The RPG Party- Part 4: It Was All Sephiroth's Fault! Featuring: Sephiroth, Cloud, Yuffie, and Billy -------------------------------------
Cid: Now that it's part 4, can we know who Cloud likes?
Mysterious voice: First, I must reveal myself to you!
Ash: All right, then just tell us!
Mysterious voice: Here's a hint- Final Fantasy 7, bwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!
Barret: Oh my *$&#^ god, it's-
Sephiroth: Yes, I am the mighty Sephiroth!
Barret: Oh, I thought he was Palmer...
Sephiroth: YOU SHALL DIE FOR COMPARING ME TO THAT FAT *$&#^!!!!!!!!!!!! *walks over to Cloud* Cloud, awaken!
Cloud: Huh????
Sephiroth: You are now under MY control!
Cloud: Yes......oh.......great........Sephiroth....... *bows to him*
Bart: Who the hell is this guy?
Margie: Don't you ever play video games, Bart? He's the main villian of Final Fantasy 7! *dramatic music*
Sephiroth: Now, my puppet, walk over to Barret! *Cloud walks over to Barret*
Tifa: Uh oh, this looks bad...
Misty: You know, that guy is hottttttttt!!!!! Oh, that silver hair........ *Ash punches her* ASH!!!!!
Ash: You're supossed to like me, you moron!
Misty: I am? No I'm not!!!!!!
Ash: Yes you are!!!!!!!!!!!
Misty: No I'm not!!!!!!!!
Ash: Yes you are!!!!!!!
Fei: Uh, could you please cut the &#*%@ fighting? We're trying to get something done here!
Misty and Ash: Oops, sorry... *both shut up*
Cloud: now........what........must..........I.........do..............master?
Sephiroth: We must make Barret pay for calling me Palmer!
Cloud: how........................master?
Sephiroth: I would like you to, uh, oh yeah, sing Hanson!!!!!
Everyone: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Everyone rushes out of room except Barret, who is cornered by Cloud and Sephiroth*
Barret: #&^@#!$%!!!!!!!!!! *Tries to cover ears but is prevented by Sephiroth*
Cloud: yes..........Sephiroth..........*Starts to sing at the top of his lungs* MMMMMMMMBOP!!!!!!!!!! DOP WAY DOO WOP!!!!!!!!!! MMMBOP!!!!!! DOP WAY DOO WOP!!!!!!!!! YEAH YEAH!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone from the other room: CLOUD!!!!!!! YOUR VOICE *$&#^@ SUCKS!!!!!!!!!
Sephiroth: Cloud, Stop singing!
Cloud: Yes.........................mighty............Sephiroth.........*Stops*
Barret: Thank god
Sephiroth: Now, you must pay more! Cloud, summon Hanson!
Cloud: OK.........I.............will......*Summons Hanson*
Ike: Hey! Wow! Someone actually wanted to hear our music!
Tay: We'll perform a full concert for you!
Sephiroth: Actually, I want you to sing to this guy so his brains explode.
Zac: *#^&$@!!!!!!!!!! oh well, we get so few offers we'll do it anyway....And that psycho guy with the hair sticking up should join us to increase our sound.
Barret: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS *#^&@^$%@)!*#@$^*#@*&$)!#(*^@%# awful!!!!!!
Everyone from other room: We're heading to the Yggdrasil!
Hanson and Cloud: MMMBOP!!!!!! DOP WAY DOO WOP!!!!!!!! MMMBOP!!!!!!!!!! DOP WHY DOO WOP!!!!!!!!!! YEAH YEAH!!!!!!!!! MMMBOP!!!!!!!! DOP WHY DO WOP!!!!!!!!!!!! A DO IT OP WHY DO WOP!!!!!!!!!! DOP WHY DO!!!! OH YEAH!
Barret: This is *&#^%@ killing my brain! Help me! Noo! My brain is exploding! Help! Noo, please!!!!!!! *Barrets goes temporarily insane and passes out*
Hanson: Wow, we actually did something right!
Sephiroth: Now, you must die, too! Your music sucks! *Sucks Hanson into a vaccum cleaner*
Hanson: Uh-oh *Disappears*
Sephiroth: Now, my work is done. I must leave and attend to my world domination plans. Goodbye, my puppet! *Flies away, leaving Cloud asleep but out of the trance*
A few minutes later, everyone decides that it should be over by then and comes back.
Elly: Hey, what happened?
Tifa: Cloud, hon, wake up! *Taps him on shoulder*
Aeris: Sweetie, nap time's over! *Gives him a kiss*
Cloud: mmmmmmmmmph........*wakes up*
Tifa: Hey, how come he woke up to you!
Aeris: Because the author likes me better, stupid!
Tifa: Oh yeah, I forgot........
Bart: Say Elly, doesn't this remind you of the guys in the Ethos dig site that put us to sleep and then gave us those damn wake up kisses?
Elly: Oh yeah, it was pretty yucky being kissed by that fish!
Fei: How come I don't remember this?
Margie: Because you were sick in the Yggdrasil.....
Maria: And while I wasn't a party member at the time, I hear you were being a split personality, you *$&^!!!!!!
Fei: heh heh, sorry...
Cloud: *Now fully awake* Uh, why is Barret passed out with brains leaking of his head?
Ash: It's a long story, Cloud....
Pikachu: Pika pika! (No shit!)
Cid: Let's just say it had to do with that &#^%*$@ Sephiroth...
Cloud: SEPHIROTH!!!! Damn fool! He's such a &$#@*&^%@#*^!*&@*%#(*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Continues swearing*
Aeris: Yeah, I think we would've passed out too if we'd stayed to hear you and Hanson sing Mmmbop together...
Cloud: I was singing MMMBOP!?!?!?!?!? What the *&$$#^(@#%$(^@%&(^@#(*&!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Maria: He'll wake up when their hypnotizing spell wears off.
Bart: Speaking of Sephiroth, he never told us who you liked.
Everyone except Cloud: You're right!!!!! That little *&#^@!!! *everyone is mad at Sephiroth*
Cloud: Oh, I can tell you that, no biggie.
Ash: So, who do you like, then?
Cloud: Well, I kind of hate to admit this, but since that *&$#@($*@^#%^)(!% Sephiroth has made all of you curious, I'll admit it- Yuffie!
Everyone: YUFFIE!!!!!!!! YOU LIKE YUFFIE? YUCK!!!!!!!! *everyone runs to the bathroom*
Yuffie: Did i hear my name?
Everyone: oh, uh, hi Yuffie.
Yuffie: I decided to come to the party even though all of you are losers.
Misty: You walked all the way here, alone?
Yuffie: Nope, I had my bodyguard with me!
Aeris: Why is this starting to sound familiar?
Tifa: haha Aeris.
Fei: So, who is your bodyguard?
Yuffie: Allow me to introduce...........drum roll please................BILLY LEE BLACK!!!!!! *Billy comes running into the house and performs an act with his gun*
Bart, Margie, Maria, Fei, and Elly: BILLY? Since when did you become a bodyguard?
Billy: uh, since this morning.......
Yuffie: Isn't he sexy?
Cloud: Yuffie! Didn't you hear me proclaim my, uh, undying love for you?
Yuffie: oh, I thought you hated me after I slapped you on that date we went on...
Aeris and Tifa: Wait a minute! I thought you went on a date with ME that night!
Cloud: Uh, hehe, I kinda went with all of you at different times.......*$^&*#@#%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yuffie: Well, too bad! Billy's my guy now!
Margie: That girl is one big bitch......
Elly: Yeah, I can't believe Billy fell for her act.
Billy: Hey! I'm 16!
Elly: I'm 18
Billy: Oh.....................................forget it!!!!!!
Yuffie: Come on upstairs with me, Billy willy.
Billy: You guys have bedrooms upstairs, right?
Ash: Yeah, why?
Yuffie: Uh, just asking.....
Fei: *To Elly* Hey, are they trying to imitate us?
Elly: *To Fei* They just got here, stupid lovey dove!!!!
Bart: I thought people as religious as you believed in no sex before marriage!
Billy: Remember, the Etones were fake! So I'm not religious then! haha!
Aeris: Oh my god........
Tifa: Well, if you're going up, at least take Barret with you. *gestures to Barret, still passed out*
Yuffie: Ugh, I never liked that guy anyway!
Billy: I'll take him *attemps to lift Barret* Damn! How much does this guy weigh?
Cloud: A lot.....
Cid: *whispering to himself* ...more then you, you wimpy, girly looking bastard.
Misty: Say, did you know that you look hot when you're pissed, Billy?
Ash: Misty, you think every guy looks hot when he's pissed.
Misty: Oh yeah, I'm a member of the pissed Nick Carter Club, the pissed Justin Timeberlake Club, the pissed Tiger Woods Club, the pissed Matt Damon club, the pissed Derek Jeter club......
Ash: We get the point, Misty!
Misty: Can't I name all 106?
Everyone: NO!!!!!!!
Pikachu: pikachu pi pi chu!!!!!! (I know how Barret can be woken up!)
Ash: How, pikachu? *Pikachu uses thundershock on Barret* Oh......
Barret: Uh, where am I.......what am I........why do I exist.........hello world!!!!!!! *Starts singing Cotton Eyed Joe while dancing on a table*
Maria: Whoops, looks like he's still insane.
Yuffie: Well now that that's taken care of, Billy and I are gonna go have fun! Come on Billy! *Pulls him upstairs*
Barret: Where did you come from, where did you go? Where did you come from cotten eyed Joe? hey hey hey hey!!! *Suddenly snaps out of trance* AHHHH!!!!!!!!! *(@#%^*&@%#^*@%!!!!!!! Why am I wearing a farming outfit and dancing on top of the table?
Cid: Let's just say you were drunk and leave it at that.....
Barret: OK, whatever....*Shrugs*
Just then, Billy and Yuffie come down, Billy in boxers and Yuffie in skimpy night clothes.
Billy: We thought the bedroom was boring.
Yuffie: So we were wondering if we could have fun on the Yggdrasil that Billy's been telling me about.
Billy: Please Bart?
Bart: Whatever. Suit yourself.
Yuffie and Billy: YAY!!!!!!!!!!! *Run off to Yggdrasil*
Ash: So now what can we do?
Misty: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tifa: What's wrong, Misty? *Goes over to comfort her*
Misty: Billy......he's so hot, but he's never going to be mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *continues crying*
Elly: You like Billy?
Misty: Sniff, yes, sniff, I do!!!!!
Maria: I don't blame you, he's an adorable guy. And sweet, too!
Misty: Do you, sniff, think he might, sniff, like me?
Fei: Well, he appears taken by- *Stops talking when he hears sounds on the deck of the Yggdrasil*
Billy: YUFFIE!!!!!!!!! How dare you take my gear!
Yuffie: haha, you thought I like you! Haha, all I wanted was your gear!
Billy: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! My prized posession! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!!!!!!!
Margie: Sounds like they aren't getting along Misty, maybe you have a chance!
Misty: YES!!!!!!!!!
Cid: Shouldn't we go get the gear from %$^#&@ Yuffie?
Barret: Yeah, that #$@%^ girl.....always stealing something........
Elly: We'd better hurry! Those things are even stronger than they look! *Everyone runs to Yggdrasil to find Billy in his boxers screaming for his gear*
Billy: Thank god you guys came for help! Could you guys get in your gears and get my gear back?
Bart: Yeah, just a sec! *Everyone from Xenogears except Margie goes running to their gears*
Ash: You know, I've seen wacky things, but this takes the cake!
Pikachu: Pika pi! (I agree!)
Suddenly, Yuffie comes roaring out!
Yuffie: Haha!!!!!!!! I'm going to get all the materia and money from eveyone! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
Cloud: YUFFIE!!!!!! I'll give you my materia!
Barret: Mine too!
Tifa: Same here!
Aeris: And mine!
Cid: how about the Highwind along with it?
Yuffie: ALL RIGHT!!!!!!!! Now I'll get out of the gear!
Maria: Not so fast!
Yuffie: Huh? *Turns around to see Seibzehn, Vierge, Xenogears, Brigandier, and an enormous Chu chu* AHHHH!!!!!!
Bart: You're not getting away with this, Yuffie!
Fei: Everyone, attack! *Yuffie is surrounded and everyone moves in to attack*
Yuffie: (@%^(*&%@)(*#@!!!!!!!!!!! *faints. Billy's gear crashes on several other gears, denting them and then falls on to the Yggdrasil, making it even more broken up*
Billy: My gear!
Elly: My gear!
Maria: My gear!
Fei: My gear!
Chu-chu: My enlarged body!
Bart: My gear!
Margie: The Yggdrasil!
Yuffie: *Wakes up from faint* I may have not gotten away with it, but at least I destroyed everything!
Billy: I can't believe I let her seduce me.
Cloud: Relax. It happens to the best of us.
Aeris: Misty, I think it's time....
Misty: Uh, hi Billy, I uh, I think You're hot, uh will you, uh go out with me?
Billy: uh...I guess so.
Misty: YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
Ash: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Misty kisses Billy*
Everyone except Ash: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Ash: How am I ever gonna let her see that- uh never mind.
Cid: Whatever you wanted to do, you can do in part 5!
Ash: Good point! None of these episodes have featured Pokemon yet, anyway! *The Xenogears characters arrive*
Elly: Well, I have a good idea. Let's punt Yuffie to Jupiter!
Fei: Good idea! *Climbs in his gear and kicks Yuffie out of party- literally*
Yuffie: AWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!! I wanted to stay!
Aeris and Tifa: can't say I'll miss her.....
Barret: Thank god she's gone....
Cid: Yeah, things can't get wild with her gone.............or can they?
Margie: I really don't want to know.....
Bart: Who started all this, anyway?
Cloud: It was all Sephiroth's fault, I swear!
Everyone: Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuure........
Fei: Next time, we've gotta get Cloud and emotion control device...........AND NO, I DON"T USE THE ONE CITAN GAVE ME ANYMORE!!!!!! I SWEAR!!!!!!
Everyone: Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure.........
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To be continued.............