Michael stood, sword raised at his front, eyes closed in deep
prayer. "Bless us, oh Virtues. Guide us today in our darkest of
hours." He whispered, then raised his blade on high to the night sky.
"HEAR ME, HEAVEN! TREMBLE BEFORE ME, ALL BEHIND THE GATES OF
HELL! On the Year of our Lord, Three Thousand and Five, I Michael
SkitZ shall rise to crush Our enemies and bring victory to the allied
Houses of SkitZ and Fiss! We will raise our blades and be victorious
by the Seven Virtues and the hallowed Heavens above! Amen!"
All was silent.
SkitZ cleared his throat and brought down his sword. "Try it
now."
"CREEE-REEE-REEE-REEEEEEVVVVVRRRRROOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!"
The old, rusted out blue Ford Tempo...also known as Potato...
shuddered into life as Michael grinned at his little cherub traveling
companion. "Told you it would work."
"Your faith is impressive, sir." Jehuel said, deadpanned.
Michael hopped into the car, pushing Jehuel off to the side and
into the passenger seat. The tiny angelic being now sported a baseball
cap (Toronto Blue-Jays) and clothes instead of glowing robes. "Look on
the bright side." He said to the cherub. "The enemy will be expecting
us to be arriving in a tank...not Potato." He explained as they
gathered speed and zoomed up onto the highway from where the car had
previously stalled and rolled off to the side.
"I understand, sir, but we've already lost a day due to repairs."
Jehuel said, looking at a booklet map at his side. He carefully
unravelled the strange folding paper and found the road they were on.
"We are not on any timeline." Michael said firmly. "What has
happened has happened. I see no need to hurry."
"What about lord Fiss?"
"He will find himself. Seems to have a knack for that kind of
shit. If we look for him we'll only complicate things." SkitZ said
angrily. "I have complete faith in him."
"Yes, sir." Jehuel said, believing the archangel despite personal
doubt. "I know you do, sir."
"Good. Now, tell me, where are we off to next?"
"A place called..." Jehuel scrunched up his eyes. "I-One-
Eighty...oh, wait. I mean Je-fear-ason? Jafear's son?" he spun the
map upside down and realization dawned on his face. "Ahh, Jefferson
City!" he blinked. "I thought we were going to New-York?"
"We are." Michael said simply. "We're just taking the sneaky
route."
"Sneaky route?"
"Yes. Sneaky. I would have said we should go to Texas first,
but that fat asshole down there spooks me out. Hooze says they have
some magic, so I figured we should go right down the middle of the
States."
"Why didn't we just fly?" Jehuel asked finally after they were
passed by a semi-truck.
Michael sighed and slowed down. "Jehuel, one thing you have to
remember about humans...be they just the regular run-of-the-mill kind,
Senshi, faux Angels, or even Liberals..." he grinned. "They all love
to pretend to know what's going on around them."
Jehuel sighed. "I'm sorry, lord SkitZ. Your logic eludes me."
"If we sneak up on someone, we will see different things than if
they think we failed to sneak up on them. New York is run by a man who
likes to have everything under control and the whole world known to
him. If we just show up and start smacking him around he's going to
freak out. We don't want him to freak out. Not yet, anyway."
"So...we're driving because...?"
"We get to go on a road trip and see what we're up against as
well." Michael said firmly. "We've been talking about waging war and
we don't even know what we're fighting against."
A flash of understanding crossed the cherub's face. "Oh! OH!
You mean like how you and Uriel infiltrated the Hive of Unspeakable
Doom that one time!"
Michael nodded, then frowned. "Yes, but with a lot less frogs."
They watched the road go by for a few miles.
"Frogs, sir?"
"Yes. Now let us never speak of that mission ever again."
Michael said quickly, adjusting his collar.
"Yes, sir."
"I SWEAR IT WAS JUST BECAUSE OF THE SOAP!" Michael yelled,
gripping the wheel tightly and startling the little angel. "I didn't
mean to!"
Jehuel pledged never to mention anything frog-related to his lord
ever again. "Yes, sir."
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