ADORA: You are now walking down a dirt road; there’s some trees next to you, you hear songbirds, you know, tweet tweet, and a squirrel runs across your path.

SYMRAN: Can I throw a fireball at the squirrel?

ADORA: No, you may not throw a fireball at the squirrel.

NORSHA: See, this is exactly what we’re trying to avoid, Nick.

ADORA: Anyway…so, it’s a dirt road, pretty boring, but in the far distance you see the town, so do you wish to walk faster?

ALL: Sure, yes, yes.

NORSHA: I do not speed up. I walk at the same pace I am walking.

YALLI: I’m marching.

NORSHA: Wait a second. I’m the scout. I’m already at the city.

ADORA: Noooooo…

YALLI: So make up your mind; either you’re going—

MORRIS: So you run at light speed and meet us at the city wall.

ADORA: OK, OK, so…

NORSHA: But no, I’m the scout.

YALLI: All riiiiight…

ADORA: We understand you are the scout, yes. You’re ahead of the party. Norsha, you are at the city walls, but the others are behind you.

SYMRAN: How far?

ADORA: About fifteen, twenty feet.

SYMRAN: Can we see her?

ADORA: You can’t see her.

SYMRAN: I’m not walking any faster.

ADORA: OK. Any of you wish to do anything before I tell Sharon what’s going on?

MORRIS: I reach down to tie my shoe. And I fall over and hit my head. It really hurts.

NORSHA: See? Again! that’s the thing we’re not going to mention. It takes up time.

MORRIS: You interrupted me. I wasn’t finished. And I get knocked out.

FORGE: Oh good. Then don’t talk for the rest of the game.

MORRIS: I don’t get knocked out that long.

NORSHA: Leave them in the road.

YALLI: I resuscitated him with CPR.

ADORA: Thank you.

MORRIS: That was very polite of you.

FORGE: He was just knocked out. He wasn’t dead.

NORSHA: He was unconscious; he wasn’t dead.

ADORA: Moving on. You’re now at the city. You guys have said so. And, because the fact is, I’m assuming that Norsha will tell you guys about what’s going on in the city, even you guys are already there. As you enter the town, you see a row of buildings on either side of you, and at the far end of the town, you see a large building with a mass of people crowding the area in front. To your left, the row of buildings contains, in this order (it’s a nice little row), a general store, and inn, and a nameless building. To your right, there is a weapon shop, an armor shop, and a tavern. And there are some people walking about the town, a nice young lady with a lovely purse, hint hint, thief, ahem. I’m sorry. You—

NORSHA: I was already going to rob the armory. I need a couple more weapons; all I have is a blackjack. I need to get myself some knives and some throwing blades and—

SYMRAN: Just checking: I can’t harass the shopkeeper again, can I?

ADORA: No harassing shopkeepers.

STRIDER: Can I cast confusion in the store and steal weapons while they’re running around like chickens with their heads cut off?

NORSHA: What do you need?

ADORA: NO!

NORSHA: BJ, what do you need?

MORRIS: You cast confusion, which is a distraction, while her, she can steal weapons.

STRIDER: OK.

MORRIS: And butter and syrup. I’ll need some of that. It’s for my magical waffle—

ADORA: Are you guys planning to steal stuff from this nice little town?

FORGE: Yes.

NORSHA: Well, I was only going to steal a couple of things, and maybe something for BJ.

MORRIS: Nice little towns have much less security—

SYMRAN: How about I light the armory on fire and then let everybody steal things in the confusion, saving him the trouble of casting it?

ADORA: The minute you steal something—

NORSHA: Because that’s going to kill some people, you idiot!

SYMRAN: Yeah, so?

NORSHA: I’m not an assassin, I’m a thief!

MORRIS: We don’t want to kill him.

STRIDER: We don’t want to kill them, we just want them to walk into the wall a couple times.

FORGE: Oh, a thief with morals. That’s new.

ADORA: If any of you does anything immoral, I will give you Dark Points.

NORSHA: Whose morals?

ADORA: My morals!

NORSHA: - - - -! I can’t do anything!

ADORA: Funny. You may thieve from walking by people and take some coins or something, but no massive thievery of massive shops, OK?

SYMRAN: Do I get Dark Points for harassing shopkeepers?

NORSHA: It’s not a massive shop, it’s a little shop, and I need some knives.

ADORA: Then buy them!

NORSHA: I don’t have any money.

ADORA: Yes, you—

MORRIS: Steal some money. Steal money from the lady with the lovely purse.

NORSHA: I am not a pickpocket! I am a professional thief! I refuse to dignify myself by—

FORGE: Dignify?

NORSHA: Indignify!

ADORA: You see, this is the kind of stuff that happens all the time.

FORGE: OK, what is it with people hitting me today?

ADORA: Now that all the chaos is over, what do you guys want to do? Well, we’ll go in order. Norsha—we’ll just go around in a circle, so Norsha, Forge…

SYMRAN: Symnran.

ADORA: Symran, Morris, Strider, and Yalli. Anyway, in order, let’s go. Norsha?

NORSHA: I’m going to go to the armory and see what kind of weapons they have. What kind of weapons do they have, oh mighty game master?

ADORA: Well, you have to wait a second, because I have to go to the other people to see where they want to go. They’re all really going at once. Why don’t you go?

FORGE: I want to go to the weapons shop.

ADORA: Weapon shop…

SYMRAN: I’m going to flag down passing citizens and try to find out if there’s a magic store or guild in this city,

ADORA: A wandering man: "Hello, what do you want?"

SYMRAN: I want to know if there is some form of magic guild in this city.

ADORA: "Magic? Nope, there be no magic in this town. Nope, nope, none of that." He strolls away.

SYMRAN: I resist the urge to flip him off.

ADORA: Morris?

NORSHA: I don’t!

MORRIS: Do I have any money?

ADORA: You have two hundred gold pieces—ahh, one hundred, sorry.

MORRIS: OK, and do you have a picture of the town?

ADORA: Do I have a picture of the town?

MORRIS: OK, I see there’s a bunch of people striking down at city hall, and to try to calm the…to try to keep the peace, me being the great wonderful priest that I am, -cough cough- I plan to go to city hall and find out what all the commotion’s about.

ADORA: OK, and Strider?

STRIDER: I see people rioting. What if I cast confusion into the middle of the crowd?

ADORA: I’ll give you a Dark Point, that’s what’ll happen.

STRIDER: All right, then I’ll just go into the armor shop with—

NORSHA: It’s worth it, BJ, go for it!

SYMRAN: Well, if he casts confusion, I cast a couple fireballs.

STRIDER: That would kill people.

ADORA: You’re not here to kill people.

SYMRAN: We aren’t?

STRIDER: I keep saying, I don’t want to kill people, I just want to make them run into the wall a couple times.

SYMRAN: That’s why I’d aim for the outskirts, so it just panics them.

ADORA: None of that.

YALLI: My turn!

STRIDER: OK, I’m just going to head for the armory.

YALLI: I’m Yalli, I’m the human warrior. Don’t I have a leader who I have to follow their commands?

ADORA: Actually…

NORSHA: Yes. You follow my commands.

ADORA: Being a—

YALLI: Sorry I asked.

SYMRAN: Something’s wrong with this picture: we’re all following a thief.

YALLI: Who’s my commander?

ADORA: Actually, you’re a rogue warrior.

YALLI: Oh, oh good. In that case, I want to go into the tavern and just get a feel for the community here.

ADORA: OK. First of all, you two, Strider, Norsha, this is what's in the armory. I don't care if you guys listen up, or whatever. Anyway—

SYMRAN: She's in the weapon shop.

NORSHA: The armory is the weapon shop.

ADORA: I have an armor shop and a weapon shop.

NORSHA: The armor shop is not called the armory.

SYMRAN: It is in here!

NORSHA: That's not what an armory is. The armory is where they keep weapons.

FORGE: Where you get arms.

SYMRAN: Don't argue with the DM.

ADORA: Whatever. OK.

NORSHA: She's not a DM!

SYMRAN: She's god with a lowercase "g".

ADORA: Never mind! Fine. Forge, Norsha, and Strider are all in the weapon shop, or armory, as they call it.

NORSHA: Actually, it's a place where you get both weapons and armor. I can see the confusion.

SYMRAN: Shut up.

MORRIS: They're connected.

ADORA: Yeah. The two stores are connected by a little thing.

MORRIS: It's the same bloody store.

ADORA: Moving on. In the weapons/armor shop, one side has weapons and one side has armor. And there's a couple axes, ahem, axes

NORSHA: You can be a little bit more subtle.

ADORA: OK, fine. Subtle it is.

YALLI: Did you mark on that paper?

ADORA: He was fixing my picture.

YALLI: Sorry.

ADORA: PART TWO.

STRIDER: Yay!

SYMRAN: Dun-dun-dunnnn…

ADORA: We're recording now, OK?

SYMRAN: Yes, I know.

NORSHA: I wish to go into the weapons shop and see what selection they have.

STRIDER: I want to go rile up some protesters with—

ADORA: Enough of that!

MORRIS: It's Sharon's turn right now.

NORSHA: Really?

ADORA: Actually, yeah it is. April, or, uh, Forge, has left the weapon shop. She bumps into you on the way out and leaves. You do not see her, where she goes…

NORSHA: I'm going to grab her arm and ask her about the quality of the weapons.

ADORA: She just grumbles something and walks away.

NORSHA: I go into the weapon shop and examine the quality of the weapons, which I can do, because as a thief, I can see things and I can tell the quality of a whole bunch of crap.

SYMRAN: Appraisal.

NORSHA: Appraisal. That's it.

ADORA: You have appraisal skills, I guess,

SYMRAN: Writing new skills to Adora's campaign.

ADORA: So, there's a large sword, a smaller sword, and an even smaller sword, all lined up on a wall. On the other side, there's a bow, a smaller bow, and an even smaller bow, all lined up on the side.

SYMRAN: I sense a pattern

NORSHA: Are there any throwing daggers?

ADORA: There's some knives behind the shopkeeper.

MORRIS: Are there any arrows for that sword? Are there any arrows for that sword, or is she just supposed to chuck the swords?

NORSHA: Arrows for the bow.

ADORA: Arrows for the sword?

SYMRAN: My sword can shoot arrows!

NORSHA: He meant arrows for the bow. There are throwing daggers behind the shopkeeper? What other kinds of weapons are there?

ADORA: There's an ax way above the throwing daggers. There's a nice little shelf of throwing daggers—

NORSHA: Are there blow darts?

ADORA: No.

NORSHA: Are there any blow guns?

ADORA: No!

NORSHA: Are there crossbows?

ADORA: No.

NORSHA: What a crappy weapon shop; I'm going to the armory.

SYMRAN: Isn't that your turn?

NORSHA: Yes, that's probably my turn. I'm going to head over to the armory.

MORRIS: We just had a giant argument this and you ended up saying that an armory is a store of weapons.

NORSHA: An armory is where you store both weapons and armor.

ADORA: Same deal, you're going to the armor part of the shop. Strider, it be your turn.

STRIDER: I'm going to go see what all the fuss is about. I'm going to see what all the fuss is about down there.

ADORA: OK. Down where?

STRIDER: Down by the end of the street.

ADORA: End of the street? OK. The end of the street. There is a long line of people leading out from city hall. One by one you see people coming out, shoulders all hunched and like "Yahhh…." They look like they just heard a lecture from my history teacher.

SYMRAN: All of a sudden walks in Miss Mitchell!

ADORA: No, no, no. I hope not.

SYMRAN: So even the mighty god with a lowercase "g" is afraid of somebody.

AROA: Quiet, you! Moving on, Strider, what would you like to do?

STRIDER: Ask them what they're all upset about or hunched over about.

ADORA: Last person in line hears you, because you're standing there.

ADORA: The guy who's last in line, he looks at you and he goes: "Hey! What do you want?"

STRIDER: And I say, "What's going on here?"

ADORA: "We're just standing in line. We're waiting for our claims, you see." He pulls out a piece of paper and it says "DEED" in large, block font letters.

STRIDER: Deed? What's this deed to?

MORRIS: It's a D Ticket for Disneyland. You know, "it's a small world"?

ADORA: No, no, no, listen! "It is the deed for claims up on the river. This is mine!" He clutches the deed.

STRIDER: OK, I'm going to see if I can get some people riled up.

ADORA: "Nope, no, you won't get any people riled up here." Anyway, that's the end of your turn. Symran?

SYMRAN: I am going to go peer about the nameless shop or building.

ADORA: The nameless building has a window, amazingly enough.

SYMRAN: OK, I'm going to peer into the window.

ADORA: In the window, it's all flashy colored and there's jewelry about. It seems to look like a jewelry shop.

SYMRAN: OK, I'm going to stroll in the door.

ADORA: Shopkeeper's a nice young lady. "Hello, what would you like today?"

SYMRAN: I'm going to ask—I'm going to ask what this place sells.

ADORA: "We sell amulets, trinkets, and all sorts of jewelry."

SYMRAN: Then I ask why the shop is nameless.

ADORA: Hmm. "Well, actually, there's no man around to put the sign up, so we didn't bother."

SYMRAN: Well, if it's nameless, does it have a name?

ADORA: "Amy's Jewelry Shop? I don't know."

STRIDER: Amy's Amulets.

SYMRAN: Well, do you have anything that's enchanted?

ADORA: "Yes, we have a special stone, but it costs one hundred G…one hundred gold pieces."

SYMRAN: What does it do?

ADORA: "It protects you from…from bats, rats, and slimes."

MORRIS: What?

SYMRAN: I sense something like that's going to happen in the future. I think I'll buy it.

ADORA: "OK. That'll be one hundred gold pieces, boy."

SYMRAN: And the one hundred gold pieces.

ADORA: "OK, now. Thank you. Have fun."

SYMRAN: Then I start walking out, resisting the urge to torch the place.

ADORA: OK. Yalli! It is your turn.

YALLI: I think I want to go up by the river and take a look at this property that these people have a deed to. That they claim to have a deed to.

ADORA: Here's the rule, you guys: whatever you hear from someone else, when I tell someone else something, pretend you didn't hear it. I know it's really hard, and in a normal role-playing game, I would take you out to a different room. OK? I can't really show you, but here's a map, as you see. Hey hey! Here's the river, and there are some claims here that I haven't drawn yet, but they are there. You see some people mining…

SYMRAN: Mining see people!

ADORA: …mining for gold or something like that. Let's see. There is a large mine to your right and there is a large sign saying "Closed. HAUNTED!" There is a river running to your left and many prospectors to the upper left of you. What do you want to do?

YALLI: I want to look inside and see what I can see inside that cave that says "Closed.".

ADORA: It is boarded up. There is a little sliver of opening that you can see in and it's pitch black dark. From the far, far end of the cave you hear a "whooooo" sound. So. And you're on your own right now, so…

YALLI: OK.

ADORA: If you want to go in there, be my guest.

YALLI: I decide not to go in there.

ADORA: Wise choice.

MORRIS: There might be random asteroids in there.

SYMRAN: Let it be known that Yalli is not stupid.

YALLI: I'm going to go look for Norsha.

ADORA: OK. And that's the end of your turn.

MORRIS: Ooh, it's my turn.

ADORA: Yes.

MORRIS: Yay!

ADORA: Yes, uhh, Morris.

MORRIS: First thing I'm going to do is see if there are any sort of eateries about the town.

ADORA: Eateries?

MORRIS: Eateries.

SYMRAN: Tavern!

ADORA: There is a tavern.

MORRIS: Oh. OK.

ADORA: And an inn.

MORRIS: OK, Morris goes to the tavern.

ADORA: The tavern's full of burly men enjoying a drink. One of them boasts about finding three hundred pieces of gold in the river. The tavern keeper tells you that a gold rush is happening in the river and the end of town. He just plainly told you that.

MORRIS: OK…OK. Morris looks at everyone in all their drunken debauchery and shouts, "You sinners!" After failing to get a response he gives up and gets himself a beer.

ADORA: OK, OK. Beer costs ten gold pieces.

MORRIS: Oh, umm, Morris says, "I'm sorry, I can't drink. That's a sin." I sneak…I sit there eating free bar peanuts the entire time.

ADORA: While you're eating free bar peanuts—

MORRIS: I'm allergic to peanuts!

ADORA: While you're eating bar peanuts and throwing up at the same time, you over hear this conversation: "Hey, did you hear about the mysterious person?" "No, I didn't hear about the mysterious person. What are you talking about?" "You know, the ghost?" "What ghost?" "The one in the mine." "What mine?" "Never mind." That's what you overhear.

SYMRAN: Adora, you don't have to bother with the hand gestures, the tape recorder doesn't see them.

MORRIS: I smell exorcism! Let's go!

NORSHA: Not till I've stolen—robbed these people blind.

SYMRAN: And I've torched a few buildings.

STRIDER: And I've riled up the people.

SYMRAN: Just to show them that we are not a good party.

MORRIS: Morris is not the most moral priest on the face of the planet.

NORSHA: I still have morals.

SYMRAN: You just robbed them blind.

NORSHA: Yes, but the thing is I don't see anything wrong with it.

ADORA: OK, moving on, moving on. Now—

SYMRAN: Life is a matter of perspective.

ADORA: Do you guys wish to gather back together in one group now?

YALLI: Yes.

STRIDER: Yes.

MORRIS: Yes.

ADORA: BJ, Sharon. Do you guys think we should gather back in one group?

SYMRAN: I'm going to have to find something to kill soon, because I'm really having to resist the urge to torch something. That includes people.

ADORA: Quiet, quiet, quiet. Ahem! The five of you have rejoined—

NORSHA: No, we haven't. I did not agree to rejoin.

ADORA: The four of you—

STRIDER: Let's ditch the thief!

ADORA: Strider, Symran, Morris, and Yalli have regrouped—listen!

NORSHA: I would like to look in the armor shop.

ADORA: QUIET! Can I go?

SYMRAN: Everybody shut up.

MORRIS: Silence!

ADORA: OK, look. You guys—you four have regrouped in the middle, in the city plaza area.

SYMRAN: In the city plaza.

ADORA: Which I haven't drawn yet, but anyway…you four, sit tight. Norsha, what do you want to do?

NORSHA: I want to go to the armor shop.

ADORA: OK, the armor shop has armor.

NORSHA: Do they have any braces for your forearms?

ADORA: No. They have gauntlets, but no braces.

NORSHA: I rob the guy blind and go out to rejoin the group because they don't have any good things.

SYMRAN: And Norsha struggles to keep a straight face.

MORRIS: Remember, all that armor is pretty bloody heavy.

ADORA: Yeah, you can't rob the guy blind.

NORSHA: I'm going to rob him of his money.

MORRIS: Oh.

ADORA: First of all, you gotta roll for that.

NORSHA: I'll just blackjack the - - - - - - -.

ADORA: Yeah, but he'd see you. He's looking right at you.

MORRIS: This is going to IB.

ADORA: You are the only customer in there right now.

NORSHA: I just said - - - - - - -. Should we erase that?

ADORA: It's OK, whatever. He is watching you.

NORSHA: Is there stuff behind him?

ADORA: There's nothing behind him.

NORSHA: There's nothing behind him? Can the other armor dude see me?

SYMRAN: They're the same guy.

NORSHA: It's the same guy?

ADORA: You notice that the armor guy is counting his money and there is a doorway behind…to the side of the shop.

NORSHA: I'm going to go back to the weapon shop and run behind him—

ADORA: You hear the door slamming shut as you walk outside to the other shop. Well?

NORSHA: OK, I'm going to go into the weapon shop, ask him to get me something from the daggers behind him, then I'm going to blackjack him when his back's turned.

ADORA: Here you go.

MORRIS: She blackjacks him.

ADORA: You need to roll—what is that, three dice? You need to roll ten or higher.

NORSHA: Ten or higher. Aha! I got it.

SYMRAN: She got it, all right.

STRIDER: She killed the poor guy.

ADORA: No, no, no. You blackjack the weapon/armor shopkeeper and he knocks unconscious.

MORRIS: He knocks unconscious?

ADORA: He falls down unconscious. That's what I meant.

STRIDER: You should hide him in the mine.

NORSHA: Why?

ADORA: Why?

SYMRAN: He's going to wake up.

STRIDER: He's going to wake up.

SYMRAN: He's going to be pissed! He's going to know who hit him.

ADORA: Forget it, forget it, forget it, OK?

NORSHA: OK, I'm going to rob him blind, and then I'm going to go back to the armor shop and rob that store blind, too.

ADORA: There's no cash here, no little cash register thing, you know. It's just—

NORSHA: Yeah, well, they should have a box.

MORRIS: I know what you should do with the unconscious guy.

NORSHA: OK, well, fine. I'll check the body.

ADORA: There's a nice little bag full of gold pieces.

NORSHA: I take the bag filled with gold pieces.

ADORA: OK.

NORSHA: Then I'm going to search the hallway between stores to see if he has anything hidden there.

ADORA: Nothing.

NORSHA: You sure?

ADORA: I am sure.

SYMRAN: Can Symran take this opportunity to stroll in?

ADORA: No!

NORSHA: I'm going to take this opportunity to relieve the shopkeeper of some throwing knives.

ADORA: You take two throwing knives. Good for you. OK.

MORRIS: Wait!

NORSHA: I'm taking more than two.

ADORA: There's only two in the shop!

NORSHA: - - - -, this guy is poor.

MORRIS: I know what Sharon should do with the shopkeeper. Take the shopkeeper, drag him to the tavern, set him up at a table, and put a glass of strong alcohol next to his hand, so he wakes up and thinks it's just a hangover.

NORSHA: OK, I'll do that.

SYMRAN: Aw, geez, we are cruel, we are cruel and unusual.

ADORA: As you drag the body down from the weapon shop, the other four see you.

NORSHA: Yeah, OK. And you're going to help me, right?

ADORA: Are you going to help her drag the body to the tavern?

MORRIS: Absolutely not. I want to go exorcise that mine!

ADORA: All right, hold on. You two stay—Yalli—

SYMRAN: I'm going to wander into the weapon shop and see if I can relieve him of a quarter-staff.

ADORA: No.

SYMRAN: OK, in that case…

MORRIS: Everything else is chained down.

NORSHA: I'm going to sell it back to him later.

SYMRAN: In that case, I'm going to follow Norsha, smirking, barely withholding a chuckle at times.

ADORA: Great. Strider?

STRIDER: Chuckle. I'll help her…I'm going to help Sharon drag the dead body, er, unconscious body.

ADORA: All right.

MORRIS: I'm going to stand in the middle of the road, watching them drag off a seemingly-dead body and deciding to not get involved.

ADORA: All right. OK, I have some news for you. Forge has left the group. She seems to have deserted you guys. Ha ha.

SYMRAN: No, look, she's returning.

ADORA: No…

MORRIS: Look, there are her feet, sticking out of the bottom of a random asteroid.

YALLI: That's what happened to her.

ADORA: OK, well, now that she's supposedly dead by the random asteroid, OK.

MORRIS: Slain.

ADORA: Slain, whatever. OK. Now, Norsha and Strider are dragging a seemingly-dead body with Yalli to the tavern. OK. The other two are following. Right? Are you following her, or…?

MORRIS: Oh, um, I'll just go wherever everyone else is.

ADORA: OK. So you follow the crowd. You guys walk into the tavern and everyone looks at you because they think you're carrying a dead body.

STRIDER: I want to say something: It's OK, he just had a bit too much to drink, we're just going to drop him off here.

ADORA: The burly man at one of the tables says, "Ah. OK." Everyone turns back and continues to drink.

SYMRAN: I smack Strider upside the head and whisper to him, "He wasn't at the tavern before. How did he get drunk?

MORRIS: They serve alcohol in other establishments.

STRIDER: I respond by saying, "Hey, they bought it."

ADORA: Ah, it is true. They did buy it. So—

NORSHA: I smacked him upside the head for smacking him.

MORRIS: I buy a severely alcoholic drink and set it in the unconscious man's hand.

STRIDER: Black Russian, but I don't think they'd sell it.

NORSHA: Whiskey.

STRIDER: Whiskey.

ADORA: Whatever.

NORSHA: Pour a little bit down the front of his shirt, too, just to be on the safe side.

ADORA: OK. Did you guys get the man into position and…

STRIDER: Yes.

NORSHA: We're putting him in the position of—

ADORA: He begins to stir.

MORRIS: Run away!

STRIDER: Whatever. What we do is we take the man into the bathroom and we place him over the toilet. We put a…

MORRIS: He is beginning to stir.

ADORA: Now!

STRIDER: OK, put him over the toilet, put an extremely—

NORSHA: No!

ADORA: No, we do not have time! He is stirring now!

STRIDER: OK, fine, we'll run away!

MORRIS: Exactly!

ADORA: All five of you run away, right?

SYMRAN: Who goes to go follow him into the bathroom?

ADORA: We're not going to go into the bathroom! Strider was kidding, Strider was kidding.

MORRIS: We never went into the bathroom. That was a stupid idea of his.

NORSHA: Actually, a stupid idea of mine.

MORRIS: Quit having stupid ideas, all of you.

ADORA: Stop it! All right. You guys are outside now.

MORRIS: We are outside.

ADORA: You are outside now, OK?

NORSHA: Now I want to go harass the picketers.

MORRIS: Picketers?

ADORA: OK. Since you're the group leader, Norsha, you said you want to harass the picketers, or whatever. Right?

NORSHA: No, wait, I'm going to ask, "Hey, Yalli, what did you do?"

ADORA: Yes, what did you do, Yalli? Your group would like to know.

YALLI: What did I do when…

MORRIS: Tell us, Daphne-Claire!

YALLI: I thought I helped you drag this guy.

ADORA: Before that. Before you guys regrouped.

YALLI: Oh, what did I do? I didn't get a turn yesterday.

NORSHA: Yes you did.

YALLI: Oh, yesterday I went to the river. And the today…

ADORA: Yesterday you went to the river.

YALLI: Yeah, to look at…I looked at the cave, and I heard a strange noise.

NORSHA: What cave?

YALLI: The cave that was all blocked off.

NORSHA: By the river?

YALLI: Boarded up. The cave by the river, yes, that was boarded up.

NORSHA: What was by the river?

MORRIS: Water.

YALLI: A bridge over the water.

NORSHA: Were there people by the river?

YALLI: Yes.

NORSHA: Were there people mining by the river?

YALLI: Prospectors were mining by the river.

ADORA: OK. Now that you have gained this wonderful information from Yalli, what would you like to do? Yes, Symran?

SYMRAN: I would like to go see if I can talk to whoever leads this town. Find out what the heck is going on. Because I have a faint idea, but I'd like a better one.

ADORA: OK. Like I said before,well, I only said that to Yalli, but there is a rather long line coming from the city hall. If you want to get in you're going to have to bust some heads.

NORSHA: Is the leader of the town rich?

ADORA: The leader of the town is mayor.

NORSHA: Is he rich?

ADORA: Supposedly. I mean, city hall is pretty big.

SYMRAN: I'm going to wait outside where the group is. They can follow me. If they do not follow me in a couple minutes, I'm just going to start striding past the long line.

ADORA: OK.

NORSHA: I'm going to ignore Nick and go right to the hall.

MORRIS: I'm going to break through the crowd using manipulative religious powers. Stay back, or the gods of doom will fry you into crisps!

NORSHA: Crisps?

MORRIS: Crisps.

ADORA: OK. The people in line look at you with a malicious look.

SYMRAN: Glint.

NORSHA: Hey, he's providing instructions.

MORRIS: Providing what?

ADORA: They all crowd around you and say, "Hey! Who do you think you are?"

MORRIS: I am a priest. And on top of that, I am a Doctor of Thinkology!

ADORA: The people in the line go, "Ha ha ha! Thinkology doesn't exist. We think."

MORRIS: I show them a certificate, and they buy it.

ADORA: Only I get to say if they buy it or not.

MORRIS: I show them the certificate, and it looks pretty darn official.

ADORA: Well, since this is a role-playing game, we're going to roll some dice here.

SYMRAN: This is what, the second time?

YALLI: The second time.

ADORA: Give me a break. OK, let's see here. Ten or higher, they buy it.

MORRIS: Ten or higher.

ADORA: Seven. No, eight. They look at it and say, "Aww, no, we think that's fake. None for you, go away." They push you out from the line.

MORRIS: I beat one over the head.

SYMRAN: I believe—Morris, is it?—I believe his turn is over.

ADORA: OK. Morris has thwacked one over the head.

MORRIS: Where's my staff? My staff?

ADORA: It's in your back.

MORRIS: It's in my back?

ADORA: It's slung across your back.

NORSHA: Pull it and go thwack.

MORRIS: OK, I pull it and go whack. I mean, that's 1D.

ADORA: OK, wait, first of all, that's the end of your turn. Yalli hasn't done anything yet. Would you like to do something? Because right now, Morris is causing a distraction, and Norsha, Symran, and Strider are trying to sneak into the city hall.

NORSHA: We're not trying to sneak.

YALLI: I'll be the lookout.

SYMRAN: We're boldly striding into it; we're not sneaking.

ADORA: OK. I'm sorry. You're boldly striding into the city hall, behind these other people.

STRIDER: With him ranting…

ADORA: With him ranting about his religious things.

YALLI: I'll be the lookout.

NORSHA: Lookout for what?

SYMRAN: To see if they try and attack us for trying to skip ahead in line.

YALLI: Yeah, yeah.

ADORA: The people in line pay no attention to you three, so you three are now inside the city hall.

NORSHA: Which three? You should point that out.

ADORA: Oh, Norsha, Symran and Strider. He's causing a pretty big distraction right now. You guys practically got in for free here. Basically.

MORRIS: Is it my turn?

ADORA: No, it's their turn. Norsha, go.

NORSHA: What do I see?

ADORA: You see a man, sitting behind a desk. He looks kind of old, he's got a little moustache, and he's got gray hair. And he's got spectacles.

NORSHA: How do I come to a desk if I just walked into the building? Isn't there supposed to be a hall before I get to that room?

MORRIS: You have bypassed the hall. It was surprisingly easy because everyone was watching me make a fool of myself.

ADORA: There's a desk. To the side of it's a receptionist.

NORSHA: Receptionist? All right.

MORRIS: The receptionist is old?

ADORA: Yeah.

NORSHA: Oh. OK. Are there doors in this room?

ADORA: There's a stairway leading upstairs.

NORSHA: I go to the stairway leading upstairs.

ADORA: The receptionist says, "Hey! You! Stop!"

NORSHA: I ignore the receptionist and continue going upstairs.

MORRIS: As in every movie the receptionist doesn't actually do anything except whine at you.

ADORA: "Hey, get back here! I'll lose my job! Get back here! Ah, forget it." He continues to write out his piece.

MORRIS: Oh, he?

ADORA: He.

NORSHA: He has a moustache!

ADORA: OK, stop! Symran!

SYMRAN: I peer about the room, then stride toward the stair with the intent of walking up them.

ADORA: Strider?

STRIDER: I follow the group.

ADORA: OK. So.

MORRIS: My turn?

ADORA: Actually, yes, it is now.

MORRIS: OK.

SYMRAN: No, no, no, wait. Yalli.

ADORA: Yalli already went.

MORRIS: I attempt to—

NORSHA: No she didn't.

ADORA: Yes she did. She said she was going to stand lookout.

MORRIS: I attempt to insanely swing my staff around so I can get through the crowd to make them flee out of the way.

ADORA: OK, the people clear Hwaaa! And they step back a bit, but once again, there are a couple people there with their own weapons.

MORRIS: So I guess I have to roll a die?

ADORA: One of them has a knife on him. He pulls out a knife and goes, "Ha! You want to fight, pal?"

MORRIS: I try to smash his face in.

STRIDER: Just the thing to do, I see.

ADORA: OK, let's see…

MORRIS: I told you at the beginning of this—

ADORA: OK, well, your staff causes damage 1D, and you have an attack skill of 5D, so…

SYMRAN: Geez, we're screwed.

ADORA: Technically, I'm supposed to give you six dice.

MORRIS: Yeah, but it's supposed to be five and one, isn't it?

ADORA: Five plus one equals six.

MORRIS: No, but I do five and then one, so we do them separately, right?

ADORA: No, it doesn't really matter. OK. You have six dice. That's your attack skill. Now, the burly man who is attacking you with a knife has just 4D, so roll your dice, and I'll roll mine as the burly man.

MORRIS: All of them?

ADORA: All of them. Roll them all.

MORRIS: OK. Six. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Fifteen. Sixteen, seventeen.

ADORA: OK. I got, let's see here, eleven—

STRIDER: Fifteen.

ADORA: Twelve, thirteen, fourt—

STRIDER: Sixteen.

ADORA: Fifteen, sixteen. OK. I got sixteen, you got what?

MORRIS: Twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, six—seventeen.

ADORA: Seventeen. All right. Seventeen minus sixteen is one. Basically, you whack him in the face but it doesn't hurt him very much. He loses a hit point.

SYMRAN: You bruised his nose.

ADORA: You bruise his nose. He loses one hit point.

MORRIS: But is he stunned enough for me to run away?

ADORA: He is stunned—yes, he is stunned enough for you to run away.

MORRIS: I run as fast as my feet can carry me!

ADORA: To where?

MORRIS: Inside!

SYMRAN: Isn't there a crowd of people still blocking his way?

ADORA: Actually, not really.

STRIDER: They're all on this side, surrounding him so he can't escape.

ADORA: Yeah. So basically, with people on this side he runs in this way. He runs northward.

MORRIS: And I'm holding my staff out like this so the people who get in my way are on the ground now.

SYMRAN: Thump thump! Thump!

ADORA: OK. You throw people to the ground as you run in to the…

STRIDER: He's going NHL on ice.

ADORA: Anyway, back to the people inside. You go up the stairs.

NORSHA: She has not had a turn.

ADORA: And Yalli has not had a turn.

SYMRAN: Yalli isn't doing her job.

YALLI: I'm following him to make sure he doesn't destroy himself.

MORRIS: Well, thank you.

NORSHA: Aren't you going to do anything humorous?

YALLI: No, there's no room. Somebody's got to play the straight man, you know. You can't have light without darkness.

ADORA: OK, moving on. Ahem, ahem ahem ahem ahem ahem!

MORRIS: Yes, you can. Light is roughly the absence of darkness.

ADORA: Shh. Morris, quiet.

STRIDER: A rock lands on his head.

ADORA: You guys, there's a door in front of you. A nice little double door, with these little brass…

MORRIS: Door knob. Handles.

ADORA: Door knob handles.

NORSHA: I'm going to open the door. What's inside?

ADORA: You're going to open the door, what's inside? The mayor.

MORRIS: Hi, mayor!

NORSHA: Is he sitting in white space, or is there more to the room than that?

ADORA: She is sitting there, at her desk, writing something down, and there are some bookcases behind her, and they're full of books.

NORSHA: Are there guards inside the room?

ADORA: There are no guards.

NORSHA: Is there chairs in front of her desk?

ADORA: There are a couple chairs in front of the desk.

NORSHA: I take one of the chairs, put it in front of the desk, and put my feet up on the desk.

SYMRAN: I follow suit.

ADORA: Now, there's only two chairs. Strider, what are you going to do?

STRIDER: Is there anything valuable on the desk?

ADORA: No! OK—

MORRIS: I attempt to convert the mayor—

ADORA: Wait, you're not there yet. You three are now in a group.

STRIDER: I'm not done yet. Stop that. I'm going to talk to the mayor and destract her away while they steal the chairs or something.

NORSHA: I'm not going to steal the chairs, I'm going to talk to the mayor.

ADORA: The mayor looks up from her writing, slowly. She puts her glasses down. I should describe her, huh? She looks kind of young, she has golden hair that's put up in a little bun, and she's wearing a tunic, and trousers or something—she's wearing casual clothes. She's a very casual mayor here. So…

NORSHA: I'm going to stare at her until she talks to me.

ADORA: "Would you like something? Can I help you? Stop staring at me."

SYMRAN: What's with the riot?

ADORA: "Riot? What riot?"

SYMRAN: Uhh, no riot. By the way, how long have you been mayor?

ADORA: "Mmm, I just got the job a few weeks ago."

SYMRAN: Why'd you get the job?

ADORA: "My father passed away."

MORRIS: Was he the old mayor?

ADORA: "Yes." As DM again, it seems that Morris and Yalli have suddenly appeared in the room, the mayor's room.

MORRIS: Man, that receptionist is annoying.

ADORA: Well then. Back to the mayor.

NORSHA: There was a receptionist?

SYMRAN: You don't remember the old guy who didn't really like you running straight up the stairs and definitely didn't—

NORSHA: Yes, I remember that. My character ignored the receptionist. My character has no clue that there was a receptionist because she totally—

SYMRAN: My character reminded your character.

NORSHA: —did not acknowledge the receptionist—

MORRIS: My character tells everyone to shut up or the gods will destroy them all.

ADORA: "Um, um, can we have silence here? What's going on? Why are you in my room?"

SYMRAN: I'm trying to figure out what's going on.

ADORA: "People want to lay claim to the area around the river behind the town."

STRIDER: Why can't they?

ADORA: "Why can't they?"

NORSHA: Yes. You're not letting them.

ADORA: "I'm letting them. Well, my receptionist is supposed to be letting them. I don't know."

NORSHA: Why are they protesting and rioting if you're letting them?

MORRIS: Because the receptionist is a dimwit.

ADORA: "They are?" The mayor gets up from her seat and looks outside the window. She sees all the people rioting. "Oh goodness, what's happening? Oh."

NORSHA: Well, the riot's are your fault, or especially his fault.

ADORA: "What have you done? Guards! Wait, I don't have any guards. Get out!"

ADORA: Part four. OK. This is what's going on now. The mayor's calmed down. She's no longer calling for her guards. She calms down, she sits back in her seat, and calmly asks you: "What do you want?"

MORRIS: Is she speaking directly to Norsha?

ADORA: Yes. She's speaking to Norsha, looking at her, in the eyes.

NORSHA: Norsha stand there, sits there actually, and stares at the mayor.

SYMRAN: I wait for Norsha to speak.

STRIDER: I get annoyed.

MORRIS: I sit there and laugh inwardly.

ADORA: Yalli, you're there too. Please be the voice of reason.

YALLI: OK, I'm Yalli, and, Mayor, Madam Mayor, what I would like to know is what's going on in that mine? What are all those noises that are coming out from inside that cave or mine-cave?

ADORA: "Hmm. Well, it's probably just creaks and groans of the old railway in there. So, all the miners think it's haunted. Well, they closed it up. It's not under my authorization. If you want to go in there, feel free."

YALLI: Oh! So we can go in there if we want to?

ADORA: "Sure. The miners might try to stop you, though."

NORSHA: Wait a second.

STRIDER: Quiet! Let's go.

NORSHA: Did you say "clatch"?

MORRIS: He quacked.

ADORA: I'm assuming you guys are going to go. You can leave now. OK. You walk towards the mine. The miners, some of the miners look at you suspiciously, because you're walking towards the mine, and an old miner walks up to you and says, "Ahem."

NORSHA: How'd we get out of the building? Isn't there a riot outside?

ADORA: Oh yeah. The riot, right. Guess what. They dispersed.

SYMRAN: So convenient.

ADORA: Remember when Eric started, you know, whacking people?

MORRIS: Morris.

ADORA: Sorry. Morris, Morris started whacking people around with the staff? They dispersed.

NORSHA: No they didn't.

ADORA: Huh?

NORSHA: No they didn't

ADORA: Yes they did.

MORRIS: She's the game master. They dispersed.

ADORA: They dispersed, and now, and now you're at the mine. An old miner walks up to you and says, "Hey, the mine's haunted. You sure you want to go in there?"

STRIDER: Yes. We are.

YALLI: And we all say "Yeah, let's go."

MORRIS: Yes, we want to go to the mine. Get out of the way, or I'll fracture your shoulder with my staff.

ADORA: "All right."

NORSHA: Can we hurt the miner?

ADORA: No, you may not hurt the miner!

MORRIS: You suck.

ADORA: The miner just sniffs and walks away. He mumbles to himself, or actually, he mumbles loud enough for you guys to hear, "Ha. Have a nice life." You walk up to the mine opening. There's some wooden boards that are keeping it closed. Yes, Symran, what would you like to do?

SYMRAN: Can I throw a fireball at the boards?

NORSHA: Only if you want to burn down the entire little wooden area.

ADORA: Warning: The fram is also made out of wood.

SYMRAN: Oooh.

NORSHA: I'm going to look for another entrance because I don't want to die.

SYMRAN: OK, I won't throw a ball of fire at it.

MORRIS: Morris is terrified of fires.

STRIDER: I follow the group, but keep my distance from him, because I don't know when he's getting ready to throw a fireball—

YALLI: I have a sword.

ADORA: Yalli has something to say.

YALLI: I'm Yalli, and I have a sword, and I think I will try to knock down those boards with my sword.

MORRIS: I wish the boards were made out of bunny rabbits.

ADORA: Boards made out of bunny rabbits, yeah, that makes sense. You need…let's see here…you need seven out of three dice so roll.

YALLI: Oh, really? Oh, I can do that.

ADORA: Five, six, seven, eight, nine.

YALLI: Yeah!

ADORA: You bash the boards and they break under your immense strength. So now, the mine is open. Yalli, you listening? Yalli listens to…and there is a light sound of "Whooooo…".

MORRIS: It sounds like a party!

STRIDER: I yell out really loud, "Stop that!"

NORSHA: Paaaar-tay!

SYMRAN: I suggest we prod Morris in first.

ADORA: Symran grabs Morris and shoves him in first.

MORRIS: Aaaaahhh…

-thump-

MORRIS: Ow!

ADORA: All right. Tape side two, I guess. You guys are inside. Are you going to go ahead and enter the mine?

SYMRAN: As long as Morris is still alive.

ADORA: Morris is still alive.

SYMRAN: OK, that's good.

ADORA: Symran strolls in.

YALLI: I'm Yalli, and I say, "Hello, anybody in there?"

MORRIS: Yes!

ADORA: No, Morris!

YALLI: Not you, Morris!

ADORA: You hear your own echo. That's all you hear

SYMRAN: Maybe we should light a torch or something.

STRIDER: I yell out, "Is there a party?"

ADORA: You hear your own echo.

SYMRAN: BJ, speak louder.

ADORA: OK, anyway, there is a torch near to the side of the mine. It's a little torch holder.

NORSHA: I light the torch.

ADORA: Good Norsha. You light the torch. It's lighted now!

MORRIS: Lit.

ADORA: You lit the torch. Whatever. Um, so, the mine's basically one, straight mine shaft. It goes straight in. There's no tunnels, there's no tunnels going anywhere else. It's just straight as far as you can see. You also notice it goes slightly downward.

MORRIS: OK, let's go.

ADORA: OK, I guess you're going.

MORRIS: Yes.

NORSHA: As they go ahead, I'm going to take the torch out of the torch holder and then follow them, because they're walking in the darkness.

ADORA: OK, yes. Yes.

SYMRAN: I'm going to follow behind Norsha.

MORRIS: I'm going to walk well ahead of Norsha, just in case she tries to steal my money.

ADORA: You really don't trust her, OK?

-grunt and loud unintelligible noise-

STRIDER: Bats!

NORSHA: Bass? What's a bass?

SYMRAN: It's a fish.

NORSHA: Oh. Why are there fish in a mine?

ADORA: No, bats. Two bats attack you.

YALLI: Who, Norsha?

MORRIS: Ow!

ADORA: They're in front of you right now, they're flapping. Symran wants to do an action.

SYMRAN: I want to throw a fireball at them.

ADORA: Oi.

NORSHA: No. No fireball. Bats—

MORRIS: It is a wooden cave.

NORSHA: You cannot ignite fires in the mine.

SYMRAN: I don't have any other spells, do I?

ADORA: No you don't.

NORSHA: Can I wave my torch at them it'll scare them away, because they're only about this big?

ADORA: Bats are eight to six inches.

NORSHA: Eight to six inches?

ADORA: Eight to ten, sorry. Eight to ten inches wingspan.

NORSHA: Wingspan. That still means their bodies are only about six, five inches. So if they're little itty bitty fruit bats I'm going to wave my torch at them and scare them away because they are small.

MORRIS: Can I wave my staff at them, then?

NORSHA: No.

ADORA: Wait, wait, wait. We have to do this by turns, OK? First of all, Sharon wants to wave and see if they run away. So using this special happy dice, if she gets a one or a four, they fly away.

NORSHA: One or a four?

ADORA: And other numbers, they'll stay.

SYMRAN: Hee hee hee.

ADORA: Two. They stay.

NORSHA: I think I should roll!

ADORA: Wait, wait, ahh…

MORRIS: Sharon does have a point.

NORSHA: Oh, they run away.

ADORA: Fine, we’ll play that way. I knew you were going to do that, but fine.

MORRIS: Morris grabs a bat, throws it on the ground, and jumps on it!

ADORA: NO! They fly away.

YALLI: Be nice to the bats.

SYMRAN: Symran thwacks Morris.

STRIDER: You'll have the PTA all over you.

ADORA: So now the bats are flying away. Now you keep going, I guess. You keep walking, and you come across a chest.

SYMRAN: Ooh.

ADORA: A little treasure chest, it's about…

MORRIS: Ooh! I have a question. Is the chest attached to a body?

ADORA: NO! It's not attached to a body. There is a skeleton nearby, however.

NORSHA: I think Morris should try to open the chest.

SYMRAN: I think Morris should try to turn the skeleton, if it's alive. If it's dead it'll probably turn him anyways.

NORSHA: I think Morris should try to open the chest.

MORRIS: Yalli is the warrior and is logically more str—she's logically stronger.

ADORA: The chest is foot by foot dimensions.

SYMRAN: Do you know what I suggest? I suggest out thief check it for traps.

YALLI: I'll open it.

NORSHA: No, don't open it, Yalli. Yalli will not open it…

ADORA: Yalli will open it because she wants to. I am the game master.

MORRIS: Yalli wants to open it.

NORSHA: Yalli, do not open the chest.

MORRIS: Yalli wants to open the chest, let her open the chest.

NORSHA: Fine! Die.

ADORA: You walk up to the chest. As you open it, you hear a clicking sound. It's the lock breaking.

YALLI: Oh, OK.

ADORA: It's really rusted. Inside, you find a little porcelain doll. Still in pretty good condition. You want to take it with you?

YALLI: Oh, yeah.

STRIDER: Aah! It's Barney! Kill it!

ADORA: Part four.

MORRIS: Five.

SYMRAN: Bum bum bum.

ADORA: Five?

MORRIS: Five.

ADORA: Five, sorry.

SYMRAN: Bum bum bum.

ADORA: So now you have the doll. You continue going into the cavern.

NORSHA: I want to look at the doll. Yalli, can I look at the doll?

YALLI: Yeah. You can look at the doll.

NORSHA: Is the doll standing? Is the doll sitting? Is the doll in any sort of position?

ADORA: The doll is in a hands-to-its-sides, legs, you know, straight.

NORSHA: Soldier position?

ADORA: Soldier position, sort of.

NORSHA: Is it…what gender is the doll?

ADORA: It's female.

NORSHA: Female? Is it a little girl or is it mature adult?

ADORA: It is a little baby girl doll.

NORSHA: What color's her hair?

ADORA: Blonde.

NORSHA: Are you making this up?

MORRIS: That's none of your business.

ADORA: Why does it matter?

NORSHA: OK, moving on.

ADORA: Yes, moving on. OK. You continue further into the cave.

SYMRAN: Yes, we do.

ADORA: The sound of the "Whoooooo" gets louder. OK. Norsha has the doll. And you're walking, you continue to walk, and a couple—you hear squeaking noises. "Eee eee eee!"

NORSHA: Coming from where?

ADORA: Coming from behind you.

NORSHA: Behind us?

ADORA: Behind you.

NORSHA: I look behind me.

MORRIS: Are there any rabbits?

ADORA: One giant rat.

SYMRAN: Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

NORSHA: How big is it?

ADORA: It is about the size…let's see here. It is about three feet tall, approximately.

NORSHA: At the shoulders, or standing up?

ADORA: At the shoulders.

NORSHA: That's a small dog.

ADORA: It's a rat. It's going "squeak squeak" and it has a little naked tail, and it's going "squeak squeak" with…

SYMRAN: It's a giant rat.

ADORA: …big giant scissors going "gnash gnash gnash."

NORSHA: Hey, Morris? I think the rat would like to hear one of your seminars. We should continue going forward.

MORRIS: Morris thwacks Norsha.

ADORA: Enough fighting among yourselves. We're going to go into battle mode. Da-da-da. So, first person who goes is Norsha, then Yalli, Symran, Strider, and Morris is last.

MORRIS: Why do I always have to be last?

ADORA: Because you're the priest. You're in the back. No, actually, wait, you're in the back, he attacked you from behind. You're going first!

NORSHA: I'm the only one who's turned around

ADORA: Oh, you guys haven't turned around?

NORSHA: Yeah.

ADORA: OK. You turn around.

MORRIS: OK. I attempt to gouge out its eyeballs with my staff.

ADORA: Your staff? OK.

NORSHA: You can't gouge with a staff.

SYMRAN: You can blindside.

NORSHA: You can thwack people, but you can't gouge.

ADORA: You can whack people with a staff. Here, 5D. Five dice.

MORRIS: How much do I have to roll?

ADORA: Well, you have to beat my score, basically. So I'm going to roll four dice because that's the rat's defense.

MORRIS: And the rat gets…

ADORA: Ten, eleven, twelve…

MORRIS: Fourteen.

ADORA: Fourteen. So…

MORRIS: And Morris goes for a fifteen!

ADORA: Holy moly! OK, that's six, six, that's eighteen, nineteen, twenty, ooh! Twenty-five!

MORRIS: Whee!

ADORA: Eleven hit points of damage! Ach! The rat staggers back and looks at you, its great gleaming eyes. Khkhkhkhkh!

SYMRAN: Can I attack next?

ADORA: Strider attacks next.

NORSHA: Strider, do not throw a fireball.

SYMRAN: My name is not Strider.

SYMRAN: I'm not going to throw a fireball.

MORRIS: The rat has been blinded.

STRIDER: I cast confusion at the rat.

ADORA: You want to cast confusion? All right, let's see.

SYMRAN: What's up with you and confusion?

ADORA: Yeah, what's up with you and confusion?

STRIDER: Just what do I need to roll?

ADORA: You need to roll a five or a six.

MORRIS: I gouged out its eyes!

STRIDER: Six!

ADORA: Six! All right, the rat goes "Eeeh!" It's confused now. It turns around and runs away.

NORSHA: Now we don't have any experience. Thank you, BJ.

SYMRAN: Can I chase it down?

ADORA: Do you want to chase it down?

SYMRAN: Yes.

ADORA: Fine, you're coming out on your own.

SYMRAN: Is anybody else going to help me chase it down so we can get some experience?

MORRIS: I will!

NORSHA: That depends. Will we get any experience if it runs away?

ADORA: Uhh…sure.

NORSHA: OK.

ADORA: It's not really experience, it’s more like the end accumulated amount of points for the amount of good things and just landmarks that you hit and stuff.

SYMRAN: Well, are we going to chase it, or—is anybody—if nobody's following me, then I'm not running.

STRIDER: I'm following.

YALLI: I'm following.

NORSHA: All right, I'll follow.

MORRIS: I'll stand on the spot where I am.

SYMRAN: OK, so everybody but Morris is running after the rat.

ADORA: You run—

MORRIS: I'm going to wash off my staff now.

ADORA: The rat seems to have disappeared.

NORSHA: I'm not running, I'm following at a walking pace.

ADORA: The rat has disappeared, but there is a rather large hole in the wall.

NORSHA: Well, thank you for telling us that when we passed it.

ADORA: You didn't look.

NORSHA: It's something that you see.

ADORA: It's newly-dug!

MORRIS: It's new.

SYMRAN: I call back to Norsha to tell her to shove the torch in the wall and see what's in there.

ADORA: It's a newly-dug hole. You can tell, because you see—

SYMRAN: How big is it?

ADORA: Three feet high.

SYMRAN: I'm going to head back to Morris.

STRIDER: A little big to shove a torch in there, don't you think?

SYMRAN: …who is probably standing in complete darkness, I might add.

MORRIS: And let me tell you, it's mighty hard to wash off a bleeding staff.

ADORA: OK, OK, OK. So, I guess you guys are all going to go ahead and continue?

SYMRAN: Mmm hmm.

ADORA: All right. So you continue on, and you are…it seems that you're nearing the end. Uhh, let's see here…you have reached the end of the mine, because there's a wall in front of you. Aha. And the wailing is very loud here. "Whoooooooooooooooo."

NORSHA: What the - - - -'s making that bloody wailing?

MORRIS: Bloody's my word.

ADORA: Suddenly, a ghost shimmers into shape in front of you. The ghost looks like a little girl.

NORSHA: Does she look like the doll?

ADORA: No! She doesn't look like the doll.

NORSHA: - - - -.

ADORA: She looks at you then cries some more. It seems like she wants something.

SYMRAN: Give her the doll.

NORSHA: The doll!

MORRIS: Do you want something?

ADORA: The doll you're holding shivers slightly. The ghost girl points at it and cries some more.

NORSHA: No duh. Give her the bloody doll already.

ADORA: You hold out the doll. A ghostly hand reaches out to take it. It floats from your hand to hers, and she hugs the doll. She looks at you, gives you a happy little smile, and she waves goodbye and fades from view. And the doll drops to the ground.

MORRIS: Shucks! I was going to convert her to my religion.

ADORA: You have finished! Yay! But you still have to get out of the mine, though.

NORSHA: Why did the little girl die? Why is she in the mine? Why did she want her doll? There are lots of unanswered questions. Who killed the little girl? Because she probably didn't die of natural causes. There's a murderer out there who killed a little girl! We need to kill him!

SYMRAN: We might find out on the way back out of the mine.

ADORA: Considering that you hear a rumbling…

NORSHA: Rumbling?

SYMRAN: Can we all start running towards the entrance?

NORSHA: Run towards the entrance! Run towards the entrance!

ADORA: You start running. The cave is collapsing!

STRIDER: Run run run!

SYMRAN: Some of us aren't getting out of this alive.

NORSHA: Sacrifice Morris!

MORRIS: No!

ADORA: OK, OK. No sacrificing people here. You run, and you run quick, because the cave is collapsing behind you!

NORSHA: Why is it collapsing behind us? Shouldn't it be collapsing in front of us, at the entrance?

MORRIS: No.

ADORA: Actually, it started collapsing from the back. Anyway—

NORSHA: Why?

ADORA: Just because.

MORRIS: Because Adora said so, and she's game master.

STRIDER: She's god with a lowercase "g".

ADORA: OK, OK. You guys are running, the cave is collapsing. Actually, it's collapsing on all sides, so you run. You all dive out! Whaaa! The cave collapses behind you.

SYMRAN: Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

ADORA: Boom. The cave is closed. You can't go back in. There's rocks around it, unless you want to dig your way back in and get the doll itself.

MORRIS: Morris wishes he'd had his video camera with him

NORSHA: I never dropped the doll.

ADORA: You just said you gave the doll to the girl, the doll drops to the ground.

NORSHA: Yeah, but the girl didn't take it.

SYMRAN: It floated to her hand, the girl dropped it.

NORSHA: Oh, OK, never mind.

ADORA: You have reached the end of your scenario. OK.

NORSHA: Why have we reached the end of the scenario?

ADORA: Because this is the end. There's nothing else you can do here.

NORSHA: Can't we find out who killed the little girl?

SYMRAN: Can I harass shopkeepers?

MORRIS: Yes, who did kill the little girl? –gasp- I know who it was! It was that evil mayor lady!

SYMRAN: It was the butler!

STRIDER: It was Mr. Green in the library.

NORSHA: It was the guy who told us not to go in the cave!

SYMRAN: With the hacksaw.

ADORA: And this ends our session.

SYMRAN: No, it doesn't.