In a dramatic turn of events, a surprise appearance by Superman and other superheroes at a Tournament of Doom council meeting convinced council members to open the 2005 TOD to god-like combatants.

These shocking events occurred at a meeting convened last week to confirm the roster for this year's field. Yoda, who had been petitioning the council to participate in the TOD alongside his Padawan learner Loren Havens, appeared in a last ditch effort to persuade the council to let him in.

Yoda once again expressed frustration with Loren's Jedi skills. To demonstrate his point, he asked Loren to open a can of Mountain Dew with the Force and pour it into a glass setting on a table. Loren closed his eyes in fierce concentration. Then, using only the Force, he popped the top of the can, levitated it into the air, then began pouring its contents unsteadily into the glass.

"That's pretty impressive," 2003 winner Mace Windu observed.

"But dribbling all over the table is he!" Yoda exclaimed. Loren was indeed spilling some of the contents onto the mahogany surface. Yoda, using the Force, then flung the can into Windu's forehead. He proceeded to fling other objects across the room. "Let me play you must!" Yoda yelled as he lost his temper.

As council members Zierath, Kerkove, Zick, and Stonerook dove for cover, 2002 TOD winner Darth Vader rose from his seat and ignited his lightsaber. "Calm down, you Jedi relic," Vader said. "Let me remind you of our new movie coming out this month. Knowing the way that thing ends, I don't think you'll be wanting to pick a fight with me."

A steely look crossed Yoda's eyes. "Come to this, it has. Mr. Kent, time it is!"

The roof of the council chamber was then torn off its walls and, in a swirl of wind and lightning, five figures descended from the sky. Those gathered in the room-UB students, staff, former competitors and all-watched in amazement.

Is Superman Super Smug?

Yoda announced those who entered. "To the Council, I present Superman! Wonder Woman! Thor! The Incredible Hulk! And Phyllis Gray!"

The five superheroes, standing together in a magnificent pose, then approached Vader. Superman stepped forward to speak for the group.

"First," Superman began, "I would just like to say I have no idea who this 'Mr. Kent' guy is. But second: Vader, it's time you let us duke it out with each other."

"This Tournament isn't for you, boy scout!" Vader proclaimed. Vader then extended his hand to execute a choke hold on Superman using the Force.

Superman and the other four superheroes watched and laughed. "Measly Sith Lord," scoffed Phyllis Gray.

Superman held up his pinky finger. "Oh, it's twitching," he said as he wiggled his finger. He then grabbed Vader's lightsaber by its shining red blade and snapped the blade in half across his knee.

The audible sound of Vader's jaw dropping inside his helmet echoed through the room.

"Uhm, you're in," said 2004 TOD winner Storm. A look of satisfaction crossed Yoda's face. Storm continued, "But you all have such an advantage."

"Oh, don't worry. We've got some friends," Wonder Woman said. "They're coming, and they're ready for a fight."

Are you?

THIS SUMMER: TOURNAMENT OF DOOM IV-BATTLE OF THE GODS! SMITE OR BE SMITTEN! (Or something like that…)

Former Tournament of Doom competitor and Hall of Fame member the Raptor has disappeared, prompting many to wonder what the wily prehistoric reptile has up his sleeves.

"The Raptor and I usually have breakfast everyday down at the Family Table," said TOD councilmember Jason Stonerook. "I order the pancakes, ham, and eggs, he brings in a sheep from the farm outside town. We talk about the weather, schoolwork, mayhem, whatever. But he hasn't been around for a week."

The last official sighting of the Raptor occurred at the monumental council meeting at which Superman and his friends persuaded the council to let nearly invincible characters participate in the TOD.

"I was standing by the side exit," said Dustin Ross. "Right after Storm allowed Superman and everyone into the Tournament, the Raptor started bouncing up and down. He then turned and headed to leave the council chambers."

Ross said the Raptor didn't look scared. "He was really determined, like he had to get to work, talking to himself. I asked him where he was going. The Raptor just hissed at me and kept walking out the door."

The raptor's whereabouts are unknown, although some people have reported a sighting.

"I was out at the quarry the other day picking up some rocks for my garden," said Jean Daywitt. "I'm not sure, but I think I saw the Raptor there with some of his freakin' buddies. It looked like they were digging through a pile of rocks and sorting out the green ones from the brown ones. They had a truckload of green rocks. Funny thing about it was that the green rocks were glowing. I thought that was kind of suspicious."

The Raptor has been spotted in other places as well. "I was substituting for an industrial arts teacher at a high school the other day when I hear this clanging coming from the back of the shop," said Kirsten Overlie. "I figure it's some kids messing around with a car, so I check it out. I get back there and there's this weird fellow with talons hammering away at a piece of glowing green metal on an anvil."

"I thought that was kind of suspicious," said Overlie. "I yelled at him, 'Hey, do you need any help?'" But he just said, 'Raaaaaagh!' and chucked this book at me." Overlie held up a book titled Metallurgy For Beginners."I was pretty sure he was a student, but he was wearing goggles so I'm not positive. I gave him detention but he never stopped by to serve it."

The Raptor remains incognito. "I not sure what he's up to," said Stonerook, "but I'm sure it's something devious."

Have you seen this Raptor?