Battle of the Bounty Hunters!
By Tink!
tink: and welcome!! to another amazing battle! we're here at the!!!
(looks at lita) the!!!
lita: (sighs) the death dome.
suki: right! and today's battle will be the battle against the bounty
hunters! which show is funnier? cowboy bebop? or outlaw star?
kiki: dunno, never seen either of them.
lita: never?!
kiki: (shakes her head)
gunshot is fired at kiki, but barely misses her.
kiki: gah...
lita: what the hell?!
spike: that's what you get for not watching our shows.
gene: yeah!
tink: but the rest of us have seen them!
barrage of gunshots are fired.
everyone ducks.
gunshots stop.
tink: (gets up) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!??!
gene: for correcting us!!
suki: we didn’t correct you though!! we just merely stated a fact!!
another barrage of gunshots are fired.
everyone ducks, again.
gunshots stop.
lita: *gets up* NOW WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!??!?!
spike: that was for correcting us, and actually correcting us.
tink: *shrugs* makes sense.
suki: mmm-hmm.
kiki: i've still never see-
tink and suki: (cover kiki's mouth.)
lita: let the battle begin!
gunshots are immediately fired.
gene: quick! jim! gimme a number fourteen!
jim: (searches for a number 14) uh, we're all out..
gene: whaddya mean?!
jim: in other words, WE HAVE NONE!!!
gene: crap, gimme a number thirty-two then!
jim: (hands gene a # 32)
kiki: great battle!!!
spike: ed! do your stuff!
ed: (types stuff)
spike: take cover announcer ladies!
lita, suki, tink, kiki: wha?!
announcer ladies take cover.
barrage of bullets come from ceiling.
aisha turns into wolf, and goes after faye.
faye shoots aisha.
aisha keels over and dies.
spike: good shot faye!
suki: she killed aisha!! INCREDIBLE!!!
kiki: i still haven't seen either of these cartoons!
everyone: (await a barrage of bullets)
lita: nothing's happening.
tink: i think they're to busy to care.
suki: (sighs) thank God.
kiki: but!
tink: yes we know you've never seen any of these cartoons!
barrage of bullets come at them.
everyone ducks.
lita: good job tink!
suki: yeah!
tink: it's not my fault she hasn't seen these cartoons!
kiki: it's not my fault i've never seen the cartoons!
suki, tink, lita: YES IT IS!!!
gunshots stop.
everyone gets up.
tink: WHAT?!?! THEY'RE SHAKING HANDS AND BEING FRIENDS?!?
suki: THIS IS BULL SHIT!!! I CAME AND ANNOUNCED SEE A BATTLE!!!
lita: EXACTLY!!!
kiki: i don't get what the big deal is..
gene: (looks up at the announcer's box) we decided to make a peace treaty,
both our shows are equally funny.
tink: WHAT ABOUT AISHA?!?!
spike: they've forgiven us for that, plus we said we'd pay for the
funeral.
lita: well this turned out to be a shit battle.
crowd member: I PAYED FIFTY BUCKS TO SEE THIS BATTLE!! THERE BETTER BE A
BATTLE OR ELSE!!!
crowd becomes enraged and try to tip over the announcer box.
lita: SEE WHAT YOU DID!!!
jim: IT WASN'T OUR FAULT!!
tink: (shrugs) we'll just go down with the ship.
horn plays the death tune.
sun comes out and shines.
suki: looks like the riot mysteriously died... g'night!
tink, lita, suki, kiki: (wave to the camera)