-------------------------------------------
(A shot of a cheering arena crowd.)
Announcer: Seen live by over a million fans every year.
(A shot of the interior of the SWF broadcast truck.)
Announcer: And by over ten million people a week on television.
(The SWF logo appears on the screen)
Announcer: The Supreme Wrestling Federation.
The S-W-F.
--------------------------------------------
(The theme from "Field of Dreams" plays as we see a still shot from SWF Beach Brawl of
the blubbery Mr. Meteorite #69 lying face first in the sand at the conclusion of the SWF
Toughman Title match. We can hear the announcer's voices.)
VM: Meteorite just collapsed!
JV: I think he passed out from the heat!!
(A still photo of the paramedics kneeling over Mr. Meteorite #69 as the horrified crowd looks
on.)
VM: And Sandman retains the Toughman belt. But our attention is focused
on Mr. Meteorite who is being attended to by the paramedics. We only
hope that he is OK...
(Picture of MM #69 being loaded onto a stretcher.)
JV: I think his weight combined with the strenuous activity and the hot
sun was just too much for him.
(Picture of MM #69 being loaded into an ambulance.)
VM: The paramedics are now loading Meteorite into the ambulance where he
will be taken to a nearby hospital. Hopefully we will be able to tell
you in the next day or two what his condition is. We do hope that he
will be all right.
(Still of a little girl at ringside, wiping a tear from her eye. The footage changes to a shot
of the press tent at Greenville Municipal Stadium, as SWF President Brian Frenck and
Vice-Presidents McNeill and Parker are holding a press conference, standing in front of a
makeshift SWF logo. The caption reads "Earlier Today".)
BF: The SWF would like to thank all of our fans who have sent telegrams, e-mail and phone calls
inquiring about the status of Moon D...Mr. Meteorite #69. Mr. Meteorite is being treated at
Outer Banks Hospital for heat exhaustion and dehydration following his match at SWF Beach Brawl.
Doctors found a slightly irregular heartbeat, and the decision was made to keep him an extra
night for observation. We expect him to be released tomorrow.
In the meantime, we regret to announce that Mr. Meteorite #69 has been pulled from all upcoming
SWF events until our doctors are satisfied that Mr. Meteorite's physical condiiton will permit
him to compete in the SWF.
I'd like to open the floor for questions now. Let's start with Dean Obermann.
Dean: First of all, Brian, congratulations on the success of SWF Beach Brawl.
Brian: Thank you, Dean. For those of you who missed it, the encore presntation of Beach Brawl
will be tomorrow night on pay-per-view.
Dean: Has Moon Do...Mr. Meteorite #69 been fired?
Brian: Absolutely not. He remains under contract to the SWF, and we look forward to having him
back as soon as possible. Chip?
Chip: Can you tell us what was responsible for Mr. Meteroite's condition?
Brian: Our doctors inform us that Mr. Meteorite apparently had gained almost 50 pounds over the
past month. It is believed that this, combined with the stress of the match against Sandman,
caused him to pass out. Yes, Vance?
Vance: There are reports in the local paper that Mr. Meteorite's dehydration was caused by the
vast amounts of alcohol that he had been consuming recently. Any truth to...
Brian: I have no knowledge of that. I can tell you that Mr. Meteorite #69 will not be able to
wrestle in the Supreme Wrestling Federation again until our doctors have confirmed that he is
once again in the proper physical condition. We will make sure that he has the best medical
facilities available to him.
Vance: How long will he be off the road?
Brian: I would not expect to see Mr. Meteorite wrestling in the SWF for at least 60 days. Thank
you, gentlemen.
(Brian Frenck leaves the podium as reporters shout questions at him.)
Chip: Triumphant Tuesday is NEXT!
---------------------------------------------
(An overhead shot of a wrestling ring in the middle of a vacant parking lot in a big city.
Night time. The opening bars of "The Extremist" by Joe Satriani play as we see shadowy figures
approach the ring from all sides. There is an explosion, near the ring, increasing the amount
of available light...
And we see the faces of the wrestlers. Jagged Edge and Shae Smith approach the ring as we
see an image of Edge executing the Shattered Dreams on Carey Stone projected on the building
behind him. Doug Bacon wanders in through the parked cars, as Paul von Braun runs alongside him,
holding a case of beer. We see an image of Bacon executing the Fried Bacon on Eric Wright
projected on the building behind him.
Sandman walks in, waving his pitchfork and accompanied by Michelle. We see a shot of Sandman
knocking Lethal off the ladder projected on the building next to him. We see Pagan, surrounded
by candles, in a nearby alley. We see an image of Pagan hitting the Final Judgment on Mustafa
projected on the wall above him.
A shot of the ground near the ring. The Living Dead emerge through the soil, as a shot of
them hitting the Autopsy on the Westside Ridas is projected on the ground next to them. We see
Rock 'n Roll Animal standing atop a building, as an image of the Animal hitting a frog splash on
Sean Slade plays beneath him.
An ice cream truck pulls up and God's Tears emerges from the back, as a shot of GT applying
the Hurt on Death Angel is projected on the side of the truck. A stretch limo pulls right up
to ringside. We look in the back and see Mr. Shhh and the Men in Black watching a videotape of
Shhh hitting the Peacemaker on Akira the Samurai.
Cut to an overhead shot of the ring, with the SWF wrestlers approaching from all sides. As
they are all about to enter, we see a burst of fireworks, then the Triumphant Tuesday logo,
followed by another burst of fireworks, which dissolves to...)
------------------------------------------------
(The inside of a packed stadium. There are screaming fans and fireworks going off around the
ring and along the rampway. The graphic reads:
"LIVE! Greenville Municipal Stadium
Greenville, South Carolina".
The camera pans the crowd, lingering on some of the unique signs there: "I read ProNews1!" "Bacon
got screwed", "Chico + Cholo = Champs!", "Biggie: It was Hammer Time!", "We love Lady Jezebel!"
"Bring back Billy Jo Taylor!", and three guys dressed in Greenville Braves jerseys with a huge banner saying "The REAL Trinity is back!".)
Chip: Welcome, everyone, to Greenville, South Carolina!
(Shots of a bouncy young woman in a Fatal Fury T-shirt.)
Chip: Welcome to Greenville Municipal Stadium!
(Shot of SWF suits Brian Frenck, Pat McNeill and Tim Parker who are sitting in the front row.
Frenck and Parker are wearing red, white and blue SWF Independence Day T-shirts. McNeill is
wearing a red Washington Capitals T-shirt and appears to be watching a little TV. Three SWF
security guards are seated next to Frenck.)
Chip: Welcome to Triumphant Tuesday!
(The angle pans down to the announce desk, where we see Chip Collins, wearing an SWF blazer and
a red power tie, next to "The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen, wearing a Denver Broncos cap
and a T-shirt that reads "Super Bowl Champions: Who's Next?".)
Chip: I'm Chip Collins, along with the man wrestling fans love to love...
Fool: ..."The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen!
Chip: What an incredible 48 Hours it's been in the SWF. And it's not over yet.
Fool: We got three new champions, three departures and a one-way trip to the fat farm.
(We see Sven "The Icepick" Pieterson standing in the ring, looking down the aisle.)
Chip: There's a lot to get you caught up, fans, and we'll take care of that as we go. Our main
event tonight features two members of the SOB's against two members of the MIA's. But which two?
Fool: Well, Chip, it looks like El Cholo and Tom Pho for the MIA's, against Gods Tears and Doug
Bacon of the SOB's. Ouch.
Chip: Our new SWF Television Champion, The Artful Dodger, gets thrown right into the fire as he
defends against Axel "The Hammer" Mate!
Fool: I knew Dodger could do it. Score one for the short people!
Chip: Texas Pete's mystery guest is the NEW SWF American Champion, Pagan, and we'll see Hexx
battle a wrestler that Pagan selects.
Fool: If Pagan comes out with his face painted red and black, I'm leaving.
Chip: For those of you who are wondering what Sven Pieterson is doing in the ring, he came out
here a few minutes ago and announced that he wasn't leaving until he got a match with Tanner
Boyle.
Fool: So what? Tell them about Trinity!
Chip: And, yes, we will see Hot Shot Donovan and the new Trinity member in tag team action. We
believe the new Trinity member's name is Kaos!
Fool: Alright, now let's see what's up with Fjord Boy.
Chip: Tanner Boyle was originally set to face a mystery wrestler, who is actually Duke Diamond. But
Sven has said he will not leave the ring until he gets this match!
Fool: Well, here comes Da Tanner.
(Tanner Boyle is emerging from the first base dugout and making his way down the aisle. "Bulls
On Parade" by Rage Against The Machine starts to play.]
Chip: Let's go up to the ring and Jeff Ayres!
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, our opening contest tonight is set for one fall, with a 30 minute
time limit. Introducing first, from, New Orleans, Louisiana, weighing in at 285 pounds, here is
Tanner Boyle!!
[The crowd is cheering Boyle on. Tanner stops in the aisle and
makes an X with his arms and screams as several fireworks are launched
behind him. He then runs down the aisle and slides into the ring.]
Jeff: And his opponent, currently in the ring, accompanied by Helga and weighing in at
305 pounds. From Stockholm, Sweden... Sven "Ice Pick" Pieterson!
[Sven holds up the Swedish flag as the crowd cheers.]
Chip: So we WILL see Tanner Boyle against Sven Pieterson.
Fool: Be still my heart.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Tanner Boyle goes for a bearhug, but Sven Pieterson counters it with a punch.
Sven Pieterson uses an inverted atomic drop on Tanner Boyle.
Sven Pieterson is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Sven Pieterson takes Tanner Boyle down with a power bomb.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: A quick two count here by Sven Pieterson. What an evening we had at Beach Brawl.
Fool: I had a great time.
(There are lots of chants for Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson claps.
There are lots of chants for Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson hits a German suplex on Tanner Boyle.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Chris Carroll is your referee and Sven Pieterson has taken over here. Sven lost a tough
match Sunday night to Sean McKenzie.
Fool: At least Sean's wearing pants now.
(Sven Pieterson hits Tanner Boyle with a front-layout suplex.
The crowd is behind Sven Pieterson all the way.
Sven Pieterson executes a fallaway slam on Tanner Boyle.
Sven Pieterson is going for the pin.
Chris Carroll counts: One, kickout.
Sven Pieterson whips Tanner Boyle into the ropes, but Tanner Boyle reverses it.
Sven Pieterson hits Tanner Boyle with a belly-to-belly suplex.
Sven Pieterson whips Tanner Boyle into the turnbuckle, but Tanner Boyle
reverses it.
Sven Pieterson bumps into Chris Carroll.
Tanner Boyle runs shoulder-first into the corner, but Sven Pieterson
moves out of the way.)
Chip: At Beach Brawl, we saw the unveiling of the other two members of the MIA's, Jagged Edge
and Fatal Fury.
Fool: Yeah. Jagged Edge is the MIA leader. Who knew?
(The crowd is on its feet cheering for Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson takes Tanner Boyle down with a bodyslam.
Sven Pieterson goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle locks Sven Pieterson in a double chickenwing submission.
There is no referee there to ask Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson is valiantly trying to break the hold.
Chris Carroll is back on the job.
Sven Pieterson reaches the ropes after being trapped for 15 seconds.)
Chip: Sven finally breaks out of the double chickenwing! The Kold Blooded Killaz defeated
Endless Fury to capture the SWF Tag Team Titles.
Fool: I see Chico and El Cholo holding those belts for a long time.
(Tanner Boyle runs into the ropes.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a kick.
Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the turnbuckle.
Tanner Boyle runs shoulder-first into the corner.
Tanner Boyle goes for a short clothesline, but Sven Pieterson counters it with
a duck-down move.
Sven Pieterson kicks Tanner Boyle.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Sven Pieterson hits Tanner Boyle.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Sven Pieterson.)
Chip: As The Fool mentioned, Artful Dodger is your new SWF Television Champion.
Fool: Hoo-wah! And Headhunter and his brother ran away.
Chip: They did not! The Original Gangsta and Headhunter will return to SWF action late this
summer.
(Sven Pieterson hits Tanner Boyle.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Sven Pieterson goes for a bridging back suplex, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with a headlock takedown.
Tanner Boyle goes for a forearm smash, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.
Sven Pieterson goes for a lariat, but Tanner Boyle counters it with
an armbar submission.
Sven Pieterson reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Sven Pieterson goes for a fisherman suplex, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle goes for a forearm smash, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.)
Chip: Good counter wrestling by both these men. We also saw Pagan defeat Gods Tears to become
the first two-time American Champion in SWF history.
Fool: Generally not a good night for ol' GT.
(Sven Pieterson goes for a bridging back suplex, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle goes for a backbreaker, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.
Sven Pieterson runs into the ropes.
Sven Pieterson hits a Gorilla Press on Tanner Boyle.
Sven Pieterson uses a bodyslam on Tanner Boyle.
Sven Pieterson goes for a bridging back suplex, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with a headlock takedown.
Tanner Boyle nails Sven Pieterson with a back suplex.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a dropkick.
Tanner Boyle takes Sven Pieterson down with a forearm smash.
Tanner Boyle screams.)
Fool: Why's he screaming at us?
Chip: I have no idea. The SWF World Title match ended in controversial fashion, as Gods Tears
knocked out referee Ryan Wilson with a steel chair. The match was ruled a no contest.
(There are lots of chants for Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle gets a sleeperhold on Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson is struggling to reach the ropes.
Sven Pieterson reaches the ropes after being trapped for 11 seconds.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Fool: Nice sleeper by Tanner. Go on. Tell them the rest.
(Sven Pieterson goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Tanner Boyle counters it with
a backdrop.
Tanner Boyle is going for the pin.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: A near fall there by Tanner. The biggest surprise of the night had to be when Mr. Shhh,
Sandman and Pagan united to attack Doug Bacon and Gods Tears. And this appears to be a
permanent arrangement.
Fool: Yeah. How about GT costing Bacon the title match like that?
(Tanner Boyle uses a chop on Sven Pieterson.
Tanner Boyle throws Sven Pieterson out of the ring.
Chris Carroll counts: one, two, three, four, Sven Pieterson reenters the ring.
Tanner Boyle throws Sven Pieterson out of the ring.
Tanner Boyle goes through the ropes.
The crowd is really behind Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the guardrail.
Tanner Boyle goes for a backbreaker, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.)
Chip: I don't know if what Gods Tears did was designed to help Doug Bacon or hurt him.
Meanwhile, Tanner and Sven have taken this fight to the floor!
Fool: I'm not rooting for anybody, am I?
(Chris Carroll counts: 1.
Sven Pieterson knocks Tanner Boyle into the ringsteps.
Chris Carroll counts: 2.
Sven Pieterson hits a lariat on Tanner Boyle.
Sven Pieterson executes a vertical suplex on Tanner Boyle.
Chris Carroll counts: 3.
Sven Pieterson whips Tanner Boyle into the guardrail.
Chris Carroll counts: 4.
Chris Carroll counts: 5.)
Chip: Both wrestlers need to watch the count here on a beautiful night in the Upstate of South
Carolina.
Fool: We're here on the infield of the baseball stadium, and they're brawling in the dirt.
(Sven Pieterson whips Tanner Boyle into the guardrail.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Chris Carroll counts: 6.
Sven Pieterson whips Tanner Boyle into the guardrail.
Chris Carroll counts: 7.
Chris Carroll counts: 8.
Sven Pieterson reenters the ring.
Tanner Boyle follows him back in.)
Chip: Both wrestlers barely beat the count in.
Fool: These two don't know how to count past five, so they weren't taking any chances.
(Sven Pieterson goes for a front-layout suplex, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle executes a jawbreaker on Sven Pieterson.
There are lots of chants for Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle takes Sven Pieterson down with a stomachbreaker.
Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the ropes.
Sven Pieterson takes Tanner Boyle down with a takeover suplex.
Tanner Boyle runs into the ropes.
Tanner Boyle misses with an elbow.)
Chip: Now, so far today, we have learned that Captain Canuck is going back to his old
federation, that Mr. Meteorite has left to go get back in shape, and that Original Gangsta and
Headhunter are off to teach wrestling camp.
Fool: That's right. And, over on "General Hospital", Laura's cheating on Luke.
(Tanner Boyle misses with an elbow.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a backdrop.
Tanner Boyle throws Sven Pieterson out of the ring.
Chris Carroll counts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
Sven Pieterson reenters the ring.
Tanner Boyle nails Sven Pieterson with a dropkick.
Tanner Boyle screams.
The crowd is going crazy.)
Fool: Those screams helped a lot when Ricky Watts had him in The Joker's Wild.
Chip: Stop. The fans like Tanner. Leave him alone.
(Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the turnbuckle.
Sven Pieterson comes back and rocks Tanner Boyle with an elbow.
Sven Pieterson goes for a Soviet suplex, but Tanner Boyle counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Tanner Boyle uses a low blow on Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson goes for a DDT, but Tanner Boyle counters it with a low blow.
Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the ropes, but Sven Pieterson
reverses it.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a kick.
Tanner Boyle locks Sven Pieterson in a double chickenwing submission.)
Chip: Another double chickenwing by Tanner.
Fool: Great. Anything to move things along.
(Sven Pieterson reaches the ropes after being trapped for 8 seconds.
Tanner Boyle goes for a bearhug, but Sven Pieterson counters it with a punch.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a dropkick.
Tanner Boyle hits a chop on Sven Pieterson.
Tanner Boyle nails Sven Pieterson with a roundhouse right.)
Jeff: 10 minutes gone by. There are 20 minutes remaining.
Chip: What intensity we're seeing here in our opener.
Fool: Come on, Dodger's partner!
(Tanner Boyle whips Sven Pieterson into the ropes.
Tanner Boyle misses with a kick.
Sven Pieterson goes for a lariat, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle takes Sven Pieterson down with a short clothesline.
Tanner Boyle nails Sven Pieterson with a hiptoss.
Tanner Boyle nails Sven Pieterson with a low blow.)
Chip: Oh! Low blow by Tanner!
Fool: I haven't seen a move like that since...Brian McKay! Hoo-wah!
(Tanner Boyle executes a short clothesline on Sven Pieterson.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a hiptoss.
Tanner Boyle hits Sven Pieterson with a stomachbreaker.
Tanner Boyle has the crowd going wild.
Tanner Boyle is going for the pin.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, three.
There are lots of chants for Tanner Boyle.)
Chip: Yes! Tanner Boyle gets him with the stomachbreaker!
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 10:34, Tanner Boyle!
(We see a man racing out of the dugout toward the ring as "Bulls on Parade" plays.)
Chip: A tremendous win by Tanner Boyle, as you see him celebrating in...LOOK OUT!
[ Ricky Watts jumps Tanner Boyle from the back.]
Chip: It's Ricky Watts. "Wild Card: Ricky Watts attacks from behind! Tanner never saw him!
Fool: Business is picking up! I love this job!
[ As Tanner goes down in pain, Ricky goes to the outside, and throws in a chair.]
Chip: Sven Pieterson has left the ring. What is Watts doing with that chair?
[ Ricky jumps back in the ring, and starts to stomp on Tanner. Ricky hooks
Boyle's ankle up with a chair as if he was going to break it. Ricky
goes to the top and stomps on top of the chair while Tanner screams in
pain.]
Chip: He tried to smash Boyle's ankle! He went up top and stomped on the chair!
Fool: I like it! When do I get my Ricky Watts T-shirt?
[Ricky pulls the chair off the man's ankle while setting up for the Joker's Wild. Referee Chris
Carroll tries to stop him as SWF security tries to stop him.]
Chip: The Joker's Wild! He's goingf for the Joker's Wild on Tanner!
Fool: Don't worry, Chip. They have some lovely parting gifts backstage for Tanner.
[Watts gets the hold on, while Chris Carroll tries to pull him off. He refuses to
break it.]
Chip: Tanner Boyle may have a severely injured ankle!
[After security tries to pull Watts off of Tanner, Watts lets go. He heads to the back as the
crowd boos.]
Chip: An unprovoked attack by Ricky Watts! And the crowd has turned on "The Wildcard"!
Fool: For getting your ass kicked on "The Joker's Wild", Tanner, you get a free supply of Turtle
Wax! Perfect for when you've just got your ass waxed!
[ The security guards try to help Tanner to his feet. He is having obviously difficulty putting
weight on his left ankle. ]
Chip: Tanner Boyle is your winner. Fans, when we return, we'll see Hexx against a member of
Pagan's Flock. Don't you go away!
--------------------------------------
(commercial for Beach Brawl encore presentation.)
(The Beach Brawl logo and ordering information appears on the screen.)
---------------------------------------
Chip: We're back in Greenville, South Carolina, at Municipal Stadium, with more of SWF
Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: More beatings per hour than any other wrestling show.
Chip: It was sunny and 83 here today. But now it's dark, and about to get darker, as Hexx
battles a member of Pagan's Flock. Let's take it up to Jeff Ayres.
Jeff: Introducing first, from Louisiana, weighing in at 381 pounds, here is HEXX!
["Born On The Bayou" by CCR blares as Hexx makes his way to the ring. Gold fireworks go off and
gold lights flash. The crowd boos loudly.]
Chip: Well, there is the big man in the Jack Daniels T-shirt. And you have towonder what Pagan
has up his sleeve.
Fool: It could be Mr. Shhh. It could be Sandman, or Biggie Z, or Brian Christian. We don't
know!
("Death Wish" by Christian Death plays as Pagan makes his way to ringside.)
Chip: There is the new SWF American Champion. And, not to be cointentious, Sportin' Fool, but
I don't believe that Pagan's Flock is in the building tonight.
(Pagan grabs the announcer's microphone at ringside.)
Pagan: You threw away any respect that you had left when you returned
to the SWF, and then you sealed your fate when you came to the
conclusion that you were man enough to step into the ring with me. Now,
Hexx, I introduce to you the chosen follower of mine that will make you
wish that you had never uttered the name Pagan.
(The lights dim in the arena as a spotlight hits the entranceway.)
Fool: I wonder who this is?
Pagan: Bring out Gods Tears.
Chip: What?
(The crowd anxiously awaits the emergence of GT through the curtains,
but he does not appear. The lights return shortly, and a SWF official
runs out to ringside and begins to speak with Jeff Ayres.)
Pagan: I said to get Gods Tears out here!
Fool: Why would GT help Pagan?
(Pat McNeill motions for Jeff Ayres to come over. After speaking to him
for a minute, the ring announcer takes a microphone.)
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, I have been informed
that Gods Tears refuses to compete tonight against Hexx. Therefore,
Pagan will be given a ten count to bring out a suitable replacement or
else this match will be forfeited to Hexx.
(Pagan looks around the arena in shock. The crowd stand on their feet
cheering.)
Chip: That's more like it!
Pagan: You can't do this to me!
Referee Chad Bray begins his count. The crowd is chanting along.
Crowd: One! Two! Three! Four!...
Chip: Who's going to bail Pagan out now?
Pagan: STORM! Bring me Storm!
(The crowd boos loudly as David Storm enters from the dugout and
makes his way to the ring. He jumps over the top rope and into the
ring.)
Fool: Well, David Storm is here, Chip.
(McNeill once again speaks to Jeff Ayres.)
Chip: I don't think Storm is allowed to wrestle! Remember that "Loser Leaves the SWF" match?
Jeff: Fans, I once again have been informed that Pagan's choice may not
compete against Hexx tonight. David Storm is not an employee of the
Supreme Wrestling Federation therefore his participation in this event
is invalid.
(The crowd again bursts into cheers. Pagan tosses the microphone down
to the mat, grabs David Storm and executes a DDT.)
Chip: My goodness! Pagan just attacked David Storm!
(Pagan lifts Storm up by the hair and tosses him over the top rope before again picking up the
microphone and looking into the laughing face of Hexx.)
Pagan: You win. This week on Slaughterhouse, you want me? You've got
me. Falls count anywhere in the arena... no disqualifications... no
countouts.
(The crowd cheers.)
Chip: Hexx will get his shot at Pagan!
Pagan: And you don't even have to win... because if you can walk
out of the arena on your on two feet after I have raped your mind, body,
and soul... I'll give you a gift beyond your wildest fantasies. You will get
a shot at my American Title.
(Pagan drops the microphone... grabs Storm... and they leave the ring area.)
Fool: Looks like Pagan will defend the title against Hexx!
Chip: It sure does. We're going to go on to our next match, since the last one never happened.
Hold on, fans, let's go to our camera in the back!
(The camera opens with a shot of Madness and Crazygirl. They are talking with Mr. Jones and
Mr. Smith, the bodyguards of Mr. Shhh.)
Fool: What could the Men in Black want with those two losers?
Chip: Madness is set to face Trinity next in tag team action.
(Mr. Jones takes out an envelope and hands it to Crazygirl. She smiles. Mr. Smith motions off
camera. Two smiling young ladies appear and walk off with Insnaity and Madman.)
Fool: That's interesting.
Chip: Wahtever's about to happen, it can't be good news for Trinity. Let's go to the ring!
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall with a 30 minute time
limit!
(Mr. Jones emerges from the dugout and motions to Jeff Ayres.)
Chip: Now what?
(Mr. Jones talks to Jeff Ayres. We see money change hands. Mr. Jones leaves the ring and goes
over to where Frenck and McNeill are sitting. He talks with them. They shrug, and motion for
Jeff Ayres to continue.)
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, we have a substitution in our next match. The team of Madness will
not be competing tonight!
(Obviously, the crowd cheers this news.)
Fool: Oh, no.
("Another Body Murdered" by Faith No More and Boo Yaa T.R.I.B.E. begins to play.)
Jeff: Introducing first...
(Mr. Shhh and Pagan emerge from the dugout to a roar from the crowd.)
Chip: Shhh and Pagan! They're going to fight Trinity!
Jeff: ...the SWF American Champion, PAGAN! And his partner, the SWF World Champion, MR. SHHH!
(The crowd gives a mixed, but excited reaction as the two men make their way to the ring.
Fool: Well, I have to admit, I like Pagan's style.
Chip: But you're part of Trinity.
Jeff: And their opponents...
(There is a loud explosion of fireworks, and the wall monitor
begins flashing images of Trinity members, and the words 'CHAOS', 'TERROR', and
'TRINITY' are intermixed with them, as sinister laughter breaks out over the PA
system, followed by 'Bullet The Blue Sky' by U2.)
Jeff: ...accompanied to the ring by Trisha Deneke, at a total combined weight of 497 pounds,
the team of Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan...TRINITY!
(Kaos and Hot Shot make their way to the ring, along with Trisha.)
Chip: Well, this'll be our first look at the newcomer, Kaos. And what a welcome this will be
for him.
Fool: I don't know. This looks like a setup to me.
Chip: Chad Bray is your referee. It's Mr. Shhh and Pagan against Trinity, and we're set to go!
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Hot Shot Donovan executes an enzuigiri on Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan takes Mr. Shhh down with a forearm to the back.
Hot Shot Donovan hits Mr. Shhh with a tiger suplex.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Hot Shot Donovan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Chip: Opening moments of the match, and Donovan with a near fall. So, were you thinking of
jumping ship and joining Mr. Shhh, Sandman and Pagan?
Fool: Well, they are original Trinity members.
(Hot Shot Donovan climbs to the second rope and flexes to the crowd.
Hot Shot Donovan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a savate kick, but Mr. Shhh counters it with
a duck-down move.
Mr. Shhh hits a dropkick to the knee on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh executes a dropkick to the knee on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh tags out to Pagan.
Pagan and Mr. Shhh hit Hot Shot Donovan with a double flying axhandle.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.
Pagan takes Hot Shot Donovan down with a swinging punch.)
Chip: Pagan tags in. What made him think that Gods Tears would fight on his behalf?
Fool: I don't know. I think Pagan is trying to make it look like Gods Tears double-crossed Doug
Bacon.
Chip: I think it's possible that he did doublecross Bacon.
(Pagan goes for a Tombstone, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a backbreaker on Pagan.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a kneelift, but Pagan counters it with a side step.
Pagan attemps to place Hot Shot Donovan on the turnbuckle, but Hot Shot Donovan
blocks it.
Pagan hits Hot Shot Donovan with a German suplex.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: German suplex and a near fall by Pagan. What's on the Hotline, Fool?
Fool: 1-900-SWF-NEWS. Fool's Gold tonight on the SWF Hotline. I'll have the latest on Doug
Bacon's petition for a rematch with Mr. Shhh. plus the possibility of a huge cagematch at
Independence Day. $1.99 a minute, and if you listen for 20 minutes in a row, you get your 21st
minute free!
(Pagan gets a grapevine on Hot Shot Donovan.
Hot Shot Donovan reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Pagan goes for a vertical suplex, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan tags out to Kaos.
Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan whip Pagan into the ropes.
They hit Pagan with a double kick to the midsection.
Hot Shot Donovan leaves the ring.
Kaos executes a dragon suplex on Pagan.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is cheering on Kaos.)
Chip: Dragon suplex by Kaos, and he's off to a good start.
Fool: Looks like he fits right in.
(Kaos uses an atomic drop on Pagan.
Kaos goes for a Frankensteiner from the top rope, but Pagan counters it with
a side step.
Pagan goes for a camel clutch, but Kaos blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan hit Pagan with a double enzuigiri.
Hot Shot Donovan leaves the ring.
Pagan uses a vertical suplex on Kaos.
Pagan tags out to Mr. Shhh.
Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
Kaos takes Mr. Shhh down with a dropkick.)
Chip: Kaos goes to work on the world champion. Fans, our next pay-per-view is SWF Independence
Day. It will be live from the Fleet Center in Boston, Massachusetts on Saturday night, July
4th. Tickets will go on sale this Friday morning at 10 AM
Fool: And if you get there before noon, you can meet Sound & Fury. Whoop dee damn do.
(Mr. Shhh uses a low blow on Kaos.
Pagan enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Mr. Shhh and Pagan whip Kaos into the ropes.
They hit Kaos with a double kick to the midsection.
Pagan hits Kaos with a spinning DDT.
Mr. Shhh and Pagan hit Kaos with a double flying axhandle.
Pagan uses a swinging neckbreaker on Kaos.
There's a small reaction to Pagan.
Mr. Shhh takes Kaos down with a flying elbowdrop.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Nice double team move by Pagan and Mr. Shhh. So what's the deal, Fool? Will Bacon get
his rematch?
Fool: I don't know. But I wouldn't be surprised.
(Mr. Shhh complains about a slow count.
The crowd is responding to Kaos.
Pagan leaves the ring.
Kaos takes Mr. Shhh down with an inside cradle.
Kaos pulls the tights.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Kaos nearly steals one right there!
Fool: I like this guy. He cheats!
(Kaos tags out to Hot Shot Donovan.
Hot Shot Donovan whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh hits Hot Shot Donovan with a clothesline.
Mr. Shhh catches Hot Shot Donovan in an armlock hammerlock submission.
Hot Shot Donovan reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Mr. Shhh hits a fist to the midsection on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh whips Hot Shot Donovan into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh misses with a kick.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a kick to the thigh, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh goes for a crotch slam, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with
a facerake.)
Chip: Rake of the face by Donovan. Don't forget that up next, Pagan talks to Texas Pete.
Fool: This could be fun.
(Hot Shot Donovan kicks Mr. Shhh.
Mr. Shhh hits Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh hits Hot Shot Donovan.
A few fans are cheering on Mr. Shhh.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: Mr. Shhh back on the attack. So, Fool, are you going to defect and go with the
frontrunners?
(Mr. Shhh hits Hot Shot Donovan.
A few fans are cheering on Mr. Shhh.
Mr. Shhh uses a Tombstone on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh nails Hot Shot Donovan with a flying elbowdrop.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Mr. Shhh is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Fool: That was close. I'll tell you what. If Mr. Shhh and Pagan win, I'll think about it.
Chip: Mr. Shhh with the sleeper.
(Mr. Shhh puts Hot Shot Donovan in a sleeperhold.
Hot Shot Donovan is valiantly trying to break the hold.
Hot Shot Donovan breaks the hold with a jawbreaker after 6 seconds.
Hot Shot Donovan takes Mr. Shhh down with a vertical suplex.
Hot Shot Donovan chops Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan hits Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan hits a kick to the midsection on Mr. Shhh.
Kaos enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Hot Shot Donovan and Kaos hit Mr. Shhh with a double dropkick.
Hot Shot Donovan and Kaos whip Mr. Shhh into the ropes.)
Chip: Some nice double teaming here from the new Trinity.
Fool: I think this new member is going to help.
(They hit Mr. Shhh with a double fist to the midsection.
Kaos leaves the ring.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a chop on Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a forearm to the back on Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan uses a jawbreaker on Mr. Shhh.
Hot Shot Donovan takes Mr. Shhh down with a jawbreaker.
Hot Shot Donovan hits a vertical suplex on Mr. Shhh.
Sven Pieterson and The Artful Dodger come to ringside.)
Chip: Uh-oh! We've got company!
Fool: The Dodger and Sven are here! This is good!
(Hot Shot Donovan whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a kick to the midsection, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
Hot Shot Donovan misses with a kick.
Mr. Shhh hits a clothesline on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh tags out to Pagan.
Pagan and Mr. Shhh whip Hot Shot Donovan into the ropes.
They attempt to hit Hot Shot Donovan with a double elbowsmash, but he counters
it with a duck-down move.
Hot Shot Donovan hits them with a double clothesline.
The crowd is going crazy.)
Chip: Double clothesline by Donovan!
Fool: Not that I'm not happy to see Sven and Dodger, but why are they here?
(Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.
Hot Shot Donovan nails Pagan with a kick to the midsection.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a vertical suplex, but Pagan blocks it.
Mr. Shhh enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Mr. Shhh executes a Tombstone on Hot Shot Donovan.
There are lots of chants for Mr. Shhh.
Pagan attemps to place Hot Shot Donovan on the turnbuckle, but Hot Shot Donovan
blocks it.
Pagan goes for the Final Judgement, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with
a front-layout superplex.)
Chip: Great counter by Donovan!
Fool: He's got Pagan in trouble.
(Kaos enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Kaos goes for a back suplex, but Pagan counters it with a cross-body block.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Kaos leaves the ring.)
Chip: Kaos tried to double team and nearly got pinned.
(Mr. Shhh whips Kaos into the turnbuckle, but Kaos reverses it.
Kaos runs shoulder-first into the corner.
Kaos whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Kaos executes an enzuigiri on Mr. Shhh.
Mr. Shhh goes for a Tombstone, but Kaos blocks it.
Kaos goes for a Russian legsweep, but Mr. Shhh counters it with an elbowsmash.
Pagan enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Mr. Shhh and Pagan whip Kaos into the ropes.
They hit Kaos with a double elbowsmash.
Pagan leaves the ring.)
Chip: You can tell that Pagan and Mr. Shhh are out to destroy Trinity.
Fool: Well, Equalizer's gone, but they want a piece of Donovan, the Dead and this Kaos.
(Mr. Shhh runs into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh goes for a jumping DDT, but Kaos counters it with a backdrop.
Kaos tags out to Hot Shot Donovan.
Kaos uses an enzuigiri to the face on Mr. Shhh.
The crowd is responding to Kaos.
Hot Shot Donovan nails Mr. Shhh with a flying dropkick.
Hot Shot Donovan and Kaos hit Mr. Shhh with a double back suplex.
Kaos leaves the ring.
Hot Shot Donovan hits Mr. Shhh with a brain buster.
The chants for Hot Shot Donovan are deafening.)
Chip: Donovan has a history with the World Champ.
Fool: You have to hand it to Donovan. He kept Trinity together single-handed for a while.
(Hot Shot Donovan uses a jawbreaker on Mr. Shhh.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Mr. Shhh blocks it.
Mr. Shhh goes for a double underhook piledriver, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan nails Mr. Shhh with a tiger suplex.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Hot Shot Donovan complains about a slow count.
Mr. Shhh hits Hot Shot Donovan with an inside cradle.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Very sneaky! A pair of near falls there.
Fool: Mr. Shhh with the waistlock...
(Mr. Shhh executes a German suplex on Hot Shot Donovan.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is going crazy.)
Chip: A near fall by Mr. Shhh!
Fool: Donovan beat Mr. Shhh back at Valentine's Day Massacre for the American Title, and he
still feels it.
(Mr. Shhh uses a low blow on Hot Shot Donovan.
Mr. Shhh goes for a Tombstone, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a knee to the back on Mr. Shhh.
Kaos enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Pagan enters the ring and throws Kaos out of the ring.
The crowd is cheering on Pagan.
Pagan nails Hot Shot Donovan with a waistlock suplex.)
Jeff: 10 minutes gone by. There are 20 minutes remaining.
Chip: I still don't know what Sven and Artful Dodger are doing here.
(Mr. Shhh executes a flying elbowdrop on Hot Shot Donovan.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
The chants for Mr. Shhh are deafening.)
Fool: Pagan and Mr. Shhh are clearing the ring.
(Pagan leaves the ring.
Mr. Shhh takes Hot Shot Donovan down with a bodyslam.
Mr. Shhh goes for a bodyslam, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Hot Shot Donovan whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Hot Shot Donovan misses with a shoulderblock.
Mr. Shhh nails Hot Shot Donovan with a jumping DDT.
Mr. Shhh hits a flying elbowdrop on Hot Shot Donovan.
Chad Bray counts: One, shoulder up.
The crowd is behind Mr. Shhh all the way.
Pagan enters the ring to make it two-on-one.)
Chip: Double team maneuver on the way.
Fool: Come on, Kaos! Get in there!
(Mr. Shhh and Pagan hit Hot Shot Donovan with a double flying axhandle.
Pagan leaves the ring.
Mr. Shhh goes for a kneebreaker, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Hot Shot Donovan throws Mr. Shhh out of the ring.
Chad Bray counts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, Mr. Shhh
reenters the ring.
Hot Shot Donovan tags out to Kaos.
Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan whip Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
They hit Mr. Shhh with a double clothesline.
Hot Shot Donovan leaves the ring.
Kaos executes an enzuigiri on Mr. Shhh.)
Chip: Kaos may be a newcomer, but he's wrestling like a veteran.
Fool: Yeah. You'd think he'd be intimidated, stepping in against the World Champ.
(Kaos hits Mr. Shhh with a back suplex.
Kaos hits Mr. Shhh with an enzuigiri.
The crowd is cheering on Kaos.
Kaos whips Mr. Shhh into the ropes.
Mr. Shhh executes a dropkick to the knee on Kaos.
Mr. Shhh goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Kaos counters it with a side step.
Kaos takes Mr. Shhh down with a faceslam.
Kaos is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Kaos complains about a slow count.)
Chip: Kaos better look behind him!
(Mr. Shhh uses an inside cradle on Kaos.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Fool: That was close. This guy has to learn to keep an eye on Shhh.
Chip: That should be a prerequisite for entering Trinity.
(Mr. Shhh tags out to Pagan.
Mr. Shhh hits a jumping DDT on Kaos.
The crowd is behind Mr. Shhh all the way.
Pagan hits a spinning DDT on Kaos.
Pagan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Hot Shot Donovan enters the ring, but gets cut off.
Pagan and Mr. Shhh whip Kaos into the ropes.
They attempt to hit Kaos with a double elbowsmash, but he counters it with a
duck-down move.
Kaos hits them with a double clothesline.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.)
Chip: Another big double clothesline.
Fool: This Kaos is only about 260 pounds, but he's still the biggest guy in
the match.
(Kaos whips Pagan into the ropes.
Pagan takes Kaos down with a Japanese armdrag takedown.
Mr. Shhh enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Mr. Shhh hits Kaos with a thrust kick to the head.
The crowd is behind Mr. Shhh all the way.
Pagan uses a German suplex on Kaos.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Pagan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Chip: Another near fall as Pagan hits that German suplex.
Fool: These four are putting on a show for the ol' Fool.
(Pagan and Mr. Shhh whip Kaos into the ropes.
They hit Kaos with a double backdrop.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.
Pagan goes for a figure-four leglock, but Kaos counters it with a small package.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: That time it's Kaos with the rollup.
(Kaos nails Pagan with a faceslam.
Kaos is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Kaos goes for a backbreaker, but Pagan counters it with a facerake.
Pagan nails Kaos with a spinebuster slam.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Pagan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Chip: Spinebuster! Kaos is in trouble here.
Fool: Pagan and Mr. Shhh have had the better teamwork these past few minutes.
(Pagan goes for a swinging punch, but Kaos blocks it.
Kaos goes for a hiptoss, but Pagan counters it with a facerake.
Mr. Shhh enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Mr. Shhh goes for a thrust kick to the head, but Kaos counters it with
a duck-down move.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.
Kaos goes for a back suplex, but Pagan counters it with a cross-body block.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, thr... kickout.)
Chip: One! Two! No!
Fool: I really thought Pagan had him that time.
(Pagan goes for a Tombstone, but Kaos blocks it.
Kaos whips Pagan into the ropes.
Pagan misses with a kick.
Pagan takes Kaos down with a swinging neckbreaker.
Pagan is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Pagan hits Kaos with a standing moonsault.)
Chip: The cover!
(Chad Bray counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.)
Fool: No, sir! Kaos gets the shoulder up!
(Pagan gets the STF on Kaos.
Kaos reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Kaos hits Pagan with a Frankensteiner.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Kaos complains about a slow count.
Kaos tags out to Hot Shot Donovan.)
Chip: Kaos nearly gets the pin!
Fool: And he finally tags in Donovan!
(Mr. Shhh enters the ring and lays out Kaos.
Pagan and Mr. Shhh whip Hot Shot Donovan into the ropes.
They hit Hot Shot Donovan with a double backdrop.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.
Pagan nails Hot Shot Donovan with a swinging punch.
Pagan goes for a swinging punch, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan takes Pagan down with a swinging neckbreaker.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a kneelift on Pagan.
Hot Shot Donovan tags out to Kaos.
Mr. Shhh enters the ring and throws Hot Shot Donovan out of the ring.
The crowd is behind Mr. Shhh all the way.
Mr. Shhh leaves the ring.)
Chip: It's Kaos in the ring with Pagan.
Fool: I don't know. Kaos didn't have too long to rest.
Jeff: 15 minutes gone by. There are 15 minutes remaining.
(Pagan nails Kaos with a single-leg takedown.
Mr. Shhh enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Hot Shot Donovan enters the ring and lays out Mr. Shhh.
The crowd is going crazy.
Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan hit Pagan with a double clothesline.
Hot Shot Donovan leaves the ring.
Kaos catches Pagan in an armbar submission.
Pagan reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.)
Chip: Kaos tries the submission move.
Fool: Now I think Pagan needs to tag.
(Pagan hits a forearm to the back on Kaos.
Kaos takes Pagan down with a chop.
Kaos takes Pagan down with a springboard lariat.
Kaos is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Kaos tags out to Hot Shot Donovan.
Kaos hits an enzuigiri to the face on Pagan.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a tiger suplex, but Pagan blocks it.
Kaos leaves the ring.
Pagan hits a tilt-a-whirl suplex on Hot Shot Donovan.)
Chip: Tilt-a-whirl! Down goes Hot Shot!
Fool: Mr. Shhh is rested and ready. Bring him in!
(Pagan hits Hot Shot Donovan.
Pagan punches Hot Shot Donovan.
A small "Pagan" chant is being started.
Pagan whips Hot Shot Donovan into the ropes.
Hot Shot Donovan nails Pagan with a chop.
Hot Shot Donovan goes for a palm blow, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan goes for a spinning power bomb, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with
an enzuilariato.
Hot Shot Donovan nails Pagan with a chop.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a savate kick on Pagan.
Hot Shot Donovan executes a jawbreaker on Pagan.)
Chip: Trinity is back in control here as Hot Shot looks for the tag.
Fool: Here comes Kaos!
(Hot Shot Donovan tags out to Kaos.
Kaos gets a spinning toe hold on Pagan.
Pagan tries to escape the hold.
Pagan reaches the ropes after being trapped for 15 seconds.)
Chip: How much more can Pagan take?
Fool: Don't know. And I disagree with what you said earlier. Hot Shot and Kaos have
pretty damn good teamwork too.
(Kaos tags out to Hot Shot Donovan.
Hot Shot Donovan and Kaos whip Pagan into the ropes.
They attempt to hit Pagan with a double clothesline, but he counters it with a
duck-down move.
Pagan hits them with a double clothesline.
The crowd is responding to Pagan.
Kaos leaves the ring.
Pagan hits a spinning DDT on Hot Shot Donovan.
A small "Pagan" chant is being started.)
Chip: Spinning DDT.
Fool: Too much Pagan. But he needs to tag.
(Pagan takes Hot Shot Donovan down with a forearm to the back.
Pagan uses a forearm to the back on Hot Shot Donovan.
Pagan is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Pagan complains about a slow count.)
Chip: I think Pagan wants to finish this match himself.
Fool: Big mistake. You got the World Champ on the apron. Use him.
(Pagan goes for a piledriver, but Hot Shot Donovan blocks it.
Hot Shot Donovan tags out to Kaos.
Kaos and Hot Shot Donovan whip Pagan into the ropes.
They hit Pagan with a double backdrop.
Hot Shot Donovan leaves the ring.
Kaos goes for a hiptoss, but Pagan counters it with a facerake.
Pagan punches Kaos.
A small "Pagan" chant is being started.)
Chip: This crowd seems evenly divided.
Fool: After going through that match at Beach Brawl, what does this say about Pagan's stamina?
(Pagan chops Kaos.
A small "Pagan" chant is being started.
Kaos hits Pagan.
A small "Kaos" chant is being started.
Kaos hits Pagan.
A small "Kaos" chant is being started.
Pagan chops Kaos.
The crowd is responding to Pagan.
Pagan chops Kaos.
Kaos punches Pagan.)
Chip: These two are trading blows. They may have never met, but they're clearly not getting
along.
(Kaos nails Pagan with a hiptoss.
Kaos takes Pagan down with a hiptoss.
Kaos is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, thr... kickout.)
Chip: Wow! Pagan barely kicks out!
Fool: He has to be exhausted.
(Kaos hits Pagan with a bodyslam.
Kaos is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, kickout.
Kaos hits a chop on Pagan.
Kaos uses a cartwheel kick on Pagan.
Kaos goes for an armbar submission, but Pagan blocks it.
Pagan hits a single-leg takedown on Kaos.
Kaos nails him with a lowblow.)
Chip: Low Blow!
Fool: That's gonna leave a mark!
(He goes for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, Sven Pieterson distracts Chad Bray.)
Chip: Sven stopped the count!
Fool: What is he doing?
(Kaos executes a flying clothesline on Pagan.)
Jeff: 20 minutes gone by. There are 10 minutes remaining.
Chip: Kaos is setting Pagan on the turnbuckle!
Fool: It looks like he's going for his inverted Hurricanrana!
(Kaos executes the HurriChaotic on Pagan.
Kaos goes for the pin.)
Chip: What a move!
Fool: he calls that the HurriChaotic!
(There is no referee to count.)
Chip: Sven still has the ref distracted!
Fool: Artful Dodger is climbing to the top rope!
(Artful Dodger enters the ring and breaks the pin with a flying elbowdrop.
Artful Dodger puts Pagan on top of Kaos.
Chad Bray is back on the job.)
Chip: Oh! What a cheap way to win a match!
Fool: Are Dodger and Sven aligned with Shhh and Pagan?
(Chad Bray counts: One, two, Hot Shot Donovan makes the save.)
Chip: Donovan breaks the pin!
(Sven Pieterson enters the ring and clotheslines Hot Shot Donovan.
Chad Bray disqualifies Mr. Shhh and Pagan.
The crowd is responding to Kaos.)
Chip: That's it. Chad Bray is going to disqualify Mr. Shhh and Pagan.
(Sven and Artful Dodger are now brawling with Kaos and Hot Shot as SWF security comes in to
break things up. Sandman and the Men in Black come down to ringside to join Pagan and Mr.
Shhh as they leave.)
Chip: Well, a great match, but a very unsatisfying finish here on Triumphant Tuesday.
Jeff: Here are your winners by disqualification, in 20:21, Trinity!
("Bullet the Blue Sky" plays as security and the referees have managed to separate Sven and
Dodger from Hot Shot and Kaos. Mr. Shhh and company are walking over to the "Wrasslin' Roundup"
set, which has been constructed atop the third base dugout.)
Chip: Well, security is clearing the ring, and we're ready for "Wrasslin' Roundup".
("The Eyes of Texas" plays as we see Texas Pete, clad in his cowboy hat, flannel shirt, jeans
and cowboy boots, make his way to the dugout. He cracks his bullwhip and gets a polite
response.)
Texas: Well, I thought my guest tonight wuz just gonna be Pagan. But it shore looks like...
(Over the speaker system, a voice is heard saying "Bow down to the
Church". "Another Body Murdered" by Faith No More and Boo Yaa T.R.I.B.E. blares
throughout the stadium. The crowd bursts into cheers as Mr. Shhh,
Pagan, and Sandman approach the set. Sandman jumps up onto the dugout, grabs the microphone
away from Texas Pete, and jumps back down to the floor. The three men walk back towards the
ring.)
Fool: I'm still Trinity, but I like the fact that they stole Texas Pete's mike.
Sandman (doing his best ring announcer voice): Welcome to a new era of
the Supreme Wrestling Federation. Please give it up for the most
talked about, most dominating, most genetically gifted men in the history of
professional wrestling. Ladies and gentlemen... THIS IS THE CHURCH!!!
(As the three men step into the ring, they each go to seperate corners
and climb the ring posts while the fans give a very mixed reaction of
cheers and boos. The men all jump down and walk to the center of the
ring and directly into the camera. The music comes to a complete
stop.)
Chip: The Church?
Sandman: Do you think you're ready for this? Do you think the SWF is
ready for this? Trinity sure as hell wasn't ready, what makes the rest
of you think that you are? Well ready or not... we're here.
(Mr. Shhh takes the microphone.)
Shhh: Ladies and gentlemen you see in the ring tonight the greatest
wrestlers of the SWF. We have all had belts at one time or another and
soon we will have more belts then any stable in the SWF. But as much
as I love gold I love power even more. The power emitting from this
group is more then the SWF can handle. You all know us and what we are
capable of as individuals. Now that we are together the SWF we will
bring this federation to its knees!
(The crowd's response with a loud mixture of applause, screams, and
boos as Mr. Shhh hands the microphone to Pagan.)
Chip: It's the World Champion, the Toughman Champion and the American Champion.
No other stable in the history of the SWF has ever done that!
Pagan: Well, well, well. I guess if dysfunction is a function... we
must be some kind of geniuses.
(The crowd pops loudly as Pagan smiles.)
Pagan: You know, guys, I don't think the SWF knows what hit 'em yet. I
think that everyone in this league is still suffering from shock after
Beach Brawl. So maybe we should spell it out for them. We used Gods
Tears. We used Doug Bacon. We used Brian Frenck. To make a long story
short, SWF is Church territory now.
(A mixture of cheers...and boos.)
Pagan: When we say jump, you say "how high?" When we say roll over and die, well...
okay, we wouldn't say that. Death is so much more fun when you lend a helping hand.
And while we're on the subject of rotting corpses, I think The Shhh Man
here has a little message for our good buddies in Trinity.
(Pagan hands the microphone over to Shhh and leans on his shoulder.)
Shhh: Aw yes, you gentlemen in Trinity have had a hard-on for us
since we left. Did you really think that we didn't have a massive plan
of our own to take over the SWF? You of all people to should of known
better. And that brings me to all your wasted threats of retaliation.
Well boys here we are and we are not road kill. So LET'S PLAY!
Sandman: The Church is stronger then Kaos, it is stronger then any
Revolution, it is stronger then any force here on earth or in the
heavens above. People will worship us and beg us to be merciful. Your
souls are ours. The Church of Pain rules the SWF and you are nothing
but minions groveling at our feet.
(A large sign is illuminated near the scoreboard. The lights go out and "THE
CHURCH OF PAIN" illuminates in large red letter as sparks of various
color explodes from the ring posts.)
Pagan: Now that the Church has penetrated the SWF, we're here to
prove that we will always... and I do mean always... be on top.
("Another Body Murdered" by Faith No More and Boo Yaa T.R.I.B.E.
starts to play from the beginning as The Church again climb the turnbuckles to both
cheers and boos from the crowd.)
Chip: Well, The Church of Pain has been here for only three days, and they've
already made an impact on...
(The music is abruptly cut off. Fireworks explode in the makeshift aisleway
A trail of flame ignites starting from the aisleway, down to ringside, and encircling
the ring. Some strange chanting begins to play over the PA system.)
Fool: It's Kaos time!
Chip: We're never going to get to our commercial break.
(Kaos comes out from the dugout, wearing his black hood and robe. As he walks
toward the ring, the flames in front of him die out with each step. He stops at ringside
to grab the microphone from the timekeeper's table, keeping his distance.)
Chip: Kaos is very outnumbered here.
Kaos: "Pagan, you said some things at the PPV that made me
think. Kaos has some things to say to you, and Kaos always
says things to people's faces."
Fool: They're not attacking.
Chip: They apparently don't feel threatened.
Kaos: "Pagan....you are just that. I have no bones with your
methods. I have no bones with your skill. I even have no
bones with your friends. But you, you were one of us at one
time. You were Trinity. You ARE what Trinity is. I am Kaos,
I make no qualms about that, but you, Pagan, are exactly
what brought Trinity to its heights."
(There is a buzz in the crowd.)
Chip: What's this all about, Fool?
Fool: I don't know!
Kaos: "Your words on Sunday, upon further reflection, bear a
lot of truth. The Living Dead are just that. Dead. Where are
they now? No one knows. The Equalizer? His career came to a
smashing end, when a hammer crushed his legs. He was
arrogant, and he was obnoxious. Kinda reminds me of Shawn
Michaels on a bad day, in a way."
Fool: The Dead's not gonna like those words.
Kaos: "Trinity was formed by three people. Yourself,
Sandman, and The Equalizer. One of you is no longer in
wrestling. The other two have allied back together, and like
I said before, Trinity is re-emerging, even if it's under a
new name. The Trinity that remains, being myself and Hot
Shot Donovan, while we can hold our own, I do not feel that
to bear the name Trinity is fitting, for the original
members of the stable are united, and they should hold that
name proudly."
Chip: What?
Fool: He's kidding, right?
Kaos: "Pagan....you left the SWF, and you left Trinity. Now,
you rejoined the SWF, and have allied yourself with a number
of people. You allied yourself with Ex-Trinity members, and
non-Trinity members. You rip off someone else's stable idea,
with The Flock, and try to pawn off another stable's notions
about dominating the SWF."
(The crowd responds, mostly with boos.)
Chip: Strong words from the newcomer.
Kaos: "No, Pagan. Kaos is not here to smack you around. Kaos
is not here to deliver any hidden messages from Trinity. But
what Kaos is here for, is to ask your help. Trinity has
gotten rid of the festering slime that plagued the name for
so long. The Dead are buried six feet under, and The
Equalizer....well, he can go burn in Hell for all we care.
Hot Shot Donovan is a great wrestler, who just so happens to
be suffering for the crimes committed by other people.
Guilty by association, is the term."
{Kaos looks around the stadium.}
Kaos: What Kaos is trying to say, Pagan, is that like it or
not, you and your friends are still Trinity. You carry the
legacy on with you, even under a different stable name. You
know that Shhh and Sandman and Hot Shot proved last year
that Trinity was the toughest stable in the SWF. No one
could touch you. You want to take over the SWF? You have the
right people. Save two.
Fool: Is he saying what I think he's saying?
Kaos: You still lack Hot Shot Donovan, you
still lack Kaos, which is the primary principle trait of
Trinity is it not? You lack Hot Shot, you lack Kaos, and you
lack the name. The name Trinity is a powerful word, or least
used to be. You know the power in a name. Fame. Money.
Power. Trinity has a monopoly of the merchandising the SWF
puts out, and generates obscene amounts of money, just for
the name alone. You want the power? You want to be the best
again? Then reform Trinity.
Fool: Oh, my God!
Chip: He's asking for an alliance! The Trinity, and the Church!
Kaos: Yes, Pagan. Kaos is asking you to reform the one
stable that held the world hostage, and can do so again. You
got rid of the virii that infected it.
Chip: Is that a word?
Fool: Shut up!
Kaos: You have the skill to reunite its members. And you have no personal grudges
against Hot Shot Donovan and Kaos, except perhaps guilt by
association, even which YOU are guilty of. Do what you know
is the right thing to do. Take the Flock, take Shhh and
Sandman. Negotiate with Donovan, and return Trinity to its
rightful glory. Do what Equalizer never could. Rub it in his
face, by taking Trinity to heights he never thought
possible. And why should you do this? Because, Pagan.....you
can.
Chip: I don't believe this. This has to be a setup.
{Kaos leaves the ring, stopping at the aisleway, and turns
back to face Pagan.}
Kaos: "The choice is yours. We will give you one week to
reply."
Fool: Yes! Imagine it, Chip! The whole Trinity back together.
(Shot of the Church, talking amongst themselves.)
Chip: Well, it can't really be The Trinity without Equalizer.
Fool: The hell it can't!
Chip: When we return on Triumphant Tuesday, we'll see Artful Dodger defend
the Television Title. Back after this.
------------------
(Another commercial for the encore presentation. Damn, that was a long segment.)
------------------
Chip: Triumphant Tuesday returns live from Greenville, South Carolina.
Fool: Pro wrestling's highest rated show, each and every Tuesday night!
Chip: We're low on time. Jeff Ayres is standing by for our next match.
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall with
a 10 minute time limit. It is for the SWF Television Title!
["Planet Boom" by Tommy Lee starts to play as the crowd cheers.]
RA: Introducing the challenger, being led to the ring by his manager, Tarzan
Taborda, from Oeiras, Portugal, weighing in at 234 pounds, here is Axel
"The Hammer" Mate!!
[Axel and Tarzan emerge from the dugout as several fireworks are launched.
Axel slaps hands with several of the fans on the way to the ring. The
crowd cheers loudly.]
Chip: What a win for Axel Sunday night as he gets the duke over Biggie Z.
Fool: Forget Axel. He's outclassed already.
[The crowd cheers as "Fire It Up" by Busta Rhymes begins to play.]
Fool: Here comes the man, Chipper!
Jeff: And his opponent! Being led to the ring by his manager,
Westminster, from London, England, weighing in at 178 pounds, here is the
SWF Television Champion, The Artful Dodger!!
[The Artful Dodger and Westminster walk out from the dugout. Dodger is wearing
the TV Title belt. The crowd is going wild as The Artful Dodger makes his way to
the ring throwing silver dollars into the crowd.]
Chip: The new Television champion looks focused.
Fool: And why the hell not?
(The bell rings. They lock up.
The Artful Dodger hits Axel Mate with a springboard dropkick.
The Artful Dodger whips Axel Mate into the ropes.
The Artful Dodger misses with a shoulderblock.
The Artful Dodger goes for a clothesline, but Axel Mate counters it with
a duck-down move.
Axel Mate kicks The Artful Dodger.
There's a small reaction to Axel Mate.)
Chip: Nice kick by Axel. The Hammer is an international star and a ring veteran.
Fool: But he's no Dodger!
(Axel Mate kicks The Artful Dodger.
The crowd is responding to Axel Mate.
The Artful Dodger executes a slingshot facebuster on Axel Mate.
A small "The Artful Dodger" chant is being started.
The Artful Dodger goes for a spinning DDT, but Axel Mate counters it with
a backdrop.
Axel Mate poses for the crowd.)
Chip: A ten minute time limit doesn't leave much time to pose.
Fool: Gotta agree with you there, Chip.
(A small "Axel Mate" chant is being started.
Axel Mate whips The Artful Dodger into the ropes.
The Artful Dodger hits Axel Mate with a backdrop.
Axel Mate falls out of the ring.
The Artful Dodger goes through the ropes.
They're brawling inside the ring area.)
Chip: The fight is going to the floor!
Fool: And the King of the Britons, Artful Dodger, is in command!
(The Artful Dodger takes Axel Mate down with a clothesline.
The Artful Dodger struts across the ring.
A small "The Artful Dodger" chant is being started.
Chris Carroll counts: 1.
The Artful Dodger goes for a Boston crab, but Axel Mate blocks it.
Chris Carroll counts: 2.
The Artful Dodger is busted wide open.)
Chip: Oh! Dodger busted open by one of those shots.
Fool: As long as he keeps the belt.
(Axel Mate hits The Artful Dodger with a Frankensteiner.
Chris Carroll counts: 3.
Axel Mate goes for a double underhook piledriver, but The Artful Dodger
blocks it.
Chris Carroll counts: 4.
Chris Carroll counts: 5.
The Artful Dodger goes for a DDT, but Axel Mate counters it with a backdrop.)
Chip: What do you suppose The Church will have to say about that attack earlier
by Dodger and Sven.
Fool: I don't know. What will Trinity have to say?
(Axel Mate takes The Artful Dodger down with a European uppercut.
Axel Mate throws The Artful Dodger back into the ring.
The Artful Dodger goes for a front facelock, but Axel Mate counters it with
a backdrop.
The Artful Dodger begs off.
Axel Mate goes for a clothesline, but The Artful Dodger counters it with
a duck-down move.
The Artful Dodger gets a choke against the ropes on Axel Mate.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, three.)
Fool: What's great about Dodger is that he knows just how far to bend the rules.
Chip: No sense risking the DQ yet.
(The Artful Dodger punches Axel Mate.
Axel Mate kicks The Artful Dodger.
The Artful Dodger begs off.
Axel Mate takes The Artful Dodger down with a Russian legsweep.
Axel Mate takes The Artful Dodger down with a German suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Fool: No, sir!
Chip: There will be no SWF Around the World this week due to Arena Football, but don't
miss SWF Slaughterhouse this Sunday night as Gods Tears battles Tom Pho.
(Axel Mate executes a flying bulldog on The Artful Dodger.
Axel Mate takes The Artful Dodger down with a Big Leg Drop.
There are lots of chants for Axel Mate.
Axel Mate hits a jack-knife power bomb on The Artful Dodger.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Fool: No soup for you!
Chip: Just a count away from a new television champion there.
(Axel Mate hits The Artful Dodger with a dropkick.
The Artful Dodger places Axel Mate on the turnbuckle.
The Artful Dodger goes for a top-rope DDT, but Axel Mate blocks it.
Axel Mate throws The Artful Dodger off the turnbuckle.
Axel Mate runs into the ropes.
The Artful Dodger goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but Axel Mate
counters it with a punch.)
Chip: A definite power advantage for the challenger.
Fool: You don't say.
(The Artful Dodger takes Axel Mate down with a clothesline.
The crowd is going crazy.
The Artful Dodger catches Axel Mate in a figure-four leglock.
Axel Mate's shoulders are on the mat.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.
The Artful Dodger complains about a slow count.)
(Shot of the Sportin' Fool jumping up and down and shaking his car keys.)
Fool: Start the bus, baby!
Chip: Settle down, Beavis.
(Axel Mate tries to fight the pain.
Axel Mate's shoulders are on the mat.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Axel Mate breaks the hold after 30 seconds.)
Chip: Dodger really wore down Mate with that figure-four.
Fool: That's what he needed. That turned the tide.
(Axel Mate punches The Artful Dodger.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 5 minutes remaining.
Chip: And both wrestlers will turn it up a notch!
(Axel Mate chops The Artful Dodger.
The Artful Dodger punches Axel Mate.
The Artful Dodger punches Axel Mate.
The crowd is cheering on The Artful Dodger.
Axel Mate executes a backbreaker on The Artful Dodger.
Axel Mate nails The Artful Dodger with a splash.)
Fool: No!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: You'll get nothing and like it!
(Axel Mate whips The Artful Dodger into the ropes.
Axel Mate misses with a shoulderblock.
The Artful Dodger hits Axel Mate with an elbow.
The Artful Dodger catches Axel Mate in a front facelock.
Axel Mate tries to escape the hold.
Axel Mate breaks the hold after 9 seconds.)
Chip: Back and forth action here on Triumphant Tuesday.
(The Artful Dodger uses a crotch slam on Axel Mate.
The crowd is really behind The Artful Dodger.
The Artful Dodger executes a Soviet suplex on Axel Mate.
The Artful Dodger is going for the pin.)
Chip: The cover! One, two...!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, three.
The crowd erupts.)
Fool: Yes! He got him!
Chip: The Dodger retains the Television Title! For now.
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 6:18, and still SWF Television Champion, The Artful Dodger!
(Artful Dodger grabs his title belt and holds it in the air, waiting for the opening
notes of "Fire it Up". But it never comes. Instead, we hear..."I shot the Sheriff".)
Chip: What's going on?
(The Judge emerges from the dugout. He is holding a microphone and is wearing all black.
Black suit, black shirt, pants, shoes... He is keeping a close eye on Axel Mate. The Judge
makes his way to the front of the ring...)
Fool: How the hell do all these people get microphones? How many microphones do we have?
(The Judge steps closer to the ring, and brings the microphone to his mouth.)
Judge: Today... Today marks a new chapter, in regards to the New Justice.
A chapter that has many plots. Many different stories, merging into one.
One of these plots... One of them, involves a man who needs no
introduction. A... Legend, in his own right...
(The Judge looks around at the crowd, to see and hear the reaction. The
crowd cheers wildly.)
Chip: Axel is a legend. He's right.
Fool: Axel? I thought he was talking about me! Or maybe Dodger.
Judge: But also... Also, a pathetic fool...
Chip: He IS talking about you...
Judge: ...who is, Axel Mate. For many a time, I have waited for your return,
Axel Mate. I have waited for the opportunity to end a great injustice, that
has been plaguing the SWF. Mainly, you.
(The crowd boos.)
Fool: Tell 'em, Judge! Hey, as long as he's after Axel...
Judge: I feel the power of justice, running through my veins. My
driving force, that guides me through the SWF. The power has lead me to
you. Justice wants to be served, Axel Mate. Justice will be served - and
you will reap the pain of the Death Sentence.
(The Judge closes his eyes and lowers his head. He then, quickly and
suddenly, flings his head up. Fire individually come from the ring posts,
startling Axel Mate and Artful Dodger briefly.)
Judge: Justice... For... Life!
("I Shot the Sheriff" begins to play again, and the Judge slowly leaves the
ring area.)
Chip: Wow. The Judge calls out Axel Mate.
Fool: Yeah. But don't forget the important part. Dodger won.
Chip: Well, this has been a wild one tonight. When we return, we'll see Gods
Tears and Doug Bacon battle El Cholo and Tom Pho! Fans, don't you go away!
------------------------------------
(Yet another Beach Brawl encore commercial. Last one, I swear.)
-----------------------------------------
Chip: Welcome back to Triumphant Tuesday, as the SWF tries to recover from
Beach Brawl.
Fool: Recover? Doesn't look like we're slowing down at all.
Chip: Fans, if you missed SWF Beach Brawl live in Nags Head this Sunday, I
urge you to order the encore presentation on pay-per-view tomorrow night.
Fool: Or just get one of your friends to give you the tape.
Chip: But right now, we have the continuation of the war between the MIA's and
the SOB's. Let's get up to the ring!
Jeff: The following match is set for one fall, with a 30 minute time limit. It is our
MAIN EVENT!
(The crowd roars as the lights go out.)
Fool: Well, our REAL main event was that Church vs. Trinity match!
Chip: This won't suck either.
(The letters MIA, in red laser lights are lit up in the center of the ring. The letters
flash on and off, moving down the aisle, until they reach the dugout, where they illuminate
"Tiger" Tom Pho and...)
Voice: M-I-A.
Chip: I MUST be seeing things!
("The Gordita National Anthem" begins to play. The crowd roars as they see El Cholo being
CARRIED to the ring on a gold litter, much the same way Randy Savage used to be carried to
the ring when he was The Macho King. He is holding one of the Tag Team Title Belts. But
the fans aren't cheering for him.)
Fool: No, you're not! Those are the Hooters girls.
(Yes, carrying the litter with El Cholo on it are TWENTY Hooters girls, in their Hooters T-shirts.)
Jeff: Introduing first, at a total combined weight of 483 pounds, here are Tom Pho and El Cholo,
representing the MIA's!
Chip: I've just been handed a note. Tonight's edition of Triumphant Tuesday is being sponsored
in part by Hooters Restaurant on Mauldin Road here in Greenville!
Fool: Hoo wah!
(The litter pulls up to the ring. The Hootesr girls line up in front of Cholo and Pho. They bark
some orders at the girls, who fan out and surround the ring.)
Chip: Oh, my God! They've hired the Hooters girls as...as lumberjacks! It's a lumberjack match!
Fool: This would happen AFTER I get married.
Jeff: And their opponents...
["Hands Of Death" by Ron Zombie and Alice Cooper starts to play.]
Jeff: Weighing in at a total combined weight of 620 pounds, and accompanied by Paul Von Braun, here
are Gods Tears and Doug Bacon, The S.O.B.'s!!
["Hands of Death" by Alice Cooper and Rob Zombie continues to play as God's
Tears, chugging a beer and smoking a cigarette, makes his way from the dugout. He is followed
closely by Bacon and Von Braun. Bacon has the area around his throat taped.]
Chip: I'm amazed that Bacon actually agreed to team with GT after Sunday night.
Fool: Come on! GT wasn't turning on Bacon! He was trying to help.
(Gods Tears and Doug Bacon enter the ring. GT holds his bear above him to guzzle it...
and is kicked in the stomach by Doug Bacon!)
Fool: I could be wrong.
(Doug Bacon drives an elbow into Gods Tears' head. He then picks GT up and slams him down with a
choke-slam.
He walks out of the ring, taking Paul Von Braun and two Hooters girls with him.
The bell rings.)
Chip: Gods Tears has been decimated by Doug Bacon!
Fool: And the match has just started! He's abandoning Tears to be beaten by the MIA's.
(Tom Pho punches Gods Tears.
Tom Pho is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Tom Pho kicks Gods Tears.
The crowd is cheering on Tom Pho.
Tom Pho chops Gods Tears.
Tom Pho is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Chip: Jeff Ayres is on his way over to interview Doug Bacon.
Fool: Good luck...
(Gods Tears kicks Tom Pho.
A small "Gods Tears" chant is being started.
Gods Tears runs into the ropes.
Gods Tears hits Tom Pho with a dropkick to the knee.
Gods Tears goes for a faceslam, but Tom Pho blocks it.
Tom Pho hits a tiger suplex on Gods Tears.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: This is a handicap match now. There's no one for GT to tag in!
Fool: Hey, let's go over to Jeff...
(There are lots of chants for Tom Pho.
Tom Pho goes for a piledriver, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears hits a kick to the midsection on Tom Pho.
Jeff Ayres is standing the aisle with Doug Bacon, Paul Von Braun and the two Hooters
girls.)
Jeff: Doug Bacon. A few questions if you can. Why did you attack Gods Tears?
He was the only man on your side at Beach Brawl!
(Gods Tears punches Tom Pho.
Gods Tears punches Tom Pho.
Gods Tears uses a ropeburn on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears uses a faceslam on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears gives the sign for the Drunken Rage.)
Bacon: He's in bed with the rest of them! A big plan to cost me the
title. They all planend it, so little puffie Mr. Shhh can keep the
World Championship Belt. Before I left, I ruled this league as the
King of the SWF with Trinity and Jagged Edge, and everybody else, on
the side begging for attention.
(Gods Tears goes for the Drunken Rage, but Tom Pho counters it with an elbowsmash.
Tom Pho whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears bumps into Andrew Borgert.
Gods Tears hits a Japanese armdrag takedown on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears runs into the ropes.
Gods Tears goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Tom Pho counters it with
a side step.)
Bacon: I will rule the league once again, and Mr. Shhh and all his little
pals know it. It's just a matter of time.
(Bacon and company leave and head back into the dugout.)
Jeff: Back to you, guys.
(Tom Pho tags out to El Cholo.
El Cholo and Tom Pho whip Gods Tears into the ropes.
They hit Gods Tears with a double clothesline.
Tom Pho takes Gods Tears down with a thrust kick to the head.
The crowd is going crazy.
El Cholo takes Gods Tears down with a dragon suplex.)
Chip: Thanks, Jeff. Cholo has GT down, but referee Andrew Borgert is also down!
Fool: Bacon did the right thing. You can't team with guys you don't trust.
Chip: This from Mr. Trinity.
(There is no referee to count.
Tom Pho leaves the ring.
Gods Tears executes an avalanche on El Cholo.
The crowd is cheering on Gods Tears.
Gods Tears takes El Cholo down with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle.
There is no referee to count.
Andrew Borgert is back on the job.)
Chip: Well, Borgert is back on his feet, and the MIA continue to press the advantage.
Fool: If the MIA's win, it still counts as a win over GT and Bacon.
(Gods Tears whips El Cholo into the ropes.
El Cholo hits Gods Tears with a shoulderblock.
El Cholo hits Gods Tears with a dropkick to the knee.
El Cholo whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears takes El Cholo down with a fist to the midsection.
Gods Tears nails El Cholo with a jawbreaker.
The crowd is cheering on Gods Tears.)
Chip: Tears is fighting back!
Fool: That won't last.
(Gods Tears goes for a kick to the midsection, but El Cholo blocks it.
El Cholo chops Gods Tears.
El Cholo chops Gods Tears.
The crowd is cheering on El Cholo.
El Cholo tags out to Tom Pho.
Tom Pho uses the Stinger Splash on Gods Tears.
Tom Pho locks Gods Tears in a sleeperhold.
Gods Tears is valiantly trying to break the hold.)
Chip: Sleeper by Pho, and Gods Tears is struggling.
Fool: Pho is a hell of a wrestler when he's sober.
(Gods Tears reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Gods Tears nails Tom Pho with a brain buster.
Gods Tears takes Tom Pho down with a Vader attack.
Gods Tears nails Tom Pho with a Tombstone.
Gods Tears nails Tom Pho with a kick to the head.
Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: I don't believe it! Tears almost won again!
(A shot of Brian Frenck, talking with a blonde Hooters girl.)
Frenck: You're not the first person to tell me I look like Kevin Nash...
Fool: Good grief.
(Gods Tears hits Tom Pho with a Vader attack.
Gods Tears uses a low blow on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears whips Tom Pho into the ropes, but Tom Pho reverses it.
Gods Tears misses with a clothesline.
Gods Tears hits Tom Pho with an elbow.
Gods Tears goes for a chinlock deathlock submission, but Tom Pho
counters it with a facerake.
Tom Pho chops Gods Tears.)
Fool: Pho needs to make a tag here. They can take advantage of GT.
(Shot of Tim Parker talking with an Oriental Hooters girl.)
Parker: Why, yes, I know Mr. Shhh personally.
Chip: This is really lame.
(The crowd is going crazy.
Tom Pho kicks Gods Tears.
The crowd is going crazy.
Tom Pho whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears takes Tom Pho down with a knee to the back.
Gods Tears uses a jawbreaker on Tom Pho.
The crowd is cheering on Gods Tears.
Gods Tears throws Tom Pho out of the ring.
Gods Tears goes through the ropes.
Pat McNeill is talking to a Hooters girl.)
McNeill: Did I mention that I'm a lawyer.
(Gods Tears offers one of the Hooters girls a sip of beer.
Tom Pho grabs the beer away.
Andrew Borgert counts: 1.
Gods Tears uses a kick to the head on Tom Pho.
Andrew Borgert counts: 2.
Tom Pho drops the beer.
Andrew Borgert counts: 3.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Andrew Borgert counts: 4.
Andrew Borgert counts: 5.
Gods Tears reenters the ring.
Tom Pho follows him back in.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Fool: Pho really needs to go to AA.
(Gods Tears executes a jawbreaker on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears executes a faceslam on Tom Pho.
Gods Tears executes the Drunken Rage on Tom Pho.
Tom Pho tries to fight the pain.
Tom Pho tries to escape the hold.)
Chip: Drunken Rage! Tom Pho is in trouble!
Fool: Can you imagine if Gt beats both MIA's by himself in this match?
(Tom Pho is inching his way towards the ropes.
Tom Pho is barely hanging in there.
Andrew Borgert asks Tom Pho if he's had enough.
Tom Pho shakes his head.
Andrew Borgert checks Tom Pho's arm.
He lifts it... it stays up !
Tom Pho fights his way out of the hold after 44 seconds.)
Chip: And Tom Pho finally makes it to his corner.
Fool: Gods Tears has to be exhausted.
(Tom Pho tags out to El Cholo.
Tom Pho goes for a flying lariat, but Gods Tears counters it with
a duck-down move.
Tom Pho leaves the ring.
El Cholo hits Gods Tears with a leg lariat.
El Cholo goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears uses a headbutt on El Cholo.
Gods Tears goes for a brain buster, but El Cholo counters it with
a vertical suplex.
Tom Pho enters the ring to make it two-on-one.)
Chip: A double team by the MIA's.
Fool: Well, first the Revolution goes under. Now the SOB's have split.
What a week.
(Tom Pho hits a flying lariat on Gods Tears.
El Cholo hits a dragon suplex on Gods Tears.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, in the ropes...
The crowd is going crazy.)
Chip: Another narrow escape for GT.
(El Cholo and Tom Pho hit Gods Tears with a double elbowdrop.
Tom Pho leaves the ring.
El Cholo goes for the Garvin Stomp, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears takes El Cholo down with a forearm to the back.
El Cholo begs off.
Gods Tears goes for a punch, but El Cholo reverses it.)
Chip: This is the first time we've seen El Cholo team with Tom Pho, and they
look sharp.
Fool: But they're only fighting one guy!
(El Cholo uses a kick to the head on Gods Tears.
El Cholo is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Tom Pho enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
El Cholo and Tom Pho hit Gods Tears with a double elbowdrop.
Tom Pho uses a flying lariat on Gods Tears.
El Cholo uses a dragon suplex on Gods Tears.
Both men's shoulders are on the mat.)
Chip: They're about to pin each other!
(Andrew Borgert counts: One, El Cholo lifts a shoulder, two, three.
The crowd is really behind El Cholo.)
Chip: He got him! Cholo just manages to lift his shoulder!
Fool: This is a huge win for the MIA's, Chip!
Jeff: Here are your winners, in 8:24, the MIA's!
("The Gordita National Anthem" plays as Cholo and Tom Pho celebrate with the
Hooters girls.)
Fool: Guess where the post-show party is going to be!
Chip: What a show we've seen tonight. We're out of time. Fans, join us next
week as we see Hexx battle Kaos, and The Church of Pain responds to Trinity.
Don't miss it!
Fool: Be there!
(We see Chip and The Fool put down their headsets, and join the Hooters girls, who
are talking with El Cholo and Tom Pho. We see Brian Frenck, Pat McNeill and Tim Parker
hop the railing to join the fun.
The shot fades.)
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c) 1998 SWF Triumphant Tuesday
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