke-brainbuster of Desperado's scores the first pinfall.
JV: All Jesse's gotta do is stand up before Compton counts to 10.
[Matt Compton counts: one, two, three,
Desperado starts flirting with a Hooters Waitress]
VM: And Aires is struggling to get to his feet. Last time these two men met,
Aires received a severe concussion after being hit with the Desperate
Measures 12 times!
[four, five, six, Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.]
VM: Aires is back on his feet.
JV: And Desperado isn't happy. Now he has to stop flirting with the
waitress.
[Desperado whips Jesse Aires out onto the main concourse.
Jesse Aires runs into Brookstone.
Desperado runs after him.
Jesse Aires hits Desperado with a backdrop.]
VM: Interesting strategy there by Aires.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado into the massaging chair, but Desperado
reverses it.
Jesse Aires hits Desperado with a shoulderblock.
Jesse Aires executes a spinning mule kick.
Jesse Aires goes for a thrust kick to the head, but Desperado counters it with
a duck-down move.]
VM: And now Jesse Aires is coming back.
[Desperado goes for a faceslam, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Desperado goes for a side suplex, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Jesse Aires nails him with a hiptoss.
Jesse Aires flips his hair back and stares at his opponent.]
JV: Maybe if Aires is lucky, they'll make their way to Super Cuts.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado into the foosball table.
Desperado charges Jesse Aires.
Jesse Aires hits Desperado with a backdrop.
Desperado breaks through the wall and lands in Circuit City.]
VM: DID YOU SEE THAT!?! Desperado got backdropped right through the
wall!!!!
JV: Very poor construction.
[Jesse Aires goes through the hole in the wall.
Jesse Aires climbs on top of the counter.
Jesse Aires jumps onto him with a jumping elbow thrust from the counter.]
VM: And Aires making good use of his surroundings.
[Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado grabs a blender.
Desperado hits him with the blender.]
JV: Lucky for Aires that blender wasn't plugged in.
[Desperado goes for a faceslam, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Jesse Aires throws Desperado over a row of dishwashers.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind and distracts Jesse Aires.
Desperado grabs a microwave.
Desperado hits him with the microwave.]
VM: Desperado going for the bigger kitchen appliances now.
[Desperado catches him in a power bomb.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.]
VM: Aires showing that he can still take a licking and keep on ticking.
[Desperado hits him with the microwave.
Desperado goes for a side suplex, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
They're brawling back onto the main concourse.]
VM: And they're out of Circuit City and it looks like they're headed for
Music Videos To Go.
JV: One of those cheesy places where you can lipsync to a hit song and
make a crappy video of it.
[Jesse Aires nails him with an elbowsmash.
Jesse Aires goes for the Badlands, but Desperado counters it with
a backward kick.
Desperado whips Jesse Aires through the doors.
The two men knock each other into the recording booth where a guy is
lipsyncing to the Bee Gee's "Stayin' Alive".]
JV: Someone needs to tell that guy that disco is dead.
[Desperado goes for a vertical suplex, but Jesse Aires reverses it.
Jesse Aires rips the speaker off the wall.]
JV: Thank god. Now we don't have to listen to that horrible music.
[Jesse Aires takes a swing at Desperado with the speaker, but
he gets out of the way.
Desperado snatches the speaker from him.
Desperado hits him with the speaker.]
VM: Unfortunately for Aires, Desperado is the one that was able to
capitalize with the speaker. Now the two men have made their way back
out to the main concourse.
[Jesse Aires goes for a vertical suplex, but Desperado reverses it.
Desperado takes him down with a DDT.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires through the window of Alamo Flags.]
VM: And now they're in the flag shop.
JV: I really hate to see the bill for all the damage done in this match.
[Desperado flings Jesse Aires over a row of flags.
Desperado grabs a steel flagpole.
Desperado hits him with the steel flagpole.]
JV: Kinda reminiscent of the U.S. Capitol Death match a couple weeks ago
between Jagged Edge and Sandman.
[Desperado nails him with a short lariat.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Desperado scores another pinfall.
[Matt Compton counts: one, two, three, Jesse Aires gets back to his
feet.]
JV: Didn't take Aires long to get back to his feet that time.
[Desperado hits him with the steel flagpole.
Desperado goes for a power bomb, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Jesse Aires flings Desperado into a row of flags.
Desperado grabs a Texas State flag.]
VM: Desperado finds a flag of his home state. I wonder what he's going
to do with it.
[Desperado chokes him with the Texas State flag.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, three.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado whips Jesse Aires into the flagpoles.]
VM: That has to hurt.
JV: Jesse is lucky that none of those flag poles were sticking out.
Otherwise he could've been impaled.
[Desperado grabs a shelf off the wall.
Desperado hits him with the shelf.]
VM: That swing was hard enough to knock Aires out of the store.
[Desperado executes a short lariat.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
VM: And another near pin there.
JV: They're right in front of one of my favorite stores now.
VM: They're in front of Spencer's Gifts, which is one of the more
mainstream Adult stores.
[Desperado flings Jesse Aires into Spencer's Gifts.
Desperado grabs a vibrator
Desperado hits him with the vibrator.]
JV: I think that's a first for the wrestling world.
[Desperado executes the Desperate Measures on the linoleum floor
and goes for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And again with that choke brainbuster.
[Matt Compton counts: one, two, three,]
VM: Aires is barely moving.
[four, five, six, seven,]
VM: Aires is beginning to struggle to get to his feet. Although I think
he should really stay down so he doesn't risk injury again.
[eight, nine, Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.
Desperado throws his arms up in despair.]
VM: He did it! Aires got back up on his feet! I don't believe it!
JV: And neither does Desperado.
VM: Aires staggers out of Spencer's.
[Jesse Aires staggers into Starlog.
Desperado following him in.
Desperado goes for a thrust kick to the head, but Jesse Aires counters it with
a duck-down move.]
VM: And now the two men are fighting in the Sci-fi collectibles shop.
[Jesse Aires takes him down with a short clothesline.
Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton counts: One, two, Sean O'Brien distracts Matt Compton by
showing him the lifesize Yoda.]
JV: O'Brien has done his homework. He knew that Compton is a huge Star
Wars fan.
[Jesse Aires nails him with a vertical suplex.
Matt Compton takes the lifesize Yoda up to the counter.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Matt Compton shells out $200 for the lifesize yoda.
Desperado grabs a scale model of the Starship Enterprise.
Desperado hits him with the scale model of the Starship Enterprise.]
JV: Trekkies everywhere are fainting.
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires out onto the main concourse.
Desperado goes for a powerslam, but Jesse Aires counters it with a lariat.
Desperado falls back into Glamour Shots.]
JV: Now they're in the photo studio where middle aged women go and put
on lot's of makeup to try to look sexy.
[Jesse Aires goes for a bodyslam, but Desperado blocks it.
Desperado grabs a hand mirror
Desperado hits him with the hand mirror.
Desperado sets up Jesse Aires on the makeup table.
Desperado executes a DDT through the table.
The table is broken in half.]
VM: Desperado drove Aires right through that make-up table.
JV: Let's see, that's one blender, one microwave, one scale model of
the Starship Enterprise, one speaker, one window, one texas state flag,
one hand mirror, one make up table....
VM: What are you doing?
JV: making a list of everything they've destroyed so far.
[Desperado nails him with a fist to the midsection.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado hits him with the handmirror.
Desperado is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: and another successful pin for Desperado.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three,
four, Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.]
VM: And somehow Aires gets back to his feet.
JV: He's gotta be taking some drugs.
[Jesse Aires staggers out of Glamour Shots.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires onto the escalator.
They're brawling up the escalator.
Desperado goes for a bodyslam, but Jesse Aires counters it with a small
package.]
JV: A small package on a moving escalator?
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
VM: Desperado barely kicks out in time.
[Both men get off the escalator at the top.
Desperado knocks Jesse Aires into the hardware department of Sears.]
JV: Everyone, be on the lookout for Bob Vila.
[Desperado grabs a hammer.
Desperado hits him with the hammer.
Desperado yells "You are all pitiful excuses for human beings!" at the
Sears customers.]
JV: Way to draw attention to yourself idiot.
VM: I think everyone had already noticed the two men fighting being
followed by two men who are carrying a laptop computer and a lifesize
Yoda.
[Desperado hits him with the hammer.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires out of Sears.
Desperado goes for a vertical suplex, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Jesse Aires throws Desperado onto the up escalator.]
VM: And they're headed for the 3rd floor.
[Jesse Aires hits him with a bulldog headlock.
Both men go tumbling down the escalator.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda and Sean O'Brien dive out of the
way.
Jesse Aires and Desperado tumble into a group of 10 nuns, knocking down
8 of them.]
JV: Ooh, a 7-10 split. That's going to be a tough spare.
[Desperado hits him with the a nun.]
JV: That'll get ya a free trip to hell.
[Jesse Aires falls onto the up escalator.
Desperado gets on the up escalator.
Both men get off at the top.]
VM: And they have now made it to the 3rd floor.
JV: And most of the stores on the 2nd level remain unscathed.
[Desperado flings Jesse Aires through the Electronic Boutique window.
Desperado grabs a Sega Saturn.
Desperado hits him with the Sega Saturn.
Desperado is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And yet another pinfall. But all these pinfalls don't do any good
if Aires doesn't stay down for the 10 count.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three, four,
Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.]
VM: Unbelievable. Despite all the punishment Aires has taken, he has
again made it back to his feet.
[Desperado executes a powerslam.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
JV: But Desperado didn't let that bother him. He just caught Aires in a
powerslam as soon as he stood up.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three, four,
VM: I think this might be it.
[five, six, seven, eight, Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.]
JV: No way!
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires out of Electronic Boutique and into Burger
King.]
VM: Desperado getting very frustrated now.
Desperado goes for a faceslam, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind and distracts Jesse Aires.
Jesse Aires catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Aires finally scores a pinfall.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, Desperado gets
back to his feet.]
VM: And Desperado got back to his feet very quickly.
[Jesse Aires hits him with a clothesline
Jesse Aires goes for an elbowdrop, but Desperado counters it with a roll away.
Desperado is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Aires just didn't have the strength to break out of that pin.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, Jesse Aires gets back to
his feet.]
JV: But he was able to get back to his feet after a one count?
[Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado grabs a napkin holder.
Desperado takes a swing at Jesse Aires with the napkin holder, but he gets
out of the way.
Jesse Aires snatches the napkin holder from him.
Jesse Aires hits him with the napkin holder.
Jesse Aires throws him out of Burger King and into the elevator doors.]
JV: It's a shame those elevator doors weren't open.
[Desperado nails him with a DDT.
The elevator doors open up.
Desperado nails him with a slap.
Jesse Aires falls into the elevator.
Desperado enters the elevator and pushes the button for the first
floor.]
VM: And they decide to take the quick way back down.
JV: Actually the quick way would be if they threw each other over the
guardrail and fell to the first floor.
[The elevator doors open up on the first floor.
Desperado nails him with a facebite.
Desperado nails him with a short lariat.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
VM: Another near pinfall.
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires into the Nordic Track store.
Desperado knocks Jesse Aires into the Nordic Track.
Desperado takes him down with a clothesline.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires over the Nordic Health Rider.
Desperado executes a tilt-a-whirl suplex.
Desperado yells "These are all pitiful excuses for exercise machines!"]
JV: I guess Desperado can forget about doing endorsements for Nordic
Track.
[Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Jesse Aires staggers over to The Safety Zone.]
VM: And Aires is heading over to the store for James Bond wannabe's.
[Desperado goes for a chokehold, but Jesse Aires blocks it.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado grabs the pepper spray.
Desperado sprays him with the pepper spray.]
VM: Desperado just blinded Aires with that pepper spray!
[Jesse Aires grabs a tazer.
Jesse Aires hits him with the tazer.
Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Aires fights back and gets a pin after hitting Desperado with
the tazer.
JV: Shocking!
VM: Your jokes really are bad.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three, Desperado
gets back to his feet.]
VM: And Desperado gets back to his feet somehow.
JV: His body is still twitching involuntarily every now and then
though.
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires out of the store.
Desperado takes him down with a Vader attack.
Desperado nails him with a chop.
Jesse Aires crawls into Radio Shack.]
VM: And now into Radio Shack. These guys seem to want to take this match
to every store.
[Desperado grabs a low quality stereo.
Desperado hits him with the low quality stereo.
Desperado executes a stomachbreaker.]
JV: I'm surprised that stereo didn't break into a hundred pieces.
VM: Well I'm sure that stereo won't work all that well now.
JV: Like anything from Radio Shack ever does.
[Desperado yells "These are all pitiful excuses for electronics!"]
JV: I think Desperado can rule out any endorsements.
[Desperado is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.
Desperado throws Jesse Aires out of Radio Shack and into Suncoast
Motion Picture company.]
VM: And now Desperado decides to try his luck in a different store.
[Desperado takes him down with a facerake.
Desperado knocks Jesse Aires into a Jerry MacGuire display.]
JV: I still haven't seen that movie.
[Desperado throws Jesse Aires over the music video section.
Desperado executes the Desperate Measures on the carpeted floor
and goes for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And a powerful choke brainbuster there and Aires is out of it.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three,]
JV: It's over. Aires isn't even moving.
[four, five, six, seven,]
VM: Well he's started moving, but I still have to agree with you.
[eight, nine, Jesse Aires gets back to his feet.]
JV: Aires is like the villain in those horror films. Just when you
think he's gone, he comes back to life somehow.
[Desperado hits him with a copy of Pulp Fiction.
Desperado executes a bodyslam.
Desperado executes the Desperate Measures on the concrete floor
and goes for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: Ok that should be it.
JV: He barely made it up before so he shouldn't be able to make this.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three, four, Jesse
Aires gets back to his feet.]
JV & VM: WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!
JV: I want that man tested for drugs immediately after the match.
[Desperado throws him into FAO Schwarz.
Sean O'Brien comes from behind, but Jesse Aires nails Sean O'Brien.
Desperado grabs an overpriced game of Monopoly.
Desperado hits him with the overpriced game of Monopoly.]
JV: I never understood how FAO Schwarz can stay in business with those
outrageous prices.
VM: It's a status thing. People shop there just to prove that they can
afford to shop there.
[Desperado nails him with a low blow.
Desperado takes him down with a vertical suplex.
Desperado whips Jesse Aires into a rocking horse.
Desperado hits him with the overpriced game of monopoly.
Desperado knocks Jesse Aires into a stack of other overpriced games.
Desperado takes a swing at Jesse Aires with the overpriced game of
Monopoly, but he gets out of the way.
Jesse Aires snatches the overpriced game of Monopoly from him.
Jesse Aires hits him with the overpriced game of Monopoly.
JV: You know I think a game of Monopoly would've been shorter than this
match.
[Jesse Aires throws Desperado out of FAO Schwarz and into Nordstrom.
Jesse Aires goes for a snap suplex, but Desperado counters it with
a vertical suplex.
Jesse Aires re-reverses it.]
VM: And they go from the overpriced toy store to the overpriced clothing
store.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado into the rack of clothes.
Jesse Aires throws Desperado over the rack of clothes.
Jesse Aires grabs a hanger.
Jesse Aires hits him with the hanger.
Desperado takes him down with a thrust kick to the head.]
VM: And that thrust kick knocks Aires right on out of Nordstrom's.
[Sean O'Brien comes from behind and distracts Jesse Aires.
Desperado nails him with a punch.]
VM: And that punch causes Aires to fall into Foot Locker.
[Desperado grabs a pair of spiked cleats.
Desperado hits him with the pair of spiked cleats.]
JV: I give Desperado credit for choosing a good shoe to use as a weapon.
[Jesse Aires goes for an atomic drop, but Desperado counters it with
a bulldog headlock.
In turn, Jesse Aires counters it with a throw-off.]
VM: And Aires throws Desperado off and right into Arby's.
[Desperado grabs an order of fries.
Desperado hits him with the order of fries.
Desperado yells "You all serve really good food!"]
JV: What? Did I hear that right? I think Desperado is trying to land an
advertising deal with Arby's.
[Desperado goes for the Desperate Measures, but Jesse Aires counters it with
a double leg-hook.
Jesse Aires grabs a tray.
Jesse Aires hits him with the tray.]
JV: Definitely a more effective weapon than the fries.
[Jesse Aires is going for the pin.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Aires has scored another pin. Could this be the beginning of a
comeback?
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three, four, five,
Desperado gets back to his feet.]
VM: Not that time.
[Jesse Aires whips Desperado out of Arby's and into Tekno Comix.
Jesse Aires catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: One, two, Sean O'Brien distracts
Matt Compton by showing him the latest issue of Superman.]
JV: We really need to ditch this Compton guy.
[Jesse Aires executes an armbar submission.
There is no referee there to ask Desperado.
Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda is back on the job.
Desperado submits after 15 seconds.]
VM: Desperado seems to be really hurt.
JV: Yeah that Belly-to-belly really knocked the wind out of him. Luckily
O'Brien was able to distract Matt. Which in turned hurt Desperado, cuz
he was submitting instantly, but since Matt wasn't around he didn't hear
the submission and didn't make Aires break the hold.
[Matt Compton with the lifesize Yoda counts: one, two, three,]
VM: Desperado is just lying there in pain. It looks like he's not even
trying to get up.
[four, five, six, seven, eight,]
JV: Get up Desperado!
[nine, ten.]
VM: THAT'S IT! Jesse Aires manages to come from behind to pull off a
major victory.
JV: Unbelievable.
VM: Let's go back to the ring for the official announcement.
RR: The winner is Jesse Aires, in a time of 33:01.
VM: Wow so both of the matches between Desperado and Aires have gone
over 30 minutes.
JV: They are extremely evenly matched guys. I think any matches of
theirs will go down in the books as one of the best matches ever.
-------------------
(back to the guys in the studio)
Chip: "Paralyzer" Patrick Bordeau eventually won the Toughman Title tournament.
Fool: Well, since the finals was the very next match, and Aires had no time to rest, I guess
that makes sense.
Chip: Jesse Aires has since retired, and is now running the "Power Station" wrestling school.
Desperado went on to win the American Title, but left the SWF shortly after losing the belt
to Pagan.
(We see the Fool, opening up an Arby's bag.)
Chip: When did you get that?
Fool: During the match. I saw Arby's, so I ran out for some Beef 'n Cheddars. Mmmmmm....
Beef 'n Cheddars...
Chip: Did you get me one?
Fool (laughing): Yeah, right.
Chip: Fans, when we return, you'll see one of the most brutal attacks in SWF history.
Fool: Whoo-hoo!
-------------------
("Wax Ecstatic" by Sponge plays as we see footage of Mr. Shhh and Rock 'n Roll Animal fighting.)
Voice: They were bitter enemies.
Chip: It's Mr. Shhh and his bodyguards! They're attacking Animal!
(Footage of Mr. Shhh and Animal shaking hands at Ides of March.)
Voice: They were partners.
JV: Mr. Shhh has joined the Gangstas! I don't believe it!
Voice: When they fight for the SWF World Title, it's going to be...a blast.
(The image bursts into a cloud of confetti, then the Birthday Blast logo.)
Voice: SWF Birthday Blast. Tomorrow night on pay-per-view.
-------------------
(Return to Chip and the Fool in the studio, who are standing in front of a giant picture
of the Unholy Alliance.)
Chip: The Unholy Alliance made SWF history on June 10th, 1997, when Zodiac and War Machine
won the SWF Tag Team titles.
Fool: But they had internal problems when a feud began between their new member, Moon Dog Gator,
and Damien Grundy, the protege of founding TUA member Bones Douglas.
Chip: Moon Dog won the first meeting with Grundy, but a rematch was set for SWF Slaughterhouse.
It was a steel chain death match, and the consequences were brutal.
----------------------------------------
Moon Dog Gator vs. Damien Grundy (Chain Death Match-Falls Count Anywhere)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Slaughterhouse.
Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
June 21, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
VM: Next up we have a match between two of the more bizarre individuals.
let's go to Howard Stern for the intros.
HS: All right. Listen up. This next match is a falls count anywhere
Chain Death Match. Introducing first, being led to the ring by his
manager Bones Douglas, from San Antonio, Texas, weighing in at 390
pounds, here is Damien Grundy!!
["Lock up the Wolves" by Dio blares as Damien and Bones walk down to the
ring. Bones is carrying a guitar case with him. The crowd gives a
mixed reaction.]
HS: His opponent, from Jackson, Mississippi, weighing in at 370 pounds,
here is Moon Dog Gator!!
["Bring the Noise" by Anthrax & Public Enemy blares as Moon Dog runs
down to the ring. The crowd gives him a mixed reaction.]
VM: This ought to be a good match between 2 similar people.
JV: yeah, they're both retards.
VM: Johnny!
JV: oh yeah, they're both hicks too.
[They lock up.
Damien Grundy chokes him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy places Moon Dog Gator on the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, in the ropes...
Damien Grundy howls like a wolf.]
VM: Damien almost got the first pin but was too close to the ropes.
JV: We also got a howler and a barker.
VM: Will you stop?
[Damien Grundy hits him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy goes for a moonsault, but Moon Dog Gator counters it with
a roll away.
Moon Dog Gator goes for a Big Leg Drop, but Damien Grundy counters it with
a roll away.]
JV: Rolling down the River.
[Moon Dog Gator executes a roundhouse right.
Damien Grundy executes a clawhold.
Moon Dog Gator manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 7 seconds.
Moon Dog Gator executes an elbowsmash.
Moon Dog Gator goes for the D-Dog-T, but Damien Grundy counters it with
a Hotshot.]
VM: Damien managed to counter that turnbuckle DDT finisher of Moon
Dog's.
[Damien Grundy executes a double underhook piledriver.
Damien Grundy whips Moon Dog Gator into the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy charges into the corner.
Damien Grundy whips him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy takes him down with a thrust kick to the head.
Damien Grundy whips Moon Dog Gator into the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy runs shoulder-first into the corner, but Moon Dog Gator
moves out of the way.
Moon Dog Gator goes for a headbutt, but Damien Grundy blocks it.
Damien Grundy places Moon Dog Gator on the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.]
VM: Despite Damien's Dominance in this match, He can't keep the Dog down
for a three count.
[Damien Grundy takes him down with a moonsault.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Damien Grundy howls like a wolf.
Damien Grundy goes for a chinlock deathlock submission, but Moon Dog Gator
blocks it.
Moon Dog Gator executes an elbowsmash.
Moon Dog Gator goes for the D-Dog-T, but Damien Grundy counters it with
a Hotshot.]
VM: Again, Damien counters Moon Dog's finisher.
[Moon Dog Gator executes a double chickenwing submission.
Damien Grundy reaches the ropes after being trapped for 18 seconds.]
JV: I'm shocked! There was some scientific wrestling there!
[Moon Dog Gator chokes him with the Chain.
Moon Dog Gator goes for a chokehold, but Damien Grundy blocks it.
Damien Grundy executes a full nelson.
Moon Dog Gator manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Moon Dog Gator executes a bearhug.
Damien Grundy reaches the ropes after being trapped for 7 seconds.
Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a bodyslam.
Moon Dog Gator nails him with a kneeling headbutt.
Moon Dog Gator is going for the pin.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, kickout.
Moon Dog Gator scratches his head furiously as he barks.]
JV: I seriously think these two may have been separated at birth.
[Moon Dog Gator goes for a Big Leg Drop, but Damien Grundy counters it with
a roll away.
Damien Grundy executes a facebite.
Damien Grundy hits him with the Chain.]
JV: I also think these two should be chained to a tree at all times.
[Damien Grundy takes him down with a moonsault.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, kickout.
Damien Grundy goes for a full nelson, but Moon Dog Gator counters it with
a backward kick.
Damien Grundy whips Moon Dog Gator into the turnbuckle.
Moon Dog Gator comes back, but is met with a kick to the midsection.
Damien Grundy goes for a clawhold, but Moon Dog Gator blocks it.
Moon Dog Gator whips Damien Grundy into the turnbuckle.
Moon Dog Gator charges in with an avalanche, but Damien Grundy lifts his
leg.]
JV: Hey! No urinating in public!!!
VM: Your jokes really are bad.
[Damien Grundy goes for a jack-knife power bomb, but Moon Dog Gator
counters it with a backdrop.
Moon Dog Gator executes a thrust kick to the head.
Moon Dog Gator whips him with the Chain.
Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a chinlock deathlock submission.
Damien Grundy manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5
seconds.]
VM: Apparently the Unholy Alliance has started teaching Moon Dog some
submission moves.
[Damien Grundy howls like a wolf.
Damien Grundy nails him with a facebite.
Damien Grundy is going for the pin.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Damien Grundy whips him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy nails him with a jack-knife power bomb.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, in the ropes...]
VM: And again too close to the ropes.
[Damien Grundy hits him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy nails him with a camel clutch.
Moon Dog Gator reaches the ropes after being trapped for 11 seconds.
Moon Dog Gator whips Damien Grundy into the turnbuckle.
Moon Dog Gator charges in with an avalanche, but Damien Grundy lifts his
leg.]
JV: What did I say about that?! I think I need to hit him on the nose
with a rolled up newspaper.
[Damien Grundy takes him down with a thrust kick to the head.
Damien Grundy executes a clawhold.
Moon Dog Gator reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Damien Grundy goes for an armlock leglock submission, but Moon Dog Gator
blocks it.
Moon Dog Gator goes for a sleeperhold, but Damien Grundy blocks it.
Damien Grundy goes for a thrust kick to the head, but Moon Dog Gator
counters it with a duck-down move.
Moon Dog Gator executes a powerslam.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, kickout.]
VM: The huge powerslam only nets a 2 count?
JV: nets? you've been reading that thesaurus again?
[Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a headbutt.
Moon Dog Gator executes the Doctor Bomb.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Moon Dog Gator whips Damien Grundy into the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy comes back and rocks Moon Dog Gator with a kick to the midsection.
Damien Grundy goes for a double underhook piledriver, but Moon Dog Gator
counters it with a backdrop.
In turn, Damien Grundy counters it with a sunset flip.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.]
VM: Damien caught Moon Dog off guard with that counter to his counter
and almost got a pin.
[Damien Grundy goes for a short lariat, but Moon Dog Gator counters it with
a duck-down move.
Moon Dog Gator whips him with the Chain.
Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a bearhug.
Damien Grundy manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 24
seconds.]
JV: Wow Moon Doggie really had that Bearhug locked on tight for a long
time.
[Damien Grundy attempts to place Moon Dog Gator on the turnbuckle, but
Moon Dog Gator blocks it.
Damien Grundy places Moon Dog Gator on the turnbuckle.
Damien Grundy catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
VM: Damien getting a little frustrated that he can't keep Moon Dog down.
[Damien Grundy hits him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but Moon Dog Gator blocks it.
Moon Dog Gator nails him with a facebite.
Moon Dog Gator nails him with a bodyslam.
Moon Dog Gator throws Damien Grundy out of the ring.
Moon Dog Gator goes through the ropes.
Moon Dog Gator goes for the D-Dog-T, but Damien Grundy counters it with
a backdrop.]
VM: This time Damien counters the D-Dog-T with a backdrop.
JV: You know, I bet if Damien were to hit his finisher, he'd be able to
pin Moon Dog.
[Damien Grundy chokes him with the Chain.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Damien Grundy throws Moon Dog Gator over the guardrail.
A UTenn Student dives out of the way.]
JV: There's that damn Hick College Student again.
VM: Yeah but he got rid of the TUA shirt he usually wears. What does
this shirt say....."Get Well Soon Yllana"
JV: Awwww! Isn't that sweet? That kid's a friggin loser. I bet he's
the type who get's into e-wrestling and thinks he's all mean and bad.
[Damien Grundy catches him in a power bomb.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, shoulder up.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.
Moon Dog Gator is busted wide open.
Damien Grundy chokes him with the Chain.
Damien Grundy is rips the shirt off of the UTenn student.]
JV: I'm Blind!!!
VM: Will you stop!
JV: Last thing I wanted to see was that college student's flabby
stomach.
[Damien Grundy shoves the shirt down Moon Dog Gator's throat.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.
Moon Dog Gator chokes him with the Chain.
Moon Dog Gator nails him with a vertical suplex.
They're brawling up the aisle.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Damien Grundy takes him down with a Frankensteiner.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Damien finally gets a three count.
JV: Yeah But I think Moon Dog will get back up before the ten count.
[Sean Ceigersmidt counts: one, two, three, Moon Dog Gator gets back to
his feet.]
VM: And right you were Johnny.
[Damien Grundy knocks Moon Dog Gator into the ringsteps.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a short lariat.
Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Moon Dog Gator scratches his head furiously as he barks.]
JV: I really would've thought that Zodiac and War machine would've given
him a flea dip before letting him into their training room.
[Moon Dog Gator picks up the ringsteps.
Moon Dog Gator hits him with the ringsteps.
Moon Dog Gator whips Damien Grundy into the guardrail.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Moon Dog Gator throws Damien Grundy over the guardrail.]
VM: Moon Dog using every piece of metal to his advantage.
[Moon Dog Gator goes for a cobra clutch, but Damien Grundy counters it with
an armdrag takedown.
Damien Grundy hits him with the Chain.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.
Moon Dog Gator whips Damien Grundy into the guardrail.
They're brawling up the aisle.
Moon Dog Gator enters the ring.
Damien Grundy follows him in.
Moon Dog Gator takes him down with a double chickenwing submission.]
VM: And Moon Dog using some smarts there, by forcing Damien to drop his
guard to enter the ring, and he applies the Double Chickenwing.
JV: I'm still looking for that Single Chickenwing Submission hold.
[Damien Grundy submits after 10 seconds.]
VM: And Apparently Damien couldn't take any more.
[Sean Ceigersmidt counts: one, two, three, four,]
VM: Bones is yelling at Damien to get back up.
[five, six, seven,]
JV: Both wrestlers are just exhausted. Moon Dog is sitting down over in
the corner.
[eight, nine, ten.]
VM: And that is it. In a great battle, Moon Dog emerges victorious.
[Bones Douglas picks up the guitar case and climbs into the ring. As
he walks over to Damien Grundy he kicks Moon Dog Gator's teeth in.]
VM: There was no need for that!
[Bones then picks up Grundy and stands him up. He starts to yell at
Grundy and the surrounding mics pick up what he's saying.]
Bones: Finish him, goddamnit!
[Damien Grundy is exhausted and only replies with a whimper. Bones
then slaps him across the face.]
Bones: Finish the Dog, you stupid piece of shit!
VM: Bones is getting rather abusive towards his wrestler.
[Damien Grundy's face takes on a twisted look and he shoots back.]
Grundy: Grundy's not stupid!
JV: I beg to differ.
Bones: Well, finish him then!
[Damien Grundy turns his attention to Moon Dog Gator who is still
laid out on the mat face down. Grundy drops an elbow on the back
of Moon Dog's head.]
Bones: More!
VM: We need to get security down here!
[Damien Grundy climbs the top turnbuckle and nails Moon Dog with
a flying kneedrop to the middle of the back. He then stands up and
looks at Bones.]
Bones: What are you stopping for?
[Damien Grundy climbs the top turnbuckle and hits Moon Dog in
the spine with a flying headbutt. Grundy gets very dazed in the
process and stumbles back towards Bones.]
Bones: Did I say you were done? No!
[Bones Douglas sets down the guitar case and opens it up. He
removes a sledge hammer from inside and hands it to Damien Grundy.]
VM: Dear Lord NO!!!!
Bones: Now finish him and let's get the hell out of here!
[Damien Grundy lifts the sledge hammer above his head and lets
it crash down on Moon Dog's spine. Grundy falls down as well.]
VM: My god! Moon Dog was just hit in the back with a Sledge hammer!!
He could be paralyzed!!!
Bones: Again!
[Damien Grundy stands back up, lifts the sledge hammer, and again
comes crashing down with it again on Moon Dog's spine.]
VM: Where is security?!?!
Bones: Again!
VM: Johnny, I've never asked this of you before, but will you go down
and put an end to this madness? Please?!
JV: Sorry, this is out of my hands.
[Once more Damien Grundy gets up, and drops the sledge hammer
on Moon Dog who is completely motionless at this point.]
Bones: Good now come over here.
[Bones Douglas motions for Damien Grundy to stand by his side.
Grundy comes over and leans on his manager while Bones pats him
on the back.]
Bones: Good job...now give me that.
[Damien Grundy hands the sledge hammer back to him and continues
to lean his exhausted and massive body upon Bones. Bones Douglas
then steps aside and gives Damien Grundy a shove from behind
causing him to fall flat on his face. He then lifts the sledge hammer
and slams it down on the back of Damien Grundy's head. Blood starts
to gush immediately and soaks the canvas beneath and around
Grundy's head.]
VM: OH MY GOD!!! I think he killed Damien!!!!! Somebody call the
police!!
JV: We're in New York. It'll take them 2 days just to get here.
[Bones Douglas then leans out over the ropes.]
Bones: Give me a mic!
[A ring attendant hands Bones a ringside microphone.]
Bones: Look at the stupid Grundy.
[Bones Douglas nudges the inert carcass with his foot.]
Bones: I wonder if he's dead? Hell, who gives a shit? I ain't
no fucking manager anyway...but like I said before, Moon Dog
would be eliminated, and it sure as hell looks like he's gone.
I guess I never mentioned that the Grundy would be joining
him. But this isn't about me trying to be tough, because almost
anybody could've taken out these two sacks of shit. It's about
a new beginning, well actually an old beginning...
[Bones Douglas smiles and props the sledge hammer up on
one shoulder.]
Bones: I could go on forever, but I'm going to be brief...unlike
certain cock-smokers who wasted half of a goddamn show
on Tuesday. That's right, I'm talking about the star-struck
Compound. Hey Z, do you really think anyone gave a shit
about what you had to say on Tuesday?
JV: Zodiac gave a speech on Tuesday?
Bones: No, they didn't... because nobody cares about the Compound
and all your little buddies. Nobody cares about Pegasus, Phoenix, and
Retribution and whether or not you're in good graces with them.
Nobody even knows who the hell Aries is...and nobody cares.
Hell, if Taurus had come out, it would have been equivalent to
one of the original members of Menudo coming out...
because nobody remembers him and nobody gives a flying
fuck about him or the Compound. Face it, you all just
wasted everybody's time.
[Bones Douglas looks at his wrist as if he were wearing a
watch.]
Bones: Oh damn, look at the time. I've practically fallen
guilty of pulling one of your babbling sessions. And so,
in conclusion...
[Bones suppresses laughter and then gets serious.]
Bones: ...Compound, Underground, War Machine...
bring it on. It's not a deathwish as Phoenix said; it's
called self-reliance. Bones Douglas doesn't need a
goddamn wrestler to train and he sure as hell doesn't
need TUA. It's back to looking out for #1...And I
know I can take anything you guys can dish out and
then some.......
[Bones Douglas gets in close to one of the cameras
up on the ring apron.]
Bones: ...Bones is back...deal with it.
[Bones Douglas tosses the mic to the mat and leaves the
ring with the sledge hammer. He then exits back up the aisle.
Paramedics immediately rush towards the ring. The crowd is silent as
the paramedics attend to Moon Dog and Damien.
VM: This is indeed a sad day in the world of wrestling. We have just
witnessed what is probably the most brutal attack ever televised. I
hope charges are pressed against Bones for his actions. He probably
paralyzed moon Dog and Damien could very well be dead!
JV: Unfortunately Vance, this is wrestling. Wrestlers never press
charges against other wrestlers.
VM: There needs to be some disciplinary action taken. The SWF can not
let this go unpunished. I think it's safe to say that neither Damien or
Moon Dog will be wrestling soon, if indeed they can ever wrestle again.
I am just shocked by what I have just witnessed. I am not sure that I
can continue on and commentate the final match.
JV: Look Vance, I agree with you that what we just witnessed is
exceedingly brutal and graphic, but that is part of our business. Now
we only got one match left.
[Both Moon Dog and Damien have neck braces on them and have been
strapped to the backboards and are being carried sown the aisle.]
VM: Well we will try to update you to their condition as soon as we hear
anything.
-------------------
(Return to the Fool in the studio, alone, munching on a Beef 'n Cheddar.)
Fool: Oh, hi! Chip went to Arby's. I don't know what's taking him so long.
(We see the sound of someone banging on a door and Chip's voice saying, "Let me in, dammit!")
Fool: Wasn't that a great match? Of course, Bones was right. The Underground were a bunch of
losers. Bacon was the only one who was worth a damn, and Equalizer broke him.
(We hear a key turning in a lock.)
Fool: Moon Dog recovered and ended up winning the SWF World Title. Grundy's walking again. I
think I saw him and Desperado workin' the shake machine together down at Arby's.
(Chip Collins bursts in, holding an Arby's bag with a very upset look on his face.)
Fool (to Chip): What was I supposed to do?
Chip: Open the door!
Fool: I couldn't! We would have had dead air!
Chip: Fans, we'll be right back with footage from the Pot of Gold pay-per-view.
----------------------
("Wax Ecstatic" by Sponge plays as we see footage of Doug Bacon power bombing Jagged Edge.)
Voice: He ruled the Supreme Wrestling Federation for six months.
Bacon: Prepare to be fried, fried and Baconized!
(Footage of Doug Bacon hitting the Fried Bacon on Eric Wright.)
Voice: Now, he's back for the biggest show of the year.
VM: Fried Bacon! Fried Bacon!
Voice: When Doug Bacon returns to the SWF, it's going to be...a blast.
(The image bursts into a cloud of confetti, then the Birthday Blast logo.)
Voice: SWF Birthday Blast. Tomorrow night on pay-per-view.
(in a lower voice) Doug Bacon will not actually be wrestling at Birthday Blast.
------------------------------------------------
(As we return, Chip and The Fool are sitting at a table strewn with Arby's wrappers, in front of
a giant picture of Virgo and Mickey Dee.)
Chip: Welcome back to the Best of the SWF.
Fool: You love it. You're a big fan.
Chip: In the month of July, the SWF held tournaments to fill two new titles. There would be an
SWF American Champion, and an SWF International Champion.
Fool: Both tournaments came to a conclusion at the SWF Pot o' Gold pay-per-view in Las Vegas.
Jagged Edge won the American Title in an incredible ladder match.
Chip: But the International Title came down to two very skilled wrestlers. There was the
massive Reaper, from Holland, and the crowd pleasing Virgo, who would later become The
Equalizer. It was Virgo vs. The Reaper, falls count anywhere, and this is the first time this
match has appeared on television.
--------------------------------------------------
Virgo vs. The Reaper (International Title Tournament Finals-Falls Count Anywhere)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Pot o' Gold Pay-per-view.
Caesar's Palace, Las Vegas, NV
July 20, 1997
Announcers: Robert Jones and Captain Canuck)
-----------------------------
RR: This match is for the first ever SWF International Championship!
Introducing first, from Amsterdam, Holland. Weighing in at 457
pounds, being led to the ring by the Ripper. Here is the master of the
Reaper's Piledriver... The Reaper... come on down!!
[the Ripper leads the Reaper to the ring.
He walks slowly with a dark suit and he had knifes on his arms..
and he has the big blade just like the Reaper! The fans boo him and
boo him some more and he enters the ring.]
RJ: There he is, the monster known as the Reaper.
CC: Yes, but the bigger they are, you know the rest. Plus I think this
man may have a bit of an identity crises because he doesn't seem to be
able to figure out if he's himself or somebody else.
RJ: He certainly has the power and skill to win this match though.
CC: He sure does. I was very surprised when be beat Tuk Tuk, who
I thought was a much better wrestler, but he proved what he can do.
Virgo will have to be on his game to come out on top.
RJ: Virgo will have to at least show up.
CC: *laughing* good point.
RR: His opponent, from Kingston, Ontario.
["Tunderstruck by ACDC plays as the crowd roars it's approval.
They all like that Virgo guy.]
RR: Weighing in at 275 pounds. Being led to the ring by Mickey Dee, here
is the master of the Face Plant... Virgo!
[Mickey Dee leads Virgo to the ring and they are getting a lot of support.
When entering the ring, Virgo will slap hands, sign autographs, etc.
Whenever the theme music reaches the 'Thunder' chant, he thrusts his
fist into the air, getting the crowd worked up. On his way to the ring,
Virgo wears a long black trench coat, which he leaves open, and a pair of
mirrored shades on his eyes.his hands are covered with black fingerless
gloves. Once in the ring, he sheds the shades, and the trench coat, wrestling
in black jeans, snakeskin boots (steel toed), and his black gloves.]
RR: But folks.. there's just one little catch.... FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE!!!
[big pop from the crowd.]
RJ: The crowd is pumped, everyone is pumped. Who will be the first
International Champion?!
CC: It'll be a tough job for the referee, Ron Hoffa.. hey!
[The Reaper attacks Virgo before the bell.
The Reaper executes a backspin DDT.
The Bell Rings.]
RJ: Before the bell even goes we've got action! The huge man known as
the Reaper just smashed the skull of Virgo into the canvas.
CC: Reaper's an aggressive and unstable guy so you've got to watch
out for crazy stuff in that ring against him.
[The Reaper whips Virgo into the ropes.
Virgo goes for a flying clothesline, but The Reaper counters it with
a duck-down move.
The Reaper goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Virgo counters it with
a side step.]
CC: Boy does the Reaper look like a fool there trying to do a dropkick
to the knee! The man is 470 I think. That's way too much to be
executing any sort of a dropkick.
RJ: Now he's flat on his back.
CC: You're darn right he is.
[Virgo throws The Reaper out of the ring.]
RJ: Virgo dumps the Reaper to the outside of the ring through the second
and third ropes. He's running back and coming at him at full speed!
[Virgo jumps onto him with a Shooting Star, but The Reaper moves out of the way.
The crowd gasps as Virgo crashes on top of the French announcer's table.]
French Announcer: Oh Mon Dieux!
[The Reaper throws Virgo over the guardrail.]
RJ: Here we go! The Reaper has taken the action into the fans! This is what
falls count anywhere is all about. Remember Jagged Edge vs. Doug Bacon
for the SWF World Title?
CC: All too well. Fortunately they have real security guarding the fans now.
[The Reaper takes him down with a jumping DDT.
The Reaper goes for a choke slam, but Virgo blocks it.
Virgo executes a Russian legsweep.
They're brawling behind the guardrail.]
RJ: These two warriors are going at it tooth and nail. Both using their
advantages to their advantage. Virgo's speed and higher technical
knowledge and Reaper's power.
[The Reaper whips Virgo into the guardrail.
The crowd gasps.]
CC: Virgo has to stay out of brawling situations or he'll get murdered.
Period, exclamation point.
[The Reaper goes for a backspin DDT, but Virgo counters it with
a belly-to-belly suplex.
Ron Hoffa counts: One, two, kickout.]
RJ: He gets the big man up and over! One, two, and he kicks out!
CC: That was impressive Robert, Virgo is showing some strength I didn't
know he had.
[They're brawling down the aisle.
They're brawling down the aisle.
They're brawling in the back of the arena.
Virgo is busted wide open.]
RJ: Look at this will you! This has broken out into a massive fist fight with
Virgo taking the worst of it! They're back in the dressing room area just
pounding away on each other like there's no tomorrow!
CC: Virgo can't keep this up. Reaper is just too massive! He's just too
powerful. With him you can't fight power with power unless you're maybe
someone like a Moon Dog.
RJ: Virgo now has a cut over his eye.
CC: Bad to worse.
[Virgo knocks The Reaper into the arena wall.
They're brawling in the back of the arena.]
RJ: What intensity, these men have one thing in mind and that's the
International
gold. They are fiercely battling for the right to own that prestigious
championship.
[The Reaper nails him with a choke slam.]
RJ: Up and down! That's got to take a lot out of Virgo. Being slammed down
like that on the cement backstage. There's no padding.
CC: It takes something special to be involved in something and physically
dangerous
as the Falls Count Anywhere match. You have to be something you're not during
your regular matches to last the whole way.
RJ: Now the Reaper is going to force Virgo up.
[They're brawling up the arena stairway.
The Reaper knocks Virgo into the stairway.
They're brawling up the arena stairway.
They're brawling down the stairway.
They're brawling down the stairway.
They're brawling up the arena stairway.
The Reaper knocks Virgo into the stairway.
They're brawling down the stairway.
The Reaper knocks Virgo into the stairway.
They're brawling up the arena stairway.]
RJ: This is unbelievable! The fire! The emotion! The intensity!
These two men are battling it out like we've only seen before once and no
match could possibly live up to Bacon vs. Edge I.
CC: I don't know how Virgo is about to physically stand this kind of a
punishment from such a powerful man. I'm flabbergasted that he's brawling
with this man and not being taken a part.
[The Reaper goes for a Tombstone, but Virgo reverses it.]
RJ: Up he goes.. and no wait.. reversal... and Virgo tombstones
the Reaper! How about that!
CC: Look at this now! They're up in the first deck! This is absolutely nuts!
[They're brawling on the first floor.
Virgo throws The Reaper down to the first floor.
Virgo descends the stairs.
The crowd gasps as they have never gasped before! Plus some folks cheer
the fact that Virgo got the better of that and he's the face.]
RJ: OH GAWD!! OH MY GAWD!! Virgo just threw the Reaper down a
flight of stairs! That's insane! This is insane! I can't believe what I just
saw!
CC: Whoa... I've been in the wrestling business for a long time and I've seen
some crazy stuff, but this takes the cake! This... er... man got thrown down
a flight of stairs!! Look at him, he could have been killed! You talked about
intensity before Robert, well this is it at the highest level I can ever
imagine!
RJ: The Ripper is running through the crowd to get at Virgo!
CC: and folks that means something because Mr. Ripper is almost as large
as the man he manages!
[The Ripper tries to interfere, but Mickey Dee prevents him from doing so.]
RJ: Mickey Dee just risked life and limb for his wrestler! He has jumped on
The Ripper's back and he's choking him with a large handkerchief! Strange, yes,
but effective!
[Virgo is bleeding like hell.]
CC: Look at the blood just poor out of Virgo who's just about had it. Not quite
like the Reaper, but he isn't in good shape!
RJ: Virgo is lifting the Reaper off the ground and he's raised one arm in the
air
while looking into the seats! Is this what I think is coming!?
[Virgo executes the Face Plant and goes for the pin.
Major pop.]
RJ: WHOA! The-Reaper-Was-Planted!!
CC: Right on the cement floor! Face first! I guarantee his nose, if not every
other
part of his body, is broken! This has got to be it!
[Ron Hoffa counts: One, two, three.]
RJ: That's it!
CC: That's all!
RJ: Virgo is the champ!
[Mickey Dee jumps off the Ripper's back and the Ripper collapses due to lack of
oxygen caused by Dee's choking. Dee runs and jumps into Virgo's arms. Virgo
immediately puts him down and gives him a high five. "Thunderstruck" resumes
playing as the crowd is going crazy.]
CC: What a match! Two awesome and exciting championship matches in a row.
I'll tell you what Robert the title matches just bring a little something extra
to the table. Intensity, desire, all that and more.
RR: Ladies and gentlemen. The winner, and first SWF International Champion...
Virgo!
[loud pops all around as Virgo is finally handed his belt by referee Ron Hoffa.
He lifts it over his head as a collage of firework streams spray out of the pots
of gold at the entrance where Virgo is standing with Mickey Dee..]
RJ: Soak it in boys. You may never get to enjoy something like this again.
-----------------
(The footage fades as we return to Chip and The Fool.)
Chip: The Reaper soon returned to his native Amsterdamn, and is no longer in the SWF. Virgo
became Equalizer, turning on the fans and manager Mickey Dee.
Fool: And he went on to be a founder of Trinity, was the longest reigning International champion
ever, and then won the World Title. Not too shabby.
Chip: Indeed. And you will see Equalizer, in his first match back after his suspension, as he
faces Sean McKenzie tomorrow night for the International Title at Birthday Blast.
Fool: Two words for Scotch Guard: Face. Plant.
Chip: When we come back, we'll see some of the events taht led up to the formation of Trinity,
and the dissolution of Body Count.
------------------
(commercial for Birthday Blast)
------------------
(We return to Chip and The Fool in the studio. They are sitting in front of a picture of
of Bones Douglas and Pagan fighting over a fire extinguisher.)
Chip: Welcome back to the Best of the SWF. Don't forget that next week, Triumphant Tuesday
returns live from Madison Square Garden, as the SWF Television Title is defended for the first
time.
Fool: Let's get back to all these hardcore matches, Chipper. Are there any regular matches on
this special?
Chip: Only one, and we'll see it later. One wrestler who had an impact on the SWF from the
moment he entered was the mysterious man from New Orleans known as Pagan.
Fool: Pagan was controversial, and brought almsot as many complaints into the SWF as I did.
And he helped found Trinity, so you know he kicked ass!
Chip: But back then, there was no Trinity. Pagan challenged one of the legends of wrestling,
"Eazy" Eric Wright, to a table death match. But he ended up facing another "hardcore legend",
Wright's partner, Bones Douglas. Here's how that tremendous matchup went down:
--------------------------------------------
Bones Douglas vs. Pagan (Table Death Match)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Slaughterhouse.
Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, IN
August 2, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
BK: All right, this next match is a table death match. The only way to
win is to drive your opponent through a table, and have him be unable to
stand back on his feet within 10 seconds. Introducing first, accompanied by
his manager, Destiny, from New Orleans, Louisiana, weighing in at 246 pounds,
here is Pagan!!
["Death Wish" by Christian Death blares as Pagan and Destiny walk to the
ring. Also coming with them are Mr. Shhh's bodyguards Mr. Smith and Mr.
Jones. The crowd boos loudly.]
VM: What are Mr. Smith and Mr. Jones doing here? They have no right to
be here.
BK: And his opponent, From straight outta Compton, CA....[Referee Mark
Matarese gives Bobby Knight another card.] Ladies and Gentlemen, I have
just been informed that "Eazy" Eric Wright is on vacation. Taking his
place will be his tag team partner, Bones Douglas!!
["Them Bones" by Alice in Chains blares as Bones Douglas makes his way
to the ring as the crowd boos loudly.]
VM: Well we thought we're going to see Wright again, but instead we got
Bones.
[They lock up.
Bones Douglas executes an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas executes a Samoan Drop.
Bones Douglas executes a jack-knife power bomb.
Bones Douglas leaves the ring.]
VM: Bones is leaving already?
[He returns with a fire extinguisher.
Bones Douglas takes a swing at Pagan with the fire extinguisher, but
he gets out of the way.
Pagan snatches the fire extinguisher from him.
Pagan hits him with the fire extinguisher.]
JV: You get the feeling that isn't what Bones had in mind?
VM: You think?
[Pagan runs into the ropes.
Pagan misses with a clothesline.
Pagan hits Bones Douglas with a shoulderblock.
Pagan nails him with a chinlock deathlock submission.]
JV: Pagan's got that chinlock on pretty good. And right in the center
of the ring too.
[Bones Douglas manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 19 seconds.
Pagan takes him down with a standing moonsault.
Pagan takes him down with a side suplex.
Bones Douglas executes an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas executes an elbowsmash.]
VM: Bones trying to fight back with those elbows.
[Bones Douglas goes for a lariat, but Pagan counters it with a duck-down move.
Pagan goes for a spinebuster slam, but Bones Douglas counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Bones Douglas nails him with a DDT.
Bones Douglas goes for the Human Spade, but Pagan counters it with an eye
gouge.]
JV: Bones went for his finisher a bit too early.
[Pagan attempts to place Bones Douglas on the turnbuckle, but Bones Douglas
blocks it.
Pagan nails him with a swinging neckbreaker.
Pagan hits him with the fire extinguisher.]
JV: Damn! That actually put a dent in the fire extinguisher. I'm
surprised it didn't blow.
[Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a clothesline.
Pagan falls out of the ring.
Bones Douglas goes through the ropes.
Bones Douglas goes for the Human Spade, but Mr. Smith nails him with a
clothesline.]
JV: Now we know why they're there.
VM: He has no business being there! Someone needs to remove Mr. Smith
and Mr. Jones from the ring area.
JV: It's a no DQ match.
[Pagan places Bones Douglas on the turnbuckle.
Pagan goes for the Final Judgement, but Bones Douglas counters it with
a front-layout superplex.]
VM: Bones just nailed Pagan with a front layout superplex onto the
concrete below!!!!!
JV: But that hurt Bones almost as much as it did Pagan.
VM: Bones is getting back to his feet first.
[Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the guardrail.
Bones Douglas executes the Human Spade on the concrete floor.]
VM: Pagan got hit with that head first running powerslam finisher of
Bones's there.
[Bones Douglas knocks Pagan into the ringsteps.
Bones Douglas goes for the Human Spade, but Mr. Smith nails him with a
forearm to the back.
Mr. Jones hands Pagan brass knuckles.
Pagan hits Bones Douglas with the knuckles.
Bones Douglas is busted wide open.]
VM: As good as a wrestler Bones is, there's no way he can handle 3 on 1.
[Pagan goes for a Vader attack, but Bones Douglas counters it with
a fist to the midsection.
Destiny comes from behind, but Bones Douglas nails Destiny.]
JV: I don't even know why Destiny is bothering interfering if Mr. Jones
and Mr. Smith are out there.
[Pagan throws Bones Douglas back into the ring.
Pagan executes a German suplex.
Pagan nails him with a stomachbreaker.
Pagan takes him down with a grapevine.]
VM: Well Pagan seems to be more in control now thanks to Mr. Shhh's
bodyguards.
[Bones Douglas reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Pagan takes him down with a stomachbreaker.
Pagan goes for a side suplex, but Bones Douglas blocks it.
Bones Douglas takes him down with an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas goes for a clawhold, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan runs into the ropes.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a kick.]
VM: Bones now trying to brawl his way out.
[Bones Douglas goes for a spinebuster slam, but Pagan counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Pagan executes a swinging neckbreaker.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes, but Bones Douglas reverses it.
Pagan misses with a clothesline.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a kick.
Bones Douglas takes him down with the STF.]
VM: STF in the middle of the ring.
[Mr. Smith and Mr. Jones jump up on the ring apron.
Referee Mark Matarese warns them.]
VM: Thank you Mr. Matarese for not letting them in.
[Bones Douglas lets go after 22 seconds.
Bones Douglas nails him with a powerslam.
Bones Douglas places Pagan on the turnbuckle.
Bones Douglas nails him with a top-rope DDT.]
VM: Bones back in control with his version of the Fried Bacon.
JV: I wonder how his relationship with the Underground is.
[Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the turnbuckle.
Bones Douglas runs shoulder-first into the corner.]
VM: What do you mean?
JV: Well back in HOWF, he and Wright had formed Body count with the hope
of it becoming the next big alliance to take out the Underground and
RoT. I'm just curious if he still has those aspirations.
[Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the ropes.
Bones Douglas executes a sleeperhold.
Pagan manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Bones Douglas goes for a power bomb, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan executes a swinging neckbreaker.]
VM: Pagan stops the powerbomb and comes back with a swinging
neckbreaker.
[Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes.
Bones Douglas takes him down with a Samoan Drop.
Bones Douglas catches him in a power bomb.]
JV: That swinging neckbreaker was rather ineffective though.
[Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes.
Pagan hits Bones Douglas with a shoulderblock.
Pagan goes for a stomachbreaker, but Bones Douglas blocks it.
Bones Douglas takes him down with an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas runs into the ropes.
Bones Douglas misses with an elbow.
Bones Douglas misses with a shoulderblock.
Bones Douglas executes a fist to the midsection.]
JV: I want to take this opportunity to clear up something. Most people
think that a kick or a fist to the midsection is kicking or punching the
other guy's johnson. Well it isn't It's hitting or kicking the guy in
the stomach.
VM: Thank you for clearing that up for us Johnny.
JV: No problem.
[Bones Douglas executes a DDT.
Bones Douglas executes the Human Spade.]
VM: Another Human Spade by Bones!
[Mr. Jones gets up on the ring apron.
Bones Douglas nails Mr. Jones with a running forearm smash.
Mr. Jones goes flying off the apron and hits the guardrail.
Bones Douglas attempts to place Pagan on the turnbuckle, but Pagan blocks
it.]
JV: Even though Mr. Jones was sent crashing into the guardrail, it still
bought Pagan some time.
[Bones Douglas executes a reverse neckbreaker.]
VM: But not enough time.
[Pagan goes for a spinning backbreaker, but Bones Douglas counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the ropes, but Pagan reverses it.
Bones Douglas goes for a sleeperhold, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan takes him down with a forearm to the back.
Pagan goes for a waistlock suplex, but Bones Douglas counters it with
an elbowsmash.]
JV: You're gonna need to hit Bones with something more than a forearm to
the back.
[Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the ropes.
Pagan executes a side suplex.
Pagan takes him down with a grapevine.
Bones Douglas manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 10 seconds.
Bones Douglas runs into the ropes.
Pagan misses with a shoulderblock.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a clothesline.
Pagan falls out of the ring.
Bones Douglas goes through the ropes.]
VM: Back outside they go.
JV: Bones needs to be careful out there with the bodyguards.
[Bones Douglas catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Bones Douglas grabs a baseball bat from a fan.
Bones Douglas hits him with the baseball bat.]
JV: That's what he needs to do. He should hit Smith and Jones too.
[Bones Douglas sets up a table.
Bones Douglas throws Pagan back into the ring.]
VM: Bones setting that table up to be used in the future.
JV: And seeing how it is a table death match, it will be used.
[Bones Douglas goes for an armbar submission, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan executes a spinebuster slam.
Pagan executes a forearm to the back.
Pagan executes a stomachbreaker.]
VM: Pagan now in charge.
[Pagan executes a waistlock suplex.
Pagan takes him down with a single-leg takedown.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes, but Bones Douglas reverses it.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a kick.
Bones Douglas executes a sleeperhold.
Pagan manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 8 seconds.
Bones Douglas takes him down with a clawhold.
Pagan manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Pagan nails him with the STF.
Bones Douglas reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.]
VM: Neither men very successful with the submission holds there.
[Pagan goes for a German suplex, but Bones Douglas counters it with an
elbowsmash.
Destiny enters the ring and hits Bones Douglas with the chain.
Before Destiny connects, Bones Douglas moves out of the way.
Destiny hits Pagan.
Pagan is out cold.]
VM: Ouch! Destiny just nailed her own man.
JV: Pagan doesn't seem to be having much luck with his female managers.
[Bones Douglas throws Destiny over the top rope.
Bones Douglas executes the Human Spade.]
VM: Douglas just hit the unconscious Pagan with another Human Spade.
JV: BTW, did you hear that his brother Buster is making a comeback in
the world of boxing?
VM: I don't think they're brothers.
[Bones Douglas takes him down with a sleeperhold.
Pagan manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Bones Douglas nails him with a full nelson.
Pagan reaches the ropes after being trapped for 9 seconds.]
VM: Pagan smartly wrapping his leg around the ropes to break the hold.
JV: But now Pagan has to untangle himself which allows Bones...
[Bones Douglas executes a stomachbreaker.]
JV: to do that.
[Bones Douglas executes a piledriver.
Bones Douglas goes for a piledriver, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan goes for a vertical suplex, but Bones Douglas blocks it.
Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the ropes.
Pagan nails him with a swinging punch.
Pagan takes him down with a side suplex.
Pagan goes for a spinning backbreaker, but Bones Douglas counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Bones Douglas goes for a piledriver, but Pagan counters it with a backdrop.
Pagan executes a German suplex.]
JV: Nice suplex but those pinning suplexes don't do much good in a match
where you have to send you're opponent through a table.
VM: And actually, neither man has even tried that yet.
[Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes.
Bones Douglas goes for a short lariat, but Pagan counters it with
a duck-down move.
Pagan nails him with a forearm to the back.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes.
Pagan nails him with a spinebuster slam.
Bones Douglas is bleeding like a faucet.
Pagan attempts to place Bones Douglas on the turnbuckle, but Bones Douglas
blocks it.
Pagan throws Bones Douglas out of the ring.
Pagan goes through the ropes.]
VM: Back outside they go.
JV: And maybe this time someone will drive the other through a table.
[Pagan knocks Bones Douglas into the ringpost.
Mr. Smith hands Pagan a keyboard.
Pagan hits him with the keyboard.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the guardrail.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the guardrail.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the guardrail.]
VM: Pagan is just all over Bones out there.
[Pagan sets up Bones Douglas on the table.
Pagan tries to drive Bones Douglas through the table with a Tombstone, but he
blocks it.
Bones Douglas nails him with a Samoan Drop.]
VM: Well Pagan tried to drive Bones through the table.
JV: I liked that samoan drop off of the table and onto the concrete.
That'll knock the wind out of you.
[Bones Douglas reenters the ring.
Pagan follows him back in.
Bones Douglas executes a short lariat.
Bones Douglas executes the Human Spade.]
VM: Yet another Human Spade. How many of those can he take?
[Mr. Shhh comes down to ringside.
Bones Douglas takes him down with a full nelson.]
VM: What's Mr. Shhh doing here now?
[Pagan manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Bones Douglas takes him down with an avalanche.
Bones Douglas runs into the ropes.
Pagan executes a swinging punch.
Pagan gives the sign for the Final Judgement.
Pagan places Bones Douglas on the turnbuckle.
Pagan executes the Final Judgement.]
VM: Pagan finally hits Bones with his top rope double underhook DDT.
[Pagan throws Bones Douglas out of the ring.
Pagan jumps onto him with a plancha.
Pagan reenters the ring.
Bones Douglas follows him back in.]
JV: What the hell was that? Pagan had him exactly where he wanted him.
[Pagan nails him with a swinging punch.
Pagan attempts to place Bones Douglas on the turnbuckle, but Bones Douglas
blocks it.
Bones Douglas is bleeding profusely.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the ropes, but Bones Douglas reverses it.
Bones Douglas hits Pagan with a clothesline.
Pagan falls out of the ring.]
VM: And back outside they go.
[Bones Douglas goes through the ropes.
Bones Douglas nails him with a powerslam.
Bones Douglas sets up Pagan on the table.
Mr. Shhh slides underneath the table and braces the middle of it.
Bones Douglas executes a power bomb through the table.
The table didn't break.]
VM: Mr. Shhh just braced the table to prevent it from breaking!!!
JV: You gotta give Shhh some credit for thinking to do that. And it
worked. You can see that the table is clearly cracked.
[Bones Douglas pulls Mr. Shhh out from under the table.
Mr. Smith hits Bones Douglas in the back of the head with the brass
knuckles.
Mr. Jones whips Bones Douglas into the guardrail.
Destiny slaps Bones Douglas.
Mr. Shhh nails Bones Douglas with a vertical suplex.
Pagan punches Bones Douglas.]
VM: This is ridiculous! Five on one!!
[Bones Douglas catches Pagan in a power bomb.
Destiny comes from behind, but Bones Douglas nails Destiny.
Pagan takes him down with a piledriver.]
JV: No one can survive these odds. Not even Bones.
[Pagan knocks Bones Douglas into the ringsteps.
Pagan knocks Bones Douglas into the ringsteps.
Destiny comes from behind and distracts Bones Douglas.
Mr. Jones hands Pagan the brass knuckles.
Pagan hits him with the knuckles.
Pagan hits him with the knuckles.]
VM: Especially when they start using foreign objects on you.
[Pagan nails him with a spinning power bomb.
Pagan whips Bones Douglas into the guardrail.
Pagan goes for a figure-four leglock, but Bones Douglas blocks it.
Bones Douglas goes for a sleeperhold, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan goes for a spinebuster slam, but Bones Douglas counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Mr. Shhh hits Bones Douglas in the back of the head with a blackjack.]
VM: Bones desperately trying to fight back only to get him by someone
else.
[Bones Douglas whips Pagan into the guardrail.
Bones Douglas goes for a spinebuster slam, but Pagan counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Pagan sets up Bones Douglas on the table.]
VM: Now Pagan is going to try to drive Bones through the table.
JV: And it should be rather easy seeing how the table is already cracked.
[Pagan executes a Tombstone through the table.
The table is broken in half.]
VM: And straight through they went. Now Bones has to try to get up
before Matarese counts to 10.
JV: With it being 5 on one, he may be better off staying down.
[Mark Matarese counts: one, two, three, four, five,]
VM: Bones is not moving at all.
[six, seven, eight, nine, ten.]
VM: And Bones still hasn't moved as Pagan picks up the victory.
BK: The winner is Pagan, in a time of 21:48.
[Mr. Jones and Mr. Smith help Pagan back to the lockerrooms as
paramedics rush out to help Bones Douglas.]
VM: I for one hope that some form of disciplinary action is taken on Mr.
Shhh and his body guards.
JV: Nah. It was a no DQ match. Booker Frenck ain't gonna do it cuz he
thinks it's good for the ratings, Yvette is missing, so the only person
left is Ron Jones.
-------------------------
Chip: It was dirty tactics like the ones you saw which would later bring Pagan the SWF American
Title. He left the SWF following an injury and a bitter contract dispute with Brian Frenck,
and was last seen over in Japan.
Fool (shaking his hand): It's a conspiracy, I tell you. Bones Douglas left the SWF in September
to sign with another league. I have no idea where the hell he is now.
Chip: Well, we return after this break, we'll see how the battle over the Toughman Belt cost one
legendary wrestler his SWF career. Don't go away.
-----------------
(commercial)
-----------------
(We return to Chip and the Fool in the studio. They are standing in front of a picture of
President Frenck, announcing his takeover of the SWF.)
Chip: We're back with more of the Best of the SWF. August 1997 saw so much turmoil in the
SWF that many observers believed the federation would not survive.
Fool: Well, Equalizer got arrested for damn near killing Phoenix, no, I guess that wasn't
really Phoenix, was it? And Frenck bought out the SWF and started firing everyone.
Chip: But there was also some tremendous wrestling going on. Patrick Bordeau was forced to
vacate the SWF Toughamn Title due to injury.
Fool: His girlfriend broke his nuts with a hammer. No lie.
Chip: (* ahem *)...yes. Lethal captured the Toughman Title by outlasting twenty-four other
wrestlers, but wound up without the belt when it was stolen by Sandman.
Fool: He knew he'd get it eventually.
Chip: Lethal had beaten Sandman before, and he promised that if he lost the Toughamn Title
match to Sandman, he would leave the SWF for good. It all took place at the SWF Hostile
Takeover pay-per-view. This is the first time this match has ever been shown on television,
and you'll soon understand why.
---------------------------------
Lethal vs. Sandman (Ladder Match-SWF Toughman Title)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Hostile Takeover Pay-per-view.
Madison Square Garden, New York, NY
August 31, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
----------------
RA: The following is a title match for the SWF Toughman Title. The
stips are yet to be determined. Introducing first, from somewhere in
America, weighing in at 320 pounds, here is Sandman!!
["Enter Sandman" by Metallica blares as Sandman walks down to the ring.
He is carrying the SWF Tough Man Belt that he stole from Lethal several
weeks ago. The crowd boos loudly.]
RA: His opponent, being led to the ring by his manager Deadly, from
Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 256 pounds, here is the SWF Toughman
Champion, Lethal!!
[The arena is illuminated by police lights as sirens blare. Lethal and
Deadly make their way to the ring as several fireworks are launched.
Lethal is carrying his new SWF Tough Man belt with him. The crowd is
cheering Lethal on.]
RA: And to choose the stips, here is the new SWF President Brian
Frenck!!
["Cities on Flame" by Blue Oyster Cult blares as President Frenck (god
it feels weird typing that) walks down to the ring while a couple
roadies are pushing along a big wheel behind him. The crowd goes wild.]
BF: All right it's time to determine what the stips are going to be.
We've got over 50 different types of matches on this wheel. Only one of
them will be the match you are wrestling. [Prez. Frenck steps over to
the wheel and spins it.
[The wheel spins around several times before finally stopping on Ladder
match.]
BF: All right, it's going to be a ladder match.
[Roadies come running down with a ladder. Prez. Frenck looks at the 2
belts then holds up Sandman's belt]
BF: We'll use this one for the match.
[Prez. Frenck and the roadies head backstage.]
VM: All right, whoever grabs that belt will be the SWF Tough Man champ.
The bell has rung.
[They lock up.
Sandman takes him down with a powerslam.
Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes, but Lethal reverses it.
Lethal takes him down with a Samoan Drop.
Lethal nails him with a double chickenwing submission.
Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Sandman takes him down with a Tombstone.
Lethal attempts to place Sandman on the turnbuckle, but Sandman blocks it.
Lethal nails him with a low blow.]
VM: So far both men looking fairly even.
JV: Well these two have been preparing for each other for quite a while
now.
[Sandman places Lethal on the turnbuckle.
Sandman catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sandman nails him with a football tackle.
Sandman takes him down with a powerslam.
Sandman hits him with the ladder.]
VM: Oh MY!! Sandman just whacked Lethal in the back with that steel
ladder!
JV: That's not a bad move. Why not use it as a weapon?
[Sandman goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Lethal counters it with a
side step.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman knocks over the ladder with a shove.]
VM: Lethal going for that belt early on only to get knocked off.
[Sandman runs into the ropes.
Sandman goes for a thrust kick to the head, but Lethal counters it with
a duck-down move.
Sandman runs into the ropes.
Lethal goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Sandman counters it with a
side step.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Lethal knocks him off the ladder.]
JV: And Lethal returns the favor.
[Lethal executes a Vader attack.
Lethal nails him with a camel clutch.]
VM: Lethal has that hold on tight.
JV: And right in the middle of the ring. Sandman isn't going to be able
to grab the ropes in this one.
[Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 25 seconds.
Lethal goes for a Samoan Drop, but Sandman counters it with an elbowsmash.
Sandman takes him down with a Frankensteiner.
Sandman executes a double underhook piledriver.
Sandman chokes him with the ladder.]
VM: Sandman now choking Lethal with the ladder.
JV: I'm beginning to like this Sandman guy. He's definitely the more
hardcore wrestler.
[Sandman goes for a double underhook piledriver, but Lethal counters it with
a backdrop.
Lethal goes for a kneelock submission, but Sandman counters it with
a kick to the head.
Sandman hits him with the ladder.]
VM: Another vicious hit with the ladder.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes, but Lethal reverses it.
Sandman misses with a clothesline.
Lethal misses with an elbow.
Lethal misses with a clothesline.
Sandman misses with a clothesline.
Sandman takes him down with a clothesline.]
JV: Finally.
[Sandman nails him with a backbreaker.
Sandman goes for a reverse neckbreaker, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal goes for a Vader attack, but Sandman counters it with
a fist to the midsection.
Sandman chokes him with the ladder.]
VM: Things are not looking good for the Toughman Champ.
[Sandman runs into the ropes.
Sandman misses with a clothesline.
Lethal hits Sandman with a kick.
Zahadum comes to ringside.]
VM: Why it's IWF's Zahadum!
[Lethal goes for a Vader attack, but Sandman counters it with
a fist to the midsection.
Sandman nails him with a jumping DDT.
Lethal takes him down with a clawhold.
Sandman reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Lethal climbs to the 2nd turnbuckle and flexes his muscles.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman brings him down with a belly-to-belly superplex.]
VM: Huge Belly to Belly off the top of the ladder there.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the turnbuckle, but Lethal reverses it.
Lethal executes a flying sunset flip.]
JV: There's a useless move in a ladder match.
[Lethal whips Sandman into the turnbuckle.
Lethal goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Sandman counters it with a
side step.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Lethal pulls him back down.
Sandman hits him with the ladder.]
VM: Lethal prevents Sandman from reaching the top of the ladder, but
Sandman grabs the ladder and spins around, hitting Lethal right in the
left shoulder.
[Sandman executes a thrust kick to the head.
Sandman places Lethal on the turnbuckle.
Sandman catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sandman takes him down with a choke slam.
Sandman whips Lethal into the turnbuckle.
Sandman runs shoulder-first into the corner, but Lethal moves out of the way.
Lethal goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Sandman counters it with a
side step.
Sandman places Lethal on the turnbuckle.
Sandman catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.]
JV: Sandman is just all over Lethal.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes.
Zahadum pulls down the top rope.]
VM: It would appear that the unknown wrestler is here to make sure
Lethal leaves the SWF.
JV: Actually judging by Zahadum's reaction, I'd say that was a mistake.
[Sandman goes through the ropes.
Zahadum grabs a chair.
Zahadum goes to hit Sandman but hits Lethal instead.
Lethal is busted wide open.]
JV: BLOOD!!!!
VM: Zahadum hit the wrong man!
[The crowd pops. (in memory of Shawn)
Sandman goes for a backbreaker, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal whips Sandman into the guardrail.
Lethal catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Sandman sets up a table.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Sandman takes him down with a clothesline.
Sandman reenters the ring.
Lethal follows him back in.]
VM: Back inside they go.
[Sandman places Lethal on the turnbuckle.
Sandman catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Sandman executes the Sleeperhold.]
VM: Sandman has the sleeper on!!
[Lethal manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.]
JV: But Lethal quickly escapes.
[Lethal executes a cobra clutch.
Lethal lets go after 11 seconds.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman brings him down with a belly-to-belly superplex.]
VM: Another Superplex off the top of the ladder.
[Lethal nails him with a low blow.
Lethal is bleeding profusely.
Sandman places Lethal on the turnbuckle.
Sandman catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.]
JV: I bet Lethal is regretting making that promise now.
[Sandman goes for a football tackle, but Lethal counters it with a side step.
Lethal nails him with a Vader attack.
Lethal executes the STF.
Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Lethal takes him down with a clawhold.
Sandman reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.]
VM: Lethal trying various submission holds, but hasn't been very
successful.
[Lethal runs into the ropes.
Lethal hits Sandman with a kick.
Lethal nails him with a cobra clutch.]
JV: He's got this one on good.
[Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 19 seconds.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Lethal knocks him off the ladder.]
VM: And Lethal sends Sandman crashing to the mat.
[Sandman executes a jack-knife power bomb.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.]
JV: But that didn't deter Sandman at all.
[Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Lethal pulls him back down.
Lethal goes for a spinning power bomb, but Sandman counters it with
spinning headscissors.
Sandman chokes him with the ladder.]
VM: Sandman was very close to becoming the new SWF Tough Man champ
there.
[Sandman goes for a jack-knife power bomb, but Lethal counters it with a
backdrop.
Lethal leaves the ring.
He returns with a shovel.]
VM: A shovel?
JV: I'm guessing a weapon that a fan brought for the final match of the
Run of Death.
[Lethal takes a swing at Sandman with the shovel, but he gets out of the way.
Sandman snatches the shovel from him.
Sandman hits him with the shovel.]
VM: Unfortunately it didn't work for Lethal.
[Sandman throws Lethal out of the ring.
Sandman goes through the ropes.
Sandman nails him with a backbreaker.
Sandman sets up Lethal on the table.
Sandman tries to drive Lethal through the table with a Tombstone, but he
blocks it.]
VM: Lethal wants no part of that table.
[Lethal goes for a kneebreaker, but Sandman blocks it.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Sandman goes for a neck snap, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Lethal executes a kneebreaker.
Deadly comes from behind, but Sandman nails Deadly.
Lethal grabs a fire extinguisher.
Lethal hits him with the fire extinguisher.
Lethal knocks Sandman into the ringsteps.
Lethal hits him with the fire extinguisher.
Lethal takes him down with a low blow.
Lethal hits him with the fire extinguisher.]
JV: Now Lethal is living up to the reputation that his title has given him.
[Lethal whips Sandman into the guardrail.
Zahadum attacks Sandman from behind.
Peter Campbell admonishes Sandman.]
JV: What good is that going to do?
[Sandman executes a kick to the midsection.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Deadly comes from behind and distracts Sandman.
Zahadum ambushes Sandman from behind.
Peter Campbell admonishes Sandman.]
JV: That didn't work before, so it ain't gonna work this time.
[Sandman executes a facerake.
Deadly comes from behind and distracts Sandman.
Lethal sets up Sandman on the table.
Lethal tries to drive Sandman through the table with a Tombstone, but he
blocks it.
Sandman reenters the ring.
Lethal follows him back in.
Peter Campbell is back on the job.]
VM: Peter turns his attention back on the match instead of Zahadum.
[Sandman takes him down with an elbowsmash.
Sandman executes the Sleeperhold.
Lethal manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 7 seconds.]
JV: Sandman not having much luck with his finisher.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes.
Lethal misses with a clothesline.
Lethal goes for a flying clothesline, but Sandman counters it with
a duck-down move.
Lethal bumps into Peter Campbell.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Sandman dives for the belt, but he misses.]
JV: Sandman needs to work on his vertical leap.
[Lethal is bleeding like a faucet.
Zahadum climbs onto the ring apron.
Lethal goes for the a flying dropkick, but Zahadum accidentally knocks him off
the turnbuckle.
Sandman goes for a double underhook piledriver, but Lethal blocks it.]
VM: Sandman unable to capitalize on the unknown wrestler's interference.
[Lethal goes for a savate kick, but Sandman counters it with a duck-down move.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Sandman dives for the belt, but he misses.]
JV: He's no Michael Jordan.
[Lethal throws Sandman out of the ring.
Lethal goes through the ropes.
Lethal catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Zahadum tries to hit Sandman with a thrust kick.
Sandman ducks.
Zahadum hits Lethal.
Lethal is out cold.]
VM: And Zahadum has just knocked Lethal unconscious!!
JV: Things aren't looking good for the defending champ.
[Sandman is handed the sand.
Sandman hits him with the sand.]
VM: And to add insult to injury, Sandman throws that sand right into the
eyes of Lethal.
[Sandman sets up Lethal on the table.
Sandman tries to drive Lethal through the table with a moonsault, but he
moves out of the way.]
VM: Lethal smartly getting off the tale. And just in the nick of time.
[The table didn't break.
Lethal sets up Sandman on the table.
Lethal tries to drive Sandman through the table with a Tombstone, but he
blocks it.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Sandman executes a double underhook piledriver.
Sandman goes for a clothesline, but Lethal counters it with a duck-down move.
Lethal sets up Sandman on the table.
Lethal executes a Tombstone through the table.
The table didn't break.]
VM: Powerful tombstone, but it wasn't enough to break the table.
[Lethal whips Sandman into the guardrail.
Lethal sets up Sandman on the table.
Lethal executes a Tombstone through the table.
The table is broken in half.]
JV: He broke it that time. And now the champ seems to be in control.
[Lethal goes for a kneebreaker, but Sandman blocks it.
Sandman whips Lethal into the guardrail.
Sandman hits him with the sand.
Sandman whips Lethal into the guardrail.
Sandman knocks Lethal into the ringsteps.
Deadly comes from behind, but Sandman nails Deadly.
Zahadum tries to hit Sandman with a thrust kick.
Sandman ducks.
Zahadum hits Lethal.
Lethal is out cold.]
VM: And again Zahadum hits Lethal with a thrust kick, knocking him unconscious.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the guardrail.
Sandman goes for a backbreaker, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal knocks Sandman into the ringsteps.
Deadly comes from behind and distracts Sandman.
Lethal knocks Sandman into the ringpost.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Lethal whips Sandman into the guardrail.
Lethal nails him with a spinning power bomb.
Lethal is handed a keyboard.
Lethal hits him with the keyboard.]
JV: I've never understood why people bring keyboards to wrestling
matches.
VM: Me neither.
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Sandman grabs the keyboard from him.
Sandman knocks Lethal into the ringpost.
Sandman knocks Lethal into the ringpost.
Sandman takes him down with a clothesline.
Sandman whips Lethal into the guardrail.
Sandman throws Lethal back into the ring.]
VM: Sandman in control again and takes the match back inside.
[Peter Campbell is back on the job.
Lethal is bleeding like hell.
Sandman executes the Sleeperhold.
Lethal manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 6 seconds.
Sandman goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Lethal counters it with a
side step.
Lethal executes the Poison Ivy.
Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 17 seconds.]
VM: Both men trade finishers but Lethal comes out on top.
[Lethal nails him with a savate kick.
Lethal whips Sandman into the ropes.
Lethal goes for a flying clothesline, but Sandman counters it with
a duck-down move.
Sandman executes a bearhug.]
VM: Sandman has that bearhug on tight.
JV: Yeah but He's too close to the ropes. Lethal is frantically trying
to reach back and grab a hold of them.
[Lethal reaches the ropes after being trapped for 14 seconds.
Sandman nails him with a jack-knife power bomb.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Sandman dives for the belt, but he misses.]
VM: Maybe he needs new shoes?
JV: It's gotta be the shoes.
[Lethal goes for a kneebreaker, but Sandman blocks it.
Sandman takes him down with a bearhug.
Sandman lets go after 14 seconds.
Sandman nails him with a bearhug.]
VM: Sandman looses his grip on the bearhug but goes right back to it.
[Lethal reaches the ropes after being trapped for 6 seconds.
Sandman chokes him with the ladder.
Sandman attempts to place Lethal on the turnbuckle, but Lethal blocks it.
Sandman takes him down with a choke slam.
Sandman takes him down with a moonsault.]
VM: Sandman all over Lethal.
[Sandman goes for a short clothesline, but Lethal counters it with
a duck-down move.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman knocks him off the ladder.
Lethal executes a double chickenwing submission.
Sandman reaches the ropes after being trapped for 6 seconds.
Lethal nails him with a dropkick to the knee.
Lethal goes for a kneelock submission, but Sandman counters it with
a kick to the head.
Lethal takes the Brass Knuckles and uses it on him.]
VM: Lethal resorting to using foreign objects now.
JV: Well it's about time. Sandman has been using everything there is.
[Lethal whips Sandman into the turnbuckle.
Lethal charges into the corner.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman knocks him off the ladder.
Sandman goes for a sleeperhold, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal attempts to place Sandman on the turnbuckle, but Sandman blocks it.
Lethal takes him down with a spinning power bomb.
Sandman goes for a choke slam, but Lethal blocks it.
Lethal nails him with a Vader attack.
Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman pulls him back down.]
VM: Lethal is not having much luck climbing the ladder tonight.
JV: No he's not.
VM: LOOK OUT!!
[Deadly enters the ring and hits Sandman with the Baseball bat.
Sandman is out cold.]
VM: Deadly coming to Lethal's aid.
JV: Well Zahadum wasn't doing much good.
[Lethal takes him down with a clawhold.]
JV: What the hell is Lethal doing? Sandman is unconscious! Go climb the
ladder you fool!
[Sandman manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 14 seconds.
Sandman hits him with the ladder.
Sandman executes the Sleeperhold.]
VM: Sandman using his finishing hold now.
[Lethal manages to escape the hold after being trapped for 22 seconds.
Sandman executes a facerake.
Lethal takes him down with a Vader attack.
Lethal hits him with the ladder.
Lethal is bleeding like a faucet.]
VM: Lethal is going to need medical attention soon.
[Lethal executes the Poison Ivy.
Sandman reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Lethal nails him with a spinning power bomb.
Lethal goes for a figure-four sleeper, but Sandman blocks it.
Sandman hits him with the ladder.]
JV: That ladder is getting bent out of shape now. A couple more hits
and neither man may be able to climb it.
[Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes.
Lethal misses with a kick.
Sandman takes him down with a bearhug.
Lethal reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Sandman whips Lethal into the ropes, but Lethal reverses it.
Sandman misses with a clothesline.
Sandman hits Lethal with a backdrop.
Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.
Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Lethal brings him down with a belly-to-back superplex.]
VM: Sandman was just inches away from becoming the new toughman champ
when Lethal hit him with that Belly to back superplex.
[Sandman takes him down with a backbreaker.
Sandman runs into the ropes.
Sandman misses with a clothesline.
Lethal hits Sandman with a clothesline.
Lethal nails him with a flying dropkick.
Lethal goes for a Samoan Drop, but Sandman counters it with an elbowsmash.
Sandman goes for a Tombstone, but Lethal reverses it.
Lethal throws Sandman out of the ring.
Lethal goes through the ropes.]
VM: And back outside they go.
[Lethal nails him with a kneebreaker.
Lethal goes for a savate kick, but Sandman counters it with a duck-down move.
Sandman reenters the ring.
Lethal follows him back in.
Lethal brings the table into the ring.]
JV: They didn't stay out there too long.
[Lethal tries to climb the ladder.
Lethal is on his way up.
Sandman pulls him back down.
Sandman executes a backbreaker.]
VM: Brutal backbreaker!!
JV: I've never seen anyone bed that far back like that.
[Sandman tries to climb the ladder.
Sandman is on his way up.
Sandman is half-way up.
Sandman is almost on top of the ladder.]
VM: Sandman is going for the belt again. Lethal is still down, so the
only question is if Sandman is going to be able to jump high enough.
[Sandman is in grabbing distance.
Sandman has retrieved the belt.]
VM: HE DID IT!! We have a new Toughman Champion!!
RA: Here is your winner, and new SWF Toughman Champion, Sandman!!!!
[Sandman grabs the other toughman title and holds both belts over his
head as "Enter Sandman" blares. Zahadum hits Sandman with the chair and
Sandman goes down.]
JV: You're a little late Zahadum. The match already ended.
[Lethal goes to the top turnbuckle and jumps on Sandman with a flying elbow
drop, Zahadum then picks Sandman up and executes the Shadowbomb (Face first
powerbomb). Lethal takes a mic and speaks.]
Lethal: Come on Booker Frenck! I know I signed that thing that said that if I
lose I'll leave... but not like this... not to HIM! [Points at Sandman] Lethal
and Zahadum then leave the ring, Zahadum then points at Sandman and says: I'm
not done with him!"
[Zahadum, Lethal, and Deadly storm off to the lockerrooms.
VM: That match lasted 26 minutes and 2 seconds, but Sandman emerged
victorious.
JV: And that also means the end of Lethal in the SWF. But I'm sure we
haven't seen the last of him and Zahadum.
-----------------------
(We return to see Chip and the Fool in the studio.)
Chip: Johnny was wrong. We had seen the last of Lethal and his friends in the SWF. But before
he left, he had a tremendous career, including a classic World Title match Doug Bacon.
Fool: Which ended with Lethal tapping out. Look the guy was okay, but that was the match that
put Sandman on the match. Too bad he screwed it up by leaving Trinity.
Chip: That was one of the greatest matches in Sandman's career, and he'll have the opportunity
to regain that belt tomorrow night at Birthday Blast against the current Toughman Champion,
"Tiger" Tom Pho.
Fool: The hunt is on.
Chip: Fans, when we come back, we'll see what happened when a New York gangster collided with
an Original Gangsta. Don't touch that dial.
------------------
(commercial)
------------------
Chip: Fans, we're back with more of the Best of the SWF.
Fool: Is this the non-hardcore match?
Chip: Afraid so.
Fool: Boo!!!
Chip: Mr. Shhh has always been considered one of the most brilliant and merciless wrestlers
in the SWF. But at Hostile Takeover, a wrestler debuted who would challenge Mr. Shhh for
that honor.
Fool: The Original Gangsta, or O.G., was big, bad and proud. He quickly rose to become one
of the top contenders in the SWF. He along with his partner, Rock 'n Roll Animal, pissed off
a lot of people on their way up.
Chip: Mr. Shhh, who had actually been a member of the underworld prior to pursuing his SWF
career...
Fool: ...HAD been? You sure you wanna go past tense, Chip?
Chip: ...and Shhh took exception to O.G. saying that he wasn't a "real gangsta". These two
met for the first time, just days before a major SWF pay-per-view. And the Original Gangsta
would learn that Mr. Shhh had a LOT of friends in the SWF.
-----------------------------------
Mr. Shhh vs. The Original Gangsta
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Around the World.
Kiel Centre, St. Louis, MO
September 25, 1997
Announcers: Mike Azevedo and Rino Barino)
RB: That's right! The final match of the evening is about to start.
MA: O.G. Vs Mr. Shhh
[Is there a Heaven for a Gangsta by Master P begins to play]
MA: Well this can only mean one thing. O.G. is on his way down to the ring along with his
manager Mr. Bone Breaker!
RB: DA! BIG! DEAL!
MA: The 6'2" and 243 pound gansta, just stepped into the ring!
[Stayin' Alive by Siobhan Lynch begins to play as Mr. Shhh makes his way to the ring. Along with
Destiny, Mr. Jones and Mr. Smith]
RB: Wait a minute! Mr. Smith and Mr. Jones, where just attacked in the aisle by two men
wearing cowboy hats, red masks and white sweatshirts reading "Psychosomatic State".
MA: What the hell is going on? This match hasn't started yet!
RB: The two men under the masks are Rock 'n Roll Animal and Jukebox Hero.
MA: There brawling with Smith and Jones all the way back to the dressing rooms!
The Original Gangsta attacks Mr. Shhh before the bell.
RB: This match has officially started!
MA: THIS IS AN AMBUSH!
RB: What are you talking about.
MA: Look at the Westside of the ring, It's the Westside Ridas. On the Eastside it's The Thugz,
The Trinity is on the South side and Mr. Jones and Mr. Smith are sitting on the North side.
RB: What a minute they where just taken out of the match by The Animal and Jukebox!
MA: My sources tell me that something is happening in the back. Let's go back there.
[A camera shot is seen of 4 security cards holding The Rock 'n Roll Animal and Jukebox Hero]
MA: What's going on!
[A shot of Destiny is seen handing over a envelope to the head of security]
RB: HA HA HA HA Mr. Shhh paid the security cards off!
MA: I can't believe this!
RB: Lets get back to the match!
The Original Gangsta executes a German suplex.
Noodles counts: One, shoulder up.
The Original Gangsta goes for an inside cradle, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh nails him with a fist to the midsection.
Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
MA: I get the feeling that O.G. is in for a hell of a night!
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with a clothesline.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a double underhook suplex.
MA: The Original Gangsta is going for the pin.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta nails him with a bridging back suplex.
Noodles counts: One, two, thr... kickout.
The Original Gangsta executes a double leg cradle.
Noodles counts: One, two, shoulder up.
The Original Gangsta executes a double leg cradle.
Noodles counts: One, two, shoulder up.
MA: What GUTS and DETERMINATION by O.G. he is going head to head with Mr. Shhh regardless if he
is out numbered outside of the ring.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with an elbow.
The Original Gangsta places Mr. Shhh on the turnbuckle.
The Original Gangsta catches him in a belly-to-belly superplex.
Noodles counts: One, kickout.
RB: Mr. Shhh hasn't come up with a good move yet.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes, but Mr. Shhh reverses it.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with a clothesline.
Mr. Shhh falls out of the ring.
The Original Gangsta goes through the ropes.
RB: This guy is nuts! If he knows what's good for him, he'll get back into the ring.
MA: The Original Gangsta knocks Mr. Shhh into the ringpost.
Mr. Bone Breaker comes from behind, but Mr. Shhh nails Mr. Bone Breaker.
RB: He deserved that!
They're brawling on the floor.
The Original Gangsta nails him with a double underhook suplex.
The Original Gangsta nails him with a figure-four leglock.
Mr. Bone Breaker comes from behind and distracts Mr. Shhh.
The Original Gangsta executes a German suplex.
Mr. Bone Breaker comes from behind and distracts Mr. Shhh.
The Original Gangsta reenters the ring.
MA: O.G. is taking Mr. Shhh apart piece by piece.
Mr. Shhh follows him back in.
The Original Gangsta catches him in an inside cradle.
MA: Here's the pin
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a fisherman suplex.
Noodles counts: One, kickout.
MA: O.G. trying to end this one.
RB: Azevedo if you where surrounded by wrestlers wouldn't you try to win and get the hell out.
MA: You have a point.
The Original Gangsta goes for a fisherman suplex, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh takes him down with a kneebreaker.
Mr. Shhh nails him with a kick to the head.
Mr. Shhh goes for the Peacemaker, but The Original Gangsta counters it with
a bearhug.
MA: Nice counter.
Mr. Shhh reaches the ropes after being trapped for 6 seconds.
The Original Gangsta goes for a spinebuster slam, but Mr. Shhh counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Mr. Shhh goes for an Indian deathlock, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
The Original Gangsta nails him with a spinebuster slam.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta executes a kneebreaker.
The Original Gangsta is going for the pin.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta complains about a slow count.
The Original Gangsta goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh goes for a faceslam, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a crucifix.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
MA: O.G> simply all over Mr. Shhh.
The Original Gangsta attemps to place Mr. Shhh on the turnbuckle, but Mr. Shhh
blocks it.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the turnbuckle, but Mr. Shhh
reverses it.
Mr. Shhh charges into the corner, but The Original Gangsta lifts his leg.
The Original Gangsta goes for a Victory Roll, but Mr. Shhh counters it with
a sitdown.
MA: Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
Mr. Shhh executes a punch.
Mr. Shhh takes him down with a belly-to-back suplex.
RB: SHHH looks like he is finally generating some offence.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a double underhook suplex.
The Original Gangsta runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta executes a dropkick to the knee.
RB: I guess I'm wrong!
The Original Gangsta runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with an elbow.
The Original Gangsta is going for the pin.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Noodles counts: One, two, thr... kickout.
MA: Close call for Mr. Shhh
The Original Gangsta goes for a backspin DDT, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh goes for a sleeperhold, but The Original Gangsta counters it with
a jawbreaker.
The Original Gangsta runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta goes for the Gangsta's Paradise, but Mr. Shhh
counters it with a jawbreaker.
MA: Mr. Shhh knew what was coming and he countered it quickly.
Mr. Shhh whips The Original Gangsta into the ropes.
RB: Mr. Jones trips The Original Gangsta.
MA: Noodles warns Mr. Jones.
Mr. Shhh goes for a dragon suplex, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
Both Mr. Bone Breaker and Mr. Jones jump up on the apron.
Noodles tries to send them back down.
The Original Gangsta goes for a Frankensteiner, but Mr. Shhh counters it with
a power bomb.
RB: Shhh is being robbed!
There is no referee to count.
Mr. Shhh gets back up.
Mr. Shhh goes for an armlock leglock submission, but The Original Gangsta
blocks it.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes, but Mr. Shhh reverses it.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with an elbow.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a bridging back suplex.
There is no referee to count.
The Original Gangsta is going for the pin.
There is no referee to count.
MA: Both men getting robbed here!
RB: This should have been a no DQ match.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh hits The Original Gangsta with a kick.
Mr. Shhh throws The Original Gangsta out of the ring.
Mr. Shhh goes through the ropes.
MA: There going to kill eachother!
RB: Someone is going to end up seriously hurt.
They're brawling on the floor.
The Original Gangsta executes the Gangsta's Paradise on the concrete floor.
RB: Mr. Shhh is out cold.
MA: GOOD NIGHT!
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the guardrail.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a kneebreaker.
They're brawling on the floor.
Mr. Shhh executes a low blow.
The Original Gangsta throws Mr. Shhh back into the ring.
The Original Gangsta nails him with a Tombstone.
Mr. Shhh executes a belly-to-back suplex.
Mr. Shhh executes a scorpion deathlock.
MA: There is no referee there to ask The Original Gangsta.
RB: Noodles is finally back on the job.
The Original Gangsta reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Mr. Shhh executes a knee to the back.
The Original Gangsta executes a German suplex.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the turnbuckle.
The Original Gangsta runs shoulder-first into the corner, but Mr. Shhh
moves out of the way.
Mr. Shhh goes for a dragon suplex, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes, but Mr. Shhh reverses it.
MA: The Original Gangsta bumps into Noodles.
The Original Gangsta misses with a shoulderblock.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Shhh with a shoulderblock.
The Original Gangsta takes him down with a kneebreaker.
The Original Gangsta attemps to place Mr. Shhh on the turnbuckle, but Mr. Shhh
blocks it.
MA: The O.G. is just dominating this match.
The Original Gangsta places Mr. Shhh on the turnbuckle.
The Original Gangsta catches him in a double underhook superplex.
There is no referee to count.
Mr. Jones enters the ring and hits The Original Gangsta with a chair.
RB: O.G. was just clobbered with that chair.
Mr. Shhh goes for the pin.
There is no referee to count.
Mr. Jones puts Mr. Shhh on top of The Original Gangsta.
Mr. Shhh gets back up.
MA: Noodles is back on the job.
Mr. Shhh throws The Original Gangsta out of the ring.
Mr. Shhh goes through the ropes.
Mr. Shhh catches him in a dragon suplex.
MA: Mr. Bone Breaker comes from behind, but Mr. Shhh nails Mr. Bone Breaker.
The Original Gangsta goes for the Gangsta's Paradise, but Mr. Shhh
counters it with an elbowsmash.
Mr. Shhh whips The Original Gangsta into the guardrail.
Mr. Shhh takes him down with a punch.
Mr. Shhh throws The Original Gangsta back into the ring.
Mr. Shhh nails him with a German suplex.
Noodles counts: One, two, kickout.
RB: Mr. Shhh is back in this match.
Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta misses with a clothesline.
The Original Gangsta and Mr. Shhh get hit with a double clothesline.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes, but Mr. Shhh reverses it.
Mr. Shhh executes a faceslam.
Mr. Shhh executes a faceslam.
Mr. Shhh executes a kick to the head.
Mr. Shhh executes the Peacemaker and goes for the pin.
MA: Mr. Shhh nailed him with his finsher!
RB: Here's the pin.
Noodles counts: One, two, three.
MA: O.G. was jobbed! I can't believe this.
RB: The winner is Mr. Shhh. In a time of match: 10:14.
MA: Mr. Shhh just went to his corner, where Pagan, Mr. Jones and Mr. Smith is waiting for
him. The front row wrestlers all enter the ring.
RB: O.G. is lying there! There all taking turns using their personal finisher
moves on O.G.
MA: In the mean time Mr. Smith and Mr. Jones Places a table in the center of the ring. O.G. is
bleed profusely as he lies on the floor of the ring.
RB: Mr. Shhh and Pagan stand over top of O.G. Mr. Shhh picks him up by the hair, grins and
suplexes him on the top rope. Mr. Shhh nods at Pagan, Pagan climbs to the top rope and Mr. Shhh
grabs the microphone.
Mr. Shhh: "O.G. you are always saying how you are going to send us all to gangstas paradise
(Mr. Shhh points at O.G.) well You Go First!" Pagan performs Final Judgement on O.G. through
the table.
MA: Well we have got to get of there air.
[Scene fads as each wrestler is seen performing there finishing move]
----------------------------------
Chip: As a result of this attack, the Original Gangsta and Rock 'n Roll Animal started a stable
of their own, called "The Gangstas", to battle Trinity and Mr. Shhh. The war between these
two factions went on for months.
Fool: Mr. Shhh even joined the Gangstas back at Ides of March, in order to capture the SWF
World Title from Equalizer.
Chip: The Gangstas dissolved shorthly after the Original Gangsta left the SWF, but the feud
between O.G. and Mr. Shhh led to some of the most vicious and bloody contests in SWF history.
Fool: Well, that wasn't so bad for a regular match. Although some of the stuff that's happened
on Triumphnat Tuesday has been much bloodier.
Chip: Mr. Shhh will defend his World Title against Rock 'n Roll Animal tomorrow night at SWF
Biurthday Blast. Speaking of bloody, fans, when we return on Best of the SWF, you'll see the
birth of one of the toughest wrestlers in SWF history, in a bar on Long Island. Don't go away.
------------------
(commercial)
------------------
(We return to the studio and join Chip and The Fool, who are now standing in front of a giant
picture of God's Tears drinking a beer.)
Chip: Welcome back to the Best of the SWF.
Fool: We're almost done, right?
Chip: Right. Every wrestler in the SWF had to work their way up from the bottom. But for a
long time, it didn't look as though God's Tears would ever leave the bottom. For months, GT
was firmly lodged at the low end of the SWF rankings.
Fool: When Tears finally started a winning streak in late September, most of the SWF still
refused to take him seriously. Then he challenged a seasoned veteran, Rockin' Rebel, who had
held titles in a number of other leagues.
Chip: The match took place on national television, in a bar in Long Island. It was the SWF's
first ever Bar Room Brawl, and it served notice on the SWF that God's Tears was a force to be
reckoned with.
---------------------------------------
Gods Tears vs. Rockin' Rebel (Bar Room Brawl)
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Slaughterhouse.
Conry's Bar, Long Island, NY
October 19, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
VM: well it's time for our final match. This match is taking place in a
remote location. This match will be broadcasted from Conry's Bar in
Long Island, New York. Both men are already on the bar and referee
Scott Thomas is standing by waiting to start the match.
[Screen cuts to a shot of the inside of a bar. Gods Tears and Rockin
Rebel, along with his manager Heavy Metal are in opposite corners of the
bar. Scott Thomas gives the go ahead signal and the two men charge
towards each other.
Rockin' Rebel nails Gods Tears with an earringer.
Heavy Metal comes from behind, but Gods Tears nails Heavy Metal.]
VM: well this is a hard situation for Gods Tears. He's really fighting
two men at once.
JV: And Heavy Metal is no slacker either. He was Rebel's tag team
partner in IWF.
[Rockin' Rebel grabs a beer mug.
Rockin' Rebel takes a swing at Gods Tears with the beer mug, but he
gets out of the way.
Gods Tears snatches the beer mug from him.
Gods Tears hits him with the beer mug.
Rockin' Rebel is busted wide open.]
VM: Oh my! The shards of glass from the now broken beer mug get
inbedded in Rebels face.
[Gods Tears grabs a keg.
Gods Tears takes a swing at Rockin' Rebel with the keg, but he
gets out of the way.
Rockin' Rebel snatches the keg from him.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the keg.
The crowd is responding to Rockin' Rebel.]
VM: You can here the fans back here in Montana watching this on the
jumbotron responding.
[Rockin' Rebel executes a spinebuster slam on Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Rockin' Rebel is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Rockin' Rebel hits a bodyslam on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.]
VM: Rebel with a couple quick pin attempts there.
JV: Yes but these are texas death rules. the man then has to stay down
for a ten count.
[Rockin' Rebel executes a reverse neckbreaker on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel is bleeding like a faucet.
Rockin' Rebel executes a spinebuster slam on Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is cheering on Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a stomachbreaker, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Rockin' Rebel misses with a kick.
Gods Tears uses a Vader attack on Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel misses with a clothesline.
Rockin' Rebel executes an enzuigiri on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a Yakuza kick, but Gods Tears counters it with
a duck-down move.
Gods Tears hits him with the keg.]
VM: Gods Tears just hurled that keg at Rebel nailing him right in the
bread basket.
[Gods Tears is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a fist to the midsection.
Gods Tears gets a chinlock deathlock submission on Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel breaks the hold after being trapped for 9 seconds.
Gods Tears catches Rockin' Rebel in the Ziplock.
Rockin' Rebel breaks the hold after being trapped for 6 seconds.]
JV: Rebel has gotta play smart. he should just submit instantly and
then get back to his feet before the ten count. No sense spending extra
time in those holds.
[Gods Tears misses with a kick.
Rockin' Rebel hits an enzuilariato on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Rockin' Rebel knocks Gods Tears into the jukebox.
The crowd is cheering on Rockin' Rebel.
Heavy Metal comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.]
VM: Heavy metal again helping out his wrestler.
JV: Well that's how managers are invaluable.
[Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel grabs a beer mug.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the beer mug.
Gods Tears is busted wide open.]
VM: And now Gods Tears is busted open with the glass from the beer mug.
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a backspin DDT, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears sets up Rockin' Rebel on the pool table.
Gods Tears executes a brain buster through the pool table.
The pool table didn't break.]
JV: Those pool tables aren't like the cheap flimsy ones they use at
ringside.
[There's a small reaction to Gods Tears.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel over the bar.
Gods Tears uses a fist to the midsection on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears puts Rockin' Rebels head under the beer tap and pours beer on
him.]
JV: I bet Doug bacon wishes he were in this match right about now.
[Gods Tears hits Rockin' Rebel with a fist to the midsection.
Heavy Metal comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the broken beer mug.
Rockin' Rebel is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, kickout.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the broken beer mug.]
VM: That beer mug becoming a very dangerous weapon with it's sharp
edges.
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a hiptoss, but Gods Tears counters it with a facerake.
Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, thr... kickout.]
VM: Gods Tears almost got the first pin.
JV: There's no way that Rebel would've stayed down after a facerake.
[Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears with a power bomb.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
Rockin' Rebel has the crowd going wild.
Rockin' Rebel grabs a keg.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the keg.
The crowd is behind Rockin' Rebel all the way.
Rockin' Rebel executes a power bomb on Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is behind Rockin' Rebel all the way.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the keg.]
JV: I know Bacon is probably at home right now crying, seeing all this
beer go to waste.
[The crowd is giving Rockin' Rebel a standing ovation.
Rockin' Rebel grabs a pool cue.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the pool cue.
Gods Tears grabs the pool cue from him.
Gods Tears uses a Vader attack on Rockin' Rebel.]
VM: Gods Tears aparently just wanted to make sure Rebel wouldn't use the
pool cue on him.
JV: GT should've used while it was in his hands.
[Gods Tears goes for a kick to the head, but Rockin' Rebel blocks it.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears with an enzuigiri.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel rips a beer sign off the wall.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the beer sign.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.]
VM: Rebel just took that Budweiser neon sign off the wall and clocked GT
over the head with it.
[Rockin' Rebel chokes him with the beer sign.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Rockin' Rebel.
Heavy Metal comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel gets a clawhold on Gods Tears.
Gods Tears tries to escape the hold.]
VM: Rebel has that clawhold on.
JV: GT should just submit.
[Gods Tears is barely hanging in there.
Scott Thomas asks Gods Tears if he's still there.
Gods Tears nods.
Scott Thomas tells Gods Tears to respond or he'll stop the fight.]
VM: I don't think GT wants Rebel to get the first fall.
[Gods Tears nods.
Rockin' Rebel lets go after 25 seconds.]
VM: Rebel out of frustration finally lets go of the clawhold.
[Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel takes Gods Tears down with a spin kick.
Rockin' Rebel goes for an enzuilariato, but Gods Tears counters it with
a duck-down move.
Gods Tears grabs a keg.
Gods Tears hits him with the keg.]
JV: we're going through kegs faster than a fraternity on homecoming
night.
[The crowd is cheering on Gods Tears.
Heavy Metal comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel sets up Gods Tears on the pool table.
Rockin' Rebel tries to drive Gods Tears through the pool table with a jumping
DDT, but he blocks it.
Heavy Metal comes from behind, but Gods Tears nails Heavy Metal.]
VM: GT finally had enough of Heavy Metals interference.
[Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears over the bar.
Rockin' Rebel uses a chop on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel is handed a bowl of peanuts.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the bowl of peanuts.]
JV: Am I the only one that finds it sneaky that bars give you free
peanuts so you'll be thirsty and have to order a beer?
[Rockin' Rebel nails Gods Tears with a low blow.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears over the bar.
Rockin' Rebel knocks Gods Tears into the jukebox.
"Burning Love" by Elvis Presley starts to play on the jukebox.]
VM: That man is like Fonzie.
[Rockin' Rebel nails Gods Tears with a low blow.
Rockin' Rebel nails Gods Tears with an inverted power bomb.
The crowd is behind Rockin' Rebel all the way.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the bowl of peanuts.
The crowd erupts.]
JV: It's a bowl of peanuts people.
[They're brawling inside the ring area.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears onto the bar.
Rockin' Rebel flings Gods Tears down the bar.]
VM: And GT goes sliding down the bar and finally off the bar onto the
tile floor below.
[Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears over the bar.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel uses a choke slam on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.]
VM: Rebel is just all over GT.
JV: I really expected more from GT. After all, isn't a bar fight one of
the things he went to jail for?
[They're brawling behind the bar.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel over the bar.
Gods Tears uses a faceslam on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears grabs a pool cue.
Gods Tears hits him with the pool cue.
There are lots of chants for Gods Tears.
Gods Tears hits him with a pool cue.
Gods Tears executes a German suplex on Rockin' Rebel.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And Gods Tears gets the first pin.
[Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three, Rockin' Rebel gets back to his
feet.
There are lots of chants for Gods Tears.
Gods Tears goes for a headbutt, but Rockin' Rebel blocks it.
Rockin' Rebel uses a backbreaker on Gods Tears.
The crowd erupts.]
VM: Rebel fighting back after being pinned.
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a spinebuster slam, but Gods Tears counters it with
a kick to the head.
Gods Tears goes for a neck snap, but Rockin' Rebel blocks it.
Rockin' Rebel executes an enzuilariato on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel goes for an inverted power bomb, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears goes for an avalanche, but Rockin' Rebel counters it with a
side step.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Rockin' Rebel misses with a clothesline.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a choke slam, but Gods Tears counters it with
a kick to the midsection.
Rockin' Rebel bumps into Scott Thomas.]
JV: well it was bound to happen. Especially in this type of match.
[Gods Tears hits Rockin' Rebel with a clothesline.
Gods Tears grabs a pool cue.
Gods Tears hits him with the pool cue.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.
The crowd is cheering on Gods Tears.
Heavy Metal comes from behind, but Gods Tears nails Heavy Metal.
Rockin' Rebel nails Gods Tears with an over-the-shoulder stomachbreaker.
Rockin' Rebel takes Gods Tears down with an enzuilariato.
Rockin' Rebel is going for the pin.
There is no referee to count.]
VM: Scott Thomas is still down, and Heavy Metal is trying to revive him.
JV: Try getting him a beer. He's quite the drinker I hear.
VM: Really?
JV: Oh yeah, I've heard that he and Bacon go out drinking together all
the time.
[Rockin' Rebel gets back up.
Gods Tears hits him with the pool cue.
Gods Tears is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a legsweep.
Heavy Metal comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel grabs a bowl of peanuts.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the bowl of peanuts.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with a bowl of peanuts.]
JV: Rebel really needs to learn how to choose his weapons better.
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a Yakuza kick, but Gods Tears counters it with
a duck-down move.]
VM: And Rebels foot went crashing through the jukebox!!!
JV: Too bad. I liked that Elvis song.
[Gods Tears is going for the pin.
There is no referee to count.
Scott Thomas is back on the job.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three.]
VM: And GT has scored another pinfall.
[The crowd is really behind Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, Rockin'
Rebel gets back to his feet.]
JV: But Rebel still manages to make it back to his feet.
[Rockin' Rebel executes an enzuilariato on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a DDT, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a punch.
Gods Tears uses a headbutt on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears goes for the Hurt, but Rockin' Rebel counters it with an elbowsmash.
Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears.
The crowd erupts.
Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears.
Gods Tears chops Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears.
The crowd erupts.
Rockin' Rebel punches Gods Tears.]
VM: And this is the type of brawl we were expecting coming into this
match.
[The crowd is behind Rockin' Rebel all the way.
Gods Tears punches Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Rockin' Rebel kicks Gods Tears.
The crowd erupts.
Rockin' Rebel is bleeding profusely.
Rockin' Rebel uses a backspin DDT on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.]
VM: GT barely gets his shoulder up in time.
[Gods Tears is bleeding like a faucet.
Rockin' Rebel executes a hiptoss on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a spinning DDT, but Gods Tears counters it with
a backdrop.
Gods Tears executes a European uppercut on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears hits a kick to the midsection on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears executes a jawbreaker on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
There are lots of chants for Gods Tears.
Gods Tears goes for a Tombstone, but Rockin' Rebel reverses it.
The chants for Rockin' Rebel are deafening.]
VM: Excellent reversal there by Rebel.
JV: Good thing too. One of those could put him away.
[Rockin' Rebel is handed a pool cue.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the pool cue.
Rockin' Rebel puts Gods Tears in a figure-four leglock.
Gods Tears' shoulders are on the floor.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Gods Tears' shoulders are on the floor.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Gods Tears' shoulders are on the floor.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.]
VM: Gods Tears in obvious pain from that figure four as he had to lie
back on to the floor several times there.
JV: And almost got himself pinned that way too.
[Rockin' Rebel lets go after 15 seconds.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the pool cue.
Rockin' Rebel takes Gods Tears down with a spinebuster slam.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a fist to the midsection.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a football tackle.
Rockin' Rebel is bleeding like a faucet.
Rockin' Rebel hits Gods Tears with an elbow.
Rockin' Rebel gives the sign for the Head Rocker.
Rockin' Rebel executes the Head Rocker on Gods Tears.]
VM: There's Rebel's running powerbomb finisher and here's the pin!
[The crowd erupts.
Rockin' Rebel goes for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three.
The crowd erupts.]
VM: And Rebel finally gets a pin in this match.
[Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three, four, five, Gods Tears gets back
to his feet.
They lock up.
Rockin' Rebel takes a swing at Gods Tears with the beer mug, but he
gets out of the way.
Gods Tears snatches the beer mug from him.
Gods Tears hits him with the beer mug.]
JV: Those beer mugs are really expensive too.
[The crowd is really behind Gods Tears.
Gods Tears uses a legsweep on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears gets a chinlock deathlock submission on Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel breaks the hold after 5 seconds.
Rockin' Rebel hits a jumping DDT on Gods Tears.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a reverse neckbreaker, but Gods Tears counters it with
a facerake.
Gods Tears uses a dropkick to the knee on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a neck snap.
Gods Tears sets up Rockin' Rebel on the pool table.
Gods Tears executes a brain buster through the pool table.
The pool table didn't break.]
VM: Huge brainbuster on the pool table.
JV: There's no way those things are going to break. They're just too
damn sturdy.
[Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, kickout.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel onto the bar.
Gods Tears flings Rockin' Rebel down the bar.]
VM: Rebel gets thrown down the bar and into the wall.
[They're brawling behind the bar.
Gods Tears hits Rockin' Rebel with a kick to the midsection.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a faceslam.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a kneedrop.
Gods Tears grabs a bowl of peanuts.
Gods Tears hits him with the bowl of peanuts.]
JV: Did you know that peanuts are loaded with cholesterol?
[The crowd erupts.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel over the bar.
Gods Tears hits a fist to the midsection on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears hits him with the bowl of peanuts.
Gods Tears uses a European uppercut on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears executes a neck snap on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears hits him with a bowl of peanuts.
Gods Tears hits him with the bowl of peanuts.]
JV: Get a new weapon GT!
[Rockin' Rebel hits a DDT on Gods Tears.
The crowd is giving Rockin' Rebel a standing ovation.
Rockin' Rebel uses a spinning power bomb on Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, shoulder up.]
VM: Rebel just a one count away from getting his seconf pin.
[The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Gods Tears goes for a football tackle, but Rockin' Rebel counters it with
a side step.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Heavy Metal comes from behind, but Gods Tears nails Heavy Metal.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel executes an enzuilariato on Gods Tears.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Rockin' Rebel.]
VM: Rebel seems to have gotten his second wind and is just all over GT.
[Rockin' Rebel is handed a bowl of peanuts.
Rockin' Rebel hits him with the bowl of peanuts.]
JV: Nice weapon choice there Heavy Metal.
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a spinning power bomb, but Gods Tears counters it with
an enzuilariato.
The crowd erupts.
Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.]
VM: Almost a three count.
[Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a fist to the midsection.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
They're brawling behind the bar.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears over the bar.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a backspin DDT, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears goes for a Vader attack, but Rockin' Rebel counters it with
a fist to the midsection.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Rockin' Rebel executes a spinning power bomb on Gods Tears.
Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.]
VM: And Rebel gets another pin. Will that be enough to win the match?
[Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
Gods Tears gets back to his feet.]
JV: Nope. But we're getting closer. I'm not sure how much more either
of these men can take.
[Gods Tears hits a Vader attack on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears hits Rockin' Rebel with a kick to the head.
The crowd is giving Gods Tears a standing ovation.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a kneeling headbutt.
Gods Tears goes for an avalanche, but Rockin' Rebel counters it with a
side step.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a reverse neckbreaker, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears hits an avalanche on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears hits a knee to the back on Rockin' Rebel.]
VM: And it seems that Gods Tears has realized the same ting you did
Johnny and is going all out.
[Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears misses with a kick.
Rockin' Rebel misses with a clothesline.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a legsweep.
Gods Tears executes a kneeling headbutt on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears knocks Rockin' Rebel into the jukebox.
"Mustang Sally" plays at the wrong speed.]
JV: Sounds like something you'd listen to when your stoned.
[Gods Tears has the crowd going wild.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel over the bar.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a fist to the midsection.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a forearm to the back.
Gods Tears grabs a beer bottle.
Gods Tears hits him with the beer bottle.
Gods Tears has the crowd going wild.
Gods Tears hits him with the beer bottle.]
VM: These two men are just tearing up the bar and using everything at
their disposal.
[The chants for Gods Tears are deafening.
Heavy Metal comes from behind, but Gods Tears nails Heavy Metal with the
beer bottle.]
VM: Oh my! I think Heavy Metal is out cold!
[Rockin' Rebel goes for an inverted power bomb, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears hits a football tackle on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears grabs a napkin dispenser.
Gods Tears hits him with the napkin dispenser.
The chants for Gods Tears are deafening.
Gods Tears hits him with the napkin dispenser.]
JV: Much better choice. those metal napkin dispensers hurt a hell lot
more than a bowl of peanuts.
VM: What about walnuts?
JV: Oh, well, walnuts are a different story. They're extremely hard if
they're still in the shell.
[The crowd is on its feet cheering for Gods Tears.
Gods Tears hits him with a napkin dispenser.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.
Gods Tears hits him with the napkin dispenser.
Gods Tears takes Rockin' Rebel down with a Vader attack.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.]
VM: I don't think we've seen any offense from Rebel since the last
pinfall.
[They're brawling behind the bar.
Gods Tears throws Rockin' Rebel over the bar.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a jawbreaker.
The crowd erupts.
Gods Tears nails Rockin' Rebel with a faceslam.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Gods Tears.
Gods Tears whips Rockin' Rebel into the bar.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a punch, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Rockin' Rebel sets up Gods Tears on the pool table.
Rockin' Rebel executes a power bomb through the pool table.
The pool table is broken in half.]
VM: The pool table broke!! The pool table broke!!!
JV: That was one viscious powerbomb.
[The crowd is giving Rockin' Rebel a standing ovation.
Rockin' Rebel throws Gods Tears over the bar.
Rockin' Rebel executes a punch on Gods Tears.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the bar.]
JV: What's he doing? He should've pinned GT after that powerbomb. No
way he would've gotten up from that.
[Rockin' Rebel uses a stomachbreaker on Gods Tears.
Gods Tears is bleeding like hell.
Rockin' Rebel whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears executes a legsweep on Rockin' Rebel.
Gods Tears executes the Hurt on Rockin' Rebel.
Rockin' Rebel summons one last burst of energy.]
VM: And GT is just repeatedly bashing Rebels head into the jukebox.
JV: I'd wish he stop. It's causing the 45 to skip.
VM: But it's playing at 33 speed.
JV: I know but I'm beginning to like it like this.
[Scott Thomas tells Rockin' Rebel to respond or he'll stop the fight.
Rockin' Rebel nods.
Rockin' Rebel is close to passing out from the pain.
Scott Thomas checks Rockin' Rebel's arm.
He lifts it... it falls.]
VM: Meanwhile GT continues to ram Rebels head into that jukebox as Scott
Thomas checks to see if he's even still conscious.
[He lifts it... it falls.
He lifts it... it falls.
Scott Thomas stops the match after 32 seconds.
The crowd is giving Gods Tears a standing ovation.]
VM: And GT has let go of Rebel who is lying unconcious on the floor of
the bar. The ten count is merely a technicality now.
[Scott Thomas counts: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine, ten.]
VM: And GT gets the win.
DO: The winner is Gods Tears, in a time of 30:32.
VM: Well we are out of time. we will see you next week. So long.
-----------------------
(We return to Chip and The Fool in the studio. The Fool is munching on a bowl of peanuts.)
Chip: Rockin' Rebel left the SWF shortly after that. God's Tears went on to become the longest
reigning Toughman Champion in SWF history.
Fool: Truth is stranger than fiction, friends.
Chip: You'll get to see God's Tears tomorrownight at Birthday Blast as he wrestles twice.
First, he will face his former partner, Flash, in a lumberjack match, then he will try to win
the SWF American Title from Hot Shot Dobnovan.
Fool: No chance. Donovan is Trinity, and GT will be exhausted. But I say GT can take Flash
tomorrow night. Flash has too many enemies in this lumberjack match.
Chip: A good point. When we come back, we'll wrap things up and show some highlights from
last year's Bunkhouse Brawl Royal Rumble.
-------------------
(commercial)
-------------------
Chip: Welcome back to the Best of the SWF special. We'll return next week at our regular time
for Triumpahnt Tuesday.
Fool: Good. Tonight was great, but I'm not cut out for recap shows.
Chip: We have several minutes remaining, so The Fool and I are going to run down tomorrow
night's Birthday Blast pay-per-view.
Fool: The hell we are! I knew you would try to hog this entire show, but I got together with
McNeill and the guys in the truck, and I put together my own tribute to the first year of the
SWF!
Chip: You did WHAT?
Fool: Roll tape!
-----------------------
(We see a montage of hazy clips, playing over the soothing music of "The Way we Were" by
Barbara Streisand.)
(A clip of The Underground, stuffing Jagged Edge into a coffin.)
# Memories, like the corners of my mind #
(Clip of Pagan lighting Tom Pho on fire.)
# Misty water color memories #
(Clip of Mr. Shhh choking Bob Gorman with barbed wire.)
# of the way we were #
(Clip of Sound & Fury injuring Piper Jones' neck.)
# Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind #
(Clip of Rock 'n Roll Animal moonsaulting David Storm through a table.)
# Smiles we gave to one another #
(Clip of the Men in Black "wishboning" Rock 'n Roll Animal over the guardrail.)
# For the way we were #
(Clip of the Gods of Destruction hitting the Canadian Bash Brothers with their hammers.)
# Can it be that it was all so simple then #
(Clip of Pagan breaking his crutch over Moon Dog Gator.)
# Or has time rewritten every line? #
(Clip of John McGee supergluing HardRock.)
# If we had the chance to do it all again #
(Clip of Original Gangsta jumping the railing to attack God's Tears.)
# Tell me, would we? #
(Clip of Mr. Meteorite #69 beating a bloody Dewy Hicks.)
# Could we? #
(Clip of the Thugz bungee jumping onto Sound & Fury.)
# Memories may be beautiful and yet #
(Clip of Sandman dropping a sandbag on Tom Pho.)
# What's too painful to remember #
(Clip of Doug Bacon hitting Sandman with a frying pan.)
# We simply choose to forget #
(Clip of Equalizer Face Planting referee Chris Carroll)
# So it's the laughter we will remember #
(Clip of Mr. Shhh putting a crown of barbed wire on King Cobra.)
# Whenever we remember #
(Clip of God's Tears hitting Rockin' Rebel with a beer bottle.)
# the way we were #
(Clip of Tuk Tuk the Eskimo stuffing Zamron the Martian into a freezer.)
# The way we...were #
(Clip of Pagan putting Bones Douglas through a table as the song ends.)
----------------------------
(We return to the studio, with The Fool wiping fake tears from his eyes.)
Fool: (* sniff *) That was beautiful....I...I need a moment.
Chip: That was sick!
Fool: (* sniff *) Thank you. Me, I was moved.
Chip: Fans, we're finishing up tonight with highlights from last year's Bunkhouse Brawl
Battle Royal. We'll join you tomorrow from the Baltimore Arena for Birthday Blast LIVE
and on pay-per-view. For Tim Thorsen, I'm Chip Collins. Don't miss it!
Fool: Be there!
------------
1997 Bunkhouse Brawl Royal Rumble
(Footage Courtesy of: SWF Slaughterhouse.
Texas Stadium, Irving, TX
July 19, 1997
Announcers: Vance McMihn and Johnny Ventures)
Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen, SWF Slaughterhouse is please to
bring you the Bunkhouse Brawl Royal Rumble for the SWF Tough Man Belt!!
[crowd goes wild] The first wrestler is Jagged Edge!! [Jagged Edge
walks down to the ring, carrying a pair of spiked brass knuckles.]
JV: I see Edge has decided to take a page from The Mobster's book when
it comes to foreign objects.
RA: The 2nd wrestler is Sandman!! [Sandman comes down to the ring
carrying a pitchfork.]
VM: And it looks like Sandman is going for the farmer's weapon. Look
out!!!
[Jagged Edge nails him with the spiked brass knuckles.]
VM: Jagged Edge not wasting any time as he hit Sandman with the knux as
he was entering the ring.
JV: Well both of these men got bad draws so they gotta use every dirty
trick there is in order to stay alive.
[Jagged Edge nails him with a choke slam.
Jagged Edge catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Jagged Edge nails him with a Gorilla Press.
Jagged Edge takes him down with a bearhug.]
VM: Edge is all over the stunned Sandman!
JV: He's got that Bearhug on tight. And if there's a time to go for
submission moves, it's now since later on, someone will just about
always attack you while you're applying a submission hold.
[Sandman breaks the hold after 23 seconds.
Sandman whips Jagged Edge into the ropes, but Jagged Edge reverses it.
Jagged Edge nails him with a choke slam.
Jagged Edge executes the Shattered Dreams.]
VM: Sandman hasn't had a bit of offense yet. And already Edge has gone
for his finisher.
JV: And he's got it on good right there in the middle of the ring. If
this were a regular match, I'd say Edge would win, but unfortunately, you
can't win via submission in a BBRR.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Sandman executes a facerake. | [Dean Oberman is standing outside a
Sandman nails him with a bearhug. | lockerroom door and knocks on it.
| Gods Tears opens the door.]
| GT: What?
| DO: I'm Dean Oberman. I was
| wondering if I could talk to you
| about the BBRR?
| GT: Eh, no...go away...I'm taking...
| eh, my medicine.
| [GT swoons in XTC over is small vial
| of JD that he snuck in.]
| DO: It'll only take a moment of your
| time.
| GT: What's the magic word?
| DO: please?
| GT: ok.
| DO: What are your feelings on the
| BBRR?
| GT: Feelings? Nothing more than
Jagged Edge breaks the hold after | feelings?
22 seconds. | DO: uh, yeah, what are they?
Jagged Edge catches him in a | GT: I'm a bit dizzy, hard to walk
belly-to-belly suplex. | straight. Oh, the match kinda
Jagged Edge punches Sandman with | feelings?
the spiked brass knuckles | DO: Yes.
Sandman swings at Jagged Edge with | GT: ok.
the pitchfork, but misses as | DO: What do you think are the chances
Jagged Edge ducks. | that you'll be the new TM Champ?
Jagged Edge goes for a Gorilla | GT: ok.
Press, but Sandman counters it |
with a rolling reverse cradle. |
Sandman nails him with the |
pitchfork.] |
|
RA: Gods Tears!! | [Gods Tears heads toward the ring
| entrance.]
[End Split Screen]
[Gods Tears runs to the ring with a rusty cheese grater strapped to his
arm.]
VM: And here comes Gods Tears with a kitchen utensil.
JV: Judging by that interview with Oberman, I'm not sure He's quite with
it tonight.
[Jagged Edge hits Sandman with the spiked brass knuckles.
Sandman swipes at him with the pitchfork.
Jagged Edge is cut open
Sandman tries to throw Jagged Edge over the top rope.
Jagged Edge has been eliminated.]
RA: Jagged Edge has been eliminated from the BBRR!!
VM: And after giving Edge four long cuts on his chest, Sandman is
successfully able to eliminate him.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Zodiac goes for the Running Forearm Smash, but Gods Tears counters it
with a duck-down move.
Gods Tears whips Zodiac into the ropes.
Zodiac misses with a shoulderblock.
Gods Tears misses with an elbow.
Zodiac catches him in a belly-to-belly suplex.
Zodiac tries to throw Gods Tears over the top rope.
Gods Tears has been eliminated.]
RA: Gods Tears has been eliminated from the BBRR!!
VM: Zodiac realizes his mistake in saving Gods Tears and throws him over
the top-rope. Wait a minute! Gods Tears is coming up the stairs
towards us.
[Split Screen]
[Sandman hits Zodiac with the | [Gods Tears comes running towards
pitchfork. | the broadcast booth. GT hits Johnny
Zodiac hits him with the SWF Tag | with a punch. JV stands up and
Team Belt. | takes off his headsets. GT hits
Zodiac whips Sandman into the | JV with the cheese grater. JV
turnbuckle. | punches GT. JV and GT start
Zodiac charges into the corner. | exchanging blows. JV hits GT
Zodiac takes him down with a | with a reverse neckbreaker. GT
flying bulldog. | nails JV with a bodyslam. JV
Sandman goes for an armdrag | hits GT with a kick to the head.
takedown, but Zodiac counters it | JV hits GT with a short
with a lariat. | clothesline. GT hits JV with a
Rockin' Rebel zaps Zodiac with the | single leg takedown. GT stomps on
cattle prod.] | JV.
|
RA: Tuk Tuk The Eskimo!! |
|
[Zodiac hits Rockin' Rebel with | [Tuk Tuk starts to run to the ring
the SWF Tag Team Belt. | but then turns and heads to the
Sandman hits Rockin' Rebel with | broadcast booth. GT is still
the pitchfork. | stomping on JV. TT hits GT in the
Rockin' Rebel goes for a backspin | back with the kayak paddle. TT
DDT, but Sandman counters it with | nails GT with a brainbuster on the
a belly-to-belly suplex. | concrete. GT is out cold.
Rockin' Rebel zaps Sandman with | TT helps JV back up. TT picks up
the cattle prod. | his kayak paddle and heads to the
Rockin' Rebel nails him with a | ring. Security guards remove GT.
punch.] | JV puts his headsets back on & sits.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
--------------------------------------------------------------- [End Split Screen]
RA: Marc Jasper "The Chimera"!!
[Marc Jasper runs to the ring carrying a pillow. Tuk Tuk levels him
with a clothesline along the way. Jasper gets back and runs into the
ring.]
JV: A pillow? Jasper is bringing a pillow to the ring? What a dork!
VM: Well maybe the pillow is filled with rocks or something?
[Marc Jasper attacks Rockin' Rebel.
Marc Jasper hits Rockin' Rebel with the pillow.
Rockin' Rebel turns around and says "A pillow? What a loser!"
Marc Jasper goes for a kick to the thigh, but Rockin' Rebel blocks it.
Rockin' Rebel takes him down with a backspin DDT.]
VM: Ok, maybe it's just a regular pillow.
JV: Even other wrestlers are laughing at him now. This was not a good
move by Jasper.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
RA: Virgo!!
[Virgo runs to the ring carrying a moon rock.]
JV: There's a rather odd weapon.
[Virgo hits Mr. Roboto with a jumping side kick.
Virgo executes a handspring elbow.
Virgo takes him down with a leg lariat.
Virgo hits him with the moon rock.]
JV: Did you know it is illegal to own a moon rock in the United States?
VM: I did not know that. Why do you suppose that is?
JV: I'm guessing to prevent any NASA scientists from stealing a moon
rock and fencing it.
[Virgo tries to throw Mr. Roboto over the top rope.
Mr. Roboto has been eliminated.]
RA: Mr. Roboto has been eliminated from the BBRR!
JV: Yeah, like he had a chance.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Zodiac whips Marc Jasper into the | DO: Vance, I'm here with another
turnbuckle. | new wrestler, Mr. Shhh. Mr. Shhh,
Zodiac nails him with a | your take on the BBRR?
front-layout superplex. | MrS: What kind of impression would
Zodiac executes a reverse | I make by winning one of your
neckbreaker. | championships in my very first
The War Machine nails The Reaper | match? Imagine me with that TM
with the Doctor Bomb. | Championship. I think you have a
Mustafa goes for a flying | problem on your hands.
bodypress, but The Reaper counters | DO: What do you think are your
it with a roll away. | chances of winning?
The Reaper goes for a backbreaker, | MrS: heh, is there any doubt?
but Mustafa blocks it. | Confidence. It's all about
Mustafa whips The Reaper into the | confidence. If you don't have the
turnbuckle, but The Reaper | confidence, you don't have too
reverses it. | many breaths to look forward to.
Marc Jasper nails Zodiac with a | [Mr. Shhh puts on his coat and
kick to the head. | raybans.] It's time to pay the
Marc Jasper hits him with the | piper. Now get that camera out of
pillow. | my face before I give you a new
Marc Jasper takes him down with a | asshole. [Mr. Shhh walks past the
kick to the head.] | camera]
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Lethal lets go of Rockin' Rebel after 16 seconds.
Virgo tries to throw Mustafa over the top rope.
He didn't succeed.
Phoenix wraps his barbed-wire whip around Mustafa's neck and pulls him
over the top-rope.]
VM: Phoenix just pulled Mustafa over the top of the rope! Is that
allowed?
[Matt Compton confers with the other referees, and then walks over to
the announcer table.]
RA: Mustafa has been eliminated from the BBRR!
VM: I don't believe they allowed that.
JV: Hey, it's anything goes.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Virgo hits Phoenix with the moon rock.
Phoenix tries to throw Virgo over the top rope.
He didn't succeed.
Phoenix nails him with a DDT.
Phoenix executes the Razzle Dazzle.
Phoenix nails him with a kneebreaker.
Phoenix tries to throw Virgo over the top rope.
RA: Time Warp!!
[Time Warp runs down to the ring carrying a lightning rod.
Time Warp saves Virgo.]
VM: Time Warp caught Virgo and threw him back into the ring!!!
JV: What the hell is that jobber thinking?
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Desperado runs to the ring with a sledgehammer.]
VM: Some strong words there by Desperado.
JV: Desperado lost both times to Aires. Ran him out my ass. It's a
good thing Aires ain't here, cuz he would definitely set him straight.
VM: Wait a minute!! What's this?!?!
[A man from the audience climbs out and slides into the ring.
The man from the audience hits Desperado with a diving full nelson.
The man from the audience leaves the ring.]
VM: A diving full nelson? Only 2 wrestlers use that move. One of them
being Raider and the other....
VM & JV: JESSE AIRES!!!!!!!!!
[Lethal picks up Desperado.
Lethal lifts Desperado over his head and throws him out of the ring.
Desperado has been eliminated.]
RA: Desperado has been eliminated from the BBRR!
VM: Aires has returned and caused Desperado to get thrown out before he
even had a chance to do anything!!
JV: Desperado is going to be pissed!!
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Rockin' Rebel runs into the ropes | DO: Thank you Vance. Pagan, if
Virgo executes an enzuigiri. | you will just give us a few
Time Warp hits Rockin' Rebel with | seconds of your time before the
the lightning rod. | brawl. I think everyone would
Zac goes for a flying forearm, but | like to hear a few answers from
Time Warp counters it with a | your surrounding recent events.
duck-down move. | P:........
Time Warp goes for a short | DO: Um, well, if you don't mind,
clothesline, but Rockin' Rebel | would you care to share a little of
counters it with a duck-down move. | your strategy on tonight's
Cain Steele hits Zac with a | explosive battle with us?
lariat. | P:..........
Zac nails him with an armbar | DO: Oh come on! Don't give me the
submission. | cold shoulder. I want to know
Rockin' Rebel zaps Phoenix with | what's going on! Everyone wants to
the cattle prod. | know what's going on! You're not
Virgo hits Mr. Shhh with the moon | going to just sit there and say
rock. | nothing, are you?
Bones Douglas hits Coldblooded | P:.......
with the motorcycle helmet. | DO: What about Aissa?
Time Warp kicks Zamron the Martian | [Pagan pushes Dean out of the way
Zac lets go of Cain Steele after | and walks off screen.]
35 seconds. | DO: Well I guess Pagan doesn't feel
Zac nails him with a abdominal | like talking. Back to you Vance.
stretch.] |
[End Split Screen]
RA: Here is the final wrestler, Pagan!!
[Pagan hits the ring, carrying a chain.]
VM: And that's the last of the fresh blood. one of the 13 men in the
ring will become our new Tough Man champ.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Pagan goes for a waistlock suplex, but Virgo counters it with an elbowsmash.
Pagan and Zac whip Virgo into the ropes.
They hit Virgo with a double backdrop.
Pagan runs into the ropes.
Virgo nails him with an enzuigiri.
Pagan nails him with a spinebuster slam.
Pagan tries to throw Virgo over the top rope.
Virgo has been eliminated.
Pagan tries to throw Cain Steele over the top rope.
Cain Steele has been eliminated.
Pagan tries to throw Bones Douglas over the top rope.
Bones Douglas has been eliminated.]
VM: Will you look at that?!
JV: Just like I said. Pagan saw that the three men were up against the
ropes and had no trouble throwing them over.
RA: Virgo, Cain Steele, and Bones Douglas have all been eliminated from
the BBRR!!!
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[The Reaper whips Phoenix into the ropes.
The Reaper misses with a clothesline.
Phoenix and The Reaper get hit with a double clothesline.
Phoenix nails him with a powerslam.
Phoenix whips The Reaper into the ropes.
Phoenix executes a dropkick to the knee.
Phoenix executes a DDT.
Lethal hits Phoenix with the SWF Tough Man belt.
Lethal executes a bodyslam.
Time Warp hits Phoenix with the lightning rod.
Phoenix hits Time Warp with the Barbed-wire whip.
Lethal hits Phoenix and Time Warp with a double clothesline.
Phoenix and Time Warp fall out of the ring.
Phoenix has been eliminated.
Time Warp has been eliminated]
RA: Time Warp and Phoenix have been eliminated from the BBRR!
VM: Lethal saw that Phoenix was distracted by Tie Warp and took the
opportunity to eliminate them both.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Rockin' Rebel takes him down with a choke slam.
Rockin' Rebel executes the Head Rocker.
Rockin' Rebel takes him down with a spinebuster slam.
The Reaper nails Rockin' Rebel with the iron claw.
Rockin' Rebel executes a chop.
Rockin' Rebel tries to throw The Reaper over the top rope.
He didn't succeed.]
VM: Rebel just doesn't have the strength. He is exhausted. He's been
in there for over an hour and 15 minutes!
[Rockin' Rebel whips The Reaper into the ropes, but The Reaper reverses it.
The Reaper misses with a kick.
Rockin' Rebel hits The Reaper with a kick.
Rockin' Rebel nails him with a low blow.
Rockin' Rebel goes for a punch, but The Reaper counters it with a punch.
Rockin' Rebel re-reverses it.]
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
[Rockin' Rebel goes for a backspin DDT, but The Reaper counters it with
a belly-to-belly suplex.
The Reaper tries to throw Rockin' Rebel over the top rope.
Rockin' Rebel has been eliminated.]
RA: Rockin' Rebel has been eliminated from the BBRR!!!!!
JV: And it didn't pay off as Reaper was able easily throw Rebel over the
top rope.
VM: Rebel may not have won the belt, but he was in that ring longer than
anyone else. And I'm sure that's something that's gonna help his career
here at SWF.
(quick clip of the SWF logo, then we move ahead in the match.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
JV: Now this is what I don't understand. Reaper has Lethal up on the
turnbuckle. all it takes is one little push and he becomes the new
Tough man Champ. So what does he do? He superplexes him back into the
ring.
VM; Well I'm kinda inclined to believe what you mentioned earlier
Johnny. Reaper is playing with Lethal. He knows that he's going to win
that belt, but he wants to hurt Lethal first.
[The Reaper runs into the ropes.
The Reaper hits Lethal with a shoulderblock.
Lethal whips The Reaper into the ropes.
The Reaper hits Lethal with a kick.
The Reaper runs into the ropes.
The Reaper executes a bearhug.
Lethal breaks the hold after 14 seconds.
Lethal nails him with the SWF Tough Man belt.
Lethal executes a Vader attack.
Lethal executes a thrust kick to the head.
Reaper falls out of the ring.
The Reaper has been eliminated.]
VM: THAT'S IT!!! THAT THRUST KICK SENT REAPER HURTLING OVER THE TOP
ROPE!!!!!
RA: REAPER HAS BEEN ELIMINATED. HERE IS YOUR WINNER, AND NEW SWF TOUGH
MAN CHAMP, LETHAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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(return to a clip of the SWF Birthday Blast logo as we fade out.)
c) 1998 Best of the SWF
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