After 4000 years of war, the Arm Commander, sitting down for lunch finally realised that it really was true. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't cut anything on his plate with the knife in his left hand. Now that the dispute had finally been settled (the whole idea of a war over patterning was just some stupid historians' fevered imagination playing up) after 4000 years of bloody conflict, he felt a bit guilty about rudely sucking up so many Core corpses just to spite them. And then spitting them out into some huge plasma gun, when he knew how obsessed the Core were with manners.
Immediately, he phoned up the Core Supreme Commander, apologised for the grave misunderstanding, and arranged to have lunch with him sometime (the Core Commanders sister was one of the best looking metal suits this side of the Andromeda Galaxy, and the silver look was in this year!).
The two Commanders quickly became best friends and had regular Quake sessions to ease any tensions they felt. Unfortunately for the Arm Commander (now known as King überfrag XIV), his nemesis beat him every time they played (hey, you know the computer always cheats). So the one time he managed to get the rocket launcher first, it was with great glee that he clicked the button that would send fiery death winging his opponents way. Joyously anticipating the ridiculously overstated carnage that would surely follow, when the computer crashed 1 second too soon, his temple only just avoided popping out of his head, destroying the battlesuit he wore and likely taking his house with it in an immense explosion.
Gradually, however, as the red cleared from his vision, his heart stopped thumping, and a group of Arm technicians finished constructing a geothermal powerplant on him to tap the steam emanating from his head, he realised that his computer (now D-gunned into small, frightened-looking atoms) had not been sacrificed in vain - it had given him an idea.
As soon as he could manage a coherent sentence, he quickly declared war on the Core once again. Searching through ancient Arm records, he finally came across what he had been looking for - a piece of software so lethal, and yet so seemingly innocent that even the mighty Arm Commander himself was terrified to clone the creator of such an efficient weapon. Knowing, however, that no other mind in existence could be devious enough to manipulate the malicious killing machine in mind, he gritted his teeth and did what had to be done. Gates 00000001 (this was the first time in history he had ever been cloned, and the Arm Commander hoped to god that it would never be necessary to duplicate him again) was born.
The Commanders plan was brilliant. As a sort of Trojan horse, he would offer the Core an improved method of patterning as a recompense for starting yet another bloody war that had decimated both civilisations. Secretly however, he would be infecting them with the weapon! (OK, maybe brilliant was overstating it).
Everything went according to plan - the Core were dead chuffed (I've always wanted to use that phrase) with their new toy, and used it so much that soon all their warriors were patterned by it. The time to strike was now…
The Gates clone had been born without any of the knowledge of his former self, having to rely on Arm records for information. But as he booted up his adopted child, he was struck with an evil glee, which felt startlingly familiar. For some reason - he didn't know why - he had decided to call it "Wendose".
As his fingers ran across the keyboard, activating the program, he cackled insanely. The Arm Commander looked at him nervously, but was committed now.
"Initiate stage one," he said.
Gates pushed the power up to 3.0. A zipper rushed into the room;
"Its working," he cried, "they're wobbling about all over the place!"
"Increase power!" The Arm commander ordered…
Gates increased it first to 3.1. The monitor in front of him showed Core soldiers walking into several walls. Ecstatically, he again increased the power to 3.11. The soldiers started tripping over each other hitting their heads. Still Gates lusted for more power. Before anyone could stop him, he pushed it all the way up to 95, with a corresponding increase in effect. The Core Kbots started ripping limbs off each other, if only to batter themselves into unconsciousness.
The Arm Commander, not normally a compassionate man, could bear it no longer;
"Stop it!", he shouted knowing that he could not reach the console in time to stop the gates clone from pushing the power up again… He did so, all the way up to 98, and every Core unit exploded violently. He shouted;
"I've done it! The universe is mine again, Bwahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!!!"
Fortunately, this time there was someone around who could step on him….