In Defense of an Insane Man
Yes it is indeed my opinion that I could very well be insane. Not just mildly but quite out of my mind. At times I feel Manic and other times I can be quite Depressed. Yet lately I've been coming to a balanced state of being that I can only call Poetic. In truth I was always a poet before I was a writer and thus my literature suffers badly for it. In fact the very thoughts in my mind are so scattered that poetry is perhaps my own real form of communication. When ever I do say something within the context of prose it either seems ludicrous or profound. So its really a toss of the dice in whether you will truly understand me or not. The thing of it is I actually realize that what I say is not all too linear and I'm quite disconnected in the form of communication. What can I say, I talk through installation. As it is I also get massive needs to suddenly express great amounts of information on certain topics I see rather clearly. Because of this my website is almost always under construction and because of that my erratic speach suffers ever the more so because of spelling errors and the like. As for my life I can only say that I've always been a transitional thinker. My mind would kind of skip about on various concepts and what many called talking in circles I seen as thinking in a general direction that would eventually come to a conclusion. Recently after three years of one of these typical episodes I've come to such a conclusion. That conclusion is that I must be mentally geared to be a Chaote. One who thinks clearly in chaotic and magickal theoretics and expresses this form of thinking through living a magickally enhanced life which I do. Which freaks people out ever the more so since most people wouldn't know the first thing about real magick and for those who think they do they tend to be so wrapped around one belief that they cannot conceive of anything beyond their limited vision. For one who literally thinks poeticly I was naturally first at home in Chaos Magick and thus thinking normally in what I refer to as hallucinagenic perception, at certain times only, I was able to side step a great deal of mental traps and sort of formed my own free form of philosophy and magickal style. This of course heavily convinces everyone I attempt to discuss this with that I'm quite out of my mind. Some even consider me weak and attempt to control me. The thing of it is I'm quite at ease in my style of thinking and am magickally prepared because of my continual practice in dream world paradigmas or in actual dream states to do anything that needs to be done. What amuses me about this whole set up is how accurately my horoscope describes me. I'm a Sunsign: Pisces and a Moonsign: Libra and my Ascendant is Aries. You can do your own research on the subject but lets just say it puts together some rather odd energies. Well I could go on and on about myself but I'm sure I've frightened you enough for now.
Oh and I go by a great deal of names but my personal favorites are Nixzilch Jahfrick if referring to me generally and Lyadradaydelvoid if referring to me on a magickal subject. Feel free to wander around this web site. If you like watching a volcanoe erupt into chaos then you will probably enjoy watching what happens around this website, especially if you enjoy chaos.
