The Early Moon Chronicles
by Michaela Wills
E-mail: Shelli982@aol.com
Story 7 - 'Night of the Firefly'
or 'A Younger Sailor Saturn'
She gazed around at the cruel faces, the bitterness, the distaste in
shock and horror. Did they really hate her so? She didn't remember the
evils they spoke of, she didn't do them. Maybe some other part of her
controlled her, forced her to be evil to them, but that was a different
Tomoe Hotaru than the one standing there now. Couldn't they see it
wasn't her, that this girl was different than the one yesterday?
Couldn't they see how much they hurt her, saying those mean things to
her? To someone who honestly hadn't done anything?
They could. Which is why they did so.
Time held still, the hatred in their eyes burning through her, engraved
in her mind forever. She could never forget the things they said and
did to her, it didn't seem right. The boy's injury was mortal, if they
let her touch him, maybe she could heal it. But her injury was deeper
in her soul. Her innocence and love stripped away painfully, they were
destroying her, the good side of Tomoe Hotaru. They attacked the wrong
her. Tears having long welled in her eyes, Hotaru did the only thing
she could.
She ran.
The unshed tears blocked her vision as she ran, trying desperately to
ignore the jeers and taunts being thrown at her retreating form. She
brushed her eyes harshly, making things clearer as she ran. She didn't
care where, she just needed to get away. To find solace from these
people who hurt her.
She ran farther and longer than she'd thought possible, never stopping
as she gasped for breath. It didn't matter, no one would care if she
pushed herself beyond her limits. No one cared enough to stop her. So
she pushed her limits, whether unconsciously or not. She strained those
barriers with all her might, the physical ones that would free her of
this life.
She finally collapsed to the ground in exhaustion, crying heavily in
great breathy sobs that hindered her lungs as much as her running had.
Was death worth it? Death was something she didn't fear, but why die if
there was a reason to live? Did she have something that would keep her
here?
Friends?
She had none.
Family?
Her mother was gone already and her father? The professor loved her,
she knew it was true, he was her father, after all, but . . . but he
was never there. Always busy, never listening to her or her needs. He
was there for her rarely, but not enough. He hadn't been there when she
really needed him, like with those mean children. The ones who'd torn
apart her soul for something she honestly was unaware of. Whatever had
happened, it was caused by another Hotaru, not the one they'd hurt! Had
her father been there then? No. He was never there, not anymore, there
was a time that he was, but all he cared for now was his experiments.
Not her and he was her only family.
A future?
Probably not. She'd be shunned and outcasted for being her forever. It
was not something she could help. If she, Tomoe Hotaru, had really hurt
that boy, how could anyone give her a chance to be anyone else? They'd
shown her that. She'd not have a chance for redemption in their eyes.
So what did she have?
Hotaru pondered this, what did she have? There had to be something left
for her, she was really too young to have nothing. She had to have
something, but what? Did she examine her family wrong or her future,
did she have one of those left?
She saw a blink of yellow light. Focusing on what was around her, the
small girl found herself in a vast park in the early evening darkness.
Her sobbing began to taper off as she stared at the place where the
blink came from and the tiny light winked at her again. A firefly.
It was alone, like her, there were no others around at all. A tiny
speck in the vastness of that park. She was breathing deeply, still
recuperating from her running. She clutched the grass in her hands as
an anchor for her breathlessness. She wanted to watch the firefly, but
couldn't. She had to close her eyes and catch her breath.
In and out, in and out. One shaky, slow breath after another. Slowly,
Hotaru loosened her death grip on the blades of crisp grass, wrapping
her arms around her shoulders as she regained her breath. She looked up
from her labors to see the park again. The little firefly winking at
her in the darkness still. Her violet eyes widened in surprise. She'd
expected to be alone again once catching her breath, the little
lightning bug to have fluttered away, unaware of her plight. Yet it
hung in the air around her. A tiny beacon of light in the bleakness of
the moonless, starless, cloudy night.
Hotaru tilted her head to the side a little, catching the bug in her
cupped hand, holding it carefully so not to hurt it. It glowed at her
as it rested in her hands, making her pale skin glitter warm hues for a
moment in time.
"Are you alone? Where are all the other little fireflies?" she asked
the creature in a hushed whisper. It blinked in response, causing her
to release a tiny hint of laughter. She quickly grew somber again.
"I'm alone too." The firefly blinked again. She smiled a genuine smile
at the little lightning bug. They stayed that way, the girl and the
bug, until she noticed the wind pulling at her hair, cooling her from
her exhaustion.
She closed her violet eyes again, tipping her chin up and taking in the
sensation of the breeze. The firefly seemed to notice too, taking leave
from her hand and playing in the passing wind. She watched the blinking
light in near fascination as it twirled through the air, circling her
head. Smiling, Hotaru reached for it, but it flew away from her grasp.
Hotaru cocked her head to the side again, standing up and following the
tiny burst of light as it flew. It weaved through the trees, beckoning
Hotaru to follow it at it flew. Curiosity ebbed through her. Did the
little bug understand her loneliness? Shrugging in submission, Hotaru
following the firefly through the twisted paths of the park without
further resignation.
The firefly finally alighted a low hedge, pausing for just a moment
before flying over it in a burst of light. Hotaru studied the barricade
before her. it wasn't quite a hedge, more like a series of very close
chest-high bushes that continued in both directions. Carefully Hotaru
pushed through one of the larger separations, gaining a number a
scratches in the process. Pausing for a moment on the other side of the
hedge line, she knelt down and healed a few of the larger scratches.
She stood up to see one of the most beautiful sights of nature.
She stood in a small clearing, surrounded on all sides by brush and
trees, moonlight streaming through a hole in the cloud cover made by
the passing breezes. Yet the most spectacular thing was the hundreds of
thousands of fireflies that danced around the clearing, her own little
one blending with the others. They sparkled in the suddenly appearing
moonlight like diamonds, floating through the branches of the trees and
mingling in the breeze. She turned in a circle, dancing pulses of light
surrounding her, enveloping her in the sight.
A small sound of awe and appreciation escaped her as she sank to the
grass, watching the waltzing fireflies. Her own little one lost in the
multitudes. Cupping her hands around a nearby one, she got the strange
sensation that it was the same little bug that had lead her to the
clearing.
"I see," she whispered, "I only thought that you were alone, but you
really have alot of little friends here. All you had to do was go and
find them."
She thought about her words. 'All you had to do was go and find them.'
Would that be true for her too? Were there people out there who would
care for her as her father, but take the time to share it with her? Was
there really a chance for her? Was there really hope for the small,
dark haired, physically weak Tomoe Hotaru?
Looking at the firefly as it left her hand, she smiled. Yes, there were
people out there. All she had to do was believe and hope. She did have
a future, one always have a future, they just had to find it! She just
had to find the people who would allow her to have a good one. She
would wait, and she would look. She vowed silently, to never give up on
those people, whoever they might be, who would be there someday. She
would be there for them and help them, as they would someday help her.
Standing up and letting the firefly go, Hotaru brushed off her skirt to
leave. Making her way back to the space in the hedgerow she examined
the multitudes of light dashes around her. Turning her back to the
hedge for a moment, hands clasped before her chest, she smiled at the
natural beauty that she would never let herself forget. As she'd not
forget the promises she'd made there.
"Thank you, little firefly. Thank you so much." She smiled as she
spoke, seeing the hope in those tiny glimmers of yellow. Passing
through the bush and into the vastness of the park beyond She looked
up at the moon, once again being covered by the heavy blanket of
clouds. As if to tell her this was their secret. The moon, the
firefly's and Hotaru's. A smile, mixed in happiness and understanding
played across her lips as she began to skip home.
The smile on her mouth and hope in her heart again.
And her little firefly flew higher in the sky, passing by the clouds as
it looked for a leaf in the tree canopy to rest upon. Sitting on a
leaf, it watched the dark little figure passing through the darkness.
Transcending pain, loneliness and destruction.
"Sweet dreams little girl, never forget what I've shown you. You're not
alone." it whispered into the wind.
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