FINISHING


   Ye set up: In episode 19 of Utena ("the one with Prince Onion"),  
during 
the student council scene, Juri casually suggests that in order for the 
two 
of them to gain peace, Miki and Nanami should switch their loves. 
Needless 
to say, this prompts them to give her a very "sick" look. She smiles.

   This picks up a few episodes later.



   Switch our loves?

   She thinks that Miki and I should switch our loves? As in, between 
each 
other? That I should be pining after the Rose Bride, and he should be 
--

   Oh, what a disgusting thought. The woman must have suffered a brain 
injury during one of her pointless fights. There's no other way that 
she 
could have come up with such a disgusting, filthy, perverted, wrong 
thought.

   I mean, ick. Why would /any/ man every chase around after another 
man's 
ugly butt? Now, I suppose I could understand if Miki were mooning after 
oniisama's cute butt, but there's no way that oniisama would ever -- I 
mean, 
let's face it, girls are cuter. Ask anyone!

   I wish I'd just ignored it, like I ignore most of the crap that she 
comes 
up with at Council Meetings. Or that I could forget it. But no, just 
like a 
chronic illness, the words come back, days later, as I'm peacefully 
minding 
my own business and looking for ways to screw up the Rose Bride's next 
duet 
with Miki.

   Maybe it's being in the music room and thinking about him that does 
it to 
me. I just can't seem to focus on my strategy, between the words and 
the 
piano.

   What's she know, anyway? Crazy old witch. Probably wanted to have 
the 
Rose Bride /and/ Tenjou as part of her harem. Ick. More disgusting 
thoughts. 
And I thought bugs were bad.

   So I somehow find myself sitting at the piano. And his song is still 
there on the music stand.

   Of course I can play the piano. I am a woman of grace and 
refinement, who 
appreciates music. I may not have Miki's genius, but I can follow the 
notes 
well enough.

   I have had lessons.

   I had a lesson.

   I had most of a lesson but the stupid teacher started to look too 
intently at oniisama, and if I knew one thing at eight, it was that 
some 
people just would not do.

   But I can play. It doesn't sound good -- as good as Miki would 
sound, but 
maybe if I tune it so that it does sound good when I play, it will 
sound 
really bad when the Rose Bride starts playing. But how would I keep 
Miki 
from noticing when he went to tune up.

   Maybe I could get Tsuwabuki to --

   Maybe not.

   The door to the music room slides open. I could stop playing but 
Miki 
never does so I don't etiher. I shift one eye to catch a glimpse of the 
person's reflection in the window. Bluish hair, boy's uniform -- yep, 
Mickey-chan.

   I suppose that I should be grateful that he's not freaking out about 
me 
touching his piano, like he did that one time when I took his --

   K-LICK.

   -- and what is up with that thing anyway?

   Well, at least he's keeping /fairly/ quiet. Pressing keys like this 
is 
hard enough without listening to him blather about his petty little 
problems 
or ...

   He's touching me.

   Only on my shoulder -- /shoulders/ now, but he's touching me. I 
ought to 
stand up, turn around and tear him a new hole, but he's touching my 
shoulders and that means I can't stand up. Nobody touches me but 
oniisama, 
and he certainly hasn't touched me on my upper arms the way that Miki 
is 
doing now, or moved down just barely skirting past my bosom to brush 
against 
my elbows and this is improper and I'm going to tell oniisama and he'll 
kill 
Miki.

   I say "No," but for some reason it doesn't come out like an order 
should, 
it sounds like I'm wimpering and I never ever wimper, not even when a 
boy's 
hand is resting on my stomach and the other one is moving downwards.

   And if I didn't already think that these skirts were waay too short 
the 
fact that a moment later his hand is under would convince me and I 
resolve 
to insist to oniisama that he see about lengthening them.

   And then forgive me oniisama.

   It feels good. That feels good. The hand on my stomach just beneath 
my 
breasts feels good. The breath on the back of my neck feels good. It's 
wrong. I am oniisama's. Only oniisama. Should make me feel. This way.

   So that's why. I reach back. Towards his waist. To push him back. 
Really. 
And if he won't push. Then I'll twist. Really. I won't caress. Only 
oniisama.

   Only ...

   No.

   Before I can even wonder why my hand finds what it finds behind me, 
I'm 
being spun around.

   No.

   And before I can wonder at the lazy amusement on his face, I'm being 
kissed, and his tongue is in my mouth only it's

   No.

   not

   No.

   him.

   But it still feels good.

   But I remember who I am in time and I push Kozue off of me, gasping 
for 
breath to feed my fury. "Bitch," I say hoarsely. "What ... why ..."

   "To get the complete set," she says, arching an eyebrow at me. "Do 
you 
like my uniform?" she asks, caressing the lying pant legs. "I only wear 
it 
for special occasions. When they think they want a boy."

   "Kill you," I tell her. "Rip your fucking heart out, dyke bitch 
slut." 
Complete set? I think with the tiny bit of my mind that can still 
think. 
What does she mean? She can't have slept with everyone else in seventh 
grade. I'd know. What does she mean?

   "Dyke?" she asks. "Funny, I could have sworn that's why you wore 
those 
stupid looking shorts, so that you'd look like that pink-haired butch 
who's 
hanging around with Mickey-chan lately."

   My uniform? My warrior's uniform of which I am so proud? But I 
didn't ... 
I only wore that so he'd ... because ...

   Complete set.

   When they want a boy.

   No.

   "After all," she twists the knife, "if he's going to collect, why 
shouldn't I?"

   No.

   No, he wouldn't. He couldn't. He didn't. She's lying, she's saying 
things 
to confuse and to hurt me, and I don't have to sit here with my legs 
spread 
like some whore and listen to them, so I leave and if I'm running it's 
because I want to run.

   Complete set.

   Me and oniisama.

   Complete set.

   Miki and her.

   Complete set.

   Damn you to hell, Arisugawa Juri, I didn't need to know this.

   I don't ... I'm not ... I can't ...

   Oh god, what will I do?



   And at that moment, a man named Mikage graduated.

   Many things did not happen because of this. No one descended into 
the 
darkest part of their souls to take up a rose and bring death to a 
bride. 
But many other things that had happened because of Mikage's final 
examination were important, and so they still happened ... just 
differently. 
They worked it out to Their satisfaction.

   As one of Them considered these events, she decided that they didn't 
need 
to have happened, and erased them from the the memories of both pawns.

   She did not do this because she was merciful.

   She did this because she was cruel beyond imagination.



   Mou. What a little slut Miki's sister is. It's a shame he has to put 
up 
with her. I bet he wishes he had a good little sister he could be proud 
of. 
Like me.

   But I'm oniisama's.

   To the end of world.



Author's Notes.

   I lied. I do that sometimes.

   Finishing, unless my knowledge of sword-smithing fails me, is that 
final
step in the process before polishing.

   "Shoujo Kakumei Utena" was created by Be-Papas and brought to North 
America by Central Park Media. This story, while containing characters 
held 
under copyright by others, is copyright 2000 by Chris Davies.

   Nobody Sue Me Okay?