Gundam Wing fanfiction. My standard disclaimers apply. I once read in Madam Hydra’s site that she would leave it up to someone else to write about a totally wicked Quatre. I hope this fic proves to be the answer to her challenge. This was inspired by an unfinished poem that someone wrote in my notebook. It goes:

What happens when an angel dies?

Would heaven weep at the loss of one of its messengers of love and hope?

Would the other angels mourn the passing or will they go on as always?

Would the soul of an angel go to heaven or to hell or be forever trapped in between?....

It made me remember Madam Hydra’s challenge and a thought came to me during one of my classes and the rest came to me during a Biology exam. Shonnen ai / yaoi warning. E-mail me for comments at bukiminatenshi@mailcity.com. I’m a sucky yaoi writer so don’t expect anything overly glorified, but on top of that, I had fun writing this one. Another warning: There are parts which are quite repulsive.

Angels and Demons

by Lady Aria

Quatre gasped for breath as he ran -- although from what, he did not know. Feelings of fear and anguish ran though him like lightning and thunder urging him to flee farther and farther. Twigs and bushes scratched his bare feet and grabbed at the loose, white shirt that was the only thing that clothed him. He came to a stop beneath a blooming sakura tree and he slowly slid down its trunk as weariness engulfed him. A small sob escaped his lips as he felt tears make their way down his cheeks. The wind picked up and sent chills running through his body, the shirt providing little warmth.

Quatre asked himself as he wrapped his arms around himself desperately trying to subdue his shuddering.

The wind had disturbed the tree so much that the petals started to rain down upon him. Quatre lifted his face to watch the rain of blossoms. They have always managed to soothe him whenever his mind was troubled and he looked up to them now to help him make sense of the turmoil that was within him.

The expression of peace on his face turned into horror as he watched the delicate pink petals turn red -- the red of blood. In the next instant, the slowly drifting petals turned into a rain of blood, soaking his hair and staining his white shirt. The smell of it was upon him and he looked at his blood-stained hands with a mixture of horror and fascination. A single name came to his mind.

"Trowa...," he whispered as he brought his hands up to his face. He remembered... what had made him run... the sight that he wanted to deny.... Quatre dropped his face into his hands and let out a wail of pure anguish as he curled his body into a shuddering ball.

The sight of Trowa lying dead on the floor, his life blood slowly seeping out of the neat slash on his throat.... The last accusing look that he had given him before he died....

Trowa... he had killed his own lover.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"NOOOO!!!!"

Quatre sat bolt upright in the bed, whipping the covers off him in the process. Cold sweat beaded up all over his body as he struggled to gain control over his ragged breathing. He immediately brought up his hands and looked them over. After making sure that there was no blood on them, he wrapped them around his body. The air conditioning in the room had been turned off to let in the warm sea breeze and he let his gaze wander towards the partially open balcony doors. The sight of a waning moon with its light reflected off the rolling ocean waves was the only thing to be seen. He tensed as he felt a pair of arms snake around him and pulled him close.

"Is something wrong?" Trowa asked him as he nuzzled Quatre’s neck, luxuriating at the salty sweet taste of the boy’s skin. "You look like you’ve just seen a ghost."

Quatre closed his eyes and let Trowa continue with his ministrations. The image that remained in his mind was all too vivid. He turned to face Trowa and captured his mouth with his in a kiss that spoke both of urgency and desperation.

Trowa eased the other boy back onto the bed as he marveled at the intensity of Quatre’s kiss. He broke the contact and looked deep into the dizzying sapphire depths of Quatre’s eyes. He could see the fear in those eyes -- the same twin orbs that had captured him the very first time they met. It made him angry to see him afraid.

The blonde boy saw the look on Trowa’s face and ran the back of his hand down his cheek in an effort to soothe him. "It was just a nightmare, Trowa," Quatre whispered and his breath caught as he felt the taller boy’s weight settle atop him. All of his senses reached new heights whenever he felt Trowa this close... it was just overwhelming. "Just a nightmare...," he breathed as Trowa placed a finger on his lips to silence him.

"You don’t have to worry about anything, angel," he replied, looking intently into his eyes. "I swear, for as long as I live, that no one will ever hurt you. I won’t let them."

Quatre took comfort in those words as Trowa lips started to make their tantalizingly slow way all over his body. He trusted Trowa and knew that his word was his bond. The last vestiges of the nightmare disappeared as he surrendered to Trowa’s gentle kisses. Images of when they’d first confessed their feelings for each other came to him as well as when they’d first made love in his desert hideaway. Flashes of light exploded in his mind as he came and he felt Trowa shudder above him as he filled him. Quatre felt Trowa encase him in the cocoon of his embrace as they settled down for sleep, the sound of his lover’s breathing becoming the sweetest lullaby that he’s ever heard....

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"You’re late."

Quatre and Trowa looked at each other sheepishly while Duo let out a muffled snicker. Heero had called this meeting so that they could go over their latest mission. They were once again assigned to work as a team and Heero wanted to make sure that they get the job done right. He shot Duo a glare which made the long-haired pilot swallow the teasing remark he was about to unleash on the pair and waited for the other two to settle down.

"Our mission," Heero said, laying out a map of a local OZ research facility and mobile suit depot, "will take place here. One will be in charge of planting the explosives in the hangars." Heero pointed to several large buildings lining the southern perimeter of the facility. He then pointed at the large central building. "Two of us will be in charge of infiltrating the main research building. Their mission would be to steal the data and blow up the facility. The other two would provide back-up when the explosives start going off."

Duo smiled as he got to his feet. "I get to plant the explosives in the hangars. It’s been some time since I last blew up something like this! Let’s see how brave those OZ bastards are when they no longer have any mobile suits left to hide in."

"Trowa and I will infiltrate the facility... if it’s okay with you," Quatre said, looking at his lover. He smiled when he saw the slight nod he gave him.

"Ryoukai," Heero said as he rolled the map up and dumped it into a steel trash can at the corner of the shack. "Wufei and I will be your back-up." He lit some paper and dumped it into the bin, too. he thought as the flames cast shadows upon five grim faces. He’d noticed that Trowa and Quatre had been trading looks even as he gave them the specs of the mission and he thought that it was a good thing that they were doing one of the tandems. He’d seen how good a team they were. he thought as he watched them talking. He shot another look at Duo and he smiled inwardly when he saw the boy freeze. He’d caught him sneaking looks at him -- again. He grabbed his uniform jacket off his chair as the last of the papers was consumed by the flames. "Mission time is 0200 hours," he said as he walked towards the door. "Don’t be late."

Duo watched in stunned silence as Heero walked away. He knew that the perfect soldier had caught him staring at him once again, but this time, Duo’d caught him staring back. Duo thought as he himself exited the shack,

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Duo gleefully pushed the button that activated the bomb. He’d synchronized them all to go off upon Deathscythe’s activation. If there was anything that Duo liked more than piloting his beloved Gundam, it was a show that went with it. He grabbed the bag that he’d brought with him into the base and latched himself to the underside of a truck heading out of the base.

The mission had started a half-hour ago and things were going smoothly on his side of things. Funny thing was, he’d been having a bad feeling about the mission the moment he’d arrived at the base but he’d just dismissed it as a pre-mission jitters. He’d left Quatre and Trowa at the entrance of the base and proceeded with his own mission. They’d agreed to meet at exactly 0235. That was when they’d start taking out as many of the OZ as they could before falling back.

Images of high-level destruction danced in his mind as he entered Deathscythe’s cockpit. It was two minutes to the rendezvous time. He was tracing the activation code of Deathscythe with his hand. One minutes to rendezvous and the alarm was sounded. Duo’s eyes widened in shock and he said a muffled curse as he activated Deathscythe. Explosives started rocking the base the moment the Gundam’s eyes lit in their eerie green. Thermal scythe in hand, he rushed into the base. Heero and Wufei were already in deep into the fighting and it was at that moment that Duo knew his fears had been well founded.

There was no sign of Sandrock nor Heavyarms.

"Duo! Extraction... Now!" Heero shouted over the roar of gunfire.

"B-but Quatre and Trowa could still be inside...." Duo stammered. There was no way he was leaving without the other two pilots.

"Nani?!"

"They never made it out," Duo whispered angrily as he cut a Leo into four pieces with his scythe.

"Khe wu [1]! They managed to salvage about thirty mobile suits!" Wufei cut into their conversation. "There’s no way the three of us will be able to hold them off for long! We have to get out of here!"

"Duo," Heero said calmly, "we have to leave."

"I’m not leaving without them," he replied stubbornly as a blast hit him.

"We don’t have a choice, baka!" Heero shouted in anger. "It’s either we get out now, or we die where we stand."

Duo was about to argue the point when he saw Wufei start to fall back. He knew that Heero was right. His monitors supported the perfect soldier’s words when they indicated that the base’s missile launchers were starting to turn in their direction. Duo thought as a lone tear streaked its way down his cheek, He pulled back the lever that made Deathscythe take to the air as Heero let out a final blast from his laser cannon.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"What the...?"

The shock of cold water hitting his face was enough to pull Quatre out of unconsciousness. What he saw was not very promising. Both he and Trowa were tied to chairs and a gaggle of OZ soldiers and obviously-high-ranking personnel were milling around them. He saw Trowa’s visible eye squinting in pain as they looked at each other. From the bruises that were starting to form on his cheekbone, it was obvious that the soldiers had been busy while he was still out of it. Quatre felt a the hot rush of blood coming to his face in anger. How dare they....

"My, aren’t you a pretty one?"

Quatre felt a hand under his chin, forcing him to look up. The speaker was a beautiful woman with shoulder-length auburn hair and blue eyes. He could imagine men falling all over her except for one thing. A sneer of total contempt marred her perfect face. She stepped away from him as an officer tapped her shoulder. He whispered something into her ear and Quatre saw her start with surprise.

"You mean to tell me that he’s one of the terrorists?!"

"Yes, Dr. Koudai," the officer replied. "We found them trying to escape and managed to knock them both unconscious before the blasts started. I’m sorry to say that although we did managed to catch the two of them, we weren’t able to save your laboratory." He gestured regrettably towards the ruined building that could be seen from one of the room’s windows. The look of surprise on the officer’s face was apparent when Dr. Koudai laughed.

"If you’re worried that Treize Khushrenada and the Romefeller Foundation are going to take the wasted research out of your sorry hides, you can stop holding your breaths," she said arrogantly. "That building is but the tip of the iceberg. We’d foreseen a sabotage attempt from the colonies and had built the real research facility underground." She turned to face Trowa and Quatre and smiled wickedly. "Twenty stories underground." Her smile widened when she saw the look of defeat cross the young blonde’s face and she immediately walked over and yanked his head up using his hair. "Don’t worry," she whispered into his ear. "I’ll give you a chance to see it. After your interrogation, that is."

At a snap of her fingers, Quatre and Trowa were hauled away by the other soldiers. She watched them for a few minutes before turning to the direction of another group of people wearing white lab coats. Her staff.

"Nami," she said, letting her eyes settle on a plain-looking woman with short, black hair and green eyes, "see to it that I get the blonde after they’re through with him." She turned her back to the others and started walking out the door. "He interests me."

"Wakari mashita," the woman responded as the clicking of her high-heeled shoes echoed in the hallway.

"Looks like we have our work cut out for us," a black-haired scientist replied as he nodded towards the ruined building. "It was a good thing Colonel Khushrenada decided to humor Dr. Koudai’s paranoia or all of us would have been dead by now."

"Don’t go off congratulating yourself just yet, Kai," Nami said as she pulled out her glasses from her coat pocket and put them on. "A number of our samples were stored there, as well as some of the files. It’s going to take a couple of months to rebuild even those."

"If I know Dr. Koudai, she’s sure to have a copy or two of everything stored somewhere," another woman replied as she made her way out the door. "We’ll be able to resume our work in no time at all. Anyway, I’ll see you all later after work, okay?"

The rest of the research staff filed out of the room until all that were left were the Kai and Nami. He looked quizzically at her and, seeing that she was in deep thought, snapped his fingers in front of his face. The look on her face made him smile.

"So serious," he said lightly as he leaned on the wall. "What’s going on in that head of yours?"

"I was just thinking...," she began as she walked to a window looking down at the two boys being led away. "Did you see how young those two were? They couldn’t be a day over fifteen and here they are, prisoners of OZ and charged with the high crime of terrorism." Nami sighed as she rested her head on the window frame. "It scares me when I think of the lengths those blasted colonists are willing to go to just to bring down OZ. I know that this is a war, but bringing in children...."

"Nami," Kai said as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "I say that this is just another one of the things that make us more determined at what we do. Every new discovery we make will help end this war. Come on," he said as he pulled her to him. "Better get that kid as soon as you can before those soldiers take their interrogation into newer levels."

They parted ways as soon as they were out of the building with Kai heading to the underground research facility and Nami continuing towards the main military building. She continued on past several doors and into an elevator that would take her into the subterranean levels. She stopped at level B-3 and slipped her ID card into the lock and pressed her palm on the panel. Once the lock confirmed her identity, she headed down the hallway to the interrogation rooms.

Level B-3 was one of the few restricted areas that were only accessible to high-level personnel. Here was where they kept valuable and dangerous prisoners -- the only place they were not likely to make it out alive. The holes in the sound-proofing panels on the ceiling housed tiny selective lasers that would cut anything whose DNA was not entered into its database. In effect, an OZ personnel would be treated to a fancy light show while an intruder would be cut to pieces where he stands. At first, Nami thought that the concept was just wishful thinking on the part of OZ. That was, until Dr. Koudai made an example of one of the prisoners. It was horrifying to stand there while the lasers virtually ripped another living human being into shreds. After the ‘show,’ there wasn’t much left of the prisoner that could even be identified as being once-human.

Nami’s footsteps echoed eerily as she walked through the empty halls and she wrapped her arms around her body to keep herself from shivering. As a child, she’d suffered from claustrophobia after she had been trapped in the family car and it happened to roll into a lake during a family trip. Since then, she’s never been able to stand enclosed spaces. The narrow halls of the B-3 level weren’t helping much and Nami didn’t want anything more than to run back into the somewhat larger elevator and collapse outside the military building. She stopped in front of an another panel, slipped her ID in, and watched the door slide open. Inside, she saw Major Brenner, the man in charge of the facility, and some of his lackeys looking through the one-way mirror at the ongoing interrogation. Nami’s body breathed a sigh of relief upon entering the reasonably large room and she stepped up next to the major.

"How’s the interrogation going?"

The man looked at the smaller female and resisted the urge to pat her on the head. She reminded him too much of the daughter he’d left at home to assume command of the base. "So far, we have not been able to get anything out of these two."

Nami re-directed her attention towards the two captives and stiffened at the sight. A small trickle of blood had erupted from a cut on the brunette’s lip and a several bruises were starting to form on his face. The rest of his torso was shielded from view by the turtleneck he wore but she didn’t doubt that there were far worse bruises underneath. Two soldiers were holding back the blonde boy that had caught Dr. Koudai’s attention earlier. Nami bit her lip and winced as a soldier punched the frail boy in the stomach and he curled up into a ball on the floor.

Major Brenner saw her reaction and squeezed her shoulder in reassurance. He’d watched Nami’s reactions to previous interrogation sessions and he’d had surmised that she was amongst the sturdiest women he’s ever seen, but then again, those previous prisoners were all able bodied men, not like these children. He’d often wondered what kind of world this planet has become if the future they were fighting to protect had become the weapons of the present. "Are you alright?" he asked her as she looked up at him.

She nodded, making her short hair bounce a bit. "Daijobu. I... I was just feeling a bit confined on the walk over. Narrow hallways and all that," she replied with a reassuring smile. "Actually, I’m here for the blonde. Dr. Koudai’s orders."

The major nodded and opened the line from the observation room into the interrogation room. Almost immediately, quiet gasping could be heard coming from the floor and the labored breathing of the soldiers coupled with small curses rushed into the room. "Bring the blonde to the hallway and place him in cuffs. Dr. Maruka will meet you there." He turned off the link and nodded to Nami. "I hope Dr. Koudai gets more out of him."

Nami smiled up at him and took in a deep breath as left the room and once again entered the hallway from hell. Outside, she saw the two soldiers who’d been holding the boy earlier placing thick cuffs that bound his wrists and most of his arms together. She nodded and the soldiers returned to their posts. The blonde boy continued to look down on the floor as she prodded him forward. They reached the elevator without incident and that was the first time he looked up. He was a good four inches smaller than her and was very handsome. Nami couldn’t help but shudder, thinking about what new creative tortures her superior could have in store for him.

"You must be Dr. Maruka."

She raised an eyebrow at him but did not answer.

They reached the ground level and made their way out of the building. Once out, they were still a good 100 meters away from the research facility. She could see the boy regarding her with such an innocent expression that she wanted to laugh. There were a lot of things that could be called innocent, but she thought that they both no longer fit into that category, despite their appearances. Almost as soon as they arrived at the main research facility, Dr. Koudai’s other assistants pounced on the boy and hauled him away. Nami just blinked at them in surprise as they took him into the lab.

"As always, you are very prompt," Dr. Koudai whispered into Nami’s ear.

The younger scientist nearly jumped as she felt her blow a teasing breath into her ear. One of the things Dr. Koudai was good at, besides her research work, was making people feel off-balanced. Nami scuttled on back to her desk to put as much distance as she could between her and Dr. Koudai. A light blush made its way to her face as she went through her papers. She saw the other woman walking towards her and she immediately wished that the others hadn’t left her alone. She gulped audibly as she watched her sit on her desk and crossed her legs, showing a more-than-generous-amount of thigh in the process. "M-Mizu," she stammered, looking at her pen-holder, in an attempt not to look at her superior. "I... I d-don’t think...."

Dr. Koudai surprised her by laughing. "I know about you and Kai, and I approve, by the way," she said, standing back up and handing her a clipboard. "Anyway, back to business. I want you to administer these to the boy at three eight hour intervals and be sure to keep track of his reactions."

Nami’s eyes immediately widened upon seeing the list of drugs. "Mizu, you can’t be serious! Grown subjects have died under these treatments! He won’t last the first dosage!"

"Don’t think I haven’t considered that, Nami," she replied, an edge coming to her voice. "I’ve discovered a flaw in the experiment. Adults no longer develop, but maintain their state. There is no opportunity for the gene treatment to work positively since it needs to be incorporated into a developing organism. By my calculations, introducing it to that kid would give us an 80% success rate." She looked into her eyes and continued. "Don’t you want all of this to be over? If the drugs work, this war could be over and the killing would stop. What’s one rebel kid compared to the millions of innocent children that we would save with that sacrifice? I say that it’s a risk worth taking."

Nami slowly nodded her assent and was rewarded by Mizu’s most winning smile. She had a point, after all. What’s one rebel child? Upon her arrival to the laboratory proper, the first thing that caught her attention were the three trays of drugs that had been arranged on a cabinet near the wall. She walked over and dumped a handful of disposable syringes from a canister onto one of the trays and carried it to where the boy was. He’d been stripped of his original clothing, dressed in a hospital gown and had been strapped down onto the room’s bed. A few bruises showed on his pale skin and Nami knew that he must’ve put up a fight once the cuffs had been taken off.

"I’ll take over from here," Nami said to the two burly orderlies that flanked Quatre’s bed. "Go see if Dr. Koudai needs you for something else." She watched them go and started opening the syringes. It was all she could do not to look at the boy’s face. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw his eyes widen as he watched her actions.

"What do you think you’re doing?!" He asked her in mild panic as he saw her tapping the bubbles out of the first syringe.

"My job," Nami replied simply and drove the needle into his vein with practiced ease. "For the next 48 hours, you and I will be inseparable. There will be no one else in this room but the two of us and you might as well get used to it." She filled another syringe and injected it into him. Mizu would have been proud had she heard the coldness in her protégé’s voice.

Quatre shut up and took the drugs as silently as he could -- biting down on his lip to keep himself from screaming as several coursed through his being like molten lava. he thought as she administered the last of them. His training as a Gundam pilot allowed him to take the drugs, unfortunately, from the number of bottles he could still make out, he knew that there would be more of these ‘sessions’ before they obtain their results or killed him in the process. Some of the drugs were taking their effect and were making his eyes water as they lost focus. The last thing he could remember before he lost consciousness was the woman taking a seat nonchalantly near the door with her clipboard in her hand.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Quatre woke up screaming. He’d had the dream again. Someone placed a cool, damp towel on his forehead and he turned his head to see the woman who’d escorted him to laboratory holding a stainless steel bowl in her hand. Normally, he would have been comforted by the sight, if only the expression of indifference of the woman’s face had been absent.

"Daijobu desu ka?"

He couldn’t help but blink at her. There was absolutely no concern in her voice. She might as well had been asking about the weather. "I’m fine," he murmured under his breath. The restraints that had initially been holding him down onto the bed had been removed. They didn’t need to worry about him trying to get away -- his body felt more like it was made of lead than flesh and bone. It was already a great effort to turn his head from side to side.

"You surprised me, ‘you know that?" Nami said as she changed the towel on his forehead. "I expected you to die within minutes from the drugs, but you held on."

"What...," Quatre started to say. His voice sounded alien to him, like the time he was starting to recover from laryngitis when he was younger. "What... did you do... to me?"

"I suppose it wouldn’t hurt for you to know," she replied as she dragged a seat next to the bed. "The drugs are basically experimental genes that actively attack a the nuclei of a person’s cells. In effect, they will change who you are genetically. If successful, the person who has undergone the treatment will become nothing short of superhuman -- at least, that’s what the theory we’re working on says is supposed to happen."

The implications of what Nami had said swam through Quatre’s mind. Soldiers that would be able to withstand crushing g-forces would mean the development of mobile suits a lot faster than the mobile tauruses that their informants have told them about. Stronger soldiers would also mean that they would be able to handle heavy armaments without putting too much strain on their muscles while piloting the suits. An image of Trowa cradling his arm after piloting Heavyarms came to his mind and he shuddered. Mobile suits with that had human pilots were a lot more dangerous than the most sophisticated of computers -- humans had intuition and instincts. he thought glumly,

"Want something to eat?"

As if a light had been turned on, Quatre’s stomach began to grumble its assent. He remembered that he hadn’t had anything to eat since they’d left the boarding school they were staying at and who knows how long he’d been out? The woman came back with a plate of food that she’d set down upon a table beside the bed. Quatre felt the half of the bed his upper torso was on slowly incline upwards when she pressed a button somewhere on the bed’s side. He watched as she placed a small table on the bed and the tray of food on top it. He blushed a little as she began to feed him, as though he was a child. He looked up at her in surprise when he heard a small laugh escape from her lips.

"You really are beautiful, Quatre Raberba Winner," she whispered as she stared into his eyes. "I must admit, I have never seen anyone who looks as innocent as you."

Quatre nearly choked on his food as he felt his breath quicken and he stared at her. She’d called him by his name. Panic welled up in him as he replied. "H-how...? How did you know who I was?"

"I took a sample of your blood before I injected you with the first drug," she answered. "I just wanted to know who you were... not even Dr. Koudai knew I did it."

"Would you do me the honor of telling me your name?"

"My name is Nami. Dr. Nami Maruka."

They spent the rest of the time in silence after that. Quatre was content with knowing her name and she seemed to be content in keeping their interaction at just that.

After 16 hours, all three sets of drugs had been injected into Quatre’s system and Nami watched the boy sleeping fitfully on the bed, the monitors that she’d attached to his body indicating that, despite whatever emotional turmoil he may be going through, he was fine. That was, until 20 hours after the last drug had been injected.

Nami was awakened from an unanticipated nap by the rapid blipping of the EKG monitor and the noise coming from the bed. She awakened to see Quatre spasming on the bed and he was breathing heavily. She rushed to his side and touched his forehead. It was cold -- too cold; and from the EKG reading, it looked like he was having a heart attack.

She rushed to the intercom and pushed the buttons that would contact Dr. Koudai and the emergency medical division. "We have an emergency. Patient’s may be experiencing severe hypothermia and may enter cardiac arrest. I need your help now!" She didn’t wait for a response and immediately started him on warm IV fluids. she thought as the med team rushed into the room.

*-*-*

Quatre woke up and looked at his surroundings. The last thing he remembered was falling asleep with Dr. Maruka keeping her vigilance over him. Right now, he was sitting on a meadow covered with wildflowers that looked slightly faded -- as though they were prints on a cloth that had been washed too many times. He stood up and began to walk. In the back of his mind, he knew that he’d seen this landscape before, but he couldn’t place where.

After a few more minutes of walking, he saw a figure in a billowing cloak leaning against a tree. A smile lit up his face as he rushed to the figure -- happy that he was not alone in that place. "Um, excuse me," he said as he slowed his pace to a walk. "If you don’t mind, I’d like to know where this place is."

The figure turned to him and smiled. Quatre looked at him quizzically. The hood of the cloak covered more than half of his face and all he could see was his mouth. He saw him walking towards him and he smiled in return, hoping that this would not lead to a confrontation.

"You should know this place better than anyone, Mr. Winner," he replied as he continued to smile. "After all, you were the one who created it."

"What are you talking about?" Quatre answered, totally confused. "Just who are you anyway?"

"Why, I’m you."

Quatre’s eyes widened in shock as a strong gust of wind tore the hood off the stranger’s head and he found himself staring at his own face. A shudder passed through him as he looked at his twin’s eyes and saw an emotion he had always hidden, displayed so openly in those deep blue orbs.

Hatred.

*-*-*

"Nami, what the hell happened?!"

It had been five minutes since all hell had broken loose and Mizu had pulled her out of the crowd of doctors that were trying to stabilize the boy. Mizu was still in her nightgown and had rushed to the research lab upon Nami’s call. She’d seen the initial results of the gene test and she knew that she was close to success. There was no way she was going to let this child die and rob her of the glory that she has worked for for so long.

"I don’t know," Nami replied, the strain of having to stay on duty for so long evident in her voice. "One minute, he was fine, the next minute he was having a heart attack. It just doesn’t make sense. I was prepared for this, but I expected it to come within minutes or even an hour after the drugs were injected, but not after this long."

"He’s Gundam pilot, Nami. With them, things aren’t supposed to make sense," she replied as she watched her subordinates scurrying around the bed. She was beginning to sink into deeper thoughts when a sound she had been dreading echoed through the room.

Quatre’s heart had stopped beating.

*-*-*

Quatre almost lost his balance as an earthquake shook the entire scene. "What’s happening?" He said turning to his double.

"It looks like we’re dying," he said nonchalantly as gusts of wind swept all the color off the meadow and the ground began to dissolve from the horizon. "This landscape we’re in is the first scene that greeted us when we first landed on Earth. Too bad it would seem to also be the last thing we’ll see as we die."

"How can you talk like that?!" Quatre said, anger and panic coming to his voice. "I’ve never been as cold as you! How dare you call yourself me!"

"I’m a side that you’ve been trying to deny all your life, Quatre," he replied with a smile of pure evil. "I am all your hate, all your anger, all your evils rolled into one. I have been living inside you all your life -- chained by your consciousness and kept from coming to the surface because you were always too gentle, always too kind."

The shock in his eyes faded as a thought came into mind. "The dreams...."

"Yes, I created the dreams," he replied as he walked closer to him. "It was my way of saying that I exist. My way of telling you that even within an angel like you lurks a demon waiting to be released." He crossed his arms and cocked his head in his direction. "Right now, it appears as though the only way you will be able to live is if you let me loose."

Quatre let his anger wash over him and felt it in the single word that escaped from his lips. "Never."

*-*-*

"He’s not responding to CPR!"

"Get the cardiac paddles [2]!" Dr. Maruka gestured for an aide to push the machine to the side of the bed. There was no way she was going to let him die. She picked up the paddles and one of the other doctors placed conductive gel on the metal panels. "Stand back!" She shouted as placed the paddles on Quatre’s chest. "Clear!" She pressed the buttons and felt his body jump under the electrical current.

"Still a flat liner!"

*-*-*

"Never?" A small, mocking smile of resignation came to the other Quatre’s face as he shrugged his shoulders. "Oh well, I guess you place much less importance upon the life of someone else than your own."

Quatre narrowed his eyes at his double’s remark. "What do you mean?" If this was indeed his demon, it would be full of tricks.

"Him." That simple reply opened up a portal in the ‘sky’ and he saw Trowa lying on the floor of a prison cell. He was having trouble breathing and he was covered with bruises. Scabs had formed on wounds on his face and a dark red stain was on the bandage wrapped around his head. The double’s smile widened when he saw the anguish in the other boy’s face. "If you die now, Trowa might as well be dead. Don’t you see? The others aren’t likely to come back for you even if they would want to. The colonies won’t let them take the chance of being caught just for the sake of two pilots who had been sloppy on their last mission."

"Why?" Quatre said as he clutched his own arms to keep himself from shaking. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because I know that you wouldn’t survive on your own." The double walked over to him and the expression of hate in his eyes changed into the more-familiar expression of empathy that was characteristic of him. "Don’t you see? You have spent too much energy keeping me down and there’s not enough left to keep you alive. If you let me go, I can take over. I can pull you out of this, Quatre, I have the power to make you live. So what’s it going to be?"

*-*-*

Dr. Maruka wiped the sweat off her brow. She’d shocked him three times already and he still refused to respond. They’d already been at it for twenty minutes and they might have to call the time of death any second. Still, she couldn’t shake the image of the boy in her head. She had seen him smile. There was no way she was going to let him die.

"One more time," she whispered as she prepared the paddles.

"Nami, it’s over," Kai said as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "Let him go."

"No, it’s not over!" She said those words with such unbridled emotion that Kai took several steps back. "Don’t you ever tell me that it’s over! Not until I say it is!"

"Have it your way," he replied as he took a step back. He watched as Nami tried to shock the boy back to life. He shook his head in sympathy.

*-*-*

All that was left of the landscape was the six by six meter plot of land that the two Quatres were standing on. They both knew that they were running out of time and that the decision whether to live or die rested upon their shoulders. Quatre closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he made up his mind. he thought as he looked at his double. "I’ll do it."

Almost as soon as he said those words, black bat wings sprouted from the double’s back as wicked laughter rang throughout the land. He watched his double walk up to him with a smile of triumph and he closed his eyes as he felt him wrap him in his arms.

"Thank you, dear Quatre," he replied as he ran his fingers through the other’s hair. He wrapped his wings around them both and kissed him full in the mouth, sealing the latter’s decision. He deepened his kiss, basking in the power that the transfer of consciousness gave him. He wanted that power -- longed for it, lusted for it.

Like a vampire that has drained a victim dry, he released the other Quatre’s lips and held the unconscious body in his arms. In a single thought, the decay of the land stopped and in another instant, the land was restored, only this time, it was not the peaceful meadow, but the aftermath of a battlefield, with corpses piled high upon one another and the air choked with the stench of blood and decay. A smile of contentment came to his face as the unconscious one faded out and he made his way to a throne of rotting flesh. His time was limited, he knew, and the instant the other consciousness awakens, he would once again be sealed. But until then, he was free.

*-*-*

"WE HAVE A PULSE!"

A chorus of applause and cheers echoed through the room as Nami, her adrenaline rush spent, dropped the paddles from suddenly numb hands and collapsed in her fiancé’s arms, crying softly. The sound of the EKG’s quiet blipping seemed to be the sweetest music to her at that time.

"Miracle worker," Kai whispered into her ear. "You are one hell of a miracle worker." He felt her snuggle closer to him and he held her tighter. There were times when he wondered what good deed he’d done in his life to deserve someone like her.

As soon as Nami regained her composure, the rest of the staff converged upon her like a tidal wave, expressing their congratulations. Mizu was the last to get to her and the expression on her superior’s face was more than enough of a reward.

"Well done, Dr. Maruka," she said, shaking her hand. "That was one of the best comebacks I’ve ever seen." She turned to face the staff. "Good job, all of you. You are the best research and medical team I have ever worked with. It looks like we’re home free on the super soldier project. Once the boy wakes, we can conduct the rest of our testing and then, we can finally seal the victory of OZ for peace. Until then, all of you get some rest. You earned it." Dr. Koudai waited for everyone to file out of the room before turning to the boy. she thought as she ran the back of her hand gently down one pale cheek. She reached into the lab coat she’d thrown over her nightgown and pulled out a small vial that she always kept with her. She tucked the vial back into her coat and walked out of the room, her mind racing with plans for her newest soon-to-be-acquired toy.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"So, you’re finally awake."

Quatre slowly opened his eyes, grateful for the dim lighting in the room. He immediately noted the absence of the array of medical devices that had been present the last time he’d been conscious. Now, the room resembled a somewhat comfortable hospital suite -- the kind that only unbelievably rich people could afford to stay in. He tried moving his arms and he was glad that, although they were a little stiff, they no longer felt painfully heavy. Wincing a little with the effort, he managed to sit up on the bed and looked around. The silhouette of a woman, leaning on the wall was all he could make out from the lighting. "Dr. Maruka?" His voice sounded gravely -- a bit like having slept with a bad cough.

"I’m sorry to disappoint you," the woman said as she emerged from the shadows.

She had auburn hair and blue eyes. Quatre thought coldly as he regarded her. He recognized her as the woman he’d seen when they got captured. Dr. Koudai. She’d left her lab coat open and he saw that she was wearing something that looked more suitable for the bedroom than work.

"You’ve been asleep for 24 hours since you had your little attack," she told him as she made her way closer to him and sat on the bed. "Nami came in a few hours ago to check up on you and left with her fiancé saying that she would check up on you again before she returns home. Until then," she whispered, as she slid closer and cupped his face in one hand, "it’s just the two of us." She nudged her face lightly against his and smiled inwardly as he slowly closed his eyes with his mouth slightly open. That was all the encouragement she needed and she kissed him.

Quatre could feel the woman starting to become more aggressive as he felt her coaxing his mouth open with her tongue. He obliged her and even encouraged her more by meeting her tongue with his. Her long, painted fingernails dug into his back and he lay back down to keep them from biting into his flesh any more than they already were. He released her lips and a smile of total malice lit up inside of him. He knew she liked him the first time he saw her and had fanned that ember into an all-consuming flame. From the wild look in her eyes, he knew that she would die on the spot if she couldn’t have him. He watched in mild amusement as she let her lab coat fall softly to the floor and arranged herself beside him. Maniacal laughter wanted to burst from his lips as he began kissing her neck. She’d been so easily deceived by her passions and had plunged headfirst into the spider’s web.

Mizu Koudai was still basking in the pleasure that was dancing through her entire being when she heard Quatre whisper into her ear.

"I’m going to kill you now."

A vise-like grip immediately clamped down on her throat and she clawed at the hands of the boy that had minutes ago been her willing toy. Malevolence made his eyes glint brightly against the dim light and for the first time in her life, Dr. Koudai knew fear. It was as though she was staring at the devil himself. Despite all her struggles, she couldn’t loosen the tightening grip he had on her throat. It was a shock, though, when she felt his hand loosen on their own, unfortunately, she couldn’t move that much. He’d trapped her between his legs and she couldn’t budge him off her. She saw was him smiling innocently as he caressed her hair, his hands moving down to her neck. A scream tried to rip itself loose out of her as she succumbed into the arms of cold death. A rapidly blurring, final image of the boy covered with her blood, with that innocent smile still on his lips was the last thing she saw.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Nami entered the security code on the door’s lock as she entered the laboratory. It was past eleven in the evening and she’d convinced Kai to make one quick stop at the lab before they returned home. Locking the door behind them, they proceeded to enter Quatre’s room. They had just closed the door and, as soon as their eyes adjusted to the dim light, the scene that greeted them made them both want to retch.

Their head researcher was lying dead with her throat ripped open and the angelic, blonde boy was sitting beside her licking the blood off his hands.

The sound of quiet sobbing made Quatre turn his head in their direction. "So you came to visit me, after all," he said in his most pitiful, lost-child voice. He moved off the bed and started walking in their direction. "When I woke up, I was afraid that I wouldn’t see you again."

"Mizu... why, Quatre?" Nami’s voice shook as she gripped Kai’s arm tightly.

"Because she wanted to hurt me. Because she wasn’t you."

"We’re leaving," Kai whispered into her ear and moved to unlock the door behind them.

"I won’t let you." He heard Nami screamed as he whipped a gun from behind him and shot Kai. Even before he became a Gundam pilot, he and his father had often gone hunting. The man was dead even before he hit the floor from a small bullet wound at the back of his head. A disinterested look came to his face as he watched Nami cradle Kai in her arms, sobs wracking her body. The blood stains on his hospital gown had already dried, making the garment stiff. Three quick steps brought him over to the woman.

"What now? Are you going to end my life here, too?" She asked him, not willing to meet his eyes.

"No," he answered simply. "But I do need you to help me find Trowa. I promise that you will never see me again after that."

Nami watched in fear as he rummaged through the room’s closet and found some clothes that would fit him. In her mind she knew that she shouldn’t trust him, not after what he did to Kai. she thought. She knew that when a human is stripped of everything, the basic instinct of self-preservation will prevail and, more often than not, even at the expense of another’s life.

"Let’s go," he said as he tucked the gun at the small of his back and shrugged on the uniform’s jacket.

The guards of the base changed in three shifts and the ones currently on duty were not the ones who were present during their capture. A smile lit up inside him as Nami talked her way through the guards, and given her profile, there was no place on the facility that she had no access to. Quatre saw an expression of mild panic come to her face as they reached B-3 level. It was the same expression on her face the first time he’d seen her outside the interrogation room. With an unsteady breath, Nami slid her ID card pressed her palm upon the ID panel. With a small hiss, the door opened and she stepped in. She looked up and saw that the laser security system was still on. Once she manages to get him into the corridor, it would all be over and she would be free.

"Wait." He offered a her a small smile as he took something out of his pocket. Nami immediately recognized it as one of the many lab mice that Mizu kept in the laboratory outside the room Quatre had been in. He patted the small animal and released it into the corridor. Almost immediately, several colored rays struck it and verily ripped the animal apart. Quatre pulled out the gun at her and smiled. "Nice try. Unfortunately, I already know that this place must have some form of security system that could only be deactivated from the inside. One of the soldiers pressed a code into one of the panels before they let me into the corridor. Now I know why. If you would be so kind, please step back out here."

Nami followed his instructions and no sooner was she out of the corridor, he hit her on the back of the neck and she crumpled to the floor. Quatre hoisted the small woman over him. It was a good thing that she was light enough for him to carry but large enough to shield him from the laser’s sensors. He retraced the way they passed a few days ago and stopped the door where he and Trowa had been kept, hoping that they hadn’t moved him to a different cell. He nearly got his hand pulverized by a laser beam when he reached for the ID card in Nami’s pocket and he silently commended the person who came up with the base’s defenses. The door opened after he swiped the card in the slot and they entered. He heaved a sigh of relief when he noticed that the room did not have the defenses of the corridor. It was a good thing that the designer hadn’t been paranoid enough to put defenses in all of the facility’s rooms. He set Nami down on a nearby chair and flipped the lights open in the observation room beyond the glass paneling. He could see Trowa’s crumpled form lying on the floor and at least ten of the wounds that Quatre could see looked more than enough to have claimed his life. A grim expression came to his face as he opened the door after cuffing Nami to the chair to make sure that she wouldn’t be able to leave. Trowa flinched at his touch but did not wake.

Quatre said to himself, as he held him close for a moment. A flash of pure anger and hatred flickered in his eyes as he shoved the gentle part of his mind back into his subconscious. That part of him had started to stir faster than he’d expected. He’d have to move as quickly as possible.

He managed to drag Trowa out of the room and flicked off the light switch. Nami was just beginning to stir as the green light of the small wall panel lit up, indicating that the laser security system had been successfully deactivated. He saw the slight ripple of Nami’s throat as she swallowed, looking at Trowa. Quatre walked over to her and gently cupped her chin so that she was looking directly into his eyes. "I’ll be leaving now," he whispered to her.

A calm look came to her face as she saw the end of her horrifying ordeal. Quatre picked up Trowa from the chair he’d deposited him and moved to the door. A puzzled look came to Nami’s face as Quatre once again turned to face her, the familiar, innocent look once again on his face.

"I almost forgot," he uttered as he adjusted his hold around Trowa’s waist. "When I told you that you’d never see me again, I’d meant it." He smiled wickedly at the expression of total horror on her face as he pulled out the gun and shot her point blank. He tucked the gun back and whispered to the dying woman, "remember, I never said that I wasn’t going to kill you."

He stayed until the last spark of life left her eyes. One of the harsh realities that Heero and Wufei had always been trying to pound into his head was the value of leaving no witnesses, no matter how hard it was to do so.

The base had become surprisingly empty ever since their capture. Quatre guessed that they didn’t expect an attack to come so soon, despite the capture of two of the terrorists. He managed to get Trowa out and back to where they’d hidden their Gundams. A part of Quatre sighed in relief that he still hadn’t regained consciousness while the part currently in control unceremoniously dumped him onto the ground. he mentally said to the other boy as he jumped into the cockpit of Heavyarms. Once activated, Quatre flew it to back to the base and trained the Gundam’s rockets in the direction of the underground research facility. He saw the mad rush of OZ personnel to reach the makeshift base hangars, but he was faster. In seconds, he’d managed to level the buildings and they exploded as the heat reached the fuel stores. Bodies of soldiers, researchers and other personnel littered the ground as he let out a laugh of pure ecstasy. He’d never felt so free in his entire life.

After he’d fired the last round, he surveyed what remained of the base. The research center was nothing more than a crater at the center of the base and the buildings had been reduced to rubble. By this time, Quatre was already heaving from exertion especially since his body has yet to fully heal. He returned to where he’d left Sandrock and Trowa. From the looks of things, he should be regaining consciousness in a few minutes. He used the time to regard the sleeping pilot -- his comrade in arms, his friend, his lover. However he turned it in his mind, it always boiled down to one thing. Trowa made him weak. He always made him hesitate. He always made him look for a merciful resolution. Pulling a knife out of the clothes he’d taken from the lab, he made his decision. Everything that made him weak should be eliminated. He pressed the knife to the boy’s throat and managed to draw a trickle of blood. An instant later, he plunged the knife into his own arm. He curled up into a ball as good and evil fought each other in his mind.

"Quatre?"

A small trickle of tears came to his eyes as he looked up at Trowa who was still wincing from his wounds. With one last mental effort, he subdued his demon and sent it back to the darker regions of his mind. He felt Trowa take him into his arms and he collapsed into the wave of welcome unconsciousness that washed over his battered body.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"So that’s what the experiment was about."

Quatre nodded as Duo gave a low whistle. Trowa had managed to contact the others and they were now gathered at Quatre’s hospital room. Surprisingly enough, Trowa had only suffered minor injuries with the exception of one broken arm. Quatre, on the other hand, was being kept under strict observation. One of the colony doctors had come down to Earth to tend to him personally, given the delicate nature of his injuries. The doctor had brought with him Quatre’s DNA records so that he could see the extent of the damage Dr. Koudai’s experiment had done to him. "What happened after we were caught?" Quatre asked Duo as Trowa continued to sit by his side.

"Well," Duo said thoughtfully as he flipped a seat and straddled it. "Dr. J and the others haven’t given us any missions, if that’s what you mean. To tell you the truth, I was pretty much ready to go after you myself when I heard that a Gundam leveled the base." He nodded approvingly at Trowa. "Good job, man! You really raised some hell back there!" A puzzled look came to Duo’s face when Trowa’s visible eye looked at Quatre. "You’re kidding," Duo whispered as he realized what had actually happened. "You mean Quatre’s the one?"

Trowa nodded wordlessly as the exchange between him and Duo caught the attentions of Heero and Wufei. Truth be told, he had been more than a bit shocked when he saw the documented report in his Gundam’s memory file. He was shaken out of his contemplations when the colony doctor entered the room. He placed a hand comfortingly on Quatre’s shoulder as he smiled.

"Once again, I must say that you are one lucky young man," he said as he handed him the DNA test results. "I ran the tests twice on each of the two times I took your blood samples. The first one showed that your body had indeed incorporated the new DNA strain. But the second test," he continued as he flipped the chart to show the second test result. "You will see here that Quatre’s antibodies are purging his body of the new DNA. Now, I can’t begin to think of a reason how this could even be possible, but the evidence in pretty much conclusive." The doctor took the chart back and extended a hand in Quatre’s direction. "Your cells should be back to normal in a few days. Once again, congratulations on another mission well done." He gripped the boy’s hand in a solid handshake.

Soon after the doctor left, Duo dragged the two other pilots out of the room saying that ‘Quatre needed his rest’ leaving him alone with Trowa. The blonde smiled wryly at him as he breathed in deeply. He was still more than a bit shaken by what had happened, more by his internal battles than his physical ordeal.

Trowa brushed some stray strands of his hair from his face and kissed him gently. "Je t’aime [3]," he whispered. "I’m so glad you’re going to be okay."

Quatre silenced the rest of his words when he kissed him back. Right now, he didn’t want to think about anything else. What was important to him is that he and Trowa were together.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil...."

Quatre felt Iria’s hand tremble as he squeezed it comfortingly, he himself trying to hide all the hurt and rage he felt inside. Cold rain had started to fall as he watched his father’s coffin being lowered into the grave. His father.... All he’d wanted was peace in the colonies. He’d tried to force OZ out of their colony by seizing the resource satellite that they’d wanted to use to make more mobile suits. It had been a valiant effort, but he’d paid for it with his life.

"He was a good man, Mr. Winner," one of the colony heads said as he placed a hand on the teen’s shoulder. "I am so sorry."

The blonde nodded his head, but refused to look at the man. It was a good thing that he’d taken it as a sign of grief. In truth, he did not want anyone to see his rage. There would be a time for that later.

After the funeral, Iria found her brother sitting in one of the Winner assembly lines, punching in codes. She walked up to him just as he pushed the final button initiating the assembly of a new Gundam. "What are you doing?" Iria asked him, obviously not expecting much of an answer. "We’ve already lost Father, Quatre, and I’d be damned if I’m going to lose you, too!"

"You’re not going to lose me, Sis," he replied quietly. "This is the mechanics of the new model of Heero’s Gundam. It has a program that will make the pilot close to invincible. They call it the Zero System." He turned around in his seat and looked at his sister with red, puffy eyes. He’d already shed all of his tears and now it was time to do something. "I’m going to make them pay for Father’s death."

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Quatre put on his helmet and crossed the weightless void between him and Wing Zero. He resolutely opened the cockpit and sat down. He’d sworn vengeance for his Father’s murder and he was determined to make everyone pay. He saw the word ‘ZERO’ on his screen signaling the system’s activation and along with it came a familiar nudging in his mind. This time, he didn’t fight it, in fact, he embraced it, willing himself to drown in the cold fury that sought to consume his very soul.

A smile lit up his face as he prepared to set out. a voice said in his mind as he felt the demon’s presence encompassing his mind.