The RPG Party- Part 5: Everyone Wants Misty ---------------------------------
Featuring Brock, Ash, Gary, James, Billy, and Misty
Fei: Hmmm, looks like things have significantly quieted down since I punted Yuffie.
Aeris: If you ask me, things are tooooo quiet......
From the doorway: I agree!
Misty: BROCK!!!!!!!!!!! YOU CAME!!!!!!!!!!! *Runs over and hugs Brock*
Billy: Uh, Misty, aren't we together?
Brock: SHIT!!!!!
Everyone: What?
Brock: I was gonna ask Misty if- just *&$#^ forget it!
Elly: My, Misty sure seems to be popular tonight.....
Misty: Moi? That's cause I'm adorable! *Gives an 'oh I'm so cute' grin*
Billy, Brock, and Ash: Mmmmmmmmmmm............
Margie: Oh dear.....
Tifa: Perhaps there's going to be too much excitement.
Cloud: EXCITEMENT? I want Yuffie back! *sob*
Everyone: HAHA!!!!! Yuffie Lover! You suck! Haha!
Cloud: Shut the ^&*#$ up!
Cid: *Whispering to Ash* Say Ash, didn't you want to get something done in part 5?
Ash: *Back to Cid* Oh yeah, I guess I did. hehe. *Walks over to center of room* Hey everyone, I have an announcement to make!
Pikachu: Pika! (with me?)
Barret: Is this some %&*#$ love connection show?
Ash: Uh, sort of.......
Maria: Great, just great, I hate that show.....
Ash: Anyway, I picked tonight to proclaim my love to Misty! *starts making kissing sounds*
Cid: &#$&*@!!!!!!! I knew I shouldn't have encouraged him to take a stand!
Billy: You little asshole!!!! How dare you try to take away Misty from me? *Goes over to Ash and starts punching him*
Ash: Owwwww!!!!!!!!!!!
Brock: This is awful! I wanted to marry Misty! *Everyone looks at him in surprise. He goes over and starts attempting to kill Billy*
Bart: Um, ahem......
Margie: STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!! *Runs bravely inbetween the three people fighting* If you guys are going to fight for her, maybe you could continue this outside! And Misty, you go with them.
Misty: When I said I wanted guys to like me, this wasn't what I envisioned.......*Groans as she walks outside, Followed by Brock, Billy, and Ash*
Cid: Thanks a lot! You just &*#$^ ruined another fight we could've watched!
Cloud: I guess we should think of something else to do.
Bart: I have a GREAT Idea!
Everyone: What?
Bart: Strip poker!
Tifa: Wait a minute, what are you &$%#^ guys trying to do to me? *All guys currently present start looking at a certain part of Tifa's body* Hey, stop looking at me!
Elly: I hate strip poker, but seeing as there's nothing else to do......and I don't exactly have any Lara Croft body parts I'd be embarassed about...why not?
Aeris: Um......ok, why not?
Males: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Margie and Maria both look at each other and whisper*
Margie: Maria and I think we're a little young for this game, so we're going to hang out in the remnents of the Yggdrasil.
Maria: Plus, we haven't started puberty, so you guys wouldn't enjoy our, um, features.....
Cid: I'd have to agree, you two are exempted. *Maria and Margie leave*
Cloud: Let's start!
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Meanwhile, Outside
Billy: You guys are gonna get a pounding! *Shoots Ash and Brock*
Brock: No fair! I train pokemon, not fight!
Ash: Pikachu, go! <Pikachu steps forward> Pikachu, Thunderbolt!
Pikachu: PIKACHUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Uses it, Billy falls down sideways*
Billy: you....guys....are......all...........ASSHOLES!!!!!! *gets back up*
Brock: You're a son of a bitch!
Ash: You both drink your own shit!
Misty: Guys, isn't this starting to look a lot like the chick fight from part 3? *Guys adbruptly stop*
Brock: We'd better listen to her, she's the one we're fighting over!
Ash: We'll fight however you want us to, great Misty! *The guys bow to her*
Gary: I want in on the fight, too!
Brock: GARY!!!! You &%*($@^ like Misty, too? NOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Misty: This is starting to scare me....
Billy: Come on sweetie, make it a gun fight.
Gary, Brock, Ash: Honey, make it a pokemon fight!
Misty: Hmmmmm........*Gets evil grin on her face* You guys have to fight with your pokemon-
Billy: I don't have any pokemon!
Misty: Borrow some with that guy over there! *Points at James, who has arrived silently*
Ash: James????
James: I can to see the big fight. He can borrow Wheezing and Meowth if it make the fight dirtier.
Gary: JAMES, YOU SUCK!!!!!
Misty: You guys never let me finish my sentence!
Brock: Sorry Misty, continue.......
Misty: Anyway, You guys have to fight with your pokemon, in your underwear!
Guys: YUCK!!!!!!! I'm not gay!!!!!!!
Misty: Too bad! Oh by the way, only one pokemon per person, bwahahaha!!!!!!!
Cheerleaders: Gary, Gary, he's our man, if he can't win it, nobody can!
Brock, Billy, and Ash: We'll see about that you &^%#$@!!!!!!!!
Misty: The fight for MOI begins RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!! *All guys strip to boxers and get ready to call pokemon*
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Back inside the main room...
Barret: All right loosahs, the cards are dealt out......remember, the loser and anyone that folds have to take off a piece of clothing! *Everyone decides not to fold*
Cloud, Elly, Bart: *Takes two cards*
Cid, Barret: *Takes three cards*
Fei, Aeris: *Takes one card*
Tifa: *Takes five cards*
Cloud: Wow, you must've had a bad hand!
Tifa: Grump, don't remind me.....
Barret: Reveal zee cahds!!!!!!!!!! I have a full house!
Cloud and Aeris: Four of a kind
Fei: Three 6s
Bart: A straight!
Elly: Two queens
Cid: Two 8s
Tifa: Two 4s.......&$#&%^@#$^!!!!!!! This means I've gotta take off something, right?
Everyone: Yup. *Guys start drooling at her...*
Tifa: OK then, I'm gonna take off my- SHOES!!!!!! *Guys groan*
Bart: Aww, man......
Barret: Hand me the &@^@%# cards, time for the next round to start!
-----------------------
Back outside in the fight
Ash: Pikachu, I choose you! *Pikachu comes running forward*
Brock: Vulpix, I choose you! *Comes out of pokeball*
Gary: Dugtrio, I choose you!
Misty: When did you get a dugtrio?
Gary: In the episode where we saved the Digletts, my lady!
Misty: Oh, just wondering. *Decides she really doesn't want Gary to win*
Billy: Uh, how do I call it?
James: Here, I'll do it for you. Wheezing, go! *Wheezing comes out* You've got to obey Billy's commands over there!
Meowth: Or else I'll scratch you!
Brock: Vulpix, Fire Spin on Wheezing!
Vulpix: Vul vul vulpix! *Uses firespin*
Wheezing: Wheez......*Falls over*
Billy: JAMES? What do I &%*$#&* do??
James: Use a potion!
Billy: Ok, here you go wheezing. *Tosses potion on him* Now can I attack?
James: No, you took your turn using a potion.
Billy: &%$*#@!!!!!
Ash: Pikachu, quick attack on Dugtrio!
Pikachu: PIKA!!!!!!!!! *uses it on him*
Dugrtio: Dug dug *Dodges attack*
Ash: How come it didn't affect Dugtrio? AHHHH!!!!
Gary: Pikachu's quick attack is no match for my Dugtrio's speed! Dugtrio,Dig on Pikachu!
Pikachu: *Starts getting dizzy* Pika...........
Ash: Pikachu! No! Stay awake!
Misty: hehehehe, round one is over!
Billy: Who won?
Misty: It's a tie!
Brock: WHAT? I %$&@$ obviously won!
Gary: I thought so too!
Misty: hehe, get ready for round two! Oh, but put on your pants please, I wasn't expecting a certain part of your body to bulge up during a pokemon fight! *Gags and the guys look down*
All guys: EWWW!!!!!!! BUT WE AREN'T GAY!!!!!!! *Put on pants in embarassment*
Misty: All right, five minute break!
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Back inside with the strip poker game
Barret: I have a ROYAL FLUSH!
Cloud: Triple Jacks
Aeris: double Kings
Tifa: single queen
Bart: full house
Elly: double 8s
Fei: quadruple 2s
Tifa: WAIT A MINUTE!!!!!!!!! I LOST AGAIN!!!!!!
Barret: Hehe guess so
Tifa: &$%#$!!!!!! Why am I the ONLY person who has lost? I've taken off my shoes, socks, and shirt, now I've gotta take off my pants and sit around in my underwear! Is this rigged?
Cloud: Uh, well, um, hehe, well.....
Tifa: I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr *socks Cloud in the stomach*
Cloud: Ouch! *coughs up blood*
Elly: Guys, that is so unfair! I won't play if you keep making Tifa lose on purpose.
Aeris: Me either!
Cid: Ok, ok, we'll &*#$^@ play fairly.
Barret: Hand me the cards, and we'll start the next round!
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Outside at the fight
Misty: OK, time for round two! For this round, you've gotta pick a new pokemon, and you each get two turns!
Brock: We have to pick a different pokemon! &%$#@*&@%!!!!!
Misty: Just beepin shut up and pick another pokemon. *Clearly is enjoying her popularity*
Ash: Bulbasaur, I choose you!
Brock: Geodude, I choose you!
Gary: Charmander, I choose you!
Billy: Uh, do you have any other pokemon, James?
James: Uh, Meowth....
Meowth: No! I don't wanna fight! Help help help!
James: *Whispering to Meowth* You've got to stir up a good fight! Round one sucked!
Meowth: OK, whatever......*Goes to Billy*
Misty: Now, start!
Ash: Bulbasaur, use your razor leaf attack on Geodude!
Geodude: *Gasps for air* Geo.........
Brock: No fair! Geodude, defend!!!!!
Gary: Charmander, ember on bulbasaur!
Bulbasaur: ugh...*Burns*
Ash: Bulbasaur, remain strong!!!
Billy: Uh, whatever your name is, do whatever you want.
Meowth: Grrrrr.........*Starts using scratch attack on every single pokemon over and over again*
James: Go, Meowth! This is what I call a fight!! *Meowth continues for another minute until all the other pokemon are completely destroyed*
Ash: BULBASAUR!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gary: CHARMANDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brock: GEODUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All 3: &@*^%*@$^%&@*%^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Misty: Looks like I get to announce this round's winner
Billy: Me of course! *Starts grinning and clapping*
Misty: Actually, it's a tie!
Everyone: &$%*^#@!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gary: Does anyone here think Misty is enjoying watching us more than actually wanting a boyfriend
Misty: hehe....
Brock: MISTY!!!
Ash: Brock, she may not like us, but we like her!
Brock: Good point!
Misty: Round three begins in 10 minutes!
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With Margie, Maria, and Chu-chu in the Yggdrasil
Margie: Ha! Looks like I just won speed for the 10th time in a row!
Maria: But I won war 15 times perviously!
Chu-chu: Both of chu are very impressive.
Margie: What games haven't we played?
Maria: Hmm, we've played spit, speed, war, chowder, bloody knuckles, bullshit, egyptian rat screw, slap jack, I think that covers just about everything we know....
Chu-chu: Chu play a lot of card games!
Margie: We haven't played poker yet.
Maria: Ugh, I don't even want to think about poker, after remembering that they're playing strip poker in the main room of the cabin.
Margie: Yeah, it sucks being some of the youngest kids here.
Maria: So, what should we do?
Chu-chu: Chu could watch the pokemon fight for Misty.
Margie: Actually, that sounds pretty fun.
Maria: Come on Margie, let's go! *Both start running for the 'battlefield'*
Chu-chu: Have fun, chu guys!
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Back in strip poker
Barret: Oh damn, looks like I lost in this round! Guess I have to take off boxers *takes off boxers*
Aeris: Yikes! He's naked!
Cid: Well, most of use have been &$#%# naked for a long time!
Tifa: Yeah really! It's getting pretty annoying, having to %#$@ cover myself!!!! *all guys have been staring at her the entire time, except Fei*
Bart: How is it you haven't managed to lose, Aeris?
Aeris: Beginner's luck, I guess.
Cloud: Lucky! If I lose again, I have to discard my sword, which is the only thing covering me!
Fei: *to Elly* oooooh, you look great when you're naked.
Elly: You too, Fei! You look soooooooooo sexy!
Fei: Ooooh, you're getting me turned on, Elly.
Elly: mmmmm, me too!
Fei: Oh, I want you, I want you!
Elly: I'm starting to get sweaty! *Gives Fei a kiss*
Barret: Um, author?
Mystery Author: Yes?
Barret: If you keep broadcasting what they're doing on paper, won't you have to rate this an R?
Mystery Author: Whoops. We'll just say they're doing what they're doing and leave it at that. *leaves*
Cid: Oh, my god, I'm starting to get turned on!
Bart: Me too!
Cloud: Same here?
Tifa: By what?
Cid, Cloud, Bart: BY YOU NAKED!!!!!!! *Close on Tifa*
Tifa: EEEEKKKKK!!!!!!!!!! RAPE!!!!!!!!!! *runs away with three horomone crazy guys following her*
Cloud: I decided I really do like you, Tifa!
Tifa: %$@@$*^!!!!!!!!! *Runs into the bathroom and locks it*
Bart: Shit, she's gone!
Cid: Oh well, we have to keep playing until everyone is naked right Fei and Elly?
Fei and Elly: *completely don't hear*
Cloud: Fei? Elly?
Fei and Elly: *It has been determined that if the author wrote the truth of what was happening, the government would sue her, she'd go temporarily insane, and would be forced to die an evil death in the electric chair*
Aeis: Oh, leave them alone, all of us still here and not distracted can continue playing!
Barret: Good. Now *(@$^*&@^%* hand me the cards!
-------------------------------
Back at the pokemon fight
Misty: Round three is now beginning!
Ash: Pidgiotto, I choose you!
Brock: Onix, I choose you!
Gary: Eevee, I choose you!
Billy: I choose whatever James has left.
James: Here, take Lickatung. Lickatung, I choose you!
Ash: Pidgiotto, use your gust attack on everyone!
All other pokemon: *Are blown away, then return and hit the ground hard*
Billy: Likatoung, do something! *Somehow manages to make Eevee's brains ooze out*
Eevee: *drops to the ground dead, but Gary doesn't notice*
Misty: Uh Gary? Your pokemon just dropped dead on the floor. Uh, Gary?
Ash: Wow, Brock is out of it too! I wonder what they're looking at...... *Maria and Margie appear*
Margie: Hey guys!
Maria: We came to watch you all fight for Misty!
Misty: It appears the fight has stopped.
Brock: Oooooh, Margie, you're soooooooooooo fine! *drools*
Margie: Um, OK.....
Gary: Wow, Maria, I love you! And you're near my age!
Maria: *To Margie* they're scaring me!
Margie: *To Maria* Yeah. What do you say we throw them out?
Maria: Good idea! *Lifts up Gary* PREPARE TO DIE!!!!!!
Margie: *Pinches Brock and manages to lift him up* YOU TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Both throw their respective guys, well, somewhere*
Misty: You guys are strong!
Margie: Thank you, thank you *bows*
Ash: Looks like only you and I are left, Billy.
Billy: I intend to keep my girl!!! Now, we're fighting! WITHOUT these $%&#$* pokemon!!!!! *Pulls out his gun at Ash*
James: HOOT HOOT!!!!! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!!!!!
Maria: Yuck, this looks ugly.....
Margie: No kidding.....
Ash: Uh-oh *Just as he's about to faint, a jeep is heard approaching. Two people walk out of it.*
Jessie: James! What are you doing here?
James: &*^%@*&!!!! Shit! You found me!
Jessie: You're late for your blue haired people anonymous meeting! Hurry up! *Drags him into jeep*
James: Uh, bye everyone..... *A second figure emerges*
Ramsus: BILLY!!!!!!! You're delaying us! Stop that *@($! Fight!!!!!
Billy: Why?
Ramsus: We're late for our white-haired people anonymous meeting!
Billy: STOP REMINDING ME THAT I HAVE @#%%@! white hair!!! And I hate being the youngest member!
Margie: Hehe, now I have something to blackmail you with, Billy!
Ramsus: *drags Billy to jeep* Sephiroth and me don't like you being a no show!
Billy: Oh @&*%(^@, now I lost the Misty contest! *Jeep leaves*
Maria: Looks like Ash has won by default....
Ash: Huh? I won? Oh yeah! I did win! All right! I outclassed the competition!
Misty: Ash, you won by default......
Ash: Who cares? I got Misty, I got Misty- wait, what am I saying? I can't tell anyone I like Misty! NOOO!!!!!! *He and Pikachu run inside* Hey guys, I-
Misty, Maria, and Margie: *Follow him inside* Eww, everyone is naked and asleep!
Ash: Oh my god!!!!!!!!! *Runs out*
Misty: Sigh, what a crazy boyfriend......
Maria: Well, seeing as the three of us are the only sane members left, how about we end this episode?
Margie: Yeah, really. Maybe part 6 will be a bit less sick....
Misty: God, I sure hope so!
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To be continued.......