------------------------------------------
(A shot of a cheering arena crowd.)
Announcer: Seen live by over a million fans every year.
(A shot of the interior of the SWF broadcast truck.)
Announcer: And by over ten million people a week on television.
(The SWF logo appears on the screen)
Announcer: The Supreme Wrestling Federation.
The S-W-F.
--------------------------------------------
("Run" by Pink Floyd plays over highlights of the Run of Death Battle Royal from SWF
Slaughterhouse.)
TM: "Titan has the crowd support here."
LC: "Why, I'll never know."
Titan goes for a snap suplex, but Sean McKenzie blocks it.
Sean McKenzie executes a Tombstone on Titan.
The crowd is giving Sean McKenzie a standing ovation.
Sean McKenzie hits Titan with a jack-knife power bomb.
Mark Matarese counts: One, two, shoulder up.
TM: "So close!"
LC: "Dont worry. McKenzie will get him with the next one."
Sean McKenzie goes for a German suplex, but Titan counters it with a facerake.
Titan takes Sean McKenzie down with a short clothesline.
Titan tries to throw Sean McKenzie over the top rope.
He didn't succeed.
Titan tries to throw Sean McKenzie over the top rope.
** Sean McKenzie has been eliminated.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Titan.
TM: "I don't believe it! Titan has won the match!"
Chip: SWF Triumphant Tuesday is next!
---------------------------------------------
(An overhead shot of a wrestling ring in the middle of a vacant parking lot in a big city.
Night time. The opening bars of "The Extremist" by Joe Satriani play as we see shadowy figures
approach the ring from all sides. There is an explosion near the ring, increasing the amount
of available light...
And we see the faces of the wrestlers. Jagged Edge and Shae Smith approach the ring as we
see an image of Edge executing the Shattered Dreams on Carey Stone projected on the building
behind him. Doug Bacon wanders in through the parked cars, as Paul Von Braun runs alongside
him, holding a case of beer. We see an image of Bacon executing the Fried Bacon on Eric Wright
projected on the building behind him.
Sandman walks in, waving his pitchfork and accompanied by Michelle. We see a shot of Sandman
knocking Lethal off the ladder projected on the building next to him. We see Pagan, surrounded
by candles, in a nearby alley. We see an image of Pagan hitting the Final Judgment on Mustafa
projected on the wall above him.
A shot of the ground near the ring. The Living Dead emerge through the soil, as a shot of
them hitting the Autopsy on the Westside Ridas is projected on the ground next to them. We see
Rock 'n Roll Animal standing atop a building, as an image of the Animal hitting a frog splash on
Sean Slade plays beneath him.
An ice cream truck pulls up and God's Tears emerges from the back, as a shot of GT applying
the Drunken Rage on Death Angel is projected on the side of the truck. A stretch limo pulls right up
to ringside. We look in the back and see Mr. Shhh and the Men in Black watching a videotape of
Shhh hitting the Peacemaker on Akira the Samurai.
Cut to an overhead shot of the ring, with the SWF wrestlers approaching from all sides. As
they are all about to enter, we see a burst of fireworks, then the Triumphant Tuesday logo,
followed by another burst of fireworks, which dissolves to...)
------------------------------------------------
(The inside of a packed arena. There are screaming fans and fireworks going off around the
ring and along the rampway. The graphic reads:
"LIVE! Van Andel Arena
Grand Rapids, Michigan"
The camera pans the crowd, lingering on some of the unique signs there: "Solie's kicks Scoops
@$$!", "RIP: Sven Pieterson", "Fear The Reaper", "Ricky, prepare to meet the real Hunter!",
"Justice will be served", "Bring back Flash!", and three college kids in Detroit
Red Wings' jerseys with a huge banner fetauring a picture of Titan with a caption reading "Kip,
don't take this ass-whipping personally!")
Chip: Welcome, everyone, to Grand Rapids, Michigan!
(Shots of a bouncy young woman in a Justice Department T-shirt.)
Chip: Welcome to the Van Andel Arena!
(Shot of the area where the SWF front office members usually sit. Sean Clayton and Zach Lisak
are there, wearing SWF Hostile Takeover T-shirts, but Brian Frenck, Pat McNeill, Tim Parker
and the security guards are notable by their absence.)
Chip: Welcome to SWF Triumphant Tuesday!
(The angle pans down to the announce desk, where we see Chip Collins, wearing an SWF blazer and
a purple power tie, next to "The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen, wearing an Artful Dodger cap and a
Philadelphia Phillies jersey.)
Chip: I'm Chip Collins, along with the man wrestling fans love to love...
Fool: ..."The Sportin' Fool" Tim Thorsen!
Chip: We're here along the banks of the Grand Rivers with another tremendous capacity crowd, as
we prepare to bring you another star-studded edition of SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: Did we find an abandoned warehouse?
Chip: We sure did. For those of you who don't know yet, our main event features Sven Pieterson
against Mortis of the Living Dead, inside an abandoned warehouse. And with the latest on that,
we go to Dean Obermann, who is standing by at the former General Motors parts warehouse on
O'Brien Street, in nearby Walker, Michigan. Dean?
(Cut to Dean Obermann, who is inside the darkened warehouse. The place is a wreck, with boxes
and old auto parts littering the ground. We see a stairway leading up to another level.
Referee Andrew Borgert is standing in the background. Dean takes the microphone.)
Dean: Chip, this is quite a somber atmosphere. We saw Sven Pieterson arrive here a few minutes
ago, and Mortis is here already. There is a small crowd gathered around the building, but no
one else will be allowed inside. This could be Sven's final match, and we'll be seeing it
within the hour.
(Cut back to the announcer's desk.)
Chip: Thanks, Dean. We're all looking forward to that, but there's even more excitement here
at Van Andel Arena. You saw the footage from Slaughterhouse at the top of the show. We will
see the top seed in the Run of Death, Titan, take on the SWF International Champion, The Judge.
Fool: Well, this Titan's a big strong dude, but you have to hand it to The Judge, because he's
got the experience.
Chip: Also coming up in this hour, a tremendous grudge match as Double H, The Headhunter, meets
Ricky "The Wildcard" Watts.
Fool: Things have been pretty tense lately between Revolution and The Justice Department. And
these are supposed to be the good guys!
Chip: Also tonight, we will see the official contract signing as SWF President Brian Frenck and
Microsoft CEO Bill Gates are BOTH scheduled to be here.
Fool: God, I have to root for Frenck. Oh, well. As long as Frenck beats him like a $20 hooker,
I guess it's okay with me.
Chip: Tim Thorsen, ladies and gentlemen. The Original Gangsta will have a TV Title defense and
much more. But right now, we go up to the ring and Jeff Ayres!
(Ring announcer Jeff Ayres, in his black tux and grey tie, takes the microphone.)
Jeff: The following tag team contest is set for one fall, with a thirty minute time limit.
("Madman" by Silverchair plays as black-and-white footage of Madness fills the video wall.)
Jeff: Accompanied to the ring by their manager, Crazygirl, from parts unknown, at a total
combined weight of 524 pounds, they represent the Third World Order: MADNESS!
(Crazygirl and Madness come down the aisle, playing to the fans. The crowd ignores them.)
Chip: We'll see whether Madness has improved since joining the black and blue.
Fool: Don't worry. They're T.w.O. material, all right.
[As Madness enters the ring, the music fades out and "California Love" by 2pac
starts to play. The MIA logo appears in the aisle in red.]
Jeff: And their opponents, being led to the ring by Anna, weighing in at a
combined weight of 496 pounds, here are the Kold Blooded Killaz!!
[The KBK and BBG emerge from the entrance as fireworks continue to
launch. The boos continue as the three head down to the ring.]
Chip: The Killaz are working back through the ranks, hoping to earn a match against The Thugz,
or whoever holds the tag team titles.
Chip: Well, it looks like we'll see Chico starting off against Insanity.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
Chico nails Insanity with a fallaway slam.
Chico goes for a Samoan Drop, but Insanity counters it with an elbowsmash.
Insanity executes a jumping DDT on Chico.
A small "Insanity" chant is being started.
Insanity hits a side suplex on Chico.
Insanity executes a jumping DDT on Chico.
The crowd is starting to get behind Insanity.)
Chip: Jumping DDT! The second in rapid succession by Insanity!
Fool: They told me before the show that they were dying to wrestle KBK again.
(Insanity goes for a fisherman suplex, but Chico blocks it.
Chico hits Insanity with a springboard dropkick.
A few fans are booing Chico.
Chico goes for a backbreaker, but Insanity blocks it.
Insanity tags out to Madman.
Madman goes for an atomic drop, but Chico blocks it.
Chico tags out to El Cholo.)
Chip: Cholo makes the tag! Speaking of tag teams, we have another match to announce for SWF
Hostile Takeover.
Fool: Absolutely, Chipper. On the Free-for-All before the pay-per-view, we will see two of
the SWF's newest teams, as The Splash wrestles the Serpent Squad.
(El Cholo and Chico hit Madman with a double clothesline.
Insanity enters the ring and lays out Chico.
The crowd is starting to get behind Insanity.
Insanity nails El Cholo with a DDT.
The crowd is starting to get behind Insanity.
Madman takes El Cholo down with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: No, sir!
Chip: Cholo kicks out. So we now have a total of 17 matches signed for next Sunday on
pay-per-view. Fans, you will absolutely hate yourself if you do not order SWF Hostile Takeover.
Call your local cable company or satellite provider now!
(Insanity leaves the ring.
Madman whips El Cholo into the ropes, but El Cholo reverses it.
El Cholo hits Madman with a shoulderblock.
El Cholo goes for a dropkick to the knee, but Madman side-steps and El Cholo
only hits air.
Insanity enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Madman and Insanity whip El Cholo into the ropes.
They hit El Cholo with a double backdrop.)
Fool: Why do they have to order now? Won't they still be able to order the night of the show?
Chip: I just read what they put in front of me.
(Insanity hits El Cholo with a piledriver.
The crowd is starting to get behind Insanity.
Madman executes an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle on El Cholo.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: No soup for you.
Chip: By the way, we'd like to congratulate El Cholo for getting that number 5 slot in the Run
of Death.
Fool: So, how's that work exactly? When do we find out the stipulations?
(Insanity leaves the ring.
Madman goes for a belly-to-back suplex, but El Cholo counters it with
an elbowsmash.
El Cholo throws Madman out of the ring.
El Cholo goes to the floor.
El Cholo executes the Run For The Border on Madman on the concrete floor.
The crowd is booing El Cholo.
Madman is out cold.)
Chip: What a move! Twisting running moonsault on the floor!
Fool: Ouch. You still haven't answered the question, though.
(The crowd is booing El Cholo.
El Cholo whips Madman into the guardrail.
El Cholo whips Madman into the guardrail.
El Cholo goes for a gutwrench suplex, but Madman blocks it.
Ryan Wilson counts: 1.
Madman throws El Cholo back into the ring.)
Chip: We will not find out any the stipulations for the Run of Death matches until Sunday, the
16th. But in the past, we have had First Blood Matches, Blindfold Matches, Cage Matches, Falls
Count Anywhere Matches...
Fool: Okay, Private Gump. I get the picture.
(Madman executes an atomic drop on El Cholo.
Madman goes for a fallaway slam, but El Cholo counters it with a forearm smash.
El Cholo punches Madman.
The crowd is booing El Cholo.
El Cholo kicks Madman.
El Cholo chops Madman.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.)
Chip: Now it's Cholo going to work on Madman.
Fool: Never underestimate the power of Gorditas.
(El Cholo whips Madman into the ropes.
El Cholo takes Madman down with a spinning power bomb.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
El Cholo gives the sign for the Run For The Border.
El Cholo executes the Run For The Border on Madman.
The crowd is booing El Cholo.)
Chip: Another Run for the Border!
Fool: Arriba la rasa.
(El Cholo goes for the pin.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, three.)
Chip: He got him! Another big win for the Kold Blooded Killaz!
Jeff: Here are your winners, in 3:24, Chico and El Cholo, the Kold Blooded Killaz!
("California Love" plays as Chico, El Cholo and Anna celebrate in the middle of the ring.)
Fool: Well, that was about what...
(The music stops. We see the GANGSTA logo, followed by the image of King Cobra.)
Chip: Uh-oh.
Fool: He's not supposed to be here this week.
Cobra: Well well well, look at what we have here. The Kold Blooded killers and
Madness...
(El Cholo and Chico laugh and make rude faces at the screen.)
Cobra: Well boys, enjoy what time you have left, because soon enough you're going to fall to
the Serpent Squad. And since I couldn't be there in person I figured we'd leave you with a
little something to remember us by...
(We suddenly see hundreds of tiny snakes drop from the rafters onto ringside.)
Chip: Oh, my God!
Fool: Get it off me! Get it off me!
(Anna jerks the snakes off of her. Chico steps on one, and frowns, picking it up.)
Chip: Fool, calm down! They're just rubber snakes!
Fool: Really?...Whew!
(We see Cobra laughing onscreen. The image is replaced with the Gangsta logo, then fades out.)
Chip: Well, we're obviously gonna see the Serpent Squad debut on Thursday night against Madness.
And they're already making their presence felt.
Fool: Now that I think about it, I guess that was kinda funny.
Chip: From the look of things, I don't think the Killaz, or Madness, would agree with that
statement.
(We cut to a shot of the parking lot outside the arena, where a black limousine has just pulled
up.)
Chip: I'm told that Bill Gates has arrived at the Van Andel Arena. Fans, when we return, the
Television Title will be on the line on Triumphant Tuesday. Stay tuned!
---------------------------
(commercial for Hostile Takeover)
---------------------------
Chip: We're back on the North American Sports Network with more of SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: The show that gives you your weekly dose of the Sportin' Fool, Tim Thorsen.
Chip: Yikes. Last week on this very program, we saw the Original Gangsta make his SWF return,
as he filled Hexx's spot in the TV title match and captured the SWF Television Title. Tonight
he has his first title defense against Mr. Roboto of the O.n.E.
Fool: Being in the O.n.E. is kind of like being a member of Hanson. Except more people hate
you. And you don't get paid as well.
Chip: Let's go up to the ring.
Jeff: The following contest is set for one fall with a ten minute time limit, and it is for
the SWF Television Title!
(The O.n.E. logo appears on the screen as "Mr. Roboto" by Styx plays.)
Jeff: Introducing first, the challenger! Hailing from Tokyo, Japan and weighing in at 220
pounds, here is Mr. Roboto!
(Mr. Roboto comes out to ringside to a chorus of boos.)
["Is there a heaven for a Gangsta?" by Master P begins to play.]
Fool: Here comes the People's Champion!
Jeff: And his opponent! Weighing in at 242 pounds, and hailing from
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, he is accompanied to the ring by Mr. Bone Breaker. Here is
the SWF Television Champion, The Original Gangsta!!
(A spotlight shines on O.G. and Mr. Bone Breaker as green laser lights criss-cross behind
them. The crowd boos.)
Chip: The O.G. makes his way to the ring for his first title defense.
Fool: So when are Animal and Headhunter rejoining the Gangstas?
Chip: I don't think they are.
Fool: Good. Then I can root for the Gangstas.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
The Original Gangsta throws Mr. Roboto out of the ring.
Jeff Hart counts: one, two, three, four, Mr. Roboto reenters the ring.
The Original Gangsta uses a backbreaker on Mr. Roboto.
The Original Gangsta takes Mr. Roboto down with a vertical suplex.
The Original Gangsta is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Roboto into the ropes.
Mr. Roboto and The Original Gangsta get hit with a double clothesline.)
Chip: And both men are down. So, Fool, what's on the SWF Hotline tonight?
Fool: Well, Chip, it's 1-900-SWF-NEWS. Just $2.49 a minute, and if you listen for 29 minutes,
you get the 30th minute free!
(Mr. Roboto goes for a kick to the midsection, but The Original Gangsta
blocks it.
The Original Gangsta hits a German suplex on Mr. Roboto.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: German suplex and a near fall.
Fool: Tonight, I'll have all the information about a member of The Church of Pain possibly
leaving to join the T.w.O. And Pagan's mystery partner for next week's edition of Around the
World may not be a member of The Church. Call now!
(The Original Gangsta executes a Frankensteiner on Mr. Roboto.
The Original Gangsta is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
The Original Gangsta goes for a reverse neckbreaker, but Mr. Roboto blocks it.
Mr. Roboto places The Original Gangsta on the turnbuckle.
Mr. Roboto hits The Original Gangsta with a double underhook superplex.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: Wow! Roboto with a near fall!
Chip: Wait a minute! That was on MY Hotline report yesterday.
(Mr. Roboto executes a thrust kick to the head on The Original Gangsta.
A small "Mr. Roboto" chant is being started.
Mr. Roboto goes for the Modern Man, but The Original Gangsta counters it with
a duck-down move.
The Original Gangsta runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Roboto with a swinging neckbreaker.)
Fool: Yeah, but since nobody listens to yours, I thought I'd make sure everyone gets to hear
the story.
(The Original Gangsta executes the Gangsta's Paradise on Mr. Roboto.
There are lots of chants for The Original Gangsta.)
Chip: Gangsta's Paradise!
(The Original Gangsta goes for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, thr... kickout.)
Chip: Roboto kicks out! Roboto kicks out! Roboto kicks out!
Fool: I'm stunned.
(The Original Gangsta goes for a snap suplex, but Mr. Roboto blocks it.
Mr. Roboto goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but The Original Gangsta
counters it with a punch.
The Original Gangsta takes Mr. Roboto down with a Frankensteiner from the top rope.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, shoulder up.
The Original Gangsta runs into the ropes.)
Chip: Top rope Frankengangsta!
Fool: Come on, O.G.! Beat the jobber!
(Mr. Roboto and The Original Gangsta get hit with a double clothesline.
Mr. Roboto takes The Original Gangsta down with an earringer.
Mr. Roboto nails The Original Gangsta with a single-leg takedown.
Mr. Roboto nails The Original Gangsta with an enzuilariato.
Mr. Roboto runs into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta misses with a shoulderblock.
The Original Gangsta hits a side suplex on Mr. Roboto.)
Chip: Big side suplex there by the champion.
Fool: It's a matter of time now.
(The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Roboto into the ropes.
The Original Gangsta misses with a clothesline.
Mr. Roboto hits The Original Gangsta with a shoulderblock.
Mr. Roboto goes for an earringer, but The Original Gangsta blocks it.
The Original Gangsta nails Mr. Roboto with a kneebreaker.
The Original Gangsta kicks Mr. Roboto.
Mr. Roboto punches The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta kicks Mr. Roboto.)
Chip: We've heard that the O.n.E. were using their pull to get Roboto a TV Title shot. And he
is putting forth a good effort here against the Original Gangsta.
Fool: Yeah, but I get the feeling that the head Gangsta can put him away any moment.
(The Original Gangsta punches Mr. Roboto.
Mr. Roboto punches The Original Gangsta.
Mr. Roboto is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
The Original Gangsta hits Mr. Roboto.
The crowd is going crazy.
The Original Gangsta takes Mr. Roboto down with a German suplex.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: One, two, NO!
Fool: Heads up, Chip. Coming our way!
(The Original Gangsta throws Mr. Roboto out of the ring.
The Original Gangsta goes through the ropes.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Roboto into the guardrail.
Mr. Roboto is busted wide open.
The Original Gangsta knocks Mr. Roboto into the ringpost.
The crowd is really behind The Original Gangsta.
Jeff Hart counts: 1.)
Chip: A brutal onslaught from the Gangsta.
Fool: Sound instincts. You can't lose the title on the floor.
(The Original Gangsta knocks Mr. Roboto into the ringsteps.
The crowd is really behind The Original Gangsta.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Roboto into the guardrail.
Jeff Hart counts: 2.
The Original Gangsta whips Mr. Roboto into the guardrail.
Jeff Hart counts: 3.
The Original Gangsta takes Mr. Roboto down with a tiger suplex.)
Chip: Tiger suplex! Roboto is down and he's bleeding!
Fool: You realize that Kaneda's the only decent Japanese wrestler in the SWF? That doesn't
speak too well for us.
(Mr. Bone Breaker comes from behind, but Mr. Roboto nails Mr. Bone Breaker.
The Original Gangsta uses a brain buster on Mr. Roboto.
The Original Gangsta reenters the ring.
Mr. Roboto follows him back in.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 5 minutes remaining.
Chip: We are at the five minute mark, and Mr. Roboto is in a world of trouble.
(The Original Gangsta is going for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.)
Fool: I thought he had him!
(The Original Gangsta executes a kneebreaker on Mr. Roboto.
The Original Gangsta uses a backbreaker on Mr. Roboto.
The Original Gangsta has the crowd going wild.
The Original Gangsta executes a Frankensteiner from the top rope on Mr. Roboto.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, three.
The crowd is going crazy.)
Chip: A spectacular move!
Fool: The Gangstas are back! And the O.n.E. still sucks.
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 5:35, and STILL SWF Television Champion, The Original Gangsta!
(Jeff Hart raises the O.G.'s hand in victory as he holds up the TV Title belt.)
Chip: The Original Gangsta is your winner as we go to the Skittles bite-size replay with the
Sportin' Fool, Tim Thorsen.
(Match highlights appear onscreen as The Fool narrates.)
Fool: The what? Brainbuster on the floor. Does no damage to Roboto, since it was only his
head. Textbook backbreaker in the center of the ring. Then O.G. goes up to the turnbuckle and
hits that HurricanGangsta. USA beats Japan again. Your winner is the Original Gangsta!
Chip: Skittles bite-sized candies invite you to taste the rainbow. When we return,
we'll see the Headhunter battle The Wildcard, here on SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
-------------------------------------------------
(Commercial for Skittles, then an ad for this week's SWF Around the World.)
---------------------------------------
Chip: We're back in Grand Rapids, not far from the shores of Lake Michigan, for more SWF
Triumphant Tuesday.
Fool: Why the hell are we here? Did we run out of real cities?
Chip: Over the past ten days, we have heard a war of words between Ricky Watts and The
Headhunter. Now we're set to go with that highly awaited match. Here's Jeff Ayres.
Jeff: The following contest is set for one fall with a thirty minute time limit.
["Aranjuez, mon Amour" begins to play over the sound system]
Fool: Here comes Joe Camel.
Jeff: Introducing first, weighing in at 235 pounds and hailing from Oakland, California, Ricky
"The Wildcard" Watts!
[The lights begin to dim and the entranceway is comes alive with neon
lights. Fireworks begin to explode all around the arena as Ricky appears
in the entranceway. The crowd erupts with boos and cheers as Ricky makes
his way to the ring, Climbing up into the ring, he drops his robe, walks
over to one of the turnbuckles, steps up on the ropes and salutes the
crowd. The crowd goes wild. Ricky continues to go to each corner till he
has addressed the entire arena.]
Chip: The fans appear to appreciate Ricky since he aligned himself with the Justice Department.
Fool: I don't know. He didn't sound like he was with them earlier today.
["Staying Alive" by Wyclef Jean starts to play as the Revolution logo fills the video wall.]
Jeff: And his opponent, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, weighing in at 252
pounds, here is the former SWF Television Champion, The Headhunter!!
[Headhunter walks out through the entrance as red and silver fireworks are launched.
He continues to keep on walking on down the aisle into the ring. The crowd, for the most part,
cheers.]
Fool: This sucks! Where's Kirsten?
Chip: Well, Kirsten is NOT Double H's manager. She's sort of the Revolution spokesperson and
kind of an unofficial mascot. Double H is very protective of her, and does not want her at
ringside during matches.
(The bell rings. They lock up.
The Headhunter whips Ricky Watts into the ropes.
Ricky Watts goes for a flying forearm, but The Headhunter ducks out of the way.
The Headhunter attempts to place Ricky Watts on the turnbuckle, but Ricky Watts
blocks it.
The Headhunter kicks Ricky Watts.
A small "The Headhunter" chant is being started.)
Chip: Ryan Wilson is your referee. I think it's kind of refreshing to have a wrestler who
doesn't believe in using his significant other to interfere in a match.
Fool: You would.
(Ricky Watts chops The Headhunter.
The Headhunter punches Ricky Watts.
A small "The Headhunter" chant is being started.
The Headhunter kicks Ricky Watts.
A small "The Headhunter" chant is being started.
The Headhunter hits a front-layout suplex on Ricky Watts.
The Headhunter hits a faceslam on Ricky Watts.)
Chip: Faceslam, as we see Headhunter on the offensive.
Fool: So, is Wilson back in our fantasy football league this year?
Chip: I'll have to ask him.
(The Headhunter goes for a double underhook piledriver, but Ricky Watts
blocks it.
Ricky Watts runs into the ropes.
Ricky Watts uses a flying forearm on The Headhunter.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.
The Headhunter goes for a dragon suplex, but Ricky Watts counters it with
a backward kick.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a flying forearm.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Two flying forearms and a pair of near falls. Fans, Triumphant Tuesday will be live
from The Ice Palace in Tampa on September 8th. Tickets go on sale this Friday.
Fool: If you arrive at the arena box office before noon, you can meet the X-Ploding Cajun,
Tanner Boyle. Now, THAT's what I call Cajun spiced!
(Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the ropes, but The Headhunter reverses it.
Ricky Watts uses a flying clothesline on The Headhunter.
Ricky Watts is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the ropes.
Ricky Watts goes for a powerslam, but The Headhunter counters it with a lariat.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a DDT.
The crowd is cheering on The Headhunter.
The Headhunter takes Ricky Watts down with a kick to the head.)
Chip: Boot to the head there by Double H. Headhunter has the Number 7 spot in the Run of
Death, while Ricky Watts has the Number 6 spot.
Fool: And Double H eliminated Ricky, which I'm sure he's thinking about.
(The Headhunter executes a jumping side kick on Ricky Watts.
The Headhunter goes for a front-layout suplex, but Ricky Watts blocks it.
Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter with a DDT.
Ricky Watts is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the turnbuckle.
Ricky Watts charges into the corner.
Ricky Watts hits a German suplex on The Headhunter.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Another two count. This Ricky Watts is a house afire!
Fool: Well, The Joker's Wild don't look too bad right now.
(Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the ropes.
Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter with a kick.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a powerslam.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, kickout.
Ricky Watts goes for a Russian legsweep, but The Headhunter counters it with
an elbowsmash.
The Headhunter nails Ricky Watts with a swinging neckbreaker.
A small "The Headhunter" chant is being started.
The Headhunter places Ricky Watts on the turnbuckle.)
Chip: Double H is going up top!
Fool: Looks like the Fried Ricky!
(The Headhunter uses a top-rope DDT on Ricky Watts.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Watts kicks out at two.
Fool: You know, with these two so close to each other in the Run of Death rankings,
they'll probably have to wrestle again at Hostile Takeover.
(The Headhunter goes for a brain buster, but Ricky Watts counters it with
a small package.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.
Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter with a flying clothesline.
The crowd is cheering on Ricky Watts.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a European uppercut.
Ricky Watts is going for the pin.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: More near falls by Watts.
Fool: Someone needs to explain to Wild Thing that you can't pin a guy after a European
uppercut.
(Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the ropes.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a single-leg takedown.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a Russian legsweep.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, kickout.
Ricky Watts hits a punch on The Headhunter.
Ricky Watts runs into the ropes.)
Chip: These two are similar in size, but Double H is more versatile from the top rope.
Fool: Well, Watts is a better submission wrestler. He'd do well to keep it on the mat.
(Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter with a flying forearm.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, shoulder up.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a DDT.
The crowd is cheering on Ricky Watts.
Ricky Watts goes for a slap, but The Headhunter blocks it.
The Headhunter uses a dropkick on Ricky Watts.
The Headhunter goes for a Frankensteiner from the top rope, but Ricky Watts
side-steps and The Headhunter only hits air.
Ricky Watts throws The Headhunter out of the ring.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: That's where a high risk move will backfire on you. Ricky Watts is quick to
take advantage.
(Ricky Watts goes through the ropes.
Ricky Watts uses a snap suplex on The Headhunter.
Ricky Watts executes a flying clothesline on The Headhunter.
The Headhunter is busted wide open.
Ricky Watts goes for a fisherman suplex, but The Headhunter blocks it.
Ryan Wilson counts: 1.
The Headhunter reenters the ring.
Ricky Watts follows him back in.)
Fool: Ah, blood! Hoo-wah!
Chip: They're taking it back into the ring.
(The Headhunter uses a front-layout superplex on Ricky Watts.
The crowd is cheering on The Headhunter.
The Headhunter takes Ricky Watts down with a faceslam.
The Headhunter whips Ricky Watts into the turnbuckle.
The Headhunter charges into the corner.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a faceslam.
The Headhunter is going for the pin.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Faceslam nets a near fall. Here's where the experience of a Double H comes
into play.
Fool: He's going up, Chip.
(The Headhunter uses a Frankensteiner from the top rope on Ricky Watts.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, kickout.
The Headhunter uses a Big Leg Drop on Ricky Watts.
The Headhunter is getting a good reaction from the crowd.
The Headhunter goes for a swinging neckbreaker, but Ricky Watts
counters it with a side suplex.
Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the turnbuckle.
Ricky Watts runs shoulder-first into the corner.
Ricky Watts takes The Headhunter down with a kneebreaker.)
Chip: The Wildcard returns to the mat wrestling.
Fool: He may not be as popular as Headhunter, but he's technically sound.
(Ricky Watts runs into the ropes.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a backdrop.
Ricky Watts falls out of the ring.
The Headhunter goes through the ropes.
The Headhunter hits a brain buster on Ricky Watts.
The Headhunter whips Ricky Watts into the guardrail.
The Headhunter knocks Ricky Watts into the ringsteps.
The Headhunter takes Ricky Watts down with a reverse neckbreaker.)
Chip: Another neckbreaker by the man from Calgary.
Fool: Well, two can play at that game.
(Ryan Wilson counts: 1.
The Headhunter executes a dropkick on Ricky Watts.
Ryan Wilson counts: 2.
The Headhunter executes the Hit on Ricky Watts on the concrete floor.
A small "The Headhunter" chant is being started.
Ricky Watts is out cold.)
Chip: He's out! Headhunter with the Hit!
Fool: Ricky's got big trouble.
(Ryan Wilson counts: 3.
The Headhunter reenters the ring.
Ricky Watts follows him back in.
The Headhunter uses a reverse neckbreaker on Ricky Watts.
The crowd is cheering on The Headhunter.
The Headhunter whips Ricky Watts into the ropes, but Ricky Watts reverses it.
The Headhunter goes for a backspin DDT, but Ricky Watts blocks it.
Ricky Watts runs into the ropes.)
Chip: What a match! This is the kind of great action you only see here in the Supreme
Wrestling Federation.
Fool: You said it. You know, Friday night I was watching this other promotion's
show. They had some guy named "the Equalizer" but it wasn't the real Equalizer.
(The Headhunter goes for a spinebuster slam, but Ricky Watts counters it with
a kneelift.
Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter.
A small "Ricky Watts" chant is being started.
Ricky Watts kicks The Headhunter.
Ricky Watts punches The Headhunter.
A small "Ricky Watts" chant is being started.
Ricky Watts goes for a powerslam, but The Headhunter counters it with a lariat.
The Headhunter yells "That's why I am the best!".)
Fool: And they had some guy named Mr. Shh! but it wasn't the REAL Mr. Shhh. I
think we ought to sue.
Chip: (* sigh *) I'll explain it to you later.
(The crowd is cheering on The Headhunter.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a dropkick.
The Headhunter runs into the ropes.
The Headhunter nails Ricky Watts with a backspin DDT.
The crowd is really behind The Headhunter.
The Headhunter goes for a DDT, but Ricky Watts counters it with a backdrop.
The Headhunter takes Ricky Watts down with a double underhook piledriver.
The Headhunter executes a double underhook piledriver on Ricky Watts.)
Chip: That's The Execution! Sean McKenzie's finisher! And Watts has been tagged
with it twice now!
Fool: Headhunter doesn't have the power of McKenzie, but that was still damn effective.
(The Headhunter has the crowd going wild.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a fisherman suplex.
Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, thr... kickout.)
Chip: Fisherman suplex and...Watts kicked out! Yes he did! Just got the shoulder up!
Fool: He's still reeling though.
(The Headhunter whips Ricky Watts into the ropes, but Ricky Watts reverses it.
The Headhunter misses with a clothesline.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a clothesline.
Ricky Watts falls out of the ring.
The Headhunter goes through the ropes.
The Headhunter goes for a spinebuster slam, but Ricky Watts counters it with
a kneelift.)
Jeff: 10 minutes gone by. There are 20 minutes remaining.
Chip: Watts with the high knee as the action continues out by us.
(Ryan Wilson counts: 1.
Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the guardrail.
Ricky Watts goes for a backspin DDT, but The Headhunter blocks it.
The Headhunter reenters the ring.
Ricky Watts follows him back in.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a spinebuster slam.)
Chip: Spinebuster! And that could be it!
(Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, in the ropes...)
Fool: No! Too close to the ropes.
(The Headhunter goes for a backspin DDT, but Ricky Watts counters it with
a belly-to-belly suplex.
Ricky Watts whips The Headhunter into the ropes.
The Headhunter hits Ricky Watts with a kick.
The Headhunter nails Ricky Watts with a belly-to-back suplex.
The Headhunter nails Ricky Watts with a double underhook piledriver.
The Headhunter has the crowd going wild.)
Chip: Once again, the double underhook.
Fool: Every time Watts starts puttin' stuff together, Hunter just goes off on him.
(The Headhunter runs into the ropes.
Ricky Watts hits The Headhunter with a clothesline.
Ricky Watts executes a kneedrop on The Headhunter.
Ricky Watts locks The Headhunter in a figure-four sleeper.
The Headhunter reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Ricky Watts executes the Joker's Wild on The Headhunter.)
Fool: It's the Gong Show!
Chip: No! It's the Joker's Wild!
(The Headhunter is barely hanging in there.
Chip: Double H can't take much more.
Fool: He's near the ropes.
(The Headhunter reaches the ropes after 26 seconds.
Ricky Watts has the crowd going wild.
Ricky Watts hits a powerslam on The Headhunter.)
Chip: Powerslam! One! Two!
(Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, three.)
Chip: Three! He got him! What a win for Ricky Watts!
Jeff: Here is your winner, in 12:27, Ricky "The Wildcard" Watts!
("Aranjuez, mon Amour" plays as Watts climbs the turnbuckle to salute the fans.)
Fool: Well, let's see. Ricky's probably gonna go celebrate with a good cigarette. I
hear he smokes Virginia Slims.
Chip: You can joke all you want, but this has to be one of the bigger wins of this
young man's career.
Fool: Whatever. You leaving?
(Chip carries the microphone into the ring with him.)
Fool: While Chip goes to handle this intrerview, he asked me to reassure all of you that
while he did meet Monica in April at the pay-per-view, it's not his semen on her dress.
Oh, good. He's ready now.
(Chip Collins is holding the microphone in the center of the ring. Texas Pete and two
security men are setting up a table with the SWF banner on the front.)
Chip: People, if I may have your attention, it's time for the contract signing for one of
our main events at Hostile Takeover. Please welcome at this time, the CEO of the
Microsoft Corporation, from Redmond, Washington, the esteemed William Gates!
("Heroes" by David Bowie plays as the Windows 98 logo appears on the wall monitor.)
Fool: Wow. He really IS here.
(There is a buzz in the arena. Gates enters, flanked by two men who appear to be in their
early forties, all wearing expensive designer suits. The boos are deafening.)
Fool: There's Bill Gates. A guy who can buy and sell all of us a hundred times over. They
have more money than any human being could ever want or need. It makes me sick. By the
way, did I mention that I'm on the hotline tonight until midnight?
Chip: Mr. Gates is accompanied by the president of Microsoft, Steve Ballmer, and
Microsoft's Vice President in charge of interactive media, Pete Higgins.
(Gates takes his seat at the table. The ring is quickly filling up with debris.)
Chip: And now, ladies and gentlemen...
(The SWF logo fills the screen as "Cities on Flame" by Blue Oyster Cult plays. The crowd roars
its approval.)
Chip: It is my distinct pleasure to introduce the President of the Supreme Wrestling Federation,
Brian Frenck!
(Frenck steps through the curtain, flanked by Vice-Presidents Pat McNeill and Tim Parker. All are
wearing jeans and black T-shirts.)
Fool: Look at those shirts!
(From left to right, we can read Tim Parker's shirt, which reads "OS2/Warp". Frenck's T-shirt
features white lettering which reads "DOS 6.22". McNeill's shirt, featuring the Netscape logo,
reads "Communicator 4:05". The crowd roars their approval.)
Fool: I don't think MS GeekBoy appreciates this one little bit.
(A shot of Gates' face reveals that he is not smiling. Frenck, waving to the partisan crowd,
takes his seat at the table opposite Gates. The two men stare each other down. Chip grabs two
identical folders with the SWF logo, handing one to Frenck and the other to Gates.)
Chip: Gentlemen, these are the contract for your match at Hostile Takeover on the 16th in
Seattle. Please take a moment to read them over before signing.
(Frenck opens the contract and signs it. Gates and his men start reading through it.)
Gates: I'd like to have my legal team look at this.
Frenck: Go right ahead.
(Gates waves to the back. Approximately 18 men and two women, all in business suits and
carrying attache cases, make their way down the aisle.)
Fool: I don't believe this.
(The twenty lawyers enter the ring, as they are booed and pelted with small objects by the
rowdy SWF faithful. Gates hands the contract to the first one, and they pass it around.)
Chip: Ah...Mister Gates, we only have an hour program tonight.
(The last lawyer hands the contract back to Gates, whispering something to him. Gates just
smiles and signs the contract.)
Fool: Alright! It's official! There's no weaseling out of this now!
(Gates drops the pen and calls for the microphone. One of his lawyers hands it to him.)
Gates: First of all, I want to remind all of you that I could buy this place and everyone in
it with pocket change...
(The crowd boos.)
Fool: How much would you be paying the announcers?
Gates: ...and I would be doing everyone here a favor. (He points to Frenck.) I can't
believe that hippie boy would drop a ten million dollar lawsuit just to wrestle me once.
That's why Microsoft is the biggest corporation in the world, and the SWF has to
struggle just to make its payroll.
(Gates gives a satisfied smile as the crowd boos. Frenck calls for the microphone.)
Frenck: It's worth it to me, just to be the man who gets to kick your ass!
(A LOUD cheer from the audience. Gates, looking upset, gets up and starts moving
toward Frenck. His attorneys grab on to him and hold him back. Frenck waves him
forward as Chip. McNeill and Parker start to get between him and Gates.)
Fool: We don't have to wait for the 16th! They're ready to go right now!
(SWF Security hits the ring, supplemented by Corporal Punishment, Duke Diamond
and Deaf Leopard of the T.w.O.. The camera gets a tight shot of Gates as the
wrestlers start to pull him back down the aisle.)
Gates: You'll pay for this, Frenck! I'm going to embarass you!
(The crowd is starting a "Let them fight" chant.)
Chip (grabbing the microphone): We've gotta take a break! Go to commercial!
Fool: This sucks. None of the good stuff ever makes it on TV. Oh, well.
(cut to commercial)
------------------------------------
("Run" by Pink Floyd plays as we see Sandman rake Mike Stevens' face against
the cage.)
Voice: There's no other event in wrestling quite like it.
(Clip of a blindfolded Vigilante slamming Coldblooded.)
Voice: The ten toughest wrestlers.
(Clip of Jagged Edge locking the Shattered Dreams on Vigilante.)
Voice: Nine brutal matches.
(Clip of Jagged Edge and Equalizer hitting each other with the bullrope.)
Voice: It's the Run of Death. And you'll only find it in the Supreme Wrestling
Federation.
(Clip of Equalizer and War Machine brawling up the aisle.)
Voice: See it live, only at SWF Hostile Takeover.
(A clip of this year's Battle Royal, as Titan celebrates in the middle of the ring.)
Voice: It's only on pay-per-view, August 16th.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
(We return to the announcer's table, with a look at Tim and a very rumpled Chip Collins.)
Chip: Triumphant Tuesday returns live from the Van Andel Arena in Grand Rapids, Michigan!
Fool: Pro wrestling's highest rated show, each and every Tuesday night!
Chip: Well, this past Sunday night on Slaughterhouse, the newcomer, Titan won the battle royal
and the number 10 slot at the Run of Death.
Fool: Yeah. How come all the guys I don't like made it to the back half of Run of Death? I
mean, you got Titan, McKenzie, Sven. Boring!
Chip: Titan will get his first real test tonight as he meets SWF International Champion The
Judge.
Fool: I'm still rooting for injuries.
Chip: Let's take it up to the ring and Jeff Ayres!
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is a special challenge match, set for one fall.
("Tightrope" by Electric Light Orchestra begins to play.)
Fool: I hate this f[bleep]in' song.
Chip: Fool! Settle down.
Jeff: Introducing first, hailing from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and accompanied to the ring
by Athena, weighing in at 293 pounds, here is Titan!
(Lightning flashes across the video screen as Titan and Athena emerge from the entranceway.
White fireworks go off across the rampway and in the aisle. Titan raises his hands in the
air as the crowd cheers.)
[As Titan enters the ring the music fades and is replaced by "I Shot The
Sheriff" by Eric Clapton]
Fool: Here comes da Judge!
Jeff: And his opponent, being led to the ring
by The Bailiff, from Montreal in the province of Quebec, weighing in at 295
pounds, here is the SWF International Champion, The Judge!!
[The Judge and Bailiff emerge from the entrance. The Judge is wearing the title belt.
The crowd is giving a mixed reaction. Both men ignore the fans as they enter the ring.
One by one, fireworks are launched from each of the ringposts.]
Chip: The Judge has his hands full, as he will defend that title in just twelve days on
pay-per-view against Kaos. Jeff "the Hitman" Hart is your referee...
Fool: Nugget!
Chip: And we're underway!
(The bell rings. They lock up.
The Judge chops Titan.
The Judge is starting to get under the crowd's skin.
The Judge kicks Titan.
The Judge is starting to get under the crowd's skin.
Titan punches The Judge.
Titan hits The Judge.
Titan chops The Judge.)
Chip: Both men are about the same size.
Fool: The crowd really likes this Titan. Damned if I can figure out why.
(The crowd is cheering on Titan.
The Judge hits Titan.
Quite a few boos are audible.
Titan chops The Judge.
Titan uses a thrust kick to the head on The Judge.
Titan is going for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Thrust kick and a near fall. Don't forget that this Thursday on SWF Around the World,
we'll see Titan in a steel cage against Kip Douglass!
Fool: Go, Kipper!
(The crowd is really behind Titan.
Titan hits The Judge with a slingshot.
Titan gets a Boston crab on The Judge.
The Judge reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.
Titan raises his arms and screams.
Titan has the crowd going wild.
Titan locks The Judge in an armlock hammerlock submission.
The Judge reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds.)
Chip: And on a special edition of SWF Slaughterhouse, we'll see the first ever "Beer Match"
between Gods Tears and Doug Bacon.
Fool: Screw the match. They should just have a drinking contest and settle this once and for
all.
(Titan runs into the ropes.
Titan executes a back heel kick on The Judge.
Titan goes for a football tackle, but The Judge counters it with
a kick to the head.
The Judge is going for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: The Judge with a kick and a near fall.
Fool: See, Chip, you're assuming that Kaos is going to survive whatever Pagan has planned for
him on the 13th.
Chip: What IS Pagan planning?
(The Judge nails Titan with a slingshot legdrop.
The Judge attempts to place Titan on the turnbuckle, but Titan blocks it.
The Judge hits Titan with a DDT.
The Judge is starting to get under the crowd's skin.
The Judge goes for the Death Sentence, but Titan counters it with a punch.
Titan uses a thrust kick to the head on The Judge.)
Fool: I can't tell you. That would be betraying the confidence of a stablemate. Besides, he
hasn't told me.
Chip: Cover by Titan!
(The crowd is really behind Titan.
Titan is going for the pin.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.
Titan has the crowd going wild.)
Chip: VERY close to a pinfall there.
Fool: He might be setting up for that Thunderbolt thingy.
(Titan nails The Judge with a slingshot.
Titan raises his arms and screams.
The crowd is really behind Titan.
Titan uses a faceslam on The Judge.
There are lots of chants for Titan.
Titan whips The Judge into the ropes, but The Judge reverses it.
The Judge misses with a clothesline.
Titan hits The Judge with a kick.)
Chip: So far, Titan has been effective against the very powerful International Champion.
Fool: He could win the Run of Death. And then he'd get a shot at anyone he wants.
(Titan goes for a clothesline, but The Judge ducks out of the way.
Titan throws The Judge out of the ring.
Titan goes through the ropes.
Titan whips The Judge into the guardrail.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Titan uses a faceslam on The Judge.)
Chip: Faceslam on the floor!
Fool: When's Hart gonna start counting?
(Jeff Hart counts: 1.
Titan hits a belly-to-belly suplex on The Judge.
Titan reenters the ring.
The Judge follows him back in.
Titan whips The Judge into the ropes.
Titan hits The Judge with a backdrop.
The Judge falls out of the ring.)
Chip: Oh! What a tumble The Judge took!
Fool: He landed on his back, Chip. And Titan's coming out after him.
(Titan goes through the ropes.
Titan raises his arms and screams.
The crowd is really behind Titan.
Titan executes a hiptoss on The Judge.
Jeff Hart counts: 1.
Titan goes for the Thunderbolt, but The Judge counters it with a facerake.)
Chip: Great counter by The Judge.
Fool: He's picking Titan up!
(The Judge uses a Tombstone on Titan.
The Judge goes for the Death Sentence, but Titan counters it with a palm blow.
Titan nails The Judge with an over-the-shoulder stomachbreaker.
Titan throws The Judge back into the ring.
Titan goes for an enzuigiri to the face, but The Judge ducks out of the way.
The Judge whips Titan into the turnbuckle.
The Judge runs shoulder-first into the corner, but Titan lifts his knee.
Titan uses a springboard dropkick on The Judge.)
Chip: The Judge doesn't seem to be able to get untracked.
Fool: Can you imagine how much momentum Titan will have if he pins The Judge?
(Titan goes for a camel clutch, but The Judge blocks it.
The Judge hits Titan with a Soviet suplex.
The Judge whips Titan into the ropes.
The Judge hits Titan with a palm blow.
The Judge executes a power bomb on Titan.
Jeff Hart counts: One, two, shoulder up.)
Chip: Titan kicks out! He kicks out of the power bomb!
Fool: The Judge is no quitter! You gotta give it up!
(The Judge runs into the ropes.
Titan takes The Judge down with a faceslam.)
Jeff: 5 minutes gone by. There are 25 minutes remaining.
Chip: Even though this is a non-title match, you can feel the intensity as we get closer to
Hostile Takeover!
(Titan uses an elbowsmash on The Judge.
Titan whips The Judge into the ropes, but The Judge reverses it.
The Judge nails Titan with a choke slam.
The Judge whips Titan into the ropes.
Titan hits The Judge with an elbow.
Titan executes a power bomb on The Judge.)
Chip: Power Bomb by Titan! The cover!
(Jeff Hart counts: One, two, kickout.)
Fool: Damn! Judge kicks out this time.
(Titan executes a slingshot on The Judge.
Titan goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but The Judge counters it with
a facerake.
The Judge whips Titan into the ropes.
The Bailiff pulls down the top rope.
Titan falls out of the ring.)
Chip: The Bailiff interferes to save his wrestler!
Fool: Hart's calling for the bell.
(Jeff Hart disqualifies The Judge.
You can hear a few scattered fans booing The Judge.)
Jeff: Ladies and gentlemen, referee Jeff Hart has disqualified The Judge for outside
interference at the 6:16 mark. Therefore, your winner is Titan!
(Athena goes over to stand with Titan on the floor. Titan raises his arms and screams
as "Tightrope" begins to play.)
Chip: Well, that didn't settle very much.
Fool: Good strategy by The Judge though. If you have a match like that, which has no impact
on your title, it's best to get it over with soon.
Chip: Titan keeps his momentum heading into the Run of Death. Fans, when we return, we'll have
the Hostile Takeover Control Center, and the abandoned warehouse match! Back after this.
------------------------------------
(Two teenaged boys are sitting in front of their home computer.)
Kid #1: This crummy browser takes forever.
Kid #2: Hey, let's hit the SWF website!
Kid #1: Cool!
(The kid types on his computer. Suddenly, Jagged Edge emerges from the screen,
grabs both kids and pulls them back inside the machine.)
Voice: It's a World Wide War of epic proportions.
(The kids have now entered a giant cyber-world, with SWF wrestlers all around. We see Corporal
Punishment and Monster Mark pummeling each other on a wrestling mat that looks like a giant
Excel spreadsheet.)
Voice: In an atmosphere filled with antitrust violations.
(A shot of God's Tears, who has now applied the Drunken Rage on one of the animated monsters
from the game "Doom".)
Voice: When the various alliances in the Supreme Wrestling Federation do battle, there's gonna
be a major system crash.
(A shot of Tanner Boyle slamming Sven Pieterson through what looks to be a Windows 98 logo.)
Voice: "Hostile Takeover '98: Broken Windows". Live on pay-per-view August 16th.
(The SWF is not affiliated with The Microsoft Corporation or any of its subsidiaries.)
-----------------------------------------
Chip: Welcome back to Triumphant Tuesday. The action has been non-stop all evening.
Fool: Considering we're in Grand Rapids, we're lucky there's any action at all.
Chip: In a moment, we'll go out to the warehouse for our main event. But first, we have some
more news on SWF Hostile Takeover on Pay-per-view!
(The Hostile Takeover logo fills the screen as "Walking Contradiction" by Green Day plays
underneath the footage.)
Fool: SWF Hostile Takeover '98 will take place on Sunday night, August 16th at Key Arena in
Seattle.
(A pull down menu pops up onscreen. The "Run of Death" Tab is selected. We see a digitized
picture of the ten participants in that event, standing in a ginat wrestling ring.)
Chip: We don't yet know the stipulations of any Run of Death matches, but now we know the
participants, so we're halfway there!
(The next key is clicked, and we see the list of seeds for the Run of Death.
#1 Boom-Boom
#2 Hot Shot Donovan
#3 Gods Tears
#4 Kip Douglass
#5 El Cholo
#6 Ricky Watts
#7 Headhunter
#8 Sven Pieterson
#9 Sean McKenzie
#10 Titan )
Fool: Titan obviously has the advantage here. But what happens if Sven loses tonight?
Chip: I don't know, but since he'd be out of the SWF, that lineup would be changed.
(The "Next" key is clicked, and we see a digitized shot of Rock 'n Roll Animal, holding his
new American Title belt, standing opposite a picture of Pagan.)
Chip: Rock 'n Roll Animal won the American Title last week in Sydney in controversial fashion.
But a rematch has been signed between him and the former two-time American Champion, Pagan, at
Hostile Takeover.
Fool: Pagan will win the belt back. I guarantee it.
(The "Return to Main Menu" key is clicked, and we see the entire lineup so far.)
Chip: That's in addition to the matches already signed. Mr. Shhh defends against Doug Bacon
in a steel cage, The Thugz vs. Ground Zero, Bill Gates vs. Brian Frenck, The Judge vs. Kaos,
Biggie Z vs. Artful Dodger and much, much more.
Fool: Seventeen matches total. It's a bargain at twice the price.
(The "shutdown" option is selected, and we return to the announcer's table.)
Fool: let's go wathc the idiots inthe warehouse, and call it a night.
Chip: Dean Obermann is standing by at the abandoned warehouse. Let's go to him.
(Cut to Dean Obermann, looking very nervous, at the warehouse in Walker, Michigan.)
Dean: Well, guys, I've never been a part of anything quite like this. I see broken glass over
in the corner. If you look up on the second floor, you'll see some sort of tool storage area.
Andrew Borgert, our referee, is doing his best to clear some space.
Fool: Can we get the damn match started already, Dean? I want to get back to the hotel in time
for "Baseball Tonight".
Dean: Well, okay. As I said, this match can only be won by pinfall or submission, and is set
for one fall. It is NOT sanctioned by the Supreme Wrestling Federation.
Fool: Then why are we televising it and providing a referee?
Chip: Settle down, Fool.
(The Swedish National Anthem plays on a boom box in the corner.)
Dean: Ah...introducing first, accompanied by Helga, weighing 291 pounds, Sven Pieterson!
(Sven, wearing jeans and a Trinity T-shirt with a black X marked over the logo, emerges from a
side door. The taped music is stopped. Sven starts looking around on the ground for a weapon.)
("Sleep when I'm dead" by Bon Jovi plays.)
Dean: And, ah, his opponent from Parts Unknown, weighing 238 pounds, Mortis!
(We see Mortis streak into the camera shot, wearing his wrestling gear.)
Fool: They set up some kind of video link. The crowd here gets to watch the match on the
monitors, and they're piping the noise into the warehouse.
Chip: Mortis is going to attack Sven from the start!
(Mortis nails Sven Pieterson with a dropkick to the knee.
Sven Pieterson whips Mortis into a trashcan.)
Chip: Oh, my! We're underway!
(Sven Pieterson goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but Mortis counters it with
a punch.
Mortis nails Sven Pieterson with a faceslam.
A small "Mortis" chant is being started back atthe arena.
Mortis poses for the camera.
A small "Mortis" chant is being started.
Mortis tries to climb the stairs.)
Dean: I can see a crowbar and a tire iron up there.
Fool: A great way to start a match!
(Mortis is halfway up the stairs.
Sven Pieterson pulls him back down.
Sven Pieterson uses a DDT on Mortis.
The crowd is starting to get behind Sven Pieterson.
Sven Pieterson goes for a takeover suplex, but Mortis counters it with
a kneelift.
Mortis hits a choke slam on Sven Pieterson.)
Chip: Chokeslam on the concrete! And that took the crowd right out of the match!
Fool: The crowd's not in the match. They're here with us.
(Mortis hits Sven Pieterson with a spinning power bomb.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: That was close.
Fool: We were almost Sven-less.
(Mortis nails Sven Pieterson with a thrust kick to the head.
A few fans are cheering on Mortis.
Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the wall, but Sven Pieterson reverses it.
Mortis hits Sven Pieterson with a shoulderblock.
Mortis throws Sven Pieterson nto a pile of tires.
Mortis goes through the tires.)
Dean: I can't emphasize enough how dangerous this is.
Fool: Shut up, Dean!
(They're brawling on the first floor.
Mortis throws Sven Pieterson over the stairrail.
Mortis hits a spinebuster slam on Sven Pieterson.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: Another near fall by Mortis, and he appears to be gaining confidence.
(Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the assembly line.
They're brawling behind the assembly line.
Mortis goes for a punch, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.
Sven Pieterson nails Mortis with a fallaway slam.
Sven Pieterson is going for the pin.)
Fool: Get that camera over there!
Chip: The cover!
(Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.)
Chip: No! Mortis survives!
(Sven Pieterson goes for a belly-to-back suplex, but Mortis blocks it.
Mortis goes for a Russian legsweep, but Sven Pieterson counters it with
an elbowsmash.
Sven Pieterson whips Mortis into a pile of boxes.
Sven Pieterson hits Mortis with a cardboard box.
They're brawling through the cardboard boxes.
Sven Pieterson chokes Mortis with a cardboard box.
Helga comes from behind, but Mortis nails Helga.)
Fool: Mortis just knocked down Sven's woman!
Chip: Sven's taking Mortis for the ride!
(Sven Pieterson hits Mortis with a double underhook suplex.
A small "Sven Pieterson" chant is being started.
Sven Pieterson uses a tilt-a-whirl suplex on Mortis.
Sven Pieterson claps.
A small "Sven Pieterson" chant is being started.
Sven Pieterson whips Mortis into the far wall.)
Fool: He should be gojng for the pin!
Chip; He's setting for the DDT! This will end it!
(Sven Pieterson goes for a DDT, but Mortis counters it with a low blow.
They're brawling through the warehouse.
Helga comes from behind, but Mortis pushes Helga away.)
Fool: I guess he didn't feel like slapping her.
(They're brawling through some used car parts.
Sven Pieterson executes a gutwrench suplex on Mortis.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.
They're brawling toward the stairwell.
Helga comes from behind, but Mortis nails Helga.
They're brawling up the stairs.)
Chip: I literally cannot believe what I'm watching.
Fool: They'll feel this in the morning.
(Sven Pieterson whips Mortis over the rail down to the first floor.
Sven Pieterson claps.
A small "Sven Pieterson" chant is being started.
Sven Pieterson goes for the Swedish Slam, but Mortis counters it with
a vertical suplex.
Mortis hits Sven Pieterson with a rana.)
Chip: What a move!
Fool: There's no way! Goodbye, Swedish Meatball!
(Andrew Borgert counts: One, two,...)
Chip: One! Two!
(...thr... kickout.)
Chip: Two and a half!
Fool; We could be here all night!
(Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the wall.
They're brawling through the stockroom.
Sven Pieterson goes for a double underhook suplex, but Mortis blocks it.
Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the shelving.)
Dean: Oh, my! Air filters flying everywhere!
Fool: I thought I told you to shut up?
(Mortis takes Sven Pieterson down with a spinebuster slam.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.
Sven Pieterson is busted wide open.)
Chip: Another near fall. Sven is bleeding now!
Fool: At least this isn't a total waste.
(They're brawling inside the loading dock.
Mortis throws Sven Pieterson over the wooden palettes.
Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the wall.
They're brawling behind the palettes.
Sven Pieterson uses a fallaway slam on Mortis.)
Chip: Fall away slam! Sven goes for the cover again!
(Sven Pieterson is going for the pin.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, kickout.
The crowd is cheering on Sven Pieterson.)
Fool: You can't hurt the dead guy, Sven.
(Mortis whips Sven Pieterson into the connecting door.
They're brawling inside the warehouse.
(We suddenly see Pagan enter the shot. He is wearing street clothes, standing behind Mortis.)
Dean: Look! It's Pagan! How'd he get in here?
(Mortis goes for a sleeperhold, but Sven Pieterson blocks it.)
Chip: Mortis sees him now!
(Mortis turns to face Pagan.
Sven Pieterson hits Mortis with a broom handle.
Sven Pieterson executes the Swedish Slam on Mortis on the pile of tires.)
Chip: Swedish Slam! Swedish Slam!
(Sven Pieterson goes for the pin.
Andrew Borgert counts: One, two, three.
A small "Sven Pieterson" chant is being started.)
Chip: Sven Pieterson has defeated Pagan!
Fool: I don't believe this! Do you think Sven could be Pagan's mystery partner?
Chip: I don't know!
(The shot cuts back to the arena, where the fans are beginning to file out.)
Chip: Well, what a night it's been. Next week, we're in Auburn Hills, and I'm told we'll
have a six-man tag between The Church of Pain and The Justice Department.
Fool: Whoa! Biggie and Judge are gonna have to enter the Witness Protection Program after
that one!
Chip: We'll see you then. Don't miss it!
Chip & Fool: Be there!
(We see a shot of Bill Gates' limo pulling out of the parking lot as we fade to black.)
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c) 1998 SWF Triumphant Tuesday.
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