John, dressed in only his maroon bathrobe sneaks down to the lake and spies Marlena luxuriating in a small pool of water. His eyes seem to engulf her beauty and the lust for her is clearly read in his eyes. She seems oblivious to all around her as she glides through the water. She holds her breath and goes beneath the water. John watches for moments, then becomes concerned.
John: Marlena...Marlena...
His voice becomes frantic when she doesn't come up.
John: Marlena!
He tears off his bathrobe and dives into the pool. He is under for moments then pops to the surface, his voice is almost hysterical...
John: Doc!!???
He dives again and moments later resurfaces holding Marlena, they both gasp for air. Marlena looks shocked.
John: When you dove in and didn't come back up I thought you might have hit your head on a rock or something, are you ok?
Marlena: Yeah, fine, fine (she says softly, a slow smile on her face)
John: Good...Thank God. Thank God, you had me scared.
They stare into each other's eyes and the love and the
lust is clearly seen. John catches his breath and Marlena fearlessly and
tenderly touches his jawline with her fingertips. Music begins to play
as they swirl around and around together in the water. Their lips brush,
then as Marlena's arms go around John's neck he kisses her neck and she
closes her eyes to the ecstasy. They gaze into each other's eyes again
and he touches her cheek with the back of his hand, until they melt into
a slow, exploring kiss that erupts into a fiery, passionate kiss. They
pull back slowly with heated eyes and stare at each other. Marlena fingertips
caress his jawline as they drift in the water. John's hand caresses her
neck and his fingers follow to her cheek, as she starts to reach for his
face he grabs her hand and passionately kisses her palm. John seems to
come to his senses, knowing where this passion is leading.
John: We've got to get out of this water...
Then he swims to the edge, Marlena almost looks disappointed as she follows him. He takes her forearm and pulls her from the water. His eyes seem to devour her naked flesh as she shivers and he wraps his robe around her.
Marlena: Thank you...
John: Hey, you're shivering..
Marlena: It's cold...
John smiles, mischievously.
John: Didn't seem too cold in the water...
Marlena: It's a hot spring...
John grins, slyly.
John: Is that what it was...
Marlena: Mmmmm, yes. I'll get this..
She takes her robe from him, takes off his robe and dresses back in her own. John's eyes seem to glow as he watches her undress and dress.
John: A little late in the season to go skinnydippin, isn't it?
Marlena: Well, I was burning up, so I came down here...
John: It's a beautiful place...
Marlena: Beautiful night...
John's face turns serious.
John: You're beautiful, Doc...
He rubs the back of his hand along her cheek. He tenderly takes her face in his hands and kisses her slowly, then more passionately, then suddenly pulls back wincing and putting his forehead against hers.
John: I'm sorry...
Marlena: It's alright...
John: I'm sorry, it's NOT all right, I swore I'd never let this happen again.
Marlena: It's all right...
John: No, it's not. I shouldn't be touching you, I shouldn't be kissing you, I shouldn't be here...
Marlena: No...
John: Doc, I'm going to ruin your life. What kind of a man am I? I'm going to destroy both of our lives and I can't stop myself...
Marlena: No, it's not your fault, it's mine...
John: You're doing everything in your power to keep me away from you, you're doing everything in your power to be faithful to Roman...
Marlena looks crestfallen.
Marlena: I willed this. I willed you to come here...
John looks astonished.
John: You what?
Marlena looks ashamed.
Marlena: I willed it, I knew you were with Rebecca so I...I couldn't stand it. (Softly cries) I couldn't. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...
Marlena sobs quietly and turns away, unable to face John. John has almost a smile, a wry, questioning almost satisfied smile on his face. John tenderly touches her shoulders.
John: What are you talking about, Doc? I'm the one who came here. Rebecca was asleep, I wasn't tired so...
Marlena: You went to the window to get some night air and you saw me in the lake...as I knew you would, and I knew if you saw me here you'd be drawn to me, so I stayed. I undressed and I waited...
John: How'd you know?
Marlena: Roman and I were lying in bed and I heard you and Rebecca laughing and having a good time. I knew when the laughter stopped you'd begin to make love...I couldn't bare that and I knew I had to get away from that room...
John: I'm sorry, Doc. I didn't have any idea...
Marlena: I knew I had no right to be jealous of those sounds. Roman was asleep and the room was so quiet (she whispers, sadly) except for those sounds. I thought if I, if I just got some cool air and water, I'd be all right...
John: So are you? (he whispers, concerned)
Marlena: No! No, it was awful, all I could think of was you...the way it would feel to have your hands on my body, to have you make love to me again like you were making love to Rebecca...
John closes his eyes in silent remembrance as she continues.
Marlena: ...and I was wild, I was desperate...I was...
John: Oh, Doc...
Marlena: I know you so well..
She stares intently in his eyes, both of them clearly in pain.
Marlena: I know your body so well. I know what your body's like after you make love. I know you're sooooo hot. I knew you would come to the window for some air, you always did...and I hoped you would see me and I hoped you would come down and find me. I willed it. I'm sooo ashamed, I'm so sorry...(she sobs)
John puts his hand to her throat and caresses her.
John: Don't do this to yourself...
Marlena turns away.
Marlena: Oh, God. I really have to face it...you've been so good about it and all. All I've done is push you away, I've told you to stay away, I tried to drive you into somebody else's arms...now, the moment that you're with her, I couldn't bear it, so I tried to coax you back. I tried to will you back, (whispers) I tried to seduce you back..(sobs lightly) Oh, oh God, I'm so ashamed...
John looks at her crying with such pain in his face, she turns away from him unable to face him. His face shadows her pain as he moves behind her and wraps her in his arms. He hugs her and holds her, gently rocking her.
John: Don't you cry, Doc. You've done nothing to be ashamed about...
Marlena: I feel like I'm losing my mind. I'm a psychiatrist and I don't know how to handle this...(sobs)
John: Come on, listen to me, how can you think like a psychiatrist when your own feelings are so confusing...
Marlena: Why do we keep doing things that we know are wrong...why do we do it????
John: I don't know, I don't, all I know is that staying away from you is the hardest thing I've ever had to do...
Marlena: It's the hardest thing I've had to do too...
Pauses, then smiles wryly.
John: We're not superhuman are we? We're just mortals,
just plain old ordinary everyday human beings with confusing, conflicting
emotions that go with being a human being.
Marlena: I can't excuse myself that easily..
John: Oh, come on...
Marlena: I mean it! If I don't stop, I will destroy all of us, I will destroy Roman, I will destroy the children. I just have to stop this, I just have to control this somehow...
John: You will Doc, because you're right, if you don't, it will destroy you and I won't let that happen... because I love you too much...
Marlena turns to face John with love in her eyes and whispers...
Marlena: John...What are we going to do?
John: We're just going to have to face the fact that we have a love that's never going to die and we can't go on pretending it's not there any longer...
Marlena: I know you're right...
John: That's why we have to accept this love between us as a fact. Once we do that we can go on with our lives. But we can never act on our feelings again. We're going to have to fight it, it's going to be hard, but we're going to have to fight it whenever those feelings overwhelm us...
Marlena: How many times have we made that pledge...and how many times have we broken it?
She turns away again.
John: We're going to keep that pledge, Doc. It's going to start tonight, it's got to, it's gonna start right here.
John moves behind her and wraps his arms lovingly around her.
John: It's got to..(he whispers)
He rubs his hand lightly up and down her arms.
Marlena: Thank you, for helping me get through this..
John smiles slowly.
John: Think the crisis is over?
Marlena: Well, the fever has passed.
John: How about the guilt?
Marlena: No, the guilt will never disappear, it will be with me all my life.
John: Doc, you know we're both just trying to do what's right here.
Marlena: I know, it's true. I think you are more innocent than anybody in this.
John raises his eyebrow and asks.
John: What makes you say something like that?
Marlena: Because, because you were robbed of your past.
Somebody thrust you into this,
and said that you were my husband and you fell in love
with me and the children and we became your life. And then, one day, with
no warning, it was all yanked away from you.
John: You know Doc, if Roman never came back, I never would have found out I wasn't your husband, we'd still be a family and I'd still be in love with you.
Marlena looks confused.
Marlena: But, you loved Isabella, didn't you?
John: Yes, I loved Izzy B with all my heart, Doc, but my love for her never took away my feelings for you. I know she's listening right now and watching us. I know she knows what I'm talking about.
Marlena: Well then you must know that she would never want us to hurt Roman or hurt the children. She would want us to be strong...
John: That's right. I'm trying to be, Doc. I'm trying real hard. Wanna know something? I think it's working.
Marlena: Is it?
John: I mean, after all, here I am, wanting you. But just like you Doc, fighting it. That's what we got to do, Doc, keep fighting.
Marlena: I know, I know you're right.
Marlena sighs and looks toward the stars.
Marlena: So many stars, it's a shame we can't see all these stars from the city. Can you point out "her" star?
John looks up smiling.
John: I don't know, I never had so many to choose from.
Give me a sec. Yeah. There's
Izzy B's, there it is, the brightest one...
Marlena's eyes fill with tears.
Marlena: Well Isabella, if you're watching us, I would like to reassure you...that...we are just having a moment...(sobs quietly)..That's all and we will get through it.
Marlena sighs and looks back at John.
Marlena: I think she helped us.
John: I think so.
Marlena's tears are falling down her cheeks.
Marlena: I think we should go.
John: Just one more moment, I just want to remember tonight,
I just want to remember what it feels like to hold you again. Because I
will never be with you like this ever again.
John takes her face, ever so gently in his hands and
kisses her so tenderly with tears in both of their eyes.
Marlena: Oh....
Marlena's tears fall, but she has a radiant, love filled
expression. They both sob lightly as John hugs her and she hugs back.
