TISM tour comments for Melbourne, 2002


To: thecraplist@yahoogroups.com
From: "Azazel W"  
Date: Fri, 27 Sep 2002 03:40:21 +0000
Subject: [thecraplist] IT"S FRIDAY PAUL!!!!!

Bloody hell.

Greetings, once again, from … er … not so sunny Canberra. Feeling a bit surreal this morning. A bit displaced? Maybe. Sleep deprived? Certainly. Dad has been mucking around with his steroids again and seems to have written a novel. Mum has had me out doing the lawns but I broke the mower. Oops.

Still grinning from ear to ear after seeing Tism last night. As they thundered around the stage wearing enormous stocks (OK, they were frames, but stocks, chains and locks would have been better...slaves to the rhythm ...who the fuck let Grace Jones in??) it became apparent that these guys are going to be doing this for years to come. Never mind the old farts in the audience! I got the distinct feeling that we’re going to be seeing this lot subverting our grandkids.

I’m sorry to say that we got pissy in the carpark on some terrible cooler things (5%!!! We went off!!) before heading into the POW. The gig started fairly low key, in fact a recliner and a cup of milo would have gone down well and maybe a pair of those pointy Dame Edna glasses…sorry. Need sleep. Things progressed nicely , (Yay! They played Club It To Death) and I must say that I’ve never enjoyed another Tism song live more than Dillies Willie Got Caught In Millies Chinchillie (buggered if I remember how it goes). My personal odd point of the show happened half way through when I copped a shoe (sans person) to the breasts. I understand this used to be something of a Ramones’ tradition. Ouch. Ooh, I scored a good swig of whisky and Coke from an unwitting soul too (thanks!!).

The mosh behaved, Ron stayed dressed...where did the designated driver t shirt come from? And the stage show was tight and energetic. I suppose that negated the need for a tockley gimmick. I’m well aware that it is unlikely to remain as such.

So are Tism mere relics of a bygone age? I think not. My newbie friends loved it, and I got to spend a nice half hour relaxing with a seasoned Tism viewer over what was possibly the worst coffee I’ve had in Melbourne so far. In all, the night scored a 10.

Times out! Have fun tonight you bastards.

Staypuft Stanton  

To: thecraplist@yahoogroups.com
From:  "James Herbert"
Date: Thu, 26 Sep 2002 21:51:47 -0700 (PDT)
Subject: Re: [thecraplist] IT"S FRIDAY PAUL!!!!!


I chose to go to the Thursday night show, primarily on the basis that I would actually be able to find a park in St Kilda as opposed to Friday night.  I was pleasantly ripped off $9 in the Prince car park.

The set was pretty much like the Bestoff CD #1. Excellent all rounder.  My GF now has a new favoutite TISM song (being Milli Vanilli (sic)) and the TISM virgin we had in tow was suitably deflowered and defiled and wants more of that hot sweaty TISM pelvic thrusting action.

The Big Props they wore were great - I never really know who was who on stage and the oversized nametags really helped.  Jon St Peenis (oh, you know the mild mannered bass player) has really damned distinct eyebrows to I reckon he'd be easy to spot in Real Life.  He should manicure them to protect his identity.

Ron couldn't resist and shamelessly threw himself at me again, but I won't fall for his attention seeking antics - at least he didn't tread on my face this time.

I didn't end up with a free souvineer like I did at the last TISM gig (you know, one of those muppet tails) so I had to fork out $30 for a 5 Yards T-shirt.

The same 5 fags kept crowd surfing.  2 may or may not have camel bites.

Interesting thing is the my GF and her quivering devirginised friend both concurred that the hidden identity thing plus all the daggy yet cool dancing and antics is sexy.  Not being female I can't get that drift - perhaps it's that Man of Mystery thing that women seem to dig so much.  Ms .45, I know you would have something to say on this matter.  Care to elucidate?

I was thoroughly satisfied with the show and lament how quickly it's all over - though like an episode of the Young Ones, a hell of a lot goes on in the short period of time.  The encore was 4 (or 5?) songs long. Being front right of centre I was rendered a smelly sweaty pig of a man and wandered out at the end grinning like a damned idiot.

I hope they do some more shows like at the Punters though - the small stage brings out the man from behind the facade of cloth, and it's just a whole lot more initmate - OK and we get to laugh at the small penii and feel better about ourselves.  We need a spy at the Evelyn for the low down on not to secret gigs. I too missed that last week by one night.

Anyway, enough of my rants.  Short of TISM being run over on St Kilda Road as they step off the tram on the way to the gig, I don't think there is much chance that tonight won't be really friggin' excellent for those that are going.

8.5/10  (Punters was 10/10 and nowt will top it).


From: "TISM Self Storage"
To: thecraplist@yahoogroups.com
CC: crap@suburbia.com.au
Subject: tism: Apology to Lindsay.

Firstly, I need to apologise to Lindsay Coombs. He tried to tell me to go to the Thursday show, but did I listen? Noooo. "For $28.50 I can buy the new Dictators CD" I said smugly, knowing that TISM play the same old predictable crowd pleasing show every time.

So what fucking happened? THEY FUCKING DIDN'T PLAY "LET'S CLUB IT TO DEATH"!!!!!

They did play the country version of Defecate, Martin Scorcese, 40 Years, Five Yards... why the fuck am I posting this, Fantl's the one with the set list!

As I commented in my previous post ["Lastly, fuck the man of mystery bullshit, both Ron and Les got their shirts off last night and they're fuckin' hunks! Not everything is a deeply hidden Freudian subconscious desire - sometimes the appeal is right under your nose... "], lotsa skin on display - can't complain about that. We even got to see a bit of Humph, gotta love that. I'd love to believe it was because I was there but there was wall to wall quality punani (well, there was when I went to the dunny - maybe it looked different from the stage), the woman standing behind me looked like a fucking model - what was she doing at a TISM gig???!

Dumped a bunch o' prints from the Punters gig on Humph before the show - I dunno where Brent got John Lydon from, I reckon he looks like Ralph Fiennes (am I in yet?). I didn't say anything, I already had that cold sweat thing that happens whenever I talk to someone I'm an admirer of and I don't think puking on my GPs would make a good impression on anyone. (Remind me to tell you about my conversation with Tim Hemensley sometime.)

Which of you pricks got backstage? Cos we certainly didn't. Probably all to the good, really.

Date: Fri, 27 Sep 2002 21:01:03 -0700 (PDT)
From:  "Mark"  
To: crap@suburbia.com.au
Subject: tism: Last night

Great gig. Humph waltzed right past me on his walk through the crowd during "Martin". Nearly got his mask ripped off next to me, but managed to evade the culprit.

I suffered though, holding onto my 12" vinyl for the entire 4+ hours I was there. Managed to pogo through most of it while making sure it didn't get bent as the dickheads kept pushing past to get onto the floor even though it was packed down there.

Also ... another annoyance ... those people who stand there like statues while the band is pumping out so much energy! Can't understand that one ...

Did anyone pick up some of the lyric changes? And what did Jock say as they went off after the encore?

Great to hear Morisson Hostel again ... I thought Ron'd change from bagging the Richmond cheer squad to the Carlton one ... easy target though I guess.

Can someone tell me the supports? Especially the guys on just before TISM?

Anyway ... classic show, had a great time, so did my wife.

Enjoy next week!

cheers, mark

From: "Brent Edwards"
To: crap@suburbia.com.au
Date: Mon, 30 Sep 2002 05:46:50 +1000
Subject: tism: Apology to Lindsay.

Well, this was very exciting for me. Got to meet HBF and rack his brain about various things which was fantastic and also spoke to Jock, Tokin & Eugene. What can I say, they all seem like great guys. Eugene mentioned that he feels that because he is up the back of the stage he is the forgotten member of the band, so I said that I would try to get the fans up the front to do the DE-LA DE-LA chant, which he thought was good. Also Jock couldn't believe it when I told him how much I and a few others enjoyed them playing "Let's club it to death", he said they decided to play it from the response on the website.

If I die tomorrow at least I will be content in the fact I got to meet Tism. Oh, and Eugene mentioned the band will keep on going for quite some time yet, being part time, they don't see each other enough to get sick of one another, which is heartening.


> -----Original Message-----
> From: TISM Self Storage [mailto:tismselfstorage@yahoo.com.au]
> Sent: Sunday, 29 September 2002 7:21
> To: crap@suburbia.com.au
> Subject: tism: Apology to Lindsay.
>  --- Brent Edwards  wrote: >
> >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: TISM Self Storage
> > [mailto:tismselfstorage@yahoo.com.au]
> >
> > > Which of you pricks got backstage? Cos we
> > certainly
> > > didn't. Probably all to the good, really.
> >
> > Um.........I did, Yeeeeeeeeessssssssssssssss!
> >
> > Brent
> Well????!!!

Date: Mon, 30 Sep 2002 11:39:11 +1000 (EST)
From:  "al gan"
To: crap@suburbia.com.au
Subject: tism: Apology to Lindsay.

Was able to go backstage on Friday night in Brisbane and Thursday night in Melbourne!!!

Brisbane was excellent cause there wasn't any family present and the band hung around for about an hour (I think Cheeses' uncle was there) so I got to talk heaps to all the band and drink their beer. Asked Ron to do a rendition of B Attitudes for Melbourne but he said he could not remember how all of it goes!  Too long ago. Humph also said the Dipper song was an early version of I'll 'Ave Ya. Fleur, Tim Herst and Mic were also there.

Melbourne was very busy backstage. Ron was nowhere to be seen, Humph left very early and Les was there for 5 minutes. The other 4 stayed for a while but it was too crowded to talk to them for a long period of time. Fleur and Eggy were also backstage.

Big Al

To: thecraplist@yahoogroups.com
From: "Azazel W"  
Date: Tue, 01 Oct 2002 12:07:55 +0000
Subject: [thecraplist] Why you shouldn't hit on chicks at Tism gigs...

Pt 1


We went to see TISM last night!  Lara, Marg and myself and we met up with some other SCA people.  It was at the Prince of Wales (I had never been there) and Klinger was the opening band.  Well we missed them and were in time to cram into the sweaty mosh pit and listen to the "fans" chant



So they filed onto the stage... in their usual black outfits with balaclavas and giant bent picture frames on their heads.  Apparently it's from one of their album covers.  They had one of their dancers parade a sign before each song letting the audience know what was next.  To the newbie TISM fan like myself - it was very helpful.  I only have 2 albums.

They were pretty good.  Visually entertaining and the songs were funny.  The crowd were wankers, the set a little sloppy and some of their songs don't translate well live.  You can tell the crowd favourites!  They threw "crap" into the audience and like rabid dogs they set to tearing it from each others hands!  Much bouncing (except from milk heavy mothers - Lara and myself) and the air was moist.

I am glad I went however, I'm not a sweaty crowd type.  Too many personal space issues.  I also dislike being bounced upon - hurts the toes!  One lassie waved her pony tail in my face. These are the times I miss being a smoker and having a lighter handy :-0

TISM didn't really play "that" long and they managed to hold my attention for most of the set - I have tendency to tune out and mind wander.

My major gripe however is not being able to see.  As stages are low to the ground, by the time the crowd jams in front of the band you see them from chest up.  For a tall person like me... that's okay.  For vertically challenged people like Marg it's not so good.  My gripe is the crowd surfers.  They block your view of the band with their drunken cartwheeling and moronic expressions.  However, there was one guy who flapped like a bird whilst being armed along and I did that was amusing.  So did he...

Perhaps I'm getting old.  I popped in my earplugs to save the few remaining upright ear hairs (permanent damage from the Ministry gig), planted my feet and held on.  Not even the two Archers Schnapps (new girly drinks) made me inclined to join the sweaty throng as they jumped all over one another in idiotic abandon.  I only felt tizzy (to use a Lara expression!)... the alcohol wore off fairly quickly.  I think it was forcibly sucked from my body by the intense body heat generated by the mass moist throng.  I did feel fairly sticky by the end.

Verdict on the new girly drinks:  Eeoowww.  Very sweet and in no way did I morph into any of those chickies who drink it in the ads!

I did have fun, I'm thrilled I went and my hearing seems to be intact.

Ness xx


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