It seems like the Jerry Springer Show is the one place you don't have to be politically correct on Daytime television. In Honour of Jerry, we've created a drinking game about his show

 Drink when...

• the show resembles a pro-wrestling match
• a guest is seriously deformed (no arms or legs, 50 lb baby)
• Someone wants to work in the sex industry
• Someone wants to be nude on the show
• Bisexual love triangle
• Someone is sleeping with their lover's best friend
• Someone is sleeping with their aunt or other family member
• The story is really complex and you get confused... 2 drinks if the people involved are confused
• Someone has more than one wife
• Guests are southern
• Someone throws chair
• Someone leaves the stage because they're pissed off
• Someone gets in someone's face
• Someone gives flowers
• Said flowers are used as a weapon
• Someone is gay
• Someone is really a man
• Someone has an affair
• The show is somewhat exploitative
• Someone is pregnant... 2 drinks if she fights... 4 drinks if someone brings up the fact that she's pregnant and fighting (3 drinks if it's Jerry)
• A family doesn't get along
• Someone strips... 2 drinks if it's in front of a disapproving friend, lover or family member... 4 drinks if it's a bachelor party show!
• You hear a censor's beep
• The crowd yells "Jerry! Jerry!"(1 drink per Jerry)
• There's a fight. One drink per security guard on-stage
• Bodyguards are slow to stop the fight
• Guests are hard to understand
• Someone sings at the end/ there's a Jerry rap
• Jerry retreats into the audience to avoid being hurt
• Jerry makes fun of his guests
• Jerry's guests don't know he's doing it
• Satanism is featured
• Guests are uneducated morons
• There are prostitutes and pimps featured
• A nude woman gets covered by her lover
• A marriage proposal
• Someone dumps someone on the show
• There's a confrontation
• Incest
• Secrets are unveiled
• Steve sits on stage
• Guest says "Hi! Jerry!" after coming on to a fight
• A man suggests a threesome when his lover admits to having a lesbian affair
• All lesbian show!
• Jerry is repeatedly interrupted by a mouthy guest
• A guest walks off stage
• A mother protects her (slutty?) daughter by attacking pimp/boyfriend
• Dominatrix w/ slave on show: 1 drink per allowance (slave can sit, talk, etc.)
• Someone finds out their lover is having an affair, and doesn't care because they're hot and can easily find a replacement
• Guzzle if someone is intelligently shocked for having a secret admitted to them on national tv
• Jerry sits down (stage or audience) and just waits for things to blow over
• Someone is "taking care of business" by having an affair
• Lesbian love triangle
• An ultimatum is given on the show
• Jerry asks when two people were last "together"... 2 drinks if if was last night... 3 drinks if they mention that Jerry paid for it... 4 drinks if the show is about an affair, and the cheater was with both
• Jerry says "I'll let you two talk"
• After hearing about the affair, the lover isn't surprised at who it is... 2 drinks if they also admit to having an affair with this same person
• You wonder if these people are just having sex all day -how else could you explain the situation
• Guests are strippers, or work in the sex industry
• The show is about cheating
• You wonder how men can't possibly know their lover is a transsexual...2 drinks if they've been "intimate"
• Someone proposes marriage...2 drinks if they've been dating for less than a month
• The word "confront" is used
• Someone uses the word Bitch...2 drinks if this is a form of address
• Screeching
• Nothing is resolved
• Crowd pumps their fists...2 drinks if they are yelling "Jerry!"
• Someone wants to rub Steve's head
• Someone gets naked
• Having breasts is used in an argument (Well...I have boobs!)
• Someone in the audience "gets their t*ts out" whilst yelling at a member of the panel
• Breast size is an issue
• a white supremacist says he's not racist
• Klan members are not Aryan
• they look like uneducated morons
• they have raised their kids in the klan
• there's a Klan indoctrination on the show.

Drink whenever you see one of the following ads during Springer:

• Career College
• Celphone/pager company
• Dial-a-lawyer (2 drinks if his last name is Shapiro)
• Another talk show
• Weight loss program
• Bally Total Fitness
• Unclaimed freight warehouse
• Insurance company (any type)
• a Psychic hotline
• A rental center

1999 andromedastraine