------------------------------------------
(A shot of a cheering arena crowd.)
Announcer: Seen live by over a million fans every year.
(A shot of the interior of the SWF broadcast truck.)
Announcer: And by over ten million people a week on television.
(The SWF logo appears on the screen)
Announcer: The Supreme Wrestling Federation.
The S-W-F.
--------------------------------------------
(The shot opens into the media room of the Kiel Center in St. Louis. The SWF logo is painted
on the wall as we join SWF officials Vice-Presidents Patrick McNeill and Tim Parker, in
their SWF Hostile Takeover T-shirts, with SWF President Brian Frenck in his Oakland Raiders
jersey. Frenck is talking on his cell phone.)
Brian: ...I don't care! Just remind them that, unless there's a body, they can't collect on
his SWF life insurance. It's all right there in the policy that Pat drew up. Okay. Bye.
(Frenck hangs up.)
Pat: Well, with Hexx missing, we need someone to take the TV Title match against Tanner.
Brian: Fine. You guys have the names of all the eligible wrestlers. Just draw another name.
(We see Tim Parker take about twenty paper slips and drop them into an official SWF baseball
cap. He shakes the cap back and forth to shuffle the names.)
Pat: Okay. Here goes.
(McNeill reaches his hand in and pulls out a slip. He unfolds it and hands the slip over to
Brain Frenck, who looks shocked.)
Frenck: Is he even here?
McNeill: He better be. Every person who's eligible for this belt was told to be here tonight.
Parker: I'll find him. (He leaves the room.)
Chip: Who will get the Television Title shot tonight? SWF Triumphant Tuesday is next!
---------------------------------------------
(An overhead shot of a wrestling ring in the middle of a vacant parking lot in a big city.
Night time. The opening bars of "The Extremist" by Joe Satriani play as we see shadowy figures
approach the ring from all sides. There is an explosion near the ring, increasing the amount
of available light...
And we see the faces of the wrestlers. Jagged Edge and Shae Smith approach the ring as we
see an image of Edge executing the Shattered Dreams on Carey Stone projected on the building
behind him. Doug Bacon wanders in through the parked cars, as Paul Von Braun runs alongside
him, holding a case of beer. We see an image of Bacon executing the Fried Bacon on Eric Wright
projected on the building behind him.
Sandman walks in, waving his pitchfork and accompanied by Michelle. We see a shot of Sandman
knocking Lethal off the ladder projected on the building next to him. We see Pagan, surrounded
by candles, in a nearby alley. We see an image of Pagan hitting the Final Judgment on Mustafa
projected on the wall above him.
A shot of the ground near the ring. The Living Dead emerge through the soil, as a shot of
them hitting the Autopsy on the Westside Ridas is projected on the ground next to them. We see
Rock 'n Roll Animal standing atop a building, as an image of the Animal hitting a frog splash on
Sean Slade plays beneath him.
An ice cream truck pulls up and God's Tears emerges from the back, as a shot of GT applying
the Drunken Rage on Death Angel is projected on the side of the truck. A stretch limo pulls right up
to ringside. We look in the back and see Mr. Shhh and the Men in Black watching a videotape of
Shhh hitting the Peacemaker on Akira the Samurai.
Cut to an overhead shot of the ring, with the SWF wrestlers approaching from all sides. As
they are all about to enter, we see a burst of fireworks, then the Triumphant Tuesday logo,
followed by another burst of fireworks, which dissolves to...)
------------------------------------------------
(The inside of a packed arena. There are screaming fans and fireworks going off around the
ring and along the rampway. The graphic reads:
"LIVE! Kiel Center
St. Louis, Missouri"
The camera pans the crowd, lingering on some of the unique signs there: "Hi, JC!
WrestlingInc.com ", "We miss you, Hexx.", "Welcome back, GT!", "Church of Pain owns the SWF!",
"Jezebel vs. Stefania: Bikini Contest", "Bring back Siberia!", and three college kids in Biggie
Z T-shirts with a huge banner saying "Justice Department, yo!")
Chip: Welcome, everyone, to St. Louis, Missouri!
(Shots of a bouncy young woman in a Revolution T-shirt.)
Chip: Welcome to the Kiel Center!
(Shot of SWF President Brian Frenck, flanked by SWF Vice-Presidents Pat McNeill and Tim Parker,
along with acting Slaughterhouse producer Sean Clayton. Frenck is wearing his Oakland Raiders
jersey, while the other three men are wearing multi-colored SWF Hostile Takeover '98 T-shirts.
There are three SWF security guards in front of Frenck.)
Chip: Welcome to SWF Triumphant Tuesday!
(The angle pans down to the announce desk, where we see Chip Collins, wearing an SWF blazer and
a red power tie, next to "The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen, wearing a Pittsburgh Penguins cap and
a Church of Pain T-shirt.)
Chip: I'm Chip Collins, along with the man wrestling fans love to love...
Fool: ..."The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen!
Chip: As the wrestling world mourns the apparent passng of SWF superstar Hexx, we are off and
running with another edition of Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: Well, I liked Hexx. I hope he turns out okay. There. That's my tribute.
Chip: Actually, for Tim, that was pretty classy. We have a huge main event tonight as the
SWF Toughman Champion, "Biggie Z" Zack Adams, faces Sean "The Duke" McKenzie" in a non-title
match.
Fool: Two guys I don't like, fighting each other. It's a beautiful thing.
Chip: We will also have more match signings for the huge SWF Hostile Takeover pay-per-view
coming up on Sunday night, August 16th.
Fool: How about the women's Jello wrestling, bikini War Games? I keep asking for it, and they
never listen to me.
Chip: I'm listening to you. Also tonight, a match we've been anticipating for almost two
months, as Gods Tears meets Doug Bacon for the first time.
Fool: Let's see. Bacon's drunk, but GT's crazy. Looks like an even match on paper.
Chip: The controversial Kaos will make an appearance on Wrasslin' Roundup with Texas Pete.
Fool: And people say I'M the one that pisses everybody off.
Chip: We will also see the SWF Television Champion, Tanner Boyle, defend his title against an
unnamed opponent.
Fool: Who is it?
Chip: I don't know! But first, we're opening things up with tag team action, as we take it
up to the ring and Jeff Ayres.
(Ring announcer Jeff Ayres, in his black tux and grey tie, takes the microphone.)
Jeff: The following contest is set for one fall, with a thirty minute time limit.
("Gimme the Prize (Kurgan's theme)" by Queen begins to play as the O.n.E. logo appears on the
video wall.)
Jeff: Introducing first, at a total combined weight of 589 pounds, representing Our next
Evolution, here are Monster Mark and Vigilante!
(The two O.n.E. members walk down the rampway to an unenthusiastic response from the crowd.)
Chip: This is the first time we have seen the tandem of Monster Mark and Vigilante.
Fool: And I should care about this because?...
("Highway to Hell" starts up as the Splash logo appears on the video wall.)
Fool: Are these the Splash Shirts?
Jeff: And their opponents...
(Fireworks go off around the ring. Strobe lights come on, which together with flashing lights
and mist over the entrance, make it look like it's raining over the entrance.)
Jeff: ...being led to the ring by their manager, Candy, at a total combined weight of 465
pounds, here are Rage and Joker: The Splash!
(Candy comes out first through the mist. She is young and attractive, wearing a black Splash
baseball cap, white pants, a black shirt and a life jacket, and she passing out white towels
with a black Splash logo (a waterfall with the word Splash over it). Rage, who is 6'9", 290
pounds, wears black tights that have white streaks on it with the Splash logo on the side.
He also wears a life jacket, and blue boots with orange laces. Joker, who is a scrawny 6'5",
175 pounds, wears white pants covered with the Splash logo. His left boot is white with gold
and the other is black with silver. The crowd cheers them on.)
Fool: What's with this moron? His shoes don't even match!
Chip: That's Joker. I'll think you'll find that this is an exciting, energetic young team.
Fool: You didn't say "talented".
Chip: We'll see about that as Joker starts things off against Vigilante.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Joker runs into the ropes.
Joker goes for a Yakuza kick, but Monster Mark ducks out of the way.
Monster Mark uses a Hotshot on Joker.
The crowd is starting to get behind Monster Mark.
Monster Mark throws Joker out of the ring.
Jeff Hart counts: one, two, three, four, five, Joker reenters the ring.)
Fool: That skinny guy doesn't look so good.
Chip: Joker may be a mere 175 pounds, but we've heard some good things about the youngster.
(Monster Mark goes for a full nelson, but Joker blocks it.
Joker takes Monster Mark down with a dropkick to the knee.
Joker goes for a kick to the thigh, but Monster Mark blocks it.
Monster Mark tags out to Vigilante.
Vigilante and Monster Mark hit Joker with a double bulldog headlock.
Monster Mark leaves the ring.
Vigilante throws Joker out of the ring.
Jeff Hart counts: one, two, Joker reenters the ring.
Vigilante punches Joker.
Vigilante chops Joker.)
Fool: So how'd this guy get the name "Joker"?
Chip: I imagine it's due to his unusual appearance and way of dress.
(Joker chops Vigilante.
A small "Joker" chant is being started.
Joker nails Vigilante with a cartwheel kick.
Joker punches Vigilante.
A small "Joker" chant is being started.
Joker kicks Vigilante.
Joker kicks Vigilante.
A small "Joker" chant is being started.
Vigilante punches Joker.
Vigilante uses a front slam on Joker.)
Fool: But Joker isn't the guy's only nickname.
Chip: Big front slam by the powerful Vigilante. What other nicknames?
(Vigilante whips Joker into the ropes.
Joker executes a flying clothesline on Vigilante.
Joker tags out to Rage.
Monster Mark enters the ring and lays out Joker.
A small "Monster Mark" chant is being started.
Vigilante and Monster Mark hit Rage with a double kneeling headbutt.
Monster Mark leaves the ring.
Rage uses a kick to the thigh on Vigilante.)
Fool: Well, some people call him The Space Cowboy...
Chip: Oh, brother. I should have known.
(Rage executes a tiger driver on Vigilante.
Jeff Hart counts: One, kickout.)
Chip: Near fall by Rage.
(Rage goes for a fireman's carry, but Vigilante blocks it.
Vigilante goes for an enzuilariato, but Rage counters it with a backward kick.
Rage takes Vigilante down with an over-the-shoulder stomachbreaker.
Rage stomps his feet.
A small "Rage" chant is being started.
Rage goes for a stomp, but Vigilante counters it with a roll away.
Vigilante tags out to Monster Mark.
Joker enters the ring, but gets cut off.
Monster Mark and Vigilante whip Rage into the ropes.
They hit Rage with a double elbowsmash.)
Fool: ...Some call him The Gangster of Love...
Chip: Oh! And a big double elbow by the O.n.E. team!
(Vigilante leaves the ring.
Monster Mark goes for an inverted atomic drop, but Rage blocks it.
Rage uses a chop on Monster Mark.
Rage goes for a fireman's carry, but Monster Mark blocks it.
Monster Mark hits an inverted atomic drop on Rage.
Monster Mark hits Rage with a double-axhandle chop.
Vigilante enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Monster Mark and Vigilante whip Rage into the ropes.
They attempt to hit Rage with a double backdrop, but he counters it with a
double headsmash.)
Chip: Great counter by Rage with the double noggin-knocker!
Fool: ...But some people call Joker by his real name. You know what Joker's real name is?
Chip: I'm afraid to ask. What's Joker's real name?
(The crowd is starting to get behind Rage.
Vigilante leaves the ring.
Rage goes for a swinging punch, but Monster Mark blocks it.
Monster Mark throws Rage out of the ring.
Monster Mark goes through the ropes.
Jeff Hart counts: 1.
Vigilante comes over to make it two-on-one.
Vigilante hits a back heel kick on Rage.
Monster Mark gets a full nelson on Rage.)
Fool: His real name is MAURICE! (# Wheet-whoo! #)
Chip: I should have known.
Fool: ...Because he speaks of the pompitous of love...Hoo-wah!
(Monster Mark and Vigilante hit Rage with a double kneeling headbutt.
Monster Mark takes Rage down with a backbreaker.
Monster Mark executes a short lariat on Rage.
Jeff Hart counts: 2.
Monster Mark knocks Rage into the ringsteps.
Jeff Hart counts: 3.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: The action has spilled out to the floor here in this opening contest.
(Monster Mark whips Rage into the guardrail.
Monster Mark uses neck-scissors on Rage.
Vigilante comes over to make it two-on-one.
Joker comes over and lays out Vigilante.
Rage and Joker hit Monster Mark with a double chop.
Rage whips Monster Mark into the guardrail.
Rage takes Monster Mark down with a European uppercut.
Rage uses a tilt-a-whirl suplex on Monster Mark.)
Chip: Tilt-a-whirl by the big man.
Fool: 'Roid Rage doesn't look so bad.
(Rage goes for a vertical suplex, but Monster Mark blocks it.
Jeff Hart counts: 4.
Monster Mark nails Rage with a swinging neckbreaker.
Monster Mark throws Rage back into the ring.
Monster Mark punches Rage.
Monster Mark kicks Rage.
Monster Mark goes for a backbreaker, but Rage blocks it.
Rage tags out to Joker.)
Fool: Here comes Skinny.
Chip: Isn't it time for you to plug your Hotline segment?
(Joker and Rage whip Monster Mark into the ropes.
They hit Monster Mark with a double elbowsmash.
Rage leaves the ring.
Joker goes for a jumping side kick, but Monster Mark ducks out of the way.
Monster Mark takes Joker down with a back heel kick.
Monster Mark whips Joker into the ropes.
Joker and Monster Mark get hit with a double clothesline.
Joker hits a punch on Monster Mark.)
Fool: Yeah. 1-900-SWF-NEWS. $2.49 a minute. You must have your parents' permission before
dialing. I have a real exclusive tonight, if you call before midnight.
Chip: Really? What is it?
(Joker whips Monster Mark into the ropes.
Monster Mark hits Joker with a kick.
Monster Mark tags out to Vigilante.
Monster Mark enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Rage enters the ring and lays out Monster Mark.
The crowd is starting to get behind Rage.
Joker and Rage whip Vigilante into the ropes.
Joker and Rage hit Vigilante with a double kick to the thigh.)
Fool: The big news? I have it on good authority that Hexx has joined the MIA's!
Chip: That's NOT funny.
(Rage leaves the ring.
Joker executes a dropkick to the knee on Vigilante.
Joker goes for a waistlock suplex, but Vigilante counters it with a facerake.
Vigilante whips Joker into the ropes, but Joker reverses it.
Vigilante misses with an elbow.
Joker hits Vigilante with a kick.
Joker nails Vigilante with a spinning mule kick.
Joker hits a flying dropkick on Vigilante.)
Fool: He's going to be Tom Pho's new tag team partner!
Chip: Fans, I apologize for the disgusting comments being made by Tim Thorsen.
(Joker nails Vigilante with a flying karate chop.
Vigilante bumps into Jeff Hart.
You can hear a few scattered fans cheering for Joker.
Joker goes for a savate kick, but Vigilante ducks out of the way.
Joker begs off.
Vigilante throws Joker out of the ring.
Vigilante goes through the ropes.
Monster Mark comes over to make it two-on-one.)
Chip: Vigilante and Monster Mark are really working well as a team.
Fool: That's not it. The Splash just sucks.
(Monster Mark goes for a back heel kick, but Joker ducks out of the way.
Monster Mark hits Vigilante.
Joker goes for a spinebuster slam, but Vigilante counters it with
a kick to the head.
Vigilante uses a kneelift on Joker.
Vigilante reenters the ring.
Joker follows him back in.
Monster Mark enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Monster Mark leaves the ring.)
Chip: You're already on thin ice around here.
Fool: Yeah, whatever. I'm just trying to liven things up...unlike Hexx!
(Vigilante whips Joker into the ropes, but Joker reverses it.
Vigilante hits Joker with a kick.
Jeff Hart is back on the job.
Vigilante nails Joker with a faceslam.
Vigilante goes for a lariat, but Joker blocks it.
Joker hits a spinning mule kick on Vigilante.
Joker throws Vigilante out of the ring.
Joker goes through the ropes.)
Fool: Stringbean is taking this to the floor!
Chip: Referee Jeff Hart is allowing both teams a lot of leeway.
(Joker goes for a spinning mule kick, but Vigilante counters it with a low blow.
Vigilante throws Joker back into the ring.
Monster Mark enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Monster Mark leaves the ring.
Vigilante goes for a short lariat, but Joker blocks it.
Joker hits a waistlock suplex on Vigilante.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: No, sir!
Jeff: 10 minutes gone by. There are 20 minutes remaining.
Chip: I'm amazed that Joker was able to suplex the larger Vigilante.
(Joker goes for a kick to the head, but Vigilante ducks out of the way.
Joker hits a spinning mule kick on Vigilante.
Vigilante goes for a kneelift, but Joker side-steps and Vigilante only hits air.
Joker goes for flying headscissors, but Vigilante counters it with a throw-off.
Joker begs off.
Vigilante nails Joker with a bulldog headlock.
A few fans are cheering on Vigilante.
Vigilante goes for a short lariat, but Joker ducks out of the way.)
Fool: Will this damn match never end?
Chip: Both these teams are evenly matched, Fool
(Joker goes for a spinning mule kick, but Vigilante counters it with a low blow.
Monster Mark enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Monster Mark leaves the ring.
Vigilante uses a flying clothesline on Joker.
Vigilante goes for a forearm smash, but Joker blocks it.
Joker whips Vigilante into the ropes, but Vigilante reverses it.
Joker hits Vigilante with a kick.
Vigilante begs off.)
Chip: Well, this Splash sure looks like they'll be making waves here in the SWF.
Fool: Ah, they're all wet.
(Joker takes Vigilante down with a dropkick to the knee.
Joker uses a spinning mule kick on Vigilante.
Joker tags out to Rage.
Rage goes for a European uppercut, but Vigilante blocks it.
Vigilante takes Rage down with a fist to the midsection.
Vigilante hits Rage with an elbowsmash.
Vigilante goes for a punch, but Rage blocks it.
Rage whips Vigilante into the ropes.)
Chip: The two power men are going at it.
Fool: When's the time limt?
(Vigilante misses with a shoulderblock.
Rage hits a swinging punch on Vigilante.
Rage punches Vigilante.
A small "Rage" chant is being started.
Rage places Vigilante on the turnbuckle.
Rage goes for a top-rope DDT, but Vigilante counters it with
a front-layout superplex.
Vigilante is getting a good reaction from the crowd.)
Chip: Superplex by Vigilante!
Fool: Dammit! I might have to start rooting for T.w.O. if this keeps up.
(Vigilante whips Rage into the ropes.
Rage hits a lariat on Vigilante.
Rage tags Joker.)
Chip: They're setting up for that move they call the Royal Flush!
Fool: How appropriate!
(Rage nails Vigilante with a choke slam.
Joker executes a flying headbutt and goes for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, three.)
Chip: The Splash wins in their debut!
Jeff: Here are your winners, in 13:01, Rage and Joker, The Splash!
("Highway to Hell" by AC/DC plays as Candy entres the ring to celebrate with the Splash.)
Chip: Well, we had an exciting match, and now it's time for Tim Thorsen with the Pringles'
replay:
(Match highlights appear onscreen as The Fool narrates.)
Fool: Okay, Rage hits the Tilt-a-Whirl on Frankenstein. Joker hits a dropkick to the knee on
that loser, Vigilante. Then the Splash hits the Ty-d-Bowl! It's 2000 Flushes for the O.n.E.
Buy some potato chips or something.
Chip: Pringles Potato Chips gives you less grease and more chips. When we return,
we'll see the Television Title on the line, on SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
-------------------------------------------------
(Commercial for Pringles Potato Chips, then an ad for this week's SWF Around the World.)
---------------------------------------
Chip: We're back in St. Louis, on the banks of the mighty Mississippi River, for more SWF
Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: Mark McGwire. Need I say more?
Chip: Well, we're set to see Tanner Boyle defend the TV Title, but we have no idea who
his opponent will be. Let's go to the ring!
Jeff: The following contest is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit, and it is for
the SWF Television Title!
["Is there a heaven foe a Gangsta?" by Master P begins to play.]
Fool: Uh-oh! It's the O.G.!
Jeff: Introducing first, the challenger! Weighing in at 242 pounds, and hailing from
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, he is accompanied to the ring by Mr. Bone Breaker. Here is
The Original Gangsta!!
(A spotlight shines on O.G. and Mr. Bone Breaker as green laser lights criss-cross behind
them. The crowd boos.)
Chip: It's a rude welcome back for The Original Gangsta.
Fool: I wouldn't care if I were him. He gets a title shot in his first match back!
(" Bulls on Parade" by Rage Against the Machine plays.)
Jeff: And his opponent, from New Orleans, Louisiana, weighing in at 285 pounds,
here is the SWF Television Champion, Tanner Boyle!!
[Tanner Boyle comes through the curtains and starts to make his way to the
ring, wearing the Television Title belt. The crowd is cheering him on. Tanner
stops in the aisle and makes an X with his arms and screams as several fireworks
are launched behind him. He then runs down the aisle and slides into the ring.]
Chip: Well, the TV champ looks focused, as usual.
Fool: He's a monster, Chip.
Chip: Chris Carroll is your referee, and we're going to see Tanner Boyle meet The
Original Gangsta for the first time!
(The bell rings. They lock up.
The Original Gangsta uses a Frankensteiner on Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta hits a reverse neckbreaker on Tanner Boyle.
A small "O.G." chant is being started.
The Original Gangsta executes a double underhook piledriver on Tanner Boyle.
The crowd is starting to get behind The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta attempts to place Tanner Boyle on the turnbuckle, but
Tanner Boyle blocks it.
The Original Gangsta executes a double underhook backbreaker on Tanner Boyle.)
Chip: What a fast start by the challenger!
Fool: Tanner's just gettin' whipped so far.
(The crowd is starting to get behind The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta takes Tanner Boyle down with a gutwrench suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: One, two, no! Gutwrench and a near fall. Fans, we have some great SWF
action coming for you in September, as the SWF visits some of the greatest venues
in North America.
(The Original Gangsta goes for a side suplex, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.
Tanner Boyle whips The Original Gangsta into the ropes.
Tanner Boyle hits The Original Gangsta with a kick.
Tanner Boyle whips The Original Gangsta into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta executes a swinging neckbreaker on Tanner Boyle.
A small "O.G." chant is being started.
The Original Gangsta executes a backspin DDT on Tanner Boyle.
A small "O.G." chant is being started.)
Chip: On Tuesday, September 1st, we will have a live outdoor show at Universal
Studios in Orlando, Florida. That show is absolutely free with your paid admission
to the park.
Fool: If you show up when the park opens at 7 AM, you can meet the one and only
Boom-Boom Obuhowich. Whoopee!
(The Original Gangsta uses a jawbreaker on Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta takes Tanner Boyle down with a double underhook backbreaker
The crowd is starting to get behind The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta goes for a bridging back suplex, but Tanner Boyle
blocks it.
Tanner Boyle kicks The Original Gangsta.
A small "Tanner Boyle" chant is being started.
Tanner Boyle hits The Original Gangsta.
Tanner Boyle locks The Original Gangsta in a sleeperhold.)
Chip: Sleeper by the champion.
Fool: O.G.'s probably a little bit rusty after being out for so long.
(The Original Gangsta is struggling to reach the ropes.
The Original Gangsta tries to escape the hold.
The Original Gangsta is struggling to reach the ropes.
The Original Gangsta reaches the ropes after being trapped for 12 seconds.
Tanner Boyle uses a powerslam on The Original Gangsta.)
Chip: Powerslam and Tanner goes for the pin! One, two...!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Fool: No soup for you!
(Tanner Boyle nails The Original Gangsta with a stomachbreaker.
Tanner Boyle goes for a stomachbreaker, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
The Original Gangsta whips Tanner Boyle into the turnbuckle, but Tanner Boyle
reverses it.
Tanner Boyle runs shoulder-first into the corner, but The Original Gangsta
lifts his knee.
The Original Gangsta nails Tanner Boyle with a Victory Roll.)
Chip: Victory roll. Out of nowhere!
Fool: Yes! Here we go!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.)
Chip: He got...No, he didn't! Tanner gets the shoulder up.
(The Original Gangsta nails Tanner Boyle with a bridging back suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta hits Tanner Boyle with a bridging back suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.
The Original Gangsta hits Tanner Boyle with a tiger suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: A series of near falls by the O.G. But Tanner will not stay down.
Fool: Come on, Carroll! Count faster.
(The Original Gangsta goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with a DDT.
The crowd is really behind Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle is going for the pin.)
Chip: Front DDT. He caught the Gangsta off guard.
Fool: No!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: You'll get nothing and like it!
(Tanner Boyle nails The Original Gangsta with a jawbreaker.
The crowd is really behind Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle goes for a bearhug, but The Original Gangsta counters it with
a facerake.
The Original Gangsta throws Tanner Boyle out of the ring.
The Original Gangsta goes through the ropes.
The Original Gangsta hits Tanner Boyle with a brain buster.)
Chip: The O.G. with the brain buster! That's the setup move for the Gangsta's Paradise!
Fool: Let it happen!
(The Original Gangsta goes for the Gangsta's Paradise, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with a reverse neckbreaker.
Tanner Boyle has the crowd going wild.)
Chip: Great counter by Tanner!
(Tanner Boyle whips The Original Gangsta into the guardrail.
Tanner Boyle takes The Original Gangsta down with a back suplex.
Chris Carroll counts: 1.
Tanner Boyle executes the X-Plosion on The Original Gangsta
on the concrete floor.
Tanner Boyle has the crowd going wild.
The Original Gangsta is out cold.)
Fool: Damn! That's gotta Drunken Rage!
Chip: He hit that jackhammer-like move on the concrete floor! The champ is in control!
(Chris Carroll counts: 2.
Tanner Boyle screams.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Tanner Boyle whips The Original Gangsta into the guardrail.
Chris Carroll counts: 3.
Tanner Boyle executes a backbreaker on The Original Gangsta.
Chris Carroll counts: 4.
Tanner Boyle hits a fireman's carry on The Original Gangsta.)
Fool: If he's smart, he'll just dump him out there on the floor.
Chip: I don't know how much longer the O.G. can go.
(Chris Carroll counts: 5.
Tanner Boyle reenters the ring.
The Original Gangsta follows him back in.
Tanner Boyle goes for an inverted power bomb, but The Original Gangsta
blocks it.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 5 minutes remaining.
Chip: The action spills back into the ring as the Gangsta sets for a suplex.
(The Original Gangsta goes for a double underhook suplex, but Tanner Boyle
blocks it.
Tanner Boyle hits The Original Gangsta.
The crowd erupts.
The Original Gangsta chops Tanner Boyle.
The crowd is really behind The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta kicks Tanner Boyle.
Tanner Boyle hits The Original Gangsta.)
Chip: They're trading punches! And the crowd is behind their champion!
Fool: Stupid crowd.
(The crowd erupts.
The Original Gangsta hits Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta chops Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta goes for a bridging back suplex, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with a headlock takedown.
In turn, The Original Gangsta counters it with a back suplex.
The Original Gangsta goes for a reverse neckbreaker, but Tanner Boyle blocks it.)
Chip: O.G. doesn't have enough power to turn Tanner around.
Fool: Hey! Tanner's choking him!
(Tanner Boyle catches The Original Gangsta in a chokehold.
Chris Carroll warns Tanner Boyle to let go.
Chris Carroll counts: One, two, three.
Tanner Boyle takes The Original Gangsta down with a dropkick.
Tanner Boyle places The Original Gangsta on the turnbuckle.
Tanner Boyle uses a belly-to-belly superplex on The Original Gangsta.)
Chip: Belly-to-Belly from the top. That could do it!
Fool: No! Bone Breaker's got a chair!
(Mr. Bone Breaker enters the ring and hits Tanner Boyle with a chair.
Before Mr. Bone Breaker connects, Tanner Boyle moves out of the way.)
Fool: He missed!
Chip: Good! I'd hate to see this match end like that.
(Tanner Boyle throws Mr. Bone Breaker over the top rope.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta gouges his eyes.
The crowd is really behind The Original Gangsta.)
Chip: The Gangsta goes to the eyes!
Fool: Bone Breaker bought the challenger some time to recover, and he's gonna
capitalize.
(The Original Gangsta goes for a Russian legsweep, but Tanner Boyle
counters it with an elbowsmash.
Tanner Boyle goes for a double chickenwing submission, but The Original Gangsta
reverses it.)
Chip: Chickenwing on Tanner!
Fool: Gangsta's Paradise!
(The Original Gangsta executes the Gangsta's Paradise on Tanner Boyle.
The Original Gangsta goes for the pin.)
Chip: The cover! One! Two!
(Chris Carroll counts: One, two, three.
The chants for The Original Gangsta are deafening.)
Chip: Three! He got him!
Fool: New champion! New champion!
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 7:02, and NEW SWF Television Champion, The
Original Gangsta!
("Is there a heaven for a Gangsta?" plays. We see Titan come down the aisle and
help Tanner Boyle to his feet. Mr. Bone Breaker straps the TV Title around the
waist of The Original Gangsta.)
Fool: This man has been so close to winning titles here in the SWF, Chipper. It's
great to see him do it.
Chip: I disagree. He resorted to some dirty tactics there.
Fool: Yeah, but who's got the belt?
Chip: Well, that last match will be hard to top, but Texas Pete is going to try with
another episode of Wrasslin' Roundup.
Fool: Dear God, no.
(" The Eyes of Texas" by the University of Texas marching band plays as Texas Pete
makes his way from the back, wearing his cowboy hat and leather jacket. Upon
entering the ring, he cracks his bulwhip and receives a good reaction from the crowd.)
Texas: Alright. Thank y'all very much,
Fool: You think Kaos knows any good redneck jokes?
Chip: You're in rare form tonight, Fool?.
Texas: Man guest t'naht is the man who gits an Intra-nash-null Tahtle match comin' up
at the paper-view! Please wahlcome Kaos!
(There is a loud explosion of fireworks, and the wall monitor
begins flashing images of Trinity members, and the words 'CHAOS', 'TERROR', and
'TRINITY' are intermixed with them, as sinister laughter breaks out over the PA
system, followed by 'Bullet The Blue Sky' by U2.
Kaos makes his way to the ring, in his black hood and robe.)
Chip: Where did he get that outfit?
Fool: At the KKK-Mart, of course.
(Kaos enters the ring.)
Texas: Well, I saw y'all on the TV Sunday night, and that was quite a match you had
in that four-way.
Kaos: The match on Sunday was......not quite a victory, and not
quite a loss. While we did not win the match, hence the 'not
quite a victory', we did last a lot longer than the Church,
so it wasn't exactly a total loss. I will say this: The
Revolution certainly earned some respect as far as Kaos is
concerned. And that is not easy to attain.
Chip: Here, here.
Fool: The Church was worn out from dishing out that beating last week.
Texas: Now, Pay-gun wants to wrassle you 'n Mr. Hot Shot in a
couple weeks. What do y'all think about this challenge?
Kaos: Is it me, or does everyone want a shot at me? First, the
Swedish Meatball, then the Kold Blooded Lizards, now Pagan
and his partner. Donovan has already accepted the challenge,
and I think now is as good a time as any to announce that I,
too, accept the challenge. But what do I think about the
challenge? I think it just is another step that proves my
theory that the Church can't get Trinity off its mind. And if
the Church wants to deny it, why dont they turn their
attention to someone else? Because there is no one else to
turn to, is there?
Chip: Well, it looks like that bizarre challenge match will take place August 13 on SWF
Around the World.
Fool: But that's another segue entirely.
Texas: You gots a match at the pay-per-view for the Intransh-null Title against The Judge.
I know you beat him once, but kin ya do it again?
Kaos: Can I do it again? Hell, if the sun can rise and set day
after day, Kaos can beat the Judge over and over. The New
Justice has to understand, that there is no force on Earth
that can calm Kaos. And as for that belt around his waist, I
hope he cherishes the few days he has left with it, because
come Hostile Takeover, Kaos will have that belt around HIS
waist. New Justice.....get ready for a little Kaos.
Chip: That will be a great match.
Fool: Oh, no question.
Texas: What do ya think about Mr. Bacon maybe winnin' the World
Title at the pay-per-view?
Kaos: What do I think about Mr Bacon winning the World Title at
the PPV?
Fool: He has that question figured out.
Kaos: If you are asking me if Bacon has a chance of
winning the belt, then yes. If you ask my opinion of the
situation, I can only say this. Bacon is an ex-World
Champion. But if he keeps going on like he is, I don't think
he can win the belt. Since he has turned back to drinking
beer, his mind is receding into the depths of his personal
Hell, and in that hell, he realizes that, while he did end
his career, Bacon's last match against Equaloser was when
Bacon lost the World Title to him. And I think it's only a
matter of time before Bacon snaps completely, and makes the
final leg of his journey into Chaos, and truly becomes One
with Trinity.
Chip: Does Kaos know what he's doing? In the past several weeks, he's managed to
insult everyone else in Trinity.
Fool: Equalizer never would have stood for that.
Texas: Y'all have upset a lot of people and other wrasslers
with the comments you and Mistah Shot have made? Why do ya think the
other wrasslers are so upset at you?
Kaos: Why? Because I am a rookie, with the skills and the talent
to go far. But something is holding me back. For some
reason, I have people with chairs aimed at my head crawling
out of the woodwork. I can hardly get a fair match anymore.
And since I know I have what it takes to be the
International Champion at Hostile Takeover, yet can't win a
match lately to save my life, I have to wonder what it is
that is holding me here. But why are other wrestlers mad at
me? Because I speak the truth, and I am not afraid to tell
it like it is. They want to sugar coat everything, or blur
the facts so that no one can see the truth, but I can see
through it all, and expose them for what they really are.
THAT is why they are angry with me.
Chip: He can fix that on Around the World against the KBK.
Texas: You're kinda new 'round here. There's folks that say
that the Trinity hasn't been the same since Mr. Shushy left.
What'cha gots to say 'bout that?
Kaos: Yes, I am new around here. I don't hide the fact that I am a
rookie. As for the folks who say Trinity hasn't been the
same since Shhh left, I can't say. I was not a part of
Trinity when he was around. Although I did watch it from
home. I can say that Trinity seems to be running smoother
now then it was when he was around. No Trinity members
fighting amoung each other. But The Church.....I can not
deny they are a prominent force in the SWF, but Trinity
simply refuses to die, and someone out there will realize
that one day. As much as the Church and the world wants
Trinity to disappear and never come back, we will not. Why?
Simply because that is what people want us to do. And we
hardly ever do as we're told.
Texas: Do ya have anything to say to the folks that say yer a racist?
Kaos: Kaos? A racist? No way. Sure, I dress in a modified version
of the KKK outfit, hence my latest nickname of Triple K, but
I am not a racist. The slams I made about the Kold Blooded
Lizards were merely in retaliation of their words against
my man Donovan. I could care less what colour someone's skin is.
(We see a man, with a chair, climbing over the railing.)
Fool: That's Sven Pieterson!
Chip: He's sneaking up from behind!
Kaos: Hell, look at Rigor and Mortis. Their skin is falling
off, for crying out loud. Do I discriminate against them?
No. Do I say I won't wrestle someone because they are a
different colour then I am? Hell, no.
(Sven enters the ring and picks up the chair.)
Texas: Uh...
(Kaos turns around, and turns right into a chairshot to the face from Sven.)
Chip: Sven nailed him with a chair!
Fool: There's nothin' like a good interview segment!
(Sven gets a few good stomps in on Kaos while he's down.)
Chip: Sven Pieterson just refuses to let his hatred for Trinity die!
Fool: I can respect that.
(Sven motions to the crowd, and moves to pick Kaos up.)
Chip: Time for the Swedish Slam!
(As Sven goes to pick up Kaos, Kaos, with a final burst of energy, raises his arm
and nails him with a low blow.)
Chip & Fool: OOOOOHHHHHH!!
Fool: My liver! My liver!
(The two wrestlers roll on top of each other, trading punches, as security enters the
ring.)
Chip: What's it gonna take to settle this?
Fool: How about a duel? Pistols at ten paces.
Chip: Fans, we have to step aside for a moment. When we
come back, it's Gods Tears and Doug Bacon!
------------------------------------
("Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" plays as we see Sandman rake Mike
Stevens face against the cage.)
Voice: There's no other event in wrestling quite like it.
(Clip of a blindfolded Vigilante slamming Coldblooded.)
Voice: The ten toughest wrestlers.
(Clip of Jagged Edge locking the Shattered Dreams on Vigilante.)
Voice: Nine brutal matches.
(Clip of Jagged Edge and Equalizer hitting each other with the bullrope.)
Voice: It's the Run of Death. And you'll only find it in the Supreme Wrestling
Federation.
(Clip of Equalizer and War Machine brawling up the aisle.)
Voice: And it begins this Sunday with a 25 man battle royal.
(A clip of last year's Battle Royal, as Dr. Hate clotheslines Jesse Aires.)
Voice: All your questions will be answered this Sunday, on SWF Slaughterhouse.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
(We return to the announcer's table, with a look at Chip & Tim.)
Chip: Triumphant Tuesday returns live from the Kiel Center in St. Louis, Missouri!
Fool: Pro wrestling's highest rated show, each and every Tuesday night!
Chip: Ever since SWF Beach Brawl, there's been animosity between Doug Bacon
and Gods Tears.
Fool: Yeah. It all broke down during that edition of Triumphant Tuesday. You know,
the one with the Hooters girls?
Chip: Yes, that was on June 9th. Now, it's the first meeting ever between these two
hardcore legends.
Fool: Well, what are we waiting for?
Chip: Let's take it up to the ring and Jeff Ayres!
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, this conteset is a special grudge match, set for one fall.
["Hands Of Death" by Ron Zombie and Alice Cooper starts to play.]
Jeff: Introducing first, from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 278 pounds, here is the one
and only: Gods Tears!!
["Hands of Death" by Alice Cooper and Rob Zombie continues to play as God's
Tears emerges from the back. The crowd gives a mixed reaction.]
Fool: GT's from Detroit?
Chip: Yes. He is from the Motor City.
Fool: That's funny. I always thought he was from Montana.
Chip: Tim Thorsen, ladies and gentlemen.
["99 Bottles Of Beer" starts to play, as the crowd gives another mixed reaction.]
Jeff: And his opponent, being led to the ring by his manager, Paul Von Braun, from Sudbury,
Ontario, Canada, weighing in at 335 pounds, here is the legendary Doug Bacon!!
[A huge series of fireworks are set off at the entrance. Paul and Doug
then walk on down to the ring. The crowd reaction is very mixed, but very loud.
Doug enters the ring as the music fades out.]
Chip: Oh, my goodness. Bacon blames Gods Tears for costing him the World Title. Tears
blames Bacon for...well, for everything, I guess.
Fool: It's gonna be wild.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes.
Doug Bacon hits Gods Tears with an elbow.
Doug Bacon catches Gods Tears in an armbar submission.
Gods Tears tries to escape the hold.
Gods Tears breaks the hold after 20 seconds.)
Chip: Bacon starts things off with the armbar.
Fool: Doug wants to do two things here. First, he's going for a quick win. Second, he
wants to make it more difficult for Tears to apply the Drunken Rage.
(Gods Tears uses a Vader attack on Doug Bacon.
A portion of the crowd is booing Gods Tears.
Doug Bacon goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but Gods Tears counters it with
a DDT.
Gods Tears acknowledges the portion of the crowd which is cheering him.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes, but Doug Bacon reverses it.
Doug Bacon executes a short lariat on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Another two count for Bacon. What a night we've had already, with the Original Gangsta
capturing the TV Title, and the war between Kaos and Sven continuing.
Fool: I have a theory on that.
(Doug Bacon hits a brain buster on Gods Tears.
Doug Bacon attempts to place Gods Tears on the turnbuckle, but Gods Tears
blocks it.
Doug Bacon executes the Running Forearm Smash on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Running forearm and a two count as Bacon has GT in trouble. What's your theory?
Fool: Well, I've just noticed that all of our really great shows take place in big cities, in
big arenas. Last week, we were in Ottawa, and we had the Prison Riot match. This week, we're
in St. Louis and we have everything happening.
(Doug Bacon goes for the Running Forearm Smash, but Gods Tears
ducks out of the way.
Gods Tears goes for a kick to the head, but Doug Bacon ducks out of the way.
Doug Bacon whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Doug Bacon goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but Gods Tears counters it with
a punch.
Gods Tears hits Doug Bacon with an avalanche.
Gods Tears hits a dropkick to the knee on Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes.
Gods Tears hits Doug Bacon with a kick.)
Fool: For example, where are we next week?
Chip: Grand Rapids, Michigan.
Fool: See? That show's gonna suck.
(Gods Tears uses a faceslam on Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears goes for the Drunken Rage, but Doug Bacon counters it with a back heel kick.
Doug Bacon nails Gods Tears with the Running Forearm Smash.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, thr... kickout.)
Chip: He got...NO! Tears gets the shoulder up!
Fool: He's taking a beating. It's hard to come back from a long layoff.
(Doug Bacon uses a flying headbutt on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.
Doug Bacon goes for a camel clutch, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes, but Doug Bacon reverses it.
Doug Bacon executes a spinning power bomb on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Another two count! I thought that spinning power bomb would have done it. Don't
forget to tune in to SWF Around the World this Thursday from Sydney, Australia.
Fool: See? That's gonna be a great show.
(Doug Bacon whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Doug Bacon goes for a sleeperhold, but Gods Tears blocks it.
Gods Tears goes for a ropeburn, but Doug Bacon blocks it.
Doug Bacon whips Gods Tears into the ropes, but Gods Tears reverses it.
Doug Bacon hits Gods Tears with a kick.
Doug Bacon whips Gods Tears into the ropes.
Gods Tears hits Doug Bacon with an elbow.)
Chip: Actually, with Pagan defending against Rock 'n Roll Animal, and Hot Shot and Kaos
against the KBK, that WILL be a great show.
Fool: GT's getting in some offense.
(Gods Tears takes Doug Bacon down with a kneeling headbutt.
Doug Bacon goes for a Northern Lights suplex, but Gods Tears counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
Gods Tears uses an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle on Doug Bacon.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: One! Two! No!
Fool: And this Sunday is the Run of Death battle royal, right?
(Gods Tears goes for a kick to the head, but Doug Bacon blocks it.
Doug Bacon punches Gods Tears.
Doug Bacon has the crowd going wild.
Gods Tears kicks Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears chops Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears chops Doug Bacon.
The crowd is wildly cheering Gods Tears with only a few scattered boos audible.)
Chip: Absolutely. The 25 man battle royal on SWF Slaughterhouse this Sunday will enable us
to determine the entire lineup for the Run of Death on pay-per-view!
Fool: That's why the SWF kicks ass. Most of the time, anyway.
(Gods Tears nails Doug Bacon with a punch.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes.
Gods Tears hits Doug Bacon with a shoulderblock.
Gods Tears is going for the pin.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: GT with a near fall.
Fool: Well, the longer this match goes, the tougher it's gonna be to finish off these guys.
(Gods Tears uses a legsweep on Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears goes for a European uppercut, but Doug Bacon blocks it.
Doug Bacon punches Gods Tears.
The crowd is going crazy.
Doug Bacon kicks Gods Tears.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: You can feel the hatred with these two men.
Fool: Bacon's got the most to lose here. If anything happens to him, that cage match with
Mr. Shhh is in jeopardy.
(Doug Bacon has the crowd going wild.
Gods Tears chops Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears punches Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears doesn't quite know what to do with the mixed reaction he's getting.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the ropes, but Doug Bacon reverses it.
Gods Tears misses with a shoulderblock.
Gods Tears executes a clothesline on Doug Bacon.)
Chip: Big clothesline! Down goes Doug Bacon.
Fool: I'm sorry, but these two guys shouldn't be fighting here on Tuesday. They should be
on Slaughterhouse in a steel cage thumbtack death match or something.
(Gods Tears hits a legsweep on Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears hits a kneeling headbutt on Doug Bacon.
Gods Tears whips Doug Bacon into the turnbuckle.
Gods Tears charges into the corner, but Doug Bacon lifts his leg.
Doug Bacon nails Gods Tears with a Northern Lights suplex.)
Fool: Northern lights suplex!
Chip: Bacon with the cover!
(Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.
Doug Bacon places Gods Tears on the turnbuckle.)
Fool: Uh-oh!
(Doug Bacon executes a belly-to-back superplex on Gods Tears.
Doug Bacon has the crowd going wild.
Doug Bacon hits a flying forearm on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: And Doug Bacon is back in command of this one.
Fool: I don't like the guy. But no one in this fed has the arsenal of devastating moves
that Doug does.
(Doug Bacon gets the STF on Gods Tears.
Gods Tears reaches the ropes after being trapped for 9 seconds.
Doug Bacon hits Gods Tears with a flying legdrop.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.
Doug Bacon hits a spinning power bomb on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, in the ropes...)
Chip: That was close! Tears just managed to get a hand under the ropes!
(Doug Bacon executes a short lariat on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two,...)
Chip: He just drove GT into the mat! One...two...!
(...thr... shoulder up.)
Fool: That shock treatment must ave done something to Tears. He won't stay down!
(Doug Bacon uses a backdrop driver on Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Another near fall. And you can see the frustration on Doug Bacon.
(Doug Bacon uses an elbowsmash on Gods Tears.
Doug Bacon runs into the ropes.
Doug Bacon goes for a flying forearm, but Gods Tears ducks out of the way.
Gods Tears hits an avalanche on Doug Bacon.
All of a sudden, the boos are turning into almost unanimous cheers.
Gods Tears hits Doug Bacon with an avalanche.)
Chip: Another splash into the corner!
(Gods Tears throws Doug Bacon out of the ring.
Gods Tears goes through the ropes.)
Fool: They're over here by us now!
(Ryan Wilson counts: 1.
Doug Bacon whips Gods Tears into the guardrail.
Ryan Wilson counts: 2.
Paul Von Braun comes from behind and distracts Gods Tears.
Ryan Wilson counts: 3.
Doug Bacon gets a clawhold on Gods Tears.)
Chip: The claw! Bacon with the Underground Claw right here by our broadcast position.
Fool: He's gonna get them both counted out. But they don't care!
(Ryan Wilson counts: 4.
Ryan Wilson counts: 5.
Ryan Wilson counts: 6.
Ryan Wilson counts: 7.
Gods Tears breaks the hold after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Gods Tears gouges his eyes.)
Chip: GT goes to the eyes!
(Ryan Wilson counts: 8.
A few fans are booing Gods Tears, while a few others are cheering him.
Gods Tears goes for the Drunken Rage, but Doug Bacon counters it with an elbowsmash.
Ryan Wilson counts: 9.)
Fool: Chip, let's get out of here!
Chip: Bacon's dragging GT over....
(We see Chip and The Fool bail out of the broadcast table.
Doug Bacon places Gods Tears on the announcers' table.
Doug Bacon climbs up onto the apron.
Ryan Wilson counts: 10.
The crew switches the microphone feed to the Spanish announcer's table.)
Victor Machsimo: Ay, carumba!
(The crowd is really behind Doug Bacon.
Doug Bacon goes for a flying elbowdrop, but Gods Tears moves out of the way.
The table is broken in half.
Equipment goes flying everywhere.)
Victor: Ay de mi! Que verguenzia!
(Gods Tears executes the Drunken Rage on Doug Bacon.
Doug Bacon tries to fight the pain.
Paul Von Braun hits Gods Tears with a chair.
Doug Bacon breaks the hold after 18 seconds.
The Fool grabs the microphone away from Victor Machismo.)
Fool: Holy s[bleep]! Did you see that, Vic?
(Bacon is starting to move. Gods Tears is out cold. Chip Collins reaches over and grabs his
microphone from the wreckage of the broadcast table.)
Chip: (*crackle *) Are we...(* snap *) That was incredible! Doug Bacon and Gods Tears were
both counted out. Fans, when we return, we'll have more matches for Hostile Takeover, and
Biggie Z vs. Sean McKenzie! Back after this.
------------------------------------
(Two teenaged boys are sitting in front of their home computer.)
Kid #1: This crummy browser takes forever.
Kid #2: Hey, let's hit the SWF website!
Kid #1: Cool!
(The kid types on his computer. Suddenly, Jagged Edge emerges from the screen,
grabs both kids and pulls them back inside the machine.)
Voice: It's a World Wide War of epic proportions.
(The kids have now entered a giant cyber-world, with SWF wrestlers all around. We see Corporal
Punishment and Monster Mark pummeling each other on a wrestling mat that looks like a giant
Excel spreadsheet.)
Voice: In an atmosphere filled with antitrust violations.
(A shot of God's Tears, who has now applied the Drunken Rage on one of the animated monsters
from the game "Doom".)
Voice: When the various alliances in the Supreme Wrestling Federation do battle, there's gonna
be a major system crash.
(A shot of Tanner Boyle slamming Sven Pieterson through what looks to be a Windows 98 logo.)
Voice: "Hostile Takeover '98: Broken Windows". Live on pay-per-view August 16th.
(The SWF is not affiliated with The Microsoft Corporation or any of its subsidiaries.)
-----------------------------------------
(We return to the broadcast table. The top of the table is now sitting on a set of cinder
blocks. There is no equipment on the table. An SWF technician is wrapping duct tape around
the table to hold it together. Chip and The Fool are sitting behind the table, holding their
microphones. Chip's chair is lopsided, as though someone just put a huge dent in it.)
Chip: Welcome back to Triumphant Tuesday. We are still cleaning up from that last matchup.
Fool: Hey, anything can happen on Triumphant Tuesday! Except for Chip getting laid, of course.
You'll never see that.
Chip: I'm just going to ignore that. in a moment, it's our main event. But first, we have some
more matches for SWF Hostile Takeover on Pay-per-view!
(The Hostile Takeover logo fills the screen as "Walking Contradiction" by Green Day plays
underneath the footage.)
Fool: SWF Hostile Takeover '98 will take place on Sunday night, August 16th at Key Arena in
Seattle.
(A pull down menu pops up onscreen. The "Toughman Title" Tab is selected. We see a picture of
"Biggie Z" Zack Adams, holding the Toughman Title belt, standing opposite a picture of The
Artful Dodger, in his trenchcoat.)
Chip: How about this match? We don't know the stipulations yet, but Biggie Z will be defending
his Toughman Title against a member of The Church of Pain, The Artful Dodger!
Fool: Yes! The next Toughman Champion! My boy, Artful Dodger! I like it!
(The "Next" key is clicked, and we see a digitized shot of The Original Gangsta, holding his
new TV Title belt, standing opposite a picture of Fatal Fury.)
Chip: Well, we don't know for sure who will have the TV Title at Hostile Takeover. Right now,
the belt belongs to the Original Gangsta. But Fatal Fury will definitely get the TV Title shot
at Hostile Takeover on pay-per-view.
Fool: One way or another, we'll DEFINITELY have a winner this time. No excuses.
(The "Return to Main Menu" key is clicked, and we see the entire lineup so far.)
Chip: That's in addition to the matches already signed. Mr. Shhh defends against Doug Bacon
in a steel cage, The Thugs vs. Ground Zero, Bill Gates vs. Brian Frenck, and The Judge vs. Kaos.
Fool: And the entire hardcore, bloody, Run of Death! It's a smorgasboard of human misery!
(The "shutdown" option is selected, and we return to the announcer's "table".)
Fool: What about the American Title match?
Chip: I'm told they're waiting for the outcome of Pagan's defense against Rock 'n Roll Animal
this Thursday in Australia.
Fool: McKenzie's gonna be pissed when he hears Dodger gets the title shot.
Chip: And with that, let's go to our main event matchup!
Jeff: This contest is set for one fall, with a 30 minute time limit. It is a non-title match,
and it is our MAIN EVENT of the evening!
["Sons Of Scotland" by James Horner starts to play, and the Revolution logo
appears onscreen.]
Jeff: Introducing first, being led to the ring by Lady Jezebel, from
Edinburgh, Scotland, weighing in at 375 pounds, here is the former two-time SWF
International Champion, Sean "The Duke" McKenzie!!
[The crowd pops as McKenzie and Jezebel walk out the entrance. Several
sparkler type fireworks are launched behind him. As they make their way down to the ring, both
Sean and Jezebel throw white roses into the audience. The fans are going wild
as they enter the ring.]
Chip: What an ovation for Sean McKenzie!
Fool: These people are sheep.
["Walking On The Sun" by Smashmouth starts to play.]
Jeff: And his opponent, being led to the ring by his manager, Ziggy Mour,
from Montreal, Quebec, Canada, weighing in at 333 pounds, here is the SWF Toughman Champion,
"Biggie Z" Zack Adams!!
[Biggie Z and Ziggy Mour emerge from the entrance as the crowd gives a mixed reaction.
They start to make their way to the ring as fireworks go off behind them. Zack is wearing
the SWF Toughman Title.]
Chip: These two know each other very well. They have some respect for each other, but they
do not get along.
Fool: Two guys I don't like putting the smack down on each other. Life is good.
Chip: Chad Bray is your referee, and we're underway.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Sean McKenzie runs into the ropes.
Biggie Z misses with an elbow.
Biggie Z and Sean McKenzie get hit with a double clothesline.
Biggie Z runs into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z with a kick.
Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with a German suplex.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: German suplex and a near fall in the opening moments for The Duke.
Fool: This guy has been focused. And he's got a good streak going.
(Sean McKenzie whips Biggie Z into the turnbuckle.
Sean McKenzie goes for a German suplex, but Biggie Z counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Biggie Z goes for a dropkick, but Sean McKenzie counters it with a side step.
Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: One! Two! No!
Fool (off camera): Thanks. Alright, Chip. I have the word on next week's show.
(Sean McKenzie nails Biggie Z with a European uppercut.
Sean McKenzie whips Biggie Z into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie uses a dropkick to the knee on Biggie Z.
Sean McKenzie uses a diving elbow smash on Biggie Z.
The crowd is starting to get behind Sean McKenzie.
Sean McKenzie uses a Big Leg Drop on Biggie Z.
Sean McKenzie whips Biggie Z into the ropes, but Biggie Z reverses it.)
Chip: Well, I know that next week we will be at Van Adel Arena in Grand Rapids, Michigan, on
the banks of the Grand River.
Fool: That's just...grand, Chip. Next week on Triumphant Tuesday, we are finally going to
have an abandoned warehouse match between Sven Pieterson and a member of Trinity!
Chip: What?
(Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z with a kick.
Sean McKenzie goes for a scorpion deathlock, but Biggie Z blocks it.
Biggie Z whips Sean McKenzie into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z with the Running Forearm Smash.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Near fall by Sean there.
Fool: I'm serious! Sven is going to fight Mortis of Living Dead in a warehouse in Grand
Rapids. And if Sven loses, he leaves the SWF. Be there!
Chip: I question our front office sometimes.
(Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with a Gorilla Press.
Sean McKenzie whips Biggie Z into the ropes.
Biggie Z hits Sean McKenzie with a rolling kick.
The crowd is starting to get behind Biggie Z.
Biggie Z whips Sean McKenzie into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z with a shoulderblock.
Sean McKenzie uses a jack-knife power bomb on Biggie Z.
Chad Bray counts: One, shoulder up.)
Fool: He kicked out at one!
Chip: These two have fought back and forth for months over the SWF International Title. And
it looks like they're prepared to do the same thing over the Toughman Title.
(Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with a headlock takedown.
Sean McKenzie runs into the ropes.
Biggie Z misses with a clothesline.
Biggie Z misses with a clothesline.
Biggie Z hits Sean McKenzie with a kick.
Biggie Z goes for a dropkick, but Sean McKenzie counters it with a side step.
The crowd is starting to get behind Sean McKenzie.
Sean McKenzie executes a European uppercut on Biggie Z.)
Chip: European uppercut. Sean McKenzie has to be one the favorites to win the Run of Death
battle royal this Sunday and take that coveted #10 slot in the Run of Death.
Fool: Nah. Sandman all the way.
(Sean McKenzie runs into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z with an elbow.
Sean McKenzie nails Biggie Z with a European uppercut.
Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with a Gorilla Press.
Sean McKenzie is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Biggie kicks out again!
Fool: McKenzie's got some power to throw HardZack around like that.
(Sean McKenzie gets a double reverse chinlock on Biggie Z.
Biggie Z is valiantly trying to break the hold.
Biggie Z reaches the ropes after being trapped for 17 seconds.
Sean McKenzie whips Biggie Z into the ropes.
Sean McKenzie executes a spinebuster slam on Biggie Z.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Spinebuster and a near fall!
(Sean McKenzie complains about a slow count.
Biggie Z takes Sean McKenzie down with an inside cradle.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: That was dumb! You never take your eyes off your opponent.
Chip: And now it's Biggie Z with the advantage.
(Biggie Z hits Sean McKenzie with a knee to the back.
Biggie Z takes Sean McKenzie down with a DDT.
Biggie Z is going for the pin.)
Chip: DDT! Zack's got him.
Fool: He's going for the cover!
Chip: One! Two!
(Chad Bray counts: One, two,...)
Chip: Foot under the ropes!
(Chad Bray counts:...in the ropes, three.)
Fool: No! The ref missed it! Biggie Z pinned McKenzie!
(Lady Jezebel complains to Chad Bray.
Chad Bray sees Sean McKenzie's foot under the bottom rope.
Chad Bray lets the match continue.)
Chip: Chad Bray is restarting the match!
Fool: That is so wrong! It doesn't matter! Bray counted three!
Chip: Zack Adams is furious! And so is Ziggy Mour!
(Biggie Z executes a flying forearm on Sean McKenzie.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Biggie Z complains about a slow count.)
Fool: I hate to say it, but I agree with Zack! That's B.S. The match should be over.
(Biggie Z nails Sean McKenzie with a dropkick.
Biggie Z uses a kneedrop on Sean McKenzie.
Biggie Z throws Sean McKenzie out of the ring.
Chad Bray counts: one, Sean McKenzie reenters the ring.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: Well, this has been a controversial show so far.
Fool: On second thought, I'm kinda hoping for Biggie to get injured, so Dodger can win the
title.
(Biggie Z kicks Sean McKenzie.
The crowd is cheering on Biggie Z.
Sean McKenzie hits Biggie Z.
A small "Sean McKenzie" chant is being started.
Sean McKenzie chops Biggie Z.
Biggie Z hits Sean McKenzie.)
Chip: I've gotta ask. How is Dodger going to fare in a hardcore match against a guy twice
his size, with the credentials of a Zack Adams.
Fool: I don't know. He looked pretty good in that barbed wire cage last week, though.
(Biggie Z is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Biggie Z hits a flying forearm on Sean McKenzie.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.
Biggie Z complains about a slow count.
Biggie Z nails Sean McKenzie with a clothesline.
Biggie Z is going for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Two more near falls by Zack.
Fool: He's just setting him for that Zack Attack.
(Biggie Z goes for a figure-four leglock, but Sean McKenzie counters it with
a small package.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Small package. And McKenzie nearly wins it right there.
Fool: Well, these two guys should know all of each other's moves.
(Sean McKenzie executes a Gorilla Press on Biggie Z.
A small "Sean McKenzie" chant is being started.
Sean McKenzie locks Biggie Z in a grapevine.
Biggie Z is valiantly trying to break the hold.
Biggie Z reaches the ropes after being trapped for 10 seconds.
Sean McKenzie throws Biggie Z out of the ring.)
Chip: McKenzie's taking it out to the floor.
Fool: I'm ready. This time I'm running to the back.
(Sean McKenzie goes through the ropes.
Sean McKenzie uses a double-axhandle chop on Biggie Z.
Sean McKenzie reenters the ring.
Biggie Z follows him back in.
Sean McKenzie throws Biggie Z out of the ring.
Sean McKenzie goes through the ropes.)
Fool: Make up your mind already.
Chip: Both these guys are at home on the outside of the ring.
(Chad Bray counts: 1.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Chad Bray counts: 2.
Biggie Z whips Sean McKenzie into the guardrail.
Biggie Z executes a jumping DDT on Sean McKenzie.
Chad Bray counts: 3.
Biggie Z knocks Sean McKenzie into the ringsteps.)
Chip: The Toughman Champion is taking over.
Fool: Well, he should have been given the win five minutes ago. He just wants to make sure.
(Chad Bray counts: 4.
Biggie Z uses a clothesline on Sean McKenzie.
Lady Jezebel comes from behind, but Biggie Z pushes Lady Jezebel.)
Chip: He put his hands on Jezebel! Big mistake!
Fool: McKenzie from behind!
(Sean McKenzie executes a double-axhandle chop on Biggie Z.
Sean McKenzie nails Biggie Z with a dragon suplex.
Chad Bray counts: 5.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Chad Bray counts: 6.
Sean McKenzie executes a Big Leg Drop on Biggie Z.)
Chip: Legdrop on the concrete.
Fool: They both have to start watching the count now.
(Chad Bray counts: 7.
Sean McKenzie goes for a DDT, but Biggie Z blocks it.
Chad Bray counts: 8.
Biggie Z reenters the ring.
Sean McKenzie follows him back in.
Sean McKenzie takes Biggie Z down with a Tombstone.)
Chip: Tombstone piledriver!
Fool: Biggie Z is out! But Sean isn't done yet!
(The crowd is really behind Sean McKenzie.
Sean McKenzie executes the Execution on Biggie Z.
The crowd is going crazy.)
Chip: Execution! Execution!
Fool: It's over. Damn.
(Sean McKenzie goes for the pin.
Chad Bray counts: One, two, three.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.)
Chip: Sean McKenzie has pinend Biggie Z!
Fool: It don't matter. Dodger's getting the title shot.
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 9:21, Sean "The Duke" McKenzie.
("Sons of Scotland" plays as Jezebel enters the ring and hugs Sean.)
Chip: Well, what a night it's been. Fans, we've gotta go. We'll see you next week from
Grand Rapids.
Fool: Don't miss it!
Chip & Fool: Be there!
(We see a shot of Ziggy helping Biggie Z back down the aisle as we fade to black.)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
c) 1998 SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
(
geocities.com/timessquare/alley) (
geocities.com/timessquare)