It was painful watching Duo talk to Hilde. They were smiling and sharing private jokes Heero could not hear from where he stood, hiding in the doorway. The original intent was to ask Duo about something that he had deemed necessary a few minutes before. It was Hilde, however, that had made him forget. His face became dark, murderous as he watched her talk to Duo, noticing every time she batted her eyelashes, every time she made Duo laugh.

Duo drank from the can of soda that *she* had brought to him and gave her a smile of thanks. Wasting no time, she took her turn with the can and drank some of caramel liquid as well.

Heero’s eyes grew murderous. What was that, Hilde, a secondhand kiss? Adrenaline was being pumped into his body. His face became flushed with rage. A small part of his mind warned that perhaps he was reading too much into her actions, but he was too angry to care. She was daring Heero to act, wasn’t she? Didn’t she understand that Duo was spoken for?

As Hilde drank from the can, her eyes spotted Heero by the door, watching them with poorly concealed fury in his eyes. She smirked against the icy metal can, unconvinced by his deepening scowl, or by his white knuckles as his hands gripped the doorframe. She has been there with them long enough to know just how Heero treated Duo. She had convinced herself that Heero held Duo in contempt and wanted to hurt him, despite Duo’s claims to the contrary. Why should she back down? Duo was not, technically, spoken for, and she was more than willing to give him what Heero could never give.

Duo continued with his sad retelling of Trowa’s earlier bout with the flu, never noticing Hilde’s brief glance towards the door. As he rushed through the punch line, Hilde smiled and lowered the can from her lips. “He really did that?” she asked, never missing a beat.

“Yeah!” Duo assured. “He spazzed out and started crying. Never knew he was so high-strung when he’s sick. He even yelled at Catherine, and I quote, “Damnit Cathy! I don't want anymore of your soup!”

Duo and Hilde laughed, neither noticing as Heero stormed away.

Duo knocked harder. “Come on, Heero. Open up.” He sighed. “Heero…”

“Forget it Maxwell,” Wufei said from his corner on the floor as he dealt himself another hand of Solitaire. “He’s not coming out.”

“What, not even for his Best Fucking Friend in the Whole Fucking World!” Duo screamed at the door, trying to get a rise out of the young man inside. “It’s not like I’m going to bite you or anything.” He pressed his forehead and the palm of his right hand against the wooden door.

Quatre sighed into his cup of Earl Grey from his seat at the table. “Forget it, Duo. If he doesn’t want to come out today, he’ll come out tomorrow.” He took a sip of his tea and let out a breath of appreciation for the miracle of spiked liquids.

“Yeah right,” Duo moaned as he stepped away from the door and plopped himself into a chair opposite Quatre. “He’s been there since this morning, right? He’s not coming out…”

“He does need to pee sooner or later,” Relena said, the majority of her attention focused on Wufei’s card game as she leaned in and studied the cards on the floor. She tapped one with her finger, causing Wufei to scowl. “He’ll come out.”

With the scowl still firm on his face, Wufei used the card Relena tapped.

“What if he decided to pee out the window instead of leaving the room?” Duo mused as he stared at the cup of tea Quatre offered before drinking it all down. Ooh, that was warm… in a weird way. It was making his cheeks blush.

“That is true,” Trowa commented as he flipped through a CD carrying case by an average-sized sound system. By him was a glass full of some clear liquid.

“Why do you care about him anyway, Duo?” Hilde asked as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pressed her cheek against the side of his neck. “He cares nothing about you. He’s not even willing to open the door to you.”

Duo took Quatre’s teapot and poured himself another cup.

“Don’t worry about him. He’ll be fine,” she said against his left ear.

Heero stretched his arms and plopped them on either side of his body as his mind slowed down to the speed of molasses.

Duo gave up. Good.

No, wait. That was bad. Why would Duo give up?

Does he really care about him?

Duo said that he was his friend.

He can hear everything the others were saying about him on the other side of the doors, especially what Hilde was insinuating. He did care about Duo. He cared about him so deeply, it’s painful, but…

Maybe he’ll unlocked the door and ask Duo what Hilde meant to him… what he meant to Duo… He needed to know how did Duo feel about him, about them. Maybe he’ll ask him tomorrow. Or next week… next year…

It took a while for him to notice the loud music coming from the other side of the door. It was bass-driven, and there were wild whoops and cries above the beat.

He turned onto his side, fully intent on ignoring the revelry just a few feet away. They were always the same, these after-hours parties. Trowa would provide the music, Quatre the liquor, and sooner than later, Duo, buzzed, would drag him into some dark distant corner so that they could make out.

Last time, it was in this very room…

“Aw yeah, baby, shake that ass!”

On his bed… But the alcohol leaves Duo’s system too quickly to allow anything but groping… And then, when even the haze disappears, everything's the same as before, where he's only Heero’s fucking friend and nothing more…

“Aya, Duo! Don’t touch me there!”

Duo…

Heero rolled onto his back again, the darkness perfectly concealing the confused expression on his face. Something was happening outside his room. Something involving music and alcohol… Oh god, he could only imagine, since this won't be the first or the last time those two would mix.

“You like it like that, baby?”

Yes, now he was curious. From the moment those slurred words left Relena’s mouth, he needed to see what was going on. He sat up on his bed and placed his bare feet on the carpeted floor. The voices outside continued in their drunken singsong as Heero stood up and slowly made his way to the door.

“Relena, get down from off the table!”

“Come here and get me down!”

“At least… Relena, put your shirt back on!”

Heero turned his doorknob slowly, hoping against hope that everyone was too busy to notice him sneaking a peek. They’re all probably too drunk to notice him.

“God, I LOVE your BOOBS!”

Or too distracted.

Heero opened the door with the speed of a snail, curiosity taking over his better judgment (and his resolve). Bit by bit, the opening between the door and the frame grew, allowing the light outside to seep in.

It was only for a split second, but Heero was sure that he has never seen Relena Dorlain so off her rocker that she was doing a tabletop strip show for an audience of mostly gay men… who was very much cheering her on for reasons only God knew about. Quatre, tipsy from the tequila he tended to put in his tea, was on the table as well, trying to figure which of Relena's breasts were heavier by weighing them in his hands. Wufei was desperately trying to get the woman down, at least, as he waved her blouse above his head and yelled at her to get decent.

Off to a corner, by the stereo equipment was Trowa, as visually smashed as the rest of them, pretending an empty beer bottle was a guitar. His fingers ‘strummed’ his glass instrument as he mumbled about how his love has left him for some drunken amateur stripper. Lying down next to him was Hilde, already asleep from the alcohol and her clothes still on her.

In a span of a second he saw all of this, but once that second was over, something dark and manic rushed him and pushed him back into the dark room. Heero fell onto the bed, his arms spread out behind him in an attempt to catch himself from falling completely as his attacker locked the bedroom door.

“So, thought you could escape, huh, Heero?” Duo giggled, his voice laced with a generous amount of Quatre’s alcohol, as he made his way to Heero’s side. “Didn’t think I will get inside?” He lay down on the bed; half of his body pressed against Heero’s while the rest lay on Heero’s soft comforter.

Heero looked at the ceiling, blushing as Duo’s warm breath moved from the base of his neck to the strip of skin between the back of his ear and his hair line. “I knew you’d come sooner or later,” he admitted. Duo’s tongue flicked out and licked the underside of Heero’s ear. “But, Duo?”

“M?” he mumbled as he nibbled and kissed Heero’s skin. His hand slipped underneath Heero’s shirt and moved lazily up his abdomen to his pecks.

“What do you think about us?” he whispered, partially to himself, even as his arms wrapped around Duo and pulled his body closer. A hand wandered up Duo’s spine and rested on the base of his neck even as the fingers slipped into Duo’s hair.

Duo took the invitation and kissed Heero lips with a generous amount of enthusiasm. His tongue played lightly against Heero’s as his hands made their way down to Heero’s thighs. He lifted his head up a centimeter, a sliver of space separating Heero’s lips from his own. “I’m your friend, remember? Your best fucking friend…” He lowered his face, his lips, crossing that sliver of distance to claim another kiss, but Heero’s fingers on his lips stopped him.

“I love you, Duo.”

Duo’s eyes widened, their bright irises glowing in the dark room, until the eyelids closed and a dense silence floated in. His hands stopped wandering, and, after a while, Duo’s body shifted, rolled off Heero and lay down on the bed beside him. He sighed as his back rested against the soft comforter, his arm brushing against Heero’s arm.

“Well, there goes my buzz,” he said to himself. Truth was, he had never expected something like that from Heero. Not those words.

Heero slowly rose from his bed and sat up. His eyes were low, his head low, so much so that even in the darkness Duo could see a distinct wetness develop in Heero’s eyes. “I’m sorry.” He stood, unaware of the soft rug underneath his bare feet, just on the pulsing ball of humiliation that has taken root inside his stomach, on the effort it took to not let the forming tears fall.

“Heero…” Duo’s hand reached out and gently took hold of Heero’s elbow.

Heero was too tired to shake the hand away.

Duo stood and made his way behind Heero’s body. His arms wrapped around Heero, pressing their bodies closer. The warmth underneath Heero’s clothes felt more and more like home. He placed a chaste kiss on Heero’s cheek and held him close.

~end

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