Several weeks after the monkeys first met Fatty, and had mastered the art of Dung Fu, they needed to defeat a villain. They were looking everywhere they could think of to find one. They looked under the cushions of their sofa, in the toilet, under the refrigerator, and behind the sink, but all they could find was mildew.So, feeling somewhat disappointed, they sat down to watch some TV. The news was on. it showed a giant warthog rampaging through the city. "Change it, this show is never interesting," Slayer said.
"Wait, this could be our big break!" Virus exclaimed.
"I don't want to break anything," Phil said quietly.
"We must crush his bones into bitesize pieces!" yelled Slayer.
"An give him multiple hemorrhages!" shouted Bloode.
"Now, now, there is no need to resort to violence," Phil suggested. "We could work it out-"
"Shut up! Of course there is need to resort to violence!" Slayer yelled. "How else are we going to crush his bones into tiny bitesize pieces?"
"And give him multiple hemorrhages?" Bloode added.
"No," Phil said, "what I mean is, that we don't need to crush his bones into tiny bitesize pieces, or give him multiple hemorrhages; we can reason things out with him."
"We need to severely injure this monstrosity, so that we can become well known! Then we could become famous!" Virus yelled.
"Yeah!" Slayer added. "Then we could have stories, TV shows, or even movies made about us! We could also have action figures, games, and even sugary cereal using our names and likenesses!"
"Maybe," Phil said. "It could happen. After all, those turtles had it happen to them, why not us? And we're not half as ugly."
"Now, about this villain thing. We need to severely injure it or scare it away soon." said Virus.
"How come?"
"We need to severely injure it or scare it away soon, because for the last 22 lines or so have been all dialogue, and this story needs some action." Virus said.
So the four monkeys set out to find the giant warthog. The warthog was a henchman for Xiop Sooey, trying to destroy the city, so Xiop Sooey can take over the world. Xiop Sooey was in America now, because he figured that if he were to take over the world, he would have to start someplace, and America had better hamburgers than Japan. The giant warthog was uprooting buildings, crushing cars, and eating pedestrians. Then the monkeys found him.
"Stop!" Phil shouted to the warthog.
"Yeh, you're starting to annoy me!" Virus added.
"I don't wanna!" the warthog yelled back.
"Then we will have to crush your bones into tiny bitesize pieces," Slayer yelled.
"And give you multiple hemorrhages," added Virus.
"Now guys, let's not resort to violence right away, we could talk it out with him, sort things out," Phil reasoned.
"Oh, Phil! You are so naive! That will never make us famous!" Virus told Phil.
"Come on, you monkey fools! Is there going to be some action in this story, or will it be all dialogue?" the warthog inquired.
"Yeh, let's kick this stinky pig's butt!" Slayer yelled. All of the monkeys attacked simultaneously. Virus pecked the warthog with his chicken, Slayer poked the warthog with his forks, Bloode whacked the warthog with his breadstick, and Phil hit the warthog with his sausage links.
"I give up! You monkeys are too powerful for me!" the warthog screamed as he ran away, to the secret hideout of Xiop Sooey. The warthog arrived, and Xiop Sooey, expecting the city to be destroyed, said "Congratulations, Squatty."
"Um, I didn't destroy it," Squatty (the warthog) said quietly.
"WHAT?!?" Xiop Sooey exploded. "WHY NOT?"
"The monkeys." Squatty said quietly.
"What?"
"The monkeys! They attacked me!" Squatty said loudly, now sobbing.
"Oh. I see. We will have to take care of them, won't we?"
"Yeh, boss!"
"Well, if you can't, maybe Tost can."