Torner awoke with a strange tingling sensation pulsing all over his body. That's odd Maybe I'm not dead? The most peculiar sensation was in his head however. It was as if his brain was physically humming, vibrating with some inner energy. Slowly, he raised his hand to his head. Nope. It wasn't really vibrating. He stared at his hand. It should have been crushed. As well as his arm. Raising up on elbows, he glanced down at his body. Everything looked in place. No missing parts. And nothing pointed in the wrong direction. He had half expected to look down and see his butt facing on the wrong side, or a leg bent at angles not humanly possible. But everything looked quite as it should.
Then he noticed where he was. A brisk breeze ruffled his hair and whistled down a rocky pass. He sat atop a mountain. Not the Windpipes. This was just one single, majestic mountain. The sky sparkled a bright azure blue and the sun rose steadily from the horizon. Far below, hilly forests surrounded the mountain as far as the eye could see. Torner thought he heard the chiming of bells from somewhere below.
"A shock isn't it? Takes a bit of getting used to."
Torner turned to the sound and frowned. He could have sworn that there hadn't been anyone up here a moment ago. An elderly elf smiled warmly and walked easily over the rocky terrain towards Torner. Torner wasn't sure if the elf meant where he was or how he felt, so he just nodded knowingly.
"Spectacular exit, you know. Good show. Most people don't even try that these days. Tackling a dragon single-handedly. Much too pragmatic these folks of today. No guts, no glory, I always say. Ah, Torner. You'll be talked about for quite some time to come. I think they're going to raise a statue of you."
The elf mumbled to himself for a moment and looked in the distance.
"...Hmmm, hope Jardon does the work. He's the only one decent with a chisel in that town."
"Um, pardon me..." Torner screwed his face up.
He had no idea what the old elf was babbling on about.
"You know Torner, people make their own Heaven..."
The elf appraised the mountain and nodded his head thoughtfully.
"...Nice. Especially the chimes. Good touch. It's the details that catch most people out."
Torner cleared his throat uncomfortably. This was a very odd conversation. The mention of heaven made his stomach tumble and churn. He was still trying to get his bearings - but something seemed mighty amiss.
"Sir, excuse me, I don't mean to seem rude. But you know me? Have we met before? And where exactly are we?"
The elf frowned.
"Oh, Torner. Don't play stupid with me. How can you be so physically brave and so thoughtfully cautious at the same time? You thought this place up. Not me. Obviously something in there,.." the elf paused and tapped on Torner's forehead, "...is telling you where you are. You're just not listening. Quit trying to be so logical all the time. Life's not logical. Hmmm, neither is the afterlife, for that matter."
"Oh."
Torner took a good look at the elf. He stood there on the mountaintop, calm and collected. Regal. He seemed elderly, but yet, his dark eyes twinkled like those of a child. The elf raised one thin, black brow.
"Your...Oh my God."
"Yes, exactly. Did you think I would actually be purple?.."
Violet Elf gave a slight bow to Torner.
"...I knew you'd catch on, ole boy."
Old? Who was He to be calling him old? Time to change that line of thought. No telling what a deity read in someone's thoughts.
"Did I get the dragon?"
"Well, lets just say that you did the major portion of the job and the beast now lies rotting in the streets of Bottomburn. They're gonna be selling dragon steaks and wings for a long time. Of course, coal dragons are the not best tasting. Reds though, mmmmm, they're really nice with a bit of Lea & Perrins dashed on them and served up with a dash of horseradish sauce. Tasty. But stay away from the green ones. Not ripe yet."
Violet Elf grinned and laughed as if at a private joke. Torner looked around. It seemed real enough to him.
"So. This is my world?"
"Yep. Every person has their own personal view of what Heaven is like. Who am I to tell them different? You should see what some of them come up with..." He chuckled. "...Of course, some of them could use a course or two in home decor. Usually it's the men that have the worst taste. Can't match colours if they only had one to pick from..."
The deity glanced at Torner.
"..No offense intended, of course."
"None taken."
Violet Elf glided pass Torner. A path appeared before His feet. He motioned for Torner to follow.
"What now? It's pretty. And peaceful. But..."
Torner gazed at the mountain.
"It's boring?" The Elf offered.
"Um, yes. No offense intended."
"None taken. It's your Heaven."
The man and Elf smiled at one another.
"Come with me."
"Where are we going?"
"Oh - to meet some other people. Drink. Laugh. Then it's time to get down to business."
"Business? In Heaven?"
"Hey, this just doesn't run all by itself you know..."
Violet Elf waved his slender hand at the beauty around him.
"..You think it - and I create it. But for now, it's time for your induction."
Torner did a double take at the Elf. This was totally different than he had thought it would be. Somehow, the priests back in Bottomburn had never mentioned just exactly what Heaven was all about. Induction? His induction? Without missing a beat, Violet Elf answered his unspoken question.
"Why yes. 'Above and beyond the call of duty,' and all that rot. You're going to join my legion of paladins."
"Legion? A legion of paladins? That's, that's..."
"Incredible? How about a passel of paladins?" The Elf started laughing.
"I'm going to be a paladin again ?"
Torner smiled and looked up at the Elf. He could have sworn a moment before that he had been taller than the Elf. Violet Elf draped an arm over Torner's shoulder.
"Yes. A paladin again."