kind of stuff that I would go home crying. I wanted to do so well, but somebody was always mentioning something about some- thing. It was really traumatic at that early period when I really aspired to be success ful at what I did and wanted my peers to accept me. That was a rough period. There seem to be all these different levels of esca lation along the road, but they always lead to the same place. Whenever you get to one level, you're still approaching a new level. The approach is exactly the same once again, even though you always thought, "Once I make it. . "I always said I had to make it by the timelwas 18.1 got to be 18 and I said, ''Well, I'll give it until I'm 21. So what if Tony Williams was a star at 19?" But pfloritiP~~ ~h~n~p vnii ~O ~lnn~

and the goals change. One of the hardest things for me was when I was knocking around in clubs. Then I got into the Hall & Oates thing, and then the Bette Midler thing. Finally when I got into Utopia, that was an achievement I had wanted to ac complish: being in a successful pop band that had wide recognition. I got there and I enjoyed it for a certain period of time. Then, all of a sudden, I got to that level and said, "Okay, here I am. I've made more money than I ever made, I've gotten some attention and I've started to develop as a writer, a player, a singer and a per former. Now what?" And now there's an other transition; it's like starting all over again. When I was younger, I thought, "If

~~titinued on page S6