Fuckin CASE STUDY

Well, Well, well. I have a point to be made. This point has to do with respecting the toaster. How easy is that you say? Well, again I'll tell you, you suffering bastard. Respecting the toaster is one thing many people forget to do on a daily basis. Yet we seem to brush our teeth and shower daily. What more could it take to give a few hours of respect to your toaster prior to lettin er rip with some tasty Eggos brand waffles, or fluffy white wonderbread? Seems so easy, yet its overlooked by nearly every household in this country known as 'Fat `n' Lazy America'.

From the looks of it, this thing was probably no Thomas' brand English muffin. (But how the hell would we know? Some inconsiderate bastard went haywire on this rolled wheat and grain, probably causing minor toaster damage in the process)

This came from some magazine. (MUST be one cool ass magazine). This article talked about toasting your house with a toaster and some sub-human of intelligence woman's experience in being the opposite of a cook. Not only did she ruin some perfectly good grub, torch her house and belongings, but she disrespected and nearly destroyed the sacred Fucking toaster. Now as we will see below, a toaster doesn't go down so quick. We like to hang around and show these rude mongols wtf is up. When you come home after igniting your house on fire trying to cook some frozen waffles they call them, the toaster still stands to say 'yeah I'm hurting, but I stuck around so I could say Fuck you'.

No, the commentary wasn't my neighbor. I RESPECT my favorite kitchen appliance.

Ok, so here goes, they give three rules for fire preperation/prevention.
I didn't like them so I'll let Burnout the Bear, 'only you can front me some nugs' go over them with you.

Don't move ANYWHERE near that bitch.


Don't put seeds in your bowl, they pop.


RESPECT YOUR TOASTER!

Check out THEM pupils!

That shit probably looked REALLY Similar to this. Some WACKOS did a real good job of showing the hazards of not respecting their toaster.
(PLEASE NOTE: This toaster got around a lot and that is why it was sacraficed. This was NOT an act of disrespecting a wholesome, well-behaved toaster.