^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
HOW CRUEL YOU ARE
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Genre: Lord knows
After reading The Catcher in the Rye I saw something in the feature
charecter that screamed out, 'Nabiki!' to me. Thus, 'How Cruel You Are'
was born. The title came from the Christmas OAV when Nabiki tells Ranma,
'What a cruel thing to say.' I loved the line, and . . .
----------------------------
"Ranma," I called out, "what are you doing?" Why in this wide
world was he reading Daddy's Superman comics? Those things suck.
Ranma looked up, guilty.
"Nothing," he called back, wincing. Sure. I could almost believe
that. Still, figuring out what he was doing wasn't worth the energy.
I was pretty bored and I thought about giving old Ukyou a buzz,
but then I figured she'd take it the wrong way. People always do. How
cruel they are.
My friends were mostly out, since it was Sunday and they had
better things to do then sit around. Anybody else I knew would think it
was part of a plot if I called them up or invited them to a matinee. How
cruel.
Akane . . . maybe Akane.
I knocked on her door and waited politely. She opened it.
"Hey, big sister," she said cheerfully, smiling and gesturing me
inside. I lounged on her bed and watched her finish hanging up her laundry.
"Little sis-want to go to a movie?"
"Sure!" she said, real happy and all. I like Akane. She's really
innocent and all and it's pretty easy to have fun with her.
"Hey Nabiki, can Ranma come?"
No.
"Yeah, sure," I said, trying to sound disappointed so maybe she'd
take a hint. But not loveworn Akane, oh no.
"Great!" she said, still happy.
I could picture it in my mind; Akane'd be real sweet and shy and
ask Ranma to go with us to the movie. Then Ranma would insult one or both
of us and blatantly refuse. Akane would get angry, punch the living
daylights out of him, and tell me she wasn't feeling well and didn't want
to go to the movies. Fade out. The end. How cruel Ranma is.
Or, of course, Ranma would accept, and we'd get stuck watching
some sort of crude male movie and get saddled with hundreds of his dweeby
girlfriends tagging along. What a cruel trick fate played on me, to bring
Ranma into our house.
Ranma should just stop hedging around and marry Ukyou or Akane.
The thought of him with Shampoo was nauseating. In fact, Shampoo in
herself was nauseating. Then, if he married Ukyou she'd drag him off to
Kingdom Come and in a few years we'd get Baby Shower invitations. And if
he married Akane, we'd have the dojo bringing in enough money to get me
to college. But if they ever had kids, either I was moving or they were.
I hate kids.
Pulling myself out of my reverie, I realized that there was one
way to get to the movies.
"Hey Akane, I'll go ask Ranma, okay?"
"Sure," she said, smiling.
I walked over to Ranma's room, leering a little. I had won. I
would go to the movies with Akane, and Ranma would not.
I opened the door without bothering to knock. It wasn't his house
and he didn't deserve privacy.
"Hey Ranma."
"Hi, Nabiki," he said warily. What a cruel boy he is.
"Say - I heard that the French restuarant downtown is giving away
free food. You might wanna go check, hmm?" He's so stupid he'll believe
all the garbage I feed him. Just about the only thing he's good for is
amusement.
"Really?" he asked, becoming animated.
"Of course. Would I lie?"
He ignored that last. "Gee, thanks."
"Anytime." I left and told Akane that he had some things to do
and was sorry he couldn't go. There. She'll feel better if I told her he
was sorry.
She seemed disappointed, but still pretty happy. That's why I like
Akane. She sees only the good things.
After the movie, I lounged around and flipped through channels.
Usually I appreciated Sundays, but today was just plain boring.
The phone rang and I answered.
"Tendou resi-oh, hi Ranma."
"That French restaurant was NOT giving away free food," he said
heatedly. "Do you know how much my meal cost?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," I said, sounding sincere. I knew I sounded
sincere because I practiced all the time. I was a good actor, I knew.
"I really thought they were. I'm sorry, Ranma."
"Yeah . . ." his voice seemed to deflate. "Okay, Nabiki. Thanks."
He hung up and I laughed a little to myself. Ranma's so stupid he makes
me dizzy.
"Share the joke?" Kasumi asked. I spun around. I liked Kasumi
too, but it was good to be leery of her. She knows more than she lets on.
"Just one of my friends," I said, speaking to my feet. I could
feel Kasumi frown, sigh, and go back to dusting.
In the back of my mind I always felt guilty when I lied to Kasumi.
She'd never really done anything to deserve it, so I always felt sort of
unjustified.
Vaguely, I heard Akane's joyous cry of 'P-Chan!' and my dad and
that panda talking out back. Bored, I listened to their conversation.
There wasn't anything better to do, and besides, they occasionally had
something interesting to say.
No such luck now. There they were, sitting on the porch discussing
the Odyssey. Good grief. How pathetic.
"P-Chan, let me get you something," Akane's voice came. Oh, her
piggie was back. "I made it just for you - P-Chan, where are you going?"
I saw a small black blur dashing madly around the livingroom.
"P-Chan . . ." Poor Akane. That look on her face. Sometimes I
think it's her lot in life to be disappointed and rejected. How cruel.
Poor Akane.
"P-Chan . . ." I picked him up. He was squirming like crazy as I
handed him to Akane.
"What is it you want to give him?" I asked, curious.
"Just a new bandana," she said, a little sadly. She struggled to
tie it on. "Oh P-Chan, I sewed it myself," she said, even sadder. She was
the very picture of melancholy.
P-Chan stopped squirming at this, and she fastened the bandana on.
Oh God. Ohgodohgodohgod. Don't let me laugh. Don't let me laugh.
"Err . . . I got some homework, Akaneseeyabye," I gasped out,
running up the stairs.
In the safety of my room, I doubled over, laughing till my sides
hurt. No wonder P-Chan had run like that. The 'bandana' might as well
have been a skirt.
Usually I wasn't that careful of her feelings, but then I
realized that if I didn't start being careful I'd be like Ranma and Akane
would think she hated me. So I tried to be a little nicer to her.
Afterall, I was better than Ranma and I deserved to be liked much more
than he did.
I heard Kasumi tell the panda and Daddy that it was dinnertime,
and I walked back to the dining room. Ranma was nowhere to be seen. Good
riddens. Now we would have a semi-peaceful meal, safe from Akane-Ranma
squabbles. I don't know if anyone else noticed. Well, too bad for them,
that they couldn't appreciate tranquility. What a buncha goons.
The next morning I got up and stretched, smiling a little. I
didn't mind school too much. I wasn't exactly glamorous, but it was
tolerable.
Ranma still wasn't home. Hmmmmph. Everyone was worried but me.
Stupid Ranma, always making a scene. Stupid Akane, for missing him.
I went to school alone. I was pretty let down, since I had been
expecting to walk with Akane like we had before Ranma had come. But Akane
was off looking for her beloved fiancee. How cruel she is, leaving me to
walk alone.
I was pretty well used to it, though. I don't really mind, since
it's certainly more peaceful.
At school, a bunch of people were asking me where Ranma was. I
had a little bit of fun giving them all sorts of varied and colorful
answers . . .
"Hey! Nabiki! Where's Saotome?"
"Ran away with Shampoo."
"Yo, Nabiki - where's Ranma?"
"Akane beat him to death."
"Hey, girl, have you seen Ranma anywhere?"
"Confidential. For 3,000 yen, though, I might let something slip."
And so it went. What fun! I lived for this sort of thing.
At lunch I got swarmed with people trying to figure out where
Akane and Ranma were. I couldn't believe some of the wild stories that
were going around, but I added some fuel to my favorites.
After school I took a back exit out. I was tired of dealing with
the ignorant masses. I trudged home, vowing that Ranma would have hell to
pay for this. What a cruel day.
"Hey, I'm home," I called, slamming the door behind me and
dropping my bookbag.
"Welcome home, Nabiki," Kasumi said placidly. "We found Ranma."
I got a snack. "Oh?"
"Yes," she told me, still smiling, "he was working in that fancy
restuarant downtown. Had to pay back his debt, he said."
"Oh," I replied, blandly. It seemed I wouldn't need to take
revenge, afterall. How cruel I am!
----------------------------
Comments welcome! Also flames. Bweheheh. Flames good.
Email: andry@la.fille.gq.nu
Website: http://la.fille.gq.nu/
'Boryoku: Ranma 1/2'
(
geocities.com/tokyo/courtyard) (
geocities.com/tokyo)