Salley Blarney

She had to stop him. It couldn't go on, it must not go on. But
how? If she told him no what would he think? She felt so violated.
So many questions running through her head. She had to decide now.

"I thought I heard my parents."

"Nah, I didn't hear anything."

"Wait! are you sure you didn't hear anything? I could have sworn
I heard someone coming downstairs." she was barely able to speak
these words, but they had saved her.

"Hmm, maybe I heard something."

"Why don't we go upstairs, and get something to eat?" Now she
was home free all he had to say was
"Ok, I am kinda hungry."

The walk upstairs was a quiet one. It was not an awkward
silence, but it was the silence of exhaustion.

A glass of milk and a small cookie each tantalized their mouths.
Everything seemed OK again, but it wasn't OK, at least not in the
head of Sally Blarney. Everything was such a mess inside that she
finally gave up.

After he left it was a nightmare. She just had an earthquake in
her head. Her world had been turned upside down. It was of her own
choice that he did those things, yet it wasn't at all. She had to do
something, anything. Sally felt so dirty, maybe a shower would help
her.

What had happened to her? She just wished she could melt into
the floor. She wanted to make it all disappear. Something had to
make it all go away. The hatred of herself, the guilt, the bitterness.
For days her mind was racked. Others thought she was fine. Sally
always was cheery at school. Her face was a ray of sunshine to all.
The only other person that knew her pain was her best friend. It was
irreversible. She had to do something. It was overwhelming her.
Sally's school work dropped tremendously, and for that she felt even
worse.

Depression covered her in a blanket of darkness. Thoughts that
she despised came into her head, but always they were pushed away.
Suicide was too absurd. She couldn't hurt people like that. It was
the easy way out. No one could know she had thought of that. Never
could it be thought of. Or maybe it could...
A week had passed. Still nothing had been dissipated. She was
going to break like a dry twig. Sally was seriously thinking she
wanted to die. Sometimes she thought to herself,
"Would a razor hurt? Will there be much blood? Would they find
her naked?"

She hated herself for thinking it, but to her it seemed the only
way out. Other hidden things were coming out of her memory and
making it worse. Always she thought, never did she act.
One day while he dad was at work ad her mother was shopping she
knew her chance had come. Making sure her mom had left and was
gone, she crept to the stairs. A phantom of Sally floated downstairs.
It was as if the medicine cabinet willed itself open. Her small
white hand shook slowly as the Motrin and Tylenol drifted off the
shelf and onto the counter. One by one the pills inside the bottles
disappeared as Sally ate them. That's when she passed out, she had
had her last glimpse of the world, and then everything went dark.
When her mom came home Sally was gone. Everything was gone
the pain, the anguish, the hurt, the bitterness, and the joy.

Go to the Tokyo GeoPage