Gundam Wing Musical

by: Lauren

February 1999

The five gundam pilots sat in the rec-room.

" Sa, Heero, you think one of those crazy girls will call any of us anytime soon?" Duo asked as he took aim with a pool stick and sent the white Q-ball spinning.

" Don't jinx us Duo!" cried Quatre; " they've been pretty good about leaving us alone recently. I'm afraid of where we'll end up next."

Just then a black hole opened in the room and the boys were suck away…

" Oh no! Not another fic!" Duo whined as he was whirled away to God only knows where.

Heero blinked. He blinked again. The sight in front of him didn't change. Duo was still wearing a pink taffeta and lace dress, and his hair was in some impossible arrangement on his head with pink ribbons woven into it.

" Heero, whatcha staring… wow! You look handsome!"

Heero was dressed in an elegant black tux, but his face was half covered with a mask. Suddenly, without any warning, Heero began to… sing.

" Night time sharpens heightens each sensation…"

" Ah! Heero, stop it! You're killing me!" Duo shouted as he plugged up his ears with his fingers.

" Darkness wakes and stirs imagination!" Heero kept singing, oblivious to the cowering wreak on the floor.

" HEERO!!! STOP SINGING! YOU SOUND LIKE A DYING ANIMAL!"

Heero's mouth closed into a tight grimace.

" Duo, omea wa korosu!"

" Eek!"

Duo ran out a side door with Heero hot on his trails. As he passed through the door, the scene shifted, and Duo stopped to look around and found himself standing…

In the hills right above a monastery. Bright, healthy green grass was everywhere and the flowers were in full bloom. He turned to look and see if Heero had followed, and had to try and contain himself at what he saw. Heero was wearing a plain dress, the kind of dress nuns wear, and the black and white habit sat at his feet. He started to spin around in a circle and…

" The hills are alive, with the sound of music. With songs they have sung, for a thousand years…"

" He's singing again…" Duo couldn't contain his laughter and doubled over in the grass gasping for breath from laughing too hard. A bell starts to ring, interrupting Heero's ah… singing, and he suddenly takes off down the hill toward the monastery. Duo drags himself up and chases after his partner. As they pass through the gate of the monastery, they suddenly find themselves sitting in a park area. Heero is in another dress, this time it's a simple brown deal, tight fitting in the top and long and loose on the bottom. He's holding a guitar. Duo looks down to find himself in a pretty green and white dress much like Heero's.

" Guys! What're you all doing here? I thought Heero and I were the only ones in this messed up fanfic!" Duo exclaimed when he saw the other g-boys dress much like himself.

" We've just been sitting in this park, waiting for something to happen," Quatre responded.

" Now kids, to learn to sing. When you learn to read you begin with ABC. When you learn to sing you begin with Do, Re, Me."

" Do, Re, Me," the boys all obediently echoed Heero.

" The first three notes just happen to be…"

" Do, Re, Me…"

" Do a deer a female deer," Heero sang as he stood up. The other boys all followed and then began to play follow the leader around the park area while singing. Heero eventually lead them out of the park and they began to sing while dancing around a large water fountain.

" Re, A drop of golden sun…"

The boys helped pull Duo out of the fountain. His pretty white and green dressed was soaked through, but Heero didn't seem to notice, and kept right along leading them and singing.

" Me, a name I call myself…"

Each boy sang a line as he jumped down a stair. Heero began jumping back and forth up and down the stairs while sing.

" When you know the notes to sing, You can sing most anything!!!!!!!" The last note of anything was enough to burst eardrums.

" Ah! Enough!" Duo screamed as he pulled his hair and ran off into the hills, the others, continuing with the game, followed after Duo. As they got to the top of a hill, they found they were now back stage in a filthy bar.

" Duo…" Quatre giggled as he got a look at his friend.

Heero smirked and snapped Duo's bikini bottom, " Nice flag…"

" Enough, it's your turn," said a big hairy man that pushed Duo out onto a stage.

Duo looked at all the soldiers in the room and was mortified. But, as hard as he tried, he just couldn't fight the impulse. Duo found himself dancing and then, he started to sing.

" If I'm your pin-up I'll melt all your brass. Stuck on your wall with a pin in my ass."

Duo shook his aforementioned body part in a soldier's face and the man pinched it.

" If you get me you'll travel… ack!" Heero ran on stage grabbed Duo up and ran off. The boys all followed Heero's lead and ran out a side door to the place only to find themselves in…

"It's a dance floor?" Quatre observed, as he looked around just a bit bewildered.

" I'm sure this is all Yuy's fault!" Wufei exclaimed while he played with the lace on his long skirt. " Just what are we supposed to be doing anyway, and where did Yuy and Maxwell go?"

" I think we're supposed to be dancing," Quatre stated the obvious while he took Trowa's elbow and lead him out onto the dance floor, making sure to lift his long dress just enough so it didn't trip his steps.

Wufei glared up at the young man in front of him. " Did you want something?"

" Would you… ah… miss, you're so pretty that I'd be honored if you'd ah… dance with me," the young blond haired blue eyed boy in front of him stuttered.

As much as he tried to fight it, Wufei couldn't resist the impulse to accept.

" I'd… l…o…v…e… to dance with you," Wufei made a sour face in light of his response.

Duo sauntered right up to Heero with a huge grin plastered on his pretty face, threatening to split it in half.

" Sa, Heero, that is such a beautiful dress! The blue goes great with your eyes; looks much better on you than Re…"

" Omae wa korosu."

" Come, we have important talk now yeah."

" Sure, what's up," Heero responded trying to sound as uncheerful as possible and failing miserably.

" I'd like to speak to you about Duo Maxwell."

" Oh, him."

" Come on Heero, he's told me that he is, Crazy for you."

" Well, I can't help that. I'm already spoken for, in my heart anyway," Heero blanched at looked ready to vomit at the sappy lines coming from his mouth.

" It's that Wufei person isn't it. I told you I don't…"

" NO! It isn't Wufei. You just don't understand anything do you?" He struck a dramatic sailor moon like pose.

Duo made a face realizing that Heero was about to break into song. " Why must we continue to listen to him sing?!" Duo's mind screamed.

" Dozens of men would storm up. I had to lock my door. Some how I couldn't warm up to one before…"

" I didn't know you had circulation problems," Duo muttered.

" What was it that controlled me,"

" Those tight spandex shorts?"

" What kept my love life lean?" Heero continued, ignoring Duo's frequent and obnoxious interruptions.

" Couldn't get it up huh?"

Heero scowled, " My intuition told me, you'd come on the scene." Heero batted his eyelashes and gave Duo come-hither looks.

" Me?" Duo squeaked.

" Mister listen to the rhythm of my heart beat, and you'll know just what I mean… Embrace me my sweet embraceable you…"

" Oh God help us all he's singing again!" Duo mourned as Heero grabbed his hands and danced around him.

" Embrace me, you irreplaceable you!"

" Well, I am rather unique and special in that way…"

" Just one look at you my heart grew tipsy in me…"

" It's my dangerous, suave, and sophisticate image," Duo sighed.

" You and you alone bring out the gypsy in me," Heero put his leg on Duo's hip and slid down his body with the notes.

" Oh… maybe we should get a room, Heero."

Heero continued with his song, ignoring Duo's continued chatter.

" I love all the many charms about you."

Duo smirked, " Well, I am rather well endowed."

Heero grimaced, " Above all I want MY ARMS ABOUT YOU!!!" Heero's voice was high and off key, causing all the glass in the room to shudder violently, threatening to shatter at any second. Duo covered his ears cringing at the noise worse than nails down a blackboard.

" Okay, you should stop singing now…"

" Don't be a naughty baby," Heero wrapped his arms around Duo's neck.

" Really, you can stop singing anytime now."

" Come to Heero, come to Heero, Doooooo…"

" Not unless you stop singing!"

" My sweet embraceable…"

" That's it! I can't take anymore!" Duo cried as he grabbed Heero's hand and hauled him to the only visible exit. Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei followed not far behind.

Duo burst out laughing. This was becoming more and more of a habit for him.

" Heero! It's pink! With little white and silver stars, and wand!" Duo threw himself to the floor with giggles.

" You killed the Wicked Witch of the East Zechs," Heero intoned in a serious voice.

" Well…" Duo began to talk in tempo. " What happened then was this. The wind began to pitch, the house to twitch, and suddenly the hinges started to unhinge, just then a witch to satisfy an itch, came flying on her broom stick thumbing for a hitch."

" OH, what happened then was rich!" Quatre interrupted, still keeping with Duo's tempo.

The crowed around them parted and Trowa, Relena, and Hirde came threw in little pink tutus and pink point slippers. They began to sing and dance in front of Heero and Duo.

" We represent the Lullaby league, the Lullaby league, the Lullaby league. And in the name of the Lullaby league, we wish to welcome you to munchkin land." Trowa curtsied and handed Duo a bunch of flowers.

Suddenly there was an explosion and everyone except Duo and Heero ran to hide. Wufei, who until now no one had noticed, ran in circles around Duo's feet, frantically wagging his tail.

Treize appeared out of the smoke wearing a long black dress and pointy black hat, and stalked over to Duo, dragging his broomstick along side of him.

" Who killed my lover? Who killed the witch of the east? Was it you!?" He pointed an aristocratic finger at Duo, while looking him over with a hungry glare.

" It's was an accident! I didn't mean to do it! Why are you looking at me like that?!"

" I'll get you my pretty," Treize eyes Duo's hands that were playing with the trim on his pretty white and blue checked dress. He looked down at Wufei and smiled. " And you're little dog too!" Treize cackled and disappeared.

" I wanna go home!!" Duo cried in anguish. All the boys nodded, and Wufei wagged his little tail and barked. They took off down the yellow brick road out of munchkin land and found themselves in…

" Yeah! It's an amusement park! I like this world!" Duo cried for joy. He was now sporting a nice set of leather pants and with a white shirt and black leather jacket. He ran over to Heero who was now wearing a pair of tighter than tight black pants and a matching crop top. His hair was full of curls. Heero just sighed and resigned himself to the fate of wearing hideous outfits as long as this fic continued. The whole Gundam Wing cast started to dance behind them, as Duo and Heero lead them around the park singing.

" We go together like changidy changibob. Best Friends forever like boogiwoggi boggy shabop shabop. Chang Chang Changy shebang shebop, We'll always be together… waooooo… YEAH!"

The others continued to sing the nonsense while Heero and Duo kissed.

" We're always together… Always together…"

The lights flashed as the two kissed in a little pink car that slowly drove away toward the sun. They disappeared in the light and found themselves back in the Room Where Characters Wait Between Fics™. Duo was splayed out on the couch with Heero lying on top of him. Quatre found himself in Trowa's lap, and Wufei had his head hanging upside down from a table.

" Wow… That was sure strange." Quatre was the first to speak.

" Yeah, but it was sure a lot of fu…"

" NO!" the other four boys yelled in unison.

" Duo, if you jinx us again…"

" I know I know. Omae wa korosu," Duo sighed.